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25 Memes That Will Only Be Funny If You're Over 25.

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"As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and then I can't remember the other two."

-Sir Norman Wisdom

Getting older sucks. Your memory gets weaker, your back pain gets stronger, and your hangovers last longer. It seems like all you do is pay bills and complain about being tired. At least you're not alone. These memes hilariously nail the struggle of adulting.

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15 people share paranormal experiences that made them believe in ghosts.

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For some people, the concept of ghost stories brings up a whole slew of memories and unexplainable events, and for skeptics, every spiritual experience is easily explained away. Regardless of where you fall on the belief spectrum, hearing people's bizarre experiences with the unexplained can be as satisfying as a top tier episode of X Files, except with sadly less Gillian Anderson.

Sometimes, the possibility of the paranormal presents itself through unexplainable sounds, moving objects or shadowy figures in your space, other times, there is a ghost with a name and consistent habits hanging around your life

In a recent Reddit thread, people shared their most haunting experiences with the paranormal, and these may inspire you to close all the curtains.

1. Deitaphobia had a terrifying first night at the apartment.

"First night in my first apartment. Didn't have a bed so I slept on the couch in the living room. Had a nightmare that someone with a knife was going down the hallway. Just as they got to the living room door, I woke up. I jumped in my car, spent one more night at my parent's."

"Two months later, my roommate falls asleep on the same couch. Next morning he tells me about a dream he had about a guy coming down the hall with a knife, just as he got to the door, my roommate woke up."

"Few months later a friend asks if he can crash for a night. Sure, he can sleep on the couch. Next morning he says he had a weird dream. I said, 'Guy coming down the hall with a knife?' My roommate added, 'You woke up just as he got to the door?' Dude went palest shade of white I ever seen."

2. Tato7069 worked at a haunted hotel.

"I used to work at a "haunted" hotel at the front desk. There was a room behind the front desk where you could sit when it was late and no one was in the lobby. There was a TV with the security cameras including one on the front desk so you could see if anyone was out there. You could see the whole front desk, including the classic bell that people ring for service."

"A coworker and I were sitting in the back room, no one up front, and the bell rang. No one, NO ONE was out there. Over the next hour the bell rang 6 or 7 times, but only when we were in the back. I don't believe in ghosts, but fuck. This was a nice 4 diamond old hotel that had huge ball rooms and dining rooms that I had to walk through late at night when I was alone. When I worked overnights after that as the only employee in the hotel, I would get freaked out, but never really saw anything else "supernatural.""

3. -3rd_STAR- is unsure who the man was.

"I've had many experiences since I was a kid, the one that freaked me out the most though actually happened a few months ago."

"I'm only 16, I don't like sleeping in my room so I sleep on the couch in the living room(my choice and it's actually really comfy). I also suffer from insomnia and have trouble staying asleep. This being said in normally awake when my dad gets up for work at 4 in the morning and will wish him a good day at work and such. I was trying to sleep but I woke up. Having gone through this many times I just kept my eyes shut. Then I felt something that felt like a leg lean against the side of the couch and hover over me, and then I heard heavy and low breathing."

"It was so loud and sounded like a man so I naturally assumed it was my dad. Since I thought he was trying to check if j was awake i whipped around to try and to scare him but nothing was there. I was so confused that i kinda just sat there for a few moments thinking about what just happened."

4. booksandrats was haunted by a regular.

"I was working counter late at night at Tim Hortons. I heard an older lady set down her china mug and say "Thanks dear!". Turned around and there was no one in the store. I'm okay with a regular dead customer having one last cup."

5. sendmeabook is haunted by a woman in a blue dress.

"Long story short, multiple people who are not friends with one another have been in my house and seen a woman in a blue dress and then told me about it later. I don't tell anyone else about it (not even my husband) because it doesn't bother anything. No big deal right? Any who, I myself have seen her twice."

"The first time I woke up in the middle of the night and saw her leaning over the baby's crib. I immediately sat up and she just faded away. I felt crazy because I didn't know anyone else had seen her at the time."

"The next day I went to Walmart and some lady walks by me and says, "She likes the baby". I stop and ask what she said and she says, "The woman, in your house. She likes the baby." Low-key peed my pants and ran home."

6. celtictamuril69's mother's ghost helped her cope with death.

"My mother passed when I was 22. It was an accident and a shock. My husband and I went 3 states away to stay at her house for a bit to pack things up and settle her estate. I have always had really bad problems with my sinuses. Well the stress and everything got me sick and I had a horrible sinus infection. I had medicine and I was on the couch crying after looking everywhere for it. My husband was sitting next to me holding me."

"Then we looked over on the table where the bible was opened and the meds where sitting on the bible. The bible had been there earlier..closed. I remember sitting it there myself. My husband started freaking out because on the page it was opened to a verse was underlined. It was the only one in the whole book underlined. It said..and the grieving shall be comforted. I usually would not put any credence in this. I was sick and a mess. My husband was not. He is a very level headed person when it comes to things like this. Also quite a few other things happened for a while after that. I like to think my mother was trying to help me cope. I really hope she finally found peace...I did."

7. awkwardviolinist127 was haunted by a painting.

"I’m convinced the house I lived in during my freshman year of college was haunted. I also swear that all of this is 100% true. I don’t talk about it because it sounds ridiculous but it happened and I can’t explain it. The house was 120 years old. My room had a door to the attic that I kept locked. I had 4 other roommates who all swear they weren’t fucking with me."

"I was laying in bed one day and I heard a super loud crash behind the door of the attic. I grabbed my big male room mate and we opened the door together. At the bottom of the steps (there were 6 awkwardly shallow steps leading up to a bunch of that pink foam stuff and your typical attic) there was an old painting of some lady. We were creeped the fuck out. Nobody had ever seen the painting before (let alone gone into the creepy attic)."

"We put the painting in the corner of the attic where it COULD NOT fall and didn’t think about it again. A few months later I heard the same crash. I figured I dreamed or imagined it. Again, I opened the door and found the painting sitting there. This time I moved the painting into the basement. There were some shelves and I just threw it in the back of the top shelf. A couple more months went by. Yet again, late one night, I heard the crash from behind the attic door. I thought to myself “no fucking way”.

"Grabbed my roommate again and opened the door. THERE IT FUCKING WAS. That god damn painting was sitting at the bottom of the steps again. I don’t understand how. I kept the door to my room locked as well as the door to the attic. My roommates couldn’t have gotten in there to play a prank. I truly don’t understand it."

"After the third time we took the painting out to the fire pit and burned it. Thankfully, all the creepy shit stopped there. I moved the fuck out of that house as soon as the lease was up. I can’t explain what happened I just know it was creepy as hell and you could not convince me to go back there."

8. cheeseguy3412 has a Bob problem.

"I live in a house from the 1950s - no one has died in it that I know of - my parents bought it in the 70s when they got married - that said, weird things happen occasionally. About 5 or 6 times a year, every door shakes in its frame, as if someone had grabbed the handle and was pulling / pushing as hard as they could manage, even cracking the doorframe once or twice. We have named whatever is doing this 'Bob' - anything weird that happens is automatically Bob's fault."

"Well, in 2016, my younger sister got married - she moved across the country, so it wasn't a local event. I couldn't take a week off of work to attend, and our dog was in poor health... so I stayed home alone. More weird shit happened that week than any other I can recall - doors shaking, faucets turning themselves on and off, etc."

"The most notable thing, however, was when Bob apparently decided to help. I was out of soda / drinks in general upstairs, and my family keeps most of the spare in our basement. Given all the weird shit that was going on, I wasn't about to go downstairs - I was browsing pizza delivery menus, when I heard a rather loud thump. I grabbed a baseball bat, left my bedroom... and the door to the basement was hanging open, and there was 3 twenty-four packs of soda on the kitchen table. That was a bit too much for me, so I decided to search the house. No one in any bedroom, closet, OR the basement (Yes, I checked. Nothing weird going on down there, and I took my phone / had a finger hovering over the call button to dial 911 just in case a burglar had decided he wanted me to have some Diet Mountain Dew.)"

"All the doors were still locked, the windows were secure, and I found no one - so I just called out "Thanks Bob!" and went back upstairs. I checked our carbon monoxide detectors as well, just in case... but still nothing.

Thankfully, the remainder of the week was uneventful."

9. knivadollar's son got an eerie message from their stuffed animal.

"When my son was about 3.5 years old we were driving home at night with him and his 7 year old brother in the back seat. As we approached an area of the road across from my older son’s former babysitter’s house my younger son clearly blurted out the name “Ashley”. Ashley was the name of the babysitter and she had died the year before in a car accident."

"My younger son had never met her and neither son knew that she lived nearby because she always drove to our home to babysit. When I asked my younger son what he said he repeated the name Ashley, and when I asked him why he said that he said “Raven” told him to. Raven was his favorite stuffed animal. My wife and I were stunned and can not explain what happened."

10. mxmnull has a work ghost.

"I work nights at a hotel. I was setting up coffee one morning a few years back, and I see someone very tall in the kitchen. We make eye contact. Dude's wearing an olive green jacket and a pair of jeans. After a second, he lifts his legs at the knees and floats out the door."

"Now, if I were just seeing things, I'd have panicked. I've hallucinated from exhaustion, and the shit I see scares me. This was there. This was real. It must be a guest or something in an employee area. This has happened a couple times. I take off running to catch this guy and tell him he is not permitted back there."

