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Article 6


Two years ago, Dr. Pimple Popper popped this 'double cyst.' Now it's redoubled.

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Dr. Pimple Popper is on a run of flashback pops recently. First she revisited her most famous dilated pore of Winer, scraping out the brown treasure that had accumulated in the two years since it first went viral. Now she's doing the same for another return patient, this one with a couple of recurrent epidermoid cysts, one on his chest and one on his back.

Dr. Lee took extra care to reduce the chances these cysts will come back a third time, using a punch excision on the first, and taking her time cutting through scar tissue on the second. While most popaholics will enjoy the first cyst, the second is only for the hardcore fans. It's pretty gross.

You watched both, didn't you?

Article 4

A guy threatened 'people offended by Christmas' and it blew up in his face.

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We all know that the "War on Christmas" isn't a real thing, right? Right-wing British guy Anish Patel isn't so sure, so he sent out this abrasive and incredibly un-timely tweet to threaten those who would try to deny him his holiday.

"If this country loses its identity the rest is meaningless."

Yeah, I'd say starting Christmas wishes in March is a little early, especially considering he used them to start an imaginary fight. No one is "offended by Christmas," dude. It's unclear why he thinks people are, but the UKIP in his Twitter handle, which stands for the UK Independence Party, UK's version of the alt-right, might be a clue. The alt-right has a history of pretending people have a problem with Christmas.

The whole thing is silly and aggressive, but that didn't keep Tim (@ruudboy) from trying to make the most of it.

"I'm offended by Christmas and I'm flying out of Luton on Thursday. Pick me up at about 10:15am?"

Inspired by the idea, tons of people starting Tweeting at Anish to get their rides to the airport, too.

"...i am v v v offended by xmas btw"

"I HATE Christmas and I'm off to Copenhagen on Thursday..."

"... i am very offended by christmas and I would hate it if I had to leave the UK via heathrow at 2pm on the 23rd"

They even started sharing Anish's airport rides.

Clearly everyone was having fun at Anish's expense, but it did trouble this guy who got legitimately worried that there were people out there who were offended by Christmas.

Fortunately, he was set straight.

Offensive though it was, Anish's threat/offer was rescinded after receiving so many ride requests.

Too bad, looks like there was nothing these Christmas haters wanted more than to spend the holiday far away from Anish.

Woman finds heartbreaking note a little boy wrote to his dead dad and now you're crying.

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This holiday season just keeps on giving and giving (us reasons to cry). A woman named Suzanne Womac Edwards has connected with the family of a little boy whose handwritten message to his dead dad landed in her yard. The message and accompanying photo, which she posted on Facebook, were attached to a helium balloon. Bring on the waterworks.

It reads:

Dad I wish you were here so we could have fun together. I wish you a Merry Christmas I hope you tell God to give me those presents I hope you are happy in heaven. If you are OK then tell me. I love you, Alexander.

If you're not crying already, he also attached this photo:

Edwards wrote in her post a message to Alexander, reassuring him that his dad is okay. "I am certain that your daddy didn't want to leave you or cause you to feel lonely or sad," she wrote. "But in Heaven, he is ok and he is happy."

The sweet post was widely shared, and eventually reached Alexander's mom, who reached out to Edwards. "She was very touched by my post, and did relay its message to her son," Edwards wrote in an update to the initial post. "She said he had a tear of joy and was so glad to know his dad is happy. She called the experience a miracle."

Here's the full post:

***Update!!! The mother of this boy has reached out to me. She was very touched by my post, and did relay it's message...

Posted by Suzanne Womac Edwards on Tuesday, December 6, 2016

I haven't been this emotional over a story about balloons since the opening scene from Up. Now go hug everyone you love!!!!

Don't you dare interrupt Shaq while he's emotionally lip syncing to Beyoncé.

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Shaquille O'Neil may be an NBA legend. But deep down, he is just like us: a passionate Beyoncé fan who just wants to lip sync to her new single in peace. In a new Instagram video, Shaq mouths the words to "All Night" with all of the raw emotion that lip syncing to Beyoncé stirs up in every single one of us. Yes, all of us. Don't fight it.

Also just like us, Shaq does not want to be interrupted during his moment with Bey. Just watch:

Dear Beyoncé this is my favorite song ever, thank you . This and HALO is my jam

A video posted by DR. SHAQUILLE O'NEAL Ed.D. (@shaq) on

"Dear Beyoncé this is my favorite song ever, thank you," he wrote in the caption, proving his impeccable taste in Beyoncé songs. "This and HALO is my jam."

Get you a man who can do BOTH.

