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Donald Trump said 'titties' during a speech. It might be the most likable thing he's ever done.

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Given the endless supply of bizarre, horrifying, and surreal detritus that continues to bleed from Donald Trump's wherever, none of us should be surprised that he just said "titties" on national television while giving a speech in Detroit. We should be surprised that he hasn't said it sooner.

Ironically, or not, the word slipped out while he was giving a speech on economics meant to curry favor with the increasingly alienated GOP pro-business base. Here's what he said:

“This business tax will also end job-killing corporate inversions and cause trillions in new dollars in wealth to come pouring into our country and, by the way, into titties like right here in Detroit.”

This leaves us with still more unanswered questions: did he mean to say "towns and cities"? Was is a Freudian slip? Or was it all part of a complex scheme to win over the public with subliminal messaging?

If so, it might be working, because this might be the most likable thing he's ever done. Trump might be a potential geopolitical catastrophe, he's also just a boy standing in front of the world, blurting out the word "titties."


Blac Chyna uses Snapchat to chronicle the worst facial of her life.

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Rob Kardashian's fiancé, Blac Chyna, pregnant and feeling all the things, went in for a beauty treatment that left her covered in a nasty rash. But don't worry, no rash is going to rain on her parade. Chyna took to Snapchat to regale us with her first world problem ordeal. The result? Hilarity!

A fan was able to capture the Snaps and post them to Instagram, and that is what we're most grateful for today.

First, the facial.

Then, what happened after...

Wait, sorry, let's just appreciate what she posted right before this one.

That's better. Back to the facial.

We feel you Chyna. Sometimes we all just want somebody to touch our face.

But as we all eventually learn, sometimes you've just got to take care of yourself!

The shade...

Live and learn, right?

What stage of grieving is denial?

Unrelated, but can Blac Chyna deliver the next State of the Union address? Can we start a Change.org petition for this like yesterday? Somebody get on that...

20 of the funniest, most immature reactions to Donald Trump accidentally saying "titties."

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What happens when Donald Trump can't decide whether to say "towns" or "cities"? Titties happens. He meant to say money would come pouring into cities​ like Detroit. Donald Trump mocked Obama for years for using Teleprompters, but it's apparently harder than it looks.

Here are the 19 funniest reactions to his gaffe:

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Terrifyingly realistic prank fools Scottish dad into thinking Russia launched nukes.

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Here's a "funny" "prank"—a family convinced their grizzled Scottish father that the world had fallen into nuclear warfare by playing a terrifyingly convincing fake BBC news broadcast. Though it's just a joke, the video of this prank is surprisingly emotionally affecting. What it really highlights is how the world really could unravel in the span of 20 minutes. Tough stuff for a Monday.

And this was the fake broadcast the family of pranksters used:

Oh, and that kid running around is gonna be f*cked up from this day.

People reveal 13 secrets big companies actually, truly, for realsies don't want you to know.

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Anyone who has ever been employed knows every company has its share of secrets. The bigger the company, the more important it is that that secret doesn't see the light of day. Thanks to the anonymity of the internet and some truly horrendous identity-hiding screen names, 13 of these secrets are coming out. Companies, prepare to have your whistle blown.

1. plantfuker shines light on a brand new Subway scandal.

At Subway my manager never once bought real mayonnaise. The Light Mayo and the Real Mayo are both Light Mayo. Investigate those fuckers.

2. ​ndividualistic says a customer service rep just needs to hear these magic words.

Ask to have the late fee waived. I literally cannot do anything with it until you specifically ask.

"So you have a late fee of $30 on this."

"Gee that's a lot. Why is it so much?"

"That's the late fee we have. I do apologize for that inconvenience."

"Well I guess I'll have to pay it then..."

"Ok, so your bill is $150."

"Do you realize how much that is?"

"Yes, and I do apologize for the inconvenience."

"Well, can you do something about it?"

Yes. Now I can because you asked. Please stop making me feel guilty that you paid your bill late.