"No one is there, because of course not. The back is empty. I am alone. I was still convinced for several minutes that this guy was just hiding from me and he'd have to come out and I'd be able to talk to him. Almost a full 5 minutes elapsed before I realized I was literally chasing a ghost."

11. Bluekingbrand420 has a guardian spirit guy.

"I have been saved from death 8 times by a spirit guy wearing a bowler hat.

Each time has been different, but I am not the only one who has seen him. -He has woken up my father and told him to check the garage. My father found me seizing and choking. -I fell asleep while driving. He turned the car sharply before we went off into a river. He also shook me awake before my two friends in the back seat, both asked who I had picked up. Those are the two times others have seen him."

12. Kazmodeous shares a space with a ghost named Abigail.

"My house used to be the largest on the lot before our town expanded. It was the largest because it was a funeral home. They sealed off the room with plaster walls where they would prepare the bodies though, underneath the carpet in my parent's room is a hatch too. I've seen plenty of things, heard plenty of things and friends or family have said things I have seen."

"We have a spirit, ghost, whichever you wanna call it that lives here named Abigail. She's a trickster, she likes to hide things, move things, open doors sometimes or tease our dogs. Whenever my aunt comes to visit with her family small items tend to go missing. Items like her toothbrush that she set by the sink two minutes ago."

"The things here, and there are a few, aren't as active anymore. Or maybe I don't see them or notice them much."

13. ObamasRetirementPlan's sister had a clumsy ghost.

"At my sisters old apartment you could see into the kitchen from the living room. The kitchen cabinets would open and close and her dog would immediately start to bark. One night we were watching a movie and we heard something stumble and hit the ground in her kitchen and the dog didn’t even seem to care. I’m pretty sure we heard a ghost trip and eat shit on her kitchen floor."

14. twoPBandJSandwiches heard scissors every night.

"When I was around 11 years old, i heard scissors snipping coming from my parents bathroom, which was next to my bedroom. This happened every night from around 1 to around 1:30 every night. after about three months it stopped, and the dream i had that night was about a witch looking thing dragging its nails against my back and the next morning my back was covered in scabs that looked like someone scratching my back."

15. lil_Big_G grew up with a friendly child ghost.

"I grew up in a haunted house. it's never scary though, just a bit unnerving sometimes when you realize what is going on."

"Firstly, my house isn't some old colonial with an estranged who Husband returned home after the war of 1812 and slaughtered his family, or any of that nonsense. It was built in 1992. People always ask if my house is super old when they hear it's haunted, I really don't understand why people think houses have had to have deaths, or be old to be haunted. Like why the fuck is that a thing? Like we know why ghosts exist. I have my own theories."

"Now, I could give you all sorts of stories as to what I've seen. But it's typical shit, voices, people talking when no one is home and the t.vs are off, seeing actual physical ghosts etc. But instead I'll give you my two most solid pieces of evidence as to why I know it is real."

"First piece: Summer of 2004, me and my buddy are jamming in my room, house is empty. This was before everyone had a cellphone so he asked for our phone to call his girlfriend, I tell him to go to the back bedroom, my little brothers, and use his. About 30 seconds later he comes back nonchalant, we jam out a bit more and go for a smoke."

"As we are smoking I ask him if he got through to his girlfriend (I think she was coming to pick us up) he says "Nah, your brothers friend was in there and I didn't want to make it all awkward." I ask what the fuck he is talking about, he tells me there was some girl sitting on my brothers bed facing the wall. I didn't bother telling him what he really saw until later, as not to freak him out."

"Then about two years ago I decide to ask my brother about any paranormal shit in the house, now this is without me ever saying a peep to him about my own experiences. For reference, the most common occurrence was a little girl, in the back room, looking away from you, during the afternoon. The conversation basically went."

"Me: Have you seen any ghost shit in our house before

Him: Oh yeah, it's never scary though.

Me: Uh, what do you see?

Him: Mostly a girl

Me: Describe her"

"Him: I have honestly never seen her face, she is always turned away

Me: .....where did you see her?

Him: In my old room, only during the day.

Something about that just chilled me, him describing it exactly as I have seen it."

"A week ago actually my Mom admitted to me that it is, she is one of the most skeptical people I have met. I was in her kitchen in the early morning, she suddenly stops what she is doing, turns off the radio and asks if I hear noises upstairs, I jokingly say its the ghosts (I used to freak out all the time as a child about it to her) she just looks at me and says "it's never really scary though". We sat around for a moment listening to the bangs, and finished eating breakfast. Honestly, what I wonder the most is why the first thing we all say is that it isn't scary."

Groomsman ditches wedding after groom demands he cut his long hair off for photos.

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We've all heard of bridezillas, but brides don't have a monopoly on wedding-related entitlement. Planning a wedding seems to bring out the worst in a lot of people, regardless of gender.

A would-be-groomsman recently shared his story on Reddit about an entitled groom who demanded that he cut off his long hair for the wedding or else he'll be kicked out of the wedding party.

The long-haired groomsman says that he and the groom have been friends for a long time and he was "incredibly honored" to be groomsman in his wedding. He writes:

I’m a guy who has had long hair for a very long time. No one is shocked by this or finds it offensive and I always tie it back and look respectable in photos.

One of my oldest friends recently got engaged and asked me to be a groomsman. I was incredibly honored and would absolutely love to be in that role as I’ve never done it for anyone else and most likely won’t get the chance again.

But the groom revealed his groomzilla side when he asked his friend to cut off his long hair, claiming it would "look weird" in photos alongside the bridesmaids.

The groomsman was "blown away" and said there was "no way" he'd cut off his hair for the wedding:

Recently however he came to me and said he wants me to cut my hair because he doesn’t want the wedding photos to look weird if I have long hair along with the other bridesmaids. I was completely blown away by this and told them that there’s no way that would be happening and this is just the way I am, he knows this.

The groomzilla was persistent, and threatened to kick his friend out of the wedding party if he wouldn't comply with his wishes, arguing he can "always just grow his hair back."

Still he persisted and said that if I’m unable to fulfill this request then I won’t be able to be a groomsman anymore. My other friends are telling me that I should’ve done this for him as it’s a once in a lifetime event and I can always just grow my hair back.

But the groomsman says his long hair, which he's had for over 15 years, is "basically his identity" and that cutting it off would make him feel "uncomfortable."

So he has decided to ditch the wedding instead since he "won't feel welcome."

I’ve had long hair for as long as I can remember, over 15 years and it has always basically been my identity. I have no idea what I would look like and don’t want to have to look back at photos from this wedding where I felt uncomfortable. I’ve decided I won’t be going to the wedding as I don’t feel welcome.

Am I the a**hole?

He asked Reddit: am I the a**hole?

Commenters concluded, nope. This guy is not the a**hole here. His friend is.

n0may0 writes:

NTA f*ck that! what a sh*tty friend

And yabadabadoo80 agrees, writing:

I couldn't agree with you more. There seems to be an obsession with this, mostly in American weddings. Each person is a human being, not a prop. If you want everyone to look the same get some blowup dolls and leave the normal people out of it.

megadee516 says:

NTA. When you ask someone to stand up in your wedding you are asking them as they are.

And many people are calling this groom the G-word:

Says TLynn7:

NTA. Sounds like a groomzilla.

Seems like he definitely made the right decision. This guy and his hair follicles deserve better.

15 people who escaped toxic relationships share what happened and how they got out.

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Leaving a toxic relationship can be incredibly difficult for a multitude of reasons. First off, abusive and toxic people are master manipulators who try love bomb and get in your head before you can easily leave the situation. Secondly, if a partner is full-on physically abusive, ending a relationship can pose a greater threat to your safety than staying (although it's a catch-22 since neither is safe).

Since abusers tend to be master charmers at first, the switch from a seemingly smitten lover to a deeply broken and dangerous partner can be swift and jarring. In many cases, the red flags are difficult to spot if you haven't lived through it.

In a recent Reddit thread, people who have escaped toxic relationships shared when it went from roses to restraining order, and the huge steps it takes to safeguard against a toxic ex.

1. TheDevilsAdvokaat saw his fiance's true colors when she came back from vacation pregnant.

"We were actually engaged to be married. Then she went on holidays without me and came back pregnant. She then told me "you have never done anything to prove you really love me...accept this baby and help me raise it to prove it"

"I declined and asked her to leave the home that I paid for (and that was in my name). She refused. So I made arrangements, canceled my lease, then left and told her there were 4 days left on the lease (I think) She wailed "But what am I supposed to do? I don't have a job!"

2. User1539's downhill slope with their ex began with a lie.

"I graduated. She wanted to transfer schools. So, we moved to a college town where she told me she'd been accepted as a transfer. Turns out she hadn't been accepted, and when she applied, was not accepted. She got a job at Walmart while trying to figure out her next move."

"After about 2 months she decides we should move to Pittsburgh. She's convinced this will solve all her problems and make her happy ... except we're in a recession and I just got my first good job. I don't want to move."

"She became abusive. I didn't want to go home. She was constantly negative and on the edge of a screaming fight. I was just avoiding her at the end."

"We were together 4 years before that, and she was always moody but not abusive. Six months of that, and she went to her home town to take a semester at a local school and stay with her parents. I called her two weeks later and told her not to come back. It had been like a weight was lifted from me, and I never wanted to see her again."