Charity is auctioning off a coffee date with Ivanka Trump for a mere $50,000.

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Today in real news that feels like fake news: Ivanka Trump, who keeps using her dad's presidency to sell stuff, is now selling herself! In a platonic way, of course. And to raise money for her brother Eric's foundation to benefit St Jude’s Children Research Hospital. So while this is still very weird and Trump-like, at least it's weird and Trump-like for a good cause!

Auction charity website Charity Buzz is currently offering one "lucky" bidder and a guest the opportunity to go on a "coffee date" with the future First Daughter of the United States. The estimated value of the date is a whopping 50K, which seems like a lot to spend for 30-45 minutes with anyone, let alone Ivanka Trump. But with 11 days left to bid, the price has already gone up to $18,500. So it's possible they'll get the full amount. And as we all know by now, literally anything is possible when you're a Trump.

The date will take place at a Trump building in either DC or NYC, in 2017, after her dad is officially in office. The winning bidder will be heavily vetted to keep out potential creeps and foes, and the date will (of course) be accompanied by secret service​. Fun times!

As far as the winning bidder, any guesses as to who would want a date with Ivanka this badly and also be able to afford it? Hmmm....

Weekend


T.J. Miller got arrested for allegedly slapping his Uber driver in a fight about Donald Trump.

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This could really hurt his passenger rating.

T.J. Miller, known for playing the bombastic businessman Erlich Bachman on HBO's Silicon Valley and star of the upcoming rowdy holiday flick Office Christmas Party, posted $20,000 bail and will appear in court on January 9 after he allegedly slapped his Uber driver in the head early Friday morning. Sources in law enforcement told TMZ that "T.J.'s driver picked him up from the GQ Men of the Year party... and during the ride they got into an argument about President-elect Donald Trump." Miller, of course, "seemed intoxicated."

Miller had previously tried to burn a Trump necktie on Conan.

The driver was said to have performed a citizen's arrest, which has to be the first example of that actually working, with the LAPD later taking Miller into custody. The incident comes shortly before Miller is slated to host the Critics' Choice Awards on Sunday—he's been nominated twice for Silicon Valley, winning in 2015, and hosted the 21st annual ceremony in January of this year.

There's no question that Miller, who has never been afraid to make things weird, will touch on his arrest and battery charge when he takes the stage on Sunday night—organizers have confirmed that he'll still be hosting, so it's definitely required viewing now.

Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson and Jimmy Fallon pulled off the ultimate soldier homecoming surprise.

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Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's love for our men and women in uniform is no secret—in a few days, Spike TV will air his star-studded Rock the Troops special, filmed at Hawaii's Pearl Harbor. But he took the opportunity of his appearance Friday on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon to set up a once-in-a-lifetime surprise for a veteran working in the control room.

Explaining to Fallon that we should honor and thank U.S. service members whenever we can, Johnson then leads the host up into the audience, and finally out of the studio, to find Karina, a Tonight Show producer and veteran. "What is happening?" she cries. Johnson then reveals that he knows about her military experience, and that she met her husband, an Air Force sergeant named Todd, when they were deployed together—but that he's still working overseas. Of course, this is all just a very clever distraction so that Todd can sneak up behind his unsuspecting wife.

Even Jimmy was amazed at how well the whole thing went.

Here's to the couple's happy holidays—it's been a very long wait.

Haters react to SantaCon 2016, the horrible holiday bar crawl that refuses to die.

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Well folks, it's that day again. Hide your kids, hide your wife, and avoid the streets of New York City on Saturday, December 10 unless your idea of a good cardio workout is side-stepping puddles of vomit, because SantaCon 2016 is upon us.

If you're not familiar, SantaCon is an excuse for the worst types of people to dress up like Kris Kringle, thus ruining the magic of Christmas for all youth witnesses, all in the name of creating an excuse to day drink to excess. It's bro-filled and alcohol-fueled, and it's pretty dumb. And yet, year after year it returns, like a hacking cough that sets in without fail at the first frost. It happens in cities all across the country, and this year a lot of them are celebrating on December 10th.

At this point, it seems like most of the world/internet agrees that participating in SantaCon is a bad idea. It's kind of crazy that anyone is still doing it. But if we're going to have to endure another year of this gross display of holiday recklessness, at least it can be used for good Twitter material. Here, I give you the best haters' reactions to the atrocity that is SantaCon NYC 2016.

With everyone losing their mind over Russia's election-hacking, Trump tweets about 'The Apprentice.'

