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Chrissy Teigen has introduced her baby to Snapchat by licking her on the head.

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Chrissy Teigen and John Legend's baby, Luna, is hitting all of the proper social media developmental markers: first Instagram within three days of birth, and now, first Snapchat within one week of birth. And not only did Luna appear on Teigen's Snapchat, she went above and beyond by appearing in multiple Snapchats. Like this one, which was captured by a Chrissy Teigen fan account, where Teigen licks Luna on the head (with a digital dog tongue):

And this "no filter" one that Teigen reposted to Instagram herself:

#nofilter 😁

A photo posted by chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) on

Here's one last one from the fan account, which includes both the image above and a gorgeous makeup selfie from Teigen. Can't believe she took the time to do all that jewel work so soon after giving birth!

Really looking forward to Luna's first posts on Periscope, Twitter, Google+, Tumblr, Pinterest, Vine, and LinkedIn. 


These moms got drunk and tried to make crafts from Pinterest. And oh, how they failed.

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Drinking is an activity that is best paired with conversation, watching sports, or basically anything that doesn't require you to flex your fine motor skills. So, obviously, getting drunk + crafts = a ridiculous train wreck. Despite the fact that the concept of this video feels like BuzzFeed put a bunch of "popular woman words" in a hat and pulled them out at random, it's really quite delightful to watch wine-drunk moms fumble through those craft tutorials that seemingly perfect ladies post to Pinterest. Enjoy their struggles, and be glad you're spending your time watching a video instead of trying to make a "Bits and Bobs Box."

Watch Postmodern Jukebox back an insanely talented 14-year-old singing 'Time After Time.'

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The group Postmodern Jukebox is known for its old-timey covers of pop songs like Radiohead's "Creep" or Britney's "Oops, I Did It Again." Recently, the group ran a contest to find new talent. One of the people it found was a 14-year-old from Chicago named Caroline Baran who has pipes so good, a plumber would be impressed. Postmodern Jukebox flew Baran out to Los Angeles to perform a cover of Cindy Lauper's "Time After Time." It's really good:

The group also noted on YouTube that Baran did this crazy cover in one take—basically, the opposite of time after time. 

Seasonal

People share their stories of the strangest things pregnant women have ever craved.

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Thanks to the rapid body changes and the hormone fluctuations that come with growing a tiny human, pregnancy is a very bizarre adventure. This famously manifests in pregnancy cravings. But as these folks on Reddit can attest, not all pregnant women crave pickles and chocolate.

1. Bananas are a common pregnancy craving, but thebodyguard's cravings went a little past the mark.

I wanted to drink the juice out of the hot banana pepper jar. (I did a few times but I got horrible heart burn)

2. When theycallmespazzi was pregnant, she had some real outside-the-box thinking when it came to pickles.

I was once eating a pickle and thought it would go great with some marshmallow fluff.....it did.

3. Tearing_you_asunder's wife experienced pica, a mineral deficiency that makes a person crave dirt, clay, and other things that aren't food.

Wife ate graphite (pencil lead) with first pregnancy, rocks with the second. Pica is not uncommon in pregnancy. She really craved these things.

4. Mystified_one also got a bit of pica, confined mostly to the cupboard under the kitchen sink (she didn't give in to this craving, which you can tell because she's alive to write this).

My food cravings were on par with normal.

It was the non-food cravings that drove me bonkers! I knew better than to taste any of them although it was tempting just to stop wanting it so much. Here is a list:

Clorox clean up had just hit the store shelves - Smelled so good I just wanted to drink it

Liquid paper - no idea why

Lemon Scented Powdered Dishwasher Detergent - Did not own a dishwasher or have any, but I craved this one so badly for months. I tried lemon everything hoping to kill the craving but nothing helped!

Triple Antibiotic ointment but only with the band-aid smell

Fire log starters - made out of wood shavings it was something about the glue they used.

The funniest part - My son was born at 4:09.

Why did I never talk to my doctor about this? Because I was 17 and scared to death that he would think I was insane.