3. ForitfiedFerret's relationship went from nice to nightmare very quickly.

"We met online. We both had video games in common and hit it off. Fast forward 2 years and we get engaged. All was well. Until he started getting abusive toward me and our pets. I felt stuck because I could t afford to live on my own. Then he went on a business trip and I found child porn on a hidden flash drive. Turned it in, he got arrested. Turns out he was also hiring prostitutes and stuff. He’s in prison and it’s illegal for him to contact me."

4. ChocolateSmoovie's ex beat her own mother.

"After being beat down mentally from her, I started suffering from erectile dysfunction at 22 years of age. Eventually I mustered the courage to leave her. She quickly moved on to someone else (who would later become her husband) and called me every week to basically rub it in. Saying how much better he was than me. How much bigger he was that me, etc. etc."

"I moved out of state. Changed my number. Never heard from her again. She called my parents and even showed up at their home, but they told her to go away. About 10 years later my friend ran into an old friend of hers. Apparently my ex got arrested for beating her own mother. Got out of jail, and beat her husband, then tried to take their kids from him. She was arrested again, and later released. Guess I dodged a huge bullet there."

5. lawn_and_order's ex asked her to buy him a gun.

"I was young, dumb, and thought I was in love and ignored many red flags. As he got more comfortable around me he let his crazy out. Someone stole his cell phone and he asked me to purchase a shotgun for him so he could go shoot the person who did it. It took me another year and a half to leave. I did try breaking up with him but he told me that if I ever tried to break up with him again he'd kill everyone I love and then himself so I'd know what it was like to be alone. That relationship ended in an order of protection against domestic violence. He was nuts."

6. knotsophia's long distance relationship escalated quickly.

"We were in a long distance relationship for over 3 years and eventually it started to fizzle, she’d tell me to move to the states and drop my college degree, my family and my animals to live as an illegal immigrant and I could just do whatever odd jobs I could find just to be with her, I told her I needed to wait, she’d get very upset every time I went out with friends and would bombard my facebook wall with random crap and send me private messages with passive aggressive insults and threats of suicide."

"I broke it off with her and moved on, but she kept messaging me asking to be friends, I tried but she’d randomly blow up at me insulting me for ruining her life by making her think she could be loved, I told her she did deserve love and she’d get even more upset, we couldn’t talk at all. Last year she messaged me yet again (we broke up in 2013) telling me that I had a legal obligation to marry her since I said I would 5 years ago and therefore she expected me to just fly up there and fulfill my obligation to her. Had to block her."

"Edit: Sorry I don’t think I explained myself properly, it wasn’t an exclusively online relationship, we did see each other, I would travel up there twice a year whenever I had vacations from uni and spend about 2 months with her, which were always great, she’d just get incredibly possessive and insecure when we were apart because my social life started to blossom down here and she was scared I’d meet someone else. Once I stayed for 6 months until the very last day of my visa."

7. Gala33's ex pulled a huge bait-and-switch.

"I was dating a guy who was very sweet in the beginning. After about six months he got possessive. He didn't trust me. An example of this was one night I told him I was meeting a friend I used to work with at a bar a block away. We lived in a safe area and it was a short walk. Her name sounded like it could be male or female, but I assured him she was a she. He showed up at the bar while we were there and it made him look very insecure."

"He began tracking my phone's GPS. I found out when I stopped at a relative's house after work on my way home and he freaked out and called my Mom. She actually knew that was where I was and he had a hard time believing I wasn't cheating."

"The last straw was my first week at a new job. I worked nights and had my phone. I got this long winded email regarding an innocent comment on a Facebook selfie of me. There were screenshots of it and a huge manifesto about why my buddies online all wanted to take me away from him. After I broke up with him, I got emails for months swinging between apologies and telling me I was the abuser. I got emails telling me he was being drugged. It was insane."

8. allthejays94's ex didn't get better after highschool.

"Started dating in high school, had some ups and downs, but at the time I just chalked it up to us being immature. My last two years of college really proved he just had serious issues. When I moved out of state for good it’s like a switch flipped and he got extremely possessive and controlling."

"Wanted all my friends numbers, gave me a schedule of when we “need to be in communication” and if I missed any he was blowing my phone up with threats of suicide. Finally got the restraining order when he showed up to my friends apartment looking for me, threatening to call the police because I still had a pair of his shoes (that I didn’t even have)."

9. carbon_sequestration's ex was checked out by the FBI.

"The worst version I have of this was a guy that I had been dating, who rammed my truck with a moving van, repeatedly, at an immigration checkpoint in New Mexico, well after dark. He thought it was funny."

"He’d been behaving badly, but I just thought it was the stress of the move. The aggravated assault by U Haul is when I decided to break up with him. He stalked me for years after that, harassing me at work, which led to me getting fired. I switched from law firms to legal software, and that seemed to make it harder to find me."

"His stalking ended in blowing up a brick and mortar mailbox with plastic explosives. I think he laid low after that, because the FBI was looking for him. He eventually moved back to California, years later. An ex girlfriend of his contacted me about seven years later when she was settling his estate. She wanted to make sure there weren’t any children."

10. qwasymoto's sister's ex showed up at the wedding.

"This is about my sister. She and her ex dated on and off in high school. At some point in the 8th grade, he admitted he was in love with her and she admitted she had feelings for him, too, so they started dating in 10th grade. I told her something was off about him. I’m not necessarily an intuitive person; I try my hardest not to judge a situation too quickly, but something about him just rubbed me the wrong way."

"They dated for about 6 months and he began showing signs of abusive behavior. Like others have stated, he began calling her and keeping tabs on her. He demanded to know when she made it home and when she went to sleep. He demanded that she edit her social media (MySpace, at this time) to include pictures of them and only them so everyone knew they were together."

"She visited me in the hospital (I had a severe stomach flu). Something wasn’t right, and she told me she wanted to break up with him. She told me she was a bit scared of him. He was a big guy, maybe 6’4”, about 230 pounds. My mom begged her to end it with him and she did."

"The calls kept pouring in for about two weeks and she did her best to avoid him. Once I was back in school, I happened to catch an encounter between the two of them. He had her pinned against her locker telling her she wasn’t leaving until they “talked things out.” I told him to back off and he threatened me, and then she threatened him. He stormed off, punched a locker, broke two of his fingers. He dropped it for a while."

"He popped up a few years later on the morning of my sister’s wedding with a love letter. We are not sure how he knew she was getting married — we all had him blocked on social media (the letter was mailed to our home which she no longer lived in)."

"He hasn’t come around any more, but honestly, I would not put it past him. My sister’s husband is an avid hunter, so that may be what’s keeping him away."

11. Grandtheftauto-tune's ex got jealous of objects.

"I'll throw my hat into the ring here. Dated a chick years ago. She was essentially everything I thought I wanted in a girl. She was cute, funny, liked just enough things I liked for us to have common interests but just different enough to show each other new things and experiences I was heavy into her and she was heavy into."

"Then things got. . . . Weird. She started getting jealous of high school friends I'd known way before her and even went as far as telling me I wasn't allowed to hang out with some of my female friends except for the few she thought were uglier than her."

"Things got worse. She started getting jealous of inanimate objects like my game consoles, and video games, some of which she gave me. It came to a head when my grandmother asked me to watch her dog. She was a tiny hand dog that I adored and one day I was half asleep and saw her literally kick this tiny dog off my bed, like with her feet. I asked her what the hell her problem was and she told me that she doesn't like that I give the dog more attention than her."

"Things got even worse. She would physically abuse me when I did things she didn't like such as bending my fingers, hitting me in the face, etc. Eventually everything I did she didn't like. After a while I got the courage to dump her ass and she tries to tell me she's pregnant to keep me which is an obvious lie."

"After that I discovered she'd still stalk my Facebook page, and told some of her friends and mutual friends that I was the abuser. I also learned that when I was away she'd let dudes feel her up and other stuff too. Luckily I've landed a great girl that cares about me and isn't a jealous psycho like she was."

12. tpejic15 is luckily safe now.

"Started dating not long after a previous relationship. At first everything was amazing and I did everything for this girl."

"For my 21st birthday we went to Alton Towers with 2 of my friends (one boy and one girl) we stayed over at the hotel. We were all in the same room having a drink and a laugh when suddenly my GF storms out the room for no reason. Rightly so I follow her back to our room as to ask what’s up. Before I can even finish my sentence she punches me square in the face, gets me to the floor and kicks me about 5/6 times. I ask why and it’s because I’m apparently “always looking at my (girl) friend”.

"Anyway in the morning we set off home and I assume all is well. We drop my friends off and as I pull up to her house she puts her feet on my windscreen and kicks it 3/4 times, cracking it. Not sure why I stayed with her for a month after this as she scratched at my face repeatedly when I accepted an old school friend on Facebook."

13.littleredhoodlum's ex is an avid stalker.

"I was dating a guy. I really liked him. He was smart, funny, and adventurous. We were getting pretty serious, he pretty much lived at my house. One weekend I went home for my dads birthday. All of my brothers were home, I have 5 of them. We ate drank and were merry. One of my sister-in-laws took some pictures and posted them on facebook with me tagged in them."

