Kylie Jenner and her baby daughter Stormi is definitely the cutest part of the Kardashian fever phase.

Stormi doesn't know that she was born into a famous family yet whose popularity is largely because of expert marketing of a sex tape, allowing O.J. Simpson to get away with (probably) murder and a mind-numbing reality show. Stormi is just an adorable baby and her mom is a 21-year-old billionaire makeup tycoon and high key plastic surgery advertisement.

So, when Stormi had her first medical scare, Kylie was reminded of what's important in life. She shared a moving sunset and swing set Instagram story about how blessed she felt.

Eh, I don't know Kylie I feel like you did a little more than wish to become a billionaire but ok...Then, she shared this:

"Spent the day in the hospital with my baby. She had an allergic reaction but is 100% okay now and we are home. Nothing else matters when these happen. God bless all the moms with sick babies. I'm sending so much love and positive energy your way."

Luckily, the emergency was probably nothing a little Benadryl couldn't fix. We're glad that Stormi and Kylie are both safe and sound! Looks like Kylie is totally nailing motherhood. Feel better, Stormi!

Aquaman aka Jason Momoa, aka the ultimate celebrity crush that transcends gender and species, is not here for the senseless maiming of animals, and he made it abundantly known in a recent Instagram post.

Momoa posted his passionate solidarity with animals shortly after influencer Christel Johr Johansen uploaded a video showing two young fishermen on a boat off the coast of Greenland. In the video, the men greet a Greenland shark and brutally hack off its tail before releasing it back into the sea and yelling "Good luck trying to swim, you punk!"

The men in the video are laughing during the whole ordeal, and obviously don't think twice about brutally torturing an endangered species. Well now, the video has gone viral and people are speaking out against this reckless display of animal cruelty.

Undoubtedly, the most outspoken and well known of the naysayers is Aquaman himself, who made his feelings about the fishermen unequivocally known in a recent Instagram post.

He wrote:

"And there you are......it sucks to see that you are probably good men friends providers fathers but you fucking did this. Your life will forever change I have never in my life seen something so cruel. Your laugh makes me furious never have I wanted to hurt a human as much as I did when I heard your laugh and what u said. This will change you and hopefully you will save and protect I pray you find redemption. we all make mistakes but what u did was evil PURE EVIL. You will get what that shark got. FUCK YOU."

Momoa's fans, who are by and by equally horrified, loved seeing Aquaman step up to defend the shark.

The two fishermen in the video are now facing the possibility of jail time or in the very least, a hefty fine. Aquaman stood up for his fellow aquatic brothers and sisters, and it worked.

When hating the President gets me down, aka every waking hour of every day and sometimes in my sleep, I try to find comfort in reminding myself that it could be much, much worse. At least I don't have to hate the president while being married to him. Because that sure seems to be the case for the first lady, whose evident distaste for her husband has been made clear in everything from her facial expression of constant pain, to her rarely being seen with him, to her physically rejecting his attempts at intimacy in very public scenarios.

I try not to feel bad for her, because she did sign up for this. But at the same time, we've all accidentally signed up for something that turned out to be our worst nightmare—like that time I signed up for a month of Crossfit only to realize 5 minutes into the first class that I had made a pact with Satan. Oops!

Today's evidence that Melania is in Hell and knows it comes to us from across the pond, in the UK, where Trump is visiting to bring yet more shame upon the United States of AAAAAHHHHHHmerica. While leaving Airforce One and crossing the tarmac, he attempts to hold Melania's hand and she rejects him with only a smidgen of subtlety:

Twitter, of course, noticed. And people are roasting him for being in a loveless relationship—not only with his country, but also his wife.

We're all wondering that....

This just about sums it up:

I just want to take Melania out for margaritas and give her the ol' "GIRL YOU DO NOT NEED TO PUT UP WITH HIS BULLSH*T ANYMORE! DUMP HIM!!!!" If only she would return my texts. #FreeMelania

In case you thought the Kardashian family was already too much of a messy pop culture telenovela, put on your hazmat suit because it's about to get even more toxic. To recap, The Kardashian-Jenner power tribe is famous for the reality show, "Keeping Up With The Kardashians" where Kris Jenner's daughters sit in their perspective mansions and talk about their glamorous lives, babies, and millions of dollars. The reason they were able to get the show and all the Instagram spon-con that comes with it? Kim Kardashian made a sex tape and re-branded it like a witty wizard of the West coast. Oh, and in the mid-1990's, Rob Kardashian (father of Khloé, Kim, Kourtney, and Rob) lawyer-ed O.J. Simpson's ass out of jail for two murders he is pretty sure Simpson low key definitely did. Ok, now let's dive in.

