By nature of their very job, lawyers are required to be able to place themselves in someone else's shoes in order to effectively convince the court of their client's innocence and integrity. Given the nature of our justice system, and human beings in general, this can look a lot of different ways.
In some cases, lawyers are taking on the mantel of the underdog, tirelessly advocating for justice for the victim of a violent crime, or a falsely accused innocent.
But in other cases, a lawyer is put on a case where they have to represent someone who they ideologically disagree with, someone who is undoubtedly guilty and often without remorse. In these situations, it could be a really difficult to keep your head down and do your job, especially if it feels like a detriment to the safety of society at large.
In a recent Reddit thread, lawyers shared stories from the times they realized their client was an absolute monster, and how they dealt with that accordingly.
1. genfire saw a man return to his BS like a dog to its vomit.
"A lot of years ago I used to work as a solicitors representative (cases go to crown court, barrister deals and I am there for paperwork, additional stuff with client etc). 70 something year old man had been in jail for 15 years for an assault on a child. Solicitor and barrister working on getting him released due to him getting clean reports from just about everyone."
"Guards took him out of jail to a dentist and as he entered the waiting room he saw two children and ran straight at them. Guards stopped him. 3 weeks later at court I was the one that sat him down in a room to explain that no, this isn't a hearing to release you. It is so you can be commited to a mental health secure facility for the rest of your life. He didn't take that well, I shed no tears."
2. gemulikeit saved a senile man from getting robbed.
"Not the client but my managing partner. The client was a senile 90-year-old man. He wanted to sell land worth a little less than a billion dollars to some businessmen. Suffice to say there were many who wanted to take advantage of the situation. One such person, to my dismay, was our managing partner."
"The partner wanted to insert a provision that would have effectively funneled about 60% of the proceeds solely to him. You could see how his eyes gleamed at the mere mention of money. The provision "got lost in the revisions." I was doing the revisions. I'm no longer part of that scummy firm."
3. IntrapersonalSkills worked at a firm that got a woman off a murder charge, and she promptly went back out with a weapon.
"Ianal but a legal assistant. We got a client off of a murder charge.
2 weeks later she was caught with a similar weapon and situation, except this time the guy didn't die."
4. motlbrandon's professor saw it all.
"My general psychology professor worked for the state of Arkansas assessing criminals to see if they would qualify as criminally insane. He told us a story one time about a guy who would get glass shards and hide them underneath his skin-presumably to use at a more opportune time. He said his interview with the guy made the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end"
5. SmallTownDA met a woman with a truly twisted worldview.
"I'm on the other side, but I've got a defendant who went to prison for starving three adopted children to the point that they needed weeks of hospitalization, then got out of prison and married a guy with children so that she could start starving them, too. Listening to her interview where she attempts to justify what she did to both sets of kids disturbed me more than any of the murder cases I've worked on."
"She did nothing wrong, she was just trying to help them be healthy and beautiful. She felt bad for the first set of kids because they needed her, etc. It wasn't my case, but I've seen the pictures. The first set of kids looked like holocaust survivors. They were 4-5 and she had them completely brainwashed to think only she would ever love them."
6. hamonsterville had a massively creepy client.
"We had a client try and enforce a post-employment restraint against a 19 year old receptionist after she quit and started working for a competitor. The reason? He wanted to "make her life hell" because she wouldn't sleep with him, a creepy 57 year old man. Him trying to sleep with her was the reason she quit. Unsurprisingly he didn't take our advice to discontinue his claim and so we ended up sending him elsewhere."
7. chlorinesmellsgood had a client who tried to monetize her baby.
"She tried to sell her baby. I found out during a hearing, in front of the judge."
8. ______fuck______ had to listen to their client nearly kill someone on a recording.
"I listened to a 911 call where the victim's throat was slit while on the call by our client. I will never forget her gurgling and sounding like she was dying (somehow she ultimately lived through this) saying, "He killed me, he killed me."
9. Snake_Manhauser's teacher left law because of a traumatic case.
"Oh, I can share a good story. I had a teacher in high school who was a former lawyer. We always asked him why gave up his practice to start teaching. He finally caved and explained that his last case was the defense of three people. Apparently there had been a fourth. It was two couples, who in the act of a drunken, drugged out orgy, decided to kill, partially eat, and dismember one of the women."