"Got back to my house Sunday evening and my boyfriend was coming over shorty to hang out/ spend the night. When he got there he was basically frothing at the mouth. He shoved me and called me a whore. Started pushing me around ranting about how he had to see me whoring myself all over the internet and hanging on a bunch of guys."

"I told him they were my brothers, but at that point I was done with him. I told him to get the fuck out of my house. He took that as an invitation to throw me up against a wall and try to force me to kiss him."

"My roomie heard the commotion and came out of her room with a bat. Then shit head made the only good decision he made that day and decided to leave. Kicked in a pantry door and wrecked some drywall on his way out though."

"I threw all his stuff in a dumpster. He ended up stalking me for years. Showing up drunk at places I'd moved to after we dated. Calling after I'd changed my number. Even texted me on the week of my wedding to ask me to reconsider marrying him instead. Yeah you crazy fuck I want to dump the love of my life for a crazy stalker."

14. jKATT13's ex could not accept a break-up.

"My relationship with my ex in uni seemed really great - He loved me a lot, was supper attentive, I even went on holiday with his family and at some point I thought we'd eventually marry and start a family. Long story short, when I got busy with school (final year) and didn't see him as often, he stated getting clingy and jealous of everyone (including my female friends)."

"I tried to break up with him probably 3 times before he accepted it. Explained how I wanted to focus on my studies and the situation want good for either of us. The last time he seemed to understand my point and we remained friends. This also didn't last long, and he eventuality stared stalking me online and in person and constantly bothering my friends. He managed to go to my senior year party, even though he wasn't in my year."


"Eventually he texted me calling me a whore, that I had cheated on him, you name it. He also told this to all our mutual friends in uni, so that was fun. He acted like a total lunatic begging for me to reconsider a friendship after that, but obviously there was no chance for that. The last straw was him showing up at the graduation ceremony making it awkward for me and all my family."

15. MC_Etchasketch's ex climbed into her window and laid on her bed in wait.

"I started dating this amazing girl, but she was just getting out of an abusive marriage, and I was her first female partner."

"She started showing up at my work with flowers and coffee, which was sweet, but I had never told her where my office was. Then, she started showing up at my house at all hours, and would get upset when I needed to sleep (I worked graves). She then wanted me to meet her daughters, which I wasn't comfortable with, because we were in the first stages of a relationship."

"I decided to break it off. She was too needy, which was understandable coming from someone who had just left an abusive relationship AND discovered their sexuality, but I wasn't the person that could guide her. She decided that I was just afraid of love, and started leaving books of poetry on my porch, and leaving long letters in my mailbox."

"I finally had to call law enforcement after I came home to her in my bed. She had taken a ladder to my second story room window (I lived with roommates) and broken in. I found her naked in my bed, covered in blood from cutting herself. She proceeded to tell me that I was the only thing keeping her alive. I cut off all contact, but I truly hope that she has gotten some help and is doing well. She was a wonderful woman, but so, so broken."

Pregnant woman covers town in graffiti to try and get baby daddy to call her.

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For the love of public property, Chris, please call your Baby Mama!

The Australian town of Frankston, a suburb of Melbourne, was ravaged by an expectant mother desperate to hear from her Baby Daddy. It's a classic escalation of events: when a guy doesn't answer your texts, you call. If he doesn't answer your calls, you email. And if he doesn't answer your emails, you....graffiti the heck out the town he lives in.

The mysterious vandal sent the same message on multiple different surfaces.

"Chris, u need 2 talk 2 me b4 baby is born or dont bother after," they wrote.

The Facebook page shared pictures of the damage, with their own message for Chris:

"Chris... Can you please just call her before she destroys the whole city?"

Commenters were amused, and residents were pissed.

"No wonder Chris is avoiding you," one commenter wrote.

People started tagging the Chrises in their lives, asking, "Chris, what have you done mate?"

The graffiti was everywhere. Walls, floors, whatever this thing is...

It was everywhere. I mean EVERYWHERE.

Days after the post went viral, the Frankston Community Noticeboard page announced that an arrest had been made. A 36-year-old woman was charged with "criminal damage, wilful damage, mark graffiti and commit indictable offence whilst on bail."

The vandal is out on bail, and will appear in court for sentencing on December 13th. I'm not sure whether or not that's after the baby is born...anybody know how I can try and reach Chris?

Ex-lazy people are sharing how they overcame their laziness.

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Laziness is tough to beat. Because living life is exhausting, and the pull to eat chips on the couch all day while watching reality TV all day can feel overwhelmingly powerful. Do couches have built-in magnets?! Formerly lazy people on Reddit are sharing how they were able to overcome their laziness, and it may just inspire you to turn off your TV and put on some pants. Maybe even apply to a job or call a friend to go for a walk. And if not, that's ok too. Beating laziness (which in many cases is actually undiagnosed depression or other mental health issues) takes time, and sometimes requires treatment and medication. But remember, just because you're lazy today, doesn't mean you have to be lazy forever.

Take it from these ex-lazy people:

1.) Routine.

From YoUrK11iNMeSMa11s:

Routine. I’m a creature of habit. I had to force myself into the discomfort over and over again. Eventually this becomes the new normal. It’s all habits, you have to force new ones.

2.) Exercise in small doses.

Via jalude:

To add to this, getting to the gym and doing very little the first couple weeks is a pretty good strategy to build the habit to get there. I went there three times a week and just went for a quick swim or sat in the sauna. Adding a small amount of exercise each time. Eventually at some point, something clicked, and now I feel guilty/angry at myself if I don't exercise on my scheduled days because it breaks my routine.

3.) Identifying and treating depression.

Via ColCrabs:

A few comments call it what it is and the others almost all seem to fall squarely into the realm of depression.

The frustrating thing about this two of ‘laziness’ or being unmotivated is that it’s either ignored because you’re lazy or it’s given that heavy diagnosis of depression. Not all forms of depression result in you being sad, suicidal, or miserable all the time.

For years now I’ve been unmotivated and what I thought was lazy. I’d wait till the last minute to do homework, I’d watch YouTube or tv for hours on end, not do much with my day and I slowly stopped doing the things I enjoyed, like video games or working out.

Then I ended up napping, a lot. Like physically couldn’t stay awake no matter how hard I tried. I went to the doctor and they said the basic nonsense about diet and exercise so I figured that I’d prove to them that wasn’t the case. So I started eating better and exercising with no change. Saw a different doctor and she immediately diagnosed it as depression.

I really didn’t believe her since I’m not sad, suicidal, or want to hurt other people. She gave me a referral to a therapist and left it up to me to decide when to go. Well I fucking procrastinated as usual and it took me months to go.

When I arrived I immediately told the therapist I think it’s all bullshit and I’m not depressed. That’s when she started explaining the different forms for depression, anxiety, and stress. It really bugs me that all forms of depression are grouped under the single name as it prevents a lot of people from getting the really simple and basic help they need to get back on track with things.

Anyway, she explained that this form of depression is caused by internalizing pressure and stress which in turn exhausts you both mentally and physically. Mismanaging your time and procrastination slowly builds up a subconscious pressure that will drag you down but it will also make you accustomed to the immediate reward of not doing something. A few examples:

Not washing the dishes or doing the laundry causes you to think about it each time you see it or need a dish or piece of clothing. As it piles up it also piles onto your sub-conscience but instead of doing it you can immediately get satisfaction by grabbing a new plate or a partly dirty shirt. It’ll keep weighing on you though, throughout the day that pile will sneak into your mind for a few seconds and bring you down a little more.

The same goes for sleeping. The more you hit snooze, or over sleep, or take naps when you’re tired the more your body will become accustomed to the immediate reward of going back to sleep rather than the delayed reward of staying up and doing something productive.

Anyway, I ended up going to a therapist for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy which turned into basically just a lesson on time-management and balancing work/routine/hobbies. I’d recommend anyone who feels lazy to check it out. Things like SMART goals, the vicious/virtuous cycle, and the three legged stool are all great tools to overcome this type of laziness and depression.

Edit:

This workbook is what my therapist used and it’s incredibly helpful on its own.

The most important thing to remember is to not jump straight into things and expect to be better in a day. I’ve been working at it for about a year now and some days and weeks I fall back into old routines. Overall though I went from sleeping until noon and going to sleep at crazy hours and getting 10-12 hours of sleep, eating like shit, napping, and barely getting things done to waking up at 6am going to sleep at 11pm, going to the gym every day, never napping and getting tons of work done.

4.) A full-time job.

From Tyler_Oxide:

Whenever I've got a full time job, it switches my life around - I want to go to the gym, see friends, cook, etc. When I'm part-time/studying/not working, I go back into mega lazy mode.

5.) The 5-minute rule.

Via clownlovingbaboo:

Two things: Finding something I love doing for work and the five minute rule. Basically if it will take you less than 5 minutes - you do it. this then applies to everything with motivation. You get to a point where rather than having to motivate yourself to do things you train yourself to respond to the thought. Rather than "I should go to the gym" being followed by trying to find the energy and being passive, you get into the habit of when you have that thought you change clothes, gather your stuff and leave the house immediately. It doesn't always help but I achieve a lot more than I used to. I think the key to making it work is getting enough sleep.

6.) Self-care.

