If you've worked any customer service job you already know that the general public has no chill whatsoever. People act truly wild when interacting with employees they assume they'll never see again, and few know the depths of this depravity more than hotel workers and pizza delivery people.
In most customer service jobs, workers don't have to find out just how bonkers people act in the privacy of a hotel room, or their own home. But hotel workers and pizza delivery drivers have a special peek into the surprising and often NSFW practices of the most memorable customers.
A recent Reddit thread is full of stories from pizza delivery drivers and hotel employees detailing the scenes they wish they hadn't walked in on.
1. SuplexPanda declined their guest's desires.
A few years ago, the hotel I was working at had a few jacuzzi suits.
This man and woman check in and give a "trashy" vibe from the very beginning. We get through the check-in and everything is fine until a few hours later...
I get a call from the room. The man is clearly intoxicated and begins his rant about how his air conditioning isn't working.
I immediately roll my eyes and groan internally as 9/10 times people have a steaming hot bath and fail to realize that turning on the switch doesn't immediately create a winter wonderland.
This is where I been the general placating to resolve this as easy as possible.
"We don't have maintenance on hand at this time, however, I'd be happy to move you directly across the hall for the night.".
This isn't good enough.
"No! I want you to look at it! That's your job! Come look at it now!"
Well, technically he's right, however, he's drunk and calling someone an idiot when they're sober isn't the most fun experience to begin with.
So, I make my way to his room, knock on the door and he opens the door...
BAM! Blasted by the hot air immediately... who knew?
I immediately knew something wasn't right. The room was completely dark save a few flickering lights. My internal "NOPENOPENOPE" sensors were going off. And then I saw it...
More than a dozen tea lights flickering in the room, a drunk man wearing leopard print undies... I walk inside and make my way to the air-conditioner.
I didn't get too far before I am greeted by a woman on my right. She's friendly and polite... And completely naked on top of the bed.
I retain my professionalism, greeting her and making my way to the air-conditioner. Sure enough, it's working fine, it's warm in the room because of the jacuzzi.
I explain the situation to the man again:.
"Your air conditioning seems to be fine sir. All I can do at this point is move you across the hall."
After some general rambling, the man leans in towards me and whispers in my ear:
"Uh... The general is at half salute tonight... Can you have s*x with my wife for me?".
"While he's explaining this to me, he wife is finding a more comfortable position on the bed... Now legs and vagina spread wide. I politely decline his offer and apologize being the Canadian that I am and return to the front desk and never heard from him for the rest of the month.
The next night I came in I was presented with "How did we do?" card where the comment stated they were very happy with their stay although disappointed I didn't sleep with his wife."
2. Toshhba remembers the moment they decided to quit.
"I was a housekeeper, it was a gross job. I came across used condoms, s*x toys, poo, pee. The final straw came when someone had jacked off and left the load on top of the cover. I went to change the bed sheets and I put my hand right in it. It was a 0/10 definitely wouldn't recommend. I quit soon after."
3. scottevil110 delivered sustenance to an orgy.
"Pizza delivery for 7 years. Fewer than 10 times did I see any noteworthy degree of nudity. Usually women who'd answer the door in a towel or topless, but it wasn't the opening scene to porn that you're picturing."
"But ONCE, I delivered pizza to an orgy in progress. If that's not a 10, I don't know what is, except that I didn't join in."
"There was a guy who ordered the same way every week. "You know who this is, gimme the usual," and then hangs up. His name was Ron, and his usual was a large (14") sausage pizza "burned." Like there's well done, where we make the cheese a uniform brown, but he wanted it further than that. Not literally black dust, but REALLY dark all over. It was always delivery, and he tipped very well.
Our drivers were drivers and order takers only, they didn't work other positions. I worked the oven and would only go on deliveries if we were waayyy behind on orders.
One day in December I get the call from Ron, and I say "I know your address, but I've never been there, is it easy to find?" He replies "It's the one with two reindeer fuckin in the front yard."
"So I'm driving around these cookie cutter townhomes that all look the same, and sure enough, there's one with a decorative reindeer mounting another out front. I walk up to the door, this super-tan Italian guy in a purple robe and leopard print briefs (because his robe was wide open) answers the door, shouts at me "YOU MUST BE NEW! HERE YA GO" and throws a 20 at me (bill was $13, this was in 2001)."
"Only a 2/10 in terms of NSFW stuff, but man that was a memorable delivery. Seeing this man in person who I'd cooked pizza for every week for two years was like seeing a centaur or unicorn.
10/10 as a customer though. Predictable, direct, kept it quick, tipped well."
5. justaboyinaguysbody made a delivery to a woman mid finger blast.
"Used to do bicycle deliveries on the French quarter in New Orleans. Frequently made deliveries to strippers while they’re working. Sometimes you get a little behind the scenes view of the happenings between customers and strippers. Once handed food directly to a stripper while she was getting finger blasted and she proceeded to hand me a tip from her bosom as though nothing was happening."
