After breaking up with girlfriend Elizabeth Gallagher, (possible murderer) Jordan Axani was made famous for searching the internet for a replacement Elizabeth Gallagher. He has now returned from that trip and is ready to talk.
A killer (maybe) in plain sight. (Via FB)
I don't have any proof, but this guy is a murderer.
Back in November, 28-year-old Jordan Axani wanted to find someone who would be able to take advantage of the non-transferrable tickets for the round-the-world trip Axani originally planned with his then-girlfriend, Elizabeth Gallagher.
The world then watched in amazement/incredulity/horror as hundreds of Elizabeth Gallaghers applied to be his potential victim. Before long, he did find a suitable Liz Gallagher replacement: 23-year-old Elizabeth Quinn Gallagher, a younger girl who already had a boyfriend.
When he finally found this new Liz in December, I wrote:
He said he wasn't looking for a girlfriend replacement, he just wanted to "give back to the universe," and we all had to hope that "give back to the universe" did not mean "kill in cold blood and then dispose of in the Ganges."
His announcement that he found his new Liz was the last we heard from him before he took his trip on December 21st.
If the old Elizabeth Gallagher wasn't already dead, the new one definitely would be.
This week, Axani has returned from his trip and agreed to tell his story on reddit's podcast Upvoted, bringing things back to the website that started it all.
The podcast begins with an introduction by host Alexis Onhanion, bravely sitting in the same room as Axani.
"I am Jorand Axani, and I'm the focus, I suppose, of a crazy viral reddit story."
The second I heard Axani's soft, measured voice I knew it was that of a murderer. A person who was consciously trying to maintain control.
The next thing he says is he grew up in a small town north of Toronto and he "was bullied profusely in elementary and high school"
Typical serial killer start to life, and reminiscent of Dr. Evil's speech in group therapy. His confession made me feel bad for calling him a murderer. I mean, he probably is one, but now I know why and it is sad.
Axani then explained how he turned his life around by taking a bike trip by himself across Canada, and how being on his own and meeting strangers put him in touch with humanity. Being a cold and isolated outsider is what makes this guy feel connected? I bet he's tried to open a skull with a can opener.
Finally, he divulges information about the first Elizabeth Gallagher.
"We dated briefly in 2011, ummm, uh, it wasn't the right time and place. And we ended up dating a little bit more a couple years later and we were together for about a year. We decided a couple years ago that we were going to spend basically all of our money and extra time on traveling and seeing the world, basically because you only have these years once, and we both shared a fear of 'if we didn't do it now, when would we?'"
Impulsivity control problems? Another hallmark of a serial killer.
Throughout the whole ordeal, he has been notoriously been tight-lipped about the original Liz, and even begged people in his original post to leave her alone.
Why? What are you hiding, Axani? Don't want the curious media finding her body???
Jordan never explains why they broke up, and Ohanion fills in the blanks by saying "they decided they were not meant to be."
They were not meant to be what? Alive? Where is the first Elizabeth Gallagher and where is her side of the story? We have no proof that she ever existed, other than the original tickets in her name. I bet Elizabeth Gallagher is really his mom's name.
Axani explains he gave himself a month to get over the end of his relationship (i.e. kill Gallagher #1, hide her body, create an alibi, etc.), and then went about seeing if he could change the name of the ticket.
He was told that there were only three circumstances under which he could change the name: if that person got married, divorced, or died.
"Well none of those three things happened. I wasn't even going to try to lie about someone dying [nervous laughter], so I immediately cut that one off."
Aughghhhh! Who said you should try the death one, ya sicko? And why the nervous laughter? Can someone just look for the original Elizabeth, please? Her family has a right to a proper goodbye.
Then he explains how he came up with the idea to find a new Elizabeth.
"Somebody said to me that Elizabeth Gallagher is a fairly typical name, so why wouldn't you try to find somebody else with that same name and give the ticket?"
"Somebody" said this to him. The voices in his head?
He then said, "the whole table burst into laughter at the idea."
If you or anyone else you know is anthropomorphizing tables, seek help immediately.
If I'm a murderer, then why would I risk taking you to this isolated location?
(via Facebook)
The next day he thought about the idea again, thinking "That was an interesting wine-induced thought" and then went back and forth about actually posting his search to reddit.
After writing everything down, he said he read his post back to himself and had two thoughts:
"One, this is so crazy it might work, and secondly, this is just crazy."
Then he posted it.
Boi-oi-oi-oi-oing! I'm crazy!
He originally posted in reddit's travel section, where it was immediately flagged and taken down by a moderator because, "this is a Canadian issue, this has no global interest whatsoever, so you should put it in the Canada thread."
The moderator was sort of right, because only Elizabeth Gallaghers with a Canadian passport could take advantage of Axani's murder opportunity, but also not right, because a murder is the world's problem.
"Looking back on that now that's of course," Axani remembers, "thats [laughter], a very comical thing."
He then tried again in the Canada thread, and also on Facebook with the request, "Internet, don't fail me now."
When he woke up the next day, he was famous. Over 40 million people had heard of his story.
"I just remember this sinking feeling of like holy ****, is this about to blow up? Is this what the early stage of something viral looks like? CAN I KILL IT? IS IT REAL? DO I HAVE TO KILL IT?
He said the only part that bothered him was that it was leading strangers to the original Elizabeth Gallagher.
"Im a fairly private guy. I didn't mind my privacy going by the wayside here. But I hated the idea that people were going to be trying to find her and get her opinion about it."
And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for you pesky reporters trying to find my victims.
"This was implicating Elizabeth, and that was something that was really, really hard."
Well, if he says "really" twice, he must have empathy like he learned from books about human emotions.
Why did he use the word implicated? Does implicated mean something less criminal in Canada?
He says he began to sift through the hundreds of incoming applications to be the next Elizabeth Gallagher. Beyond having her name and a Canadian passport, he had another requirement of his guest,
"When you have a global story and you bring in somebody else, inevitably what is going to happen is that person would be implicated. Who ever that was would have to be ok with that."
There's that word "implicated" again...
He narrowed it down to one girl, Quinn (Elizabeth Quinn Gallagher). He said he picked her because "we got each other, we had a similar sense of humor and cadence."
Is she a murderer, too?
He said they formed a brother/sister relationship, and that "it's really the best case that could have come from it."
The second-best case? He kills her.
He then goes on to say how he was touched by many of the emails he received during his hunt, and that it inspired him to start a charitable organization that helps people take "transformative" trips. He said he wanted to use the momentum of this story to help promote ATicketForward.org, so he quickly established the site before leaving for his trip.
"I'm not a fame-seeking guy," he says. "When given the platform you have the opportunity and kind of the obligation to do something noble with it."
Just like Dexter and his code of ethics.
After pimping out his good-guy alter ego, he gives us one juicy anecdote about what acutally happened on the trip.
He told a story about how he almost "lost" the new Elizabeth Gallagher in a casino/strip club/coke den in Prague, and how when he found her four rooms deep through a maze of corridors, she was sitting on the ground, weeping.
Then the podcast ends with another plea to support his charity. The rest of the trip, and how it ended up, remains a mystery, except as he documents it on his blog. The last image we have of Quinn is at an airport in Hong Kong. Jordan posted it on his Instagram account with the comment, "Quinn doesn't wanna go home!"
We must find Elizabeth Quinn Gallagher.
Or forget about her, and just donate to his charity!