Via clownlovingbaboo:

Two things: Finding something I love doing for work and the five minute rule. Basically if it will take you less than 5 minutes - you do it. this then applies to everything with motivation. You get to a point where rather than having to motivate yourself to do things you train yourself to respond to the thought. Rather than "I should go to the gym" being followed by trying to find the energy and being passive, you get into the habit of when you have that thought you change clothes, gather your stuff and leave the house immediately. It doesn't always help but I achieve a lot more than I used to. I think the key to making it work is getting enough sleep.

7.) Treat your mental health.

Via wibbles94:

I took Lexapro when I was depressed and it significantly helped. It didn’t necessarily make me happy but it was a tool to help propel me into a healthy lifestyle.

I was unable to think any negative thoughts on it, my sleep was MUCH more regulated, and I woke up refreshed and ready to start my day. I got into a daily routine of waking up early, working out, taking walks, eating healthy and eventually got off of it the lexapro as my body/serotonin responded better to my lifestyle. I was on it for about 2 months.

8.) Put off your laziness until tomorrow.

Via pukegreenwithenvy

By procrastinating being lazy.

Genius!

9.) Job that doesn't let you be lazy.

Via idoidoidoew:

Got a job that forced me to be “on” basically 100% of the time. The more others depend on me, the less lazy I tend to be.

10.) If needed, medicate.

Via de_meid:

Meds! Turned out the laziness was my ADD preventing me from focusing on tasks long enough to finish them.

11.) Schedule everything.

From hamaTamago:

I started a couple of fixed daily/weekly schedules, like what time to workout. I chose something that I enjoy doing and tie a fixed schedule to it, then expanded by scheduling more useful things like a sleeping schedule and eating schedule. I slip up occasionally, but those things that I like stay constant, and it helps.

12.) Baby steps, literally.

From qdobe:

Not to dimish what other people are saying, but sometimes the "Just do it" advice doesn't quite touch home for a lot of people, like me, who dosen't necessarily feel lazy but just tired all the time, which can be construed as laziness.

But do you ever notice when you're feeling tired or "lazy" it's usually when your sitting? Maybe watching TV, sitting on the computer, in a comfortable position?

Sometimes being productive takes steps. One thing that helped me is to take the baby steps. I'll be sitting watching TV and start to doze off. What is one small thing that can help with that? Stand up and watch TV. It'll make you feel a little less tired. Standing and watching TV, then, might make you feel a little restless, maybe you look over at the table and notice it's a little cluttered, so you walk over and clean it while you stand and watch TV. Maybe when you finish cleaning the table while you watch TV, you'll remember you have a project or assignment you need to work on, so you can start doing that while you stand and have the TV on in the background. Maybe when you worked on your project for a little while, you start to get a little mentally fatigued, so maybe you take a break with that by watching some TV, but maybe this time you do it while standing and doing some dishes.

Simply standing is a huge starting point for me. Whenever I feel tired or lazy and I don't really want to be, and I want to be productive, I'll just stand up, maybe walk around the house a little bit. It gets the gears in motion for me, and it's an incredibly small but effective starter.

A body in motion stays in motion and a body at rest stays at rest. I found out that is a VERY true statement.

13.) Just do it.

Via Dauwz:

For me it was mostly being tired of doing nothing. Now, saying that is much easier than actually getting over it. I did my best to make it something of a habit. Come back from the office, rough day, tired as hell. Kitchen's messy? Clean it, doesn't matter how tired you are. You'll feel better when it's clean. Gotta do laundry? Do it. You'll have fresh clothes later. I've come to find that thinking about how doing something will result in a positive goes quite a ways in terms of incentivizing you to do it.

With time, the 'forcing yourself' stops feeling forced and it becomes natural. My two cents.

14.) Less bong, more gym.

Via CirclleySquare:

It took a while for me. I realized my laziness was probably due to being depressed, and I was depressed because I wasn't doing anything but coming home and smoking pot and playing video games. Now, I don't have problem with a little weed and video games, but for me it was routine. I started going to the gym every other day and started being more active to combat depression, and I've since lost ~70 pounds and have become a lot happier with my way of life. I quit smoking mainly for the job I'm currently trying to get, and that only helped because rather than coming home and getting stoned I wanted to do other things with my day. I have actual hobbies and interests now, and find that I like myself as a person now.

15.) Dress for the activity you want.

Via canuchangeusernames:

If it can be done in 5 minutes, get it over with now. If you have to do something like go to the gym but cant find the energy, just put on your gym clothes. Then you're already dressed.

16.) Clean your room.

Via SaltyBarker:

I cleaned my room... I used to weight close to 300 lbs. My room had trash all over it, you couldn't even see the floor and I was 19 years old. I decided to change, I cleaned my room, then started going to the gym, lost 100lbs in a year, and now at 23 am healthy, happy, and in a long term relationship, with a great job, and living life to the fullest.

17.) Therapy.

From FEEdwards:

Realised the laziness was actually procrastination caused by my anxiety and depression. I go to therapy now and I've come up with ways to curb my procrastination (such as setting timers, giving myself rewards, finding more effective ways to work and working out what triggers my anxiety), and I'm less harsh on myself if I'm not up to a task.

18.) Pick a few tasks to do and reward yourself after.

Via gotsthepockets:

Definitely easier said than done, but still very doable. I found myself wasting hours after work because I was exhausted and just couldn't bring myself to get started on all the things I should be doing.

My new approach that has really helped is I pick 2-4 things (depending on if/how much I worked that day) that I MUST do before I sit and veg. For example, after an especially tiring day at work (I'm a teacher) I will load or unload the dishwasher and clean all the counters in the kitchen. It usually takes me 15 minutes or so and then I give myself permission to sit on the couch.

I've learned that there are usually two results from this--I don't have to deal with that gnawing guilt of not getting stuff done OR (this happens regularly) I get my second wind and get a few more things done. Either way, I feel better mentally and physically than I did when I was just "too tired" after work.

19.) There's no "magic fix."

From slipperyfingerss:

My wife suffers from depression. She basically states it as, there is no magic fix. Your meds help you at least think about what to do. But then, you just have to do it. You will never wake up one day and say, I want to tackle the world today. You just have to do little pieces at a time. She said the same as you did. Laundry, dishes, pick up clutter, and eventually work that into working out.

20.) Make lists.

Via TheBassMeister:

Two things that helped at least a little bit:

  1. Doing things early during the day. The later the day gets the less likely I will do what I should do. This will also free your mind from that thing for the rest of the day.

  2. Making a visual To-Do list on a piece of paper placed in a spot that I will see it multiple times during a day.

21.) Curb or quit your drinking.

Rev1physicked:

I realized my laziness was due to drinking too much before bed in college.

This guy below getting dildos glued to his back passed out is great inspiration to stop.

OKAY FIIIINE I'll put on pants and get my life together. All it took was a video of a guy with dildos glued to his back.

25 Memes That Will Only Be Funny If You're From A Small Town.

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"There may be no secrets in small towns, but there are no strangers either."

-R.A. Mathis

If you grew up in a small town, you will definitely relate to these hilarious memes about small-town life. I spent my teenage years hanging out in the Dairy Queen parking lot, riding around on dirt roads, and drinking cheap beer in fields, so I know what I'm talking about here.

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Mom gets racist stranger fired from his job after he called her son a racial slur.

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A mom reported a racist stranger to his job, twice, after he called her biracial son the "n-word" during a road rage incident. Now he is "probably" getting fired, she shared on Reddit.

She's asking if she's the "a**hole" in this situation, but if anything, this mom is #goals.

The woman, who is white, shared that her 15-year-old son, who is biracial, recently got his learner's permit and accidentally cut off a guy in a truck. It happens! Especially when you're first learning to drive.

She writes:

My husband and I have a 15 year old son, who is biracial; my husband is African American and I am white (this will be important later on in the story). My son just got his driver’s permit and has begun driving with me on a regular basis. The other day we were on the road, and he accidentally cut off a truck, making him have to break abruptly.

She scolded her son and waved "sorry" to the driver, but about a minute later, the guy pulled up next to them at a red light and shouted the n-word at her son.

She says the encounter "wounded" her son and "sickened" her:

I scolded my son and gave a “sorry” wave to the driver. At the next red light which came about a minute later, the guy pulled up next to us. His car had a large company logo on it, indicating he was on the job. He rolled down the window and shouted the N-word at my son. My son’s face went pale, and he was quiet, depressed and clearly wounded deeply the rest of the drive home. The encounter sickened me.

The man's truck displayed a company logo, so this mom did some research into the company and found them on Facebook.

She gave his employers a call and reported the man's abusive, racist behavior, and they promised to "take care of the situation."

I did some research on the company; at one point I even plugged them into Facebook. They have a very active Facebook page and seem like an organization that prides themselves on a good image and good customer service. I called the company and reported the man’s behavior, describing him very vividly. They informed me that they knew exactly who I was talking about, and that all their drivers drive with a dashcam, so his behavior is on camera. I had a good feeling about the encounter and that they were going to definitely take care of the situation.

But apparently "taking care of the situation" didn't mean getting the guy fired.

Two months later, the mom spotted a photo on Facebook of the racist guy "grinning" alongside his co-workers in a photo of a company-wide project.

Two months later, when I was browsing Facebook kind of boredly one day, the company’s name was recommended in my search, and just for the hell of it I clicked and looked at their page for the first time in two months. One of the very first photos/posts I saw from just a day ago showed a big group of their employees huddled together in their company yard, with some kind of tag about a project they just completed. To my horror, I saw the employee who shouted at my son in the group, grinning widely. Meaning they didn’t fire him.

