Two of Gryffindor and Slytherin's most famous faces are at it again.
Tom Felton, aka Draco Malfoy, has a new movie coming out called Risen, in which he is again cast as a guy who gets in a lot of face-to-face altercations with someone more popular than him:
After the trailer was released, fellow Harry Potter alum Matthew Lewis, aka Neville Longbottom (more like Neville Hotbottom, amirite?), tweeted this at his former co-star:
So sweet. Not only do they tweet at each other, they apparently also still hang. Tom Felton responded to Matt's well-wishes by alluding to some sort of game planned for the weekend, writing:
Half of these hairstyles are legit fall trends predicted by fashion experts. Half are completely made up.
All require robust financial resources and a steady hand. Can you tell which ones are real? (Scroll all the way down for the answers.)
1. Bronde
Not brown. Not blonde. Bronde. Do you understand why it's called "bronde"? Do you get it?
2. Wet Look
This style uses gel to slick back hair so it appears damp, like you just hopped out of a shower, ocean, or rainstorm.
3. Bean Bagging
Two mini buns evoke everyone's favorite type of dorm room furniture.
4. Babylights
These micro highlights around the hairline and crown imitate the natural streaks kids get from playing in the sun. All the hair benefits of childhood without the lack of agency.
5. Moonlights
These chunky all-over highlights mimic the natural way that moonlight shines on tresses. This is a great look if you don't get outside at night during the full moon as much as you mean to.
6. Creamy Yellow
This very light golden hue has so much white in it, it's like cream. Or a lovely, light, unripe corn on the cob.
7. Soft Bloods
Deep blood red shades balanced with subtle auburn highlights are dominating the runways. Not recommended for those who get queasy easily.
8. Deconstructed Chignon
The classic formal updo is transformed by messing it up.
9. Upside Down Roots
Natural haircolor is visible at the tips instead of the crown for a funky, unique effect. This can also be achieved by only letting people look at you while turning their head upside down.
10. Tortoiseshell
Caramel, cinnamon, chocolate, chestnut, and other delicious-sounding golden brown tones are combined to look like a tortoise's shell.
11. Frizz Digest
A variety of curl shapes and patterns are combined for a lively style. Frizz is lame if it's an accident, but cool if it's on purpose and takes a long time.
12. Snooze Button
This look mimics how hair naturally appears when a person presses the snooze button so many times that there's no time to do anything to it before work.
Why go to all the trouble of writing "k" when you could just select a smiley face with sunglasses on? These people went the other way with emoji and made some impressive works of art in miniature.
Long story short, novelist Anthony Horowitz has been hired by Ian Fleming's estate to continue the James Bond books, keeping as close as possible to the style of the original 007 novels.
Horowitz gave a big interview to the Daily Mail about writing Bond and restoring him to his "shamelessly macho killing machine" days. They also discussed the movies.
He's a big Daniel Craig fan, but of famed English actor Idris Elba, he had this to say: "For me, Idris Elba is a bit too rough to play the part. It’s not a colour issue. I think he is probably a bit too “street” for Bond. Is it a question of being suave? Yeah."
Well, when you put it that way, it seems so simple.
http://www.hulu.com/watch/838716
You might have heard that over the past few days, a lot of famous people have said a lot of things about a lot of other famous people, which sometimes made them sad. The previous sentence was a pretty evocative summary of everything that's been going on, in my opinion, but Jimmy Kimmel went into a little more detail last night on his show. He explained exactly who said what at the VMAs, and linked celebrity feuds with the poop emoji forevermore.
According to Anthony Horowitz, the writer of an upcoming James Bond novel, Idris Elba is "too street" to play Bond.
Similar to the way fans started campaigning for Donald Glover to playSpider-Man, there has been a fan campaign for Idris Elba to play James Bond in an upcoming movie.
The current writer of the Bond novels, Anthony Horowitz, was asked about his opinions on the campaign by The Daily Mail (Ian Fleming is dead, so the people who own the rights to the character commission other authors to write new Bond novels). Horowitz told them the following:
For me, Idris Elba is a bit too rough to play the part. It’s not a colour issue. I think he is probably a bit too “street” for Bond. Is it a question of being suave? Yeah.
It was pretty messed up thing to say, seeing as terms like "street" or "thug" often have racial connotations, and also because it shortchanges Elba's acting chops and his ability to play different characters. Horowitz was quick to apologize on Twitter:
The Star Wars Facebook moderator felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror, and responded perfectly.
The user deleted the comment, and hopefully learned a valuable lesson. He is presumably in hiding, possibly on the ice planet of Hoth.
Either Britney's developed a foot fetish, or she has her own style of fierceness.
Britney Spears's Las Vegas residency is in full force right now, and the 33-year-old is arguably at the top of her powers. More so than ever before, she's confident and in charge. She's also single as all hell, and she'll be the first to tell you – she's not ready to mingle. These days are all about Brit.