5. A colleague of fluffitude had a preference for two things together that most people find gross individually.

A co-worker who sat right next to me craved (and ate) buttermilk and sardines. I had to leave the room.

6. The mother-in-law of sarawwr7 never said a naughty word again.

My mother in law said that she would crave soap [when she was pregnant with] with my husband. Like little chips of soap.

7. thetixarenowdiamonds had a craving that could only be satiated with time travel to 1993.

With my second, the only craving I had was for Crystal Pepsi. Crystal fucking Pepsi. Needless to say, it never got sated.

8. DoctorAssGiggles had a craving even grosser than her user name.

I would crave FISH HEADS

9. NoahJWatkins was either really pregnant or really stoned.

My girlfriend ate a slice of pizza on top of a waffle and smothered it in apple sauce. Also, peanut butter and butter sandwiches.

10. What's black and white and read all over? The pregnancy cravings of Mourntilldawn's mother.

My mum used to eat newspaper and ice cubes when she was pregnant with my sister.

11. When the sister of Affordable_Z_Jobs she ate like a college student.

My sister ate peanut butter with Spaghetti-O's for a week straight.

12. User effieokay had three great tastes that tastes…something…together.

Venison, fish, and Hot Cheetos. Together.

13. diMario's girlfriend's pregnancy was all about condiment swapping (although the pickles + fluffy cream products is a recurring theme).

My then girlfriend had a craving for pickles and whipped cream. Also, she would regularly snack on strawberries with mayonnaise.

14. Sorry, vrosej10, but these are the vegan options at most big restaurants.

Peanut butter and raw cabbage sandwiches when pregnant and worse than that, pumpkin soup.

15. rogerg1990 just wanted slime. Pure slime.

Peaches and Oysters, in the same bowl.

Robert E. Lee Elementary is changing its name. Unwisely, they let the Internet propose new ones.

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In Texas, the Austin Independent School District has decided to rename Robert E. Lee Elementary, and while that decision was itself controversial, that's not what this story is about. This is about the fact that, for reasons unbeknownst to all, they asked the public to chime in online with suggestions. The result was...predictable. Here's a very partial list of what the community is suggesting (even more names below).

Now, Bruce Lee was a pretty cool guy and John Cena actually holds the Make A Wish Foundation's record for visiting the most sick kids (Drew Brees is fine, whatever). Schoolie McSchoolface is obviously a nod to Boaty McBoatface, but clearly the cherry on this bad-idea sundae is the Adolf Hitler School For Friendship And Tolerance. Good job, Internet.

Here are the top 10 entries right now, plus some more gems according to KXVN:

  1. Donald J. Trump Elementary: 45 nominations
  2. Robert E. Lee Elementary: 34 nominations
  3. Russell Lee Elementary: 32 nominations
  4. Harper Lee Elementary: 30 nominations
  5. Elisabet Ney Elementary: 15 nominations
  6. Lee Elementary: 13 nominations
  7. Adolf Hitler School for Friendship and Tolerance: 8 nominations
  8. Waller Creek Elementary: 8 nominations
  9. Dr. Frances J. Nesmith Elementary School: 7 nominations
  10. Guy Bizzell Elementary: 6 nominations

Some of the more notable, but less voted names include:

Adam Lanza’s School of Fun, Bee Movie, Bleeding Heart Liberal Elementary, Boaty McBoatface Elementary School, Forgetting the Past Dooms You to Repeat It Elementary, Garfunkel, Hypothetical Perfect Person Memorial Elementary School

So, if you ever wonder why Southern states are taking so long to get rid of the Confederate flag, maybe it's because they're afraid the citizens will vote to replace it with a crude drawing of genitalia. Because, let's face it, that's what we'd do. 

Prince once covered Radiohead's 'Creep' at a concert, then kept it offline for years. It's back.

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Updated 4/24/16: In the wake of Prince's passing, you should really check out this awesome, shiver-inducing performance. Yeah, Prince was weird for trying to keep this offline, but he could be weird like that. He also refused to let Weird Al cover his music (which, technically, Weird Al needs no permission for), but nobody's perfect. This is still an awesome video.