So she decided to report the guy, again. But this time she upped her game. The company is part of a nationwide chain, so she called their corporate headquarters and reported the incident to the "highest person" she could reach.

She says this guy sounded "disgusted," apologized profusely, and strongly suggested the man would be fired.

The company is part of a nationwide chain, so I called their corporate headquarters, was connected to the highest person I could get to, and I reported the incident to them, and complained about how they didn’t fire him. The man I spoke to sounded disgusted, way, way more so than the previous person I’d reported him to, apologized profusely, and thanked me very much for telling him. Additionally, he made multiple statements about how racists and bigots have “no place” and “no future” in his company, giving me a strong feeling the offending employee’s career is now toast.

The mom took to Reddit's "Am I The A**hole?" forum to ask if she was "right" to get this guy fired by "double-reporting" him.

Was it right of me to “double-report” this guy? I’m sure he was given at least some consequence the first time around (if not fired) and wonder if some might argue that I was going too far or being vindictive by reporting him again. Am I an asshole or a “Karen” for not dropping this matter?

Commenters seem to have concluded that she is most definitely not the "a**hole" (or the "Karen") in this case and that the guy deserved what was coming to him.

Jaywearspants writes:

NTA - dude deserves worse than losing his job for using that kind of racist language with a fucking child. Good on you. I hope his life is hell.

And NiGhTmArEofInSaNiTy agrees:

NTA - He had no right to call your son the N-word, your son did absolutely nothing wrong. There is nothing that should be tolerated about a person throwing racial slurs out of thin air.

It's always encouraging to hear a story about a racist in the U.S.A. actually facing consequences for their actions. Maybe this mom can work her magic on our President next?


Mike Pence tells group to 'spend more time on your knees than on the internet.'

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Known homophobe Mike Pence delivered a glorious rhetorical gift to the internet yesterday, advising some people at a talk to "spend more time on your knees than on the internet." Yes, he said these words out loud!

The sentence was uttered at a talk hosted by by the Alliance Defending Freedom, an organization that supports discrimination against LGBT people under the guise of religious liberty, according to the Advocate.

So why was Pence compelled to say this? Because the CEO of the group asked him how members of the group could deal with backlash for... you know, being homophobes.

“No. 1 is, spend more time on your knees than on the internet,” he said. He then added, “Forgiveness is a great gift.”

Naturally, his words lit the internet on fire.

It was apparently lost on Pence that what he's suggesting sounds an awful lot like givin' a beej.

Some are sarcastically applauding his newfound sex positivity.

Others felt a little bamboozled.

And one guy speculated on his possible new favorite TV show.

It was a bridge too far for some.

Others are filing it away to use later on.

And blaming Megan Thee Stallion for the gaffe, which doesn't seem fair.

Then there's the other elephant in the room: Pence actually isn't that big of a fan of people getting on their knees for non-sexual reasons. He once walked out of an NFL game after players kneeled during the national anthem.

But anyway, let's be serious: despite all this kerfuffle, we're probably still gonna spend the majority of our time on the internet.

Broadway shows stopped when motorcycle backfiring in Times Square was mistaken for active shooter.

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Widespread panic broke out in Times Square last night when a motorcycle backfired and people mistook it for a bomb or an active shooter.

Eyewitnesses said people stormed a nearby theatre, stopping a performance of "To Kill a Mockingbird" and sending theatre patrons into a panic. People even hid in bathrooms out of fear, according to one witness whose tweets are posted below.

Police were able to calm people down on the scene within five minutes, according to New York Magazine.

The video below shows what the panic looked like.

But others in the area were left fearing for their lives. One spectator said she was left crouching on the floor during a Broadway performance of "To Kill a Mockingbird" because of the noise.

Gideon Glick, an actor in the show, said people tried to run into the Schubert Theatre for safety, causing panic inside.

Another actor weighed in, saying the theatre was basically placed on lockdown.

A witness mentioned running as far as he could.

Anywhere from 12 to 24 people, based on differing reports, were injured from running away.

One witness, Brett Tubbs, tweeted about his experience working at the Imperial Theatre througout the ordeal.

Just 28 Memes To Help You Start Your Day Off With A Laugh.

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"Make each day your masterpiece."

-John Wooden

If you want to start your day off on a positive note, I strongly recommend laughter. These memes are the perfect dose of random silliness to turn that morning frown upside down.

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Ivanka Trump's tweets about mass shooting in Chicago get fact-checked by the mayor.

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Ivanka Trump is getting called out and fact checked after claiming 7 people were killed and 52 were wounded in Chicago over the weekend.

In response to the massive outpouring of grief and debate following the mass shootings in El Paso and Dayton, Ivanka urged Americans to direct their attention towards the gun violence that took lives in Chicago over the weekend.

Ivanka's tweets were quickly fact-checked by Lori Lightfoot, the mayor of Chicago during a press conference on Tuesday.

"She got the numbers wrong, she got the location wrong, that's the danger of trying to govern via tweet. Well, that's the danger of somebody with a platform and audience of that kind that doesn't know what they're talking about and getting the fundamental facts wrong."

It wasn't a playground, it was a park. It wasn't seven dead, it wasn't 52 wounded in one incident, and it's misleading. It's important, when we're talking about people's lives, to get the facts correct.

According to The New York Times, there was not one mass shooting but 32 separate shooting incidents in the city across the entire weekend. This includes one two hour window on Sunday during which 17 people were wounded on the West Side.

Despite being corrected by the mayor, Ivanka's tweets are still posted, and people have been piling on her for feigning concern without fact checking. Many think her wording is intentionally manipulative, since it causes readers to theink there was one mass shooting this past weekend in Chicago.

People were quick to point out the fact that IVanka is using Chicago as a prop to distract from very real discussions about necessary gun reform, and the racist influence of her father.

The White House published an official statement in response to the backlash and Lightfoot's fact-checking:

"Ivanka has appreciated getting to know Mayor Lightfoot, respects her commitment to addressing this issue and looks forward to continuing the conversation around this issue, workforce development and economic opportunity for all."

"To the extent that her quote was misleading in implying that all of the shooting incidents occurred in one location, it remains important to note that there were 7 deaths and 52 wounded across the city, resulting in one of the deadliest weekends in the city this year."

"Her point remains the same, we cannot ignore the gun violence that happens in cities across this country on a daily basis."

Man asks if he's wrong for refusing to be patted down for drugs at his sister's wedding.

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Attending a family member's wedding can be incredibly stressful, seeing as the situation includes two very tense topics: weddings and family. Things can get even more complicated when you are currently working on sobriety.

A man shared his complex and upsetting situation at his sister's wedding on reddit recently, after he encountered a high-stress situation and left feeling angry.

He had recently decided to become sober, and was attending his sister's wedding.

His sister had helped him out in time of need, so being at her wedding was a pretty big deal. He explained:

I’m 24 and I’m an addict who has been in recovery for the past six months.

I used and used until I was basically in poverty and my older sister helped bail me out more than once.

She’s my best friend and I know it hurt her a lot to see me like that.

She also met her fiancé two years ago and he really only knew me as the junkie brother then. He’s not my biggest fan to say the least considering how much I put my sister through.

Despite this she still invited me to her wedding last week because I am her brother and she wanted me to be there.

Things took a turn for the worse when the groom insisted on stop-and-frisking this guy in front of everyone.

When I get to the reception, my brother in law is greeting people as they walk in.

When I walk by he pulls me to the side and in front of everyone starts patting me down and says that he needs to check me to make sure I “didn’t bring anything in”. I instinctively pull away, because why wouldn’t I, and I tell him not to touch me.

Not wanting to be treated like a second-class citizen at his sister's wedding, he refused to be searched, and things got heated.

He tells me to “calm down” and that if I want to be here then he needs to do this. I tell him he’s being ridiculous and I try to push past him. He stops me and tells me that he doesn’t want to throw me out but he “will if he has to.” I told him that he’s trying to look tough but it’s just making him look stupid.

At this point I’m getting more and more angry and I’m practically yelling in his face at this point. Bystanders came between us and separated us and told my BIL to just “drop it.” He said he would but that “they can deal with it when I get out of hand.”

I just went to go find a seat after that.

That was the end of the confrontation, but not the resolution of this issue. Unfortunately, this man's family is still upset over the matter.

After the reception, a lot of my family told me that I should’ve let him just do it and that I was acting like a huge asshole and like I had “something to hide.”

I don’t think he had any right to pat me down, especially in front of people and I don’t think my reaction was over the top. If anything, he was the one acting like a huge douche by trying to start drama so he can look tough. My sister has refused to take any sides in this.

AITA?

So, now he wants to know if he was the assh*le in the situation. And the good people of reddit had answers for him.

Most didn't think this guy was in the wrong, and noted that the groom's choice to do this in public was especially offensive.

Sailor_Chibi said:

NTA. His reaction was so unnecessary and he is the one who caused a spectacle by trying to pat you down in front of everyone.

Zeusified30 replied:

Yup, his choice to do this in public is embarrasing and a real dick move. He should've let you know beforehand that he would have issues with you being there, like a man.