3. And Acicin reveals what a rep does when they don't want the customer to hear their magic words.

Customer service also have mute buttons, and they use it to laugh at you and/or call you names while you're busy complaining

4. ​ChildofValhalla unveils a secret that comes out in the wash.

Our printing department printed your t-shirts wrong, and right now they're filling in the missing ink spots with Sharpies.

5. 11111one11111 shares a fresh restaurant scoop.

Monday's chowder is the weekend's seafood leftovers.

Edit: To answer some questions, yes this is just one example of the overall theme in most restaurants: ZERO WASTE! Any veg trimmings, chicken trimmings, beef bones get boiled to stock. Left over entrées are usually tomorrow's open-faced lunch sammy special. Plastic containers are cut in half so everything is able to be scraped out. Second only to quality and consistency of food, zero waste is the credo to live by.

6. Puff_puff_ass reveals the truth about radio show call-ins.

Nearly every caller you hear on top 40 radio is either a intern or someone else close to the studio, everything is fake. Especially that war of the roses shit.

7. ​borkencode has even worse news about TV.

A lot of people probably know that when a tv show goes into syndication that some scenes will be cut from episodes to make them slightly shorter, to fit in more commercials.

What people don't know is that the show can be slightly sped up as well, to squeeze in just a little more advertising.

8. ​ogenix reveals that printer ink is not just pricey, it's prissy.

Printer ink cartridges are meant to signal that they're empty after a certain number of pages, even if they still have some ink left.

GODDAMMIT ALL THAT INK I WASTED

9. ​derpsha gives every reason to just buy your baked goods in the frozen section.

Grocery store bakeries do not bake the cakes they decorate. That stuff comes in frozen. Stop asking me to bake you a carrot cake. On top of that most of the baking in grocery store bakeries is just pulling frozen pastries or muffins or whatever out of a box and panning it up, then putting it in the proofer /oven. We don't really make things anymore.

10. ​evil420pimp's weird secret is that Dawn is even better than you think.

You use too much dawn dish soap. That stuff is ridiculously concentrated.

11. ​Hullu2000 has a tip for anyone who still uses graphing calculators.

The TI 83/84 signing key

That was a real shit storm.

TL;DR: The public found out a way to install custom firmware on to TI calculators. TI lost their shit.

12. ​isowolf knows why your app keeps crashing.

Every programmer in the world occasionally writes a very bad code that sticks with the app/program forever.

13. ​And finally, The_Hero_of_Legend reveals that you're better off donning that blue apron than work at the second (third?) most magical place on earth.

Merlin Entertainments, the company that runs a wide variety of midway attractions like Legoland Discovery Centers as well as Legoland itself, pays most of their American employees less than Walmart. Oftentimes, employees love the job, but ultimately can't afford to keep it. This causes a near 90% turnover rate.

Kylie Jenner reacted with minimal enthusiasm to Tyga's $200,000 birthday present.

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The love story of Kylie Jenner and Tyga has been a roller coaster of emotions for all of us. But now that the love birds are officially back together, Tyga decided to prove his love by buying Kylie a Mercedes Maybach for her 19th birthday on August 10th.

Most teenagers would be jumping for joy if a $200,000 vehicle was parked in their driveway with a red bow, but Kylie Jenner is not most teenagers, so she just posted a video of her new car to Snapchat and Instagram. She simply wrote "Thank you baby," and tagged Tyga on Instagram.

Thank you baby @kinggoldchains

A video posted by King Kylie (@kyliejenner) on

Not exactly the most enthusiastic response, is it? Maybe cars have lost their appeal for Kylie. After all, Tyga did lease her a Ferrari for her 18th birthday last year. Or maybe Kylie just isn't one of those people who likes to show their emotions. Either way, this 19 year-old now owns a car that none of us could ever dream of affording. Doesn't that make you feel great?

Pets

Taylor Swift just brought back a hairstyle from six feuds ago.