12/8/16: Way back in 2008, Prince covered Radiohead's sexual weirdo hit "Creep" at Coachella, then click-blocked YouTube and anyone else trying to host it by claiming copyright infringement. This is a lot of baloney, because it's not his song! There are quotes from Radiohead frontman Thom Yorke from as far back as when it began in 2008, saying essentially, "WTF?"

Really? He's blocked it? Surely we should block it. Hang on a moment. Well, tell him to unblock it. It's our... song.

This has gone back and forth for years, but in October it was posted on YouTube again, and today Prince was like, "eh, wtf?" and tweeted it out to the masses (since deleted). Hey, he's a creep, he's a weirdo, and he does not own this intellectual property. So, enjoy!

At 90, David Attenborough will finally be the subject of his own BBC documentary.

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From May 7 to May 16, the BBC will be celebrating the storied life and career of one of the planet's most fascinating and wide-ranging animals: nature documentarian and narrator par excellence, Sir David Attenborough. Fearsomely intelligent, yet possessed of vocal chords that could soothe even the most ferocious of beasts, this specimen is what humanity most associates with nature films. His distinctive call can be heard on these films for as long as they've been a genre. From the Sahara to the Arctic to the Amazon, this noble biped is a worthy subject of the BBC treatment.

See way more of Attenborough's amazing decades-spanning career here.


Teachers share the weirdest-named kids who ever passed through their classrooms.

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Sometimes, you meet a person or a child with an unusual name and instantly wonder what they did to piss off their parents before they were even born. Such is the case with these odd names submitted anonymously by schoolteachers on Reddit, where they were more than happy to finally have a place to make fun of the oddly-named kids they have to educate every day. After all, it's not Peachtreana's fault that she was born with a destiny to be the state of Georgia's mascot.

1. That joke about Peachtreana wasn't a joke, as macrocosm93 reveals.

Peachtreanna.

In Georgia.

2. Do you want to raise a kid who grows up to build a death ray? Because if you give a kid the name GodofWitsandWine's student had, you're gonna get a kid who grows up to build a death ray.

Pennis. Pronounced like Dennis but with a P. Why would anyone do this to their child?

3. You can name your child after the Chosen One (be it Jesus, Anakin, or other), but as the child in Lord_of__the_Fries' wife's class shows, that doesn't mean they'll live up to their name.

My wife is a teacher and had to stop Neo from peeling glue off his hand. He aint the one.

4. What with pop culture and celebrities, we Americans somehow forget just how many ways there are to screw up naming your kid in this big wide world. Fortunately, LucasK336's grandmother preserved this Spanish/Argentinean tradition of messing it up.

My grandmother was a teacher in the "deep countryside" in Argentina back in the 50s. There is a hmm... tradition inherited from Spain I think, where you name your child with the name of the saint of the day he was born. Each day is the day of a saint, and they would sell these calendars with the name of a saint each day. So if your baby was born on the day of St. Rodrigo, you call him Rodrigo, for example.

The problem was that some of these calendars also had the national argentinian holydays marked. So July 9, May 25, etc, were marked as "Fiesta Cívica" (something like "Civic Celebration") instead of with the name of the saints. Basically she told me that she had children who were born one of these days, called literally "Civic Celebration".

5. STUMPOFWAR is not making this up. After all, how could they?

Poultry....no I'm not making that up.

6. Not a teacher, but susistu9 still has to come in contact with a daily stream of the American public.

Not a teacher, but I work at my county's welfare office. There's a family and these are all the kids' first names from oldest to youngest:

  • Princess
  • Prince
  • Crowned Prince
  • Prince Mowgli
  • Princess Modica-Nordica

I wish I was kidding.

7. In case you were worried all these kids turn out weird, TheMadTherapist assures us that one adventuresome lad is doing just fine.

Interning in the counseling department at a high school. It's early Monday morning and I'm chugging coffee to perk up. They finish up mornings announcements and read off a list of students needing to go to the office for various reasons. The last name read was "Indiana Jones".

I immediately check the school student roster and there he is, Jones, Indiana. The kid was actually fairly well adjusted and well liked.