"I guess it seemed like a good idea at the time. As a lawyer, he said it was pretty open and shut, but he had to get his clients the best result possible, and he was exposed to all the horrid details, the pictures, and their reasoning. My teacher had such a far off look when he explained it that we could see it really got to him."
10. JuniusPhilaenus doesn't trust their own clients.
"I’ll go ahead and say it. When I practiced family law and criminal defense, I trusted and believed my criminal defense clients 100x more than my divorce/custody clients. The worst monsters are the people who manipulate minor children for custody reasons. Fuck them. Luckily I’m out of that area of law, hopefully for good."
11. Elfanara's mom quit after a horrific case.
"My mom is a lawyer. This is the story about how she quit being a public defender.
When you are a public defender you don't get to choose your cases. She got assigned a young man who, with the help of his girlfriend, had gotten a kitten from a "free to a good home" ad in the paper. They then brought it home and gave it to their dog as a chew toy. I think they also filmed it."
"So yeah. She said she needed a shower after every meeting with him. Canceled her PD contract after the case concluded."
12. sethschraier's client literally disowned their autistic son.
"Had a divorce client, husband and father, who disowned his autistic son, tried to argue that he should get all of his wife's retirement having not worked for 12 years, contacted me during the height of hurricane Sandy (he was in the Bronx and me in Manhattan) saying he wanted to hold his wife in contempt for not paying him that day while the storm slammed NYC, told me I was making a huge mistake getting married (my wedding date was November 3rd, 4 days after Sandy) saying that I was going to be miserable and regret it.... I could go on."
"But, the worst was when, several months later, since his divorce was taking a long time, he sent death threat letters to myself and my wife saying that he had hired an "executor" to kill the two of us if his divorce wasn't finalized in 60 days. Called the police and they said he left his premises one day earlier. I heard nothing from him until February 2014 when he emailed me saying he needed a winter coat from his wife and could I help get it for him. Ironically, the divorce didn't have to be completed because he killed himself before the judge signed the judgment of divorce."
"tl;dr: Miserable guy who wanted to spread his misery, and crossed the line when he threatened to kill my wife."
"Edit : for something a little lighter, this Memorial day weekend reminds me of not my worst client, but definitely my dumbest. I was representing her on a child custody and child support matter. She was calling me on Memorial day saying she really needed to speak to me. I called her back and asked if it was urgent since it was Memorial day and all. She said: "oh, I didn't think that Jews celebrated Memorial day, so I thought you were going to be available."
"Edit 2: because so many people have pointed it out, I have now put the word executor in quotes because that was his word and not mine. Also, since people have questioned it, my user name is also the name of my firm."
13. Legit_a_Mint had a client who followed a terrible impulse.
"I've done a lot of prison legal aid, and I could tell stories about child molesters that would turn you green, but instead I'll turn you green a different way."
"I had a kid (17) who was mildly cognitively disabled, due to brain trauma he sustained at the hands of his birth parents, who ended up with a really wonderful foster care family and thrived."
"He was a popular kid in school, good athlete, got a girlfriend and invited her to meet up and be teenagers one night in a corn silo - which I guess is a thing that country kids do? I don't know, this all comes from the pre-sentence investigation report I read before taking his case, but this girl met him at the silo and they were hanging out inside."
"By his account, they were having a nice time and he was really enjoying himself, then for no particular reason, he picked up a 2x4 and bashed her skull in. He then used a combination of very crude farm implements (shovels, hoes) to chop her body up and bury it in the corn and went home like nothing had happened.
Hey, you asked."
14. quirksnglasses had a horrifying first week on the job.
"The first week I started at my current criminal defense firm I was tasked with cataloging discovery from our client's phone."
"The phone had multiple (talking around 4,000) videos, photos, text exchanges with women under 16 (though not all of the girls' ages were confirmed most, if not all, were under the legal age of consent and many were barely pubescent) naked and being prostituted over 1 year. He would lure these girls in exchange for drugs."
"Nothing felt totally bizarre until I came across one video where he was clearly forcing himself upon a literal child who was so high on benzodiazepines (not willingly but rather forced) and choking her in the process. When our firm confronted him, he said he was in love with her and that's why he did it."
