Are we over face swaps yet or have they gone the way Harambe memes and Pokemon Go? You know, still around but kind of old and annoying and just begging to become forever irrelevant. Anyway, if face swaps aren't over yet, you'll wish they were after seeing what Reddit human Kannzann called "the most horrific face swap I've ever encountered."
It looks like someone tried to swap their toddler's face with Thomas the Tank Engine's, and whatever you're expecting it's 10 times scarier.
Awful, but the face swap worked perfectly. Creepy is the gold standard when you're going face for face.
As the post got popular among fear mongers on Reddit, commenters started sharing more of their favorite demon face swaps. Click away if you don't want bad dreams forever.
Many people are unhappy that Donald Trump is in the White House, but one model is extremely grateful. Especially for the new first lady.
The Miami Herald reports that local model Mira Tzur is cashing in on her uncanny resemblance to Melania Trump. She's being paid thousands of dollars to play the first lady.
A post shared by JewlaniaTrump - By Mira Tzur. (@jewlaniatrump) on
According to The Miami Herald, Mira Tzur makes $3,000 (plus expenses) per appearance. Tzur says she and Donald Trump impersonator John Di Domenico have been hired to play the first couple eight times so far.
A post shared by JewlaniaTrump - By Mira Tzur. (@jewlaniatrump) on
The Israeli-born Tzur told The Miami Herald that she didn't realize she looked like the first lady until a photographer dressed her up as Melania Trump. She couldn't deny the uncanny resemblance.
James Corden, Nick Kroll, and Jordan Peele are comedy dynamos individually, but together, they are Thr33way. While boy bands dominated hearts and bedroom walls in the 90s, their music was missing one important thing: sex. Well, explicit mentions of sex.
Enter Thr33way, who live up to their names with songs such as "Quit Playing Games With My Dick," "Bye Bye Bisexual," and "MMMBoobs" (it's a song about boobs). Can you handle the heat?
“We took existing boy band songs, cut through all the innuendo, and just got to the heart of what those songs are really about: hardcore sex,” Kroll explains.
If they were indeed a real band, I'd be the first in line to see them open for Santana.
A reader sends us these screenshots from a Facebook post by an elementary school PTA that quickly turned into yet another bloody battleground for the Grammar Wars. It started when the Parent Teacher Association of Dora L Small Elementary in Portland Maine posted this cute meme to thank parents who helped them out in their movie night fundraiser.
You may have noticed the typo in that meme. It may even have driven you into a pedantic rage. That's what it did to one parent, who felt the need to leave a nasty comment. But the PTA had one hell of a response ready.
Any normal parent would have dropped the issue at this point, but not our professor. She decided to defend her nitpicking by comparing the proofreading standards of a PTA Facebook page to a life-saving public utility.
The PTA's second response was decidedly less cute. Understandably, they were getting mad.
Can you believe this person still won't drop it? Also, this is not a "standard for the kids." This is a Facebook page for the parents, who presumably can handle the occasional typo without their children becoming less literate as a result. This whole story is a perfect lesson is why you should choose your battles.
The reader who submitted it to us explained:
She was immediately banned from our PTA Facebook page after her last comment. I can only hope she's embarrassed, but something tells me she's not.
The 2017 Oscars are on Sunday and what better way to spice up your viewing party than getting wasted? So line up those shot glasses, coat your stomach with chips and dip and be prepared to be too hung over to show up to work on Monday, because if this drinking game doesn't get you drunk, you are some kind of superhuman.
1) Whenever an actor uses their speech to make a political statement, take a shot.
2) Take a shot for every ugly dress you see.
3) Take a shot for each kid from Stranger Things that pops up randomly.
4) When Jennifer Lawrence says something ~so quirky~ on the red carpet, take a shot.
5) Whenever the Jimmy Kimmel makes a joke that doesn't land, chug through the cringey-ness.
6) Every time a movie you didn't get around to seeing wins, drink.
7) Whenever the camera pans to an actor who is not paying attention, take two shots.
8) Take a shot for every celebrity left out of the "In Memoriam" slideshow.
9) Any time an actor tells their kids to go to bed in their speech, take a shot while rolling your eyes.
10) Whenever Meryl Streep looks humble and slightly annoyed from an accolade, take a shot for every Oscar she's won.
11) If someone says "Hidden Fences," just drown yourself in alcohol.
So what's the deal? Did pop music's golden boy pee himself in public or what???
