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These insane cheating stories will make you happy you're single.

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If you're single and looking for a relationship, you might want to rethink your decision to start dating again. If these stories from Redditors who found their significant others cheating on them are any indication, everyone is a monster and we single people better off staying in every weekend to watch Netflix with our cats. Here are eight insane cheating stories that will make you happy you're single.

1. At least oneeyeddashaund definitely won this breakup.

I posted this in a different thread a while ago:

about 14 years ago, I caught a girl I was dating for about 6 months blowing some guy in a bedroom at a party we went to. I walked in, saw her and said "well, we're pretty much done." turned and walked out.

I was walking out of the house and she chased me down. She started yelling at me that it was my fault I caught her and I shouldn't be mad because she was trying to hide it.

My wife and I had her as a waitress last year and she's still mad at me. She walked to our table, saw it was me and walked off. About 2 minutes later a different person was our server.

EDIT: to answer a few questions below, I assumed she was still mad because when she looked at me she just glared and walked away. It was one of the worst looks I've ever received from any person in my life.

The replacement server did a fantastic job, didn't ask anything about the girl and I did tip pretty well. And the food was fine. It was a pretty nice place and I wasn't worried about her ruining her job there over it. I had been told the servers there can make over $500 a night on tips

2. My heart goes out to TeaCupLady. This is truly awful.

Woke up to him banging my friend next to me in the same bed.

Got up, put my clothes on and drove home, broke all the plates in my kitchen.

Sorry there isn't more justice

Edit; Thanks for all the commiseration guys, here is the elaboration (also in the comments)

i had a staff party all day, text him afterwards asking if i could come over and stay as we had broken my bed the previous night, all was well, some of our friends were already there so we played drinking games, however the drinking and the partying all day got to me so i bailed to go to bed, a little while later i woke up because i felt movement and saw them, i got out of bed, shaking and started to put on my clothes.

he had the gall to ask me where i was going!

I just replied 'i have to leave'

my 'friend' got out of bed and tried to hug me, i put my hand on her face and pushed her back onto the bed and left.

he followed me out the front and told me i was being ridiculous but i just ignored him, jumped in my car and left, i was a bottle of tequila down and really shouldnt have been driving, but i really didnt know what else to do, i mean, what can you do?

3. pornpundit probably dodged a bullet if this is how his ex treats her cousin.

I saw my (then) girlfriend on the street with some guy. They were physically comfortable, holding hands, butt touching, etc. After a while I decided to confront her. She tells me he's only her cousin. Turns out he was actually her cousin

4. dageekywon made the crucial mistake of not closing his credit cards.

Married to my wife 6 months.

I work a lot (own a small business) so I'm gone a lot.

But I came home from the office part of my day to grab something I needed for a job I was headed to, heard noise in the bedroom, walked in and there she was, riding another guy.

They both looked at me, I looked at them, I grabbed what I needed and left quickly, telling her as I turned around that she better be gone when I got back.

I called a friend of mine who waited about 2 hours and then went to my place. She had left, taking essentials with her. The following weekend he stood in for me while she removed the rest of her stuff.

One mistake I made is that I didn't cancel the credit cards of mine that she had cards of also. She went out that evening with that guy and ran them all up (about 5k or so, they were not major limit cards, I had only had them to help my credit score earlier and because I was making good money now, had been on a cash-only basis for a long while, which is probably why I forgot).

That was basically the end of the finding out.

Hiring an attorney for the divorce, who then hired a PI when she replied to my filing with a request for 2k in Alimony a month revealed that she had been cheating through the entire marriage and prior. 2 guys she had been with but dumped agreed to sign affidavits with the attorney, the PI took a crapload of pictures as well. She didn't get the 2k a month once the judge saw all this at the final hearing to finalize the divorce.

After we had parted ways but were not divorced yet (this was 6+ years ago-took 6 months and a day in CA then from start to finish, its now something like 6 weeks) she went to a club and gangbanged about 10 guys in a back room.

After the divorce was final I haven't seen her again. But I know she is in AZ because shes tried to get credit in my name there 3 times.

5. The excuse reddithatesmee's boyfriend gave is definitely worse than what he was actually doing.

He told me they weren't kissing, she was just "licking coke off his face" (as a non drug user this excuse was not any more reassuring). Also, this was on my birthday. They were definitely making out, by the way.

