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Donald Trump reportedly called the National Park Service to complain about a tweet.

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While millions of people protested in the massive Women's Marches on the Saturday following his inauguration, President Donald Trump spent some time on the phone, with the director of the National Park Service, talking Twitter.

According to the Washington Post, CNN, and the New York Times, Trump spoke to Michael T. Reynolds, demanding to know why his organization had retweeted an unflattering photo comparing the crowd at his swearing in with that of Obama's in 2009.

The retweet had led to an "urgent directive to Interior employees" to stop tweeting.

But the call wasn't purely about the retweet. Trump also reportedly ordered Reynolds to send him "further photographic evidence," according to the Times, "of his inaugural crowd" size.

Apparently, he was hoping for photos to prove what press secretary Sean Spicer would later call"the largest audience ever to witness an inauguration, period."

The Postreports that although "taken aback" by the request, Reynolds apparently did manage to produce "some additional aerial photographs." However, the photos did nothing to prove Trump's claims "that the crowd size was upward of 1 million."

CNN writes that White House deputy press secretary Sarah Huckabee confirmed the call, and characterized it as the leader of the free world taking swift, decisive action.

"If he sees an issue, he is going to take action and do something to fix it."


The top 39 tweets of the week, as picked by someone who deeply enjoys tweets.

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Headlines this week were about newly inaugurated President Donald Trump, the Women's March, and Mary Tyler Moore passing. Unwind with jokes about eagles, losing weight, Waldo, and more, in the top 39 tweets of the week!

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Watching Khal Drogo throw axes with Jimmy Kimmel will make you hot and sweaty.

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Jason Momoa, who is best known for playing Khal Drogo onGame of Thrones, joined Jimmy Kimmel on Thursday to promote his new show, talk TV, and put on an impressive display of manliness by throwing axes at a target while holding a beer on live television. Momoa (also known as "pure masculinity on a pair of hairy, strong legs") even forged the axes with his own two hands. Has one single person ever had so much testosterone?

Jason Momoa currently plays Declan Harp on the television show Frontier, or as he describes his character: "Me wrapped in fur killing a bunch of English people." Yep, sounds about right. Momoa is also set to play Aquaman in the new Justice League movie, and he might be the only man on Earth who can actually manage to make Aquaman seem cool.

We can only hope that producers will have the sense to have him throw swordfish at target or something.

Wendy Williams came for Paris Jackson over 'black' comments but Michael Jackson's daughter is not having it.

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Paris Jackson, daughter of the legendary Michael "King of Pop" Jackson (perhaps you've heard of him), is on the ​​​​​​cover of the February issue of Rolling Stone, which includes an intimate and revealing interview with the 18-year-old. In the interview, among other things, Jackson says she considers herself black, because her father was black.

I consider myself black. [My dad] would look me in the eyes and he’d point his finger at me and he’d be like, ‘You’re black. Be proud of your roots.’ And I’d be like, ‘OK, he’s my dad, why would he lie to me?’ So I just believe what he told me. ‘Cause, to my knowledge, he’s never lied to me.

Well, this did not sit right with talk show host Wendy Williams, who on Thursday gave her thoughts on the matter, which can basically be summed up by saying: A. Paris Jackson hasn't done enough on her own yet to warrant her own Rolling Stone cover and B. black is not what you feel you are, but what the cops see when they pull you over.

Okay, that's some heavy paraphrasing of Williams' words; here's a transcript of her statements (starting at the 3:50 mark in the video above).

But can we talk? I mean, real talk? She has not made her mark on her own. You cannot be on the cover of one of the most prestigious entertainment and influential magazines in the world and just be "the daughter of" and tell your story inside. Sorry, you all. She hasn't made any music that we know of, she's done the modeling, I showed you the beautiful pictures, but she's not on her way, we haven't seen her in a Sassoon ad or anything.

By the way, she considers herself black, period. She says she's not going to address this again, she was raised black, her father would constantly remind her of what it is to be black and proud, and so don't ask her again. Well, you know what? I've got a lot of slick talk in my head, but…you know, at the end of the day, I think it's terrific, 'cause this is the first time in about a year that a black woman has been, then, on the cover of Rolling Stone magazine.

You guys are clapping so seriously, I was mostly joking with that. I mean, I get that she considers herself black and everything, but I'm just talking about the visual, 'cause, you know, black is not what you call yourself, it's what the cops see you when they got steel to your neck on the turnpike, okay? It's what they see. But that's cute, and good for her, the last black woman on the cover of the magazine happened to have been Nicki Minaj back in last January of 2015, so now it's Paris. Good for you, Paris.

http://i.giphy.com/Nk6TfBBuzrnyg.gif

Unsurprisingly, this, in turn, did not sit right with Paris Jackson, who fired back at Wendy Williams via a series of tweets.

Well, that answers that, then.

