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Ashton Kutcher may have just revealed his baby's sex by accident.

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Ashton Kutcher may have accidently let it slip that he and his wife Mila Kunis are expecting a baby boy. Kunis and Kutcher already have a 2-year-old daughter named Wyatt together.

Kutcher spoke to Savannah Guthrie on The Today Show about being a dad for the second time, revealing that Wyatt points to her mother's growing baby bump and says "baby brother" while she points at her father's belly and says "beer." Kids really do say the darndest things.

Punk'd by his own kid.

It is unclear if Wyatt actually knows the sex of her sibling-to-be or if she is just saying cute things because she is a toddler, but regardless, she already seems like she is going to be a pretty cool big sister.


Dad builds insane backyard obstacle course for his tiny Ninja Warrior daughter.

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Five-year-old Lylah is a tiny Ninja Warrior, so her dad Gavin built her a totally legit, totally awesome obstacle course in their backyard. She absolutely crushes it. Two minutes and 23 seconds? What a time! And all in front of a crowd of adoring stuffed animal fans.

We're definitely going to be seeing this little champion on a future season of the actual American Ninja Warrior. Until then, we hope she invites lots of friends over for playdates. Her dad has definitely given her the coolest backyard in the neighborhood.

30-year-old man gets breast implants to help him find a job, regrets it immediately.

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A man named Mr. Ho from Zhuzhou City, China found an innovative way to stand out in a tough job market—he got fake boobs. The 30-year-old Ho spent more than $5,600 on the implants in August, after reading in the news that women have more career options (because China is the opposite of the US, apparently). He borrowed the money and didn't tell his family about the operation, but they noticed. How could they not notice?

Mr. Ho and his sweet cans.

Predictably, Ho's boobs wound up chafing his relationship with his family. In an interview with hunandushi.net, his mother said, "I was so scared, how can it be like that? How can a man with such big boobs face others?"

Legally, we don't have to blur this image. That's messed up right?

Ultimately, the misguided young man was forced to abandon his newfound lady lumps. On September 26, the implants were successfully removed. He is still recovering from the surgery.

All's well that ends well.

Best of luck on Mr. Ho in his future job search. He might have made a mistake, but we've got to respect his hustle.

Here's the full video report from Chinese television:

Shudder at 10 true, terrifying stories from people who lived through them.

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October is here, bringing with it Halloween and jack-o-lanterns and ghosts and things that go bump in the night. There's no better time to build a campfire, toast some s'mores, and read creepy stories about all manner of monsters (some of which are human). To get you started, here are 11 really scary stories culled from Reddit*, which is possibly the scariest place of all.

1. Phoboss took a cemetery tour that ended up being scary for reasons not having to do with dead people.

I went on a guided cemetery tour at night. About six or seven of us were standing around a tomb listening to the story of how the inhabitant had killed himself with a gun when all of a sudden there was a big flash and the whole sky lit up green with smaller flashes. We found out later that we had witnessed a meteor breaking up. So the tour guide takes a moment, recovers from the surprise, and continues his story about how some decades after the poor chap had killed himself someone broke into his tomb and stole his skull.

We then moved on, and walked further into the cemetery when we were startled by a loud bang. We shrugged it off as a car backfiring, laughed nervously at how on edge we were and continued the tour. Shortly after we hear a couple more bangs in quick succession, and one of the tour party commented that they were pretty sure they were gunshots. There was another bang, closer. Definitely a gunshot. Then we saw a light in between some of the headstones and I kid you not, we saw the figure of a man carrying a shotgun, slowly coming from the direction of the tomb we had just been at. We froze. I looked over to the tour guide, thinking it was some prank he plays on all his customers, but he was completely white and was backing away. It was a man with a shotgun and he was walking towards us. He lifted a flashlight and pointed it directly at us. Several of us ducked behind the headstones as he yelled, "Get out of here! What the hell are you doing in this place!?" Turns out the city council pays some guy to shoot possums in the cemetery and they forgot to warn the tour company.

2. Penguinluvinman might have gotten a 911 call from a ghost.

I used to work as a 911 operator in a relatively large metro area. One night at about 3 am or so I answered a call from an elderly lady who said she didn't feel good. I tried to get more info about what was wrong, chest pain, trouble breathing, headache, is she diabetic etc. I got her address and age, she said no one else was home but the door was unlocked so they could go in. No matter what else I asked about what was wrong, all she would say is "I don't feel good, can you please send someone to help me?"

