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Here’s all the depressing evidence so far that Orlando shooter Omar Mateen was covering up his sexuality.

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This week in "of course that guy who hated gays was actually gay," we now have tons of (extremely depressing) evidence that the homicidal, jihadist-inspired homophobic terrorist Omar Mateen might have actually been gay.

First of all, it's important to note that while there's a lot of evidence that suggests what Mateen's motivations might have been, nobody knows exactly what was going on in Mateen's head. There is no doubt that the guy definitely had some weird dad issues going on, but only (a fair amount of) anecdotal evidence that a conflict between sexuality and religion played a role in his crimes. The evidence does make clear, however, that he was raised to be severely homophobic, and therefore if he was gay, he was trapped deeply in the closet.

A selfie from Mateen's MySpace page. Yes, MySpace. He loved a uniform.

Initially, Mateen’s father gave America a much different picture, claiming that his son was “very angry” after seeing two men kiss in Miami. As time went on, however, it became clear that erasing any hint that Mateen himself was gay would be a theme in this story.

Then, the Canadian press reported that married couple and Pulse employees Ty Smith and Chris Callen said they had seen Mateen getting drunk at Pulse for over three years, and that Mateen repeatedly had to be asked to leave due to drunkenness. Often when he was in this state, he would complain loudly about how his father was "really strict" and how he'd been made to get married (although presumably not forced to beat her, which he did).

Then, the Palm Beach Post reported that as a student, Mateen had asked out one of his gay classmates, and they hung out at multiple gay nightclubs together. Per the post:

He said Mateen asked him out romantically.

“We went to a few gay bars with him, and I was not out at the time, so I declined his offer,” he said.

He believed Mateen was gay, but not open about it. Mateen was awkward, and for a while the classmate and the rest in the group of friends felt sorry for him.

“He just wanted to fit in and no one liked him,” he said. “He was always socially awkward.”

Then, Chris Hayes reported that Mateen had been messaging men on several gay dating apps.

Apparently, he had been asking what the gay clubs were good to go to, but he had already been going to clubs, so what was he really doing on Jack'd?

On top of all of this, there was new testimony from Mateen's ex-wife, Sitora Yusufiy, who had earlier revealed that Mateen had been "unstable" and "abusive." Yusuify has since moved to Brazil with her new boyfriend, and the two of them agreed to an interview on Brazilian TV.

Speaking for her in Protuguese, Sitora's new boyfriend said she had described Mateen as having “gay tendencies.” He also said she spoke of several occasions when his dad had called him gay in front of her.

It's dangerous to draw conclusions about whether being a closeted homosexual raised in a super-homophobic setting could cause a man to commit an atrocity like this, but it is also dangerous to not consider it. In a bid to take what we know and use it to move forward, here is what GLAAD has to say about these speculations.


Anderson Cooper has no chill when it comes to calling out Florida Attorney General Pam Bondi's record on gay rights. Wow.

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Anderson Cooper asked Florida Attorney General and top Trump supporter Pam Bondi how she could claim to be a champion for the LGBT community in the days after the Orlando shootings when she had vigorously argued against allowing legalizing gay marriage. (In 2014, Bondi had argued that even recognizing out-of-state gay marriages would "impose significant public harm" and suggested gay families are inherently unstable.)

And then Cooper asked about it again, and again, and again. It's almost uncomfortable to watch the interview—the questions are relentless—but it's worth your time to do so. It's also what journalism should look like.

"I will say I have never seen you talk about gays and lesbians and transgender people in a positive way until now," Cooper, the first openly gay primetime news anchor, eventually says.

The interview comes a day after Cooper made this incredible tribute to the victims in the attack the day before. If the video above made you angry, this one will make you sad:

And here's a video of a little girl dancing to "Uptown Funk" in her sleep, because you deserve it:

Yes, Brienne and Jaime are in love on 'Game of Thrones,' says Nikolaj Coster-Waldau.

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Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, the hunky actor who plays hunky sister-f*cker Jaime Lannister on Game of Thrones, finally admitted in real life what his character has thus far been unable to say: Jaime has the hots for FEMINIST ICON Brienne of Tarth.

