Today in "holy shit, I had no idea that could happen and I guess I should be afraid of everything" news, a dolphin jumped onto a family's boat, and it did not go well.
The attacking dolphin and the attacked humans.
(via The OC Register / The OC Sheriff's Dept)
Allow me to start this with some good news and a warning (that's also how I like to start all of my first dates). The good news: Everyone is alive, human and dolphin alike. The warning: If you keep reading this article, you're going to see blood on a boat.
Here's what happened: recently, the Frickmans — parents Dirk and Chrissie, and kids Tristan and Courtney — were enjoying a lovely afternoon in their boat off of Dana Point, CA, when a pod of dolphins started swimming around them. This was a lot of fun until one of the dolphins jumped inside. Authorities aren't sure why it happened — Harbor Patrol Sgt. DJ Haldeman guessed that "something must have scared it out" of the water. Or maybe the dolphin was angry that land mammals were on its turf surf. Either way, the lovely day quickly turned into an epic dolphin-human battle.
Well, I never knew I could be this terrified by a picture of a dolphin.
(via OC Sherriff on Twitter)
Flopping around on the deck of the small boat, the dolphin started hitting the people on board. Dirk Frickman said that the dolphin "hit my wife and knocked her over, and punched my daughter." In fact, the dolphin didn't just knock Chrissie over, it broke both of her ankles, a move that I think would make even mobsters cringe (note to self: look into dolphin mob). The dolphin also managed to cut itself up quite a bit — the blood you see in the picture above is the dolphin's.
Thankfully, everything turned out as well as it could — Dirk Frickman was able to call the Orange County Sheriff's Department Harbor Patrol, which helped him pull the dolphin up to a dock and release it back into the ocean, where it reportedly "swam away with no problem":
Chrissie Frickman is still recovering. Today's lesson: dear goodness, do not screw around with dolphins.