6. MissMap's boyfriend got real creative with the reasons he "had" to keep sleeping with another girl.

Was dating a guy for almost a year and just found out i was pregnant. We had planned to have lunch together at his house but morning sickness had kicked in so I told him I would have to wait till dinner time. He sounded super disappointed so an hour later I felt well enough to surprise him with a sub for lunch. When I got to his house I found the door wide open so I walked in. As I opened his bedroom door I found him in bed with two girls. Pissed off I tossed the sub at him, called him some choice words and ran out the door. He follows me and tries to get me to calm down. I tell him I'm done and want to leave but he begs me to hear him out claiming he has a good reason for what he was doing. He then tells me the biggest crock of poo I have ever heard in my life. He tells me that he dated this girl before me for a short time. Being a middle eastern girl she was very set on the no sex rule before marriage for fear of what her family would do to her. However, one night they ended up sleeping together anyway and he broke her cherry. Pan forward to the present, she calls him in a panic saying her life was in danger. She tells him she was going on a trip over seas soon to see family and for fear of being stoned to death she begged him to meet her parents and claim they had married secretly to save her. His next words were the craziest part of my story. "...so if i dont keep sleeping with her, they will stone her to death. The other girl was just her sister making sure it was legit. Do you get it now? I am saving this womans life!" I just turned around and walked away. Almost 8 years later and I still cant tell this story without giving him some props for creativity. Kills me to do so but even I could not have told that line of crap as straight faced as he did.

7. Kaezma's boyfriend apparently didn't even find the girl he was cheating with attractive, so why even cheat?

When I was 18, I decided to skip class one morning and surprise my on/off again boyfriend. We had been together for about 3 years but the months prior to this were extremely rocky.

I stopped at a few pay phones to try to call ahead but no one picked up. Ok, I thought, no problem, I'll just go and wake him up. As I crept up the stairs with two Honey Dew iced coffees, one in each hand, I heard a female laugh. Hmmm... His little sister must have stayed home from school. I turned the corner and entered his room to find him laying in bed with some half naked girl. I froze up and all I could say was HI. He said HI back and we stared at each other for a minute before I ran out of the house.

He chased me outside while proclaiming the infamous "It's not what it looks like" line. As I was about to get into my car I screamed BUT SHE'S FUCKING UGLY! at the top of my lungs.

His response? He screamed I KNOW!! as loud as he could.

That poor girl. I wish I had thrown the ice coffees at them instead.

8. MadMan04 should get an award for his reaction to finding his girlfriend in bed with another guy.

Came home early from visiting a buddy so I could surprise my gf, I was the one that got the surprise

Found her and a dude asleep in my bed...calmly walked up to the side of the bed, gently woke her up and asked if she wanted pancakes. She must not have realized what was going on, said "Hey baby, sure".

I said "What about him? Does he like pancakes?"

The look on her face was worth every second of the shit storm that kicked up after that.


5 100% real scientific studies by actual scientists.

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Science is important: it explains our behaviors, answers our questions and even saves lives! But then sometimes we read scientific studies that make us wonder: science, are you high right now?? Here are some studies we found this week that made us wonder what science was smoking.

1. Science says getting laid will make you better at sports.

Just what society needs: a study telling jocks to do sex more. A new study conducted by sex toy company Adam & Eve found that male and female athletes who had sex on the reg showed improved athletic performance, in terms of strength, agility and endurance. High five, bro!

And it's not just about confidence. Researchers found that the chemicals released during orgasm actually mimic the physical feelings and side effects of certain illegal performance-enhancing drugs. So basically, doing it is almost like legal doping. This is an important and relevant study for everyone who was cool in high school.


2. Science says you're probably getting road rage.

According to a study recently released by the AAA Foundation for Traffic Safety, nearly 80 percent of drivers had experienced some form of road rage behind the wheel in the past year. And about 8 million drivers had experienced "extreme road rage," which could mean intentionally ramming another car or being physically violent.

According to researchers, the solution is to practice "emotional intelligence." When you start feeling enraged, pause, think things through, and try to empathize with other drivers. This could help you manage your rage and prevent accidents.

This is an important study for those of us who thought the solution to road rage was turning up the death metal.


