Teachers have a great deal of control over the future adults of the world. Unfortunately, sometimes they can give out the wrong information, whether it's by accident or not.

From Pluto's status to the availability of calculators in the wild, here are 12 things people learned in school that turned out to be false.

1. There's no such thing as a "permanent record."

That there would a "permanent record" of anything that we did wrong (in primary school, at least; I know universities will absolutely fuck you up if you're stupid enough to plagiarize). - Medical-Seaweed

2. This has apparently been disproven since the '70s.

The "tongue map" (link), where certain tastes were believed to only be detectable on certain parts of the tongue. Absolutely untrue. Plus the realization of a 5th taste (umami). - PSquared1234

3. The thing about solids is that they're not liquids.

I was taught that glass is actually a very dense liquid, and this is proven by old glass panes being thicker at one end. It's just flowing extremely slowly, you see.

But it's really just that glass was made differently back then. Glass is solid. - seventeenblackbirds

4. At least this person learned something useful thanks to this age-old academic scare tactic.

By 1980, the US will have fully abandoned the imperial system for the metric system. This was the fall of '77. We had to learn how to do all the metric conversions. - Franklin19697000

5. Demonizing tradesmen is an interesting educational choice.

my father was an electrician who worked for the county school board. He told me about how one day while on the job sometime during the mid-late 90’s, he was working on a panel in some middle school when a teacher pulled aside and asked him a for a favour. He accepted, and she brought him into her classroom. She then proceeded to tell the class that they better buckle down and study and get into a good university, because if they didn’t, they’d wind up having to get a trade and be a “loser” like my father, all the while pointing at him. Awfulness of this teacher aside, it was really stupid of her to say that traded are worthless. I know guys who are carpenters, electricians, pipe fitters, etc. that make more money than most teachers do. - Wambolt90

6. Yeah, this backfired...

You will never have a calculator by your side at all times while not at home. - Throw_A_Stone

7. This toilet-flushing fact is making my brain swirl.

That the Coriolis effect is demonstrated by toilets flushing the other way in Australia.

In reality, toilets flushing whatever way they flush is based on how the water is directed in the bowl. The Coriolis effect is only seen in large systems such as hurricanes. - ajmomoho

8. Pluto had a bad few years.

That there are nine planets orbiting our Sun.

I STILL LOVE YOU, PLUTO! - SpreadingRumors

9. This is a big fat Yikes.

Went to school in south Alabama, was taught an extremely skewed version of the Civil War. - Zip_Zoopity_Boop

10. What moisture?!?!

My HS wellness teacher told us - and I quote - if you squeeze all the moisture from a cigarette into your hand, and lick it, you will die instantly. - herpty_derpty

11. Well now PEMDAS is ruined.

PEMDAS. My 7th grade math teacher taught us the order of operations explicitly that multiplication was always before division, not that they had equal weight. I finally learned the correct way about three years ago in one of those "a zillion people can't get this math problem right" when someone was kind enough to explain why I was wrong instead of just calling me stupid. Three years ago I was 31, so I spent like 20 years with an entirely wrong method of one of the most basic fundamentals. I sometimes wonder how much this contributed to my disdain for math and my struggles to do well in math classes. - cheetah7985

12. This one is the biggest fallacy of all.

You need good grades to get a good job to have a safe and secured life. - OrangeyDragon

Wake up and smell the memes! This list is coming to you hot and fresh and ready to make you laugh 'til coffee squirts out your nose. Actually that sounds pretty painful. Maybe stick to orange juice for now.

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Planes are safer than cars, right?

People fly so frequently that it has become something we take for granted when actually we are suspended in air inside a metal tube. Planes are really a wonder of human engineering if you think about them too much. And, while plane crashes do happen very rarely, what about the mid-flight problems that don't end in tragedy? It's probably best to just surrender to not knowing about the potential disasters while throwing back a mini bottle of plane wine and a rom-com that came out in 2004.

When a recent Reddit user asked, "Pilots/Flight Crews of Reddit, what went wrong on your flight that the passengers never knew about?" sky-experts everywhere were ready to weigh in. Word to the wise: don't read this one before you're about to get on plane...

1. Flying ducks! "RedditGotWings."

A colleague of mine was flying with a Captain who couldn't stop giggling since he got onboard his 737. Only when they were cruising that the Captain took out a yellow live baby duck from his flight bag. Couldn't believe the story but the dude recorded a video of the little duck chilling in the sun on top of the mode control panel!

2. Stop trying to join the mile-high club! "normanlee."

Girlfriend is a flight attendant, so I asked her for a few stories.

1. Upon landing, one of the tires blew out. It pretty much just resulted in a bigger jolt than usual, and although a few passengers commented on it, the crew just played it off as a more or less regular landing. Girlfriend: "What are you gonna do, tell everybody a tire just blew and get them all panicked?"

2. At least once a week, there's an armed, plainclothes federal air marshal riding on the plane, usually in first class. They're there as a security measure, in case the cockpit is breached or something. Even if people are aware that air marshals are a thing (usually portrayed in Hollywood as escorting a criminal), they don't realize the frequency with which the marshals ride along on planes.

3. A guy on the plane was from a connecting flight from a Eurasian airline, with a boarding pass under some other woman's name. The woman happened to be on the flight as well, so he obviously didn't belong. The guy could've stayed if he had just gone through TSA again, but he refused to go through the process and was very strongly insistent on talking to the captain directly (big red flag right there). No idea what the real story was--she believes that it was a foiled terrorism attempt--but the crew treated it as a simple duplicate boarding pass problem. Again, the problem was dealt with and you don't want to unnecessarily worry the passengers.

4. A lot of people try to join the mile-high club. Like, a lot.

3. Ha, "[deleted].

My dad had a wasp in the cockpit with him once, he said his first thought when he noticed it right after taking off was "oh, so this is how I die"

4. Gross! "MayDaze."

Cockroach in the cockpit. Redeye from LAX. One of us was strapped in while the other one hunted for the little fucker.

5. Definitely a good move, "Whatsupwiththizat."

I was flying a Piper Navajo that seats 8 passengers out of a small airport, we were making all of our required radio calls, but because this was a small uncontrolled airport some people in small airplanes will operate without radios or just don't care enough to broadcast their position. Anyway we were doing our due diligence but not long after take off and while leaving the traffic pattern my FO says "shit!" And takes control from me and make a relatively aggressive (for passengers at least) turn to the right. As he does this i see a cessna out my left window no more that 150 ft below us. We essentially climbed through the altitude he was cruising at and turned to avoid him. Only one passenger noticed when we got to the destination and he told us it was a "good move".

6. Hawks are strong, "deckle420."

It was a flight from Kansas to Oregon, and as we were mid-flight, a hawk fucking dive-bombed the wing and DENTED it. The pilot announced the subtle thud as minor turbulence, but the crew knew what had happened. No one knew how the hell the hawk was flying so high. It was a smaller plane, so we only had one and a half dozen people(not counting us crew members). The dent didn't actually meds with flight too much, but it's a hell of a story to tell.

7. This is terrifying, "Kdog0073."

I was giving my sister and a friend a tour of the Chicago skyline over Lake Michigan. We are all having a good time. Suddenly, the engine goes quiet... a nightmare especially because I only have one of them. The silence was noticeable and my sister starts looks at me and starts to panic. The engine comes back within about 3 seconds alive and well, and I head for the nearest airport.

In a small propeller plane, it is hard to hide the silence of the engine, but since it came back, I acted like nothing happened. I don't think they realize how critical of a situation it almost was.

8. Damn, "Scubamane."

Landed on the wrong runway. (it was night time, and tower didn't inform me of my misjudgment until less than 1/4 mile away.) I was a young Private pilot and had a few passengers, so it wasn't too big of a deal

9. Scary! "missem_90."

Former flight attendant here. I lived through 2 different total engine failures. That were never announced to the Passengers. Turns out one was because the aircraft mechanics had left a screwdriver in the engine. The other I never learned why.