And LilBabyADHD said:

Absolutely. Like I get 6 months of recovery isn't a ton of time passed, but it's also not nothing (also honestly good on you, OP, for making it 6 months)! And if he felt this strongly that this was something they needed to do, that OP was at risk of relapse because of their wedding (?), he should have:

  • discussed it with OP's sister and been in agreement with her about it;

  • told OP beforehand that it was a condition for his attendance; AND

  • arranged for it to happen discretely, in a private place and not in front of everyone

you don't just get to spring that shit on someone, in public no less, and then attempt to embarrass them into compliance.

Then, in another comment on the post, it became clear that this guy had gotten into physical altercations with his brother-in-law while high at other family functions. Some people felt this detail took away his rights to be treated as any other attendee at the wedding.

rocker3k said:

Yeah I have to go with ESH, OP NEEDED to put that info in the text box. I think that it’s so influential to the post that it should be counted as voter manipulation. Obviously no one would say not that asshole without the important facts. honestly given the fact that op neglected to put in the glaring facts that completely change the voting mods should make him re upload the post with the extra information. Don’t get me wrong though I respect OP for even putting in that information at all even though it was in the comment section, and frankly the brother in law should have gone about the testing differently which is why I voted ESH.

And Keanucordenbleu said:

ESH, he doesn’t have any right to do that but yelling is not going to get anyone on your side.

You’ve fucked over your sister in the past, maybe you should give the guy that loves her a break.

Obviously, this story has a lot of layers, and it's difficult to have an informed opinion on such a personal matter. But I think we can all agree that weddings are the worst.

15 people share the best compliments they’ve received.

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The internet, and the world, are full of nightmares. You deserve to read something that will quickly give you the warm-fuzzies and inspire you to be kind out loud. The thread"What is the best compliment you've ever received?" is a good place to get ideas/

Please memorize them and tell them to your friends. They're what everyone needs to hear.

(It's also okay to read these and pretend that they're about you.)

1. "When I hang out with you, I always end up laughing."

-BlueMeanie2

2. "Someone I had just met told me I was funny. It was the first time I ever got a non-superficial compliment (nice clothes, shoes, etc) and being a very insecure teenager at the time that one really stuck with me."

-loes_ger

3. "'Maybe you should ask her (me) for the answer, she’s very smart.' — My crush from 7th grade English class."

-allieanne29

4. "I was sitting with my mother when my 5 year old daughter came over screaming about something. I asked her what she was frustrated about and then we talked it out and she walked away happy. My mom then said to me 'Wow that was some good parenting.'"

-kdp03010

5. "My dad using my song as his ringtone."

-jaxy_t

6. "A former boss said, 'I like that you have a Type B personality, but you get Type A results.'"

-boyvsfood2

7. "I just told the music minister at our church that I was pregnant. She was so excited for me and she said, ‘I’m so happy for the world!’ Made me cry a bit."

-MamaRabia

8. "The 8-year old my sister has nannied for 4 years now once told me 'I think you're as great as pizza is to the Ninja turtles.' I will never receive a better compliment in my life."

-epicPants_13

9. "I recently started seeing this girl and we really hit it off. We went on our first date and basically talked/laughed for 6hrs straight. Almost immediately after dropping her off she sent me a text saying how much fun she had etc. and then added at the end 'I feel like you'd even make grocery shopping fun.' Which for some reason really sticks with me."

-Little_Bedroom

10. "When I was about 14, I overheard two camp counselors talking and one said she’d love to have a daughter like me someday."

-plumpolly

11. "'You’re the glue that holds us together.' My friend said this to me in junior high, and almost 20 years later, I have not forgotten how it made me feel."

-QueenG723

12. "My friends always tell me that I have a soothing voice and that they like listening to me talking."

-HeyTrie

13. "I was in a really bad depressive episode and had work early in the morning. I threw on the first thing i saw and walked downstairs to the bus station. This old lady was there and turned to me and smiled and said “you look absolutely exquisite” i was so taken aback it totally made me happy and fixed my mood for the day. Thank you for your kind words ma’am :)"

-theminimalistpharaoh

14. "'You are one of the kindest, most respectful people I have ever met.' I was left speechless on how to respond."

-benevolentTacent

15. "You're really good at your job."

-towardsthesunshine6

33 memes mocking the GOP's claims that video games are the cause of mass shootings.

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Blaming video games for violence is a tale as old as the original MarioKart. And despite scientific research disproving the link between video games and shootings, the myth persists, with an assist from GOP politicians. Earlier this week, President Trump cited video games as one of the causes of the recent deadly mass shootings in El Paso, Texas, and Dayton, Ohio. "We must stop the glorification of violence in our society. This includes the gruesome and grisly video games that are now commonplace," he said. "It is too easy today for troubled youth to surround themselves with a culture that celebrates violence." Speaking of too easy, it's too easy for the GOP to blame video games than to take a stand against the NRA and white supremacy.

The internet was not willing to tolerate the President and GOP using this tired scapegoat and they instantly called out the bullsh*t with some darkly hilarious and poignant memes. Here are 33 of the best ones:

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Man wants to share his lottery winnings with his ex-wife even though it upsets his girlfriend.

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Divorce is a whole different game when you have kids together. If you're both dedicated to co-parenting, then you're going to regularly see each other, and finding ways to be civil and respectful is key.

While finding a way to work together is even more difficult if the divorce took place because of an affair, it's still possible if both ex-partners are laser focused on the well-being of the children.

In a post on the subreddit Am I The *sshole, a man shared how he recently won the lottery and wants to share the winnings with his ex-wife, the mother of his children.

"AITA for giving my ex wife a large amount of money I won despite the anger of my gf?"​​

OP kicked off the post by sharing that he recently won millions of dollars in lotto money.

"I recently won a ‘fuck you’ amount of money. I won’t say exactly how much but it’s in the millions. It makes me feel funny even typing It’s enough to change the life of myself and my family."

OP divorced his ex-wife six years ago after cheating on her with his current partner.

He recognizes his past wrongdoings, and the ways his ex has buckled up to co-parent, and doesn't take it for granted despite breaking the marriage.

"My ex wife is the mother of my 2 kids. She is an amazing woman and good to the bone. We divorced 6 years ago because I had an affair with my current partner. I was in a low place in my life and I fucked up. She was in incredible pain but - like a fucking saint- she allowed me to still see our kids who mean the world to me, allowed our divorce to be as pain free as possible despite the fact that I know she was hurting. She still is close with my parents. She is respectful to me although she refuses to talk to my gf."

After telling his parents and girlfriend, OP immediately phoned his ex to share the news of his lottery winnings.

While he didn't tel her he intended to share with her, OP immediately decided he wanted to give her a sizable amount to hep with raising the kids and also cushion her daily life.

"She was actually the first person I phoned after my mom and pops after I found out I won the lottery. She was pleased for me, joked that I could take the kids on a world round trip, and that was that. Nothing else. as soon as I won, I knew I wanted to give her a significant amount. I still love her. She’s the mother of my babies and I feel like this is some small tiny way I can show her that I’m not a complete fuck up. "

While OP's lawyer and parents immediately agreed with the decision, he didn't think about how it would make his current girlfriend feel.

"She deserves to know that I care despite my mistakes. She also works a shitty job in the public library which pays her peanuts- she would actually be able to pursue her hobbies this way. Give our kids a better life between us. I haven’t discussed this with my ex yet, but I have with my parents who strongly agree and my lawyer who was very surprised but on board."

When OP shared the plan with his girlfriend, she immediately got angry and accused him of being in love with his ex.

Her anger quickly escalated into threats to dump him, which caused OP to realize he wouldn't be sad without her.

"Long story short, when I told my gf, she was my livid. Screaming that I’m disrespecting her, accusing me of still being in love with my ex wife- I’m not in love with her. We’ve both grown apart, but of course I still love her for being an excellent co parenting partner and mother to my kids. My gf is threatening to break up with me, and tbh I’m feeling incredibly relieved over the threats. I don’t plan on changing my plans, but AITA?"

While OP doesn't plan on changing his plans, the strong reaction from his girlfriend has him wondering whether it's a jerk move.

Safahri doesn't think OP is a jerk, but also thinks it's understandable for the girlfriend to have complicated feelings.

"NTA if you intended for the money to help out her and your kids. If you only intended to give it to her because you 'love' your ex wife then you're a bit of an asshole (ESH) for making your current girlfriend a 'plan b'. The way she reacted was a little over the top, but to be expected since you are giving money to another woman (that you used to be married to)."

"Otherwise, you do have kids to provide for and it's none of her business because you're not married and you don't share the money."

"Just a question: did she know you had a wife when you had an affair with her? Because if she did then the whole 'disrespecting her' is a load of bullshit because she did the same thing to your ex wife."

OP directly responded to Safahri's comment to clear up a few questions about the nature of his relationship with both his girlfriend and ex-wife.

"She did know I was married to my wife yes. I agree that her claiming disrespect is bullshit because we both engaged in very disrespectful behavior towards my ex wife."

"The money is being given with the full intention that ex wife did me right over these years and I want to do right by her too. She’s the mother of my kids and she also deserves a good life. I also want the kids to grow up in 2 wonderful environments instead of dad having a ‘nice’ place and moms place being comparatively bereft. I don’t think that would be fair."

Strivingtosucceed thinks OP's girlfriend is being unreasonable.