3. Science determines how long you can make eye contact without freaking someone out.

Eye contact is a tricky beast. Avert your eyes too early and you might seem shifty. But stare too long and you might seem too intense or even creepy. To put an end to this form of social torture, researchers asked a group of 498 volunteers to gaze into the eyes of an actor in a video, and to press a button if their eyes met for an uncomfortably short or long amount of time. They found that the participants had an average “preferred gaze duration” of 3.3 seconds. So start timing your eye contact, and have fun at your next party!


4. Study of whether trees sleep at night

Ever wonder if trees sleep? No? Well, these scientists did. Researchers from Austria, Finland and Hungary used laser scanners to study the day-night rhythm of trees. As it turns out, trees do go to sleep, kind of. “Our results show that the whole tree droops during night which can be seen as position change in leaves and branches," said Eetu Puttonen from the Finnish Geospatial Research Institute.

Stay away from trees in the morning, before they've had their coffee.


5. Will mercury in retrograde really mess up your life?

Mercury in retrograde is a time when the solar system's smallest planet appears to move through the sky in reverse. And according to your new age-y friend, it's the reason your life is a mess and that guy never texted you back. Mercury in retrograde will occur four times in 2016, totaling about 80 days, which could explain all the chaos in your life right now. But—shocker!—science doesn't exactly back this up. "The idea that the gravity from these very distant bodies affects our lives in some way just doesn't work in the framework of physics," said Jean-Luc Margot, a planetary astronomer and professor at UCLA.

He's probably wrong though. Because if it's not the planets, what else could possibly explain that guy not texting you back?

Chad from 'The Bachelorette' live-tweeted Monday's episode and it was gloriously insane.

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As Season 12 of The Bachelorette starts to wind down, it's hard to keep track of all the contestants we've had to say goodbye to over the past few weeks. Chad Johnson, this season's since-eliminated resident villain/insane person, wants to make sure nobody forgets about him.

If you're not familiar with Chad, here he is eating.

Last night, in true Chad fashion, he went on an epic Twitter rant to comment on JoJo's Fantasy Suite dates with the remaining Bachelors. It was every bit as crazy as you'd expect.

Technically, Chad could just turn the TV off and not watch Robby "pretend to like women," but where's the fun in that?

The Fantasy Suites portion of the season took place in Thailand, a location with a tropical climate, yet Chad was very annoyed that Chase was sweating a little at dinner.

He was also quick to jump to conclusions about Chase's motives for apologizing to JoJo.

It's unclear if Chad, a man who speaks almost exclusively in protein shake metaphors, would be qualified to co-host The Bachelorette, but that'd definitely be very watchable.

When all is said and done, it's very apparent that Chad is just trying to cover up his jealousy over these guys making it to the final three. Despite his macho act, it's obvious he's still secretly pining after JoJo.

Samantha Bee clapped back at her own network on Twitter over a sexist video about Hillary Clinton.

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If you've been watching Samantha Bee crush it on her late night show, you know she is not about to let anyone get away with some sexist, idiotic nonsense, even if the perp is the very network that employees her. Last night, TBS tweeted out some crap, and Bee came back with the quickness.

Move over, TBS, this tweet sucks.

The tweet, which has since been taken down, was originally posted by a bizarre TBS side project that barely has over 100 followers, @thehecklertbs. It read, "Move over Donkey! There's a new mascot in town!" And then a video of Hillary laughing, but her laughs were dubbed over by hyena noises. Get it? Because the donkey is the democratic mascot, and Hillary is... a powerful woman who was dubbed over with hyena noises????

It was dumb, and arguably sexist, so Bee, without concern for her job security, tweeted at her own network to delete their account.

Took the words right out of the hyena's mouth.

This optical illusion hidden in a painting from 1533 will give you major creeps.

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Long before the internet made "the dress" go viral, Swiss painter Hans Holbein painted a mind-melting illusion. In his 1533 painting "The Ambassadors," commissioned for French diplomat Jean de Dinteville, there is something hiding at the bottom of the picture that you may not see at first glance.

The anamorphic skull is put in the painting as a memento mori, or a "reminder of death," and can only be fully seen from a certain angle.

It's definitely an odd and interesting choice that the painter decided to hide "death" in plain sight. Luckily, the French Ambassador didn't mysteriously go missing after receiving his painting.