That's why, in this clip from her show on August 26, she unleashes with a very powerful, but oddly specific, put-down for all the world's dudes.
https://instagram.com/p/64E9gKQFH9/
That's right, fellas. You can suck her fucking toe. What does that mean? It means putting her foot in your mouth and applying pressure. Beyond that, we're stumped. Britney clearly is confident in saying it, though, because this isn't the first time. She said the same thing in another concert on August 22, which was also captured on video (skip to 1:04 to hear it):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENXBJpVsjjU
It's great to see Britney being so empowered, but her choice of words might come back to haunt her. The Internet is full of foot fetishists who would be all too willing to suck her toe. Need proof? Check out the more than 2,000 user-uploaded Britney Spears photos on wikiFeet, the celebrity feet website.
And if you find you're still looking through wikiFeet an hour after reading this, congratulations on learning something new about yourself.
Have you ever been to Port Authority? It's gross and weird.
If you're traveling to or from NYC, I highly recommend taking literally any other form of transportation besides a bus that pulls into Port Authority Bus Terminal. Train, car, Segway, camel, even walking across the George Washington Bridge would be more pleasurable than spending time in Port Authority. Some parts of the Port Authority smell like a cigarette that was lit in 1979 and has been burning ever since. And I'm pretty sure all the farts from Times Square are pumped directly into the bus terminal on 40th Street & 9th Avenue.
Once in 2004 I was waiting for a bus to my parents' house and two kids were running around. They were dividing their time evenly between chugging Mountain Dew, eating Cheetos, and darting across the terminal. I kept thinking "one of these kids is going to puke," and then one of them did. A man came to mop up the vomit with a bucket full of water that looked like it had never been changed. I thought to myself, "I hope no one goes near that spot," and then I witnessed both kids sit directly on the former puke-spot and start playing with dinosaur figurines.
So yeah, not an ideal place for romance. But I like a challenge, so I asked a guy to meet me there for our first date. I showed up for the date early, just to make sure we would have somewhere to sit and talk besides aboard a bus driving away from the dismal bus depot. As I walked around, I witnessed a man getting arrested, probably for the crime of attempting to bring a ray of sunlight into this dark, low-ceilinged wasteland. Then I found this place, down by gate 78:
Although Snacks 'N Wheels piqued my interest, I settled on McAnn's because it was a real bar, and we would both need to consume some alcohol.
I came back up to street level to meet my date, and a man wearing only a hospital gown and sneakers started following me, staggering as he pointed to his wristband. When I didn't respond to him, he walked into Au Bon Pain where I hope he got the help he needed. It was definitely unsettling, but not out of the ordinary for Port Authority.
I met my date and we headed for McAnn's, where we drank tequila while two guys played pool behind us. The men playing pool were quite a duo; one was well over 7 feet tall and the other was about 5'6", and when Hozier's "Take Me To Church" came on they both sang along with so much heart. My date and I exchanged a look, basically letting each other know we thought it was really funny but we should NOT laugh out loud because he would probably get beat up.
At one point, the shorter guy scratched and when he smacked the pool table, an ancient plume of dust appeared that didn't settle for a whole minute. For a moment, I was positive we'd entered a vortex.
We left the bar and wandered around the bus station, where we saw this odd piece of art, depicting people waiting to go through a door or something? I don't know. Nothing in this place makes sense. We decided the statues are actually real people who are frozen in time, and anyone who stays in the terminal too long turns to stone.
My date and I decided to explore the upper levels as well. We went up to the top floor, which is a great place to go if you like exhaust fumes, frighteningly narrow escalators, and buses that are maybe driven by ghosts. As we stood at the top of Port Authority looking down, my date informed me that sometimes escalators eat people. Did you know that?! It's terrifying. Be careful on escalators, guys.
We had come to the end of the attractions at the bus station, but on our way out we found what we decided was a missed connection:
In case you can't see it on your phone:
I hope Fernanda sees this red-Sharpied message and reconnects with her true love. As for me, my date and I had such a good time we headed across the street to a bar called Beer Authority to keep drinking and talking. The date was sort of romantic, but mostly just because we were both making fun of all the same stuff in this strange parallel universe we decided to explore. Is that romance? I'm asking honestly, because I know so very little about romance.
I don't know if it was because of, or despite going on a date to the grossest place in the city, but I'm still seeing the guy I took to Port Authority. It's been over three weeks, so it's already my third longest relationship. For real.
You'd think the people who run the Auschwitz Memorial would have a process where every time they add a new feature, they ask themselves: Hang on, is this going to seem insensitive about the Holocaust?
Apparently, that's not the case, based on their new misting showers to cool down hot tourists waiting in line at the former Polish Nazi concentration camp [updated to more clearly reflect that the Nazis were the bad guys here], which is now a Holocaust museum. The showers are upsetting Israeli tourists who find them reminiscent of gas chambers used to kill Jews and others in large numbers during World War II. As one man told the Jerusalem Post: "All the Israelis felt this was very distasteful. Someone called it a 'Holocaust gimmick.'"