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Meet Toni Lahren, the perfect Tomi Lahren parody for liberal snowflakes.

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You're nobody until somebody parodies you, and Tomi Lahren has officially "made it."

Meet Toni Lahren, the ultimate, accurate ranter that delivers some FINAL Final Thoughts.

Toni takes on Tomi's (say that ten times fast) proud, "provocateur" (French for "racist") persona by turning it up to the upteenth degree.

Tomi's cover photo.
Toni's cover photo.

In a rant about feminism that is eerily close to the real thing, Toni insists, "I choose to get less money for the same work. If I fought for the same pay as my male counterparts, that would make me a feminist, who I'm paid to denounce in the first place."

Toni doesn't have time for snowflake nonsense like health codes: "I only drink expired milk. The nanny state says that I'm in 'danger' and it becomes 'poisonous' but I literally lick the sidewalk on my way to work because I am not a victim."

She's even got the near-Trumpian finger wags down.

The team behind Toni deserve a trophy, and not just for participation.

Weather girl totally loses it on-air when confronted about her Adam Driver crush.

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The Super Bowl is barely a week away, and advertisers are already starting to tease their high-profile commercials. Snickers is very excited about its ad featuring Star Wars: The Force Awakens star Adam Driver, and so is WCCB Charlotte meteorologist Kaitlin Cody. When Driver's commercial was referenced during a segment on Cody's show News Rising, she couldn't resist gushing over "one of the funniest people on Earth." And when her co-anchors pressed her on it, she devolved into a giggle fit that totally disrupted her weather report.

Because Cody was unable to deliver the forecast, 500 Charlotteans died in weather-related accidents.*

*not really

GQ made a hilarious fashion video where they dress Donald Trump like a normal human being.

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In case you haven't watched the news or scrolled through the internet in the last one minute, here's a reminder of all Donald Trump's fashion faux pas.

His look is the least important problem concerning Donald Trump right now, but it's the only one GQ knew how to fix. So, their fashion experts (and impeccable video editors) got to work on the makeover, giving Trump some better-fitting pants and a haircut that looks significantly more human.

By the end, he's barely recognizable. Wait that's not true. But there's progress. Not actual progress, but fashion progress. And a reduction of orange.

Again, the video makes it clear that Trump's style is the least of his problems. Well actually that's not true. Paul Ryan is the least of his problems. But people appreciated the coda at the end of GQ's piece, which clarified that a nicer suit does not equal an endorsement.

This has to be the world's worst pregnancy test advertisement.

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The internet is going berserk over this Dutch pregnancy test ad that has one big, round, protruding problem.

Can you spot it?

Yeah, usually women take pregnancy tests before they are visibly very pregnant, but thecouple looks shocked at the resultsnone the less. What did they think happened, she swalloweda watermelon seed?

Of course, Twitter has some theories as to why the couple looks so surprised.

Adweekreached out to Chris Sant, one one of the designers behind the ad, in an attempt to better understand the perplexing image. "Since Predictor is 99.9 percent accurate, you'd rather depend on the test than your belly," Sant told the publication. Okay, so Sant is basically saying to trust the pee stick over what your own body is telling you. This is what we get when men are put in charge of designing pregnancy test ads.

Adding to the hilarity of the image is the company's slogan: "When you need to know." YEAH, we are pretttttty sure she knows. Maybe this ad should be used to argue why schools need better sex education programs instead of being an ad for a pregnancy test.


Kristen Bell shares #tbt pic that proves her wedding to Dax Shepard was as cute as you imagined.

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Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard are #relationshipgoals all the way. They are a good-looking, super funny couple who really seem to enjoy each other, even after having two kids. So when Kristen Bell shared a #ThrowbackThursday (#tbt) picture of their wedding on Instagram, it was no surprise that it was adorable.

#tbt to when I cried at our wedding and @daxshepard thought it was really funny.

A photo posted by kristen bell (@kristenanniebell) on

She captioned the photo, "#tbt to when I cried at our wedding and Dax Shepard thought it was really funny."

Awww, Kristen Bell crying is one of the best parts about this couple! Like that time Dax Shepard arranged for her to meet a sloth as a birthday gift and she got so excited and overwhelmed that she burst into tears. Classic.

Woman who was dumped on vacation gets 'the best revenge' on boyfriend. Topless revenge.

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This is 25-year-old Sian Ryan.

Sian was dumped by her boyfriend of 18 months in the middle of their romantic vacation. (Who does that?) Sian was pretty upset, but instead of moping around and feeling sorry for herself, she decided to heed the advice of Khloe Kardashian, who once said that "looking good is always the best revenge."

According to Daily Mail, Sian couldn't sleep after her breakup, so she joined a nearby 24-hour gym so she could work out in the middle of the night. At the time she started working out, Sian weighed around 260 lbs. She started documenting her fitness journey on her Instagram account. Since beginning her weight loss journey, Sian has dropped 7 stone, which is about 98 lbs.