And a few times we had to declare fuel emergencies. Meaning that the plane almost didn't have enough fuel to land correctly.

10. Wow, "tillerman35."

I took a bunch of friends up at night to see the city lights. Unfortunately, the PCL (pilot controlled lights) of my home airport (a tiny little airstrip, really- but they did have runway lights!) decided that was the night they weren't going to work. The airstrip was in the middle of a decent sized patch of woods & really only identifiable by the absence of light on a moonless overcast night like that one. Which made it totally impossible to find. Effectively, I was lost in mid-air! I knew the airport's bearings from two VORs (radio navigation aids), so theoretically if I went to the intersection of the two compass headings, I should be able to see my airport directly beneath me. But when I did, it was still so damn dark that the ground might as well have been invisible.

I had plenty of gas, and there were three or four airports in the area that I could have gone to. But it would have been embarrassing as fuck to have to catch a cab back to where we'd left our car. So I criss-crossed the area a few times at low altitude with the landing lights on. To eliminate all glare, I turned off all the interior lights, leaving my passengers in the dark without explanation.

Finally, I caught just the barest glimpse of the runway & took a mental picture of the setup. I flew an abbreviated landing pattern & lined up for final. The landing lights showed me as being slightly off, so I slid left every so little and then set her down nice and easy.

I turned to look at my friends. They were as white as sheets. To them, it had been so completely dark that they didn't know whether they were 10 feet or 1,000 feet above the ground. They had no idea why I'd turned off all the lights and pulled power from the engine, and the bump of landing came as a total surprise.

I laughed it off and said that I'd gotten lots of practice landing at airports with no lights back when I used to run drugs across the Mexican border. For the longest time, I think they actually believed me!

11. This is reassuring, "CorgiButter."

I fly giant airlines as well so here is my take.

Had a flight control failure over the ocean. Autopilot and autothrottles disconnected but after rubbing checklists for nearly an hour we were able to correct it and get them back, avoiding a non-standard configuration landing.

Another incident over the south China sea. Blew a pressurization valve and had to make an emergency return to Japan. We landed and I guess some passengers didn't really notice. Many were surprised to wake up back in Japan. I guess we should have expressed that emergency notification a little better.

Someone mentioned redundancy. This is true. Our aircraft has quite a few. Very often we get random issues that make us keep an eye on them but nothing too serious.

For the most part if something is wrong enough to be serious, the passengers will know eventually. If it's nothing too serious then there's no point in anyone else knowing. Flying is pretty safe.

12. What! "Pilot-Panda."

We were struck by lightning (twice) in a small computer turbine and ended up writing off the engine due to magnetization.

I advertently climbed into a storm low level. Hardly any turbulence like you'd expect and other than engine parameters dropping off for a split second nothing else was amiss.

13. NOPE NOPE NOPE, "hotcakesinmytummy."

I was flying myself and 2 friends in a near new C172 hired from my flying school I was training at. We were doing a 1 hour scenic flight and I was step climbing through 1000ft increments to 4000ft. Everytime i would nose down at the 1000ft mark to check for traffic and let the trim bring the nose back up again the engine would run rough, cough a couple of times and keep going ok after that. I ended up leveling at 4000, cut the trip short and turned for home. It was fine on the way back in and the landing was uneventful, however it was coughing at low rpm at taxi.

I informed the mechanic and the next week he advised me the fuel filter was so clogged with sediment it had been pushed into a valve and everytime I climbed it restricted the fuel flow. He reckoned any higher than 4000ft and it likely would have stopped completely and with no readily accessible landing spots close by it would have been interesting.

Not as exciting as some on here but I still shit my pants. Passengers were none the wiser.

14. This is lucky, "Wise-Old-Man."

I was flying my stepdaughter back to her mother's, a city about 80 miles away, in a Cessna 172. It was semi-stormy but I really wanted to fly and being young...er, a very inexperienced pilot (less than 80 hours at the time) and pretty foolish, we went anyway. My girlfriend came along too.

We got about 30 miles in to the flight and ran in to a cloud bank. In the mountains. I am thinking “Hmmm, we can fly through this to clearness I am SURE is only a little bit away”. So we fly in to the cloud and in to zero visibility. My first time in zero vis. As a pilot. All the experienced pilots here know what happened in the following minutes and they are rolling their eyes and shaking their collective heads.

We are cruising along and I am hoping to see some clearing out ahead soon. I casually check the instruments because that's what one should do when one is flying blind and I notice we are in a steep climb and losing speed rapidly. In my mind I am thinking “HOLY SHIT!!!!!” but I try to remain clam and get the plane back in to level flight again. While doing this I am thinking to myself “Wow. You really can't tell by feel what altitude your plane is in when you are in a zero visibility situation”.

I decide it just might be a good idea to turn around and get out of this mess before something really bad happens. I put the plane in to a gentle level turn to head back the way we came. I am keeping an eye out for obstacles like mountain sides and trees. About half way through the turn I check the instruments again. HOLY SHIT!!! I have one wing pointed to the ground and I am losing altitude at a prodigious rate. I level the plane back out ….. again... and fly with my eyes pretty much glued to the instruments to keep the plane flying the way I THINK it's flying with the occasional brief check for mountainsides and such.

We finally exit the cloud and I tell the girls we should probably head back because I don't think we can safely get to our destination given the current weather conditions. They were completely clueless the whole time of the danger I had stupidly put us in. Many unforgettable lessons were learned that day.

We all know about dad jokes, the endless puns and embarrassing turns of phrase that cause kids to cringe and whole barbecues full of friends to roll their eyes. Dad jokes are both a staple trope, and a staple reality abounding in the homes and spaces where dads roam free and wild.

While dad jokes deserve their due shine, they often overshadow other traits dads bring to the table - like the ability to create an absurd parenting hack just so they can sip a stout while having baby time, or finding ways to nap that benefit both father and child.

Since most parents could use a few extra hacks in their tool belt, I've gathered 20 dad hacks that I think deserve honorable mentions.

1. This dad with liquid priorities.

2. This dad keeping safety at the forefront.

3. This dad who knows bathwater can clean the kid AND prep the bacon.

4. The dad committed to appreciating his daughter's Instagram presence.

5. This dad with a flair for the artistic.

6. The dad with inventive ways to cool down food.

7. This dad who cosplayed as a Mad Max character to embarrass his daughter.

8. This dad's alternative bottle warmer.

9. This dad's new method of preparing eggs.

10. This dad's creative way to take a nap.

11. This dad who knows the staying power of duct tape.

12. This dad trying to give his son a memorable first day of school.

13. This dad who used the bottle warmer for his cup of joe.

14. This dad, ready with fresh embarrassment for his son.

15. This dad's version of a hair tie.

16. This dad's deodorant costume.

17. This dad's pairing of beer and baby.

18. This dad who used a baby carrier as a sun hat.

19. This dad who matches the train.

20. This dad who found a woman who matches his level of extra.

Trump's weird, all-caps handwritten note has, of course, already become a meme.

President Trump was showing off his cue card while waving it around in his address about the impeachment testimony from Gordon Sondland. Apparently this was meant to be the final word on the impeachment inquiry, but a final word usually means more than just a declaration that it's the final word...

It reads like a strange, sharpie-written beat poem and watching him "perform" it is an entirely different experience. Shouting "I want nothing" twice is an interesting approach from someone who clearly has a lot of wants. Also, doth the Trump protest too much? "I want no quid pro quo." Seems a little sketchy. Still, Trump claimed Sondland has cleared him of using his office to force Ukraine to find harmful information about his opponent Joe Biden by testifying that Trump said, "I want nothing."

