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Microwaving fish in the office should be a fireable offense.


Is this kid mouthing 'F**k You' to Donald Trump in a video from Interior Secretary?

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Secretary of the Interior Ryan Zinke journeyed to meet young rangers at the the Channel Islands National Park. Almost certainly their own idea, without being prompted by Secretary Zinke, the kiddos wanted to send a greeting to President Donald Trump, to be the new USA Freedom Kids.

Vice pointed out that it sure looks like one of the kids is mouthing "f**k you" to the camera, and therefore, the president

Check out the kid in the bottom left.

Smack in the foreground—the most featured of all the children.

For realsies: Watch it again. He definitely, maybe mouths "f**k you."

"SO SMART!" indeed.

I believe that children are our future. Teach them well, and let them lead the way.

Watch women cry laughing as dude using labor pain simulator loses his mind.

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Recently, Lincoln Memorial University student Johnny Wade volunteered to be hooked up to a machine that simulates the pain women feel during childbirth. Of course, his fellow students couldn't resist filming his bad decision, and the resulting clip is so funny (and cringe-inducing) that it's become a huge hit on the internet. Proving once and for all that men are babies, he barely lasted through 20 seconds of simulated labor before tapping out.

If only women could just say "enough" and stop the pain. They have to endure it for eight hours. Plus stretch marks. Speaking of which, when's the last time you called your mom?

The only thing I fear more than the government shutting down is the government staying open

'Alternative' family photo goes viral with powerful message about co-parenting.

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Maelyn is a 4-year-old girl who recently posed for a photo at her soccer game with her four parents, all of them wearing custom-made jerseys for the occasion. The photo was shared by her stepmom, Emilee Plaayer, on Facebook, where it has gone massively viral. And not just because the jerseys are adorable (they are).

But more importantly, the photo sends a powerful message about co-parenting:

Because of us, I will never believe co-parenting can't work! I KNOW through experience it CAN WORK! Choose to do what's best for your child and everything will just fall into place ❤

Posted by Emilee Plaayer on Saturday, April 15, 2017

"Because of us, I will never believe co-parenting can't work!" wrote Plaayer in the caption of the photo. "I KNOW through experience it CAN WORK! Choose to do what's best for your child and everything will just fall into place ​​​​ ❤️"

The photo has been shared over 85,000 times since it was posted on Saturday. And thousands of commenters are applauding the family for achieving co-parenting #goals:

Over on Twitter, the photo is going viral as well. On Monday, someone shared a screenshot with the caption "How y'all feel about this?"

And apparently, people feel all sorts of ways about it.

Not everyone is on board.

This person just thinks everyone should call themselves mom or dad and leave "step" out of it entirely:

But most people are happy for them, especially those who can relate.

Then the family jumped in. Clearly, the love is real.

Co-parenting can be a challenge, because parenting can be a challenge no matter the circumstances. But this photo is a reminder that just because two parents split up, doesn't mean the whole family can't strive to peacefully, lovingly co-exist.

I mean, this little girl had four parents show up to her soccer game. We should all be so lucky.

Chris Pratt had a big day and Anna Faris adorably live-tweeted the whole thing.

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Guardian of the Galaxy and dinosaur herder Chris Pratt was honored with a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame on Friday, an exciting career milestone and an awesome day for him and his family. Anna Faris live-tweeted the family getting red carpet ready, in such great detail so we can pretend like we were there and are they're best friends they invite over for barbecues.

1. ♫7:36 AM wakin' up in the mornin', gotta be fresh gotta go downstairs♫

2. The sweet smell of success.

3. Shoutout to the fans.

4. Panty party.

5. Is Andy warming up for a Mouse Rat reunion?

6. Those are cool pants.

7. Enter: Glam Squad.

8. Surveying the great works of literature.

9. Namaste.

10. It's crunch time.

11. Sorry, Jack.

12. Male privilege.

13. *squeals at the cuteness*

14. Sorry, Hollywood people.

15. Uni-corny.

17. Carpool karaoke, anyone?

18. Sh*t's getting real.

19. They made it!

20. Jack meets once of Dad's costars.

And then later she retweeted this adorable picture which is too damn cute not to repost.

Congrats, Pratts!