~Cartoon heart eyes~

Said Coster-Waldau to IGN of the star-crossed pair's reunion in the show's most recent episode:

[You] constantly feel this subtext of a weird fondness and attraction between them that they never act on, and could never act on. It's intriguing. You kind of go, "Why can't you just...?" What I love about the scene last night, the set up is brilliant. When Bronn surprises Pod in front of the tent, he says, "So what do you think? Are they f--king in there? Because I know he wants to f--k her. I'm sure she wants to f--k him. So what do you think?" And then we cut in and you just see these two people standing very stiffly and very correctly and trying to avoid talking about anything really personal, but being very correct.

Because the writers set this scene, the subtext is so clear that they're happy to see each other, but they don't know how to recognize that. The truth is that they've never, you know... Yes, Jaime's been with his sister his whole life and that's the love he knows, and God knows that's a version of it. Brienne, she loved Renly I think, but they would never recognize the thing that there is between them because it's just beyond imagination -- or at least they would never allow themselves to go to that place.

Oh, and there's this, which Coster-Waldau added later:

I think he believes that somehow they must recognize that the other one cares. I'm sure she knows he cares about her. The fact that she tries to give him back the sword Oathkeeper and he kind of says, "It's yours. It's always been yours," the subtext is it's almost like saying, "You keep my heart. It's yours. It's always been yours."

Take that, Tormund.

This child hairstylist is better at doing hair at age 5 than you are as an adult.

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Meet Magnolia. In addition to being named after a better flower than you (sorry, Lily), she's also better at doing hair then you are. Or even if you're some kind of hair wizard (side note: "hairizard" would be a great Pokemon name), she's certainly better at doing hair than you were at her age: five years old.

Her Instagram account is named "Confessions of a Mini Hairstylist," proving that the phrase "confessions of a" has lost any meaning it once had. What does a five-year-old have to confess? That she sleeps in Pull-Ups? Those are diapers for big girls, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. (Actually, the name is just a mini version of her hairstylist mom's account, "Confessions of a Hairstylist.")

Triple flower bun Updo by me. 🌸🌸🌸#confessionsofaminihairstylist

A video posted by 5 Year Old Hairstylist (@confessionsofaminihairstylist) on

And Magnolia isn't just good at doing hair. She's also apparently good at promoting her mother's book.

Yup, totally sounds like an Instagram written by a five-year-old.

10 great movies that had their endings changed to please you even more.

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It takes a lot of work to make movies, including those B-list ones you half pay attention to while eating chocolate in your bed, but any storyteller knows the hardest part is the ending. Viewers don't appreciate that tweaking those endings could've altered the course of a film's trajectory, and its entire meaning. These 10 movies all made major shifts in their conclusions, without which they may not have been the amazing films we all remember today. Except for The Break-Up. No matter which way you look at it's a solid eating-chocolate-in-bed movie.

1. Pretty In Pink

The 1986 classic teen movie first saw Andie ending up with Duckie, her clearly infatuated nerd BFF. Test audiences did not approve of this true love, so the studio went back and had Andie pick total prepster Blane.

2. Clerks

The 1994 classic slacker film at first had a much more explosive ending than Randal telling Dante, "You're closed." Kevin Smith filmed a version that has a random man killing Dante on the job. Smith thankfully decided that his movie didn't need that darkness, so he went with the simpler ending.

Watch the murder of Dante:

3. The Break-Up

At first, Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn's characters decided to stay true to the movie's title, and did not glance lovingly in the street at each other, but went their separate ways with new lovers who looked just like each other. Rumor is that the studio nixed this ending after learning that people wanted Aniston to get the happy ending fans thought she deserved after the tabloid circus that was Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt in 2006.

4. Alien

Ridley Scott's classic 1979 movie was almost quite different in a few ways. Sigourney Weaver initially had no place in the film, because the original script had Ripley as a man. The script was re-written and Weaver finally beat out Meryl Streep for the role.

As filming went on and Scott received more money from Fox, he decided to make things even more groundbreaking/freaky by killing Ripley. The freaky part comes in when the alien, after killing Ripley, recorded a final message in Ripley's log and imitated her voice. Producers convinced Scott to forget this ending, which was great for everyone who ended up making money off the sequels.

5. E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial​

Sorry to spoil things for you, but this is the most outrageous original ending out of all of these: E.T. DIED. Cold-hearted Steven Spielberg ruined the movie for a test audience who had to suffer through E.T. dying in the government facility. Fortunately, the audience hated that ending, and the 1982 film was amended to become the famous death-free tear-jerker it is now.