If any celeb was going to strut around with a piss spot on the front of their sweatpants with the swag of a British king, it would be Justin Bieber. But the pop star took to Twitter this morning to dispel the pee rumors, with a very detailed explanation:
Someone got me flowers and I was driving, made a turn, and the water spilled on my dick area...Didn't bother me if it made ya laugh nice!
"Someone got me flowers and I was driving, made a turn, and the water spilled on my dick area," he wrote. "Didn't bother me if it made ya laugh nice!"
Ohhhh the ol' "water spilled on my dick area" excuse! I see you, Biebs.
I mean, I get it, Justin Bieber. Your publicist told you to tell us you spilled water on your pants (the "dick area" detail was clearly all you though, props!). That's legit and I understand why you would take that advice and tell us it's water even though you totally peed yourself because you're Justin Bieber and you DGAF.
But honestly, it was pee, right? Come on, please. Let us have this. It's all we have.
Well, this wasn't the smartest idea. A Queensland, Australia, plumber took a picture of a dildo he saw in a client's bathroom, and shared it with a friend, according to news.com.au. Then that friend posted the dildo picture to a Facebook group called Blokes Advice. He included his plumber friend's text, "as a plumber this is my greatest fear."
Really? A dildo? Greatest fear? Hmm. Sex toys are nothing to be scared of, or ashamed of. Sure, you maybe don't want a vibrator as the centerpiece at Thanksgiving dinner, but they're fine, even good, to own.
Anyhow, someone in that Facebook group, in turn, posted it to another Facebook group called Bad Girls Advice. Well, wouldn't you know it, the client was actually a member of that second Facebook group. OOPS. Unsurprisingly, she wasn't particularly stoked to find her precious as the subject of a Facebook post.
When the owner of the dildo complained to the plumbing company, the plumber who took the picture was fired.
However, it doesn't seem like there was too much animosity between the plumber and his boss, since his boss did say he could use him as a reference.
Would he do it again, if he had it do over?
Well, in a follow-up comment, the plumber wrote,
I had to pull it down as I was the foreman on the site and my boss had no other choice but to let me go it was my fault not his
Would I do it again probably not, but at the time I couldn't dog the boys, to a long weekend I guess
Give me time to have a … haaaaaard think about what I have done.
Ah, a dick pun. Well, we'd expect no less (or more) from this fellow.
Hollywood’s biggest night is the Super Bowl for non-sporty folk, an opportunity to get drunk on a Sunday and collectively scream at the TV. This year, the Academy nominated nine movies for Best Picture, humbly requesting that you spend approximately 27 hours consuming the content. We realize you may happen to have a life outside of the movie theater, so we at Someecards are here to help with cheat sheets for the five Best Picture nominees you need to know about to fake your way through an Oscars watch-party.
In the year’s most obvious and pertinent metaphor, aliens come to earth and the world needs to work together to welcome and understand them. Why are they here? What are their intentions? Could we trust them if they don’t look like us or speak the same language? Subtle.
If the aliens-as-immigrants metaphor wasn't clear enough, averting disaster depends on collaboration with the Chinese. You hear that, Donald Trump?
Amy Adams plays Louise Banks, a linguist tasked with decoding the alien's language, which takes its form in some inky discharge.
While the film opens with Louise mourning the loss of her daughter, who dies of cancer, it turns out that she isn’t dead. Why? Because her daughter doesn’t exist yet.
Louise's flashbacks were actually flashforwards, and understanding the alien's language grants the ability to mentally travel to time and have visions. It's so raven.
(The vision stuff makes sense in the movie, I swear.)
Smart Things to Say About Arrival:
“Amy Adams was ROBBED for a nomination. ROBBED! She is the female Leonardo DiCaprio in terms of Oscars. Hopefully she doesn't have to wait to get mauled by a bear to win."
"Science fiction can be serious, Mom. This alien stuff is important."
"The alien's ship was but a Trojan horse. This movie isn't about aliens, it's about humanity."
"Hawkeye and Lois Lane's team-up was a lot sadder than I expected."
"For a film about language, I can hardly find the words."
“The score by Johann Johannsen truly seeped into my bones.”
"I'd rather comment in Heptapodese."
“Jeremy Renner was in this movie? I saw it, he’s just so easily forgettable.”
You know when you try to do something nice for someone and it totally backfires? This video of a group of students attempting to surprise their teacher on his birthday encapsulates that feeling perfectly.