Sorry I can't afford to be your bridesmaid.

Very confident man loses weightlifting bet in the most embarrassing way possible.

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This is the most epically terrible-slash-hilarious way to lose a bet.

This group of friends was at the gym, weightlifting, having some fun, when they decided to make things interesting. They bet one of their friends that he couldn't complete a bench press. If he did it, they'd give him $20.

The friend in question was very confident he could do it. That's what makes his downfall all the more spectacular.

Twitter user @mheaden31 couldn't have possibly predicted what was about to happen when he started recording this video:

I don't know what's better: the guy's fart, or the subsequent screaming laughter from his friends. But truly, if there was ever a more well-timed fart in the history of the world, I don't know what it is. Honestly, I'd give him the $20 just for that.

What a great way to start the weekend.


I always cry at weddings because they're never mine.

The Rock shared a powerful message for his daughter and it's not what you think.

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Ladies and gentleman, prepare to fall fast and furiously in love with Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson. Lol, as if you weren't already. The Fast and the Furious star and former pro-wrestling champ shared an emotional Instagram post on Wednesday about his "goals" for his 16-month-old daughter Jasmine. And it's maybe not exactly what you'd expect.

In the caption, he wrote:

There are mornings in life where there are no words.. this is not one of those mornings.
Jazzy, let daddy tell you his goals.
By 5, you'll be looking people in the eye when you firmly shake their hand. By 8, you'll know how to fish, drive daddy's pick up truck and do cardio. And by 10, you'll be able to directly say to people, "Great job, I like it a lot, but let's see how we can make it better". Helluva plan right sweetheart?

HELL. YES.

This is a pretty lofty list of goals, and probably not entirely serious (although if anyone can handle driving a truck at 8, it's The Rock's daughter). But what really stands out about this post is that Dwayne Johnson's goals for his daughter seem almost identical to the goals he might have for a son.

Of course, this should always be the case. But sadly, many little girls are never told "one day, you're going to drive a truck like a BOSS (if you want to, of course)."

And his daughter's response was truly the best:

Buh! *she points to the ground at a bug.
It was a good talk.

We always knew The Rock was a great dad. But we did not know he was a great feminist dad. And that's on us. I guess you shouldn't judge The Rock by his bulging biceps or former WWE career and the fact that he's called The Rock.

Also, keep an eye out for The Mini-Rock. We can expect her to be driving a pickup truck, catching fish and running a Fortune-500 company within the next three years.

Starbucks barista goes viral with emotional meltdown over the unicorn Frappuccino.

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If you're thinking about ordering one of Starbucks' new "Unicorn Frappuccinos," a drink so popular it inspired its own hairdo, you might change your mind after watching a young barista rant about the work that goes in to making one of these:

But, but, but, it's so beautiful and majestic! I wannnnnnnt!

The "color-changing, flavor-changing, potentially life-changing" new drink might be super Instagram-worthy, but apparently it's not super easy to make. In fact, the drink's explosive popularity seems to have driven young barista Braden Burson to the brink of despair.

A video of the 19-year-old Colorado native ranting about the popular drink went viral on Twitter, though he has since taken it down. It was then shared in the Facebook group "Barista Life" where it's been viewed nearly 1.5 million times.

If you're thinking of ordering a #UnicornFrappuccino, please don't. But, please share this PSA from @Braden Burson #BaristaLife #Starbucks 🦄🙅🏻‍♂️

Posted by Barista Life on Wednesday, April 19, 2017

"Pleeeease don't get it," Burson pleads in the video. "Everyone’s like, oh my gosh! I need to try it." He continues:

I have never made so many Frappuccinos in my life. My hands are sticky. I have Unicorn crap all in my hair, on my nose. I have never been so stressed out in my entire life. It has been insane. If you love us as baristas, don’t order it! It’s so difficult to make right after the other, and people were coming in left and right, in the drive-thru and in the front. For the love of God and everything that is good, DON’T GET THE UNICORN FRAPPUCCINO!”

Of course, the viral video made its way to Starbucks HQ, but the company has decided not to fire him, a spokesperson told TMZ. Apparently instead they said they were "interested in hearing more of Braden's feedback to improve the experience for customers and employees."