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You know, there really may be something to this theory that Donald Trump reacts to every big, bad news story by launching a tweetstorm on a completely unrelated topic. Because typically, when the U.S. intelligence community concludes that Russian hackers interfered in the presidential election to aid the candidate of their choice—and that candidate's team in turn slams the national security establishment as "the same people that said Saddam Hussein had weapons of mass destruction"—the candidate doesn't start talking reality TV.

And that's just what President-elect Trump did first thing Saturday morning, when #RussianHackers was among the top trends on Twitter. Rather than address the increasingly precarious legitimacy of his incoming, unprepared, crony-packed administration in light of these wild headlines, he tried to pivot to the matter of his continued executive role in the production of The Apprentice, the TV series he helped create and originally starred in.

Really? Because I could have sworn your own adviser Kellyanne Conway said you'd be running the show in your "spare time" and that even diehard supporters like Newt Gingrich described the announcement as "weird."

Fewer than three hours later, apparently annoyed that this tweet hadn't immediately snuffed out reports that he would play a part in the new Celebrity Apprentice series, hosted by Arnold Schwarzenegger—probably because MGM confirmed that he would—he tweeted in anger once again.

Seemingly the only nod to the dust-up with the FBI and the CIA today was a link to an article about bureaucratic waste in the Pentagon. A not-so-subtle message that he'll cut funding to agencies that don't subscribe to his bizarro reality? You be the judge!

Anyway, stay tuned, because eventually Trump is bound to tweet about something important. Like tonight's episode of Saturday Night Live.

Here are the absolute worst things you can buy at Kylie Jenner's new official web store.

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Just in time for the holidays, it's... The Official Kylie Jenner Shop! At long last, we've been saved from all that knock-off Kylie junk by Kylie herself, who is generously selling authentic Kylie items at an only moderately sadistic markup.

So, what kind of Kylie gear are you most excited to get your grubby, non-Kardashian hands on? Let's check out the worst of the worst.

The very first item on offer is, of course, a set of lace thong panties with KYLIE stamped all over them. Unfortunately, they're already sold out, so we may never find out what sweat shop they were manufactured in.

Next up, who could possibly resist a calendar of nothing but Kylie shots taken by the creepy godfather of harshly-lit sleaze himself, Terry Richardson!

There's no shortage of cool iPhone cases, but honestly, no other design can compare to the audacious laziness of slapping the words "KYLIE JENNER LIPS" on a hunk of molded plastic and charging $18 (plus shipping) for it.

Elsewhere, if you've still got $70 to burn, you can pick up one of these hoodies with a photo of Kylie on it, so that everyone knows you know who she is.

Did you know that Kylie is actually an '80s hair metal band? I didn't either, until I saw the font on this exercise outfit that's perfect for lying in bed watching Netflix till 3pm on a Saturday afternoon as you eat chips left out from last night.

Finally, no Kylie collection would be complete without a normcore denim dad hat bearing the hilariously botched frosted-lips emblem of her makeup empire.

https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/1564/3771/products/LIPS_DADHAT_DENIM-3_1024x1024.jpg?v=1481307417

From this point forward, human history will be divided into two periods: Before the official Kylie shop, and after. Welcome to the future, everyone.

Man crashed his car into a shoe store to get his hands on the new Space Jam Air Jordans.

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How far would you go to get a pair of very expensive sneakers? If you are me, the answer is not far at all. But sneakerheads are their own brand of crazy, as was reinforced on Wednesday, when a man in Louisville, Ky. drove his car into the exterior of a store to break in and steal the new Air Jordan sneakers being released this Saturday.

According to CBS Detroit, police believe that the destruction to the City Gear store was created by a car crashing into the back of the store, and that the robber, who has yet to be identified stole "lots" of the Air Jordans. Amongst the debris were some boxes of the Air Jordan XI sneakers that were left behind. No injuries were reported.

Air Jordans are already a much-coveted sneaker amongst people cool enough to follow sneaker releases, but this release was even more special as it was a celebration of the 20th anniversary of everyone's favorite 90's nostalgia-inducer: Space Jam. Was the robber just a Jordan collector trying to get ahead of the lines that are surely wrapping around blocks today? Or just a really big fan of Space Jam? Or maybe they're strictly a business person who has no other intention but to flip the sneakers on the black market for a pretty penny.

Well, sneakers may come and go, but at least there is one thing that will always stay the same: the Space Jam web site, which has not changed or been updated since 1996.

Article 4


Bristol Palin is pregnant with her third child, the first she'll have in wedlock.

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Bristol Palin, the 26-year-old daughter of former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin who famously launched an abstinence campaign after giving birth to her son, Tripp, as an unwed teen, is now expecting her third child. It will be her second baby with husband Dakota Meyer, following the birth of their daughter Grace last December. The couple had at one point split up but finally married—in a private ceremony—about 5 months after Grace was born.