Paris Hilton's bikini boat Instagrams will make you think it's 2004 again.

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Paris Hilton posted some bikini pics from a yacht in Ibiza, Spain, on Tuesday to remind everyone she's still rich and loving it. Hilton is in Ibiza for her "Foam & Diamonds" party at the Amnesia nightclub, where she serves as host and DJ for foam parties. Here she is, posing on a boat:

#LifeisBeautiful ✨🌈✨

A photo posted by Paris Hilton (@parishilton) on

#SummerVibes ☀️

A photo posted by Paris Hilton (@parishilton) on

#BikiniBae ✨✨👙✨✨

A photo posted by Paris Hilton (@parishilton) on

She also shared a promotional video of her as the DJ at Amnesia. It's more entertaining to watch if you envision the crowd's holding light sabers instead of glow sticks that say "Paris Hilton."

Pics of Paris in a bikini and foam parties? It's really 2004 all over again.

Kendall Jenner defends her love of going braless.

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Kendall Jenner is joining the nipple movement. In a post entitled "Free The Nipple," which is locked behind a paywall on her website/app, the second youngest Jenner daughter speaks about her own nipples, which are locked behind an incredibly gauzy and translucent, nipple-ring-revealing shirt.

Free the nipple rings, too.

"I'm not ashamed of my body," writes the professional model.

"I really don't see what the big deal is with going braless! I think it's cool and I really just don't care! It's sexy, it's comfortable, and I'm cool with my breasts. That's it!"

And these aren't just words of empowerment, she is living her truth. In another post documenting her NYC street style, it is clear she practices what she preaches, and walks around sans bra.

Did you know we were allowed to wear denim skirts again?!?

Good for you, Kendall! This is an issue that is near and dear to many other members of her family, and it's nice to see them, you know, sticking together.

Two nipples, so many styles.

Meg Ryan will reunite with Tom Hanks in her new movie because they always end up together.

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It's been almost 20 years since Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks were last onscreen together in You've Got Mail. We've waited too long, and fortunately for all of us, the wait is almost over. They're reuniting in Ryan's directorial debut, Ithaca, out later this year. What Hanks did on-set to honor his old friend will leave you saying:

Ryan chatted with Entertainment Weekly about the film, and the oh-so-sweet thing Hanks did for her on-set.

Of the film, Ryan says:

"I think it speaks to the complicated things happening [in the world], in the sense of community and cultivation of an individual’s integrity – what Saroyan [William Saroyan, author of the novel Ithaca is based on, The Human Comedy] believes are important antidotes. Hopefully Ithaca is about how fierce and frail life really is."

OK, OK, OK, the movie sounds great, but let's get real, what about her moment with Tom Hanks?

"He’s just so dear. He so did not have to do that [film a cameo]. It took him a day to [shoot his scene]. At the end of his time, he says to the crew, “All right, gather ‘round. Listen, I know we’ve gotten to know each other very well over the last 10 hours together, but I just want to thank you for being here for my friend Meg.” It was such an act of friendship. I love him so much."

Melting, we're melting.


Article 128

5 things you should stream this week.

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It's too f*cking hot to leave your air conditioned living room this week. Here's how you should be passing your time instead:

1. Stranger Things, Netflix

It's the show that everyone on your Facebook feed is talking about, so jump on this thing before the conversation leaves you! I haven't watched it yet (I know, I need to)m but from what I understand it's set in the 1980s, it involves a Stephen-King-meets-Stephen Spielberg plot, and it revitalizes the career of beloved American icon Winona Ryder. Besides, are you going to watch a cheesy horror television show in the winter? Disposable television is what summer is for.

2. Tropic Thunder, HBOGo

Of all the "hard R" comedies that littered cineplexes in the mid-2000s, this might be the funniest. Featuring great performances by Ben Stiller, Jack Black, and especially Robert Downey Jr., it is particularly memorable for going right up to the edge of being offensive while always, somehow, getting away with it. It's leaving HBO in August, so if you haven't seen it yet, get on that.

3. Bojack Horseman (Season 3), Netflix

The just-added third season of the acclaimed Netflix animated comedy apparently features a near-wordless episode set entirely underwater, among other marvels you usually can't find in animated comedies with talking animals.