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Taylor Swift is curling her hair again like she did in 2009, when she was America's Princess Victim and Kanye West was the asshole who interrupted her speech at the VMAs. Oh, Tay-Tay. You can't just go back in time that easily. Still, it looks like Swift isn't spending too much time thinking about snake emojis and Kim Kardashian's Snapchat while she's partying with friends in the Hamptons:

I'm just glad she's gotten rid of that white-dyed shag cut. Goth Taylor Swift is a jarring mental image!


The cast of 'Rick and Morty' improvised a brand-new episode just for you.

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During an interview for New York Magazine, the creators and voices of Rick and Morty voiced a whole new episode for fans. Dan Harmon, the show's co-creator, led Spencer Grammer (the voice of Summer), Justin Roiland (Rick and Morty), and writer Ryan Ridley in a 4:20 (nice) improvised episode about getting 120 cc's of feces getting injected into Morty's kneesies.

If you liked that (and you're depressed that Season 3 of Rick and Morty is still a year away), you'll friggin love this actual, real-life court transcript read by Justin Roiland in the voices of both Rick and Morty:

Lin-Manuel Miranda & The Rock teamed up to belt out a 'Beauty and the Beast' ballad for you.

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Congratulations, dear internet, for Hamilton's Lin-Manuel Miranda and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson have together created a version of "Gaston," the classic Disney song from Beauty and the Beast. What have you done to earn this? Who knows, but it will surely leave you thinking "Wait, why aren't they in the upcoming remake?"

Sure, it's no "Tale As Old As Time" or even "Beauty and the Beast," but like, come on, it's cute. (And nobody can top Angela Lansbury.)

It's so cute, but for the life of us we still can't figure out why they aren't in the upcoming live-action remake starring Emma Watson. Like, seriously, makes zero sense.

It's not like Miranda and Johnson are strangers to the world of Disney. Miranda will join Emily Blunt and that up-and-comer Meryl Streep in the remake of Mary Poppins. Plus, Johnson is the voice of the Hawaiian demi-god Maui in Moana.

At least we'll always have this Instagram. Sad face.

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14 'celebrities' who are voting for Donald Trump.

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It's a motley crew to say the least, but Donald Trump has managed to drum up a few "celebrity" endorsements during his ongoing bid for the presidency.

Although most of Hollywood is proudly exclaiming they're "With Her," a few brave and possibly crazy outliers have publicly endorsed the reality star turned politician Donald Trump for President of the United States (let that sink in). If you're worried that you will lose your respect for the stars backing Trump, don't. They never had your respect in the first place.

1. Scott Baio

Chachi loves Trump. Scott Baio supports the Republican Nominee so hard that he even spoke on his behalf at this year's RNC. What a get!

2. Clint Eastwood


Clint Eastwood came out with praise for The Donald in a recent interview in Esquire. Like many old racists, Eastwood praises Trump for speaking his mind, no matter how awful that mind is.

But he's onto something, because secretly everybody's getting tired of political correctness, kissing up. That's the kiss-ass generation we're in right now. We're really in a pussy generation. Everybody's walking on eggshells. We see people accusing people of being racist and all kinds of stuff. When I grew up, those things weren't called racist.

3. Kirstie Alley

Outside the premiere party for #kirstie .. an INCREDIBLE NIGHT!!!

A photo posted by Kirstie Alley (@kirstiealley) on

Alley came out as a Trump supporter back in September via her Twitter account.

But as of July, she has tweeted that she is "sick of both parties." Although she has not officially rescinded her Trump endorsement, it would seem that the former Cheers actress may not be as enthusiastic as she was in her support last year.

4. Kendra Wilkinson Baskett

My look yesterday waking out of lunch.

A photo posted by @kendra_wilkinson_baskett on

People are generally surprised to find that Hugh Hefner's ex-girlfriend considers herself a true conservative, seeing that she literally lived in a sex mansion at 19-years-old, but don't judge a conservative by her cover (or lack thereof). Kendra spoke to Fox News back in March about supporting Trump in a really bizarre statement.

I support Donald Trump, but I also support abortion and a women's right to choice what to do with their body. I'm more of a conspiracy theorist. I think everything is a motive for money.

Conspiracy theorists for Trump!