"We are so excited to announce that our family is expanding!" the pair told Entertainment Tonight. "God has blessed us so much; we are thankful for His grace and new beginnings. A springtime baby in the Meyer home and we can't wait!" A spokesman for the family also confirmed the news.

date night 😘

A photo posted by Bristol Meyer (@bsmp2) on

So yeah, time to start betting on what this kid's name will be. Sure, "Grace" is pretty normal, but when it comes to boys, the Palins tend to think outside the box: Track, Trig, Tripp... my money's on, oh, I don't know—Trob.

One Direction's Louis Tomlinson performs an emotional tribute to his mother that will have you sobbing.

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Louis Tomlinson, returned to the X Factor stage where he got his start with One Direction on Saturday Night, this time to launch his solo career with a performance he dedicated to his late mother.

Johannah Deakin had passed away just days earlier, on Wednesday, of leukemia. According to People, the 24-year-old singer performed his new single, "Just Hold On," which was particularly poignant in the wake of her passing. The lyrics read as if Tomlinson is searching for the strength to keep moving forward: What do you do when a chapter ends? / Do you close the book and never read it again? / Where do you go when your story's done? But despite the lack of surety in his lyrics, the calm confidence he exuded during the performance was felt by the entire stadium.

The rest of One Direction was there to support Tomlinson during his performance, and around the world fans cheered him on using the hashtag #ProudOfLouis to show their love. Even Simon Cowell, the notoriously icy and difficult to impress judge of The X Factor and American Idol, was blown away and offered kind words of condolence. In the video below, you can hear Cowell's warm support of Tomlinson as well as some sobs from a 1D fan who pulls herself together to say that she needs to stop crying because her "face is covered in tears."

News of Deakin's death broke on Friday, and the family issued a statement, including information about her illness: "Earlier this year Johannah was diagnosed with a very aggressive form of leukemia that required immediate and continuous treatment." Tomlinson and Deakin, who was a mother of seven children, seemed to have a close and positive relationship.

My mother looking gorgeous before the Brits earlier this year . I love you and miss you so much !

A photo posted by Louis Tomlinson (@louist91) on

Whether you're a fan of One Direction or not, Tomlinson's performance is an impressive feat in the wake of a crushing loss, and the support he was shown as he launched his solo career is a reminder that it isn't all drama and egos in the Boy Band world.

Ryan Gosling has a deep emotional connection to his Roomba.

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To be honest, I don't know much about Ryan Gosling. I've never seen The Notebook (gasp!), and I just kind of assumed he was boring in the standard "nice guy" way that all those chiseled jaw Hollywood actors are (sorry hot white guys, but you are all the same to me). But boy, was I wrong. Ryan Gosling is totally weird.

On Friday, Ryan Gosling appeared on Ellen and talked extensively about his Roomba. How much can be said about a Roomba? A lot, when you have as deep a connection to it as Ryan Gosling. Ellen was asking Gosling about what he planned to get his family for Christmas this year, and his reply was, "I think I'm going to get a Roomba for our Roomba." Wow, let's unpack. Why would one Roomba not be enough? I will tell you why. It's because Gosling thinks his Roomba might be lonely.

"I feel bad for it because it works tirelessly, and at night I can hear it cleaning downstairs," he says. "If it hits your foot it acts ashamed. It's complicated. I wanted to get a Roomba for my Roomba this year, so it has company." Gosling suggests that he might "put them in a room and see what happens," and Ellen is quick to remind him that they'll probably bump into each other and then go in opposite directions. But Gosling is not convinced. "I don't know, we'll find out," he says. Is it insane for me to think that maybe he was high for this?

I really didn't think the ethical issue of humans feeling emotional connections with AI was going to be a topic that cropped up on The Ellen Degeneres Show (no shade to Ellen, AI just doesn't seem like her bag), but here we are. So, now I have to completely redefine my understanding of Ryan Gosling. I guess instead of the boring hunky type, he might be more of a weirdo injured poetic type, à la Garden State. You know, the type that truly believes they are deep. Does this make Eva Mendes his manic pixie dream girl?

I've learned a lot about Ryan Gosling today, but probably the most difficult truth I have had to swallow about him cropped up when I was reading his IMDB page. Because guess what: Ryan Gosling and I have the same birthday. It might all make sense now. Us Scorpios are freaks.

You can watch the bizarre interview here:

Teen Vogue published one of the hardest hitting post-election op-eds, and the internet is going wild.

