Twitter strikes back at Ted Cruz for his dumb comments about 'New York values.'

January 15, 2016, 1:50 pm

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≪ Previous: A senior center executive dressed up a guy as an elderly woman for a press conference. People figured it out.

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Ted Cruz put people in the uncomfortable position of siding with Donald Trump when, at Thursday's Republican debate, he attacked Trump by attacking New Yorkers. In an attempt to undermine his opponent's conservative credentials, Cruz said that Trump couldn't be the Republican nominee because he embodies "New York values," which "are socially liberal, are pro-abortion, are pro-gay marriage, are focused on money." This has to be the lamest euphemism for "nonwhite, non-heterosexual, non-Christian" yet.

Trump fired back by saying that there are in fact conservatives in Manhattan. Unsurprisingly, he also invoked 9/11. He then called out Cruz's comment as offensive, and smart people were surprised to find themselves agreeing with him.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gu4rORNET54&feature=youtu.be

After Trump defended New York, more eloquent New Yorkers took to Twitter to do it properly. The Daily News got the ball rolling by telling Cruz how Lady Liberty really feels.

https://twitter.com/NYDailyNews/status/687956281596985344

New Yorkers joined in with tributes to the city, both funny and sincere.

Some New York values are ideas:

https://twitter.com/BPEricAdams/status/688003872481214464https://twitter.com/JenAshleyWright/status/687984352244969472https://twitter.com/lindsaygoldwert/status/687864157669093376https://twitter.com/MarkHarrisNYC/status/687054811385171968https://twitter.com/robdelaney/status/688002751402512384

And some New York values are deeds:

https://twitter.com/pattonoswalt/status/687832481333030912https://twitter.com/morninggloria/status/688000646767886336https://twitter.com/jfreewright/status/688033026459176960

People came to the city's defense, pointing out how Cruz's idea of "New York Values" is basically a weak euphemism for diversity and tolerance.

https://twitter.com/MrJoshCharles/status/687832896980258816https://twitter.com/mikerotman/status/687836191366840320https://twitter.com/HireMeImFunny/status/688015980593831937https://twitter.com/LiberalGribble/status/688006995094421504https://twitter.com/fakedansavage/status/687832302852804611https://twitter.com/Ihnatko/status/688065854924308484https://twitter.com/jfreewright/status/688039799475814400

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Finally, a mom who says what everyone's thinking about parenting: it's way too easy.

January 15, 2016, 2:00 pm

≫ Next: There's a compelling conspiracy theory that David Bowie predicted Kanye.

≪ Previous: Twitter strikes back at Ted Cruz for his dumb comments about 'New York values.'

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If you've never heard the portmanteau "sanctimommy," you can probably figure it out without too much googling. It refers—of course—to a sanctimonious mommy, a person all too eager to share her parenting logic with other mothers and the world at large. Parenting website Scary Mommy just discovered the quintessential sanctimommy, a woman who just doesn't get what all the fuss about raising kids is about.

https://www.facebook.com/sanctimommy/photos/a.523539037666475.114351.523533471000365/1052572534763120/?type=3&theater

Uploaded to a Facebook page apparently dedicated to reposting the social media rants of these ubiquitous "sanctimothers," the comments revealed a whole lot of hatred for this know-it-all, who really only knows what it's like to have a newborn. One woman responded with the lengthy yet succinct comment:

I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in I'm only 2 weeks in

Another mother reveled in the woman's future comeuppance, "Boy she's gonna regret that post when it shows up on her time hop in about 2 years..."

And one more mom explained the only way to really feel that level of confidence about parenthood:

I only knew one chick who could do it all... two kids under 5, fabulous professional career, successful side business, still had time for art and hobbies and volunteering, endless amounts of energy and enthusiasm... a supermom who made me feel like crap in comparison!! And then I found out it was just cocaine. tongue emoticon I felt waaaaaaaaaaay better after that!

Mom-on-mom crime at its finest.

There's a compelling conspiracy theory that David Bowie predicted Kanye.

January 15, 2016, 2:20 pm

≫ Next: Gals are going bananas over this hot guy who adopted a rescue cat.

