Jimmy Kimmel's daughter Jane got an oversized surprise on Christmas Eve thanks to her Aunt and Uncle sending her an 8-foot tall teddy bear. Despite being asked not to, Kimmel's brother and sister-in-law mailed the 2-year-old the "refrigerator sized" stuffed animal that now permanently resides in his Los Angeles home. However, Jimmy Kimmel got the last laugh when he had his giant, cuddly revenge.

"We tried to send a live bear, but the authorities won't allow that, apparently," joked Kimmel after showing his niece and nephew surrounded by five of the giant bears. The picture looks like Goldilocks' fever dream.

In other news, I am totally going to go replace all the furniture in my apartment with giant teddy bears. They just look so squishy.

A Brazilian man with a dad bod and a dad sense of humor saw a roadside traffic sign lying on the side of the road. Then the world stopped, everything snapped into place, and inspiration struck. It was the perfect moment. All signs pointed to dad joke.

Ladies and gentleman, my father

It's from Brazil, but this story transcends language.

According to the Classic Dad's daughter, Fernanda Lizardo, "He loves to make fun of everything. The sign was lying on the side of the road. He raised the plate, positioning it so that the arrow pointed to his belly, and posed."

Early candidate for father of the year right here.

Bernie Sanders wants to make sure everyone remembers that President-elect Donald Trump bragged via tweet in May 2015 about being the only GOP candidate who promised not to touch social security, Medicare, or Medicaid if he was elected (even throwing in an extra-childish, very on brand bit about how how Mike Huckabee "copied" him).

First, Bernie Sanders tweeted about Trump's original tweet.

And then, to the joy of internet jokers everywhere, the 75-year-old Vermont senator actually printed Trump's tweet out on posterboard and displayed it on the Senate floor.

And, of course, it wasn't long before Twitter users started making Bernie jokes and memes. We've gathered some of the funniest ones below.

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Shannen Doherty took a little break from kicking cancer's ass to dance it out on Wednesday. To celebrate nearing the end of her radiation treatment for breast cancer, The Beverly Hills, 90210​shook her groove thang to Pitbull's "Fuego" alongside celebrity trainer, Jäm Malibu.

Radiation is tiring. It builds up within you and sometimes one just struggles to keep their eyes open. You can see how tired I am here but I'm still moving!! Any movement is so good during treatment, not just for the body, but for your mind as well. #cancerslayer

In August 2015, Shannen Doherty revealed she was diagnosed with invasive breast cancer.For the past 18 months, the self-proclaimed cancer slayer has been updating fans on her condition via social media. Doherty has undergone a mastectomy and chemotherapy before starting radiation treatment in November.

Doherty is also using her celebrity status and social media presence to educate people about cancer. She has even uploaded this video of her surgeon expanding the expander in her chest as she talked through the procedure.

Keep dancing and keep slaying, Shannen.

For some inexplicable reason, James Corden and Jim Parsons decided to do a shot-for-shot recreation of the music video for Kansas's famous nihilist anthem, "Dust in the Wind." The cries from the string section and James Corden's very own dulcet tones will have you contemplate your place in the universe.

Jim Parsons's voice isn't bad either. What musical should we get him to star in? The Music Man? We know he can talk real fast. Or he could bring his childlike charm to Into the Woods?

For reference, and to be impressed, here's the original.

Sooner or later, everything gets a remake.

A British mom was "shocked" to learn that one of her 12-year-old daughter's Christmas gifts, a shower gel called Snow Fairy from Lush Cosmetics, made a cheeky reference to shower sex.

"My exact words [upon seeing the label] were 'what the hell?'" said Lesley Hughes, according to the Mirror.

Her daughter "read it and asked me why that was on there. It was the look of disbelief on her face—she said 'why would I invite someone else into my shower with me?'"

The reference in question can be found on the back of the soap, where Lush prints their cheeky instructions.

"HOW TO USE," reads the heading. "If you really don't know how, then we suggest you find someone you really like and invite them into the shower with you to demonstrate."

The joke, of course, is that everyone knows how to use body wash. Also, shower sex.

Hughes reasoned that the line could lead to some sort of sexual coercion.

"I was shocked. This product is clearly aimed at young girls, it is pink and glittery. It's dangerous," said Hughes of soap. "People could use it to persuade kids to do things they should not be doing."

A spokesperson from the cosmetic company responded, saying to the extent people listen closely to the commands given by soap bottles, they also hope they recognize the humor.

"While we take our products and their ingredients seriously, we try not to take ourselves too seriously and like to have humour at the heart of everything we do."

She further explained the joke, "Our humour is very traditionally British— sometimes in the style of seaside postcards and Christmas pantomime, sometimes tongue-in-cheek, often self-deprecating."

