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Lady Gaga gets best possible revenge on ex-classmates who bullied her with a Facebook group.

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We've all heard the saying "haters make me famous," but few celebrities have lived that truth as precisely as Lady Gaga. While it's well-known by now that she believes you just need one person in a room of 100 to believe in you, this mantra isn't just PR positivity, but comes from personal experience.

During her early college years at NYU, when Gaga was regularly performing at local bar shows, she had a loyal crew of haters. As many college students do, NYU students created a crop of small and niche Facebook groups dedicated to everything from eyebrows to music swapping. However, one very small and pointed group was dedicated to trash talking Gaga, then known by her real name Stefani Germanotta.

Members of the group, titled "Stefani Germanotta, you will never be famous" regularly posted about how she was "an attention whore" and would never make it big.

Back in 2016, a former classmate of Gaga's, Lauren Bohn, made a Facebook post detailing the innerworkings of the group.

When I was a freshman at NYU and Facebook was only a year old and people created/joined groups like "I have dimples,...

Posted by Lauren Bohn on Sunday, January 17, 2016

She wrote about how Gaga's story serves as an ideal example of what happens when you lean into your drive, and not what other people project onto you.

"When I was a freshman at NYU and Facebook was only a year old and people created/joined groups like "I have dimples, f*** me" and "Fake ID, please!," I remember coming across a Facebook group that broke my heart. It's name: "Stefani Germanotta, you will never be famous."

"The page housed pictures of a pretty Norah Jones-esque young 18-year-old NYU student who sang and played piano at local bars. The group was peppered with comments, sharp as porcupine needles, vilifying the aspiring musician for being an "attention-whore." Scores asked: "Who does she think she is?" I also remember one dude posting a flyer for one of her upcoming gigs at a local village bar. He had clearly stomped on the flyer, an outline of his muddy sole [soul] struggling to eclipse her name."

"I couldn't shake the raw feeling of filth while scrolling down that Facebook page, but I pretty much -- and quickly -- forgot about that group and that girl with the intense raven eyes."

"Until about five years later. I was on an Amtrak train from NYC to Philly, reading a Vanessa GrigoriadisNew York Magazine profile on Lady Gaga. I floated somewhat mindlessly through the piece until I got to the first sentence of the second graf:"

"Before the meeting, I assumed that someone with a stage name like “Lady” (her given name is Stefani Joanne Germanotta) was going to be a bit standoffish..."

HOLY SHIT, I screamed to an empty car (Those who hang with me will know that I actually shrieked). LADY GAGA IS STEFANI GERMANOTTA? STEFANI IS LADY GAGA?"

"I was overcome with a dizzying emotional cocktail of stage-mom-at-a-beauty-pageant and nerd-revenge triumph. But also shame. Shame that I never wrote on that group, shame that I never defended the girl with the intense raven eyes -- the girl whose brave flyers were stomped on, probably somewhere near my dorm."

"But again, I soon forgot about that revelation and that feeling. Feelings. They're so fleeting. Even more so, revelations. We need to constantly re-discover them every damn day. Like last week, when I woke up to this meme. I saw the muddy sole eclipsing her name. The eye-rolls. The cowardly virtual-giggles. The "Who does she think she is?""

"I've got a lot of feelings, but the easiest one to articulate: gratitude. Stefani, thank you. Thank you for always thinking you're a superstar, for using your cracks to let the light come out more brightly. Humans, let's follow suit. #LadyGaga#ThatsWho"

Needless to say, Gaga got the ultimate revenge by becoming super famous and beloved. What's more, she broke barriers this year by becoming the first woman to win an Oscar, Grammy, BAFTA and Golden Globe in one year.

People are legitimately curious about how those 12 Facebook Members feel about their petty cruelty now.

Others noted how this just exemplifies that people will hate on anyone and any project, and that should never be a reason to stop.

But also, people can't stop roasting how the group only had 12 members in the first place, a paltry number indeed.


25 Boozy Memes For Anyone Who's Getting Lit This Weekend.

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If you're planning to get your drink on this weekend this meme list is for you. It's hilarious, relatable, and won't give you a hangover. I'll drink to that.

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14 people reveal the insanely popular movies they secretly hate. It’s war.

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It's fitting that fresh off the Oscars, we'd contemplate popular films and their respective fandoms. Some movies are critically acclaimed and/or commercially successful, but you can't comprehend why people love them and shower their creators with praise. It's scary to 'come out' as critical of something popular, especially if the movie conveys an important message. But sometimes, the blockbuster that everyone's obsessed with just isn't that good - at least not from your perspective.

Redditor badboyballu broached the subject by asking: 'Which insanely popular or successful movie [do] you secretly hate but are afraid to say if (sic) in the open fearing backlash from "fans"'? The responses came fast and furious. Below are the fourteen most memorable ones.

1. ellegavillawngnome f*cking hated 'Gravity' but works for an aerospace firm.

Fucking Gravity. I hated that movie. I work for an aerospace firm that makes stuff for the ISS. That movie felt like a reason to get Sandra Bullock in her skimpies. Space isn't sexy. Space is full of a rats nest of cables and 30 year old equipment that's miraculously being kept on life support by an extremely dedicated group of engineers.

That, and what the fuck was satellite debris doing in the same orbit as the ISS?

2. Wait until you hear about his personal life, Fiberrig.

I really dont like woody allen, find him pretty annoying

3. pupperlove doesn't 'get' The Notebook, which I TOTALLY get.