4. Spring Breakers, Hulu

Sure, it says "Spring" in the title, but what could be more summery than watching a bunch of Disney channel stars make James Franco perform fellatio on a gun? This movie, just added to Hulu this month, is completely bonkers and silly, but director Harmony Korine's crass and commercial take on the American road trip story is fun.

5. Hannibal (Season 3), Amazon

Hannibal could quite comfortably be called one of the best shows of all time—yes, as good as that canonical quadrumvirate of Mad Men, Breaking Bad, The Wire, and The Sopranos—but low ratings led to its cancelation after just three seasons. It's a shame, because it really isn't like anything else on television—creator Bryan Fuller somehow took the strangely homophobic series of books featuring cannibal serial killer Hannibal Lector and turned the story into a mesmerizing, psychedelic gay romance. And no, that description isn't remotely an exaggeration, and and yes, I did have to look up the word "quadrumvirate."

11 people who were burned hard by their ex on Facebook.

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There are three reasons to stay friends with your jerkface ex on Facebook: to see them get fat, to see them get dumped, and to shame them when they least expect it. Here are 11 exes who waited patiently for the right moment to serve up a scorching hot Facebook burn. So worth it.

1. Step one for having a mature divorce: not forgetting you're Facebook friends with your ex.

The reason they got divorced- he doesn't use the right "too."

2. Karma is a b*tch, and so is your ex.

This sick burn was worth staying Facebook friends for.

3. When you're better at growing a goatee than you are at relationships.

"Listen, talk all the sh*t you want about me, but leave my precious goatee out of it."

4. How to find out if your ex is still "burning" for you.

She can't say he never gave her anything.

5. Maybe if we promise criminals Facebook likes they'll all confess this easily.

You're never anonymous​ to your ex.

6. Maybe he was drunk the entire time he was posting this meme?

She has a point. He's too lazy to even delete his ex off of Facebook.

7. Love is hard, punctuation is harder.

Nothing can keep us apart, except commas.

8. The only thing worse than being friends with one ex on Facebook is being friends with two exes on Facebook.

Looks like he's not getting a second chance, or a "15 second" chance.

9. Silence can speak volumes about your relationship with your ex.

*Crickets*

10. Hackers need love too.

Great, now she's going to have to change her password to "password."

11. If you are not friends with your ex on Facebook, then prepare to get a lot more creative with your burns.

Revenge is a dish best served classy.

Kate Beckinsale explains how to get a guy in the 1800s, shows the right amount of ankle.

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Kate Beckinsale recently starred in the Jane Austen adaptation Love and Friendship, and returned from the 1800s to dish out some advice on how to snatch a 19th century gentleman caller. As Austen and your pretentious girlfriends say, "It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife." According to the real 19th century etiquette guides, that wife speaks in a "subdued tone," and never feeds herself from a buffet.

Kate Beckinsale reads dating advice from the 1800s

TBH, Kate Beckinsale could get a guy in any century. http://trib.al/wiOCXpT

Posted by The Scene on Tuesday, July 26, 2016

She has enough comebacks to go on for as long as the courting candle burns.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that one should include a "Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy" GIF whenever they can.

Article 124

Donald Trump stiffed the viral USA Freedom Kids.

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Remember Donald Trump's tween group of singing cheerleaders, the "USA Freedom Kids"? According to the Washington Post, the creator of the group, Jeff Popick, is suing Donald Trump's campaign for breaking his promise to pay them. Their performance at the Trump Rally in Pensacola, FL in January went viral.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=119&v=vPRfP_TEQ-g

Popick is the father of the youngest girl in the group and the author of the lyrics to "Freedom's Call," the song the group performed to the tune of "Over There." He says Trump failed to honor "unwritten agreements." Popick claims that not only was the group not paid for its performance, they were scheduled to perform at another rally in Des Moines, IA, but were told that plans had changed. After they showed up.

Popick was also not reimbursed for the group's travel expenses, and his emails requesting and then demanding payment went unanswered. He told the Washington Post:

This is not a billion-dollar lawsuit. I'm doing this because I think they have to do the right thing. And if this means having to go through the court system to enforce them doing the right thing, then that's what I have to do. I'm not looking to do battle with the Trump campaign, but I have to show my girls that this is the right thing.

Wow, not paying kids? This seems like a new low for Trump, and really begs the age-old question, "are you serious?"