≪ Previous: Finally, a mom who says what everyone's thinking about parenting: it's way too easy.

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There's a conspiracy theory that the late David Bowie predicted the coming of Kanye West. The evidence is short, concise, and ridiculously compelling. It's actually a bit spooky when you see it, coupled with the fact that David Bowie sang about space dimensions, and Kanye always claims to be a second coming and a gift to humanity.

On the cover of Bowie's 1972 album, The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders From Mars, Bowie is seen standing underneath a sigh that says "K.West." It's the name of a furrier in London that has since closed. Coincidence? Yes, but still crazy.

https://twitter.com/QuarterPress/status/687514620697952256

The first song on that album is "Five Years," which tells of an Earth doomed to destruction. It is a song predicting the end of the world, and it announces that there are five years left until the apocalypse begins. The lyric "We've got five years, that's all we've got," is a clear warning.

Five years and two days after the album came out, a young man Kanye Omari West was born in Atlanta, Georgia.

Later in the album on the track "Starman," Bowie predicts that "There's a starman waiting in the sky. He'd like to come and meet us, but he thinks he'd blow our minds." So perhaps Kanye is the savior and Starman predicted by Bowie to arrive and save the world.

The final coincidence occurred on Bowie's final album, Blackstar, which was released just days before his death. On the title track, "Blackstar," Bowie may have suggested that someone will take his place: "Something happened on the day he died. Spirit rose a meter and stepped aside. Somebody else took his place, and bravely cried 'I'm a blackstar, I'm a blackstar!'"

Kanye could be the black star that was called from the cosmos to replace Bowie, redeeming the world just in time before its destruction. Or, it was more likely just Bowie contemplating his mortality as he left the world with one last gorgeous album before he passed away. Either way, it's fun for fans to somehow find more mesmerizing enigmas in Bowie's lyrics and legacy.

Gals are going bananas over this hot guy who adopted a rescue cat.

January 15, 2016, 2:30 pm

≫ Next: The way this baby imitates her mom saying 'I love you' will make you want to get pregnant this weekend.

≪ Previous: There's a compelling conspiracy theory that David Bowie predicted Kanye.

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The Joplin Humane Society posted this photo on Facebook yesterday of an adorable little kitten named Hansel who found a forever home, but all anyone cared about was the hunkalicous beefcake holding him. 

https://www.facebook.com/JoplinHumane/photos/pb.144041035612022.-2207520000.1452889783./1301484203201027/?type=3&theater

Judging by these Facebook comments, Ryan Reynolds Jr. here can go ahead delete his Tinder profile right me-ow (sorry).

THIS LADY DOES HIS HAIR! SHE GETS TO TOUCH HIM OMG!

You have to admit that this guy's impressive. He not only rescued a kitten, but he also made a bunch of women horny while wearing like three shirts.

Related: A pug and a bunch of hot dudes danced around for charity, so you can thirst for a good cause.

The way this baby imitates her mom saying 'I love you' will make you want to get pregnant this weekend.

January 15, 2016, 3:20 pm

≫ Next: Cards Against Humanity founder sends a 55-gallon drum of personal lubricant to militiamen.

≪ Previous: Gals are going bananas over this hot guy who adopted a rescue cat.

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When this adorable 15-month-old baby says "I love you," there's a 100% chance you will say it back. That's right, this YouTube video is talk-out-loud-to-your-computer-cute. Prepare to have your heart melted: 

https://youtu.be/1ctP9cLRbnE

Cutest. Baby. Ever.

Cards Against Humanity founder sends a 55-gallon drum of personal lubricant to militiamen.

January 15, 2016, 4:30 pm

≫ Next: This weekend, party like this cat that snuck into a pet store's catnip display.

≪ Previous: The way this baby imitates her mom saying 'I love you' will make you want to get pregnant this weekend.

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Earlier this week, Jon Ritzheimer, the spokesperson for the militiamen who are holed up in an Oregon wildlife refuge, posted a video complaining about how there were several dildos and candy penises among the donations they received. While you might be tempted to tell the militiamen that beggars can't be choosers (and that beggars should also maybe pack some food if they're going to occupy a remote wildlife refuge), remember this: they received dildos, not lube. And what's sadder than a bunch of militiamen getting gifted dildos they can't use?