1. O.J. claims that he and Kris Jenner had sex while on a couple's vacation in the 1990's.

Damn, it's one thing to have an affair but it's another situation entirely to do it while your partners are hanging out in the hotel thinking you're just having a casual nightcap with your friend. This story came out when Simpson admitted it in the new documentary, "Who Killed Nicole?" Spoiler alert: Simpson killed Nicole. Why are we still pretending this is a question like it's "Twin Peaks" and there's a magic murder monster involved? O.J. did it. Case closed.

2. The affair happened in a hot tub. Because, of course it did.

Do Kris and O.J. not know that one of the top ten rules of sex safety is to not engage in intercourse in water? Kris, did you want a urinary tract infection to ruin your vacation on top of ruining your marriage? Hot tubs are puddles of bacteria bubbles, what's wrong with you people?

3. O.J.'s big move was to apparently just take his pants off...

Um, is this a #MeToo situation because now it's starting to sound like it and I'm genuinely worried about Kris. Apparently, after Robert and Nicole turned in for the night, O.J. claims he just pulled his shorts down. Upon seeing his swinging phallus, Kris' eyes reportedly "bugged out of her head." Don't get cocky, O.J., anyone's eyes would bug out of their head if their friend's husband TOOK HIS PANTS OFF while on a vacation WITH HER OWN HUSBAND. The direct quote is that O.J. boasts that "her eyes bugged out of her head and I f*cked that B until I broke her." Wow, what a romantic, poetic description of a night of scandalous love making! Sounds like a modern hot tub fairytale! Just kidding, this is exactly the sort of violent language I would expect from A STRAIGHT UP MURDERER.

4. Before Kim Kardashian's butt broke the internet, O.J. Simpson broke Kris Jenner.

Simpson alleges that his-er-pulsing manhood was so ferocious that Kris Jenner had to be taken to the hospital at around 3 o'clock in the morning. And, here's where it gets extra f*cked up--O.J. ADMITTED that Kris went to O.J.'s room and asked him to take her (because duh, it's his fault) and he said, "No, have Rob do it." WHAT. So. This means that O.J. cheated on his wife with his friend's wife so much that she was injured and then he forced his friend to take his cheating, broken wife to the hospital for a vaginal injury that was O.J.'s fault. Seems like some psychopath behavior...almost like the exact sort of insane behavior of someone who got away with murder and has been living in freedom for years and writing books about how the murder would happen even though he knows HE DID IT? Wild.

5. Now, of course, people think Khloé is O.J. Simpson's daughter.

This might seem like a leap and the years don't exactly match up considering Khloé is 34 and if this hot tub nightmare of a sexual encounter happened in 1990, that would make Khloé 29. However, it might not have been the first time this sort of tryst happened and considering illegitimate children are very en vogue right now thanks to "Game of Thrones," let's explore it.

Unfortunately for the story, but fortunately for Khloé not having a murderer as a father, she took a DNA test awhile back proving she was indeed Robert Kardashian's daughter as her results proved she has middle eastern heritage. Turns out, these rumors have been swirling around for quite some time...

6. Caitlyn Jenner claims that Robert Kardashian knew O.J. was guilty and only decided to defend him because he was still jealous.

Woah. Caitlyn Jenner (formerly Bruce Jenner, an Olympic gold medalist and transgender woman who married Kris Jenner after this disaster vacation fling) claims that Robert Kardashian took O.J.'s case out of jealousy. To indulge this theory, shortly after the hot tub fiasco, both marriages (surprise!) took a turn for the worst. Kris and Rob got divorced in 1991 and the Simpsons split in 1992. While Caitlyn says that she thinks Rob took the case because he was mad that Kris moved on so quickly with another successful athlete, an added layer to this drama cake would be if Rob knew about the affair. Of course, it's pretty petty to choose making your ex and her new husband salty instead of uh, GRANTING JUSTICE TO MURDER VICTIMS. Then again, this is the Kardashian family we're dealing with here. Petty revenge > the law?

So, there you have it! That's everything we know about the O.J.-Kris scandal and I have a feeling it's only going to get crazier. Is O.J. going to claim it was actually his evil twin who injured Kris and will Kris ever wake up from the waking amnesia she's had since 1992? We'll find out when the Kardashian soap opera continues...

While it's hardly surprising that Donald Trump and Meghan Markle are not on the path to a strong friendship, the way it's currently manifesting feels straight out of a reality show.

Trump quickly kicked off his diplomatic visit to the UK with a not so diplomatic interview with The Sun tabloid. During the interview, Trump was asked if he was disappointed to miss Markle (who was away on maternity leave) adding that she was "wasn't so nice" about his presidential campaign.

When Trump claimed to be unaware of Markle's disapproval of his politics, the interviewer revealed the Duchess of Sussex called the reality star "misogynist" and "divisive" and claimed she would move to Canada if he was elected.

To this, Trump simply replied "I didn't realize she was nasty."

Soon after the soundbite started to make the rounds, Trump adamantly claimed he never called Markle nasty, citing the comment as fake news, despite the fact that there is video evidence.

