I'm the Jesse Pinkman of never giving away my money.

August 19, 2013, 9:01 am

≫ Next: Avoiding Breaking Bad spoilers online is the perfect excuse for accomplishing something at work today.

≪ Previous: My condolences to your new roommate.

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Avoiding Breaking Bad spoilers online is the perfect excuse for accomplishing something at work today.

August 19, 2013, 9:55 am

≫ Next: Best of luck over the next four or however many years it takes you to graduate.

≪ Previous: I'm the Jesse Pinkman of never giving away my money.

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Best of luck over the next four or however many years it takes you to graduate.

August 19, 2013, 11:35 am

≫ Next: Good luck on the transition from doing nothing at home to doing nothing at school.

≪ Previous: Avoiding Breaking Bad spoilers online is the perfect excuse for accomplishing something at work today.

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Good luck on the transition from doing nothing at home to doing nothing at school.

August 19, 2013, 12:40 pm

≫ Next: Sorry your post-vacation workload has completely negated all the benefits of your vacation.

≪ Previous: Best of luck over the next four or however many years it takes you to graduate.

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Sorry your post-vacation workload has completely negated all the benefits of your vacation.

August 19, 2013, 1:40 pm

≫ Next: Sorry I forgot to forget it's your birthday today.

≪ Previous: Good luck on the transition from doing nothing at home to doing nothing at school.

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Sorry I forgot to forget it's your birthday today.

August 19, 2013, 2:22 pm

≫ Next: Everytime you post a picture of yourself on vacation I secretly pray you get attacked by an assortment of exotic animals.

≪ Previous: Sorry your post-vacation workload has completely negated all the benefits of your vacation.

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Everytime you post a picture of yourself on vacation I secretly pray you get attacked by an assortment of exotic animals.

August 20, 2013, 5:01 am

≫ Next: Sorry that it costs more money to move your possessions than they're actually worth.

≪ Previous: Sorry I forgot to forget it's your birthday today.

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Sorry that it costs more money to move your possessions than they're actually worth.

August 20, 2013, 7:56 am

≫ Next: Sorry your relationship is ruining your eye makeup.

≪ Previous: Everytime you post a picture of yourself on vacation I secretly pray you get attacked by an assortment of exotic animals.

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Sorry your relationship is ruining your eye makeup.

August 20, 2013, 8:01 am

≫ Next: Hope your new roommate is a quiet masturbator.

≪ Previous: Sorry that it costs more money to move your possessions than they're actually worth.

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Hope your new roommate is a quiet masturbator.

August 20, 2013, 8:37 am

≫ Next: Just a heads up that frequent vigorous sexual activity with me is a great way to avoid the freshman fifteen.

≪ Previous: Sorry your relationship is ruining your eye makeup.

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Just a heads up that frequent vigorous sexual activity with me is a great way to avoid the freshman fifteen.

August 20, 2013, 9:12 am

≫ Next: I'm going to college so I can get a good enough job to pay for college.

≪ Previous: Hope your new roommate is a quiet masturbator.

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I'm going to college so I can get a good enough job to pay for college.

August 20, 2013, 9:25 am

≫ Next: The end of summer is much less depressing when you never had money to enjoy summer.

≪ Previous: Just a heads up that frequent vigorous sexual activity with me is a great way to avoid the freshman fifteen.

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The end of summer is much less depressing when you never had money to enjoy summer.

August 20, 2013, 10:31 am

≫ Next: If I had to have sex with someone your age, it would probably be you.

≪ Previous: I'm going to college so I can get a good enough job to pay for college.

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If I had to have sex with someone your age, it would probably be you.

August 20, 2013, 11:36 am

≫ Next: May your child's head lice recede as noticeably as your husband's hairline.

≪ Previous: The end of summer is much less depressing when you never had money to enjoy summer.

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May your child's head lice recede as noticeably as your husband's hairline.

August 20, 2013, 12:01 pm

≫ Next: Sorry the only places you visited this summer were websites.

≪ Previous: If I had to have sex with someone your age, it would probably be you.

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Sorry the only places you visited this summer were websites.

August 20, 2013, 2:05 pm

≫ Next: 11 desperately needed PSAs that would make everyone's life less awful.

≪ Previous: May your child's head lice recede as noticeably as your husband's hairline.

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11 desperately needed PSAs that would make everyone's life less awful.

August 20, 2013, 2:23 pm

≫ Next: PSA: This is what you look like when you take pictures with an iPad.

≪ Previous: Sorry the only places you visited this summer were websites.

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See them all >>

PSA: This is what you look like when you take pictures with an iPad.

August 20, 2013, 5:12 pm

≫ Next: You're the reason I come to and at work.

≪ Previous: 11 desperately needed PSAs that would make everyone's life less awful.

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You're the reason I come to and at work.

August 21, 2013, 5:01 am

≫ Next: If my sandwich doesn't have sauce I consider it a snack.

≪ Previous: PSA: This is what you look like when you take pictures with an iPad.

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If my sandwich doesn't have sauce I consider it a snack.

August 21, 2013, 7:59 am

≫ Next: PSA: Only you can prevent forest fires by never going camping.

≪ Previous: You're the reason I come to and at work.

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