"NTA the fact that you called her first means you still hold her dear in your heart and the maturity she showed after you destroyed her makes me understand why. Give her the money you were planning to give, give her double even. But your GF is a witch if she can't understand that you have kids that deserve to partake of their father's wealth. Also the fact you haven't married your GF after 6 years together shows how you feel about her. Break up with her and enjoy your money with your real family."

cadusn believes OP should do whatever he wants with the money, and suspects the girlfriend's reaction is insecurity.

"NTA. Your money, your decision. I suspect the anger from your gf is probably just insecurity given the nature of how your relationship with her started."

queenofthera pointed out the difference between how OP talks about his ex-wife and his girlfriend.

"NTA...but what I will say, is that I think your current GF is in an unenviable position. While she's wrong to resent you giving money to the mother of your children, the way you talk does sound like you're still in love with your ex-wife, and that you consider cheating with your current GF as the biggest mistake of your life. Just by the way you write, it sounds like you (rightly) accept that what you did was wrong, but also that you believe you would have been happier if you'd never met your gf."

"If I've picked up on this, (and assuming I'm not a million miles off the mark), it's reasonable to assume your gf has too, which may explain her reaction. You were wrong to string her along for this long, especially as you now seem to feel happy she's talking about ending it. You should have broken up with her a long time ago, it seems."

Finn_Finite thinks OP is in denial of his feelings for his ex-wife.

"NAH. I would actually recommend immediately getting a financial advisor and/or a lawyer, because people do an awful lot of dumb shit the year after winning the lottery. Your girlfriend saw dollar signs and is mad at you for taking them away from "the two of you", and family will be worse. Your generosity toward your kids does you cre... I mean actually you barely mentioned your kids and this post is a glowing gushing love song to your ex wife so I mean I really see how your girlfriend could feel threatened."

fstarnes9 actually thinks OP is the *sshole for how he is treating his girlfriend.

"Unpopular, but heavily leaning towards YTA because you 1. cheated on your wife, 2. still treated your girlfriend as a lower priority despite cheating on your wife for her. obviously you should give your ex wife money as she has the kids, but talking to everyone about it before your significant other of... 6 years? Jesus. the people calling her a witch for being upset would never react the same if it was them."

GKShaktiShaman thinks that everyone in the situation sucks.

"ESH. Dating someone that has strong romantic or love feelings towards someone else sucks, especially if its an Ex. It would make anyone jealous. The fact that you called your wife FIRST outside of parents is terrible for your GF to know. I wouldn't want to date someone that did that to me. I'm not their first priority past parents and kids."

"On top of that nowhere in the post do you mention the epic trip you'll take her to or how you will help your GF. Sure you made a "mistake" with her and got a divorce but this woman has supported you in the lowest point of your life. That's huge, man."

"In addition She is reacting harshly. No need to put ultimatums or talk roughly. If I were her, I'd just walk away. If the money was two college funds and a paid out for 5 years babysitter - that'd be fair. Or even pay the mortgage on the ex-wife's house for 6 months kind of thing. But just giving an ex partner $1-4 Mill is a lot."

"It does show you care. But it also shows you value your ex wife's needs above your current partner. That's terrible for her."

"Personally I think for your selfish benefit - you should rekindle things with your ex-wife. She still loves you and for the kids it would be great. I would give some to the GF as a parting gift.

EDIT: Just found out he dated the GF for SIX YEARS? Jesus I feel sorry for her. Break Up with her and at least pay her something for wasting 6 years while being in love with your wife."

While this situation certainly isn't cut and dry, the general consensus seems to be that it's healthy of OP to give money to support his ex-wife and kids, but the way he writes about his girlfriend shows disrespect and red flags.

27 Memes For People Who Don't Want Kids.

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"I have... not one regret about not having children because I believe that it is the way it's supposed to be."

-Oprah Winfrey

Contrary to popular belief, not everyone needs to have children. Some people like having money, quiet time, and freedom. It's pretty damn great. (You can also cuss freely, so there's that.) If you're proud to be child-free, these memes will definitely crack you up!

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Woman claims she was 'discriminated' against at café when server didn't like her Trump 2020 button.

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In late July, a tourist visiting D.C. from Texas dined at Open City Cafe at Washington National Cathedral, where she claimed she felt discriminated against for her conservative beliefs. After an encounter with her server at the cafe, Jacqueline Johanning posted on Facebook Live about her experience, where she was "treated horribly" for having a Trump 2020 button on her backpack.

This is Jacqueline Johanning:

Johanning also posted this on Facebook:

According to The Washington Post, the server has her own version of the story. In a video that has since been made private, the server explained that she only expressed her disapproval for the button because the women she was serving inquired what was wrong after noticing her face drop upon seeing it. When asked what was wrong, the server simply answered, “I don’t appreciate that you’re wearing that pin.”

After this comment, the women asked the manager of the cafe to reimburse them, and he obliged. They said they felt unwelcome and "discriminated against," to which the server responded, "As a queer, low-income woman, it’s funny to me you think that’s discrimination."

Three days after the incident, the server was fired. Officials at Tryst Trading Company claim that the server was fired due to her overall performance, but she told The Washington Post that she believes the firing was directly linked to the incident with the Trump supporters, as she was sent home later that day and never put back on the schedule.

Open City Cafe made their own Facebook post, which read: "There’s enough politics in this town already; let’s work to keep OCNC, your neighborhood cafe, a place where politics is kept off the menu."

And a few people left comments in support of the server in this situation and shaming the cafe for not taking its employee's side.

Johanning told The Washington Post that she didn't think the server should have been fired.

"We don’t have to hate each other just because of our political views,” Johanning said. “We can still be kind and . . . agree to disagree. Don’t let that define us. I think the labels are preventing our vision."

The server said she didn't think Trump supporters should be unwelcome, have to leave, or be be banned, but she does think she had the right to state her opinion, and that they should realize their support for this president might get a reaction out of people.

As she put it, "Speech goes two ways."

'Green shirt guy' cracking up at MAGA protestor becomes viral internet star.

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What makes an internet legend? Sometimes it's as simple as being in the right place at the right time. A guy in a green shirt has gone viral after appearing at a Tuscon City Council meeting which was interrupted by an anti-immigration protestor in a MAGA hat yelling about immigration laws and carrying a sign that says "Respect our laws or we WILL deport you." While others in the crowd yell "boo!" in an attempt to drown out her yelling, a guy in the green shirt sitting in front of her can't stop cracking up. He was captured in a video taken by a reporter, which was shared on Twitter, where it went viral. #Greenshirtguy is now trending, and being widely hailed as a "hero" for reacting to anti-immigration rhetoric for what it is: an absurd joke.

For some background: the woman's protest was apparently prompted by officials voting to put a measure on the ballot that would propose making Tucson a "sanctuary city" for immigrants.

At one point someone told her "you are in direct violation for being a jacka**" before she was booed out of the room.

There was also a guy with a banjo.

The whole event was a sh*t show, but #greenshirtguy undoubtedly stole the show, becoming today's viral internet star.

Green shirt guy has been identified as Alex Kack.

People who know him are confirming that he is, in fact, "rad."

Here's what the green shirt guy himself has to say about all the attention:

This guy urged everyone to channel #greenshirtguy energy next time their space is invaded by someone spewing MAGA rhetoric:

Is the best response to MAGA ridiculousness to just laugh at it? Maybe worth a shot. I agree with this person, that we all need a little laughter right now.

And when you're done laughing, here's how you can help:

Now get out there and be the green shirt guy you wish to see in the world.

People responded to pro-gun person claiming gun control is against the constitution.

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Sadly, the debate over mass shootings and gun reform in America seems to be perpetually relevant. Last weekend's shootings in Dayton and El Paso killed 34 people and reignited the ongoing debate over the nature of gun laws in the U.S.

While polls have shown 68 percent of Americans believe we need stricter gun laws to keep military style weapons out of civilian hands, there is still a pocket of people who cling to the second amendment during discussions about gun rights.

In a screenshot uploaded to the clap-back themed subreddit Murdered by Words, a defense of guns was quickly shut down by a long and harsh call out of American priorities.

All it took was this one small comment to set off a rant against the misplaced priorities of America: "So you don't want any guns in America you think the constitution is a load of sh*t?"

The call out started by laying out just how absurd it is to make it harder for women to get abortions as guns.

"As an outsider, the whole country is a sh*tbox. You've made abortion illegal, women get legally harassed by people when getting one, no matter the circumstances. If you're anything but white calling the police can get you killed, even then sometimes you're still murdered."

It then went on to lay out how police exacerbate threats of violence in the U.S.

"There's literally HUNDREDS of gun murders in every single one of your large cities every year. The police actually had the whole "protect" part taken out of their duties and look who you elected. There's cities where it is actually illegal to feed someone who is homeless, you've even developed spiked seats to stop them from sleeping out of the rain."

The response laid into how faulty and predatory the U.S. health care system is, and the absurdity of referencing a document made hundreds of years ago for modern decisions.

"It's one of the only developed countries with a medical system where a single accident can put you in debt for the rest of your life and you are STILL arguing over whether you should be giving guns to every single person because of a document from the same time when bloody castles were still effective as a national defense tool."

The not-so-gentle dismount called America a sad joke, and noted how the rest of the world sees us through a pity-filled lens.

"America only looks good to Americans. For the rest of us, it's been a joke for decades, now it's just a sad joke."

Needless to say, the original commenter didn't have any rebuttal after this long tirade against their values.

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