The notebook. I don’t get what’s so romantic about a guy hanging on a ferris wheel to make you go on a date with him. That’s basically blackmailing.

4. Balki-Bartokomous won't be seeing 'The Room' anytime soon.

Anything that's "so bad that it's good".

I can't watch that shit.

5. Gramps_MVP isn't here for Sandra Bullock blindfolded.

Bird Box

6. No sequels for you, nlkt.

Jurassic World. I don't get how it became so popular. I secretly want the dinosaurs to win and eat all the main characters.

7. raffertyb2001 doesn't have children, apparently. That movie is an A/V pacifier.

Frozen. Watched it once, thought "eh Disney" and 6 years later remnants of it still continue to surface

8. ZeusiQ calls bullsh*t on 'Avatar,' which I also dislike because it's not 'Titantic.' Rude!

Avatar.

It's a live action Fern Gully.

9. SrP0tat0 debunked critics' fawning assessment of Seth Rogen's fast food filth.

Sausage Party, all critics liked it because it had "meaning" but I thought it was an inmature and obnoxious experience.

10. MpVpRb's opinion is clear, if vague - and stated behind a username. *shrugs*

I'm not afraid to clearly state my opinion of anything

I don't like any of the current crop of action movies

11. yrqrm0 wasn't ga ga for La La.

La La Land. It was just a love letter to musicals of the past. Well-done, but not groundbreaking or particularly memorable in and of itself. All of my friends who had never really seen musicals went crazy for it and I couldn't stand hearing the songs from it played.

12. annoying_greentea doesn't love this YA action franchise.

The Hunger Games is probably my favorite book series, but the first three movies suck. I didn't watch the last one.

13. Not_My_Emperor dragged dull Oscar bait.

"Lincoln" was a mind-numbingly boring movie that's "highlights" were Daniel Day-Lewis being Daniel Day-Lewis with a fake beard. I majored in Political Science (pro-tip: DON'T). I knew what was going on and the maneuverings that were happening and etc. Did not change the fact that it was an insanely boring movie.

14. Is this an unpopular opinion, Waddlow? I'm out of the loop.

Ready Player One was horrendous and should have been offensive to anyone who's ever played a video game, something which Spielberg has clearly never done.

25 hilarious tweets from women this week that have nothing to do with Trump.

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It was a crazy week. Michael Cohen testified before Congress and implicated the president in at least 11 different felonies. President Trump flew to Vietnam to meet with Kim Jong Un and got nothing other than selfies with the dictator. It was revealed that Trump demanded that his son-in-law Jared Kushner get top secret security clearance over the objections of the CIA, so go ahead and propose to Tiffany now if you want that classified intel.

None of these tweets have anything to do with those things. Enjoy!

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This 'Fox & Friends' guest bizarrely criticized Ocasio-Cortez and her Green New Deal. The internet is confused.

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I consume a LOT of media, and most of it's television. Okay, the hours spent mindlessly browsing online definitely rival the amount of TV I watch - but there's something intoxicating about letting audio-visual goodness wash over you and escaping into something televised (or streamed on your laptop when you should be sleeping). Occasionally, someone comes across the screen that possesses a star quality, an indefinable X Factor that makes it impossible to avert your gaze. Yesterday, 'Fox & Friends' viewers met a special man whose take on AOC's Green New Deal was so transfixing, people couldn't look away from it - or stop talking about it. Roll clip!

...sorry, what? He definitely meant 'AOC' as in 'Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez', whose recent installation as the youngest-ever Congresswoman has conservatives shaking in their loafers. But the rest of his statement is difficult to parse. Luckily for the rest of the Internet, Twitter tried - and delivered some hilarious reactions.

And if Brian is proven correct, the story will continue developing and get much, much stranger.

Guy discovers girlfriend's gross wiping habit and asks the internet for non-sh*tty advice.

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When you first move in with a significant other, it's an exciting time that can also be super awkward. You're cohabiting with someone you care about but don't know extremely well yet. You're poised to discover the quirks and eccentricities they conceal from the outside world. Whether someone keeps the pantry obsessively organized or sings opera while showering, you'll find out. And some habits are more endearing than others, as one Redditor learned the hard way recently.

User whattodobedroom turned to the Internet for advice regarding a...messy situation with his live-in girlfriend. Stop reading now if you're eating or easily grossed out. You've been warned!

Throwaway, because reasons.

TL;DR: Found my gym socks in the garbage covered in poop. Asked girlfriend about it. She started yelling at me and crying and left.

I don't even know where to start with this. I'm dumbfounded. She just stormed out the house and I'm sitting on the bed asking myself A LOT of questions.

I live a pretty normal life, and I thought so did my girlfriend. We've been together for a few months and after things got serious, we moved in together. We started sharing a lot of the household responsibilities, but the one thing she was adamant on doing was the laundry. She would come home and find me in the bedroom getting the laundry together and would quickly ask me to go do something else. I'd come back to finish the laundry and she would have already started it. I always thought it was sweet and never her job to do it alone, but hey, if it makes her happy to do it all the time, I wouldn't stop her.

This is where it takes a turn for the weird. I keep all my socks and underwear in the bottom drawer of my dresser. I also go to the gym frequently, so I always keep a good supply of clean gym socks ready to go. I never kept count, but I know by just a visual glance I several pairs. This morning when I went to grab a fresh pair to pack for the gym, I noticed there were several dress socks, but no gym socks. Again, not weird, they must have been in the laundry. I went to check the laundry basket and it was empty, so I checked the washing machine and dryer. Both were empty. I couldn't figure out where all of my gym socks had gone. So, I did the very natural thing of asking my girlfriend what had happened to them. After all, she is the one who does the laundry all the time. She went silent, turned red and ran out of the room. When I went after her to see if she was okay she wouldn't talk to me. I told her I wasn't mad, I was just looking for my socks. She kinda mumbled "I'll don't know." I still wasn't mad, of course, but I was super confused. Socks just don't disappear. So I asked her again, even laughed about it and she just looked at me and got mad and said "I'll buy you new ones!"