5. Chuck Norris

After his preferred nominee, Mike Huckabee, dropped out of the race, the Walker, Texas Ranger vowed to support whoever the GOP nominee would be. It ended up being Trump, and he is sticking with his guns (and not just the ones under his sleeves).

After Mike dropped out, I decided to wait until the people chose the candidate they wanted as their next president. Then, I would wholeheartedly support that candidate, which is now Donald Trump.

Chuck is voting for Trump as a way to vote against Hillary, and to maintain solidarity with the Republican Party.

6. Tom Brady

Patriot Tom Brady was outed as a Trumpian when someone snapped this pic of the infamous red "Make America Great Again" hat in his locker room.

He later said in an interview on WEEI’s The Dennis & Callahan Show that he is supporting Trump because they're good friends. That's a reason, I guess.

Donald is a good friend of mine. I have known him for a long time. I support all my friends. That is what I have to say.

7. Ted Nugent

Nugent picked the perfect place to endsore Trump—the annual NRA convention. He went on a bit of a rant, particularly against Vermont senator Bernie Sanders, telling him to "eat sh*t and die." Charming.

In the speech, he also spoke openly about how much he liked the idea of banning Muslims in a charming analogy to dogs, so yeah. He is pretty on board with Trump.

8. Mike Tyson

I'll autograph a boxing glove to one of my fans - find out how, go to MikeTysonLive.com

A photo posted by Mike Tyson (@miketyson) on

Tyson endorsed Trump on Huffpost Live, saying that it was time for a change after eight years of Obama.

He went on to tell The Daily Beastback in January that he is supporting his longtime friend because they are both power hungry dudes?

We’re the same guy. A thrust for power, a drive for power. Whatever field we’re in, we need power in that field. That’s just who we are.

9. Gary Busey

My Halloween costume

A photo posted by Gary Busey (@thegarybusey) on

After appearing on Celebrity Apprentice twice, Busey decided to endorse Trump. Ah, that highly coveted Busey endorsement.

I know him personally. I know him professionally. He's a great guy. He's sharp. He's fast. He can change the country after the last eight years.

He also endorsed Trump back in 2012 when we were all still laughing at the prospect of Donald Trump getting close to the White House. Well, who's laughing now?

10. Azealia Banks

Azealia Banks '09.

A photo posted by Azealia Banks (@azealiabanks) on

Azealia Banks may be banned from Twitter, but she is not banned from the voting booth. In a now-deleted Twitter rant, she said she is voting for Trump because he "is full of shit." Finally, some truth.

She tweeted, "I only trust this country to be what it is: full of shit. takes shit to know shit so we may as well, put a piece of shit in the White House," and then went on to say, "I have no hope for America. It is what it is. Capitalist, consumerist, racist land of make believe. Its inherently evil and must feed ..."

What? Wait, it get's weirder.

"Just how this web of lies and oppression has spawned itself into this global influence and made people proud to be a part of it." Before she wrapped it up by saying, "In conclusion, I think Donald trump is evil like America is evil and in order for America to keep up with itself it needs him."

Wow. What a glowing endorsement.

11. Hulk Hogan

Former WWE Superstar Hulk Hogan wants two old white dudes with horrible hair in the White House, and went on the record to say he wanted to be Trump's VP. I mean, we keep saying this election couldn't get any crazier, so would you even be surprised if Pence gets dumped for the Hulk? He then got serious about why he wants to vote for Trump.

"This country needs to be shaken up. It needs to be shaken to its very core, and Donald Trump is doing that."

Well, that is not inaccurate.

12. Tila Tequila

Unhinged former reality star and current Nazi is backing Trump.

Yes. That is real. No further comments.

13. Stephen Baldwin

Usually, when you are picking the leader of the free world, you want someone with knowledge and experience to ensure that your country isn't run into the ground. Not Stephen Baldwin! He likes that Trump has no idea what he's doing.

This is what Baldwin told FOX Business Network’s Stuart Varney.