6. Thelma and Louise

The 1991 female friendship movie that gave a world a glimpse at future star Brad Pitt was originally was a complete downer. Instead of fading out on Thelma and Louise's car, the camera first followed the convertible as it fell into the canyon. That moment followed with Detective Slocumb​ looking into the canyon that Geena Davis and Susan Sarandon's characters drove into. Directly Ridley Scott nixed these last few seconds to the movie could end with the two friends.

Watch the first ending:

7. Fatal Attraction

Viewers should feel very fortunate that they can enjoy the bathtub scene in 1987's Fatal Attraction, as it almost didn't exist. Audiences were first treated to Glenn Close's character committing suicide and Michael Douglas's character being charged with murder. Following that arrest, Douglas's on-screen wife found a tape recording from the rather unstable Alex admitting the suicide, and there was a graphic flashback to the act.

Here's that scene:

8. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid

The 1969 Western with Robert Redford and Paul Newman initially had a much more brutal ending in which viewers watched the two get gunned down by an army. Ultimately, film didn't go the Bonnie and Clyde route and instead finished with a freeze frame on the two lovely gentlemen. Despite this kinder film editing, they certainly did not make it.

9.DodgeBall: A True Underdog Story

The 2004 sports comedy starring Vince Vaughn and Ben Stiller initially had the Average Joes losing the final game, reversing the Hollywood underdog tale. Then the film sold out after test audiences didn't enjoy this more realistic ending, letting the Average Joes win, giving Vaughn's character a lot of money, and forcing Ben Stiller to do his "Milkshake" dance.

Witness the fall of the Average Joes:

10. Pretty Woman

The original incarnation of Pretty Woman was titled $3,000, and it had a much different vibe. According to its breakout star Julia Roberts, $3,000 was written as "a really dark and depressing, horrible, terrible story about two horrible people and my character was this drug addict, a bad-tempered, foulmouthed, ill-humored, poorly educated hooker who had this weeklong experience with a foulmouthed, ill-tempered, bad-humored, very wealthy, handsome but horrible man and it was just a grisly, ugly story about these two people."

In short, Edward and Vivian didn't end up together and $3,000 wasn't the movie teen girls love today.

If Pretty Woman hadn't ended like it did, then how else would young people learn the fairytale side of prostitution?

Article 38

Morning show hosts erect a very sexy, very phallic sand castle before totally losing it.

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On June 9, KCTV Action 3 News posted a YouTube video of what they termed a "Live TV blooper" from their show Morning Blend (those morning talk shows have the best, most insipid names). In the clip, cohosts Mike DiGiacomo and Mary Nelson are doing a segment about a charity sand-shaping event when DiGiacomo accidentally gets a little too creative with his sand castle.

The guest, who's brought some sand-sculpting tools along, tells the hosts, "I've also got a little toy I'd like you to play with, if you like. This is a willysphere, and this makes a perfect circle." He demonstrates, putting a circle at the (oh no) base of the cock tower. It can even make (uh-oh) TWO perfect circles, as DiGiacomo illustrates, using the willysphere to fashion another circle right next to the first one. And voilà—he's created a willy!

DiGiacomo suddenly realizes his placement is maybe not ideal (for a sand castle; for a penis it's 100% ideal) and smooths the sand over, saying "Wow, what'd I just make there?"

Nelson almost hyperventilates with laughter, and they figure that's a pretty good place to end the segment, before anyone can produce any more sand genitals.

This map shows the most common "interests" people list on their resumes by state. No wonder it's so hard to get hired.

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The career site Zippia willingly took on every boss's nightmare and looked through a bunch of resumes for fun: 3,543,017 resumes to be exact. A computer must have been involved. The purpose of this thorough analysis was to determine the most popular keywords people listed on their resumes in the "Additional Interests" section. Zippia divided their research up by state, so you can see how well you fit into your environment/what interests you need to immediately start hating in order to stand out.

The results are simultaneously boring and WTF.

Florida likes "Spanish" which is not surprising, but there's some other strange stuff going on in this section of America.

North Carolina, what is up? As Zippia explained, one reason "Kardashian" kept appearing in so many resumes is completely logical. Some name-dropped the Kardashians because they worked for one part of their empire.

That reasoning helps explain what was going on up North, too.

Much respect, Rhode Island, for that Harry Potter love. Zippia found this mention on one person's resume as they hosted a “Harry Potter Science Night" that involved the "[demonstration of] non-Newtonian fluids and density through fun, interactive activities.” Good times.

Other states surely would've appreciated that event given some of their overlapping interests.