After a few min she said "I'm gonna put the phone down for a minute, I need to go to the bathroom." I tried to get her to stay on the line with me, told her she can do whatever she needs to get ready but I'd like to be able to stay in contact in case there's a problem. She said "I'm gonna put the phone down, I'll just be a minute."

A couple min passed, then the fire department called on scene so I just disconnected and didn't think much about it. Told them the patient advised front door is unlocked and she was in the bathroom. A couple more min and the one of the firefighters called over the air with a weird tone and said "Fire alarm (which is how they addressed dispatch)...uh how exactly was this called received?" I told them call was first party from the patient's home phone approx 8 min ago. He didn't respond over the air, but called the desk from his cell phone, which usually only happens when something weird is going on that they don't want broadcasted since anyone can listen to the radios.

On the phone he said "are you sure this wasn't a third party call from a family member or something?" I said "negative, caller advised 'I don't feel good' and said no one else was home, so to the best of my knowledge, the caller is the patient...have you made contact?" He said "yea, she was in the bathroom like you said, but she's been dead for about 12 hours. Cold to the touch, fully livid, full rigor, we're gonna need a deputy out here."

Afterwards we pulled the tapes of the radio and phone calls and checked the timestamps, address, phone number, and went over everything a few times to see if I missed something. I called them back in the morning after the shift to see if they had anymore info, but they were just as weirded out as we were. The phone was in the living room and the patient was in the batbroom, but the call was definitely from that phone. Still have no idea what the most likely explanation is.

TL;DR: got a 911 call from a dead woman because she didn't feel good

3. Gigglebutts found herself stalked by someone way scarier than a ghost.

In college, I went to Champaign, IL and saw Big Gigantic. Afterward, boyfriend and I stopped to get gas and I was thirsty as hell for non-venue priced beverages, so I went into the little shop while he filled up the car. It was ~1am so the shop was deserted except me and the cashier, whom I greeted casually and walked to the back giant wall of refreshments. I'm staring and pondering for a while before I realize the guy has made his way over and is staring intently from a few feet away. "Do I look like Jonathan Taylor Thomas?" He asks. "Uh...what?" I answer, not entirely sharp after a concert and wondering if I missed something. "Jonathan Taylor Thomas. A lot of people say I look like him." I should pause the story here to tell you that this 20 or 30something gentleman bore zero resemblance to the pre-teen hunk of the nineties. This guy was pale, dark hair, kind of mushy-faced with no distinctive qualities. I'd compare him to maybe a younger Lutz from 30 Rock. Anyway. I'm staring at him and getting nervous and not sure what to say. "I guess?" I stammer, hoping this will end the line of questioning. "Oh! In what way?" "What?" I grab a Sprite bc I am now getting a little freaked out and do not have the luxury of deliberating any longer. This guy has not cracked a smile and something just seems very, very off. We walk to the register and he continues. "In what ways do I look like Jonathan Taylor Thomas, specifically?" "I...uh..." He's ringing me up and I'm looking through my bag for my wallet trying to think of a competent answer. "In the nose? I guess?" He seems relieved. That's when my boyfriend appears at the glass door entrance a few feet away. He tries to open it. It's been locked. All the blood drains out of my face and I start feeling very, very sick. He seems surprised by my boyfriend's presence and looks at me, realizing whatever he had in mind for me is no longer in the cards. Without a word he unlocks the door and I gtfo. Boyfriend is confused and I sit in the car and breathe and drink my Sprite and tell him what happened and we both shiver the rest of the way home.

4. Necrorider basically lived a real life X-Filesepisode.

Where I live, there's a train that goes from my school to my home. The distance between those stations is about 15 minutes.

One day, my friend and I left school together and boarded the train. We were both getting off at the same stop. Let's just say the station at the train is Station 1 and our home is Station 5. The distance between each station is about 3 minutes. Anyway, we board at 3pm and chat. We've taken this train more than a hundred times before, meaning we know how long it takes, what our stops look like etc. Even the train announcer announces the station as well.

We constantly look outside for scenery to tell us its our stop and check out watch and stations we're at. We continue chatting, and then, as usual, we get off the train. We exit, turn right to take the escalator down and... it's not there. Confused, we give a quick look around and notice we're not at station 5, we're at station 8. No problem, we just sat past right? So we checked out watch. 3:15.

Both him and I have never been able to deduce what happened. The time needed to reach station 8 could not just take 3:15, it would at least be 3:25. The train itself is automated and so the distance and time needed never changes. We take the opposite train and discuss what just happened. We both saw that the last station the train announced was Station 4, as was the scenery we saw a million times over, passing by a school we always use as our landmark.