The folks who run the Auschwitz Memorial took to Facebook to explain that it was all just a big misunderstanding, they were just trying to keep people from fainting during a heat wave, and anyway that's not even how gas chambers worked:
Sure, good point about Zyklon B, guys. Still, you might have had less trouble with angry tourists if you'd chosen to keep them cool with, say, shady awnings or water fountains or free mini electric fans. Something to remember for next summer.
Writer Maggie Serota got a message on OKCupid from a guy who had done an enormous amount of work to find out more than she wanted to share.
You can read Serota's tweets below, in which she starts to parse out the unnerving message she received on her private OKCupid account from a very avid fan, who also seems to be saying they would never date anyway. Because of her taste in music. Not because he's an obsessed weirdo, that's fine!
There's a lot to read, but here's one of the best quotes from his first message:
"I've come across your tweets, Maggie, occasionally and tangentially, from conversations on basketball twitterdotcom. Happened again this morning, can't even remember where it originated now, but as other times I was more intrigued by your avi than your attempts, successful or not, at humor. Despite the huge sunglasses and the small phone screen. Typical shallow male, as I'm sure you're plenty used to. Anywho, this time it led me to take a look at your timeline, the intrigue now growing with your wit, eclectic retweets, sensibility and cats. Then the okc tweets were fun and poignant and eye opening - wow she's there/here? Too much intrigue, but how old is she and what does she look like behind those dark lenses? Googling was necessary and so easy."
Since Serota shared the letter, she's been getting a lot of hateful messages from folks who say she exposed this dude, though there was no identifying info in his messages. Even the guy himself wrote her to say it was her own fault that he cyber stalked her:
If it were me, though, and I'd wanted to keep my online dating profile anonymous and separate from my social media presence, a fully reasonable desire, I would not repeatedly talk about said profile on social media.
Nothing is private anymore! Especially your sexy dating profile/life. So do the smart thing: when you ask a person out on a date, pretend you've never Googled them.
While a pop star like Taylor Swift may be gathering “musicians, actresses, models, entrepreneurs,” she said, “I’m not trying to be in the squad.” She continued, “None of my friends are famous and not because of any other reason than I just like real people who are living real lives, because I’m inspired by them.”
Then the reporter was probably like, "I asked you what you do to get ready before a show." Then Miley was probably like, "Have you heard that I smoke a ton of weed because I just love feeling high due to drugs?" Then the reporter probably accepted that newspapers are dying and got a job as a software engineer.
Summer's almost over, but here's how to seem mildly competent at food in just 10 minutes for your Labor Day get-together.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q6vVuj3iggE
Not only did I not know it was possible for someone to do this (to be fair, I hadn't given it much thought), I certainly didn't know it was possible for someone like me to do this. YouTube how-to guy Mark Rober's method is easy as hell and looks really cool. Even if you already guessed how to do it, the video is worth it for this:
Uncle humor. Like dad humor but without the baggage.
Let's just say "Hello" was an effective opening line with Blanche Devereaux.
When it comes to tough reporting gigs, re-watching all of The Golden Girls doesn't sound tough, but keep in mind this was a seven-season network television show. That's a lot of episodes and a lot of canned laughs for the folks at Refinery29 to dig through. While watching, they recorded every reference to past lovers and husbands, as well of mentions of successful dates and conquests during the show's run. If you haven't seen the show, maybe this will entice you, since there is no way anyone on Girls has boned anywhere near this number. If you have, the rankings probably won't surprise you, but the numbers will.
Specifically the number 263, which is the total. Whoah. You might think that averages out to an average of just under 66 dudes per Girl, but that's not even close.
Which is to say, it's pretty much all Blanche at an applause-worthy 165.
Dorothy Zbornak shtupped a healthy 43.
Rose Nylund admitted 30 men into her select-club.
And Sophia Petrillo only found 25 men worthy, although one can only guess how many hearts she laid to waste.
We're still not really clear on what the hell Mooloolaba is. Is it a town? A resort? A frame of mind? A poorly conceived viral video that will forever associate the word "Mooloolaba" with lying liars who lie and don't use a condom?
If you could ask your ex anything in the world, would you film it and make a viral video?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CfdlIMlPmuA
These exes asking each other honest questions has everything you want in a viral video: sadness, crying, regret, and more. Glamour set up an interview between two college sweethearts who dated for seven years but now have been broken up for two. We start right out of the gate with the guy insisting he "did not, like, do the act of cheating," before immediately admitting to doing "hand stuff" and "mouth stuff." Normally I try not to negatively judge people based on what they're wearing, but this guy is being such a jerk that I feel fine saying his hat is stupid.
We also hear unexplained references to "Burly," "Laura," "Ian's room," "Rebecca and Winston," and "Marsha." It kind of seems like they were coached to name-drop as many of their friends as possible to weave together this depressing tapestry of their time together.