It's crazy that no one has tried this before: a man got backstage at a Peking Duk concert in Australia last week and drank beers with the band in the greenroom after showing the guard a Wikipedia page he covertly edited to say that he was related to a member of the band. That's some Jessica Jones-level sneakiness right there.

David Spargo, a fan of the electronic group, showed a skeptical guard his ID and the Wikipedia page for the band, which listed him as a step-brother of band member Reuben Styles. What the guard didn't know is that Spargo himself edited the page just a few moments prior. "It was probably the most genius, mastermind move that I’ve ever witnessed," said Adam Hyde, Styles’ bandmate, to The Guardian. "It’s crazy. He just did it on the spot, in a second on his phone."

By the way, this band is huge in Australia, their home country—Peking Duk's single from last year, "High," went triple platinum in your-favorite-country-that's-also-a-continent. So this would be like if someone was able to pull off this stunt with Drake while he was in Toronto.

The band, for their part, was totally cool with someone outwitting their guard.

Paul Mason is a former model who now spends his Christmas season as "Fashion Santa" at the Yorkdale Shopping Centre in Toronto, Canada. Shoppers love it, and the mall has made it a charitable cause: for every person who snaps a selfie with Paul and posts it on social media using the hashtag #YorkdaleFashionSanta, Yorkdale donates $1 to the SickKids Foundation. For that reason, as well as his obvious attractiveness, this is the best new take on a mall Santa, far better than the creepy robotic version. 

Mason explained that it takes people a moment to get adjusted to a modern Santa:

You get people that are a little confused. But once they think about it for a second, they warm up.

They certainly do warm up. Here are some glamor shots and selfies with the fashion Santa himself:

By the looks of the captions, a few shoppers would rather be naughty than nice with Fashion Santa. Maybe next year he can get some assistance from sexy elves.

People often assume that Chris Herbert, a U.K. soldier who lost his leg in Iraq, hates Muslims. While the media continues to indulge Donald Trump's dangerous Islamophobia, people like Herbert are on social media, dropping real truth. Herbert wrote a Facebook post to shut down the prejudiced people who assume that he is prejudiced, and now that post has gone viral, garnering over 7,300 shares in just 7 hours. He makes a great argument against generalizations by sharing some generalizations of his own.

He writes,

Getting frustrated by some people expecting racism from me, because I got blown up. Here it is:

Yes. A Muslim man blew me up, and I lost my leg.

A Muslim man also lost his arm that day wearing a British Uniform.
A Muslim medic was in the helicopter that took me from the field
A Muslim surgeon performed the surgery that saved my life
A Muslim Nurse was part of the team that helped me when I returned to the UK
A Muslim Healthcare Assistant was part of the team that sorted out my day to day needs in rehabilitation when I was learning to walk
A Muslim taxi driver gave me a free ride the first time I went for a beer with my Dad after I came home.
A Muslim doctor offered my Dad comfort and advice in a pub, when he didnt know how to deal with my medicines and side effects.

Contrary to that, 
A white brit spat in my girlfriends face for 'fucking a cripple when you could have me [him]'
A White brit pushed my wheelchair away from a lift so he could use it first.
A White brit screamed at my Dad for parking in a disabled bay when I was in the services coming home
(Although, alot of people helped in my recovery! I dont hate white brits either! hahaha)

Point is, fuck off. I know who I dislike, and I know who I dont. I know who I appreciate, and I know who I dont. If you want to hate an entire race of men and women for the actions of a few dickheads feel free, but don't push your views on me, thinking I am an easy target because one douchebag decided it was my day to die.

Blaming all Muslims for the actions of groups like Daeshe and the Taliban, is like blaming all Christians for the actions of the KKK or Westboro Baptist Church. 
Get a grip of your lives, hug your family and get back to work.

Herbert is continuing to be charming and truth-telling in his post's comments section:

1. He's taking the fame in stride:

2. He's sorry about the swearing:

3. He knows more about the U.S. Constitution than most Americans:

4. And he's ready to meet some ladies:

If you still doubt his sense of humor, check out his profile picture:

This kid was just taking a chill stroll through the snow when this cat was seized by the spirit of John Cena. Watch as the feline sneaks up from behind and leaps onto the kid's back, pulling her down with the might of nine cats. What a jabroni.

The video has it labeled as a "body slam," but it technically seems to be more of a headlock driver.

This has been the latest installment of cats being d*cks. 

It's so tempting to be wacky on Tinder, because you're probably not going to meet the love of your life on there. Unless the love of your life is interested in dating a carpet or a glass of red wine. At the very least you're amusing all the casual swipers as you dance your merry way to eternal singledom. The people on this list might be too silly, imaginary, and weird for relationships, but we love them. Happy New Year's to the best Tinderers of 2015. We hope you find someone to kiss at midnight!