Bank robberies by women are up by 25 percent in the past year because feminism.

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We can not achieve equality in society until women can do the jobs men can do. Like robbing banks. Yes, people still do that, apparently. And more of those people are now women. In 2015, about 7.5 percent of all bank robberies in the US were committed by women, the Orlando Sentinel reports. That's up from about 6 percent in 2005—a 25 percent rise, according to recent FBI statistics. Of course, there are still way more Clydes than Bonnies, but at least that's changing. Feminism!

But before you toast the death of the patriarchy, experts say the reason more women are robbing banks is because the "nature of crime has changed." Essentially, it's gotten less violent and dangerous. “You don’t have to brandish a gun—you don’t have to even have a gun,” said Darrell Steffensmeier, liberal arts research professor of sociology and criminology at Penn State University. “You can just pass them the note. That’s huge.”

Passing a note might not sound as gangster as brandishing a gun and taking hostages. But at least it's cleaner, safer, and achieves the same ultimate goal: gettin' that bling.


Kelly Clarkson makes a guy who resented Michelle Obama’s history lesson delete his account.

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Hillary Clinton's famously called on Donald Trump to delete his account, but when Kelly Clarkson schools a guy on Twitter, they actually go and do it. Clarkson scorched a dude over pointing out an important fact from Michelle Obama's speech so hard, he up and left the site.

Part I: Celebration

Part II: Suggestion

Part III: Clarification

Part IV: Deletion

Perfection.

The American Idol winner is friends with actual American idol Michelle Obama, having collaborated with her on the charity dance jam "This is For My Girls." To hear the song, and to witness more of Michelle's magic, watch M.O. put the "Flo" in "FLOTUS" during Carpool Karaoke.

A guy replaced his family photos with pictures of Steve Buscemi and no one noticed.

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This is Kevin Manion from Wisconisn with his sister Clare. He just pranked his parents really good. Kevin got bored during summer break, so he decided to replace one family photo every day with a picture of Steve Buscemi.

When life hands you a family that doesn't include Steve Buscemi, sometimes you have to improvise.

His goal was to keep doing it until his family noticed.​

Clare tweeted the event, and it has now gone viral. If idle hands are the devil's plaything, does that make Steve Buscemi the devil?

All those movies, and it's come down to this.

When Clare spoke to BuzzFeed News, she told them that her dad noticed the prank after only two days, but it took her mom five.

Got 'em!

That's five days of added Buscemi.

Please say that photo is still there.

Clare told BuzzFeed about the moment her mom figured out what was going on, "She was in the kitchen and could tell something was wrong with my brother’s senior photo, like the colors were wrong, and his head was too big, so she walked over to it and started laughing so hard.”

The real story here is how Clare clearly just framed the proof of her grad picture.

Of course, Twitter ate it up. And came up with some pretty original theories as to why they chose the Bus-man.

And even though it was Clare's account that blew up, Kevin is getting his share of the love.

Only two questions remain: did they leave those pictures up? And if not, can we have them?

Hearing-impaired baby hears for the first time, thinks sounds are hilarious AF.

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Renae Richardson posted a video of her 3-month old son, Jordan, after he received hearing aids and heard the outside world for the first time. He was born with some hearing loss, and had Bronchiolitis​ at 3 weeks old, which caused fluid build-up in his ears. So Jordan has had a rough start, but thankfully things are getting better.

Jordan is a huge fan of these new crazy sounds, and his mom put it best when she said it was "lovely to go to this appointment as see him laughing and cooing like a 'normal' baby should." Giggle fits are the best:

Even the simple rattle was pure joy. Good luck to Jordan, and hopefully he continues to enjoy all the sounds he's going to be bombarded with in order to make him laugh.

Dude fakes appendicitis to hide his hangover and ends up getting an appendectomy.

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We have all faked an illness at some point in our lives, but probably not as masterfully as Reddit user Oblodo, who so convincingly displayed fake stomach pains that doctors performed an appendectomy. He chronicled the entire weird saga on the "Today I F*cked Up" subreddit. Although technically he did not f*ck up today (the operation took place 31 years ago), he does have a scar to remind him of his stupidity daily.

Back in 1985 I had just returned from the US as an AFS student. After school was out for the summer, I had no real plans, and had not a lot of money. I found this interesting advert in a newspaper for a youth camp in DDR in East-Berlin. It said, work 2 weeks of solidarity work with students and have one week of bathing vacation by the Baltic Sea, for a small sum of about $100.