The first thought that went through my head was she had somehow managed to destroy my socks while washing them. I thought the sight of that was actually pretty funny, so I joked with her about ruining my socks. Wrong. Thing. To. Say. She started immediately crying. Like, full on sobbing. At this point I don't care about the socks anymore, I want to know what's wrong with my girlfriend. I sat down next to her on the bed and put my arm around her and asked her of she was okay. She just kept saying she was sorry and that she would buy me new socks. I tried assuring her again it was okay. Even went so far as to say I would buy new socks and she didn't have to. I sat with her for a few minutes trying to calm her down and eventually had to get ready for work. I told her loved her and got my things together to leave for the day.

On my way out I grabbed the garbage to take outside. When I got outside I lifted the lid off the garbage can and I noticed a small plastic bag sitting on top of the garbage already in there. I could see through the bag (kind of the semi see through ones) there were socks in the bag. Since I was sure she had somehow managed to ruin the socks washing them, I wanted to see for myself. I opened the bag and immediately regretted my choice. There, inside the bag, were several pairs of my gym socks covered in what looked like poop. As soon as the smell hit me I knew it WAS POOP.

  1. We don't own any pets.

  2. We don't have any kids.

  3. WHOSE POOP WAS ON MY SOCKS?

Work could wait. I couldn't go the rest of the day wondering why my gym socks were covered in poop and inside a plastic bag in the garbage can. I grabbed the bag and walked back inside. As soon as my girlfriend saw the bag she flipped out and started yelling at me. She said I shouldn't be going through the garbage and that I was disgusting for bringing it back into the house. I asked her to calm down and that I just wanted an answer as to why there was poop on my socks. I wasn't blaming her of anything, but she started accusing me of blaming her. That's when it clicked. I don't know what it was that lead me to ask this, but everything leading up to this moment had just been so crazy. I asked her "Is this your poop?" She started sobbing again and ran out of the house. I didn't go after her this time.

'Is this your poop?'

So, now I am sitting on my bed with a bag a poopy socks on the floor and a lot of questions in my head. The only conclusion is that she used them after going to the bathroom. Which that alone has its own set of questions above everything else. I sent her text asking her to come back. She hasn't responded yet. I don't even know what I'm going to say when (IF) she gets back.

UPDATE:

Yes, there's an update!

I had to leave for work and am now at work. Yes, I threw away the bag of poopy socks. She texted me back and she's clearly embarrassed, but felt she owed me an explanation. She said she didn't want to talk about it in person and that we could discuss it over texting and to NOT bring it up in person. I'm condensing the conversation and filling in some gaps as best as I can. Her responses are super short, but I'm getting the idea.

I flat out asked her if it was a fetish. It is not a fetish. She confessed to using the socks after going to the bathroom. I found the reason she always does the laundry is because she was hiding the fact that she uses socks to wipe with, primarily her own. I had no reason to question the amount of socks she ever has because who pays attention to that kind of thing? She thought I would notice and think it was weird since she doesn't own many socks. She admitted she has done this for a long time. Her reasoning, as best as I can understand, is that because she is a germaphobe (her word) and she is afraid toilet paper will tear and is afraid of getting her hands messy in ANY WAY. She uses socks because it covers her entire hand. After she's done with them, she throws them away. She used mine because she didn't have other socks.

So, my girlfriend has a fear of getting poop on her hands so she wipes with socks, and has done so for a lone time. It could be worse, I guess. I hope we can laugh about this later. I'm trying to find the humor in it now, but I'm still weirded out.

As you might expect, the community had a lot to say. For one thing: her 'lifehack' isn't even that effective!

Socks aren’t waterproof AKA poop proof. A really wet wipe will touch her hand regardless. This is the worst solution to a problem I’ve heard. She should use medical gloves and tissue paper. Or a bidet.

-joenastyness

In all seriousness, Reddit offered the OP - and his germaphobic partner - some great tips.

If it's OCD it doesn't have be scientifically sound just make sense or feel right to her

-antiqualumina

It would probably be ultimately cheaper to buy one of those expensive Japanese toilets that shoots warm water at your butt after you are done.

-always_reading

Get her some of these: https://www.ebay.com/i/264074199934?chn=ps

-dietCOKAY

Cloth wipes are a thing.

Or, a cheap yard of flannel fabric from the craft store and use pinking shears to cut it to the desired size. Like, there are super reasonable solutions to her issue, I don’t get why socks were the ultimate solution for her.

-bexallday

Somewhere in another sub, if you search by new, you'll probably find a "My boyfriend found out about my fecal sock fetish" post.

-bingingwithballsack

This mom caught a daycare provider breastfeeding her baby and people freaked the f*ck out.

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Red Sox versus Yankees, Coke versus Pepsi, Backstreet Boys versus N'SYNC: three rivalries that inspire fierce loyalty to each side. And if you're a mother, there's an additional divisive issue you likely fall on one side of: breast milk versus formula. One mom experienced a disturbing incident in which her daycare provider made EXTREMELY clear which one she favors and it's freaking the Internet out big time.