Up to this day I can't find a reasonable explanation of what happened. And still creeps me out to this day.

5. Icvotria's story might keep you from ever getting into bed again.

I woke up in the middle of the night last week and looked over at my boyfriend, sleeping soundly next to me. I was admiring his nice face, thinking what long, pretty eyelashes he had. I was half asleep, comfy and warm, and everything was lovely. As I became more alert, it slowly began to dawn on me that, though he does have very long, pretty eyelashes, they weren't quite that long. That's when the spider started moving across his face.

THERE WAS A FUCKING MASSIVE SPIDER ON HIS EYEBALL.

6. Dijibaby7's job as an ambulance driver was terrifying in ways he never imagined.

Was an EMT working the 4am-4pm shift. We pick up our rig and get told to post (hang out and wait for a call) in a really shitty part of town.
I parked behind this shopping center where all of the businesses had closed down due to the lack of people around that general area. It was a lot of trailer parks, really run-down apartments, and whatnot. I picked this place because the sun was going to rise in an hour or so and my partner and I both wanted to take a nap until a call came through the radio to us.
My partner has no problem sleeping while sitting straight up in the front of the ambulance. I absolutely cannot do this, so I went in the back and laid down on the bench to try and nap. The thing about our shitty old ambulance was that you couldn't open the side door from the inside. So I had to get out, go through the side door (not the very back double doors) and lay down. I left the side door a little bit cracked open for when a call came though so I could jump into the front to respond.
About 5 minutes of me laying there and my I hear my partner call me. "Hey dude. You awake?" "Yeah.. what's up?"
"That person over there has been staring at us for a while." Across the street there was a sidewalk along the side of a park. I could make out a faint shadow of a person. Knew it was someone because their cigarette butt flickered every time they took a puff. The streetlight was super dim but I could tell that they were there, just fucking staring at us. It was super weird so we watched them for a bit. After about 5 more minutes of us just watching, the person walks away. We joke about how weird people are, being up at 5am roaming around some sketchy park. I lay back down and start to doze off. I wake up to my partner saying "HOLY SHIT DUDE!" So I pop my head up into the front cabin. The person was standing like 20 feet from our ambulance, dressed in all black, staring at him. Eyes locked. I look at her face and I shit you not, she looks like the fucking girl from The Ring. She had pitch black straight hair, wearing all black, very light skinned, the street light made her look like she was white as paper.
My partner is absolutely terrified as they've entered some weird sort of staring match. I told him to hop over into the driver seat and get the fuck out of there. He says "I can't. I'm too scared to move." Shit, well I guess I have to squeeze from the back though this little ass space to get into the driver's seat.
I jump up and try to get back into the front cabin. It's a tight squeeze because I'm a bigger guy, but I make it through. She apparently takes notice of me moving and starts power walking straight to us. I've never been so fucking freaked out in my life. As she gets super close, I realize she's looking at the side door that I left a little bit cracked open! I'm thinking "Fuck I forgot to close it!"
I get a good look at her face. She's noticed that door and I know she's gonna try to get in. Maybe she's going try to kill me? I don't know but I have to get the fuck out. Her whole body is shaking as she gets closer and closer, still staring at my partner. She gets up right next to his window and just stares at us both in the eyes. I get into the front about with about 1 second to spare, start the ambulance, and peel the fuck out. We never posted there again.

7. Genegnome started therapy to help resist giving in to compulsive urges, but unfortunately the timing was not good.

I was previously diagnosed with OCD, but it's now a retracted diagnosis in that I don't experience compulsions now but still obsessions. About two years ago, it was still compulsive too, and I was going through treatment for it, trying to resist those compulsions.

My obsessions generally surrounded my family and friends dying or getting really ill, and I was constantly getting intrusive thoughts that if I didn't do a certain thing RIGHT NOW, my mum/dad/brother would die. Naturally, I would just go along along with the compulsions.

First time in the treatment program I fully manage to resist a compulsion is after several intrusive thoughts about my grandad dying. I don't do the compulsion, feel really ace, everything goes okay.

The next day, my grandad is diagnosed with colon-rectal cancer with a low survival rate.

Rationally, I know that I didn't cause that just because I didn't touch a door handle in time or whatever, but in the OCD mindset I was in then, I was convinced and it was very creepy for me.