Regardless, the impeachment process is long and complicated so if you need a break, here are some Trump cue card memes for some relief!

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Supporting a friend's relationship can be tough when you have different philosophies about love, gender, and power dynamics. Ideally, everyone will love each other's partners and you can support your friend's relationships honestly. But differences of opinion can easily crop up, which presents the question of whether it's best to keep your mouth shut or speak your piece.

In most cases, it's best to make your opinion known before you commit to being in someone's wedding, but life isn't always that cut and dry.

In a recent post on the Am I The A*shole subreddit, a woman asked if she's wrong for confronting her bride-to-be BFF about relationship hypocrisy right before the wedding.

AITA for calling out my best friend's hypocrisy right before her wedding?

OP kicked off the post by sharing that she's going to be in her friend Becca's wedding in a couple days.

Coincidentally, OP's boyfriend also proposed a few days ago - making their wedding time frames relatively close.

I am maid of honor for my best friend Becca and the wedding is in a few days. Coincidentally, my boyfriend Tom proposed to me a few days ago. I asked Becca if she'd like to be my maid of honour, and she refused on a ''matter of principle''.

However, despite their closeness, OP shared that Becca is adamantly against her relationship because her fiance Tom is younger and less moneyed.

Becca is a lovely person, but she has extremely traditional views. Her fiance is a lovely man, but is 10 years older than her (her and I are both 30), very handsome, and probably earns about 5x as much as she does. Becca is very much a ''date up not down'' sort of woman. I have no problem with this at all. Tom, meanwhile, is 6 years younger than me. Gorgeous and makes a decent income, but I still out earn him considerably.

Since the dawn of OP's relationship, Becca has made it very clear that she disapproves because they don't fit into "traditional gender roles."

Ever since Tom and I have been dating, Becca has constantly (and LOUDLY) voiced her disapproval. To her an older woman and a younger man is ''unnatural'' and a woman shouldn't earn more than her husband as he is supposed to be the ''provider''.

Needless to say, when OP announced her engagement at Becca's wedding planning session, Becca made it crystal clear she wouldn't accept the role of maid of honor because it's a "matter of principle."

I announced my engagement at our wedding planning session yesterday evening, and asked Becca if she'd like the Maid of Honour job. She refused which I respect, but without my asking gave her reason: That she doesn't support me marrying Tom and never will.

OP became angry and called out Becca for her hypocrisy before storming out.

I was furious and called her out on her hypocrisy. She tried to get in her usual ''but it's DIFFERENT when the guy is older'' but I didn't want to hear it. I stormed out in tears.

Tom is the most lovely guy I've ever met. He treats me like a princess, makes me feel like the most special person in the world. For years now I've bit my tongue as Becca spits her vile views in my face, and I'm sick of it. She humiliated me in front of the entire bridal party.

Since the fight happened so soon before Becca's wedding, OP is now unsure where this leaves them.

I'm not sure where this leaves the wedding now. I will always be Becca's friend and want to be there on her big day, so I don't know if I chose a bad time to confront her on her behaviour.

OthrMothr22402 thinks Becca's views suck but OP's lack of backbone when it comes to her partner also sucks.

ESH - you for allowing your friend to constantly badmouth your SO and not stick up for him or shut her down and then turn around and ask her to be instrumental in your wedding. Becca for being a sexist piece of trash.

zukka924 thinks that OP should dip out of Becca's wedding.

NTA Becca f*cking sucks. Honestly I would consider dropping out of her wedding if I were you. But that's just me!

Anyways, CONGRATS ON GETTING ENGAGED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YourFeelsMatterNot thinks it's bonkers that OP even wanted Becca in the wedding.

ESH

Her for obvious reasons.

You for putting up with this. Why would you even ask her to be Maid of Honour? She clearly has disdain for your partner, if she can't support you in your relationship then why have her there at all?

CatelynsCorpse thinks OP needs to seriously sort out who she prioritizes in her life.

ESH except for Tom and maybe Becca's future husband, too.

I don't know where the hell she gets off trying to tell you who you should and shouldn't date. Her opinions on relationships are backwards and old-fashioned, but she's (unfortunately) allowed to think that way. What she is not allowed to do is shit all over her friend and her friend's choice of a partner...so why do you put up with that shit? Who you date/marry is YOUR choice. Honestly, Becca is NOT a good friend to you, full stop.

You suck, too, though, for not only tolerating this shit from her but also for asking her to be your Maid of Honor when she disrespects your fiancee and bashes your relationship. Why would you want someone who disrespects your partner to be a part of the most important day of both of your lives? That makes no sense whatsoever, and it's really not fair to Tom, either.

Personally, I think Becca sounds toxic AF and am not really sure why you want to.

Hopefully this thread full of concerned strangers serves as a wake up call to OP that Becca is in fact not a friend, but a toxic waste of energy.

The holidays can be a strange time if you're related to someone you don't get along with. Maybe they're not a blood relative, but an in-law or a family friend who got into it with you one too many times, no matter the connection, gifting someone you're not genuinely close to can feel like a minefield.

While there is certainly the option to protest by not gifting them in the first place, that gives them the satisfaction of directly confronting your seething hostility. A more strategic and cunning move is to buy (or make) them a gift that will communicate distaste, but with enough subtlety they have a hard time kicking back. This is holiday psychological warfare 101.

In a recent Reddit thread, people shared their passive aggressive gift ideas (and anecdotes) that are a must-have for anyone with beef to spill at the table.

1. llcucf80 has a deliciously petty idea.

Gift card with a very low amount to an extremely expensive store (like Saks Fifth Ave). Maybe $5 worth.

2. Wndrwmn8901 is not here to play.

A puzzle but you open it first and remove a piece then glue the box back together.

3. MysticMom16 knows the power of the written word.

A book about being a better person.

4. Artemiseus is full of gorgeous evil ideas.

Tickets to something that's only available during a time they can't/won't go. A massage at a place that's 2 hours away. A magazine subscription to something they definitely don't care about. Sponsorship for an animal at a zoo/sanctuary (your money goes towards something good for a good cause and the person doesn't get anything but their name on something maybe), donate to a cause in their name towards something they don't care for or support, a cactus, cheap socks, an obviously boring book (like statistics or the history of potato peelers) a framed picture of you and your spouse (with your spouse very happy) (I understand this is for your MIL?) something she's too old or young for.

On the "beef" theme, Tillamook is a ranch with milk cows. You can sponsor and name a cow for pretty cheap. Name one after her.

5. Qkddxksthsuseks knows how to make sh*t hit the fan.

Haribo sugar free gummy bears. It has a rep for having a laxative effect on people who eat it. For the unsuspecting it will be very surprising.

6. twistedsister78 knows how to make the wrapping count.

Not a gift but every year for the last ten or more maybe- I have wrapped gifts to my mother and sister in paper that says Ho all over it, I buy ho ho ho paper when I see it and they have never picked up on it. Stupid I know but I get a secret giggle by secretly calling them a ho.

7. Stri-Daddy knows how to maximize the card experience.

Confetti explosion Christmas\birthday card.

8. krkr8m knows how to play the subtlety.

An accessory for something they don't own.

9. thattiredgradstudent's friend received a top-of-the-line passive aggressive gift from their mom.

My progressive friend was in law school for environmental law when his (very conservative) mom got him an autobiography of Antonin Scalia for Christmas.

10. grotesqueteaspoon thinks the wrong shirt could do the trick.

Clothes that are either way too big or way too small for them.

11. zinn7's grandma has no mercy.

I don't know if this is passive... But my grandmother once got a family friend a mirror for Christmas. When he opened it up and looked puzzled, she said "It's so you can see how ugly you are." She was dead serious.