Luckily for Braden and other Starbucks baristas, the Unicorn Frappuccino will only be available through this Sunday. Meaning we only have two more days to resist ordering one. Even though, let's be honest, now that you know you shouldn't order it, you want one even more.

All hell breaks lose on American Airlines flight after employee 'hits' woman with baby stroller.

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It seems, increasingly, that airplanes are the worst places to be. This morning, news broke that a new shocking and upsetting incident occurred between an American Airlines employee and a passenger on a flight from San Francisco to Dallas. That means American Airlines has joined the ranks of United and Delta, both of whom have had numerous employee incidents that outraged the public and went viral over the last few months. (Though flying Spirit on a good day is always pretty demeaning, too.)

In the video, a woman can be seen hysterically sobbing. The clip was taken by passenger Surain Adyanthaya, The Daily Mail reports, who said he started taking recording the incident after a flight attendant "violently took a stroller from a lady with her baby on my flight, hitting her and just missing the baby." Adyanthaya's video, which was uploaded to Facebook yesterday evening, has already been viewed more than 976K times.

After the woman's stroller was reportedly taken from her violently, a passenger comes to the front of the plane to demand the name of the employee who did so, who had left the plane at that point. It's clear that other passengers found the incident jarring enough to stand up for the sobbing woman as well as begin recording it. Then, we see the flight attendant reenter the plane. At that point, as Adyanthaya explains, "he tried to fight a passenger who stood up for her." The man who initially had got up to ask the name of the flight attendant had returned to his seat, but he got up again when the flight attendant re-boarded the plane. The two men are standing very close to each other when you can hear the flight attendant provoke the passenger by saying "hit me" multiple times.

The passenger with her two children and the flight attendant.

Ultimately, Adyanthaya says, the woman was escorted off the plane, while the flight attendant was allowed to remain. Apparently the mom also asked for an apology and the airline declined. How many of these incidents do we need to hear about before we all decide that flying isn't worth it? Well, that's part of the problem. There's not much of a way around flying, unless you have plenty of time on your hands to Oregon Trail your way across the country. Which means the airlines have us trapped and willing to subject ourselves to their poor treatment. Ugh. The Daily Mail reports that the flight attendant has been suspended during the investigation of the incident. You can watch the video taken by Adyanthaya here:

Patton Oswalt reflects on the death of his wife Michelle McNamara, one year later.

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It's been one year since actor Patton Oswalt lost his wife, writer Michelle McNamara. Oswalt, a beautiful writer and eloquent speaker, talked movingly about dealing with grief and his wife's death during his Emmy speech in September, as well as in an essay. Yesterday, Oswalt posted a lengthy reflection on his wife's sudden death and the year that's followed on Facebook. "It's awful, but it's not fatal," he starts.

Since he's so skilled at putting his feelings and thoughts into words, I'll just include his post below in it's entirety for you to read and appreciate.

It's awful, but it's not fatal. That's the dispatch I'm sending back from exactly one year into this shadow-slog. A...

Posted by Patton Oswalt on Friday, April 21, 2017

We love you, Patton.

Cory Booker is patiently waiting on that date from Mindy Kaling, says 'she's amazing.'

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It's been about a month since Cory Booker and Mindy Kaling had the Twitter exchange that made us believe in love again. Kaling had agreed to dinner in New Jersey with the suave senator (he even offered to pay for her Lyft so she wouldn't have to take the PATH train!). And yet, the dude still has yet to lock down a date. So, what's the deal? Vanity Fair has an exclusive update from Booker (that will probably only make you want the couple to be a thing even more).

"Well first of all, don’t read too into it about 'asking out,'" Booker says of the lack of date. But don't let your hopes be dashed, because Booker goes on to say, "I want to sort of take the romantic aspect out of it and talk more about how she’s amazing." Ok, yes, we're with you, please do. And then:

"A lot of people read more into it then there’s there, but this is just somebody I really revere, and have just a reverence for in terms of her impact that she is making in so many ways. Just not only with women, people of color—so much visibility. She’s just an extraordinary force, and someone I have a lot of respect for. So, to have her come to my city to see it and to bring her spotlight there is a wonderful thing."

Uh, he freaking adores her and this is beautiful! Booker doesn't even mind that Kaling dissed his city, and yes, he's still hopeful about locking in that date in the future.