Dear Prudie is an advice column that Daniel Mallory Ortberg writes for Slate and sometimes the source of hilarious and/or infuriating letters. An adoptive mom who feeds her baby formula (because she's obviously not lactating) happened upon her daycare provider breastfeeding her infant. The provider claimed she was 'saving the baby from chemicals [the mother] was trying to force into her body'.

The mom grabbed her diaper bag and ran, then wrote a letter to Prudie soliciting feedback. Though Prudie's the professional, commenters naturally had something to say. I mean, who wouldn't?

And so the fight between Breast Is Best and Formula Is Fine rages on, with seemingly no end in sight. What's next? A single dad rigs a contraption that funnels only Capri Sun into his children's mouths? That would be dope, actually.

21 Memes Jesus Isn't Going To Be Happy You Laughed At.

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These dirty memes are funny as f*ck. If you catch yourself laughing at this, congratulations, you have a filthy mind.

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This professor held his student's baby for an entire lecture, receives an A+ from classmates.

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What is the opposite of toxic masculinity? I'm not sure of the exact terminology, but this story definitely fits the criteria. Dr. Nathan Alexander, a math professor at Morehouse College, helped out a student who couldn't find a babysitter by allowing him to bring the child to class. But he didn't stop there. He also offered to hold the baby for the entire lecture so that his student could take better notes. Don't worry, someone snapped a photo.

Because this is the sweetest, most adorable thing ever, it immediately went viral. People were so impressed by this profressor's compassion, and some shared stories about when they were parents/students.

Clearly, people were feeling the love. The student's wife caught wind of the story and shared her gratitude via a Facebook post. She wrote:

Seeing the outpouring of support from friends, family, and strangers for Assata and Wayne is a sight to behold. I can feel the genuine love and enthusiasm. We never asked for attention; all that I’ve personally asked for is authenticity in your love and support. We are new parents. Wayne works two jobs and is a full-time student. He's rarely at home because he's out there providing for us. With us being thousands of miles away from family and friends, I'm usually left with the baby to myself. Anyone who is and has been a new mommy understands how overwhelming it can get. Wayne wanted to give me a break. Plus, he'd get to spend more time with Assata in the process. It's a win-win. Thank you for encouraging us to continue to push forward. Thank you to black educators like Dr. Nathan Alexander for your compassion and understanding. This came at the right time. We plan and Allah plans; verily, Allah is the best of Planners.

Alexandar even took the time to thank everyone for sending him kind words online. This man is...perfect.

It's so nice to see a professor who supports and truly cares for his students. Being a student and a parent is incredibly challenging, and it makes a world of difference to have a teacher who understands that and steps in when needed. We can all learn from this professor. Men, take note.

John Mulaney shared his new stand up routine while hosting SNL and it did not disappoint.

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Formerwriter and comedy darling John Mulaney returned to SNL as the show's host last night. The reviews are in, and damn are they good. Mulaney clearly brought his writing chops with him, as the entire episode was full of fun, clever sketches. But perhaps the most memorable moment of the night was Mulaney's opening monologue, which he essentially treated as a short stand up set.

Anyone who is familiar with Mulaney's work knows that he's one of the best stand up comedians of our time. He has released three stand up specials in the past seven years, all of which received rave reviews from critics and fans alike. And most importantly, he has developed an adorable and blossoming friendship with SNL cast member and OG big dick energy extraordinaire Pete Davidson.

The point is, Mulaney is well on his way to becoming a comedy legend. And during his SNL monologue last night, he proved that has no plans on slowing down when it comes to creating new material. During the seven minute bit, Mulaney talked about his old cocaine habits, his parents' request to ask his Jewish girlfriend to convert to Catholicism (lol), and his admiration for the female announcer on the New York City subway. His delivery was as charming and sharp as ever, and the audience was eating it all up.

You can watch the full video here:

Honestly, maybe SNL should consider asking Mulaney to come work for them again. Just spit ballin' here...

19 Men share times they stood up to misogyny. Yes all men should take note.

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Bad men: the world is full of them! So, where have all the good men gone? Twitter user @emrazz set out to find them by asking men to share times they saw misogynistic or predatory behavior and spoke up.

Men actually delivered, and the replies are restoring our hope in huMANity. Here are some of our favorite responses.

Louder for the men in the back: tell your friends when they're being creeps.

There may be hope for men after all.

Ivanka joked that she has 'the hardest job in the world' and she promptly got heckled.

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Ivanka Trump, daughter or our reality TV star president is having a real poor little rich girl moment.

You'd think life would be pretty easy when you were born into super-privilege and your wealthy president father loves you so much that it's borderline illegal, but everyone has problems. After all, the Kardashians get stressed every now and then--there's a whole television show to prove it.

At the annual, very formal Gridiron dinner in Washington, D.C., a lot of jokes were made. The 134-year-old tradition hosted by the Gridiron Club and Foundation to honor elite Washington journalists, reporters and politicians is more of a roast battle than a traditional fancy-person event. Amy Klobuchar‌, a 2020 Democratic hopeful, made several self-deprecating jokes mocking a report that she ate a salad with a comb. Things got interesting, though, when Ivanka Trump replaced President Trump and became something of a comedian herself.

Recognizing that she is often criticized for encouraging Americans to work harder despite the fact that she'd never have to work a day in her life if she didn't want to, Ivanka joked, "as if being Donald Trump's daughter isn't the hardest job in the world." I don't know, Ivanka, have you ever tried being a construction worker? A brain surgeon? A firefighter? A busboy? Your job isn't hard and nobody is convinced it's even a real job.