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Teen Vogue is no longer the place you go to read about the season's best lip gloss, or cutest Snapchat filters, or whatever teens are into. Today, the outlet published an op-ed by writer Lauren Duca titled "Donald Trump is Gaslighting America" that drops one truth bomb after another, putting major news outlets to shame.

Here she outlines Trump's rise to power:

"Trump won the Presidency by gas light. His rise to power has awakened a force of bigotry by condoning and encouraging hatred, but also by normalizing deception. Civil rights are now on trial, though before we can fight to reassert the march toward equality, we must regain control of the truth. If that seems melodramatic, I would encourage you to dump a bucket of ice over your head while listening to “Duel of the Fates." Donald Trump is our President now; it’s time to wake up."

Then, she explains what the term "gaslighting" means and how it applies to Trump's behavior:

"To gas light is to psychologically manipulate a person to the point where they question their own sanity, and that’s precisely what Trump is doing to this country. He gained traction in the election by swearing off the lies of politicians, while constantly contradicting himself, often without bothering to conceal the conflicts within his own sound bites. He lied to us over and over again, then took all accusations of his falsehoods and spun them into evidence of bias. At the hands of Trump, facts have become interchangeable with opinions, blinding us into arguing amongst ourselves, as our very reality is called into question."

The piece pants a terrifying picture of what the next four years under Trump could look like. It's a harsh wake up call from what many people would consider an unexpected source. Duca's piece is a reminder that we should take the youth population more seriously than we do, especially considering that in this election, the millennial Electoral College map was almost entirely blue, meaning that the youth are currently our only source of hope for a future that isn't total garbage. Luckily, the internet has taken notice and they are energized by the Teen Vogue op-ed. Here are some of the best things they had to say about it:

Watch 'Dyke & Fats' make a glorious return to 'SNL' to save Christmas and yell at the patriarchy.

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Kate McKinnon and Aidy Bryant brought back their crime-fighting duo, Les Dykowitz and Chubbina Fatserelli, on Saturday's episode of SNL, and this time they're here to save Christmas.

The original Dyke & Fats sketch aired in 2014, and took the form of a TV trailer for a 1980's police procedural that takes place in Chicago. McKinnon and Bryant play the crime fighting duo who star in the fictional show, which is called Dyke & Fats. The newest video is an updated trailer for a Christmas special of the show, where Dyke & Fats are now stopping bad guys using wreath lassos, but are still dealing with the same workplace sexism they were two years ago.

What's beautiful about the Dyke & Fats sketches, is that they allow McKinnon and Bryant to proudly take on the terms that have probably been used against them in their real lives, as a form of bullying. In the sketches, they serve as a way to mock the very two-dimensional female characters that television shows frequently create for women. It's painfully obvious that these names are familiar, uninteresting reductions of these women into stereotypes. In the latest trailer for "Dyke & Fats Save Christmas," we see Dyke's (McKinnon) eyes bulge out of her head when she opens a Christmas present that turns out to be a beautiful lady. Fats (Bryant) gift is an attractive man holding a sandwich, and of course Fats looks right past the man and goes wild for the sandwich he is holding. We groan to see this patronizing and uncomplex portrayal.

The flat characters make the viewer ask questions about the world in which this show was created: Would the actors who were playing Dyke & Fats in this 80's television show felt demeaned by the roles they were playing? Or were they just happy to have a leading role as a woman? The sketch is able to subtlely point out how far we've come since this type of show was the bread and butter of network programming, while also serving as a reminder that there's still a long way to go in the portrayal of complex women on television.

The best part of the sketch is the turn at the very end, when the slapstick fighting montage is over and we get a window into who these women are. After being congratulated on saving Christmas, the Chief says thank you and palpably pauses before saying their name. He decides to call them by their full names, instead of their nicknames (which is what got them in trouble in the 2014 sketch, when they yelled at the Chief that only they could call each other Dyke and Fats). "Thanks, Officer Dykowitz and Fatserelli," he says. And the duo thanks him for respecting them and using their full names. "Of course I respect you, you're two damn fine cops, for broads," he replies. And that's when the two officers rightfully go off on him, asking him, "we're back to the women thing? We're back to that?"

Progress is never a straight line forward, and in the wake of Clinton's loss in the election, a lot of people have been realizing we are indeed "back to the women thing" that many of us assumed we had moved past as a country. Dyke & Fats returned to SNL in a time of need, when we needed to be reminded that the struggle for women to find equality in the workplace and be accurately represented on TV and film is an ongoing one, that there's lots of work to do. The sketch makes you think about how far we've come as a society,while also feeling chillingly not far off from things we see today.

Watch the video and witness the punching up here:

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