Peopl on Twitter were quick to point out the way Trump's call-out ultimately turned into a self-own.

While it's certainly hard to feel surprised at bonkers denial coming from Trump, people were still deeply impressed by the way these tweets tell on themselves.

This concludes today's installment of: We All Need A Long Nap.

Do you "hate drama"? Then you will hate this thread, started by TV writer Caissie St.Onge. She recently asked Twitter "what is the most dramatic thing you have ever done?"

And surprise, surprise: people on a website literally designed for drama had LOADS of stories to share. Here are some of the most dramatic ones, that will make anyone who "hates drama" grab their glass of Pinot and run screaming from the room. Because deep down, everyone is a drama queen.

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We've all done this, right? RIIIIIIGHT???

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Lol.

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Ummmmm, wow. Don't mess with a Mainer?

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"Primal screams" FTW.

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AND THE WINNER IS:

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[Baby drop]

President Trump is visiting the UK this week. And they clearly don't want him there. England: just like U.S.! Here are the most brilliantly petty ways people across the country are letting our president know they wish he'd crawl back across the pond to the bloody Hell (pronounced "L") from whence he came. God bless these petty queens!

1) RIP John McCain. And me after seeing this.

2) Trump's "welcome" vs. Obama's:

3) Trump's approval rating vs. Obama's.... ON A BUILDING.

4) "Buckingham Palace? Sorry, we're full up!"

5) A message from the Mayor of London:

6) Remember the Trump baby balloon that pissed off Donald so much he once skipped a trip to England? Well, it's back. And bigger than ever! It even has a promo video:

7) Also bigger than ever? This giant penis with a message to a giant penis:

This woman sums it up perfectly:

Cheers to that, mates!

Happy Pride Month! Cities across the world are hosting pride parades and shows and benefits supporting the LGBTQIA community, which is fantastic. Unfortunately, where ever there is a pronounced display of LGBTQTIA pride, there is also a slew of homophobes ready to proudly wave their flags of fear and misinformation.

In cases of religious homophobia, the bigotry is often couched in terms of faux morality and the notion that God (or whatever deity) has specifically designated that sex and romance should only take place between a man and a woman.

The church's obsession with policing the LGBTQIA experience is full of hypocrisies, many of which are all too easy to point out, and it can be deeply satisfying to watch a sanctimonious homophobe go down for their words.

So, when Rhode Island Bishop Thomas Tobin decided to weigh in with a "reminder" that Catholics shouldn't celebrate Pride Month, he got shut down swiftly, and in a beautiful manner.

The frame worthy karma moment started with Tobin's claim that Pride Month promotes a culture that is "contrary to Catholic faith and morals."

It wasn't long before the actor and former wrestler Dave Bautista weighed in with his two cents on Tobin's view.

Bautista fully channeled the loving yet protective vibe of Drax the Destroyer in his tweet extolling his lesbian mom and her active volunteering and compassion for others (which outshines Tobin's claims to religious goodness). He also topped off his call-out by suggesting that Tobin's view does not represent all, or even most Catholics.

This of course brought a lot of joy to his many fans.

A lot of people were quick to point out how the Catholic church has been a breeding ground for abuse, and perhaps bishops would do well to focus on the problems in their own community. Many Catholics also chimed in to say they align themselves with the LGBTQIA community, and they appreciate Bautista not lumping them in with the homophobic church members.

Suffice it to say, Drax the Destroyer is all about Pride Month and not here for Catholic bishops spewing homophobia.

Ope, sorry! Just gonna sneak right past ya with some hilarious memes. As someone who grew up in the Midwest, I can assure you that these bad boys perfectly nail what it's like living the dream in middle America. So grab your corn, ranch dressing, and wicked sense of humor, because these Midwestern memes will leave ya laughing all dang day.

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5. Donald Trump, because his UK state visit is waaaaay smaller than Obama's.

While the United Kingdom is embroiled in its own political crises, the city of London is coming together to tell Donald Trump to feck off.

The President of the United States arrived in the United Kingdom today for an official state visit, and British people (including Prince Harry) are pissed.

Trump was greeted on Air Force One with a view of a giant penis mowed into the grass and an "OI TRUMP." Landscaped by eco-friendly group Born Eco, Trump was also told that climate change is real while flying down the Stansted flightpath.

Trump's fantasy carriage ride with the Queen was also canceled due to the inevitable protest, and he wasn't invited to have a royal sleepover at Buckingham Palace like his predecessors.

The Washington Postreports:

Buckingham Palace is reportedly unable to host the Trumps because of ongoing renovation work that began in 2016. According to the official royal website, Buckingham Palace has 775 rooms, including 52 "Royal and guest bedrooms."

While Trump was in a foreign land, he was greeted with a familiar sight: an empty Mall honoring his arrival.