"Our customers tend to have an innate understanding of this style of humour. It is never our intention to offend, but as with all humour not everyone will find the same things funny."

She continued that, like many kids' movies, Lush attempts to entertain moms and dads with jokes that (hopefully) go over the heads of anyone too young to hear them.

"As far as the mixed age of our customers and readers is concerned, we take the same line as UK pantomimes and many children's films—where a laugh can be inserted that adults will understand but will go unnoticed by the young and innocent."

Mariah Carey's performance in Times Square on New Year's Eve is becoming the stuff of legend. And of course, there are some jokesters out there who can't resist having some silly fun with it. One such troll is the mascot of the San Antonio Spurs, who took a little jab at Mariah during the game Wednesday night.

Dressed in a sparkly leotard and tights, the Spurs' Coyote mascot recreated Mariah Carey's New Year's Eve meltdown during halftime between the Spurs' game against the Toronto Raptors.

The Coyote experienced "technical difficulties" during its halftime performance, then proceeded to throw a temper tantrum reminiscent of Mariah Carey's Times Square meltdown.

That Coyote is a master in trolling.

Pharrell Williams and Janelle Monae were guests on Thursday's episode of Ellen, promoting their new movie Hidden Figures, which stars Monae along with Taraji P. Henson and Octavia Spencer. The film was produced by Pharrell, who also wrote and recorded music for the soundtrack.

The episode was also supposed to feature Pharrell performing one of the songs from the movie, "I See a Victory," along with gospel singer Kim Burrell, who appears on the soundtrack. However, after a sermon in which Burrell made some very anti-gay remarks surfaced, Ellen decided to cancel the singer's appearance on the show (Pharrell performed a different song instead).

Pharrell and Ellen talked a bit about the statements Burrell made, and why they don't feel that 2017 should be about intolerance and discrimination.

Explaining his view on religious intolerance, Pharrell says,

There’s no space, there's no room for any kind of prejudice in 2017 and moving on. There’s no room. She’s a fantastic singer, I love her, just like I love everybody else, and we all got to get used to that. . . We all have to get used to everyone's differences and understand that this is a big, gigantic, beautiful, colorful world and it only works with inclusion and empathy. It only works that way.

Ellen agreed, saying,

When I say be kind to one another, I feel that. Because as someone who has received a lot of hate and prejudice and discrimination because of who I choose to love, I just don’t understand anyone who has experienced that kind of oppression or anything like that … it only gives me more compassion. It gives me more empathy. I don’t ever want anyone to feel hurt because they are different.

Wednesday on her show,Ellen DeGeneres paid tribute to the late, greatest Carrie Fisher, who made many memorable visits to the set over the years. From giving out Star Wars tickets on the street to dispensing some of her words of wisdom, Fisher and Ellen always had a good time together, which makes for a great time for the audience.

"I'll miss you Carrie. I love you," Ellen signs off, "Be kind to one another."

In case you were wondering, Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban are just as in love as ever. Unfortunately for their two daughters, Faith Margaret and Sunday Rose, this also means that their parents can't keep their hands off each other and need to drop everything and bone once in a while. It also means that they talk about their sex life on radio shows.

In an interview with SiriusXM’s Denise Albert and Melissa Musen Gerstein, Kidman revealed what she tell their kids when the red hot throes of passion take over and she just has to sex with Urban despite their children being around. When the two lovebirds absolutely need to step away from family time to get it on, they simply tell their girls that "mommy and daddy need to have kissy-kissy time."

Yes, you read that correctly. Kissy-kissy time.

Why is this phrase so completely disgusting? Why can't these two wait until after their kids are asleep? Will I ever be able un-hear that phrase? Everything seems so uncertain all of a sudden. I am shook.

Look, I don't have kids, but I do have parents. And they have never, to my knowledge, explicitly excused themselves to go do it while I was left doing my math homework and eating an after school snack (thanks, Mom and Dad!). Still, you got it hand it to Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman. They seem like they are still humping like bunnies after all these years.

Now if you will excuse me, I must go pukey-pukey in the bathroom.

On Wednesday night, Stephen Colbert's Late Show monologue focused on President-elect Donald Trump and his apparent willingness to trust WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange over intelligence from the country of which he is about to be president. If you'll remember, Trump spent the entirety of his campaign warning that the election would be rigged, but now that he's won, he finds the idea of foreign interference unbelievable.

Wikileaks founder Julian Assange asserts that Russia didn't hack the DNC, and Donald Trump is going with that. On January 3, Trump tweeted that "The 'Intelligence' briefing on so-called 'Russian hacking' was delayed until Friday, perhaps more time needed to build a case. Very strange!"