12. MrBnDaBois thinks you gotta go big or go home.

A gift card to their favorite restaurant but it doesn’t have anything on it. That way hits them when they have to foot the bill and you can play if off as a “Oh no, what!?”

13. HasetsuKankouKyokai has it all figured out.

This is specifically for nasty MILs.

Get them a self help book relating to some fault that they see in you. Do they think you are cluttered? Get them a book on how to mindfully declutter their homes. Do they think you're argumentative? Get them a book about how to talk to people constructively. Do they think you're not good enough for their child? Get them a book about how to "let go" of loved ones.

It sends the message that you understand that someone in your relationship needs to fix themselves, and *big wink* it's her.

14. outoftouch49 thinks killing with kindness is the best route.

The best thing you can do is get them something extremely thoughtful and nice. It will absolutely destroy them because they either have to admit they may be wrong about you or convince themselves that they hate the gift.

15. Black_Bud goes the hygiene route.

A lovely gift basket with soap, deodorant, shampoo, conditioner, an exfoliator, hairbrush, toothbrush, mouthwash, body spray (add until you've successfully offended).

16. BeenJee-Official knows deodorant is a go-to.

Cheap Deodorant. But a lot of it. Like 50 sticks of 1$ Deodorant from the dollar store.

It implies they smell and you deliberately got them the cheap stuff, when the total price could have gotten you a higher quality item.

Not to mention they have to use up every single one of them otherwise they'll feel guilty throwing it out.

Weddings can often bring out the worst in people...

While weddings are meant to be beautiful and emotional celebrations of love with friends and family, they've become TLC reality TV dramas whether you've chosen city hall or a 500 person capacity hotel ballroom. It's hard enough managing bridal parties, finding a dress and a venue, choosing the menu, sending invitations and learning how to be a professional event planner without also having to worry about your guests doing the one job they have which is to show up.

It's rude to not RSVP to a wedding but it's an even more unacceptable crime to RSVP, show up so late you miss the ceremony AND do it all while being the bride's parents. So, when a recent Reddit user in the AITA (Am I the As*hole?) section asked if she was wrong for getting married without her parents watching, the moral compass of marital drama was ready to share their knowledge.

AITA for starting my wedding on time and not waiting for my parents?

I got married on Saturday, and it was absolutely amazing except for one thing: my parents showed up late. They knew the ceremony time, and my husband and I made it very clear to everyone, both in the invites and in person, that we were going to start exactly at that time. The venue cost us a lot of money (we paid for the entire wedding ourselves) and we were only able to use it for a limited amount of time, so we wanted to make every minute count.

So the wedding day came, and half an hour before we were scheduled to start, my parents still hadn't showed up. My husband and I both called them multiple times but nobody answered. We waited and waited, and still heard nothing. Finally, the start time arrived and my parents still weren't there. I was really pissed off at this point. The wedding coordinator asked if I wanted to go ahead and start the wedding, and I said yes. All of our other guests were already there, and we wanted to be considerate of their time.

My parents showed up 15 minutes later and missed the entire ceremony. It turns out they did leave early but got rear-ended at a traffic light and had to deal with insurance, police, etc. They only have a landline, no cellphones, so they couldn't get in touch with me. Obviously there's no way I could have known this.

I'm still frustrated with them for not making more of an effort to get to the venue early, and they're furious at me for not delaying the wedding 15 minutes so they could be there. AITA?

Hopefully this incident will inspire her parents to join the 21st century and get a cell phone...

"Queens_BigBoi" wrote:

you're not an asshole for starting on time, you had no idea how late they would be. (however I've not been to too many weddings but they did last over 15 mins seemed a bit short but that's not really the issue.) Your parents aren't assholes because they were literally in a car crash albeit not huge but this is a legitimate reason to be late to any event. Yes your parents should get cellphones and it would of helped your timing of the event. Yes they will be upset that they missed potentially one of the biggest moments in your life but no one in this situation is an asshole.

"ThrowAwayFriendSally" wrote:

Agree NTA for starting on time. But I don't understand why she is still mad at her parents for being late once she knew what happened. They left home early but got into a car crash. What did the OP want them to do?

"grey_sky" wrote:

I don't know about OP but both my parents and my SO's parents were in the wedding. Everyone in the wedding showed up 3 hours before the ceremony for makeup/helping the bride get ready/pictures.

EVEN if the parents aren't in the wedding, they are TA for not getting there SUPER early for their daughters wedding to help her and be there for moral support.

"Zupheal" wrote:

Honestly tho, who plans to show up exactly when the ceremony is supposed to start? Every wedding I have been to people arrived an hour or so prior to the ceremony.

"crochetjunkie" brought up a great point:

The piece of info I think is missing is: are your parents usually late or are they very prompt?

If they’re chronically late I wouldn’t fault you for starting on time. However, if your parents are always on time my first thought certainly would have waited at least 10 minutes

So, there you have it! The general opinion was that nobody is directly in the wrong here, but the bride could've waited a little bit longer and had faith that her parents wouldn't want to miss their daughter's wedding.

Mr. Rogers is truly a national treasure. His messages of love and kindness are just as necessary today as they were when his show, Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood, debuted in 1968. Most of us grew up with this angel of a man, and now Tom Hanks is playing Fred Rogers in the new movie A Beautiful Day In The Neighborhood. (Let me tell you, my tear ducts are not ready for this film.) Let these wholesome and heartwarming memes remind you that you’re special, just the way you are.

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Star Wars fans are already obsessed with The Mandalorian, Disney's live-action TV series on the new streaming platform Disney+. The breakout star of this series is of course, Baby Yoda. Memes of this wide-eyed and adorable baby alien are popping up everywhere. They are hilariously cute, even if you're not a Star Wars person.

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Relationships with in-laws can get pretty complicated.

If you get along with your significant other's parents, consider yourself lucky. Multiple movie plots have created the stereotype of the evil mother-in-law who threatens and undermines her son's wife whenever she can. It's a weird, old, trope that is highly unhealthy for a family dynamic. Mothers should want their children to be happy and that happiness also applies to the love of their adult child's life.

Especially during the holidays, forcing family together when not everyone gets along is a recipe for disaster. Some families adopt the "push all the trauma under the rug and drown yourself in wine" approach while others apply the "get everything out in a four hour circular screaming match!" Choose a side, stay alive!

When a recent Reddit user consulted the "AITA: Am I the Asshole?" section to ask about his choice to tell his mother-in-law that she can't join them for the holidays, people were ready to join the drama!

AITA for putting my foot down and not allowing my mother in law to come to Christmas.

My mother in law is a horrible person who loves to create drama whenever she can.

last Christmas we got both of our kids different gifts as one was a 13 year old girl and one is a 10 year old boy. my mil (mother in law) decided to tell my daughter that she didn't get as many gifts as my brother and that we spent less on her. basically trying to get our daughter to believe that we loved her less. we then had to deal with a crying 13 year old on Christmas.

she has also brought super expensive gifts for people specifically to upstage everyone, she will even make a point of mentioning how much it is in front of people.

she called up to ask what we will be doing for Christmas as it's our turn, I mentioned that me and my wife want to have a potluck at our place. she then proceeded to explain to me how we shouldn't let some family members cook certain food because of some instances where they fucked up and ruined the dish (this is all completely false information that she is mentioning to try and start some more family drama)

I then decided to put my foot down and told my wife that I do not want her at our house starting drama on Christmas and that her phone call was the last straw.

wife is completely against it and thinks I'm being incredibly cruel to her mum, and doesn't want to exclude her.

"keyonme1990" wrote:

I think once your in a marriage every decision has to be a joint one, even if that means on of you has to compromise. I think "putting your foot down" and ignoring how your wife feels about the situation is an AH move. You're not the AH for not wanting your MIL there, but you and your wife need to have better communication about this.