"Her show gave a little dis to Newark, and I’m a big defender of cities, and so I called her out on it. Not only did she say, hey, this is her character, not [her personal insult], but then she agreed to come over to Newark, New Jersey. She hasn’t yet. I mean, she’s a busy person . . . so we’ll see what happens in the future."

Mindy, please slide into this man's DM's like you're at a county fair with a potato sack in your hand and nothing to lose.

Twitter slams Kourtney Kardashian for wearing fur and mocking mental illness, all in one photo.

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Be careful what you meme, my friends, because a simple image/word combination can really come back to bite you in the ass—just ask Kourney Kardashian (or any of them for that matter). But this latest story has to do with Kourtney's most recent Instagram photo, which includes a picture of her in an oversized white tee shirt, sunglasses, sweatpants and Vans with the text "me after a mental breakdown."

"That poor animal had a mental breakdown before it was murdered," People reports that one commenter said. "Please just stop wearing fur."

The outrage was directed both towards the fur slung casually over Kourtney's shoulder, as well as her joke about mental breakdowns. Neither on their own would have went over well, and the combo was truly not ideal. The comments began to pour in on Instagram as well as on Twitter:

Some also pointed out that one of Kourney's family members, brother-in-law Kanye West (husband of Kim Kardashian) suffered a real mental breakdown just a few months prior.

Well, I guess if you've built a brand on giving the public something to talk about, you might not care if it's received well or poorly—just that people are talking at all. Seems a little bit warm for a fur, though.


Happy Earth Day to all remaining species.

Here are some of the smartest, funniest signs from today's March for Science happening around the world.

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Today is Earth Day, and it's also the first-ever March for Science, a demonstration happening around the world aimed to create awareness for the importance of scientific research and funding, as well as to protest Trump's anti-climate change views.

Scientists are feeling increasingly threatened by President Trump's policies and beliefs, and worried that funding could be dramatically cut during his presidency if the public isn't made aware of how important scientific research is to our lives. And while the people who came out today to march are definitely nerds, they're also funny and sassy as hell. Here are some of the signs from around the world at today's March for Science.

Katy Perry spits out first sip of Starbucks Unicorn Frappuccino, says she can't drink her own blood.

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Katy Perry's review of the new Unicorn Frappuccino—an eye-catchingly colorful, sweet-and-sour, totally-devoid-of-coffee, Lisa Frank-inspired abomination from the demented minds at Starbucks—was less than positive. But she had a relatable reason for hating it.

The viral beverage, which has captivated the national imagination while driving baristas to the brink of madness, is clearly already well out of hand. At least one woman has already used it to tell her partner that she's pregnant.

Perry sampled the neon concoction in an Instagram story while wearing a glamorous blonde wig and giving the camera a seductive look. But as soon as she got a hit of the flavor, she winced with what looked like instant nausea and spit it out. "I couldn't handle drinking my own blood," she explained in a caption.

Perry is hardly alone in despising the drink—here's what Anthony Bourdain said:

Wow, that’s like four things I hate all in one sentence: Starbucks, unicorns, and the colors pink and purple. Also a Frappuccino! It’s the perfect nexus of awfulness. Just add pumpkin spice to that mix, and you can nuke the whole county.

Please, sir—don't give them any ideas.

Political pundit whines about having to sit next to adorable dog on plane. Twitter destroys him.

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Mark Halperin is about as useless as political pundits get.

As an analyst for NBC and MSBNC, as well as a co-host of Showtime's The Circus—a program I literally didn't know existed until just now—he's technically best known for co-writing the hilariously petty book Game Changeabout the 2008 election. But just so you get a sense of his stupid opinions, he's also called Chris Christie "magical" and Barack Obama "kind of a dick." I bring up those comments because I'm trying to prepare you for this awful tweet.

Yep. That's Halperin—flying first-class—complaining that he has to sit next to what looks like the sweetest, cutest dog to ever board a commercial jet. IN A BOW TIE. How out of whack are your priorities that you'd complain about this?

Twitter, do your thing.

Gee, Mark—it's almost as if the internet isn't here for your anti-dog content?

Let's celebrate Earth Day by putting down our phones and looking at Earth.

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