I think we can all recognize that Ivanka might be capable of satire, but the internet wasn't ready to let this slide.

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Maybe leave the comedy to Stormy?

21 hilarious exchanges with delivery drivers that are spicier than the food.

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We live in a time of extreme convenience. With the tap of a few buttons (and the availability of some extra cash), you can have any dream snack delivered to your front door by another human being, and honestly, it's pretty amazing.

Naturally, this age of extreme convenience still has some kinks in the gears. The meal ordering process often involves texting with the delivery person making your food dreams come true, and these exchanges can get super spicy.

While most of the time ordering food is a mindless transaction with nothing notable to write home about, there are times the text exchanges possess their own hilarious emotional arc. So, I have gathered 21 notable exchanges in honor of all the delivery people out there adding extra flavor to the transaction.

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26 Workplace Memes Everyone Should Laugh At By 5pm.

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Studies show laughing at these hilarious workplace memes will increase your productivity by 300%. I made that study up myself. You're welcome.

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Pete Davidson and Kate Beckinsale sloppily making out next to Antoni is an instant meme.

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By now it's likely you've already heard the rumors that Pete Davidson and Kate Beckinsale are an item. The two have been spotted flirting and making heart eyes at each other since the Golden Globes, and while they avoided directly confirming their status for awhile, the cat of their coupledom is now fully out of the bag.

Over the weekend, the two were sighted making out teen-style at a Rangers game, and they were not holding back. This was some full-on honeymooner level of spitting in each other's mouths, the thirst is real and now documented in viral photos.

While the PDA pictures were destined to make the internet rounds by themselves, the zoomed out snapshots show the beloved Antoni from Queer Eye sitting near them, and his deep looks of discomfort immediately became a meme.

Antoni's face sums up all of us when we're stuck on the bus across from a 15-year-old couple eating each other's faces, he is all of us when we find ourselves as a third wheel with no warning.

The emotional landscape of this photo truly sums up the current timeline we're all living in.

Antoni already puts in emotional labor on Queer Eye, he should be able to chill at a Rangers game without witnessing amateur softcore porn.

Truly, his face is the perfect summation of how it feels to watch your friend date someone awful.

He is literally sitting next to them, desperately trying to stake out a quick escape route.

Antoni really, really deserves so much better than this nonsense.

Hopefully, Antoni made it home safe so he could season some perfectly ripe avocados.


5 people having a worse Monday than you.

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5. Kylie Jenner, because her baby daddy allegedly cheated on her and her best friend allegedly kissed her sister's baby daddy.

True love can weather the Stormi.

The latest episode in the soap opera that the Kardashians call life involves the Kylie Jenner (the one with the lips) allegedly finding "evidence" that Travis Scott (the one with her in the photo) cheated.

Last week, TMZ "reported" that Kylie accused Travis of cheating. His reps released a statement denying the report, but then Travis deleted his entire Instagram, which is the millennial equivalent of confessing to a crime.

All this relationship drama is going on while Kylie also deals with a friendship plotline, after her BFF (and Kylie Cosmetics Jordyn Palette™ makeup muse) Jordyn Woods allegedly hooked up with Khloe Kardashian's now-ex, Tristan Thompson.

Woods went on Jada Pinkett Smith's Facebook talk show to discuss the scandal, insisting that while she and Thompson never had intercourse, Thompson did indeed kiss her—and the 21-year-old blames herself.

Jordyn Woods Shares The Truth

Jordyn Woods comes to The Red Table for an emotional first interview about the public scandal involving NBA Star Tristan Thompson, the father of Khloe Kardashian's daughter. She addresses the rumors and accusations. What really happened that night? It’s an RTT exclusive.

Posted by Red Table Talk on Friday, March 1, 2019

Khloe was initially all, "screw you Jordyn you ruined by family!!!!"

Then, likely because Kris Jenner noticed that Twitter reactions to Woods' interview was protective and positive, she decided that it's Tristan Thompson's fault that Tristan Thompson cheated on her.

Kylie's momager is likely telling her that she can't see her best friend again until the family can officially decide on a narrative for Woods, as they are currently vacillating between "evil seductress" and "innocent youngen."

It is very difficult to—and I cannot emphasize this eneough—keep up with the Kardashians.


4. The North Dakota State University Bisons, the latest victims of the White House kitchen.

Without a government shutdown to blame it on, the Trump White House has decided to stick to its schtick of serving athletes fast food to celebrate their accomplishments.

The NCAA champions were treated to Chik-Fil-A sandwiches and a side of "no collusion" when President Trump welcomed the athletes and demonstrated that he's running out of ideas.

Once again, Michelle Obama's White House vegetable garden was spotted weeping.


3. The Michael Jackson estate, because it's getting harder to pretend that Jackson isn't Bad.

A smooth criminal.

Last night, HBO aired the first two hours of Leaving Neverland, a documentary in which two men detail the alleged sexual abuse they experienced at the hands of the late King of Pop.

For the last fifteen years of his life, Jackson had been trailed by child sex abuse allegations. He stood trial and was acquitted of allegedly molesting an eight-year-old cancer patient in 2005, which gave fans the confidence they needed to keep moonwalking.

#LeavingNeverland was the number one trending topic on Twitter as people tuned in to see two now-grown men separately describe the abuse in harrowing detail as patterns began to emerge.

Many people voiced their disgust at Jackson and their support for Robson and Safechuck, while other fans who presumably weren't in the room with the pop star took to Twitter to declare "MICHAEL JACKSON INNOCENT !!!"