8. StuftRug probably never peed again.

When I was 8 my parents were going through a rough patch in their marriage and my dad was briefly living in a broken down old RV parked in a friends front yard that wasn't hooked up to anything (classy right?). No electricity no water no nothing. We had to stay there overnight on the weekends we were with him and it always made me nervous. The RV couldn't even be locked. Well one night I woke up in the middle of night, pitch black with nothing but a tiny flashlight, and I had to pee worse than I have ever had to pee. I was already scared to death of the dark so I woke my dad up and pleaded to let me pee in the bathroom or maybe even the sink but he was grumpy and said no just pee outside there's nothing out there. I made my way to the door, stepped out into the grass, lowered by pajamas, and started going but as soon as I did some creepy as fuck voice said to me "hey kid come here" along with some rustling in the bushes. I bolted back inside peeing all over myself crying in fear and grabbed the door handle to hold it shut. I heard more rustling outside but then it stopped so I let go and with my little dinky flashlight went over to the window, pulled down the blinds just a bit, and shined my light right into a smiling set of teeth. I didn't see the rest of the face as I jumped back into my little bed throwing the blanket over my head and cried until the sun came up. People act like I'm being a pussy when I say I'm not too fond of the dark but I still can't handle pitch black nights.

9. Bingbong1234 story of the Whistler seems too freaky to be true, but he's got video proof.

When I was about 8 years old I was taking my dog for a walk through the neighborhood with my mom. It was maybe 11pm. We live next to a swamp/woods area on the edge of our neighborhood in Lansing, Michigan. I remember it being very silent and slightly windy. From down in the swamp we heard somebody whistling at us. It sounded sort of like a bird, but each whistle was different enough where the lack of consistency made it human-like. The whistle sounded higher, then lower. I can't really describe it. My mom had a concerned, slightly terrified look on her face and grabbed my hand and said that we should go inside quickly. I didn't understand because I was too young, but seeing my mom freak out made me freak out too. After a while, though, I kind of forgot about it.

Two years later, I was taking my dog out again, late at night. There is a large bush that could easily obscure a person behind it just next to the front door. As I was finishing the walk, the whistling noise started again, same pitches, same inconsistent, human-like tones. As soon as I heard it, a chill went down my spine as I remembered exactly the feeling of seeing my mom, terrified, looking down into the swamp at something I couldn't see (maybe she couldn't either). I ran inside as fast as possible.

Years went by and I thought about it less and less. I told only a handful of people, and eventually it slipped from my mind.

Fast forward to last summer: I'm 24, started dating my girl Sarah. We moved out to South Dakota for work. For Independence day, we decided to go to Pierre, SD and watch the fireworks along the bank of the Missouri river. There was a free camping spot behind a hospital where you could pitch your tent, hang out, and see the fireworks up the river. We were near the end of the campground and there were very few people around us. As it was getting dark, the fireworks began. They were pretty far away, so the illumination they brought was very little. Thus, we had to sit right at the edge of the river to be able to see them. A huge thunderhead was moving in and a storm was imminent, so the air seemed electric and the wind was picking up. The atmosphere was eerie to say the least.

The police boats herded all the other boats off of the river and had left our area to do that elsewhere. Most of the other campers walked up the river to have a better view of the fireworks, but Sarah and I stayed back and were drinking PBR tallboys and kicking it. Suddenly, we heard the sound of a paddle methodically dipping into the water. We saw a figure steering a canoe about 20m off shore. Sarah decided to go get more beers from the car, leaving me alone to stare at this mystery person. And then, of course, they whistled at me. My entire body was frozen and covered in goosebumps. It was the exact same whistler from my childhood, more than a decade earlier. I looked at the figure, but it was much too dark to discern who it could be. They were wearing a hat. When they were perpendicular to the shore from me, they stopped paddling, turned the canoe to face directly at me, and whistled right at me. I was so frightened I stood up and shouted at them "who are you?!?" They didn't say anything, just whistled a couple more times, turned the canoe 180 degrees, and paddled out of sight.

I'm a videographer, so I already had my camera by my side and was taking video of the fireworks. As the canoe was almost out of sight, I grabbed my camera and got a shot of them whistling as they went away. When Sarah came back from getting beers, she was very confused as to why I was so freaked out. When I explained, she was freaked out a bit too. I was convinced we would both be murdered that night. How did this whistling person follow me, after 14 years, all the way to South Dakota? Was it a coincidence? Why was it the same whistling noise?! Who was that person and where did they go?!?! So many questions still unanswered. To this day I'm more afraid of being outside in the dark where I might hear that whistling again.

I'm open to any explanations.