Kansas and Missouri are quite a pair with their rather different interests ("Buddhism," "Redneck").

Two other states that deserve some recognition are New Mexico and Hawaii. New Mexico is into "UFOs," and Hawaii likes "Heroin." Let's hope those cover letters from Hawaii are reading more along the lines of "I've worked in a rehab facility specializing in heroin recovery" and not "I love heroin."


Fan more dedicated than you didn't let oral surgery stand between her and Beyoncé.

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Hold up, they don't love her like she loves her. Chelsey Bunner, a die-hard Beyoncé fan, didn't let wisdom teeth surgery and the open wounds in her mouth stop her from seeing Queen Bey. Bunner got tickets to see the Formation tour, but her mom ruined the magical plan by scheduling Bunner's wisdom teeth surgery for the night before. But she didn't let a simple surgery stop her, instead putting her Love on Top and going to the concert with her post-surgery swag, whether or not she was ready for this jelly.

Quite the countdown.

Had Beyonce known, she would have been impressed.

A photo posted by Beyoncé (@beyonce) on

She came prepared, with ice packs in her bag (swag).

Don't Hurt Yourself!

Now that's dedication to the Formation.

'Modern Family' star thought this was just some random fan who wanted a photo. It was Britney Spears.

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Modern Family star Ed O'Neill stopped by Ellen earlier this week to talk about playing a seven-tentacled octopus in the new Pixar film Finding Dory when the talk-show host brought up an embarrassing encounter he had with one Britney Spears. Apparently, Spears requested a photo with theModern Family star, and though he obliged, he totally just thought she was some random fan and not one of the most famous women in music.​ To hear him talk about it, skip to the 3:05 mark.

Ed, that's Britney, bitch. You know, the outrageously famous singer? Who's been a pop culture staple since the late 90s? The girl whose face has been plastered pretty much everywhere for the past decade and a half? Yeah, that Britney Spears.

Ed O'Neill is such a dad.

Still, whether he knew it was her or not, she still made a good impression, since Britt captioned the photo, "Fancy running into this guy! Such a sweetheart!!" when she tweeted the pic back in March 2015.

O'Neill's 17-year-old daughter Sophia will probably never stop rolling her eyes at him for this one.

Girl gets poison ivy in her eyes. The Internet—and her sister—delights in how hilarious she looks.

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First, 21-year-old Emily Petrozza had to suffer through the pain of a terrible reaction to poison ivy on her eyes. Then, she was publicly humiliated by her loving sister, Lauren, who posted pictures and a video of Emily to Twitter. To truly understand the effect of the plant on Petrozza, you must first see her sans-inflamed eyes. This is her with her 17-year-old sister:

This is Emily after getting attacked by poison ivy.

A little while later, she looked much worse.

Lauren shared these pictures with this important memo.

BuzzFeed spoke with Emily, who explained that she'd been fishing with a friend and taking care of feral cats in her home state of Connecticut. After that, the rash appeared on her arm. Then it migrated like the plague. On Sunday night she went to bed with "little red bumps" on her eyes. Upon waking, Emily was in tears because she caught sight of her face in the mirror. Her eyes had turned into miniature balloons.

Twitter enjoyed Emily's pain.

Others sympathized.

Emily did not appreciate her sister's tweet.

She likely wasn't a fan of this video either.

For goodness' sake, why was she still touching her eyes at that point?

13-year-old standup Lori Mae Hernandez slays 'America's Got Talent' judges with sick Trump burn.

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13-year-old standup comedian Lori Mae Hernandez made her TV debut on Tuesday's episode of America's Got Talent, and it's safe to say this girl is going places (middle school). She immediately impressed the judges with her seasoned, confident delivery, which would be the envy of many working comics three times her age. But it was one political joke she made that truly won them over.

Even little girls are ripping on Trump now. And on his birthday, no less. This election is finally getting fun.

Ava Sambora, spawn of Heather Locklear and Richie Sambora, is back to show off her famous genes in some bikinis.

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There's suddenly been a general recollection on the Internet this year that Heather Locklear and Richie Sambora (who divorced in 2007) have a daughter, Ava Sambora. Ava Sambora has re-entered people's minds because she is now 18 and she wears bikinis.

Ava is nine here, not 18.

Ava was seen recently modeling some suits for the line Baes and Bikinis.

People were impressed with her modeling skills.

Yes, given her family's wealth she likely does have some nice jeans.