6. sammayylmao does not miss their old job.
"Probably not what you came here to see but I used to work at the front desk of a crappy (no pun intended) hotel. One day the housekeepers found a room where the occupants had taken a steamy #2 in the tub and turned the heat up to 90 before checking out.
It was not safe to work in there."
7. Egodram hopes the man is okay now.
"I was a housekeeper at a hotel for a few years, I lived in an expensive city so rent was high but the pay covered the basics."
"One day my boss came up to my cart and warned me not to start cleaning a particular room until it was "clear." It's not unheard of for guests to request later check-outs or stay an extra day, but I've never heard someone talk about a cleaning delay in such terms before. Then after 10-ish minutes, a 30-something white male and a paramedic jog over to the room I was warned about."
"I didn't think it was my business to start prodding, but my first thought was "Oh f*ck, dead body." I've heard stories from other hotel staff, it's rare but it happens. This time, the situation was kinda sorta worse than that: Elderly Vietnam Vet rented a room with the sole intention of killing himself, called his son to say "goodbye," and son called for an ambulance. He had already taken a shit-ton of pills, but his body "rejected" them and he'd puked and sh*t all over the room."
"They escorted the elderly man out of the room, there were tears streaming down his cheeks and he wouldn't stop apologizing for the mess. It took 2 hours to clean what I could, we had to call a specialist service in to get the rest. I wasn't angry this time, it was one of the saddest things I'd ever seen: 8 out of 10."
8. turn_n_2 walked in on an unfamiliar tradition.
"I delivered room service at a nice hotel back in 89-90. One night I get a delivery for a bottle of high end scotch to the penthouse suite. Great sale as I get automatic 17% on all orders. So the door opens and I get invited in. There are about 20 young Japanese men in the room and they have one of the guys pinned down on the bed and are wailing away on his bare feet with a shoe. I see this and don't know whether to laugh on call security."
"They see the stunned look on my face and reassure me that this is a bachelor party tradition where they are from. Sounds reasonable to me, so I go about my way. On my way out several of the guys discreetly slid 10's and 20's into my hand as tips. After a couple more deliveries that night, I walked with over $250 from that room alone. 10-10 would recommend."
9. llamamama03 has too many stories to narrow down.
"I worked front desk for a small hotel in a small town that had 8 of those “fantasy suites,” where the rooms were designed to look like different things. Igloo, cave, casino, honeymoon suite, etc."
"There was so much NSFW stuff going on there that the housekeepers just told me to lie to myself when I was doing the laundry. Blood on the middle of the sheet? Clearly someone had a nosebleed. Unidentifiable stain? Had to be a food spill."
"It was the only way to get through the days. Thank goodness I never worked third shift. Those are the employees that dealt with the most NSFW stuff, mostly thanks to “noise” complaints."
10. Korvon got followed by crazed customers.
"Posted before, but fits...
Delivered pizza in Washington State back around 15 years ago and had several odd experiences. Most bizarre one I can remember I was delivering several pizzas to a house which came to a total of about $36. I walk up to the house knock on the door and a little kid answers the door. He hands me $40 takes the pizzas and closes the door. I stood there for a moment and just figured they were giving me the rest as a tip and the parents were too lazy to get off the couch."
"Im almost back at my car and I hear "HEY PIZZA GUY GET BACK HERE!" I turn around and see crazy looking blonde lady in the door in a towel. I walk back and she starts into a rant about how I was trying to steal money from her kid! I explain to her that I just thought they were giving me the money as a tip, and if that was an issue, they can have it back. I gave her the $4 back and after a bit more talking she ended up giving me $2 as a tip. Not that great, but better than having a pissed off customer. Thinking all was cool I headed back to the shop."
"When I get back at the shop, my friend who was managing the shop was on the phone looking a bit pissed. I walk in and he gets off the phone and explains that was the customer yelling at him about my behavior. I explain what happened, and we both figure they were crazy and continue on with the day."
"Fast forward 20 min, I have another order to take and I am putting more pizzas in my car. I go to leave but there is this big ass pickup truck in the way. I go to the driver and ask if they could move since I have pizzas to deliver. The driver responds "Why so you could rip more people off!!??" I look closer and in the passenger seat is the crazy lady now with crazy boyfriend driving."
"I go back into the shop and tell my buddy "Crazy people here to see us!" My friend being the hilarious guy he is, grabs paper and a pen, and walks outside very obviously writes down the guys license plate, and heads back inside. Then proceeds to call the cops."
"Shortly after that they take off, but tried to follow me most of the night, but found it hard in their oversized redneck truck and me in a little sporty pizza mobile.
TL;DR Dont deliver to Crazy. 4/10"
11. happycamal7 didn't get tipped by the kissing cousins.