8. We're pretty sure these names submitted by Newtonswig come from a British university, a place where "Benedict Cumberbatch" isn't even blinked at.

I'm a teacher, but I didn't come across these names teaching. I was working as a steward in my students union (basically, you know at night clubs, when you're dancing on a chair and some scrawny guy in a polo shirt comes up to you and says in the deepest voice he can muster, "Can you get down from there mate?"- me right there) while at uni.

Anyway, I'm playing with the student search on the tills out the front, and I work out how to use the wildcard function. Like if you search "s?ith" all the people named smith come up. I did what any self respecting infantile MF would do and did all the swear words.

There was a Ding Dong. A Mrs Poo. I'll let it sink in that she married into that name.

Miss Fukunda Mbabwe.

And my two favourites, whom I will never forget:

Miss Bumtita Thongsari.

And, I don't know if you'll read this the way I did: Mr Wancalerm Siruphand.

9. Not technically a school, but overthelinemarkit0 did help one kid overcome his name to become cool despite it.

Worked at a Juvenile Treatment facility, had a kid sent to us middle name was "Ice Cold". Turned out to be a really good kid just terrible drug/gang infested fuck heads for parents.

10. This name from Back2Bach's classroom begs a simple question: "Why?"

Had a girl in class whose name was "Peonme."

The boys had many variations of her name.

(Staff members thought her parents meant to name her "Peony," after the flower, but got it wrong.)

11. DIGGYRULES has an important reminder: you can try to give your kids extra-dignified names, but it will still probably sound stupid.

I had a boy named "Mister" and there is a kid named "Sir" at my school. Those are pretty unusual.

12. Also not a school, but a place of work where you need to verify people's names, tekhnomancer has come across some winners.

I work at a call center, here are some winners of children I have seen (all teenagers or younger):

  • De'creshondria

  • Maxx Gay

  • Marijuana

  • Porn

  • Dingle,

  • Wanna (middle name Smoke, dead serious)

  • Dej-'unique

13. Naming conventions, unlike everything else, are a lot more free in China, as someguysaid reveals. 

I'm a TEFL teacher in China. The kids here have some fascinating names. Some are obviously just mistakes (Like Biran or Windy). Some are quite clever.

One girl about 15 said she wanted to be called KFC. When I asked her why she smiled and said "Because everybody likes KFC!"

Another very shy girl about 19 called herself shadow...which I thought was a lovely name.

Then there were the parents who had an extra child by accident and called her...extra. Seriously. There are also parents who name their child after an inanimate object like "telephone" or "train". "Tiger" is a popular name for boys too.

There's also a boy named monkey; "apple" is quite common, and many others like this. For some reason there's a fair few older girls 20+ named Queenie; these days the name seems to have fallen out of fashion. These are the names the parents or kids themselves have chosen, we teachers aren't trying to make fun of them.

Edit: Forgot to mention I work with a Chinese girl whose name is Tim.

14. None of these by themselves are that weird, unless you consider that one day, all these names pistachiopaul hates will unite against us.

I've always hated the Hayden/Haiden/Jayden/Jaiden/Jaylin/Jaelin/Braeden/Brayden names, but I lost my mind at Drayden.

15. And going out on a really dumb but kind of beautiful note, is a one-of-a-kind name encountered by bdubz while assisting a pediatrician.

Not a teacher but during med school, rotated with a pediatrician in Berkeley, Ca and came across a kid named Starshyt. When asked why that name parents said "you ever see a shooting star and behind it kinda looks like shit...?"

Article 33

Workplace

John Oliver recruits Hamilton's Lin-Manuel Miranda to rap for Puerto Rican relief.

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America's foremost public intellectual, John Oliver, just utilized Lin-Manuel Miranda, writer and star of the Broadway musical Hamilton, to help explain Puerto Rico's debt crisis. A story of corporate greed, Congressional mishandling, and a peoples' survival at risk through no fault of their own, it is an important sequel to Hamilton. The singing doesn't start until 19:24, but the long lead-up is worth it. Plus, Miranda squeezes in both Friends and Titanic jokes. ​

Miranda's the perfect man for this job, having already asserted influence over the Treasury Department—the popularity of his Broadway show essentially kept Alexander Hamilton "the ten dollar Founding Father." 