When she's not modeling bikinis, Sambora is sharing pictures of herself in bikinis on Instagram.

Baes and Bikinis

A photo posted by Ava Sambora (@avasambora) on

Another one for Baes and Bikinis

A photo posted by Ava Sambora (@avasambora) on

A little behind the scenes from the @baesandbikinis shoot today 💞

A photo posted by Ava Sambora (@avasambora) on

The celeb-spawn wears clothes, too.

Coffee with Pop

A photo posted by Ava Sambora (@avasambora) on

He hit a home run (;

A photo posted by Ava Sambora (@avasambora) on

Happy birthday to my best friend since kindergarten 👼🏼💗

A photo posted by Ava Sambora (@avasambora) on

That last pic is of her at prom, because she's only 18.

Hot mugshot guy's first modeling pics are out and he's still a hot, hot felon.

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Jeremy Meeks, the Hot Felon packing piercing blue eyes and an illegal firearm (the latter resulting in a 27 month prison sentence), was freed from prison and is ready to steal your heart.

#warriors #dubnation #hometeam

A photo posted by JEREMY MEEKS (@jmeeksofficial) on

The hot felon known as Hot Felon (who could have broken out of prison with those sharp, sharp cheekbones) got a modeling contract and manager, and is represented by esteemed agency White Cross Management. Collaborating with a photographer fancier than the Stockton Police Department, Meeks shared his first official headshot, repping the Golden State Warriors, a team as hot as he is.

Headshots fired.

He also shared a glimpse at his body below the chin, which proves that while the criminal justice system is destructive and flawed, it does provide a good workout.

Count down #housearrest #bayarea

A photo posted by JEREMY MEEKS (@jmeeksofficial) on

Welcome back, Hot Felon. Keep killing it (but not so much you end up in jail).

Article 29


Landlords share stories of tenants so awful, you can smell them through the screen.

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You've complained about your landlord. But in the depths ofvariousAskRedditthreads on the Internet, they're complaining about you right back. Hopefully you're not the subject of one of the following rants, because that would mean you're a disgusting, filthy hoarder of your own poop.

Or worse. You're a cat lady.

1. Oldenoughtono isn't sure what's worse: kiddie pools or live chickens.

Buddy of mine owned a 3 story house. Got a call from the 2nd floor tenants that water was coming though his roof. He went to the 3rd floor and when the tenants opened the door he could see one of those blow up swimming pools in the living room. Not the little ones mind you but one of the big 24 inch deep ones. As if this wasn't shocking enough, the tenant had also removed all the kitchen cabinet doors and replaced them with chicken wire and had a dozen chickens living in them.

2. Ayleesha has a similar choice between what's worse: a cat lady or a poop lady?

1. Human. Shit. Everywhere. We had a tenant in a 40 year old apartment complex who was a hoarder or something. This person was evicted for failure to comply with certain provisions of their lease, and when we went to inspect, the smell was unbearable. There was shit in every plumbing fixture. The toilet was full and overflowing, the bathroom sink was full, the bathtub was half full, the kitchen sink... Everywhere. There was a pile of cigarette butts on the kitchen counter, they'd just stub them out on the counter. We couldn't rent that unit for a while.

2. The cat lady This was in a top floor 1 bedroom apartment of about 650 square feet. We got complaints about the smell emanating from this apartment. Upon inspection, we found a sea of cats living there with two people. Dozens of cats. When we called animal control, it took every truck in the city several trips. The final count? 62 cats? I love cats, but that's too much.

62 cats: Too much or too cute? OK yeah, too much.

3. Well yeah, muxman's reasonably not pleased about the "latex-dog poo lasagna."

I've got some good ones for this.

Had a whole house being rented. Evicted tenant. Went to clean up after they left and this was the basement. They had a dog that went in the basement to crap. Instead of cleaning it up they poured latex paint on it to seal in the smell. The dog kept crapping and they kept pouring. A latex-dog poo lasagna filling an entire room. The floor was a mound about 4ft high and 10ft wide, filling the entire basement, of nothing but layers of latex paint and dog crap from several years of them living there. Took air hammers and chisels and weeks of work to clean.

Once we got that done we were able to get the the storage closet in the basement. It was jammed shut from this crap on the floor but the door had a hole in the top. They used this closed off room with the hole as a diaper disposal for their infant. A room about 4ftx4ft filled to the top with years of dirty baby diapers.