Well, don't worry, guys. Cards Against Humanity creator Max Temkin has it taken care of: he sent the militiamen 55 gallons of lube.

https://twitter.com/MaxTemkin/status/687445755309641728?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

If the shipping date is to be believed, the militiamen might already be celebrating their new lube acquisition. Congrats, guys. This is a great day for America.

This weekend, party like this cat that snuck into a pet store's catnip display.

January 15, 2016, 5:35 pm

≫ Next: Weekend

≪ Previous: Cards Against Humanity founder sends a 55-gallon drum of personal lubricant to militiamen.

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Actually, you should probably party a level below the stoned cat in this video, since this looks like the feline equivalent of open bar wedding drunk, which everyone knows is the drunkest of all drunks. According to the video description on YouTube, this pet store prowler got into the toys by accident, but her owner did come pick her up. Just like you picked your drunk boyfriend up off the dance floor at the last wedding you went to.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_YudzneyjzM

Weekend

January 16, 2016, 5:00 am

≫ Next: 14 accidentally perverted children's drawings.

≪ Previous: This weekend, party like this cat that snuck into a pet store's catnip display.

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14 accidentally perverted children's drawings.

January 16, 2016, 6:00 am

≫ Next: The reunion between this cute little boy and his dog is as emotional as a Pixar movie.

≪ Previous: Weekend

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Owing to a lack of awareness and knowledge, kids have no idea how hilarious they are. They don't understand how humor can work on multiple levels, up to and including how their earnest attempts at art almost inevitably includes something that looks like boobs or a dong.

1. Get alone, little doggy.

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2. You sure did.

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3. This wasn't in the Bible.

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4. How very old school.

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5. What a pretty necklace!

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6. Monkey, see?

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7. So says Mom.

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8. Cut it out.

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9. If you wanna sell lemonade, you gotta have a website.

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10. A mother's pride.

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11. Stay perky.

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12. Tis better to give than receive.

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13. Don't we all.

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14. Where's the fire?

The reunion between this cute little boy and his dog is as emotional as a Pixar movie.

January 16, 2016, 7:00 am

≫ Next: Here are 17 tweets to help you laugh through the second half of #DryJanuary.

≪ Previous: 14 accidentally perverted children's drawings.

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Kase the dog had been missing for about a month when he was finally found and reunited with the Williams family. Paula Williams surprised her young son with the dog, and the boy collapsed into the most sincere fit of tears a happy human being is capable of.

https://www.facebook.com/BradandPaulaWilliams/videos/o.157865187655507/1063349260351938/?type=2&theater

Kase, who was found down the street from the family's home, was like "whatever, I lick your face." The sobbing little boy, on the other hand, acted like he'd found the meaning of life, which in a way he had.

Here are 17 tweets to help you laugh through the second half of #DryJanuary.

January 16, 2016, 7:00 am

≫ Next: A mom casually offered to save another parent's life at their kids' hockey game.

≪ Previous: The reunion between this cute little boy and his dog is as emotional as a Pixar movie.

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Ah, January, the month when everyone's best intentions face off against winter. It's the hardest time of the year to resist drinking and eating carbs, yet someone invented #DryJanuary. Sure, take a month off drinking when the nights are long, the days are cold, and the cupboard is overflowing with leftover holiday wine. But hey, if you're really committed to it, then here are 17 funny tweets to help you laugh at your own choices.