I think he’d make a great president because he’s not a politician and that’s what we see this surge of voters gathering around in support of him, it’s because he’s telling it like it is.

A politician having the most prestigious job in politics? Nah, let's get the misogynistic orange guy from The Apprentice.

14. Teresa Giudice

Famed table-flipper and convicted felon Teresa Giudice of The Real Housewives of New Jersey gave Trump her stamp of approval on Watch What Happens Live to a highly uncomfortable Andy Cohen.

Yea, although Teresa said she is planning on voting Trump, she actually can't vote until February 2018, when her community service sentence is officially over. Should someone tell her? No one tell her.

The 25 funniest reactions to day 3 of the Olympics.

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American swimmer Lilly King beat her Russian rival by less than a second to win the 100m breaststroke! Everyone freaked out about "cupping," an alt medicine technique popular at the Olympics and invented by octopuses. Also, Michael Phelps was pictured glowering, to the internet's delight. All this and more, in the 25 best reactions to the third day of the Olympics!

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This is what your body actually does with protein, so you can dismiss diet fictions.

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If you've ever even thought about eating better or getting in shape, you were probably immediately bombarded from friends and websites with dubious advice about protein—so here is SciShow to quickly set the record straight. Nutrition is full of pseudoscience for a very simple reason: everyone eats, so everyone thinks they're an expert. So, here's what protein actually does.

The most common mistake people make is "muscle is protein, therefore the protein you eat gets added directly to your muscle." Wrong. The kinds of proteins muscles are made of have to be built from scratch inside your body. Protein you eat is broken down into amino acids, which are then rebuilt into stuff your cells can use. Your steak doesn't go to your biceps, because your steak is a cow, and your arms are not compatible with cow-muscle.

There are only a few amino acid compounds your body specifically needs to obtain from foods. The others can be manufactured in your body, so you don't need as much meat and/or tofu as you might think. Your body DOES use amino acids to make new muscles, but it DOES NOT store them for very long. If you eat a steak for lunch but don't work out before dinner, it'll just turn to waste and fat like everything else you eat. If you down a protein shake near the time of a workout, your body will have more amino acids sitting around to quickly rebuild muscle, but it's hardly a miracle boost.

The short answer is that unless you're a) sick, b) bulking up very quickly or c) an infant—the ultimate form of bulking up quickly—you probably get enough protein. If you want to gain muscle, you should focus more on the actually-working-out part.


Sports

Girl gives boyfriend a pamphlet of 'rules' for his vacation that's either cute or psychotic.

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So your boyfriend is going on vacation, and you want to make him a list of "rules" he should follow while you're away from each other. Is this a red flag or just cute? Well, this woman did it, and her boyfriend posted it to Twitter, so now it's up to the internet to decide. Let's break down these "rules."

1. Make sure your phone is charged at ALL times! Phone me at least once a day (2 mins).

Well, keeping your phone charged is practical, but putting a time requirement on communication is weird. Who can sustain a 2-minute conversation in the text era?

2. No girls whatsoever. Don't look! Don't talk! Do not touch!!! (Cheat & I will destroy everything celtic, I will also make your life a living hell. KIM WILL BE TOLD 2 :-) )

(Side note: The names are confusing. The tweet says "Whitneys," but the rules say Kim, who is apparently an all-seeing, terrifying spymaster.)

"I will destroy everything celtic?" We know from the boyfriend's profile that this couple is from Scotland. Is she literally going to lay waste to all of Scotland, Ireland, Wales and Brittany in retaliation for cheating? Will she cross the Pond and destroy the Boston NBA team, too? Who cares, this is riveting.

3. Do not follow girls on social media...

4. Tattoo = NAW, you'll be checked when home.

5. DON'T mix drink!! "DRUGS ARE FOR MUGS"

6. If on boat party, no drinking games with the opposite sex.

Does this include family members? Lesbians? So confused.

7. Stay in your own bed!

8. Dinny buy girls drink. That money can be spent on me. xo

(Editor's note: Scottish people say "dinnae" instead of "do not" and "did not.")