1. She brings the milk AND the cookies.

2. Kim Davis's sloppy seconds.

3. The subtext is "steal my underwear."

5. You won't believe it's not butter (it's really a person pretending to be butter).

6. This girl reenacting "Face/Off."

7. Feta Wap wants to make you his Trap Cheese.

8. Ugh, group pictures.

9. Someone has definitely told him.

10. This brick just wants to get laid.

11. Who knows what is even going on here?

12. This guy who is just too real.

13. What a dog.

14. Enough, no one wants to have sex when they're binge-watching OITNB.

15. "Run, Forest, run into my arms!"

16. Bathroom selfies are so weird.

17. Is there a down swipe?

The only thing that all weddings have in common is that every couple makes it their own, whether its in the theme, the destination, or the infinite variation of family members getting drunk and quarreling that can happen at the reception. For John Taylor, he knew he couldn't walk down the aisle with his bride Lisa this September without honoring the other significant other in his life, his best mate Andy Pemberton.

John and Lisa had hired photographer Katie Bryam, who came by to shoot a traditional groom-and-groomsmen-getting-ready sequence. Beforehand, John told BuzzFeed, "I told her that we may want to take a couple of ‘funny’ shots. I don’t think she realized that she would be photographing two naked blokes in twin bathtubs.”

Friends for 12 years, the two men from northeastern England were more than ready for Bryam's photoshoot. As she told the Huffington Post, "When I turned up at their hotel room John opened the door in a bathrobe and said with a cheeky smile, 'Hello, Katie, we've been expecting you.'" After that, it was a whirlwind 20 minutes of rushing from picture to picture to create the now-viral album.

"The whole shoot was led by them," Byram sad, "We were roaring with laughter through much of it." As for the groom (and lead singer/guitarist in the band Last Anthem, who played his own wedding), he got what he was looking for: "Katie completely understood what we were all about and just went along with it -- and sometimes even encouraged it a bit more."

Groom & Best Man Take Their Bromance To Next Level w/ Photo Shoot (Photos) https://t.co/3CLFTVgJfepic.twitter.com/pDijxoSlpD

— Instinct Magazine (@instinctmag) December 7, 2015

The photographer lauded the two men on Facebook for being "such good sports," although she also gave credit to the real trooper here, John's wife Lisa. "I think Lisa knows that Andy comes as part of the package."

For more photos from the wedding, visit Katie Byram online.

The famed annual calendar from the Pirelli company has attracted a lot of press for transitioning from supermodels to "sheros" in the past few years, a category that this year included both comedian Amy Schumer in front of the lens and a very powerful lady behind the camera: Annie Liebovitz, famous portrait photographer. She took this incredible pic of Schumer, who like a few other subjects, opted to go do the shoot clad only in (some) underwear:

And more:

Schumer's original post about her image was pretty sincere, but today she jokingly shared this behind-the-scenes image from her day at Pirelli writing, "Seems I'm an absolute pleasure to shoot." You can see Liebovitz on the left with her mouth hanging open.

She's probably just telling Schumer to stand up straight or something, but it's pretty funny to imagine the serious, renowned photographer dealing with Amy Schumer's fart jokes.

Benedict Cumberbatch has concern for his fellow man, unlike the high-functioning sociopath he plays on TV. To celebrate Cumberchristmas, Cumberbatch wrote a beautiful letter to Santa Claus (which is pronounced "Father Christmas" in England). In a world where children are burdened by a lack of privacy, global crises, and environmental ruin, Cumberbatch is worried about the future. His wish for them? To "stretch the moment of magic and playfulness."

Here's the full letter:

Dear Father Christmas,

So my friend has asked me to write to you… I have to confess it’s been hard to know what to say. Mainly because like most adults I feel preposterous asking anything of you because our time with you is surely done. Now we get our own presents, control our own fates, take responsibility for our own actions, and live in the world we have created… so it’s not for us to turn around and plead for your help with the environment, the migrant crisis, the NHS, education, food banks, human rights, fundamentalism and wars. Though God knows we need all the help we can get with all these man-made problems and more.

And it’s not that you aren’t compassionate and full of joy. You’re great. In spite of you being changed into different colours for corporations and being bastardised to represent materialism gone mad—despite probably originating in some season based pagan druid ritual a million thought miles from requests for spontaneously combusting hoverboards… Kidadults cynically pointing this out after having their moment of belief in you are wasting everyone’s precious time. Because you are not for them. You are for the children. Children who need some magic in a world were the borders between innocence and responsibility, playful imagination and cold, adult obstacles are continually shrinking.