1.

https://twitter.com/MartinDaubney/status/685175203886923776

2.

https://twitter.com/Bez/status/683422331117633537

3.

https://twitter.com/LadyGreysbar/status/687991153103388672

4.

https://twitter.com/alutkin/status/688066341077671936

5.

https://twitter.com/Slouloulou/status/551509185872265216?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

6.

https://twitter.com/Okeating/status/551732863427964928?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

7.

https://twitter.com/HireMeImFunny/status/688068435503394817

8.

https://twitter.com/jasminecomedy/status/688069614719336449

9.

https://twitter.com/sarahrainone/status/688081261726924800

10.

https://twitter.com/justinperez/status/688095076564615168

11.

https://twitter.com/TheMissyBaker/status/688073361205936128

12.

https://twitter.com/nedostup/status/688064763390246912

13.

https://twitter.com/sidleykate/status/688072619724242944

14.

https://twitter.com/missbreton/status/688081562626355201

15.

https://twitter.com/mindtheclam/status/688075014663462913

16.

https://twitter.com/AdjectiveNouns/status/688103812200935424

17.

https://twitter.com/jaime_lutz/status/688108514644905985

A mom casually offered to save another parent's life at their kids' hockey game.

January 16, 2016, 7:42 am

≫ Next: This polyamorous couple has to deal with crappy messages on OKCupid too.

≪ Previous: Here are 17 tweets to help you laugh through the second half of #DryJanuary.

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Peter Brouwer was in desperate need of a liver donor, and it just so happened another hockey parent, Vanessa Smith, was a perfect match. Smith had no idea that Brouwer, just another parent at their sons' hockey games in Ontario, Canada, was hunting for a donor and fighting for his life.

Brouwer was diagnosed with a very rare autoimmune disease called Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis (PSC). Over the years, it had progressively destroyed his liver. He took his search public for a donor on his Facebook page last fall.

Smith, who often sits next to Brouwer and his wife at hockey games, doesn't even have a Facebook account. She also doesn't have a Tinder account, which has been oddly known to result in organ transplants. She heard the news the old-fashioned way, through parents chatting at their kids' games. She knew she has type O blood, which is often a universal donor for transplants. Brouwer described his shock when she offered to be a donor:

We were at our son's hockey game in Brampton and … she came up to me and said 'I'm O-type blood. I would love to do this.' We were more of a casual acquaintance. When we would go to tournaments we would sit together. The friendship was at the rink and at the lacrosse floor.

The transplant took place on Jan. 11, with Smith undergoing surgery for the donation followed by Brouwer's eight-hour operation. Brouwer's wife, Melissa, described how humble Smith was after saving her husband's life:

Vanessa is very modest. Peter was just praising her, 'You're my hero. Thank you so much. I'm alive because of you.' But she was pretty bashful.

Everyone is looking forward to having life to return to the way it was prior to Brouwer's diagnosis: attending the same amount of hockey games, but with less fatigue. Good luck to Peter and his entire family during his recovery. 

This polyamorous couple has to deal with crappy messages on OKCupid too.

January 16, 2016, 8:10 am

≫ Next: Here are the 21 healthiest nerds running a 'Star Wars' 10K this weekend.

≪ Previous: A mom casually offered to save another parent's life at their kids' hockey game.

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Caleb and Tran are a polyamorous couple that lived monogamously for two years before deciding to open themselves up to dating other people. They remained primary partners, and in addition to telling each other all the naughty details of their dating exploits, they also run a podcast where they tell anyone who asks about it too. And, boy, do people have a lot of questions.

In this short documentary about their life produced by Elite Daily, they cover most of the main points:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pp73yjLnP2A

The popularity of their podcast ,and the general interest in their lifestyle, might point to more and more people feeling frustrated by traditional ideas about relationships. And Tran and Caleb seem really happy! They're also very communicative about issues, boundaries and petty jealousies over who orgasmed first.

The only really unpleasant thing about polyamory as depicted in this video is the fact that you already have someone to have sex with, but you still have to trawl OKCupid and open yourself up to horrible copy-pasted messages from creeps. At least, Tran does. Different sexual arrangements, same old sh*t for the ladies.

Here are the 21 healthiest nerds running a 'Star Wars' 10K this weekend.

January 16, 2016, 8:40 am

≫ Next: The bro that beat up an Uber driver is now suing the driver for $5 million.

≪ Previous: This polyamorous couple has to deal with crappy messages on OKCupid too.