Trump can't chalk this up to British resentment of the former colonies—President Obama had people excited for his arrival back in 2011.

You know that Trump is bothered by this, because he tweeted about "tremendous crowds."

This is the biggest crowd at Buckingham Palace of all time, period.

Oh, and referring to Brexit as getting "rid of the shackles" is great help. Thanks, lad!

4. Prince Harry, because he looked absolutely miserable greeting the guy who disrespected his wife and mum.

A washed-up TV star who lucked into wealth and power insulted Meghan, Duchess of Sussex in an interview over the weekend.

Back in 2016 when she was just a humble star of Suits, The Artist Formerly Known as Meghan Markle called then-presidential candidate Donald Trump's misogynistic and divisive campaign"misogynist" and "divisive." Meghan also said that she "might move to Canada if Trump was elected president," but instead ended up moving to the United Kingdom, which also provides universal health care.

In an audio recording released by The Sun, Trump said of Meghan, "I didn't know she was nasty," and despite his insistence that he didn't say that, he did, in fact, say that.

Because women have it so easy, Duchess Meghan was spared from having to meet Trump because she's on maternity leave from meet and greets. Prince Harry, however, had to meet the American Wannabe Royal Family because Granny said so.

Royal reporters in the room where it happened described Harry as "noticeably hung back." The prince walked in with Ivanka, who is so very desperate to be considered a princess that she very likely hit on the new dad. After doing his royal duty and escorting her into the room he "drifted off" to talk to a dude called the Lord Chamberlain, who hopefully isn't complicit in kids being kept in camps in Texas.

Prince Harry looks absolutely miserable, and a royal hasn't been this relatable since Princess Diana fangirled over John Travolta.

Trump wasn't just an arse to Prince Harry's wife—he's also said gross things about his mum and sister-in-law Kate Middleton.

The president boasted to Howard Stern on multiple occassions that he could have "nailed" Princess Diana. The last thing she needed was ANOTHER entitled philanderer in her life.

3. Jared Kushner, because he short-circuited when confronted about Trump's racism and was pretty racist himself.

Speaking of princes, Jared Kushner gave a rare on-camera interview to Axios, and his performance demonstrated why he barely gives on-camera interviews. The Kush appeared on Axios on HBO and f*cked up questions on everything from Russian interference and Middle East peace.

When asked if the racist conspiracy theory that the first black president wasn't born in the United States, all Kushie could muster was "I wasn't really involved in that."

Confronted with the fact that the email that begat the notorious 2016 Trump Tower meeting with a Kremlin-connected lawyer had Russia in the subject line, KushBomb said he couldn't read.

The Kushmeister's attempt to defend his actions towards Palestinians was a dehumanizing mess.

He was also callously indifferent towards refugees, even though he loves to use the talking point that his grandparents were refugees to defend Trump from charges of anti-Semitism.

CNN has a listicle of the "29 most eyebrow-raising lines." Slate calls it a "clown show."

No wonder Ivanka is eyeing Prince Harry.

2. The YouTuber who was sentenced to jail for feeding a toothpaste Oreo to a homeless man.

A self-proclaimed "prankster" known as ReSet was found guilty in a Barcelona court of violating the integrity of a homeless man when he replaced the middle of an Oreo with toothpaste.

ReSet must pay 20,000 euros (approximately $22,300) in compensation to his victim, and was handed a 15 month prison sentence.

The New York Times reports, however, that ReSet is unlikely to serve any jail time, because "Spanish law normally allows sentences under two years for first-time offenders in nonviolent crimes to be suspended."

That's lucky—the food in prison is likely to be even worse than toothpaste Oreos.

1. The Florida Man who called 911 to brag about not getting caught at a traffic stop.

Today's Florida Man of the Week is Nicholas Carlmann Jones, who was caught with drugs, fled the scene, and then called 911 to brag about fleeing the scene.

Fox35 reports that Carlmann Jones was cruisin' down St. Augustine Florida with "a jar full of marijuana, THC wax, a small bag containing an unknown white powder, and a dish containing a pink tinted crystal substance."

He then began to run because he thought it would be "fun," and then called the cops to gloat, saying, "what do we pay you guys for? Like I've driven past four cops."

A brave stance on police abolition from an unlikely source.

The 90s were a magical time, folks. If you're lucky enough to remember this bangin' decade, congratulations, these memes are going to be a hilarious walk down memory lane.

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The world is a pretty scary place and nobody gets it more than the internet. We all have at least one pretty unexplainable moment from childhood or recently where a door slam, a shadow, a turning door knob, or a strange voice seems to come out of nowhere. Is it a ghost? We'll never know...

While it's probably unlikely that ghosts exist (don't curse me, spirits!) unsolved mysteries can drive anyone crazy. So, when a recent Reddit user asked, "What is the creepiest thing that’s happened to you?" the internet was ready to share their flashlight-under-the-chin campfire stories with the world. Get ready to shiver, these are truly horrifying...