It was organized by the Friendship organization Norway-DDR. I got excited and wanted to see the other side of the iron curtain, since I had just spent one year in USA. It never hurt to see the world, and DDR was not a typical tourists place one could say. I signed up. We were traveling by train, and I was the only boy in a group of 10 people. It was me, and 9 girls. We also had an adult chaperone who was a teacher at a high school and in his 50s.

For the record, AFS is a program for exchange students to study abroad and DDR stands for the Deutsche Demokratische Republik, better known as East Germany until it reunified with the West in 1990. So yea, OP was in a foreign country that doesn't even exist anymore when this whole thing went down.

Moving on.

The whole trip was surreal, and I could write a book about the whole experience. We were greeted by Youth Pioneers in blue uniforms and a marching band. Since we were only 11 people and not the 100 they had hoped for, the whole thing was rather embarrassing and cringe worthy. They set us up in a camp with military style tents, and I notice that most of the other participants in this "solidarity camp" were female.

One huge tent for showering and it was unisex to my shy surprise. The idea of the camp was that students filled the workers jobs so they could have a vacation. The work consisted in digging down a cable along the railroad tracks outside Potsdam. We were driven in huge military style trucks every morning, the kind they transport troops in. The third day, we had wine and a little party with some of the girls in the neighboring tents. I was 17 at the time and had only tried alcohol once before. I drank Sekt, a type of bubbly wine. A lot.

The next day, I woke up to my second hangover ever. It was awful. We drove the trucks, I got sick, and puked in the truck, out of the truck and just everywhere. Not wanting to look like I could not handle alcohol, I said I had a stomach pain when we got to the work place. I got to lay down, and I continued to fake the pain.

Although I must admit I was feeling pretty bad and sick, but had no pain. After an hour, one of the translators came over to me and said they were going to take me to a doctor. He worked for STASI, I later found out. Since we were guests of the DDR government, they wanted to show that they took good care of their guests. We drove about half an hour to the doctors office. The female doctors (not nurses) with strange white hats, lead me in to a bed behind some screens and gave me a rectal thermometer.

The STASI, if you're not aware, were the secret police of East Germany. They were known for their massive domestic spying program and generally just being terrible and scary. Moving on.

They left me and said they would check on me in a few minutes. Not wanting to disappoint them, I put the thermometer on a lamp, and it soon showed I had a low fever. They came back and pressed on my stomach and I politely screamed. They then decided to move me to a hospital by ambulance. The same procedures were done there, but I left the thermometer too long on the lamp, and now it showed me having a high fever. Things went fast from there. Before I could protest, my German was not very good, I was given pre surgery medication and some strong pain medication into my arm. I was put under before I could tell them I was lying. When I woke up, I screamed " Ich hat kein schmerz" ( I had no pain) and discovered they had removed my appendix.

The next 4 days I stayed at the hospital was awful. I got something called Bitter Wasser I think, to get my bowls moving. I got sent home on a plane, and they never admitted that my appendix was not infected. I did not either. So now I have a scar that reminds me that I should never ever lie about serious medical conditions, but on the other hand, I never had to fear Appendicitis if I took a long hike in the mountains... I was young and stupid.

TL;DR I faked stomach pain to cover over the fact I was hungover and got my appendix removed.

Susan Sarandon looks less than happy at the DNC.

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Susan Sarandon appears to be literally having the worst time at the Democratic National Convention.

Sarandon, an ardent Bernie Sanders supporter, is reportedly spending her time at the convention shaking her head in disgust. She's also trash-talking the Democratic Party over the Wikileaks published emails that showed top officials at the DNC were anything but neutral in the primary battle between Hillary Clinton and Sanders. The leaked emails led to the resignation of DNC chairperson, Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz (FL).

Sarandon told The Young Turks:

The critical question is, does it matter? Nixon resigned when they broke into the [DNC] headquarters ... and now you found out all this tampering went on. What does this really say about us if all of this goes by unattended?

Sarandon, no stranger to shade throwing—​remember when she called Clinton more dangerous for America than Trump?—saw Ian McKenna's tweet and responded accordingly.

Gotta give her credit, she's self-aware.

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