4. Here's one with a clearly preferable option. Even though Mchccjg12 probably hates them both.

1. They refused to pay the electric bill, and then after we had their electricity disconnected, they used a long pole to reconnect it.

2. They burned their own house down in a fit of rage

5. This guy's not a landlord, but he knows how they think.

I'm not a landlord but in my lease was an agreement to not have a pool inside the apartment nor could we build a campfire or horde goats in the apartment. To think there is a reason that these specifically are in a lease amazes me.

This should be in the renter's bill of rights.

6. Throwaway1242014 gives a side of advice to go with the entree of concrete drains.

I had a tenant pour concrete down the drains. There was no repair possible. It was literally more cost-effective to demolish, salvage what we could and rebuild. It even got into the septic system and we had to settle with the city for damaging their infrastructure. Biggest nightmare ever. We sued the former tenants, but when you're suing a scumbag, best case scenario, you might get a 1990 Toyota Tercel.

Tenants are pretty decent as a whole, but if you have to evict, it's worth it to just offer them a couple hundred dollars cash to move out while you're there and can watch the whole process.

7. At least Shilpdogg's tenant was probably pretty loaded?

Dude came in with his family. The decided to overload the dishwasher till it broke. Then. We had a guy come into check it and he deduced that he needs to replace a part that they broke. It was only online so he told them to wait and not use the dishwasher. He gets a call later that night and the kitchen is flooded (they were hardwood floors) and he asks the wife why she used the dishwasher, to which she replied "how am I supposed to wash the dishes? With a hose?" There was a deep sink two feet away from the dishwasher. TLDR: bitch flooded the kitchen because she's never hand washed dishes in a sink

8. Tommysmuffins clarifies that rattle can = spray paint.

My last landlord told me about a tenant that painted his motorcycle with a rattle can, in the apartment. Tiny little black dots of paint over every last surface in the apartment. The carpet was the worst part.

Is this frowned upon inside? Oh.

9. Flounder19's story is the reason history is the best subject.

Interned for a building in NYC cleaning out their tenant files. Found a woman on rent control since the sixties who spent a decade mailing trash she found in the hallways to the management

Dear ____,
here's a cigar butt I found by the trash today.

Good times.

10. And Bonesnapcall's story is the reason politics is the worst subject.

I grew up in Washington, DC where my parents rented out our entire basement floor. We had one tenant absolutely living in filth. The smell got so bad we decided to evict them. That was when we learned about DC's Renters Right's laws. First, you have to prove they are not only in violation of their lease, but also that they have not paid you in excess of three months. So if you do that, you have to inform them of your intention to evict. Then, after three months, you can submit your request to the US Marshal Service, they handle evictions for DC. It is an office of six people, for a city of 600,000. So then you have to wait six months for them to process your eviction. In the meantime, your tenant, that has been living rent free for nine months, has completely trashed the space because he knows he is being evicted.

11. Meanwhile, the landlord Turnpikenorth isn't even mad, he's just impressed.

Literally stole the linoleum floors, as well as the kitchen cabinets.

12. Marij13 gives the other cat lady on this list a run for her catnip.

A co-worker of mine evicted a cat lady. They found 20+ the first day and then kept finding more cats for like a week. Every day he'd come in and report on how many more they found. Had to gut the house because of the smell/cat urine soaked into everything.

Be like her.

13. Caluca5's story is not funny. At all. Until the end.

Rented to a tenant that seemed to have his shit together. Well dressed, articulate, owned his own business, and great credit. That façade didn't last too long. 2 months in, multiple noise complaints and police had to show up for various domestic assaults. We evicted him, and he left quietly, but not before he decided to fap off on all of the walls.

14. After all that, Angelofpity's tale is really just adorable.

I had a tenant once who couldn't figure out that the bottom of the shower curtain went inside the tub. Thank your parents kiddies that you aren't wearing your pants on your head, because somehow, some people just never get taught basic life skills.

15. Nachoqueen has a royally messed up story. Please, don't get any ideas. Your landlord doesn't deserve it.

Tenants lived upstairs for 3 months, didn't pay the third month's rent, called in (as me) to cut off my utilities, reported me to Children's Division for child abuse... moved out leaving 18 bags of garbage & reported me to the fire department for the garbage hazard.

15 dads who turned embarrassing their kids into an art form.