Here is the link

When I was still getting shots of the fireworks I heard the whistling starting. I was too afraid at that moment to point the camera directly at the canoe, so I just turned my microphone towards it and kept a low-key shot facing down river towards the fireworks. If you wear headphones you can hear it better. It's the two note whistle, high then low. You can hear me ask my gf "Are you whistling? Is that you?" She said no but I wasn't sure so I told her "Stop it!" because I was getting scared.

The last shot I boosted the brightness as much as I could and still make out the person in the canoe. It looks like they're wearing a red sweater or something.

10. Bingbong1234's not even the only one who's heard this mysterious Whistler. Check out happy_go_lucky11's tale.

Growing up my mom my was a bartender, she was a single parent, so I took care of my little brother most nights. One night while I was making dinner I kept hearing a strange whistling sound, but I didn't think much of it because it was storming pretty hard outside. But the whistling continued and it started to sound more like a melody than whistling from a storm. I started to get a little freaked out and asking my little brother if he was hearing it too; he wasn't. Eventually the whistling stops, but it's still storming pretty badly. Fast forward to the end of the night when I'm going to bed. I'm climbing up the ladder of my bunk bed and my tv shuts off. I think maybe the power went out, but the hallway light is still on. I try to turn it back on and nothing happens, so I reach around my tv stand and realize that it's been unplugged. At the same time I hear the whistling, only this time its not in the distance, it sounded like someone was whistling directly into my ear. I could almost feel their breath, it sent chills down my spine; it still sends chills down my spine. At that moment I took off running out of our house screaming! We lived in an apartment with 3 other units, so I woke the neighbors above us. They were younger couple with two kids and offered to come check out our house. I could tell at the time the guy thought I was just a stupid kid hearing things, but was trying to make me feel better. My brother and I waited outside of our apartment while he went inside to check it out for us. After a few minutes he came back and he seemed a little agitated and asked if you're playing a prank on him. This really scared me and I told him we weren't playing a prank on him. He could probably see we were telling the truth by our faces, because I could see the fear roll over his face. He said he looked everywhere and did not find anyone, but was convinced someone was in our home. They invited us to stay in their apartment until my mom was home from work, because they didn't feel comfortable with us staying alone. I never heard the whistling again, but so many other strange things happened to my brother and me in that apartment. I'm convinced it was haunted. I'm not sure if the story will be scary to any of you, but that was the most terrified I've ever been in my life.

Edit: A lot of you have linked 'The Whistler' video - very creepy! After listening to it I really feel like that's what I heard, but not sure if I'm just attributing that to what I heard. Either way it was very close to what I was hearing and gave me chills!

BONUS: Uh-oh, guys—the Whistler's real. At least according to Gaashura and Wikipedia.

In my country (Venezuela) there is a legend about a guy called "El Silbon" (The whistler). A sort of damned soul that warns people of their coming death.

https://es.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/El_Silbón

I'm not making this shit up, I'll try to translate parts from the article for you to see if they fit what you experienced:

The legend is that of a young man who killed his father as a revenge because he had killed his wife and called hed a "whore". After this event, his grandfather had him tied to a pole in the middle of a field and whipped him, had his wounds cleaned with "aguardiente"(drinking alcohol) and released him with two rabid and hungry dogs but before release he cursed him to carry his father's bones for the rest of eternity.

He has a particular whistling similar to Music Notes CDEFGAB in that order, going up to F and then going low to B. It's said thay when the whistling is heatd closely there is no danger, because he is really far, but when the whistling sounds far he is really close.It's also said that the whistling announces the death of those who hear it. He can be anywhere at any tine. It seems that the only thing that can save the person that hears it from afar is the bark of a dog, because he is afraid of it, also of chili peppers and whips.The soul takes revenge on womanizing men.

Many inhabitants of Los Llanos speak of seeing him, particularly during summer, season in which the venezuelan savannah sears under the strenght of drought and El Silbon sits in the stumps of trees and gathers dust with his hands. But he is primarily encountered in times of humidity and rain, when the spectre roams hungry for death and avid to punish the drunk, the whoremongers and from time to time an innocent victim. It's said that he sucks on the navel of drunk men when he finds them alone to drink the alcohol that they drank and he rips appart the whoremongers, he takes off the bones and puts them inside the bag in which he carries his dad's remains.

Some versions say that he looks like a long giant, six meters tall who walks from treetop to treetop, while he emits his terrifying whistling and rattles inside the dusty old bag, the pale bones of his misfortuned father, or as some claim, his multiple victims. Other versions state that he presents as the shade of a tall and slender man with a hat, specially to drunk people.