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Disney is holding a series of Star Wars races at Disneyland this weekend. The races include a 5K, 10K, and half marathon. Since Disney now owns the Star Wars franchise, it gives super fans opportunities to be super nerds. And there's no better way for someone to prove they have energy for things other than sitting in a movie theater or looking at still-packaged action figures than running a physical race. Here are the 21 healthiest Star Wars nerds running through Disneyland:

1. 

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAmZO3KJM6l/?tagged=starwars10k

2. 

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAmzmUHImD_/?tagged=starwars10k

3.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAmzWp6qxYr/?tagged=starwars10k

4.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAmzUL6EIJb/?tagged=starwars10k

5.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAmy-Ncrrtz/?tagged=starwars10k

 6. 

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAmy7azo7lA/?tagged=starwars10k

7.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAmywBpEIHq/?tagged=starwars10k

8.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAmyuXEjViY/?tagged=starwars10k

9.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAmysNnPGKE/?tagged=starwars10k

10.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAmyjkFtekG/?tagged=starwars10k

11.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAmyg1GANM5/?tagged=starwars10k

12.

https://twitter.com/runDisney/status/688367802655227904

13. 

https://twitter.com/starwars/status/688372646036148224

14.

https://twitter.com/starwars/status/688376840474382336

15.

https://twitter.com/AuntieJessieB/status/688394459583651840

16.

https://twitter.com/JulieRei/status/688386583523766272

17.

https://twitter.com/runDisney/status/688362793771270144

18.

https://twitter.com/KylieEricaMar/status/688349193077850112

19.

https://twitter.com/MMMarathoner/status/688341524669534208

20.

https://twitter.com/tddewey/status/688340837818888192

21.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAmyRFgHqsf/?tagged=starwars10k

 

The bro that beat up an Uber driver is now suing the driver for $5 million.

January 16, 2016, 10:01 am

≫ Next: Expert predicts the death of the beard is imminent, and says he has the facts to prove it.

≪ Previous: Here are the 21 healthiest nerds running a 'Star Wars' 10K this weekend.

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Benjamin Golden, the former Taco Bell executive who assaulted an Uber driver and got caught by dash-cam video that went viral, is now suing the driver for $5 million. Golden was quickly vilified after the video of him punching the driver, Edward Caban, went viral.

In the original incident, Golden was extremely drunk, and repeatedly punched and slapped Caban when he asked him to get out of his car. Caban was able to use pepper spray on Golden, and he was arrested shortly thereafter by police. After the video went viral, Golden was fired from his job as a marketing executive at Taco Bell.

In his lawsuit, he claims the driver illegally recorded the incident, and will seek to have the video barred from evidence in the criminal trial against him. He also said in court documents that Caban is to blame for any injuries suffered during the Oct. 30 ride.

This is a brilliant strategy for Golden to redeem his good name and reputation. Deny responsibility and sue some poor guy that works hard for more money than he'll ever see in a lifetime. 

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Expert predicts the death of the beard is imminent, and says he has the facts to prove it.

January 16, 2016, 12:12 pm

≫ Next: A 'Simpsons' clip has surfaced featuring Alan Rickman and a David Bowie song.

≪ Previous: The bro that beat up an Uber driver is now suing the driver for $5 million.

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Alun Withey, an academic who will run a three-year research project on the beard and its cultural history in the UK, predicts that the beard might finally die in 2016. Apparently non-experts who comment on trends in facial hair have been predicting the end of the beard for the past two or three years. This time however, Withey claims the end is near.

Common creative types and celebrities alike have been sporting beards for a while. There was slight concern when a report suggested they might be full of fecal matter, but some actual tests with celebs like Will Forte proved the fear inaccurate. 

Withey says that based on historical data and patterns of beard popularity, the trend will soon be over. While he predicts that beards will diminish in popularity, he fully acknowledges that they will remain a part of cultural history:

The hipster beard, or lumberjack beard, is going to be the defining facial hair of this generation.

Withey is truly fighting the good fight. Without his groundbreaking research, the general public would have to just wait and see when beards go away without the benefit of predictive modeling. Perhaps his future projects could predict when people will once again stop wearing black leather jackets.

A 'Simpsons' clip has surfaced featuring Alan Rickman and a David Bowie song.