This is what I’d like to ask you to help with. A little more time for children to be children. Stretch the moment of magic and playfulness. Distract them from the realities of a world gone mad so that they can laugh with their breath rather than sob with their tears. Especially those caring for family members, or suffering illness, hunger or poverty. Especially those hiding in buildings as bombs rain down, or being handed shaking with fear or cold into a boat to escape environmental disaster or war. Please help to light up their worlds with a moment of joy and hope.

When I think about it you’ve got it tough this year… And when I really think about it I’m not sure that asking you for a lightsaber and getting one (not that I ever did by the way) is equatable with controlling the space time continuum and making the good of childhood last a little longer.

But you do inspire wonder and awe amongst those that write you letters and go to sleep hoping there might be a new object in their possession come dawn. You inspire good behaviour and, at least in my memory, some desperate last minute attempts to redeem bad behaviour so as not to be overlooked. Spare a thought too for those millions who want to write to you but through illiteracy can’t. Hear their words and help to give them the time and chance to learn how to read and write so they can better their lives and escape their impoverished beginnings.

I feel a little sorry for you. And I guess I’ve done exactly what I said I wouldn’t… Asked you to help with adult problems and solve some of the greatest worries we have for our children. I promise to leave some extra port and mince pies for you!

Lots of love

Benedict x

P.S. Please could I have that lightsaber now?

One of the perks of having 47 million Instagram followers is that if you want to find out the identity of an attractive woman, you can ask Internet to do the work for you. Yesterday, Justin Bieber shared a photo of this mystery woman, along with the devastatingly witty caption of "Omg who is this!!" A cursory review of the picture confirms that she is, in fact, very pretty. Also, just to get this out of the way: Come on! She looks like Selena Gomez!

Commenters quickly identified the woman as someone named Cindy Kimberly, who was already doing pretty well on Instagram under the name "wolfiecindy" with 128,000 followers. So far, so good. But! BUT! Here's where it gets shady. There's also another private Instagram account called "wolfiecindyreal" with 236,000 followers. Both accounts are claiming to be the person in the photo. According to the Daily Mail, the first (public) wolfiecindy commented, "I so do not know how to deal with this but I only have instagram and tumblr so whatever other stuff people are finding is fake."

For her part, the private wolfiecindyreal accoint claims in her bio that she is the person in the Bieber selfie.

It's all very cryptic, and maybe in the end it will turn out that everyone is just a catfishing sexbot (or that we've all been sexbots the entire time!). But we can say conclusively that the photo might be of a social media personality named Cindy who either exists or doesn't exist. Conclusively.

Either way, Bieber is probably just trying to make Selena Gomez jealous after she made out with that dude from One Direction.

It's the ultimate fantasy: rolling up to an exclusive event, glammed up in couture, ready to revel in the cheers of the adoring public, and then handing a half-eaten cheeseburger to an assistant to keep it warm as you pose. Selena Gomez is living the dream.

Look closer:

Gomez has an assistant specializing in the cheeseburger holding arts, standing strong with a firm grasp.

It's the coolest glamor shot of a cheeseburger since this...

...and a better red carpet beau than Bieber.

The holidays can be a lonely time if you're single, so can you really blame this deer for trying to put the moves on Rudolph? Of course not. This real deer from Michigan ran into a Christmas lawn ornament version of Santa's bioluminescent lead caribou this morning, Detroit's WDIV reported, and you can see the doe actually do a double-take when she spots the red-nosed hunk. It's kind of like that moment in Sleepless in Seattle when Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks lock eyes for the first time. 

When Rudolph gives the deer the cold shoulder (due to, you know, his being a lawn ornament), she does what any thirsty doe would do and turns her attention toward the white, antlered buck to his left. She starts kissing on him and everything in full view of Rudolph.

Don't hate the player, doe. Hate the reindeer games.

People still send Christmas cards. But, recognizing that they're an outdated institution, many who do so try to be funny. Nine times out of 10, these cards fail to elicit a laugh. These are different. These make for legit ho-ho-ha-ha-lolz.

1. Tis better to drink than to receive.

2. A new kind of holy family.

3. (Wild) Turkey is ready.

4. A Falkor Kind of Christmas.

5. Xmas.

6. Headline.

7. The Bacon Brothers.

8. Back to nature.

9. Toeing the line.

10. Human Pyramid: Third Sequence.

11. Santa, u up?

12. Christmas is kind of ruff.

13. Kill it with fire.

14. Weed wish you a merry Christmas.

15. Can't put our finger on it.

Russia has given France a new puppy following the death of their seven-year-old police dog, Diesel, which was killed during a terror raid in the Paris suburb of Saint-Denis last month. The puppy, Dobrynya, was given as a sign of solidarity between the two nations as part of a Western coalition battling ISIS. Dobrynya will continue his police dog training in France. The French Ambassador to Russia was extremely grateful for the gift:

The puppy you are giving us today will replace Diesel and proves your friendship. Paris is waiting for him.