It is said that, El Silbon, may appear near a house on some nights, leaving the bag on the floor and counting the bones one by one. If one or more people hear him, nothing will happen, but if no one hears, by dawn a family member will die in his sleep.

In the Colombian eastern Llanos, where he is called "El Silbador", they believe it's the wandering soul of a party loving womanizer who died in solitude, and people claim that he seeks the company of someone who dares ride horseback late at night. But this kind version is an exception because, also in Colombia, some others say he chases pregnant women, that his whislting penetrates the ear, chills, and that, if someone hears a high pitch tone it omens the death of a woman, while a low pitch tone omens the death of a man. In any case, that woman or man is generally someone known by the one that heard the whistling.

Edit: Finished translating. This gave me chills dude, I'm not one to believe folklore, but your story is way too similar to just ignore it, mainly because you have no way at all to know about this particular legend.

EDIT 2: I just saw the video, and as my countrymen would say: EL COÑO DE SU MADRE! That's the creepiest shit I've ever seen, and I can't believe OP delivered proof.

*Some stories were edited slightly for length.

Woman boldly shares hospital photo after surgery to remove a sex toy.

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An English woman named Emma Phillips reportedly rushed to the hospital for emergency surgery after a vibrator got... lost... inside... her.

The 24-year-old student teacher apparently posted the following picture to Facebook:

Her boyfriend tried to get it out with barbecue tongs

Posted by Metro on Thursday, October 6, 2016

And added the caption:

When a bit of Saturday morning playtime results in spending the day in Wrexham hospital having a nice pink vibrator surgically removed from your bowel areas.... whilst it's still vibrating. If you can't on a Saturday when can ya?

According to the Daily Mail, Phillips looked around for the sex toy, thinking her boyfriend was joking around by hiding it, before "she realised it was inside her when she felt it 'buzzing.'"

Are you sitting down? You should sit down.

The couple then decided to try to get the missing toy out themselves, using such subtle weaponry as a "fork handle" and "barbecue prongs."

"He tried a kitchen fork handle, which we won't be using again, and said he could feel it at one point but that it was too far up—it was a goner."

When they finally went to the hospital, doctors were able to manually extract the vibrator and avoid major surgery.

Shared Phillips: "We weren't going to do anything about it because of the embarrassment—there's a big taboo about it—but we knew we needed help."

Thank you, Ms. Phillips. You lost a vibrator in your butt so we don't have to.

Airline begins weighing obese passengers for reasons that make sense in a disturbing way.

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Two Samoan businessmen have filed complaints with the US Transportation Department after Hawaiian Airlines forced them to step on a scale before boarding a flight, supposedly in the name of safety. The airline has stopped allowing passengers to preselect their seats, instead distributing heavier passengers around the cabin to ensure that the aircraft has proper weight distribution. You know, like cargo.

A Hawaiian Airlines jet taking off (but they would have you believe there's just one obese passenger in the back row).

The two businessmen who complained claim that the airline is practicing discrimination, not only based on weight, but also on nationality. Hawaiian's new rule only applies to flights into and out of Pago Pago, the capital of American Samoa. The CIA's World Factbook reports that American Samoa is the most obese country in the world, with at least 74.6% of the adult population falling into that category. That's a lot of seafood.

No judgment on the Samoans. This stuff looks awesome.

A Hawaiian Airlines spokeswoman told the Telegraph that this new rule was part of a six-month survey that has since concluded, and explained the corporation's rationale:

This action resulted from the recognition that over time our fuel burn on Pago Pago flights was consistently much higher than projected, indicating that our weight assumptions were inaccurate … The decision to assign seats at the airport was made because that is the most efficient way to manage weight distribution.

So was Hawaiian justified in adding another humiliation to flying? (The TSA is bad enough.) Was the decision truly based on safety, or is it just another way to penny-pinch on fuel? Avamua David Haleck​, one of the businessmen who complained, made an excellent point while speaking to Radio New Zealand:

And of course Hawaiian is saying that "yes it is a safety issue" but, you know, weight distribution … so have we been flying unsafe for all these years?

Let this be a lesson to every other business out there: if you're going to force people to weigh themselves in public, you'd better be able to tell them a damn good reason why.

Article 19

Watch teachers reveal the worst part about their jobs (other than your kid).

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Jimmy Kimmel had teachers send in confessionals about what really sucks about teaching, other than being extremely underpaid and undervalued despite being the backbone of society. Like Whitney Houston, Kimmel believes that children are our future: teach them well and let them lead the way, but firstly, don't laugh at their farts.