1. This is terrifying, "danadu1230."

I was at a church girls camp the summer I was 17. I was a youth leader, so I (along with 6 other girls) arrived the night before the main campers. We naturally chose the cabin furthest back from the adult leaders' cabin to sleep in. These old wooden, drafty cabins had log walls, 4 bunk beds, and a mesh screen door with no latch.

That night, I was the last one to fall asleep. I woke up randomly at 1am, looked at the door, and saw the shadow of someone standing directly outside the door. I heard a faint knock, but was too petrified to move. After a few seconds, the shadow moved away. I never fell back asleep.

The next morning, I checked with all the adult leaders - they had done final rounds at 10pm, and had all fallen asleep after that. We were nowhere near the the trail to the bathrooms, and there was no one else on site except the girls in my cabin and the adult leaders.

I tried to brush it off, convincing myself I was imagining things in my sleepiness, and mostly succeeded, until later that night one if the other youth leaders in my cabin piped up and said "umm.. did anyone else see someone standing outside our door last night?"

We slept in a different cabin that night.

2. WTF, "aranboy522."

I was in my living room in my apartment studying for a test 5 in the morning. As I am sitting there in complete silence, I see someone try to open my door and fail.

3. Oh. my. god, "potroast1251."

I was woken up by the sound of someone breaking my bedroom door down. I wear contacts and didnt have them in, but I saw the door bust open and a human was there, and then ran off. I got out of bed, saw my apartment door had been broken down as well, and then discovered the phone lines had been cut.

4. Woah, "PieceofShist."

I forgot that the door to the toilet on the second floor on my house doesn't properly fit the frame and slides open easily. One day when I was home alone, it got really windy and the small window in the toilet was open. The door to the toilet started to move around in the frame and slam open.

I almost shat my pants tbh

5. Ha, "InevitableEducation."

When I was a teenager me, my brother and two of my friends would sneak out in the middle of the night and just bum around. One night around 3am we were cutting through a neighbors yard when we heard this very far away screaming sound. We all stopped for a bit and just listened. It sounded like probably half a mile to a mile away. All of a sudden that screaming sound came from two feet behind us in the grass. We ran like the devil himself was chasing us. It turns out it was just a couple of cats in heat but it didn't make it any less creepy.

6. GTFO, "[deleted]."

One time in a public toilet the person in the cubicle next to me stuck his head under and looked up at me. I didn't really know what to do so I just got the fuck outta there

7. No thank you, "markie719."

Same here. I was going to bed around 3 in the morning, and my apartment at the time only had a deadlock, because the door knob wouldn’t lock. As I’m getting ready to finally sleep, I hear my doorknob turn slowly. I don’t know why, but I yelled something like “Hey!” And the door knob slowly went back into place with some footsteps walking away. It was just creepy.

8. Woah, "uaenaeu."

20F here. I was an Asian tourist in Barcelona, had beer and chips while overlooking the city with one of my best friends. We parted ways by 11:30 PM, and on the way back to my hotel I made eye contact with a man in passing. After a few minutes, I could feel a chill behind my neck, and there he was, following me. When I arrived at a crosswalk I had to stop and wait, and he asked for my name, details, if I wanted to go out for dinner. I was just ignoring him, stuttering and pretending I didn’t speak English or Spanish, and my knees were shivering in so much fear. I kept telling him to go away, and he would, but he kept appearing every street I turned. He tailed me, and I was so scared to make a wrong turn to a dark alley. Luckily came across a group of Spanish aunties and asked them for help because a man was following me, then I ran to my hotel without stopping.

9. Um WTF, "linesicouldntchange."

walking home after closing at work, about 10pm, a guy walks up about 10ft from me, pulls out a disposable camera, snaps a pic of me, and walks away. didnt say a word or even wave at me. was real uncomfy

10. This is terrible, "Shlenb."

I was taking an Uber to my friends house alone. The uber driver was friendly and we were chatting. He told me he thought I was very pretty and liked my eyes. I said thank you and the conversation drifted off. Halfway through the ride I notice he isn’t in the turn lane for a turn he needs to make. There is no alternate route to my friends house so I told him nicely that he needed to make the turn there. Silence.

He passed the turn. Then I asked him to turn around at the next light. More silence.

We were starting to head to a less populated part of my town and I was panicking. I was preparing myself to have to jump out of a moving car. Finally I very loudly and firmly told him to turn the fuck around.

He acted as though he didn’t hear me the first two times, apologized, and turned around. Luckily we were close and the ride wasn’t much longer. When I got out of the car he told me to call him to pick me up later but only if I was drunk. I try to never uber alone now.

11. Was this restaurant the beginning of a horror movie? "pragnar."

...fortune cookie that said:

"Remember, we are always watching."