Miranda is proud of Puerto Rico, and there's no doubt Puerto Ricans are proud of him. Even if they can't get tickets to his show.

Kim Kardashian shows off her $1 million 'push present' with uncomfortably sexual photoshoot.

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Kim Kardashian has finally received the push present she's lusted for ever since giving birth to tiny human Saint West in December. Say what you will about Kim K, but any woman deserves what she wants after a baby comes out of her vagina.

You're the sun in my morning babe

A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

In this case, according to Cosmopolitan, Kim's push present totaled up to about $1 million, because it's a Lorraine Schwartz diamond choker. How did Kanye know she wanted this choker (which Taylor Swift says is so in right now)? She posted a push present wish list on her site last year. If the necklace looks familiar, it's because Kim wore one like it to LACMA's Art+Film Gala in November and was like, "Need."

Kim's necklace is slightly less grandiose, making it perfect for day wear. 

Kanye, to his credit, delivered the beauty of a gift (guess he's not that much in debt after all). And Kim K, good reality star that she is, posted a crap ton of pretty risqué photos of herself in the necklace.

This first photo you can show your mom.

My cutie

A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

The rest of the photos Kim shared of her new necklace could be from an orgy, but were in fact taken at the wedding of Kim and Kanye's friend, Dave Grutman. 

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A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

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A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

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A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

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A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

Lovely. These photos make every other picture of Kim seem rather tame. Even this one:

When you're like I have nothing to wear LOL

A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

From henceforth, all other Kim K pics will look extremely PG.

Cocktails with Khloe vibes today! 🍸🍾🍺🍹Hair @justinemarjan Make Up @makeupbyariel

A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

Especially given the other photos Kim took of people aside from herself at the wedding:

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A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

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A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

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A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

Do you get the orgy vibe now?

Confused Beyonce fans are going after Rachael Ray instead of Rachel Roy.

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On Saturday, Beyoncé​ released her new "visual album," Lemonade, and people couldn't help but notice that many of the lyrics are about getting cheating on. The song "Sorry," in particular, has the lines: "Looking at my watch, he shoulda been home / Today I regret the night I put that ring on / He always got them fucking excuses." And at the end, a line where Queen Bey sings, "He better call Becky with the good hair." Not too subtle.

On Sunday, designer Rachel Roy posted a photo on her Instagram account (which she's since made private), with the caption, "Good hair don't care, but we will take good lighting, for selfies, or self truths, always. live in the light #nodramaqueens."

Rachel, how did you think posting this was a good idea?

So it definitely seemed to some like Rachel Roy was outing herself as "Becky," which maybe wasn't too surprising, since she was rumored to have had an affair with Jay Z (remember when Beyoncé's sister Solange was seen yelling at both Roy and Jay Z at the Met Gala on May 5?).

Naturally, Beyoncé's fans assembled and went after the woman responsible for causing trouble with the world's favorite power couple. The problem is that they accidentally began leaving furious comments (and the lemon emoji) on Instagram pictures posted by the famous TV chef Rachael Ray instead.

WRONG PERSON. Jay Z would not cheat on Bey with a burger (probably).

People expressed their confusion on Twitter.

The mix-up was bound to happen, and completely hilarious.

To clear up any confusion, this is Rachael Ray (the human, not the dog):

What a great time at #yappiehour2016. I loved meeting all my new friends 🐶. #SOBEWFF

A photo posted by Rachael Ray (@rachaelray) on

Meanwhile, Rachel Roy, who also received her fair share of hateful messages, tweeted:

That's totally true. But another thing that shouldn't be tolerated is outing yourself as "Becky" when you could have just kept quiet. You knew who you were messing with. Don't troll the Beyhive if you don't want to get stung.

This obnoxious kid trolling runners is the real winner of the London Marathon.

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Don't ever say that British people are stuffy. Around forty-thousand people turned out to participate in the 26.2-mile-long London Marathon this past weekend, and thousands more showed up to support the racers by cheering and supporting them from the sidelines. This kid was not one of them.