She posted a side-by-side photo comparing where she started her fitness journey to where she is now.

Hell yeah, girl!

Sian told Daily Mail that she used to have a very unhealthy lifestyle. She said she used to be "lazy."

"I would party all the time and eat junk," she said. "I'd drink litres and litres of sugary, full-fat cola and loved takeaway pizzas."

Her boyfriend, she realized after the fact, was enabling that behavior. "We had similar lifestyles," Sian said of her ex.

"I was so sad when we broke up," she continued. "But, actually, it was the best thing that could've happened to me."

Here's Sian today, looking happy and healthy AF.

She's a rockstar.

A friendly reminder that Donald Trump once starred in a sexually charged Pizza Hut commercial.

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Before Donald Trump was the President of the United States, he was a lot of other things. A real estate mogul. A reality TV star. A steak salesman. A Howard Stern guest. A surefire punchline for any joke involving a bad comb-over. Of all his previous titles, though, the best one may have just surfaced: Donald Trump, star of a sexually charged 1995 Pizza Hut commercial for stuffed-crust pizza.

Donald and his first ex-wife Ivana co-star in the ad, which was shot four years after their highly-publicized, messy divorce. In the commercial, the couple seem to debate having a sordid fling, but turns out they're actually talking about ... wait for it ... eating stuffed crust pizza backwards.

Behold:

You're all hot and bothered now, aren't you?

The ad was known behind the scenes as the "Pizza Slut" commercial, for obvious reasons, and thanks to renewed interest (i.e. the star being elected president of the United States), some autographed storyboards from the shoot are being sold as historic memorabilia.

"Pizza Slut" storyboards would be a wonderful addition to any patriotic American's home decor, don't you think?

One more tidbit from the Pizza Hut commercial shoot: according to Page Six, the storyboard seller who worked on the shoot said Donald Trump "was pleasant to work with, but you can see that he has to be the one in control."

Sounds about right.

Kim Kardashian’s latest piercings seem very impractical.

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Kim Kardashian, ever the visionary and entrepreneur, debuted a new style on Snapchat. These pierced nails are perfect for anyone who doesn't use their fingers, wear wool sweaters, shake hands, or come into contact with anything that might get stuck on or punctured by the hoops.

"Khloe would be so proud of me right now," she says. Khloe is probably reclining on a velvet couch somewhere, looking at the video, beaming.

Because of physics, these are almost certainly fake. Hopefully Kardashian takes off the pierced nails before having to come into contact with her kids. It seems uncomfortable to be held by metal.

family

A photo posted by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

Fans of Dr. Pimple Popper will love this satisfyingly gooey black head removal video.

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Sure, dermatologist extraordinaire Dr. Pimple Popper (real name Dr. Sandra Lee) might be the reigning queen of popping videos, but that doesn't mean there aren't other major players in the game. This video, posted to YouTube by user KeanaTankentai gives you a close up (very close up) view of how pore strips work to remove oil and blackheads.

Watch and enjoy all the slo-mo, gooey goodness.

I've used pore strips before with less than stellar results, but those strips didn't look anything like this industrial-strength bad boy here. That thing looks like it could pick up bowling balls.

This video is the second part of a two-parter; you can check out part one on YouTube as well.

Someone realized there's an awesome trick hidden in the titles of the new 'Star Wars' movies.

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Spoiler alert: This post contains spoilers from Star Wars: The Force Awakens. If you haven't seen it yet, what's wrong with you?

Star Wars fever has once again gripped the public, raising body temperatures to dangerous heights and threatening to wipe out an entire generation of frail nerds. The reason? On January 23, Disney finally released the title of the next installment—Star Wars: The Last Jedi. As soon as it was announced, this title sparked a wave of speculation among the fans. Who is the last jedi? Luke? Rey? CHEWIE?

We won't know for sure until the movie comes out in December. But some eagle-eyed fans have noticed a pattern in the titles of the first two movies in the new trilogy that may provide a clue.

Put back-to-back, the titles form a sentence. The Force Awakens The Last Jedi. Could this be a coincidence? Knowing how much thought (and money) Disney is putting into the franchise, that seems unlikely. And the people of Twitter agree.

And what's more, this sentence isn't necessarily finished. The as-yet unannounced title of Episode IX could provide another clause.

Immediately, the speculation machine became fully operational.

Disney has proven once again that they're masters of torturing us with anticipation. We already couldn't wait until December 15; now we can't wait until May 23, 2019. They're manipulating us like Palpatine, and we're powerless to resist.

The Dark Side is strong with them. And with us. Here's the last scene from The Force Awakens, just to make you suffer even more:

Local Fox anchor compliments Kellyanne Conway's BS-ing skills, promptly gets suspended.