9. Text Kim Everyday! She'll be worrying.

Contrary to common belief, talking about yourself in third person actually means you're mentally stable. Points for Kimmy.

10. You tell every girl about me OK - if someone flirts, WALK AWAY - NO PHOTOS WITH RANDOM GIRLS OR SC STORIES

Something tells us she doesn't want him to take pictures with other girls, what do you think?

Kim closes with...

Have a nice flight, stay safe.

Hmmm, this is a tough one, but we're going to have to go with...

Sorry Kimbo, we gotta call 'em like we see 'em.

The 25 funniest Twitter reactions to Michael Phelps giving his rival the world's greatest stink eye.

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Michael Phelps' seething grimace before the men's 200m butterfly has officially dethroned Oily Tonga Flagbearer as the greatest meme of the Olympics so far.

The most decorated Olympian of all time got in the zone before getting to the pool, eyeing down his opponent, South African swimmer Chad le Clos, like you eye down someone who's cut you off in traffic or stolen the last fry. Apparently Le Clos had "warmed up with a little dancing," and Phelps didn't love it. Here are Twitter's best uses of this universal emotion.

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The Rock unloads on his 'chicken sh*t' 'Fast 8' costars in seething Facebook post.

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Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson usually devotes his social media presence to motivational posts and videos of him lifting weights, but on Monday the wrestler-turned-actor posted a very uncharacteristic, very rage-induced rant to his Facebook page and Instagram.

In the post, the WWE Superstar slams some of his Fast 8 male costars, even though he is very vague on the details and doesn't name names.

This is my final week of shooting Fast & Furious 8. There's no other franchise that gets my blood boiling more than this one. An incredible hard working crew. Universal Studios Entertainment has been great partners as well. My female co-stars are always amazing and I love 'em. My male co-stars however are a different story. Some conduct themselves as stand up men and true professionals, while others don't. The ones that don't are too chicken shit to do anything about it anyway. Candy asses. When you watch this movie next April and it seems like I'm not acting in some of these scenes and my blood is legit boiling - you're right.

Bottom line is it'll play great for the movie and fits this Hobbs character that's embedded in my DNA extremely well. The producer in me is happy about this part. Final week on FAST 8 and I will finish strong.
‪#‎IcemanCometh‬‪#‎F8‬‪#‎ZeroToleranceForCandyAsses‬

Woahhhhh! Who pissed off The Rock?

Well, according to IMDB, The Rock's male costars include the likes of Scott Eastwood, Jason Statham, Vin Diesel (a.k.a, smaller Rock), Kurt Russell, Ludacris, and TyreseGibson, so it's almost impossible to put your finger on who the "chicken sh*t candy asses" in question are.

But like, better not mess with The Rock, guys. He could beat you all up.

Republican Senator Susan Collins says she won't vote for Trump for reasons that aren't even political.

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Susan Collins, a Republican Senator from Maine—not to be confused with Suzanne Collins, Hunger Games author, who is probably thrilled at the looming prospect of dystopia—published an op-ed in the Washington Poston Monday explaining why she will break from her party and not support GOP presidential candidate Donald "Titties" Trump. It's not because she disagrees with his political views, but rather because she thinks of him what you've often said aloud while reading the latest outrageous Trump quotation: "What an unbelievable asshole!"

Of course, she puts it much more delicately:

My conclusion about Mr. Trump’s unsuitability for office is based on his disregard for the precept of treating others with respect, an idea that should transcend politics.

Oh snap! That's the respectable newspaper equivalent of, "Who the fuck does this dipshit think he is?!"

Collins explains that three incidents in particular got her to this point, though surely it was hard to narrow down: 1) "his mocking of a reporter with disabilities," 2) his "repeated insistence that Gonzalo Curiel, a federal judge born and raised in Indiana, could not rule fairly in a case involving Trump University because of his Mexican heritage," and 3) "criticism of the grieving parents of Army Capt. Humayun Khan."

And no, Collins doesn't go so far as to endorse Hillary Clinton. Trump would have to insult a whole lot more Gold Star parents for her to do that.

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