12. Definitely a ghost, "enigmathere."

This happened when I was about 7 years-old. My parents were both at work, it was summer break, and me and my two older siblings were in the rec room of our house (brother was 11, sister was 13).

We’ve been playing N64 for quite some time. It was mid-afternoon, and my sister decides to go to the kitchen, and runs back to us, and says that the sliding door to the backyard/ deck, was left opened. We’re all freaking-out, and don’t know what to do. My sister then calls my Dad at work, and he comes right away (it’s like a 30 min drive too!) looks around, and nobody is inside the house.

None of us opened the sliding door that day, not even with the screen door on to air out the house. We’re still confused to this day how that happened. There many other creepy moments that I can think of, but this stands out the most.

13. Dear god, "MuhdieKuhh."

Behind the wall next to my bed is free space and this space is linked with our attic and one day I turned in my bed, looked at my white wall and saw something dark red on the other side through a hole I never knew there was.

14. OH MY GOD THIS ONE WINS, "efthesociety."

When I was 10 my room had a window, street view. A homeless man broke in, stole all my blankets that were on me and left. Days later we saw him on the streets with my blankets.

15. Such good dog parents, "-_-Proxy-_-

Parents leave a podcast playing to comfort the puppy while home alone, forgot to tell me. I open the door and hear voices from down the hall, and have a heart attack.

16. Nope nope NOPE, "Flawlessfear."

Sleeping at grandma house (old farm house) when i was 12. Sharing bed with sister. Woke up in the middle of the night. Went to take a piss. While im in the bathroom, sister starts screaming. I go back upstairs to find her sitting on the bed looking at me with a big ass smile. Her eyes looked so black. Then she just went back to sleep like nothing happened. So did i. Then as i was about to fall asleep, the bedroom door just slammed shut with the power of a black hole and woke everybody in the house except my sister. That shit was scary af so i hid under the sheets and fell asleep.

Woke up next morning and talked about it. My sister then tells me that she saw a dark shadow, got scared, screamed then went to sleep with my parents downstairs. At that point i was questioning reality.

I still cant understand what really happened but i sure hope i was having sleep paralysis or something cause whatever i slept next to wasnt my sister

17. AHHHHHH, "The12thman94."

This is a story from a family friend.

When she was a teenager her family and her friend went camping outside of Seattle. There was a single guy staying next to them who seemed pretty nice. Later she and her friend were walking back from a store nearby when the guy pulled up next to them and offered to give them a ride back to the camp. They said they were okay and it made the guy mad. They made it back to the camp but after that the guy started acting weird around them staring at them and they even found him going through the girls tent. It freaked them out enough that they left for another campground. Later they saw the man's picture on TV.... Ted Bundy.

18. Goddamn, "hotairballoons."

A woman I worked with at the Fashion Place Mall in Utah told me that in the 70's, a cute guy asked her out, and they had plans to meet for a date one night. She was only 17, and her mom adamantly refused to let her go because she felt her daughter was too young, and this guy was a little older. 20's or 30's. The woman and her mom had a huge fight over it, it was very dramatic. But in the end, mom won out and she didn't go.

When they were watching the news later, she saw his picture and recognized him. It was Ted Bundy.

19. Definitely should go to the police, "wewantthefunk28."

Oh! I have another one - about a year ago now.

I'm a journalist with a pretty active twitter account. One day I saw that an account with a weird spider picture (I'm arachnophobic) had added me. Its handle was something like "the owls are watching you" - which is kind of a reference to Twin Peaks (one of my favorite shows). Anyway, they started writing pretty innocuous things to me, and only me. Then they added all of my coworkers and people I knew from the journalism scene on twitter. Including people I was friends with but didn't communicate that much with on Twitter. I only freaked out when they wrote some dumb reply to me and I went to their profile again. I found at the top, a picture of me very very drunk. Must have been taken in my early-20s. I had never seen the photo before. It wasn't on any social media I or anyone else I knew had. I don't even know where it was taken. But I know the shirt I'm wearing, I know I was drunk, and I know the general period of time (between 20-23 years old) that it was taken. I even reversed image searched it and nothing. The quote alone with the photo was just: "In vino veritas" (in wine, truth). The account was gone 2 days later.

"Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button."

-Punit Ghadge

Hit the snooze button once or twice, or six times, and then dive into these hilarious memes. It will be the best decision you make all day.

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England really let Trump know that he wasn't welcome there on his most recent trip to the United Kingdom. There's nothing like some good old fashioned, petty-as-hell jokes at the expense of a world leader who much of the world hates.

While the Trump baby balloon did make a comeback and penises with Trump's name written on them were mowed into lawns in the spirit of escalated middle school humor, people seemed to be the most focused on mocking the tuxedo that Trump wore when he met with the Queen.