"Pizza delivery to a residency, receipt says “deliver to set”. Now, I’ve been on a few student film sets before and I have a pretty good layman’s idea of the way things work, so I thought I’d ask what they were filming inside.
“It’s this movie about these two cousins who f*ck each other.”
They did not tip me."
12. tankerawsome's friend wasn't down.
"A friend of mine works at a hotel. This guy called the front desk asking if they could fix the heater, which is a very common request even though they are very easy to operate. She went up to his room and when she got there he had hand cuffed himself to the bed and was naked. Guess he was confident she would go for him cuz he didn't have the key. She left him there, with no key, but naked and didn't close the door all the way."
"The most NSFW delivery I ever did was deliver to a couple in a hotel. The woman answered and paid wearing only panties and a tight-fitting t-shirt, and her chest was ginormous, then she tipped $10. Due to how close this hotel was to the shop, that's basically a 10/10 delivery."
14. amaezingjew wants people to put on clothes, please.
"I use to work in a hotel as the front desk supervisor."
Please don’t answer the door in a towel. Ask us to wait if you need to throw on some clothes real quick. I can’t tell you how many times I’d brought something up to a room, the person answered the door in a towel, and then accidentally dropped some or all of the towel reaching for whatever I’ve brought them.
Please...please put some clothes on...:
15. Inevitable_Professor wasn't into the women at the apartment complex.
"Was one of two maintenance men at an apartment complex. Thankfully, two older, trashy women preferred the other guy. They would wear old worn out lacy things every time he was scheduled to be in their unit for repairs. They were also borderline hoarders."
16. zackowea will never forget the man from Spain.
"I worked a few months at a 5 star hotel here in Chile back in 2016, since i speak English i worked as a receptionist and had to deal with a variety of guests from tourist to businessmen. A common thing to deal with was prostitutes who came to see business men (this hotel is near the costanera center building in santiago so we had businesses and other hotels around) Prostitution is illegal but we can't assume every girl or boy who comes asking for a specific room is a prostitute, however we can suspect and for that we used the internal "code Charlie" (we took their info and kept their id in the reception in case something happens)."
It was like my second month there when a man came from Spain and took one room with a king size bed and paid for three days"
"Not even an hour after he arrived a Charlie shows up 19 y/o girl blond and green eyes I took her info and id then she went on her way
About half an hour later another one shows up 21 y/o short and tan latina girl asking for the same room."
"One we can turn a blind eye and move on Two and we start to worry
Still i take info and id then on her way to her Spanish conquistador
We had to kick the guy out when one of my colleagues let in a third Charlie and didn't realize was for the same room."
"This time a 18 y/o thin and pale boy with a moonstone necklace
We got 5 noise complaints after the boy arrived amd according to the guards who went to kick him out the four of them were completely naked and caught a glimpse of the boy's gaping a*shole while the first girl snorted a line of cocaine."
"We had to call the cops and i had to give a statement to them as to why would we allow 3 people into his room
For months we kept talking about this incident with the maids who had to deal with the stains of this guys 3 hour stay"
17. Drakesward got tipped in a scary way.
"Worked at Domino's. A guy waved me into his apartment with a gun. Shut the door. Then he just tipped me and I left. As if it was the most casual thing in the world.
Maybe he was cleaning it or something when I knocked? Still weird."
18. shartnado3 wishes they'd had longer to gaze.
"I delivered pizza for 5 years. Seen a lot of boobs, people in the middle of having sex, drugs etc. The one that sticks out was a very attractive lady coming to the door, after her bf goes to get her, wearing the most see through lingerie I have ever seen. She might as well have been naked. It stands out because of how d*mn attractive she was, and how she just stood there for a long time letting me soak it all in. I think they got off on that stuff, and I am super pissed I got the order right and didn't forget anything, lol."
19. coltraneb33 will never forget the sh*t couple.
"The worst one for me was at a high end Inn. Couple was staying 2 nights, walked in to clean after the first night. Literal sh*t everywhere. Arm and leg restraints were on the bed, huge box of s*x toys beside the bed and in the jacuzzi tub, all sh*t covered. Sh*t on all the towels, sheets covered in sh*t, walls everything. I was 8 months pregnant, and noped out of there."
"As I was walking out to tell my supervisor I was not going to clean it they walked in and acted like there wasn't shit everywhere. Work conferences at that In always had one person who would take a dump in the middle of the bathroom floor."
20. spiderborland had an interesting training.
"I was being trained to do the night audit. The audit is a pretty dead shift with a LOT of downtime. We'd done the basics and now were just hanging out in the lobby. We're watching TV when my trainer points past me and says, "That dude's naked." Nope. Not turning around. Not even going to pretend to be interested. Nope."
"He gets up and rushes over to the front desk. I finally turn around and see a completely naked man. "How can I help you, sir?" "I f*cked up." "Yes it seems you did." He'd done the classic set something outside your door and it closes behind you, locking the naked person in the hallway."