Pundits are saying that this documentary irreparably tarnishes Jackson's legacy.

The Jackson estate has sued HBO, and is calling the documentary "another rehash of dated and discredited allegations."

In the end, what it comes down to is whether or not you can hear "The Way You Make Me Feel" without feeling a knot in your stomach.


2. The bus driver charged with DUI, child endangerment for abandoning kids at a gas station.

"Good luck kids! Bye!!!"

A bus driver chose the worst possible time to quit her job: in the middle of a shift.

WFMZ reports that Lori Ann Mankos of Walnutport, Pennsylvania was drunk driving a group of middle- and high school kids on Friday afternoon when she said "f*ck it" and just pulled over at a gas station.

According to state police, Mankos parked the bus at a Sunoco station, got out, passed the keys to a station attendant, and walked away. Thankfully, no kids were harmed, so it's okay to find this somewhat hilarious. Many parents picked up their kids at the gas station, while others were driven by an emergency bus driver who was called in from the reserves and took over.

You can't help but feel impressed—not even your dad could abandon and endanger that many kids in one fell swoop.


1. The 81 people named in the massive House Judiciary Committee investigation into all crimes Trump.

All in the family.

With requests for documents from just about everyone ever, the Democrats have officially launched their investigation into possible obstruction of justice, corruption, and abuse of power by Trump, his administration and his family (like there's a difference).

Armed with subpoena power, Rep. Jerrold Nadler (D-NY), Chairman of the House Judiciary Committee, wrote to 81 individuals and organizations connections to the president, humbly requesting documents that may shed light onto Trump's corruption even more than his Twitter account already has.

Per The New York Times (read this in a "side effects may include" Viagra commercial voice for maximum effect):

The letters from Mr. Nadler, dated March 4, went to 81 agencies, individuals and other entities tied to the president, including the Trump Organization, the Trump campaign, the Trump Foundation, the presidential inaugural committee, the White House, the Justice Department, the F.B.I. and dozens of the president’s closest aides who counseled him as he launched attacks against federal investigations into him and his associates, the press, and the federal judiciary. The committee will also investigate accusations of corruption, including possible violations of campaign finance law, the Constitution’s ban on foreign emoluments and the use of office for personal gain.

Names on this cursed list include: Donald Trump Jr., Eric Trump, Jared Kushner, the NRA, the Trump Organization, the Trump Transition, the Trump Campaign, and the Trump Inaugural Committee.

Notably absent is the name Ivanka Trump, likely because Daddy would burn the House down and they're hopefully saving it for later.

Don Jr. is very chill about this, pulling a classic "whatabout" and linking to an old article from the Hillary Clinton-obsessed conservative group Judicial Watch.

The countdown is on for the inevitable Trump tweet: "Joke's on you, Dumbocrats. You're going to have to READ all these documents."

19 people share the juiciest gossip they've heard in their social circles. Threesomes for everyone.

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Everyone loves a piping hot piece of juicy town gossip.

While it's never a good idea to spread rumors or hate in your workplace or community, sometimes people are sloppy with their secrets and it shows. If you didn't catch on to at least one teacher from your high school dating another teacher or far worse, dating a student--you must've missed the clues. While some people are able to keep double families secret from one another for decades, others are so obvious with their affairs that all it takes is one scroll through Tinder to uncover the truth. To be fair, having one family looks hard enough--two families? Why? Drama is everywhere if you pay attention, dive in!

So, when a recent Reddit user asked, "What's some juicy gossip you just found out in your personal lives?" the internet had a lot to unpack. Get ready to live vicariously through the spicy secrets of others, because these could all be soap operas.

1. Kids know everything, "yung_neill."

I just found out my neighbour has been having an affair with another one of my neighbours and the kids figured it out.

I used to see them go jogging sometimes.

2. Smart parents, "hammercat605."

That my brother asked my mom for a $1000 for rent, she gave him $1400 so he could also pay back a loan. Then he turned around and also asked my dad for $1000 for rent which he also gave him. He then turned around and used the money to buy tickets to burning man.

My parents aren't going to lend out anymore money without talking to each other first.

3. Typical day at church, "GSG2150."

Our pastor was having an affair with his cousins wife. One day while giving a sermon the cousin storms into church, tackles the pastor and starts to throw haymakers at him. The cousins wife is trying to pull her husband off the pastor. The pastors wife quickly figured out what was happening, ran up and clocked the wife from behind knocking her out. People are trying to separate everyone. Total chaos.

4. Wow this is impressive, "IWasA_Mistake."

My cousin has been together with his wife for 14 years and has had a girlfriend for just as long! Neither of them knew about the other. He got caught because of an image on Facebook. His wife’s sister posted a family picture which my cousin was in and got recognized by his girlfriend’s sister’s acquaintance.

He got away with that for FOURTEEN YEARS!

5. Oh my god, "Ematt333."

I have a coworker I’ll call Jess, who always talks about her kids in detail and asks for favors because of her kids; ie picking up shifts, asking for rides, etc...

One of our other coworkers son goes to the same bar as said girl (she doesn’t know who he is) and one night was spilling her guts about how she always takes advantage of her coworkers and that she doesn’t even have kids.

She doesn’t know that we know.

6. Damn, "cafezinhos."

My two friends just found out they have the same sugar daddy. They had both been under the impression that they were exclusive with him.

7. Hardcore, "crazydaisy8134."

My hairdresser is leaving her husband and 5 kids to marry an Italian basketball player.