The video shows a group of students who apparently came up with the brilliant idea to throw their teacher a "surprise party." As they barge into his classroom, singing it's apparent that he's not psyched about the invasion.
The end of the video is where it gets really bizarre. Watch for yourself.
Before we get too excited about this spectacularly awkward video, someone in the comments pointed out that this whole she-bang was supposedly a prank.
"Probably going to get buried but as awesome as this is, he's an awesome teacher and this is actually just a prank," Reddit user Starfleeter wrote. He attached this screengrab of an exchange on Facebook, supposedly between the teacher in the video and another user.
Ah, foiled again! Though it may actually be a prank, this insanely awkward video will always be real in our hearts.
Hollywood’s biggest night is the Super Bowl for non-sporty folk, an opportunity to get drunk on a Sunday and collectively scream at the TV. This year, the Academy nominated nine movies for Best Picture, humbly requesting that you spend approximately 27 hours consuming the content. We realize you may happen to have a life outside of the movie theater, so we at Someecards are here to help with cheat sheets for the five Best Picture nominees you need to know about to fake your way through an Oscars watch-party.
If you missed the 2010 Broadway revival of August Wilson’s Pulitzer Prize-winning play Fences starring Denzel Washington and Viola Davis, great news! There is now a film version of August Wilson's Pulitzer Prize-winning play Fences starring Denzel Washington and Viola Davis.
Washington directed the film himself, offering a front row seat to the tears and the snot.
Washington also plays Troy Maxson, a sanitation worker in 1950's-era Pittsburgh. Troy was once a promising baseball player, but was too old to play once the major leagues started admitting black athletes, which really isn't fair. He never truly overcomes the bitterness, as he resents his son for possibly having a future in football, and he cheats on his wife.
There's a literal fence around the Maxsons' Pittsburgh backyard, and you know, metaphorical ones around peoples' hearts. Faced with stress and injustice, people put up their de-Fences.
Viola Davis, as Rose Maxson, is a living, breathing Oscar moment, whose brilliance shines through as her monologues can turn into an acceptance speech at any moment.
He cheats. They cry. We cry. He dies. We die (not in the movie, that comes later on).
Smart Things to Say About Fences:
“It was obvious that Fences was written for the theater, so it’s impossible to praise it on simply its cinematic merits.”
“A remarkable tribute to the craft of acting. That’s what it is—a CRAFT.”
“For all the talk of walls these days, we ought to be talking about Fences.”
"I read this play in college. Did I mention where I went to college? [Mention where you went to college.]"
"This play might have been served better by being filmed on stage for PBS' Great Performances, granted PBS continues to exist."
"Viola Davis will be just one audiobook away from an EGOT, missing only a Grammy. I hope she records the most impassioned, intense version of 'Goodnight Moon.'"
For a few weeks, it seemed like Barack Obama had abandoned us forever, and would spend the rest of his life frolicking in a private tropical paradise with Richard Branson. But today, the former president surfaced in New York City, where a street full of people suddenly, and vocally, realized how much they missed him.
But a 91-year-old great grandmother from Ohio named Jean Oddi's obituary paints a very clear picture of who she really was: a "bitch" with a "kind heart," according to her granddaughter, 45-year-old Melissa Herby Falter, who penned her grandma's obituary in first-person, Inside Edition reports. She kept it real as heck, just like her grandmother would have wanted.
"I was born. I lived. I died," the obit begins. "I hate to admit it, but evidently I died."
Evidently she did die, and god damn it I wish she hadn't. Because she is my new best friend and she will be yours, too.
Here's a photo of Oddi (center) with her daughter and granddaughter, and she really does seem like the GOAT:
I guess, after all these years, God finally figured out where to put me. I should have known the end was near after I had to be in room # 20 in the emergency room. I hate even numbers. I'm leaving behind a hell of a lot of stuff Casey and Melissa will have to get rid of. So, if you're looking for random crap, you should wait the appropriate amount of time and get in touch with them.
It then goes on to reveal her love of outlet shopping and throw some major shade at her dad:
But this is not the time to talk about what I may or may not have bought from the JC Penney Outlet or TJ Maxx, this is about me. I was born on September 7, 1925 in blah, blah, blah, the daughter of a wonderful and beautiful woman and an SOB man.