"Pavsters" wrote:

if the wife is ignoring how her mother is making everyone feel bad, then it is on OP (Original Poster) to do something at least for the sake of their kids.

"AnonImus18" wrote:

My Mother is an alcoholic and I grew up hating the holidays because of it. Don't let this woman ruin your children's memory of Christmas. Your wife may not realize how toxic she is so you may need to remind her of some of the hurtful things she experienced and really get her to question whether she wants that for her own children.

"maisie88" wrote:

Your wife shouldn't be choosing her mother over her own family. How is she ok with her mother's rudeness and cruelty to her own children? She should be telling her mother that her behaviour is not acceptable if she wants to be welcome.

Is couples counseling an option?

So, there you have it! Banish the evil MIL to a tower! Or, have a healthy therapy session and enjoy the holiday season.

It's the end of an era (of celebrating unattainable beauty standards and disordered eating)!

The Victoria's Secret Fashion Show is officially not happening this year. VS's parent company broke the news via Fortune:

L Brands has cancelled 2019’s Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show, saying the decision was part of a move to “evolve the messaging of [the company]”. The move follows months of speculation and the lowest ratings ever for the show in 2018.

“We will be communicating to customers, but nothing similar in magnitude to the fashion show,” said CFO Stuart Burgdoerfer.

The news comes as sales are slumping for the brand: "Sales fell 7% in the latest quarter, compared to a 2% drop during the same period a year ago," says Fortune.

Model Shanina Shaik actually announced the show wouldn't be going forward over the summer, but this news confirms it.

Many are happy to see the VS Fashion Show go.

They're pointing out that Victoria's Secret did this to themselves.

The Victoria's Secret Fashion Show has been both applauded and derided for presenting a uniform batch of tall, thin models that the brand decreed the pinnacle of femininity.

The brand's former CEO said in 2018 that "transsexuals" shouldn't be allowed in the show because it's supposed to be a "fantasy." VS also resisted the push to included diverse body types in the show.

The brand announced that size-14 model Ali Tate-Cutler would be featured in a campaign last month but for many, it was too little, too late.

Other lingerie brands have been featuring diverse body types in their advertising for years — and this is where Savage x Fenty comes in.

Rihanna's lingerie line has been celebrated for featuring bold, confident models with a diverse range of body types since day one.

The brand announced a new ambassador, Normani Kordei, hours before the VS show cancellation was made public. The difference between Normani's photos and the typical dead-eyed VS promos is striking.

Rihanna's fans are out in full force, playfully dancing on the VS Fashion Show's grave.

Even former VS Angel Bella Hadid got in on it, indirectly shading Victoria's Secret when she said in an interview that Rihanna was the first designer who ever made her feel sexy on a runway.

Still, a select few are mourning the show because, while problematic and a bit behind the times, it certainly yielded some iconic moments.

Especially for a brief era in the late '90s and early 2000s when we thought "skinny but still with big boobs" was the pinnacle of body inclusivity.

And at the end of the day, some people are just concerned about Leonardo DiCaprio's dating life.

Grief is a complicated web of emotions that looks and feels different for every person and each loss. While some cultures are open about addressing the inevitability of death, the United States is deeply repressed about facing loss head-on, at least in our public cultural awareness.

When someone loses a loved one it's par for the course to send flowers, meals, and words of comfort and condolence for months following the loss. But in general, it's uncommon to create space for people to dive into the memories of their loved one long beyond the funeral experience. In part, this is because of a general cultural discomfort with the process of slowing down to think about mortality.

But also, there is an unrealistic notion of grief being this linear straight-forward process, that someone will be sadder right after the death and the sadness will fade away with the years, vs the reality of there being ebbs and flows and memory triggers.

The kicker is, of course, that everyone deals with death eventually, so realistically grief is one of the most intense universal human experiences.

In a recent Twitter thread, the comedian and writer Michael Cruz Kayne opened up about the loss of his son 10 years ago, and how grief has shaped and changed his life for the past decade.

Kayne kick off the conversation by noting that most conversations about grief are very strained and formalized, because of the stigma around directly addressing death.

He went on to talk about how grief isn't a singular feeling of sadness, it's a much larger and more complex web of feelings.

Grieving includes moments of anger, confusion, absurdity, and sometimes even humor and gratitude.

The cultural assumption of a singular, linear feeling of sadness around grief makes it far more isolating for those going through it to process.

Kayne went on to share that his dead son has a twin who is alive, and experiencing how great the living son is often makes the family miss the dead son even more.

While this thread is one of the first times he's processed in a public space, Kayne shared that their family is very open about their son's death with the other kids, and it's just how they've chosen to navigate grief as a family.

Kayne ended the thread by encouraging people to ask their grieving friends about their loss in a more nuanced way (if emotionally equipped), because there is so much to process beyond the immediate shock.

One of them most isolating aspects of grief, Kayne wrote, is the fact that it's only presented as a wave of sadness and not an ocean of corresponding feelings and memories.

He encouraged those grieving to allow themselves to be more open and honest about the complexities with their friends and loved ones, while noting that even if you haven't dealt with grief yet, you will eventually. So digging into the realities and the wealth of depth with those hurting is a way to expand your perspective and stop running from the inevitable.

A lot of people on the thread shared their own experiences with grief, and echoed Kayne's sentiments about the healing process not being linear or predictable.

One woman shared how she's grieved her mom openly in hopes of making her friends feel less confused and alienated when they go through the same process.

Other parents who also lost kids shared how they hold the memories close daily.

Several people also shared how grief makes the concept of time feel strange, and how it can feel alienating and infuriating to watch other people live their lives fazed out and going through the motions.

Kayne kicked off his thread by saying this "isn't what Twitter is for," but the outpouring of support and stories suggest the opposite. Opening up about the realities of pain and loss is crucial for healing, and social media can serve as a connective tool for people to have these conversations.

A man has been convicted in the death of 21-year-old British backpacker Grace Millane — but his name is remaining private, all while Grace's sex preferences and dating past have been made public as part of the trial.

Many feel that this amounts to victim-blaming of the highest order.

Meanwhile, the killer — even though he was convicted this morning — is enjoying full privacy thanks to New Zealand law, as that's where the murder took place.

If the man, who's 27, was accused of murder in the US or the UK, his name would have been made public long ago. But this isn't the case in New Zealand where the trial took place. It all comes down to New Zealand's laws, according to Cosmopolitan UK:

New Zealand, however, has strict name suppression laws, which date back to the 1920s. These laws were originally intended to protect first-time young offenders to spare them from public shame so they could go on to get to jobs after they had fulfilled their punishment. [...]

More recently, there’s been a change in favour of transparency and open justice, but in high profile cases such as this one, New Zealand criminal courts still prefer anonymity for defendants to ensure they get a fair trial.

​​​​​​

It's possible the man's name could be made public when he's sentenced in February 2020, Cosmo UK adds, but it's up to the judge.

Grace met the murderer the night before her 22nd birthday. Her body was later found buried in a suitcase in a shallow grave.

In the trial, the man's lawyers tried to blame Grace's death on her preference for rough sex. They implied that she died because of a "sex game gone wrong." But they couldn't hide the fact that her killer purchased a suitcase, put her body in it, and buried her in a shallow grave. He also went on a date with another woman the next night — which he'd organized while Grace's body lay next to him, he told police. And he got caught lying to law enforcement about several details, thanks to CCTV footage.

During the trial, one woman even testified that she'd been scared for her safety during a sexual encounter with the man:

"He had grabbed my forearms and put all the pressure on my arms so I couldn’t breathe and I couldn’t move my arms. I started kicking, trying to indicate I couldn’t breathe. I was kicking violently. He would have felt me fighting," the woman told the court.