The puppy gets his name from a fictional knight in Russian folklore. Just look at the size of the paws on that thing. Hopefully he keeps his Russian accent so he can sound like a total mercenary badass at French police dog school.

Whatever your perspective on the second amendment, it's hard to argue that the world wouldn't be a better place if everyone woke up tomorrow and discovered that all weapons had turned into sex toys. Violent deaths would drop drastically (though bank robberies might still persist) and maybe more men would be able to give women orgasms. If John Lennon was alive today, these would be the lyrics to "Imagine (2015 Version)." Well, Slack senior editor Matt Haughey shares this vision and wants to make beautiful art from its realization—by taking photos of Republican politicians posing with guns and photoshopping the guns into dildos. 

Seriously. (Also, obviously, NSFW images below.)

He's sharing his work at the Tumblr #GOPdildo. I'm shocked that username was available.

We can't wait to see the image of Sarah Palin using a dildo on a moose. What? She's a hunter!

Arnold Schwarzenegger, a man who has both been Governor of California and given birth to a baby on screen, has some wise words for all the haters who are still skeptical about climate change. On Monday he shared a long-ass note on his Facebook page that even Mark Zuckerberg liked:

Though he's known as The Terminator, Arnold (spoiler alert) wants us all to keep living on this beautiful planet. The only thing he actually wants to terminate is our dependence on fossil fuels, and he's not afraid to almost cuss to get his point across:

He writes first about how he knows climate change is controversial:

I don’t give a **** if we agree about climate change. I see your questions. Each and every time I post on my Facebook page or tweet about my crusade for a clean energy future, I see them.

There are always a few of you, asking why we should care about the temperature rising, or questioning the science of climate change. I want you to know that I hear you. Even those of you who say renewable energy is a conspiracy. Even those who say climate change is a hoax. Even those of you who use four letter words.

But Arnie is tired of everyone else's questions, and has a few of his own:

Let's put climate change aside for a minute. In fact, let's assume you're right.

First - do you believe it is acceptable that 7 million people die every year from pollution? That's more than murders, suicides, and car accidents - combined. Every day, 19,000 people die from pollution from fossil fuels. Do you accept those deaths? Do you accept that children all over the world have to grow up breathing with inhalers?

Now, my second question: do you believe coal and oil will be the fuels of the future? Besides the fact that fossil fuels destroy our lungs, everyone agrees that eventually they will run out. What's your plan then?

Then he busts on Blockbuster:

I, personally, want a plan. I don't want to be like the last horse and buggy salesman who was holding out as cars took over the roads. I don't want to be the last investor in Blockbuster as Netflix emerged. That's exactly what is going to happen to fossil fuels.

Then there's a whole bunch of blah blah blah about the economy, but let's skip ahead to his final question:

There are two doors. Behind Door Number One is a completely sealed room, with a regular, gasoline-fueled car. Behind Door Number Two is an identical, completely sealed room, with an electric car. Both engines are running full blast. I want you to pick a door to open, and enter the room and shut the door behind you. You have to stay in the room you choose for one hour. You cannot turn off the engine. You do not get a gas mask.

I'm guessing you chose the Door Number Two, with the electric car, right? Door number one is a fatal choice - who would ever want to breathe those fumes? This is the choice the world is making right now.

To use one of the four-letter words all of you commenters love, I don't give a damn if you believe in climate change. I couldn’t care less if you're concerned about temperatures rising or melting glaciers. It doesn't matter to me which of us is right about the science.

I just hope that you'll join me in opening Door Number Two, to a smarter, cleaner, healthier, more profitable energy future.

Look, he's from the future. He knows what he's talking about.

Christine McConnell, a Los Angeles based "Artist-Photographer-Baker," swagged out her parents' house with Christmas style. She decorated it gingerbread, peppermints, and icing, all of which look delicious even though they are made of inedible material. Pictures of her projects have received almost a million views on Imgur and tens of thousands of likes on Instagram. McConnell has become somewhat of a celebrity of social media for her projects, which isn't surprising, since they're very, very elaborate. Judging by her making-of photos, the house took quite some time.

Taken as a whole, it's pretty beautiful, but in a creepy Tim Burton way:

McConnell's work often deals with the eerie. She did her parents' house for Halloween a few months ago:

And a past project features her as a severed mannequin head:

She's also releasing a book called Deceptive Desserts in March, showcasing different cakes and pastries that look creepy but taste delicious:

It seems fair to say that her oeuvre is David Lynch meets Good Housekeeping.