The truth is that the briefing had always been scheduled for Friday. Colbert said,

Yes, I agree—very strange for the future commander in chief to use sarcastic quotations about the intelligence agencies he will soon rely on. Mr. Trump, you know you’re not an outsider anymore shooting spitballs from the sidelines, right? In two weeks you’ll be "president" of the "United States."

Colbert also brought up Donald Trump's accidental follow of the Twitter account Emergency Kittens (@EmrgencyKittens), joking that using kittens to deliver terrifying but real facts to Trump might be useful.

Ashley Gardner, mother of quadruplets (quadruplets!) needed a quick break, and for many moms, the pantry is the only place to hide.

Managing to squeeze out 34 whole seconds of privacy from her four (four!) daughters, and sought refuge in the sweetness of licorice and the catharsis of vlogging.

Gardner and her husband struggled with infertility for eight years before receiving IVF treatment, when she was implanted with two eggs that both split, the chances of which were one and million.

Now the Gardners have two sets of twin girls: Indie, Esme, Scarlett and Evangeline. While we're here, we might as well look at some cute pictures.

Fashion blogger and founder of Something Navy Arielle Noa Charnas was booted from first class on a flight from New York to Los Angeles because her 9-month-old daughter Ruby wouldn't stop crying. On Monday, the mother took to her Instagram to write about getting sent to the back of the Delta plane after first class passengers complained about her crying infant.

On our way to LA a few days ago it was my first time flying with Ruby, I had a screaming crying sleepy baby who was so overwhelmed that she couldn't fall asleep. My husband and I paid for first class so that we'd have the extra space and could lay down with her - once we were boarded I was getting tons of eye rolls and head shakes from fellow passengers on @delta because my baby was crying (as if I could just look at Ruby and say okay now it's time to stop 😂). I tried to ignore the people until 10 minutes passed and a flight attendant came over to me and asked me and my baby to move to the back of the plane (as if the people in the back didn't matter). Give up our seats that we paid for and move. Apparently I was upsetting and getting a lot of complaints from the first class passengers. I started crying because I was so stressed and anxious and instead of the stewardess being helpful and compassionate she instead made the situation worse. I don't know what's right and wrong when it comes to flying with a baby but after telling a few people the story they were in shock. Thoughts? We're headed back to NYC today and we're hoping for a much better experience. ✈️

It's definitely a tricky situation. It's not surprising that people would be annoyed that they have to listen to a wailing baby after dropping some serious dough on tickets, but come on. What is a mother to do? Unfortunately babies don't come with an "off" button. Those first class passengers probably should have put on their complimentary noise-cancelling headphones and let whatever in flight movie they decided to watch drown out baby's cries.

Luckily, Noa Charnas had a much more positive experience flying back to New York on Delta than she did flying to Los Angeles. She ended up getting her tickets refunded as well as an apology from Delta's CEO. Delta also gave each family member $300, and Noa Charnas is planning on donating the money to a good cause.

Just want to give everyone an update: we made it back to beautiful NYC perfectly fine with a smooth experience on @delta - I want to thank everyone for all of your feedback (both negative and positive) and your kind words regarding our flight to LA. I was so shocked to see how many people were able to relate and I'm glad I was able to bring awareness to something that apparently happens on a daily basis. Delta has reached out with their sincerest apologies, refunded our flights, and offered us additional compensation which @bcharnas and I will be donating to @unicef❤️

What do you think about the whole debacle?

Anyone who travels frequently has probably experienced a nightmare flight where small children crying or yelling or just generally being small children have you feeling like this:

But one dad is asking you not to take your frustrations out on the parents of those little ones. Because, as a dad, he can tell you that the meltdowns are even worse for the parents than they are for you.

Elon James White, dad and founder of This Week In Blackness, took to Twitter on Monday after seeing a post on social media complaining about parents who took their kids on airplanes. In four tweets, he summed up why getting angry at parents traveling with small children isn't the answer.

I mean, he's got a point.

White told The Huffington Post that he'd never had someone directly say anything about his child, but he and his wife have heard plenty of stories about people complaining about little ones on airplanes (as we all have).

“My wife and I both try everything in our power to make sure our child isn’t the crying baby because we’ve heard so many people say such awful things about parents and kids on planes,” he said.

“But having tried to calm a 5-month-old down on a plane, seeing the post on social media about how parents need to control their kids really got to me. It implied that parents are just letting kids cry when in all honesty when a kid is crying their parents are the ones who are the most frustrated.”

White's tweets quickly got many understanding responses from parents and non-parents alike. White told The Huffington Post he just hoped that people would realize that "kids are humans" whose actions are sometimes out of their parents' control.