Unable to free herself, the witness shared with the jury how she believed she was going to die. 'This can’t be the way I die', she told the court she had thought during the scary incident.

Despite all this — the man's violent history and the fact that he was caught lying in court — the court has decided he deserves privacy, the BBC reports:

Justice Simon Moore ordered that the suppression order which prevents naming the defendant would remain in place indefinitely until lifted by the court.

So instead of the man's name and face being publicized while he awaits sentencing, Grace herself is being smeared.

The New Zealand Herald published a story with the headline, "The girl behind the headlines: boyfriends and hangovers."

The Independent saw fit to dedicate an entire story to Grace's alleged "BDSM fetishes."

Many are pointing out that if someone enjoys rough sex, this does not mean they've given consent to be murdered.

And no one's preferences give someone else license to murder them.

People are pointing out the absurdity of her murderer being granted anonymity while Grace's personal life is dragged through the mud.

Some are suggesting it's a blind spot in New Zealand law.

But the posthumous slut-shaming of female murder victims is a problem that exists in pretty much every society.

Mornings are busy. You don't have time to search the entire internet for a funny meme, you've got teeth to brush and traffic to rage about. Luckily for you, we combed social media for the funniest memes around. These are guaranteed to help you start your morning off with a laugh.

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Working in retail is already a special sort of nightmare.

Entitled customers, unorganized piles of clothing, and constant stolen items create a stressful (and often severely underpaid) work environment. Working on Black Friday, though, is the entrance to a new level of hell.

All the problematic, "let me speak to the manager" customers on regular days turn into a maniacal packs of savings-thirsty Harry Potter "dementors" on on the day after Thanksgiving. Something about eating, drinking and spending time with family turns people into materialistic monsters? People fight over the last sale items with brute strength. The scenes are reminiscent of a post apocalyptic looting session. Most retail workers don't make commission so they're basically working as security guards for most of the day.

So, it's no surprise that when a Reddit user asked, "Retail workers of reddit, what's your Black Friday horror story?" people everywhere were prepared to share their tales from the madness.

1. Amazing, "VeryLazyLewis."

Black Friday at ASDA (British Walmart) there was these microwaves like 70% off and the store and was so busy you couldn't move. There was empty shelves all along the aisle up to these microwaves and a guy laid down on the shelf and army crawled along the shelves grabbed a microwave and army crawled back with it.

2. Oh my god, "Thebootydiaries."

We had a lady call the police on our store because we sold out of a TV. I really wish I was lying... they came too.

3. People love lines, "IntentionalTexan."

Worked at a store that had a service department. They couldn't ring up anything at the service counter but they had a computer which made it look like a register. Guy is standing there patiently waiting to be rung up. Finally somebody notices him and asks what he needs. "I'd like to pay." he says. "I'm sorry this isn't a register" replies the service tech. The guy then proceeds to try and convince the service tech to let him pay because the line for the main registers is three hours long. Of course the service tech couldn't because he didn't have a register. He just had a computer for making appointments and such. So after 15 minutes of argument the guy moves off to find the line. Here's the fun part. While he was arguing somebody else saw him standing by something that looked like a register and so got in line behind him. Then people saw the shorter line and got in behind them. With nobody to control it the line to nowhere grew quickly. 15 minutes was all it took for the not-line to snake all the way around the department. So when the doofus who started this whole fiasco went to find the right line he found the end of the line he had started. Then the guy behind him heard that there wasn't a register so he followed the first guy. Then the next customer followed the 2nd and so on. They walked around in a circle for an hour before somebody noticed them. We almost had a riot when a manager had to tell 100 people that they weren't in line and had just waited an hour for nothing. That same year we had several scuffles at points where the register line had forked into two lines. From then on we marked off a huge register path and had several employees just manage the line.

4. Victory! "TheWastelandWizard."

Worked at Wal-Mart years ago; One of my mangers thought she was being sneaky and swapped my Black Friday off shift, with an on at 9 am (My shifts normally didn't start until 1, and ended at 9, so this was utter bullshit). I was in the bakery department and had to work all of Thanksgiving the day before, and they ended up needing more help. I came in at 6 am that day, and worked a 14 hour shift, because most of my team had been given the holiday off, my managers excuse being "You're young! They have families they need to be with and kids to celebrate with!" so I was pretty angry.

I found out that the Black Friday sale was a 65" LCD tv in electronics and PS3's, so needless to say it was going to be a bloodbath, I stayed in my department because there was literally no one else there and caught up on much needed sanitation, when the manager found out before the sale started she came my way to rain down fire, brimstone, and bullshit on me.

Thankfully, I could use their own bullshit policies against them. There needs to be at least one member of the bakery crew on hand to write on cakes, and since I was the only one there, they were shit outta luck. I got out of Black Friday bullshit, got an easy day of work, and the perfect spot to watch the chaos all while screwing over a manager I hated. It was a beautiful day.

5. Retail is a battlefield, "kittiekatie0629."

I work at the largest lingerie retailer in the country. We had a security guard last night for the beginning of black Friday. A southern belle mother decided she didn't want to wait in a 50 person deep line and she would cut.

Our security guard asked her multiple times to step to the back of the line or leave. She proceeded to ream him with every curse word in the book, and ended by threatening him with a gun she had in her bag.

This will be my last holiday in retail.

7. OH MY GOD NO, "Sufiguru1137."

Τhe customer who took a sh*t in one оf my fitting rooms and then wiped hіs a*s with a $125 Polo Ralph Lauren ѕhirt. Nothing more needs to be said.

8. This is terrible, "bearded_booty."

When I was 15 I got my first actual job. It was at a clothing store and my first day was Black Friday. I thought it wouldn't be a big deal because I was hired for men's formal wear.

When I show up at 4AM, they manager tells me I'm working women's shoes today only.

Absolute madness.

The worst part is shoes salesmen get commission, but since I didn't have employee numbers I got only minimum wage. Losing out of hundreds of dollars extra pay.

9. This is hell, "HeyNomad."

About 15 years ago, I was working at a book store in a mall. Somehow, around 5pm maybe, I found myself the only employee in the entire store--not a single coworker to be found, and we were slammed with customers. We usually had music playing in the store, controlled by an ordinary 5-CD stereo in the back office, and of course this is the day the inoffensive holiday music gets brought into circulation.

Around the time I found myself alone, I noticed the stereo had become stuck on repeat, just playing the same song over and over. It was at least an hour before I was able to get away from the counter, and so that was the day I was forced to listen to some kind of generic "A Very Jazzy Jinglebells" some 30 times back to back.

10. Long live the VHS/DVD combo-console, "segaduette."

2005 I worked Walmart black Friday. I saw some moron pull the bottom DVD player in a stack and cause probably 20 or 30 of them the fall over everyone.

that was the same DVD I watched a woman get punched in the face over.

it was one of those DVD vcr combos that you just HAD to have. I think it was like $50 bucks. and we had pallets and pallets of them left over after the fact.

people are nuts.

11. Wow, "lanky132."

I work in a bar, which is usually unaffected by Black Friday but two years ago the bar was stupidly busy. This guy come up and orders two double Jameson's whiskey straight no ice. It was the only spirit not on the optic I pour it out and accidentally knock it against the bar spilling a drop I Carry on because of how busy the bar was. He then says I work for trading standards then proceeds to take out a Walter white style chemistry set. He tests the whiskey to make sure we don't water it down and then measures the shot. Since I knocked it there was 48ml instead of the 50ml it should of been. They then proceed to take me to court because of short measurement, my company backs me up and sends a team of lawyers to cover me. Resulting in a slap on the wrist and an optional fine of £250.01 if I want to pay it which I did not.