8. Good hiding place, "MaxFart."

My grandpa had a secret Alaskan family no one knew about. Thanks 23 & Me!

9. This is spicy, "Justadropinthesea."

Manager is having threesomes with two servers.

10. Oh hell no, "colt45feelnaliv."

My coworker makes $10 an hour works part time and pays for her live-in, still married, boyfriends rent and CHILD SUPPORT cuz he’s “broke.” She just found his bank receipt showing $17k in his checking account.

11. This is bold, "JumpDaddy92."

My friend sent me a screenshot of some dudes tinder bio that said “married. No, she doesn’t know I’m on here, and I plan to keep it that way.”

With multiple pictures of his face.

12. Shoutout to the person, "shannontara."

Well my dog acts like she doesn’t like our new cat BUT I caught them playing last night and as soon as she noticed me she runs over to me pretending she wasn’t playing! Scandal!!

I have no life - this was the peak of my weekend.

13. Woah, "undercoverstroker."

Commenting from my other account...

A couple that we have been friends with for a few years now, both very normal people with vanilla jobs, took a trip overseas that was supposed to last a week.

Not unusual for any of our group of friends.

No one had heard from them for close to a month until we found out they've been arrested on the other side of the fucking earth trying to smuggle out close to 1 fucking million dollars for an international drug cartel out of the country they where visiting.

When we heard the news we where just sitting there quietly in disbelief for about 5 min...

14. Nice, "anonesuch."

I found out from an insurance company that I was dead

Turns out when I went off to Uni my father tried to take me off his insurance and the company wanted to charge a fee for changing the insurance policy. He then asked whether they would charge if I had died, they said no, he then declared me dead.
Thanks dad.

15. This sounds fun, "Kjsuited."

I know a guy who got his friend to marry him so he can get a green card. Except his friend was already in a relationship. Not only did my friend get married, he also inherited a boyfriend-in-law. Now the three of them live in the same house.

16. Aw, "Not-a-Leg."

My friend has a birthmark on his penis.

17. Good for them, "MajorMustard."

One of the girls in our group of friends has never really gotten over her ex that left her 3 years ago. She will often bring him up when drunk and it has really hampered her dating life.

He lives thousands of miles away, and today he posted a picture of him sitting with an attractive dude getting coffee. They are holding hands and their legs are touching.

We were all sitting around the TV hanging out when she saw the picture. Shell shock is the best description for her face.

18. We all want to follow this, "bethel1998."

Some girl in our year at school posted on facebook the other day how her boyfriend had supposedly cheated on her. They had a full blown argument in the comments just on facebook for everyone to see. Yesterday she posted a picture of some keys tagging her boyfriend in it saying "just bought our first house together!"

19. New sibling, "dancinginside."

Recently got my AncestryDNA results back and found out I have a half sister of a different ethnicity, as a product of my father’s cheating ways...

18 people share the darkest scandals from their small towns. Lock your doors.

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If you've ever watched Twin Peaks (or really any handful of popular television shows), you know that every small town has its dark, juicy gossip. The same energy that makes small towns feel familiar and safe can form a breeding ground for massive drama. After all, if everyone is connected to each other, it's a lot harder to keep a secret.

In a recent Reddit thread commenters shared the darkest and juiciest gossip from their hometowns, and most of these anecdotes should be made into scripts ASAP.

1. L_duo2's school had rules for specific reasons.

"Students were not supposed to leave campus for lunch. Some students were allowed to leave campus. They might be gone for some time.

It turned out they were going with one of the secretaries to the nearby National Guard armory, and were drinking and fucking some of the guardsman. These were 15-17 year old girls.

We did end up on Bill O'Riley for a very brief segment."

2. FizzleProductshizzle's town is adamant about pep rallies.

"At my school, pep rallies happened during the day about once a month. Attendance was absolutely mandatory. I had to get a written note to be excused to work on the set for the school play. Apparently pep rallies used to be optional, until one kid drove off campus during one of them and ended up dying in a crash."

"We had one death while I was there and it was a drunk driver who hit a car and killed a sophomore. There were 4 other people in the car but she wasn’t wearing a seatbelt so she suffered the worst injuries. Her brain wasn’t responding so her parents allowed for her to pass and have her organs donated. The whole school got together and did a big memorial for her.

While I was in high school, there was also a 3 student death at one of the other high schools in the district. Kid crashed his car with his friends inside."

3. Astyyria's town had a very, very bad week.

"5 students and a teacher committed suicide all within a week of each other. The youngest was 8 years old. All cases were unrelated and murders and suicides are very common in my town so our 5,000+ population keeps dropping."

4. MajorMustard's town had morbid major schadenfreude for inconvenienced tourists.

"Several dozen tourists parked their cars on the frozen lake when it wasnt adequately thick ice. Their cars went for an unexpected dip in the lake.

The whole town was talking about it but everyone was split between sympathy for the people and those who thought it was funny that the tourists hadn't thought their parking choice through or bothered to ask a local about the ice."

"It actually made the town a little tense for a while with half the people thinking It was shitty that some locals thought it was funny, which is fair, and the other group thinking it's okay to laugh at the city folk being a bit naive, which is kinda fair too."

5. You don't want to swim in the lake near N0tjolene's town.

"We have a man made lake, three dead bodies floated out of that bitch."

6. toujourspret knows all about true crime.

"I wasn't from there, but I was living in town when the Dee Dee Blancharde case happened: a woman with Munchausen's by proxy medically abused her daughter to convince the community that the daughter had terminal everything. The daughter played along until her internet boyfriend came and butchered the mom. Gypsy Rose is apparently adjusting very well in prison."