“The last thing parents need when their little ones are upset is the fear or shame that people heap on to them because they are temporarily inconvenienced.”

So next time you're traveling, give the parents with the crying toddler in Row 3 a break, okay?

Today in the "Men Being Disgusting" Department, we have this man from West Virginia who was arrested for following women around an Ohio Walmart and squirting them with semen from a syringe. Lovely!

According to the CBS News, Timothy Blake was charged on December 30 with "pandering obscenity, sexual imposition and two counts of menace by stalking." Not exactly the stuff of a compelling Tinder bio.

It wasn't just a one and done situation, either. Police in Marietta, OH apparently first received a complaint about Blake on November 2. A woman noticed a man she described as "creepy" following her as she shopped in Walmart. At one point, he got very close to her, and she felt something wet hit her lower back and foot (ewwww). She went into the bathroom to wash off the substance she called "sticky," and when she came out, dude was still standing there, waiting for her. All of this is reportedly backed up by surveillance video.

On December 28, creepy Blake and his sticky semen struck again. A woman at the same Walmart called police with a similar complaint, and cops approached Blake a few days later, when they spotted the white pickup truck he used to flee the scene on both occasions.

At first Blake said the substance in the syringe was egg, but after police had it tested, he finally admitted that it was his own semen.

An affidavit obtained by CBS News says that Blake then revealed that he'd used syringes filled with spit, egg, and semen to spray women "on a dozen occasions." He would allegedly masturbate into a syringe (such aim!) in his car or in the Walmart bathroom, and then use that to squirt (ugh) his sperm onto women, aiming for their butts (blerg).

In the affidavit, police wrote, “The defendant stated maybe it was his way of having sex with these women."

Welp, it certainly wasn't consensual, buddy.

"Comic goddess" Kristen Wiig stepped inside a 1964 Volvo to kick off the ninth (!) season of funny billionaire Jerry Seinfeld's web series "Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee."

Seinfeld can come off as a bit out of touch sometimes, like when he's talking about diversity, but he keeps it pretty level here. He does seem shocked that any place anywhere can serve eggs for a mere three dollars, and at one point he berates a saleswoman for telling him he looks good in goofy glasses, but that's all pretty reasonable.

Wiig's general presence inspired a few Seinfeld riffs about hipsters, and the two happily chatted about Wiig and her boyfriend's love of antique vehicles (Seinfeld likes the idea of "two people getting heated up and jumping into bed because of an old Volvo"—a gross phrase that's kind of amusing).

On the Wiig front, the comedian shared the intriguing news that she's currently working on a ukulele album. There's also plenty of generous reminiscing about her old days at the Groundlings and SNLfor any super fans.

Oh and at one point, the duo joked about how edible a man's dog looked while he stood outside the restaurant glass trying to take a photo of them.

For that alone, it's worth a watch. Check out the full episode, here.

Facebook user Gabriela Brandão was shocked to discover that the St. Anthony figurine her great-grandmother prays to daily is not St. Anthony at all. Upon closer inspection, the Brandão realized that the mini-figurine is actually of Elrond, an elf fromLord of the Rings. She uploaded the picture to Facebook with the caption "The funniest discovery of 2016" where it promptly went viral.

St. Anthony, the patron saint for the recovery of lost items, is often prayed to when someone is trying to find something. Elrond, a fictional elf who resides in Middle Earth, is the Lord of Rivendell. They are both very important figures.

Of course, we can't really fault the great grandmother for mixing up the two men. After all, both wear robes, both have some sort of weird crown things around their head (even though St. Anthony's is made of hair), and both play crucial supporting roles in their respective stories.

See! They are totally twins (if you really squint your eyes).

Fisher-Price has previewed a stationary exercise bike for toddlers, because 2017 knows no bounds. And Twitter, reliably, has a lot of opinions. The Smart Cycle costs $149.99, comes with a tablet dock, connects to Apple/Android-TV and will be available in June 2017.

CNN announced the controversial product in a tweet yesterday:

"For parents looking to give toddlers guilt-free screen time, Fisher-Price has this high-tech exercise bike," they wrote.

IMHO companies need to stop pushing the concept of "guilt" on consumers, let alone toddlers. And the thought of a generation of children peddling away like a miniature SoulCycle cultiskind of terrifying. That being said, I don't have kids and don't want to tell other people how to raise theirs.

So I'll let Twitter do that for me.

Some pointed out the obvious:

Some were confused about how to feel.

Others had a dark outlook.

But a few people defended the product, pointing out that not all kids have access to backyards or safe outdoor spaces.

So, is this a sign of the apocalypse? Or a future generation of kids with unbelievable calf muscles? Both?

I guess we'll just have to wait and find out.