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As someone who coined the term "alternative facts" to describe the Trump administration's incorrect claims about the crowd size at the inauguration, you'd think Kellyanne Conway would take great pride in her bullshitting ability. After all, this is a woman who knows how to spin a story and can single-handedly bring 1984 back to bestseller lists with her artful re-naming of blatant lies. Check out the proud moment below to see her in her element:

Now THAT is some great bullshitting.

But when Mike Jerrick, co-host of the Fox 29 morning show "Good Day Philadelphia," dared to point out that Kellyanne Conway is "good at bullshit" during a live interview, things didn't end well for him. You can see the moment at 1:23 below, although the whole video is worth watching to see Mike get more and more exasperated with the current political dialogue..

Jerrick quickly apologized for his slip-up, clarifying that he meant to say "BS" instead of "bullshit." Are you living for this savagery?

Unfortunately the network heads weren't wild about Jerrick swearing on air and suspended him for an undisclosed amount of time. A source close to the show says the suspension wasn't politically motivated, but due to the curse word Mike uttered on air, saying, "You can’t be vulgar on TV.”

But isn't a bad word just an alternative good word, though?


Melania Trump is hiring a whole staff just to go after her online haters.

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Melania Trump has said her primary aim as first lady will be to tackle cyber-bullying, and it looks like she is about to make good on that claim, kind of, considering she plans to hire a whole team of staffers to combat all the bullying lobbed against herself.

A message to the haters:

As Washington insiders tell the Daily Mail, Melania Trump is "close to finalizing a team to manage the attacks against her and her ten-year-old son Barron."

This is clearly a response to Chelsea Handler's vow to never interview Melania because, "she can barely speak English."

10-year-old Barron has also been receiving online bullying, most notably bySaturday Night Live writer Katie Rich who tweeted that Barron would become the nation’s “first ­homeschool shooter.” Even former first kid Chelsea Clinton felt bound to stick up for him.

According to Page Six, former Vogue staffer and Met Gala organizer, Stephanie Winston Wolkoff, has been tapped as Melania's chief strategist, who will handle hiring the rest of Melania's don't-bully-me team.

How a round-the-clock crew of people hired to battle Melania and Barron's haters will help non-first-family victims of bullying isn't exactly clear. Perhaps, much like the President's plan to help the wealthiest Americans first, Melania believes her cyber-bullying defense will have a trickle-down effect.

I used to be able to pull all-nighters but now I can barely pull all-dayers.

Rob and Dream Kardashian are practically twins in this adorable Instagram photo.

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Rob Kardashian makes no bones about the fact that before his fiancéeBlac Chyna gave birth to their baby, he really, reallywanted a boy. But in a recent Instagram caption, he revealed how happy he was that the baby was a girl, and how he loves her and wouldn't change a thing. And baby Dream being a girl doesn't keep her from looking almost exactly like her daddy, as you can see from this present/throwback side-by-side Instagram he posted of Dream and himself as a wee tot.

😄😄

A photo posted by ROBERT KARDASHIAN (@robkardashian) on

The caption for this one is simple: just two smiley face emojis, showing that he knows how nearly identical they look (I'm guessing—I don't actually speak fluent emoji).

She really is Daddy's Little Girl.

My baby

A photo posted by ROBERT KARDASHIAN (@robkardashian) on

People tried smoking weed with their parents and bonded like never before.

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Parents are often characterized as the people who comb their kid's bedrooms hunting for dime bags of marijuana and weed paraphernalia, but this new video by WatchCut Video shows that not every parent is against smoking weed. In fact, some may even join you if you provide herb and the munchies.

These parents seemed a bit awkward handling the bongs and joints at first, but after copious amounts of coughing, they totally got into it. Although drugs are often a point of contention for many parents and their kids, it would seem that smoking brought these families closer together. Sounds like more fun than family game night and taco Tuesday combined (as long as you don't puke like that one guy did).

Gwyneth Paltrow's latest 'Goop' product is a gold-plated ode to the butt.

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Ladies and gentlemen, she's at it again. Anyone who knows me knows how much I love Gwyneth Paltrow's blog, Goop, and all the hilarious things it tells us we should buy. (Vagina eggs, anyone?) The Goop shop's latest product, available just in time for Valentines Day, is a gold-plated butt necklace.

Goop describes this necklace as "the definition of cheeky."

The necklace, which Goop is calling "Le Derriére Dorée" can be yours for a mere $370 dollars. And, remarkably, it's almost sold out.

Are butts not your thing? Not to worry! Goop also has a gold plated boob necklace available. The "Rubies Boobies Doré" will cost you $507. (The price difference is probably thanks to the boob necklace's ruby nipples.)

Well, I am sufficiently delighted. WHAT WILL GWYNETH PALTROW THINK OF NEXT?! I can't wait to find out.

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