Trump, did you forget to pack and have to borrow a butler Halloween costume? Did you decide to wear a suit that fit ten years ago and doesn't account for all the fast food you eat now? There are so many problems with this tuxedo it's truly impossible to list them all. He's the supposedly super savvy millionaire businessman president and he doesn't know how to get a tuxedo fitted? Money can't buy class.

While it's not totally fair to ridicule someone for an outfit choice, the way you present yourself says a lot more about how seriously you take your position and if your stomach is busting out of your jacket, maybe you need to reevaluate. As we all learned in "The Devil Wears Prada," fashion is art you live your life in and we hate to break it to you, Trump, this tuxedo is not art.

Of course, now it's a meme...and it's really funny...

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Marlon Wayans is not here for ignorant commenters coming onto his Instagram page to share their small world perspectives about his gay 19-year-old daughter Amai.

Sadly, even in 2019, people remain deeply misinformed about what it means to be LGBTQIA and whether it's a choice or a born identity. There are still lots of children forced to leave their homes or hide their identities from homophobic parents, and there are still whole religious sects that want to determine who you're allowed to love and how you're allowed to express your gender and sexuality.

So, when a public figure is outspoken and supportive of their LGBTQIA family, in this case, Wayans' daughter, the homophobes sometimes feel it's their time to emerge from the shadows and share their very bad takes.

On Monday, Wayans kicked off Pride Month by sharing a photo of Amai alongside a loving and supportive caption.

He wrote:

"Happy Pride to my pride and joy. I wouldn't change one effing thing about you. Love you to the moon around the sun through the galaxies and back again."

For the most part, the thread rolling in was supportive, but there were a handful of extremely ignorant and pointed comments that Wayans felt it his duty to shut down.

There were the classic declarations of unfollowing:

There was a commenter who went off about how "two girls can't make a baby" and being a parent isn't about saying yes to everything (apparently in this case not being homophobic is saying yes too much?!)

Perhaps, even wilder yet was the comment that suggested 19 is too young to know your own sexuality?! Wayans was quick to shut that down.

Another commenter suggested that he delete the negative and homophobic comments to keep the Pride post light and happy, to which Wayans said he believes it's important to leave them up as an example of how a lot of people still think.

While there are sadly still a lot of loud homophobic people sharing their unsolicited opinions on the internet, it's clear that Amai Wayans has a proud and equally loud ally in her father.

A bumbling pack of fools with no discernible skills who lucked into money and power met the British Royal Family this week, and the commoners of the former colonies are not impressed by their so-called princes and princesses.

Despite the official state visit to the United Kingdom because an official state visit, the Trump "kids" (minus Barron) jumped into the opportunity to star in a taxpayer-funded Hallmark movie.

The Trump progeny are getting the royal treatment, meaning, they're being scrutinized by the public for their outfit choices and their inability to stand normally!

The fun started early for Princess Ivanka Trump and her consort Jared "I wasn't really involved in that" Kushner who creeped everybody the F out while they waited for Donald to arrive at Buckingham Palace.

Seriously, this picture is straight out of a horror movie, specifically The Shining.

They look like they're waiting to greet their new handmaid.

Ivanka then added a fascinator to her Nancy Reagan cosplay for a tour of Westminster Abbey, and the consensus is that it was less of a hat and more of a Maxi Pad.

She must have had blood coming out of her wherever.

This was all just build up to the main event: a state dinner at Buckingham Palace, which even Tiffany Trump attended. President Trump wasn't the only one roasted for his white tie look. The next generation looked just as cartoonish.

The Trumps were royal rebes, boasting their lawlessness and taking a picture right in front of a "No Photography" sign.

Don Jr., a private businessman in charge of the Trump Organization and therefore should not be involved in diplomatic trips, was so excited he forgot how to stand.

As awesome as savage tweets are, they're nothing compared to real, live boos.

Ivanka finagled her way into a meeting with the (outgoing) Prime Minister, and was not happily received by the people outside 10 Downing Street. The Londoners booed her as she walked alongside National Security Advisor John Bolton. Fox News insisted that the boos were for Bolton, but it's more likely that the British people on the street recognize the president's daughter-wife.

More like the Boo-K, am I right?

They might be flagrantly getting away with crimes and rubbing it in our faces, but unlike real royals, these jabronis can be voted out.

The Trumps arrived in the UK yesterday. And it seems the entire bloody country came out to "welcome" them with a Trump baby balloon, no red carpet, a whole lot of side eye, and even a giant dick! The display of brilliant pettiness was a sight to behold. This giant USS John McCain baseball cap was the cherry on top:

And if the internet theories are to be believed, the Trump trolling reached royal levels. Last night, the whole Trump family was invited to a state banquet hosted by the Royal Family. The outfit was black tie, prompting a hilarious meme about the President's absurdly over-the-top tuxedo.