Many teachers had to confess in disguise, so prepare to hear from teddy bears and Ninja Turtles who deserve unlimited coffee.


People are doing yoga on horseback because yoga on the ground was just too easy.

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Have you ever been in a yoga class and thought, "Huh. I really wish my yoga mat had four legs, a mind of its own, and kept bending over to eat grass?" Well you're in luck! Apparently, horseback yoga is becoming a popular activity. You know, just in case regular, on-the-ground yoga has become too easy for you.

People have apparently been doing yoga on horseback in isolated areas and private practices for a while, but now it's becoming extremely popular at an eco-friendly resort in Spain called La Donaria, which houses 70 horses/yoga buddies on its 600 acres. Horseback yoga classes are even starting to pop up here in the US at places like Salamander Resort in Virginia.

Admittedly, these photos are pretty cool. Think I'll try to master headstand on the ground before trying it out on a living creature's back, though.

Mall of America tries to hold together fabric of society by staying closed on Thanksgiving.

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According to the Associated Press, the Mall of America has announced that for the first time since they opened in 2012, they will be closed on Thanksgiving day so employees can spend time with family.

The nation's largest mall, located in Bloomington, Minnesota, houses over 520 stores, a Nickelodeon themed amusement park, and a movie theatre— all of which will be closed for Turkey Day. This is a bold move in stark contrast with most other malls that seem to be opening earlier and earlier on Thanksgiving.

"We think Thanksgiving is a day for families and for people we care about," says Jill Renslow, the mall's senior vice president of marketing. "We want to give this day back."

Go ahead, eat yourself into a turkey coma.

Fourteen-thousand employees work at the mall or at one of its tenants (which includes Macy's, H&M and others). The Associated Press does note that some of the mall's tenants may choose to remain open on November 24th, and security will be still be on duty that day.

So if you are looking to physically assault some strangers in order get the best deals on Christmas gifts, you will have to wait until 5am on November 25th, when the mall reopens. Until then, enjoy eating copious amounts of food with your family. You'll burn off those calories on Black Friday.

Like kickboxing, but violent and scary.

Furious Christian mom demands her daughter's school stop teaching kids about Islam.

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A Tennessee mother named Michelle Edmisten is leading a one-woman campaign to have her daughter's history textbook thrown out of school for daring to teach American children that Islam exists. Edmisten spoke to the Sullivan County Board of Education on Monday night, demanding that the seventh grade social studies textbook by Pearson Education be immediately removed.

Michelle Edmisten, not happy.

The trouble started when Edmisten learned from her daughter that the class had studied Islam, and was even tested on the religion's basic tenets and history. Edmisten's daughter refused on principle to answer those questions (Why didn't I think of that back in school?), choosing instead to take an F on the test.

Today these kids are learning what the Quran is called. Tomorrow they'll be swearing to follow its teachings.

Edmisten told WJHL News:

I would like to see the Pearson book yanked from the school immediately. I would like to see parents, Christians, veterans, anyone that’s anyone, stand up for this fight. How can I, as a Christian, say that I have these values? And I want to instill these values in my daughter, but then say its okay go ahead and do it.

She makes an interesting point: how can you say you have Christian values when you know basic facts about another religion?

The Board of Education listened to her complaints, but explained that protocol must be followed to replace a textbook on the state curriculum. Board member Mark Ireson, however, supported Edmisten by making a motion at the end of the meeting to axe the book.

The entire state's social studies curriculum is currently under review, so Tennessee children may yet be spared from having to know a single tidbit about any non-Christian religions. Especially if President Trump deports all the Muslims. Then it will be really easy to pretend the rest of the world isn't real.

Here's the full report from WJHL:

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13 awesome X-ray pics that prove what amazing stuff can be crammed into our bodies.

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Growing up, we're always told that it's what's on the inside that counts, and X-Rays show just how cool we really look under the skin. Here are some of the dopest views of the human body that usually only Superman (and Dr. Spaceman) can see.

1. Main squeeze.

2. First peek at puppies (it's a pregnant dog!!!)

X-Ray of a pregnant dog.

3. An (extremely) broken hand.

X-ray of a broken hand

4. Pucker up.

5. Photobomb!

X-ray bomb

6. Ankle pins/subtle Nike product placement.

Broke my ankle a couple days ago and got a few pins put in. I think I should sell my x-ray to Nike.

7. Flip 'em the bird.

I hurt my middle finger and got an x-ray

8. Pre- and post-scoliosis surgery.

Before and After Xray

9. A special little snowflake.

My friends little boy swallowed a snowflake

10. A rogue toe.

A little toe pain...