7. ConstableBlimeyChips has seen the dark side of the law.

"Some lawyer's wife went missing, there was a big search effort to find her including air force jets flying over the surrounding woods to find recently disturbed ground (indicating a possible burial). They couldn't find her for days until finally a neighbor went to the media to point out the lawyer had remodelled the sitting area in his garden recently including pouring himself a nice big concrete slab right outside his back door the day before he reported his wife missing. Sure enough, they dug up that area and found her body. What was really stupid is the neighbor told this information to the police as soon as he heard the wife was missing, then again two days later, and they did nothing with it until he went to the press."

8. Jeffe3's town also has issues with deadly toxic masculinity.

"We had something kinda like this in our town. We've only got a population of about 300 mostly made up of farmers so this was pretty bad for us. A mom dropped her 3 kids all younger than 15 off at hockey practice and then got a call from her ex husband that he was having mental trouble so she went over to see if he was okay and when she got there he shot her and then shot himself. It was discovered after the kids got done with practice and couldn't get in contact with either of their parents so the coach was taking them home . Both parents were lawyers."

9. awitcheskid lives near some monsters.

"An ex- friend of mine from high school beat his nonverbal autistic 5 year old son to death and hid the body. It will be a year next month and they still haven't found his body."

"He confessed during an interrogation. He recanted his statement later, but he still hasn't been to trial. The mother was there and she might have done it, but he was the one who confessed so he was charged with murder. She was charged with felony neglect and child endangerment."

10. chopsui101 has watched some messy local politics.

"The little town in Oregon I used to live in we had a state rep and state senator who were married and been in their office for 10-15 years (lifers) so it was rare anyone ran against them. Their last election they registered to run and then 15 minutes before the deadline they announced they were dropping out and their friends announced they were running.....effectively ensuring that no one else had a chance to get on the ballot. The reps "claimed" they had no idea....but that state passed the law named after them called the "Whitsett Law" that if a sitting official stepped down it extended the period others could enter to prevent this."

11. BaneOfBeagles' town was a breeding ground for predators.

"We had a substitute teacher who was well liked all over the district get arrested for soliciting sex from a couple 13 year old boys. He seemed like a nice guy, a little weird, but nice. He'd tell us about his nephew who committed suicide because of extreme depression, he'd always cry about it. It came out later that his nephew committed suicide because he raped him. It was really horrible."

12. mcal9909 lives in a town so small that basic theft is drama.

"My neighbor Kevin, his wheely bin was stolen over the weekend. Its been the talk of the village, police have been and taken statements. No further action taken."

13. CaffinatedNevadan's town has farmer drama.

"Some dude didn't pay his grazing fees for like 30 years and had a standoff with the BLM and the FBI."

14. idkm8y's town is home to a very unusual murder.

"A professor from our small community college was shot and killed by his son with a crossbow. Also some highschool wrestlers waterboarded another student, and all they got was a suspension from a wrestling match."

15. recklesschopchop's story is heartbreaking and also terrifying.

"A girl hid her entire pregnancy, all while having her boyfriend at the time try to literally beat her into a miscarriage. She eventually gave birth in her bathroom, hid the baby in her closet then went and had dinner with her mom like nothing happened. She ended up killing the baby, putting it in a duffel bag with a bunch of stones and throwing it in a quarry."

16. Irish_Interests's town is full of the love of Christ.

"It's not really a scandal or a secret but somebody keeps writing "Jesus Loves you" on the main street. I have no idea who it is and it's been going on for a year now."

17. Beneteau45f5's town was built on racism.

"My "town" was incorporated in 1952 in an effort to keep black people out of the neighborhoods and schools. They use zoning laws and property taxes to keep low income housing from ever developing. About 20 minutes away is a city with a lot of gang violence. It has 3x the national murder rate and isn't even a major metropolis."

"The chief of police of this little town was caught selling weapons and bullet proof vests to these gangs. For years. He was also protecting local meth labs. Worst part is, he escaped and no one seems to care.

Edit: Please stop asking me where this is."

18. shiftfive's town has a crimninal with a hot air balloon.

"One guy kidnaps people in hot air balloons. This guy held his kids hostage in a balloon while his wife wanted a divorce, he ran/runs a hot air balloon service."

27 Memes That Will Only Be Funny If You Have A Dog.

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These memes will make you as happy as your dog is when you walk in the door at the end of a long day. Fur babies rule.

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Terry Crews apologizes for claiming children are 'malnourished' without heteronormative parenting.

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Terry Crews is eating his Twitter-words right now. Considering he has since deleted the tweet in question and has taken steps to process the criticism and apologize, he is a former football player turned actor who has already shown more maturity on Twitter than our president.

The tweet in question was about Crews advocating for what seems like both a masculine and feminine energy when raising children. While it seems like he was coming from a place of acceptance, some people took his argument as homophobic, or excluding single parents. I'd like to give Crews the benefit of the doubt and assume that he knows there are plenty of great single and same-sex parents out there that don't fall into the traditional "paternal" and "maternal" roles, but this is a reminder that we should all be careful of what we say on social media. And, if you do make a mistake, have the strength to back down and apologize.

When people began to challenge Crews, he defended himself:

Some agreed:

He began to come around, though:

And eventually took it back:

Terry, good for you for apologizing! I'm sure the internet accepts your apology and that you'll move forward with a more open-minded idea of what it means to be a good parent.

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