"He would also take these girls to hotels and make them have sex with one another while he taped, but nothing beat what I said above.
Pretty horrifying stuff for my first week on the job."
15. timberdown1 had a truly remorse free client.
"I had a client who was accused of domestic violence. Essentially he threw his girlfriend out of a second story window. Now he’s got a terrible history but so do a lot of my clients and his attitude is a little entitled (also typical). But he also knows the deal and wants a plea deal. So I’m not really prepared when he absolutely refuses the no jail offer from the state (keep in mind there were like 5 witnesses). Why? Because they wanted him to pay for her medical bills. Ok, an asshole but whatever not the worst."
"What did it was his counteroffer.
“I ain’t paying that bitchs bills. Tell them I’ll pay for the window.”
Prosecutor was not happy."
16. hippychk promptly left family law.
"The first and last family law case was assigned to me as a first year associate. My client broke his wife’s jaw, and said if they were home in Russia he would have killed her because he could pay his way out of prison there."
17. BeepisBlaster saw a beautiful display of karma.
"My SO's mother, L, was abusive. She frequently hit her husband, was a compulsive liar, and just generally made her family miserable. When they were settling the divorce, the judge initially deemed a testimony from the kids (my SO and her brother) unnecessary, probably because they were minors at the time and testifying against one of their parents would be hard on them, to say the least. However, the lawyer representing L was really insistent that they testify."
"Well it must've been a shock to the lawyer to suddenly have two more witnesses with dozens of accounts of driving under the influence, domestic violence, ect ect. We figured L must've lied to her lawyer about some significant details because they were completely caught off guard and more than a little angry after the testimony. We like to believe it helped solidify some of the criminal charges placed against her. It was a nice bit of karma after years and years of gaslighting and false rumors, that her own lies got her caught."
18. c_c_c__combobreaker defended a client who sunk their own ship.
"Defended my client in a lawsuit who defrauded his business partners. Evidence was already overwhelming that my client was liable. Client made matters worse by fabricating evidence and presenting it in court. He got called out on it by his dad’s attorney who had the same evidence. It tanked my client’s case."
"My client continued lying to me despite the overwhelming evidence showing he fabricated evidence. He lost, big. In addition to a large judgment, he got hit with several felonies for fabricating evidence. Also, the business partners my client screwed over were his dad and brother."
19. sweetalkersweetalker's post includes a trigger warning.
"Don't read this unless you have a strong stomach.
Attorney's wife here. I used to help him file away evidence and reports.
Came across a file with video. Curiosity got the better of me, especially when husband told me NOT to watch it."
"File gives this story: Woman was at boyfriend's trailer out in the middle of nowhere, got pissed off at boyfriend, so smacked him in the head with a metal bat and went on her merry way home."
"Boyfriend is apparently not a pleasant person and nobody really misses him or looks for him. He is fired from work in absentia. On day 7 boyfriend's neighbor finally stops by, hears hoarse screaming and calls police."
"That's where the video came from. Day 7. One of the cops was wearing a camera on his uniform. It shows him and his partner going through the house, finding dogshit all over the floor. Boyfriend's two Rotweillers, who were also in the house, went without food for about 6 days before they started eating bits and pieces of him. The camera shows the moment the cop found the body on its side, rolled it over... AND HE'S BLINKING. Eyes open. With most of his face gone."
"The woman didn't even bother to let thr damn dogs out before she left.
I do not help file cases anymore"
20. AZORxAHAI's client was a straight up Dexter.
"Not a lawyer, but work for a law firm as an Investigator."
"One of our clients stabbed an ex-lover multiple times over $100. Perp then ran out of the house all bloody. Neighbor and her teenage daughter see him covered in blood and rush inside to see if they can help while they call 9/11. Victim is still alive. On the 9/11 call the daughter made, you can hear the mom singing amazing grace while she tried to stop the bleeding. You can also hear the victim, with a stab wound in her neck, gurgling on blood while she tries to sing along."
"The EMTs arrived in under 3 minutes, but it took the police 19 minutes from the call to show up to clear the scene for them. She lived for 17 minutes. I saw the photos of the scene with the body still in place. It looked like a scene straight from Dexter."