11. This Buzz Lightyear fan had a friend in them.

x-ray showing a Buzz Lightyear action figure

12. Piercing.

So a friend of mine had to have a chest x-ray.

13. A modest proposal.

X Ray Proposal, Will you marry me..

If you only speak English, you missed these bilingual jokes hidden in your favorite movies.

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The relentless film-combers at Cracked have put together a video revealing seven bilingual jokes hidden in beloved movies. These jokes are so subtle, people who only speak English would never even notice they were there. I certainly didn't. But now I'll never watch The Princess Bride, The 40-Year-Old Virgin, or The Dark Knightthe same way again.

This video is the best argument yet for bilingual immersion education. Think of the jokes!


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Don't even think about messing with Michelle Obama's vegetable garden.

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First Lady Michelle Obama is ensuring that no screws up her prized vegetable garden even after she moves out of the White House in January.

Politico is reporting that an expansion on the White House Kitchen Garden would make it very hard for anyone to rip up Michelle's hard earned veggie patch:

On Wednesday afternoon, Obama unveiled a much bigger version of the garden, which uses concrete, stone and steel to make it a more permanent fixture on the South Lawn. The updates are seen not just as preserving Obama’s garden — recognized globally as a symbol of local food — but also as a way to dissuade, say, a President Donald Trump from scrapping it the way Ronald Reagan tore out Jimmy Carter's solar panels after he moved into the White House.

Michelle Obama established the White House Kitchen Garden in 2009 as a part of her Let's Move! campaign that encourages children to eat healthy and exercise. The 2,800-square-foot garden produces about 2,000 pounds of produce yearly and also includes the first-ever White House beehive and a composting system.

Because the garden's maintenance is covered by a 2.5 million dollar donation and not American tax dollars, ripping it up would be definitely be a political statement, especially now that it is effectively Trump-proofed. However, whoever occupies the White House gets the final say on what they would like to do with the garden.

Would President Trump keep the vegetable garden or replace it with an on-grounds KFC? If it were up to her, what would Melania Trump plant in the garden?

Crunchy.

Man's reaction to wife's surprise pregnancy announcement is the cutest thing on the internet.

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When Tania Perez-Guttierez learned she was pregnant, she didn't just want to text the news to her husband Ronald like a common shopping list. She wanted to savor the surprise, and she knew her dude's response would not disappoint. She set up a camera and waited, "hiding" a baby toy, positive pregnancy test, and ultrasound where she knew he would find them.

His reaction was so fantastic, Tania's sister Cristina felt compelled to tweet the video. That tweet is now demolishing the internet, because it's in equal parts moving, hilarious, and adorable. Check it out:

For the non-Spanish speakers out there, he keeps saying "No te creo," which means "I don't believe you!"

Vince Staples had a really empathetic response to the Christian mom who sobbed about his song.

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While many people mocked the Christian mom (including us, because wow) who made the now viral video of herself crying while reading the lyrics to "Norf Norf," ​ ​Vince Staples, the man whose song it is, responded wisely and empathetically. Way to make the rest of us look like cold-hearted jerks, guy.

Staples spoke to the Independent, who quoted him as saying the following (although, as you'll see, he disputes this version of his quote):

I don’t really have much to say about the video—I don’t think it’s funny at all. It’s not right to attack someone over their stance, their opinions, and their religion. I think that’s very immature. . . It’s just not right that’s she’s being attacked. It’s not okay. . . We already have a lot of issues between black and white relations in this country based on misunderstandings. In my eyes, she doesn’t look like a racist. She doesn’t look like a mean person. But it’s not very responsible for people to try to take that and jump, looking for some sort of commentary on these issues [in the community].

The song is about the north side of Long Beach, CA, where Staples is from and where kids sometimes get involved with gangs for lack of other options growing up.

This is a sample of the lyrics to the song (the rest can be read here).

I ain't never ran from nothin' but the police
From the city where the skinny carry strong heat
Norfside, Long Beach, Norfside, Long Beach

Hit the corner, make a dollar flip
And split the dollars wit' my mama children
Folks need Porsches, hoes need abortions
I just need y'all out of my business

The lyrics are intense, but they reflect a certain reality. Additionally, Staples has helped with the effort to remedy the situation he describes in his song by donating money to a program that offers Long Beach kids summer activities as well as employment opportunities.

Still, Staples doesn't blame the mom from the video for taking offense at his lyrics. Since he called out the Independent's reporter for misquoting him, here's his stance on via his own Twitter timeline:

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