12. Dear god, "Sinna17."

Customer walks into apple..."so I've never had a cellphone and want to compare all the cellphone plans" ON BLACK FRIDAY

13. Wow, "hahayouknowwhatitis420."

My first day of retail was on Black Friday, I got hired at Home Depot and they didn't know what to do with me so they put me in the Christmas Tree lot, basically somebody would come pick out a tree and I would mend it to their specifications with a chainsaw which I have never used before in my life. I wasn't given any gloves and whenever I asked for some somebody would tell me they'll grab me some but never came back. So my hands were all sappy. The worst experience was that a woman had started yelling at me and even demanded to speak to a manager because she insisted that I was the one who promised to save her the Christmas Tree clippings so she could make a wreath. I had not seen her before in my life.

14. Vultures! "shadowrider666."

I was working at a retail store and this women leaves her cart alone for one second to go check something out and customers just raided her cart and took everything in it, worst part was that we were out of everything she had in the cart so she had no way of getting it back.

If you've ever been curious about what actually goes down at a sex party, maybe it's time to take the leap...

When a recent Reddit user asked "People who've gone to an orgy party, what are some common misconceptions that people have about orgies?" experienced people everywhere were ready to share.

If you're thinking that sex parties are unhinged, lawless, sweaty human-piles of humping you're actually wrong. According to most accounts, consent and respect are key to a safe and fun orgy. Of course, this shouldn't be a shock as consent and respect are also key to any safe and fun sexual experience, but people tend to think "kinkiness" is synonymous with a free-for-all.

Is it awkward if you see someone you know? What if you bring your partner and realize you're actually pretty jealous? Is it a dark, loud, sex dungeon with ecstasy and cocaine everywhere? Sure, there might be a few bumps in the road (hopefully not STD bumps) but if you're interested in exploring your wilder side, these orgy experts are here to tell the truth...

1. Good to know! "itsalltucci."

There’s a buffet

2. It's just a regular party? "Smallgenie549."

People actually socialize. Lots of talking and drinks are involved. Everyone was a regular, so there was a lot of catching up each month. The sex was more of a byproduct than the main attraction.

3. Wow, "Sasha_Fire."

I got invited to an eyes wide shut party not knowing what it was because I'd never seen the movie, well...it's exactly what you think it's gonna be. There was a lady giving blowjobs to three guys in one bedroom and another doing a toys show in the living room and me standing in the kitchen drinking beer having no idea what to do. I eventually left because I wasn't up for an orgy, also the ratio seemed more like a gang bang with three women (4 including my beer drinking self) and maybe 12-15 guys?

4. All bodies are beautiful! "AnaestheticAnaesthetic."

Everyone there is hot. Not true. Average people there. You might see someone that you think is hot, sure. But it's normal everyday people getting it on.

5. Safety first! "TickPocket."

Sex and Relationship counselor here. I’ve learned about this stuff for my clients sake. It’s not my cup of tea but perfectly respectful as a sexual interest. Here’s what I’ve learned with regards to premeditated group sex:

Some people assume that they can just walk into an orgy (or a sex party of any kind) and things will magically just happen to them/for them. They assume that everyone is there to have sex, that they’ll have sex with anyone, and that they’ll be down for anything.

In reality, legitimate sex parties or planned orgies, especially those with experienced organizers, place an INCREDIBLE amount of importance on consent, communication, and courtesy. People aren’t just “expected” to have sex with you, they can withdraw their consent at any time, nobody is obligated to participate in any activity, and nobody is obligated to do things with anyone in particular. There is usually a brief/debrief in the form of an introduction and “groundrules” that everyone is presented with beforehand (such as through email or the day of).

Experienced orgy-holders will also have special rules for non-con activity. Some very thorough parties make you sign contracts for non-con behaviour including outlining your understanding of safewords and limits. It’s also not unheard of for STI checks to be made and/or for condoms or other barriers to be made available AND mandatory especially if the party is larger.

There are, obviously, exceptions to this where Organization is low. consent isn’t emphasized, STIs aren’t checked, and safety/respect isn’t as much of a concern. Engage at your own risk.

6. Yikes, "larrieuxa."

Hated it when I went to one. It was very socially awkward. Imagine you're at a bar having to reject men you aren't interested in who are coming on to you. That already sucks. Now imagine when they approach you instead of talking these men are immediately touching you, stroking your hair or shoulders or butt and you have to find ways to put them off still, and when they finally get a clue they sit there and stroke their dicks watching you have sex with someone else. Never again.

7. Consent is critical, "OneAndOnlyJackSchitt."

Every party I've ever been to (that wasn't an impromptu party) had rules listed out ahead of time and people were right quick about enforcing the 'no touching without asking' rule.

8. Very informative, "ghostingfortacos."

Ah yes, something I can answer. So basically most nights start of normal. There's snacks and drinks, music, mingling. Just a lot of normal party stuff. At some point people may break off into groups and grab a room or start a pile on the floor or in the pool.

People watch. So many people just watch. Which is fine as long as they are quiet and respectful. Tacky comments like "shove it up her ass!" Aren't generally appreciated.

Ask before you join. Very very few people have zero qualms about what's going on. Everyone has the right to say no. Maybe you look like her dad, or his sister. If you just jump in, they may kick you out of the pile and not ask you back. Always, always ask.

Not everyone is 6' tall, 140 lbs of lean muscle. You've got moms, dads, fat people, skinny people, old people, youngish people. You might find a group who is all over 50 piled on the floor, humping the night away. Don't be fucking rude and say shit like "nobody is hot here" or "everyone is old". It isn't the world's job to jerk you off (or flick your bean). They have every right to fuck on my carpet, ok. (As long as they put a towel down first)

There isnt a ton of drugs around. Occasionally someone who is rolling might show up but there isn't a platter with a pound of coke lying around for public consumption. Sometimes alcohol is prohibited entirely. Yeah, sober orgies are a thing.

Not everyone is someone you wanna fuck. That rude couple that pissed you off at the fridge is likely to be boning next to you.

Rotten crotch is a thing and can really ruin a good time. If you have a fishy odor/std please stay home and recuperate before you give 30 people BV or a yeast infection, or worse. I'd also not recommend an orgy if you have a permanent std, because fucking 30 people in one night is a good way to have the health department pounding down your door.

You have to clean up after yourself. Even if there is paid staff to wash sheets you need to clean up after yourself. Good host gifts for an orgy are detergent, cups, paper towels and tp, baby wipes, condoms and lube, puppy pads, sheets and towels (white), gloves, bottled water and sport drink mix, a vinyl bed cover (they get ripped easily), snacks and sodas, trash bags. If someone is hosting the orgy at their house, ask if they need help cleaning up before, during, or after.

Lastly, a lot of times, nothing insane goes down, but everyone still has fun. I'd rather someone come out and dip their toes in than feel forced to participate.

9. Respect boundaries, "iGetHighPlayRS."

Misconception: it’s full of super hot model type men and women (10s).

Truth: there’s maybe one or two 8s, a good mix of 5-7 and a LOT of 2-3s.

Misconception: everyone is fucking everywhere

Truth: there may be a few people getting it on publicly, a decent amount in the ‘couples only’ areas & more in private locked rooms.

Misconception: only extreme sexual deviants attend these extremely exclusive parties

Truth: they’re not that exclusive, there are quite a few open on weekends to anyone old enough to enter depending on where you live. Make a fetlife account and find out what’s around you. There’s also a lot of really normal people. There might be one or two extremes but I’ve yet to run into any and I’ve been to quite a few. Usually, you’ll get to know someone a bit and find out what they’re into beforehand.

Misconception: it’s dangerous and you will be taken advantage of

Truth: i’ve seen more respect for one another and clear boundaries/consent discussion in these places than I have anywhere else in life.

Feel free to ask anything else :)

10. "Made me sad lol," "AMW204."