She then gives an epic list of shout outs to all of her friends and family (it does get a little sad at this point), and outlines her accomplishments, like receiving a "doctorate in Bitchology, please see my card."
At the very end, she drops some brilliant advice which we should all take if we want to end up like her. Obviously, we all do:
Please remember this never let the facts get in the way of a good story, the middle finger is sign language; when someone gives, take; when someone takes, scream, and take care of yourself don't get old. Oh, and don't tell anyone what kind of day to have.
And she says not to worry, wherever she is now, she's having a hell of a good time:
Don't cry because I'm gone, instead have a drink and be happy you knew me. Maybe you can cry a little bit, because, after all, I died. Now, and forever, I am happy and playing cards, with Jameson but not until 9 p.m. Cheers!
The obit includes information about her service, but with a caveat: "If you are sick, don't bother to come. I might be dead, but I still don't want your germs." Respect!
Oddi may have passed on. But she has clearly made an impact, even after her death. Her life-changing obit has gone viral, receiving hundreds of comments from complete strangers. Most of them, like me, say they wish they'd known her.
Now if you'll excuse me, I will be taking the rest of the day off to mourn my new best friend, Jean Oddi. The greatest bitchologist that ever lived.
Maryanne, 45, and Tommy, 59, Pilling are a couple who were both born with Down syndrome. At the time they wed, their marriage was controversial, according to the Independent. They are among the first, if not the first, couple with Down syndrome to get married in the UK. But now, 22 years later, they're still going strong.
Ms. Pilling's sister, Lindi Newman, told the Independent that their mother had "received a lot of flak at the time for letting them get married, but she insisted it was their decision." The couple had met about one and half years prior to the proposal.
She continued, "Maryanne had dreamed about a big white wedding since she was a little girl and that's exactly what she had. It was a beautiful day."
Ms. Newman added that the couple provides hope to other parents of children with Down syndrome.
She explained,
When they walk down the street holding hands they make a statement but in a good way.
Some people stare, they assume people with Down's Syndrome and learning difficulties can't get married. But we also get so many lovely lovely messages from people who are inspired by their story.
There are two things I know to be true in this world. 1: Group text messages can be risky and dangerous (how many times have you accidentally sent a text meant for one person to a whole group?), and 2: Hearing about your relatives' sex lives is awkward AF. One poor dude recently got both of those lessons in one when his parent's started sending sexy text messages in the family group chat.
A guy by the name of Kyle Hendry recently posted a screengrab of a group text conversation with his parents to Twitter.
It starts out with the family innocently discussing the recent snow accumulation in their area, and then...
And... there it is.
Obviously, Kyle's parents have a great sense of humor and the joke is all in good fun. But I think his decision to remove himself from the conversation before it really gets out of hand is a wise one.
Men, like women, deserve to be treated as human beings and seen for the complex humans they are, not just their physical attributes. No matter how round and perky their butt may be.
Which is why I'm sorry, Justin Trudeau, Canada's hot Prime Minister. I'm sorry the whole internet is currently obsessed with your butt and can't stop tweeting about how perfect and round and bubbly it is. I'm sorry Twitter is behaving like a drunk aunt at a wedding who starts creeping on all the guys after her third dry martini.
But the people have spoken. And I'm here to report the facts. So, here are some of the best tweets about the Canadian Prime Minister's butt:
I usually try not to post about politics on twitter, but I'm ready to start a conversation about Justin Trudeau's butt
Let's not forget that Justin Trudeau is a well-rounded individual with accomplishments that extend beyond the well-roundedness of his butt. JK, nothing extends beyond that butt.
HOWEVER, a few clever people across the pond in France figured out a way Barack Obama could technically become president again—but this time, the president of FRANCE, the Washington Post reports.
Seriously though. France is preparing for a presidential election in just a few months, and the current front-runners are problematic and polarizing. We all know how that can end.
So a group of French optimists have decided to try and bring a better option to the table, by recycling a former US President. But they don't want just any old US president—they want Barack Obama. And, like, I get it.
These posters have been appearing all over Paris in recent weeks:
But what about the fact that Obama is not French? That could be a benefit! “At a time when France is about to vote massively for the far right, we can give a lesson in democracy to the planet by electing a foreigner as French president,” says the website.
This all sounds like a great idea but there is one catch: Barack Obama would have to consent to this. And I'm pretty sure if and when they ask him, his response will go something like this:
OBAMA OUT.
Sorry, France. But also, not sorry. You already get everything.