But all eyes were on Queen Elizabeth, who is known to be intentional in her outfit choices, choosing her clothing and accessories to convey specific messages.

In keeping with the dress code, she wore a tiara last night. And people did some research into the one that she chose, with delightfully petty results. Turns out, the tiara contains rubies which were a gift from the people of Burma (now Myanmar) and they were intended to protect her against evil.

What a brilliantly petty move, if true. The internet is bowing down.

But that's not all. People think the Queen was also sending a very specific message with her choice of a gift for Trump: the book The Second World War by noted anti-fascist Winston Churchill. People think that's a burn for two reasons: 1) Trump is a fascist, and 2) he's a fascist who doesn't (can't?) read.

This wouldn't be the first time the Queen is rumored to have trolled the U.S. President during his time on British soil. Last year during his visit to the UK, she wore a brooch that was a personal gift to her from the Obamas. YASSSSSS QUEEN.

People on Twitter are asking their boyfriends for "dick appointments" and the responses are beautiful artifacts that should be framed in a museum of relationships. Okay, if we're being honest that might be a bit of an exaggeration, but in the very least the exchanges provide entertaining banter and a peep into other people's relationship dynamics.

The wave of pursued dick appointments was set off when Twitter user baby_b0nes shared a screenshot of an exchange with her boyfriend, and encouraged others to do the same.

The tweet quickly went viral, soon amassing a gorgeous collection of dick appointment documentation, sure to be immortalized in desktop screenshot collections across the country.

The dick appointments are still actively being made, and it's not too late for you to chime in on the thread if you yourself make dick appointments with your significant other. These are just 20 of the funniest exchanges, in my humble opinion.

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Donald Trump is on a state visit to the United Kingdom, much to the United Kingdom's chagrin. Cheeky Brits welcomed the American president with a penis mowed into the grass, petty projections, and protests.

On Tuesday, Londoners gathered in Trafalgar Square, on the path of the presidential motorcade, and Trump may or may not have seen his balloon doppelganger.

Here's what Trump would have seen if he got out of the car.

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I have a confession to make: I’ve seen every episode of Shark Tank. It's beyond a guilty pleasure. It’s taught me, a freelancer with a liberal arts degree, more about business than actually working in the real world.

It’s also influenced the products I buy. And the millions of people also under Shark Tank’s spell may feel that way because the show reflects the way people wish the American dream functioned: that if you work hard, and are determined, a Shark could come in and make your business billions of dollars.

Shark Tank remains one of the consistently best reality shows on television, and that it is a scarily accurate mirror of American society. I have no interest in business (I majored in Theater of all things!) and yet I'm obsessed with Shark Tank.

I can now talk about valuation and equity and all of these words that to me used to feel like utter gibberish because I am weirdly invested in both the sharks and the entrepreneurs. There’s classic reality show editing that we’ve seen since season 1 of The Real World: dramatic music, manufactured arguments, and cliffhangers that throw you to the commercial break where you’ll inevitably be sold medicines with more side effects than benefits.

I’m what the kids would call “cynical AF” and yet, I fully buy into Shark Tank. I don’t have a ton of friends who work in business — unless you count home brewing Kombucha in your Bushwick bathtub as a business — but if I do ever see a business person in the wild, I’m convinced I could throw a lot of Shark Tank verbiage their way as I down a flat, tasteless beer in a bar decorated in generic Irish regalia.

But Shark Tank doesn’t just affect the words I kind of know. I’ve also been so influenced by the show that I’ve bought its products. Shark Tank is effectively, an hour long infomercial, broken up with commercials, but they’ve got me hook, line, and sinker. Its influence probably works for me because every pitch starts out like a commercial: entrepreneurs stand on set and convey why THEIR blanket with sleeves is the best one. When I hear about what the company is valued at, how much money they’ve made, and in what stores they sell the product, these factoids give me confidence in the product.

And once I buy into the cleverly produced story, I also get to know why the entrepreneur thinks the product is so special. If there’s a sob story behind the product, it makes me want it more. Since I started watching the show, I have bought a squatty potty, the simply fit board, scrub daddy, food products, and other items. And honestly? I don’t have anything bad to say about them. Except even if a sponge is smiling at me, I will still be too lazy to change it out every few weeks. Some things about capitalism never change!

Shark Tank teaches kids about entrepreneurship, and acts as a balm for people who work at businesses: maybe a shark will change their luck. But it’s important to consider Shark Tank within the long view of American history. Season 1 took place during the recession and the sharks were the entrepreneurs' last hopes for funding, as it was more difficult to get “regular” business loans. Now that we're out of the recession, entrepreneurs can get millions of dollars of funding just for creating slightly better than average socks. Shark Tank is the funhouse mirror of American consumerism, but I gladly pay the amusement park admission price every Sunday night.

Love Shark Tank? Hate it? Leave us your thoughts in the comment section on Facebook!