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Being a father involves a lot of responsibilities: providing, being a role model, and most important of all: bringing the dad humor. Mastering dad humor starts with a baseline of glorious dad jokes, but also necessitates deliberately embarrassing the crap out of your kids in a hilarious way. To paraphrase the aphorism: Anyone can be a father, but it takes a real man to get their kid to scream, "ohmygahd dad you're EMBARRASSING ME!" And these redditors' dads are true pros.

1. MasticationAddict unfortunately has the one dad that actually wanted to get out of the car.

You think your dad is terrible? I have to say, its my dad wearing tight biker shorts without a cup when he was picking me up from school in 9th grade. He got out the car so he could meet my friends.

2. Most every dad has done what anthonymyers3000's dad did, but how many are so committed to the bit that they keep it up for an hour?

My dad pretended to go to sleep on one of the store model beds at sears. He kept it up for over an hour while me and my sister pretended not to know him.

3. Sadly, Maxakhan's dad is no longer welcome in Milan, New York, or Japan.

My dad picked my sister and her friend up from their middle school dance in his convertible playing I'm Too Sexy.

4. This dad thinks the Frozen soundtrack is embarrassing, but seems to have no idea that saying "Hashtag YOLO" is way worse.

5. Dads love sports, but no dad loves sports quite like foreoki12's dad.

My dad was a terribly embarrassing spectator at our sports events. He wasn't a Randy Marsh, by any means. Instead he just did things like wear a baseball cap at a weird angle to block the sun, or bring a rocking chair to sit in because bleachers were uncomfortable. Once, after a soccer game, he tried to climb the short chain-link fence that separated the bleachers from the field, and got stuck. With his hat at an absurd jaunty angle, of course. I just about died.

6. The father of this deleted user didn't really intend to embarrass anyone, but daddy is still a man, and daddy's got manly needs.

When I was 16 my friends and I came back from the movies early since the movie sucked. Our reward for leaving the shitty movie early? Seeing my naked parents fucking on the stairway as we walk through the door.

7. TheHollowNoise's dad thinks he's hilarious, but might actually just be kinda racist.

Basically whenever we walk by any foreign person, he just starts talking to them in their accent or even worse, what he thinks is their accent. One in particular stands out though, we were in the city and a Jamaican lady walks up to him and says she'll suck his dick for 10 dollars. So my father looks directly at her and says something like "Mon we not makin a ting about it girl!"

8. Send_Your_Nudes_2_Me was embarrassed, but not as much as Mom.

Me and my dad were at a public boat ramp. It was during a break from school so the place was crowded. My dad is trying to get the boat unhooked while its already in the water and the boat just falls over and he lands in the water. He climbs out soaking wet and screams "I'm as wet as your mother!"

9. User autumnx has the one dad in the world with an interest in contemporary culture beyond Longmire.

Anyway, one time in middle school my dad dropped a group of us off at the mall. We were looking to buy the 50 cent CD as it first came out (yep a group of white female pre-teens). Our town is really small and the store we went to (Fye I believe) sold out of it. The employee said some guy bought the last copy but they'll have more tomorrow. So, we leave. My dad comes to pick us up later and as we get in the car and drive off, we hear a 50 cent song. My dad is rapping along and shows us the CD cover. He bought it. For himself. I was mortified and my friends were amazed.​

10. The father of MasterBlaster234, though, seems to have sadly conflated "Gangnam Style" with "Do the Bartman."

My dad just started randomly screaming "Do the Gangnam Style baby!!!" In public, get with the times old man

11. Mindfucker815 has a story that suggests a middle school experience somehow worse than yours.

In 7th grade, my dad was the principal of my middle school. During our awards day at the end of the year he gave me a certificate for having the hottest mom and I had to walk up in front of everyone to get it.

12. This story from PattyCakes1 raises a lot more questions than it answers.

Step dad put me in one of those baby seats on top of a grocery cart then proceded to quickly lock it and walk around the store casually. I was flailing around and screaming like a idiot because i didn't know how to unbuckle it and was so embarrassed to let logic sink in. I was 14 and still very small.

13. Dads be wearing sweaters, and dads be frustratingly shooting video vertically.

14. FoolOfMyself's dad went the gross-out route, but consider the planning that went into this. He had to smuggle the peanut butter outside, wear the right shoes…

My sister had a few of her friends over and they were hanging out on the backyard. My dad gets a big scoop of peanut butter and sticks it on the heel of his sneaker. Walks over to them, "the hell is that on my shoe? Is that dog poop?" Smells it, licks it "Ewwww it is dog poop!" All her friends freak out and my sister is mortified.​

15. It's not the dancing. It's those black socks.

Stanford Rape Judge Aaron Persky removed from a new sexual assault case due to inability to 'be fair.'