January 16, 2016, 1:53 pm

≫ Next: Farewell

≪ Previous: Expert predicts the death of the beard is imminent, and says he has the facts to prove it.

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A clip from a 2013 episode of The Simpsons featured Alan Rickman (voiced by Benedict Cumberbatch) with a song written by David Bowie playing in the background. It's quite a coincidence since both Bowie and Rickman passed away this past week from cancer at the age of 69. The clip is a spoof of the movie Love Actually, in which Rickman played a husband contemplating infidelity, and features the song "All The Young Dudes" written by Bowie:

https://youtu.be/ZPrYtb6diu8

The Simpsons has produced a number of clips with weird coincidences about the future. One episode predicted the presidency of Donald Trump, while another predicted a new Star Wars film and an Alvin and the Chipmunks film opening the same weekend. Let this be a good excuse for binge-watching hours of old episodes.

Farewell

January 17, 2016, 5:00 am

≫ Next: Kylo Ren went on 'Undercover Boss' to see how The First Order really feels about him on 'SNL.'

≪ Previous: A 'Simpsons' clip has surfaced featuring Alan Rickman and a David Bowie song.

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Kylo Ren went on 'Undercover Boss' to see how The First Order really feels about him on 'SNL.'

January 17, 2016, 6:40 am

≫ Next: A blurry, leaked teaser for the next 'Star Wars' film, 'Rogue One,' has resurfaced.

≪ Previous: Farewell

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Adam Driver hosted SNL on Saturday night, and brought his Force Awakenscharacter Kylo Ren with him. To tide us over until Rogue One comes out on 12/16/16 or until Episode VIII comes out on 5/26/17 (but who's counting?), SNL gave fans the ultimate Star Wars fix by sending Kylo Ren on Undercover Boss to find out how the stormtroopers and technicians on Starkiller Base really feel. "You get so caught up at returning the galaxy to its rightful state," he said, "That you miss what's going on behind the scenes." Watch as he uses the force to solve a cafeteria dispute and and tries his best not to blow his cover:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FaOSCASqLsE

Related: 'Dad Joke Han Solo' is the 'Star Wars' parody account that will make you laugh in 12 pun-secs.

A blurry, leaked teaser for the next 'Star Wars' film, 'Rogue One,' has resurfaced.

January 17, 2016, 7:14 am

≫ Next: Adam Driver brought his Kylo Ren intensity to the role of 'Porn Doctor' on 'SNL.'

≪ Previous: Kylo Ren went on 'Undercover Boss' to see how The First Order really feels about him on 'SNL.'

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This teaser for Star Wars: Rogue One was originally shown to an audience at the Star Wars Celebration convention back in April 2015, but leaked copies never stayed online long until now. With The Force Awakens breaking all the records and Adam Driver (Kylo Ren) hosting Saturday Night Live last night, it's a good time crank up the hype machine for Star Wars: Rogue One, coming out in a mere 11 months. The film takes place immediately before the 1977 Star Wars, and is about how Rebel spies stole the plans for the first Death Star—the same plans that Princess Leia hides on R2-D2 at the beginning of A New Hope.​

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sd5zVuuHBQA

Although a bit blurry, you can see a TIE fighter flying overhead on a jungle moon—and as we all know, TIE fighters are never found far from their base—where the in-construction Death Star is in very close orbit, dominating the sky. Then, audio of Rebel soldiers giving a panicked "fall back" order plays.

https://twitter.com/RogueOne2016/status/632632976816373760

It's been almost a year since this camera footage of what is essentially concept art (filming for Rogue One hadn't even begun in April) was first leaked, so at this point it's not spoiling anything that isn't public knowledge.

https://twitter.com/theswu/status/684067839620313088

The narration is an audio clip of Obi-Wan Kenobi from the original Star Wars, "For over a thousand generations the Jedi Knights were the guardians of peace and justice in the Old Republic. Before the dark times. Before the Empire." Hopefully, the fact that these clips are no longer being deleted means an official teaser is almost here—the first full-length trailer is due to appear before Captain America: Civil War in May.