That is cold, kid. 

The video, taken by Twitter user @SamGSwann, was captioned "This little shit is a legend. #LondonMarathon." Legends are not born, they are made, and someone raised this kid to be a little asshole. A funny little asshole, but a little asshole nonetheless. 

When questionable UK news source The Daily Mail reached out to @SamGSwann asking permission to use his video, he burned them almost as bad as that kid burned the racers.

Two ice packs, please.  


Thank god a fan broke the rules to get this perfect photo of Prince at the end of his last show.

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On Sunday, photographer and Reddit user Evan Carter (@evvster) posted a picture from the end of the Prince show at the Fox Theatre in Atlanta on April 14—the last show Prince played before he died.

There was apparently a no cameras or phones policy at the concert, which Carter followed until the very end of the show, when he couldn't resist getting just one quick photo. On Reddit, he said:

I felt like I was stealing it at the time, but at this point I just feel lucky and honored to have been there and to have taken a picture that makes one of my heroes look exactly as I always wanted him to. Never would have imagined it would be one of the last.

No one did. 

Hero woman shames subway pervert into eating his creepy upskirt pics. Yes, eating.

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Last week in China, a woman was riding the subway when a guy started taking upskirt photos of her. So the woman, now an Internet hero, turned her camera on him and successfully shamed the creep. People's Daily shared the woman's video, which shows the guy chomping on his memory card because embarrassment makes him hungry he wanted to delete proof that he's a pervert. 

Assuming that he really swallowed the pieces and didn't just clutch them in his fist, dude is going to have some painful bowel movements—the ultimate revenge. He runs off at the end of the video, but the police caught up with him later.

Since you likely don't understand what's happening, here's a woman letting a guy know he's a pervert in English.

"Oh yeah, oh fucking yeah." Good line.

Japanese stockings with pre-painted nail polish are weirder, but definitely cheaper than a pedicure.

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Leave it to the Japanese to create a new woman’s product that is both extremely bizarre and kind of helpful at the same time. Painting your toes is usually fairly time consuming, but a company called Belle Maison created these pre-painted toenail stockings​that will give you (beautiful?) painted toes in the time it takes to put them on your feet. It's clearly for people who are too lazy to go get a pedicure. 

What if your toenails are bigger than the painted parts? D'oh!

The stockings basically have the same purpose as those gaudy, fake tattoo sleeves: some manmade artificial skin with decorated parts that will fool only the fools. Still, if you don't have the time to give yourself a pedicure, why not try these on for size?  

So weird.

They cost about $11, which is cheaper than your standard pedicure (which will usually run you $15 to $25.) Yes, cheaper is the definitely the key word. Not only do these things look super kitschy, but the material looks like it might fall apart after a few days. 

Also, the painted toes on these stockings are presumably the same size for all stockings. Which sucks because not everyone has the same size toenails as the stockings. They aren't exactly tailor fit to cover each one of your nails. 

But the product has its charm. From tiny hearts and shells to stripes and polka dots, here are some examples of the stockings, complete with fake painted toenails:

The pinky toe is on point in this one.
The index toe is a little off here.
You can't even see the stocking material in this pic. Bravo! 

If you do happen to purchase them, you may want to keep some nail polish in your purse. Just in case.

Article 13

Girlfriend pranks boyfriend with a wax strip on his eyebrow. It's a very good wax strip.

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Reuben and Bekah of ReuBekah Vidz have a special relationship involving constant pranks, which makes it a wonder they're still together. For her latest prank against her boyfriend, Bekah decided to make her joke last more than a few minutes—by ripping off half her boyfriend's eyebrow. Seriously, how has this relationship lasted?

Straight-up tossing a wax strip over someone's eyes doesn't seem like the best idea. Nonetheless, this is a solid prank so long as you don't mind living with a person who's angry with you for having ripped off half their eyebrow. Side note: those Veet wax strips tore off a surprising amount of hair. Seems like a decent brand.

Reuben may have deserved the eyebrow mishap for all he's done.

The real prank was the clean-up. 

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