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Someone doesn't think Stanford Rape Judge Aaron Persky can be impartial... can you believe it?

In a horrific twist of irony, Stanford Rape Judge Aaron Persky (that's officially his name forever) was assigned to preside over an upcoming preliminary hearing of a male nurse accused of sexually assaulting a woman under anesthesia. That's another sexual assault case where where the victim was unconscious.

Stanford Rapist Brock Turner got only six months in county jail for his crimes, which will be reduced to three for good behavior.

Two in one month? It's almost as if we live in a society where predators think they can sexually assault someone while unconscious and get away with it.

Fortunately, Stanford Rape Judge Aaron Persky was pulled from the docket. As confirmed by BuzzFeed News, Santa Clara County District Attorney Jeffrey Rosen asked for a reassignment because he "questioned the judge’s ability to be fair."

Hand out a ridiculously lenient sentence to a convicted rapist once, shame on you. Hand out a ridiculously lenient sentence to a convicted rapist twice, shame on the legal system.

In a statement regarding the decision, Rosen said:

“This is a rare and carefully considered step for our Office. In the future, we will evaluate each case on its own merits and decide if we should use our legal right to ask for another judge in order to protect public safety and pursue justice."

So, is Stanford Rape Judge Aaron Persky's impartiality going to be judged by the DA on a case by case basis? That's not how impartiality works. Either you is (impartial) or you ain't. And according to to the Santa Clara District Attorney's office and the over one million people who signed the change.org petition to have him removed from the bench, Stanford Rape Judge Aaron Persky ain't.

Of course, having Stanford Rape Judge Aaron Persky's judgment questioned like this is a step in the right direction, and provides at least a modicum of acknowledgement that he was wrong in letting off Stanford Rapist Brock Turner (officially his name forever) so easily.

Too bad for whoever this male nurse is. You know he must have been so stoked to have gotten Stanford Rape Judge Aaron Persky assigned to his case.

Kim Kardashian shares exactly what her corporate handlers let her eat in a day.

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Kim Kardashian is on a mission to be one of those women who sets high standards for moms post-birth and further the notion that weight is of utmost importance. The OG Kardashian has been upfront about her weight loss and desire to weigh the exact same as she did before popping out two kids. Kardashian isn't done talking about this matter—she discussed her weight loss goals and regimen with People.

TheWifeOfPablo

A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

After giving birth to Saint six months ago and feeling like her body was "mush," Kardashian went on the Atkins diet. Atkins is a low-carb diet she is most definitely getting paid to do because it's mentioned a million times in the two People articles on her exercise and diet regimes.

Kardashian explained how she's dropped 60 pounds, which is 12 pounds away from her goal weight of 120, thanks in part to 6 am exercises with a trainer who probably makes more per hour than you do per week.

Right now, Kardashian is focusing on what's made her famous: "My butt and my hips are the last to go, but I'm not stopping!"

#liberated

A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

While it's kind of sad that Kardashian is militantly obsessed with her weight, she said she feels good. "After having two kids, and being able to get in shape and still feel good about myself, I've never felt better. I worked my ass off, I've altered my life and I'm proud of that."

I love you guys! #64mil

A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

People gained exclusive access to Kardashian's diet, which is so strict that it would not be surprising if she has occasionally broken down and dived into a box of Oreos. Kardashian eats about 1500 to 1700 calories per day, which includes three meals and two snacks. Those consist of stuff like Atkins bars and grilled chicken with cauliflower mac and cheese.

My visit to Ernest Hemingway's house in Cuba is on my app today! Link in my bio

A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

To summarize, the secret to looking like Kim Kardashian is to be Kim Kardashian. An exact replication of her diet and exercise will not do the trick.

This guy looks exactly like Jon Snow. Maybe they can team up to defeat Ramsay Bolton?

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The man below, of course, is Jon Snow, the understandably mopey Stark bastard and arguably the closest thing Game of Thrones has to a protagonist:

But the man below is not Kit Harington, the actor who plays Snow. His name is Josiah Martin—and, like Jon Snow, he has a certain affection for canines:

And he knows how to dress when winter is coming:

And he loves pussy:

Let's hope Martin never has to deal with the kind of sh*t Snow has to on a daily basis.

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