Don’t do it with someone you’re trying to date. I went to a foursome with a girl I was crazy about. It wasn’t fun for me. But if it was with three people I was comfortable with it probably would have been great. Watching the girl I was nuts about get dicked didn't really do it for me. Made me sad lol

11. It's a family affair? "OneAndOnlyJackSchitt."

That you won't run into someone you know. (This is applicable for swinger parties and less for parties with friends that turn into orgies, obviously.)

My wife and I go to swinger parties. We live in a small town (150,000 people. It's southern California, that's a small number of people to us). My wife's mom is a social hub and personally knows like 300 people. A lot of my wife's mom's friends are in or periphery to the swinger lifestyle. So we see people we know from outside of the swinger lifestyle randomly at swinger parties.

It's surprisingly not as big of a deal as it seems like it would be. We understand they won't rat us out, they understand we won't rat them out. Occasionally people even bring their siblings (not to sleep with, but to carpool). I couldn't bring myself to do it, but it is kinda hot nailing two different sisters in one night.

12. There's competition! "Xhira."

In movies they look like sensual dreamily lit affairs with lots of soft moaning and sighing and slow fucking.

In reality many people are damn noisy. Lots of overenthusiastic yelling, moaning, and vigorous flesh smacking, ball-slapping sex. I once lay down with someone i’d just met, there was a woman really shouting her head off with apparently orgasmic delight next to us. She was setting some kind of gold standard. There was no way we’d be able to bang as good. So we both just shriveled and quietly went away.

13. Don't be the creep! "EricaLeeRomeo."

Don't be the creepiest guy at the orgy!

There's always some asshole in a plague mask and a zorro cape, or who won't take his boots off, or says, "No homo" every time he touches a guy by accident, or who thinks you ask for consent like, "May I penetrate you" like a serial killer.

Cut it out. Relax and hang back, or find a thing to do, but if you can't come correct, FIX YOURSELF. Its not to late to just stop doing the stupid thing, and act normal

14. It's like speed dating! "digmachine."

I went to a gay orgy pool party. I was surprised at the amount of nonsexual socializing that was happening. You play for a while and then you cum, and then it's like "so, what kind of video games do you like?"

If you've spent any sizable amount of time reading stories on the internet, it's likely you're already familiar with Humans of New York, an account dedicated to short interviews with everyday people about their back stories and hopes for the future.

The photo interviews are sometimes as short and pithy as a few sentences of reflection, or a takeaway quote, but other times HONY stumbles onto a story so rich and multi-layered it could fill up multiple movie scripts.

This is precisely what happened when the former dancer Tanqueray opened up about getting kicked out at 17, attending the Fashion Institute of Technology, making costumes and eventually dancing for mob members

She wrote:

"My mom threw me out of the house at seventeen for getting pregnant, then had me arrested when I tried to get my clothes. Then she fucked the head of parole to try to keep me in jail. She was some prime pussy back then. But the warden did some tests on me and found out I was smart, so I got a scholarship to go anywhere in New York. I chose the Fashion Institute of Technology, which I hated. But by that time I was already getting work making costumes for the strippers and porn stars in Times Square. All my friends were gay people, because they never judged me."

"All I did was gay bars: drag queen contests, Crisco Disco, I loved the whole scene. And I couldn’t get enough of the costumes. My friend Paris used to sit at the bar and sell stolen clothes from Bergdorf and Lord and Taylors, back before they had sensor tags. So I had the best wardrobe: mink coats, 5 inch heels, stockings with seams up the back. I looked like a drag queen, honey. One night a Hasidic rabbi tried to pick me up because he thought I was a tranny. I had to tell him: ‘Baby, this is real fish!"

Tanqueray shared how she used to wear mink coats and compete in drag queen contests, which dancing techniques she was known for, and how one of her former colleagues went on to appear in The Longest Yard with Burt Reynolds.

She wrote:

“My stripper name was Tanqueray. Back in the seventies I was the only black girl making white girl money. I danced in so many mob clubs that I learned Italian. Black girls weren’t even allowed in some of these places. Nothing but guidos with their pinky rings and the one long fingernail they used for cocaine. I even did a full twenty minutes in the place they filmed Saturday Night Fever. But I made my real money on the road. Three grand on some trips. Every time Fort Dix had their pay day, they’d bring me in as a feature and call me ‘Ms. Black Universe’ or some shit like that."

"I had this magic trick where I’d put baby bottle tops on my nipples and squirt real milk, then I’d pull a cherry out of my G-string and feed it to the guy in the front row. But I never used dildos on stage or any shit like that. Never fucked the booking agents. Never fucked the clients. In fact, one night after a show, I caught another dancer sneaking off to the Tate Hotel with our biggest tipper. Not allowed. So the next night we put a little itching powder in her G-string. Boy did she put on a show that night. Didn’t see her again until ‘The Longest Yard’ with Burt Reynolds. So I guess she finally fucked the right one.”

Her photos and stories were enthralling enough that HONY sat down with her for a follow-up, where she dished more on her life and showcased a picture of her from her dancing days.

She wrote:

“The scene was different back then. All the adult clubs were mob controlled. It all flowed up to some guy named Matty The Horse. Honestly the mob guys never bothered me. They were cool, and I liked how they dressed. They wore custom made suits. And they went to hair stylists, not barbers. These guys wouldn’t even let you touch their hair when you were fucking them. Not that I ever fucked them. Because I never turned tricks. Well, except for one time. I took a job from this woman named Madame Blanche. She controlled all the high dollar prostitutes back then."

She opened up about a woman named Madame Blanche who controlled all the "high dollar" sex workers back in the day, and shared a former president used to hook up with one of her friends and colleagues.

She joked that since she can't afford a high-powered lawyer, she has to keep the president's name mum.

"She was like the Internet-- could get you anything you wanted. And all the powerful men came to her because she never talked. She set me up with a department store magnate who wanted a black girl dressed like a maid. I thought I could do it. But when I got to his hotel room, he wanted to spank me with a real belt. So that was it for me. I was done. But Madame Blanche set my best friend Vicki up with The President every time he came to New York. And don’t you dare write his name cause I can’t afford the lawyers. But he’d always spend an hour with her. He’d send a car to pick her up, bring her to his hotel room, put a Secret Service agent in front of the door, and get this: all he ever did was eat her pussy!”"

Her wealth of stories has taken the internet by storm, and now people are demanding she be given a book deal, an interview show, or a Netflix series.

Among those eager to see Tanqueray's story told was actress Jennifer Garner.

While a lot of bridges would need to be crossed to tell Tanqueray's story on a big screen (particularly if it's gonna be lawsuit free), it's crystal clear the world wants to hear more about her brilliant life.

Regardless of how many times we hear the idiom "don't judge a book by its cover," it's still pretty common to make assumptions about people's lifestyles and emotional patterns based on how they look or who they hang out with.

In a popular Reddit thread, user hollywoodh17 shared a story about The Hell's Angels coming to their uncle's funeral and just how kind they were.

The Hell's Angels came to my uncle's funeral. What's the nicest thing you've seen a gang do?

OP encouraged others to share the nicest things they've seen gangs members or seemingly tough people do, as a way to break some of the misconceptions.

1. The thread of stories started out with OP's, which is refreshingly wholesome.

My mom had four older brothers. One I've only met once, because he lives in Florida and that's halfway across the country. Growing up, the other three all lived in my hometown, and I saw two of them pretty regularly. The other uncle - Dewey - only came around when he really needed something.

Dewey was a good ol' boy born into a family of staunch whitebread catholics. Dewey was completely bald, with a mustache/goatee combo that would make Jamie Hyneman jealous, and mirrored sunglasses that never left his face. Dewey liked his smoking and his drinking and his f*cking and his motorcycle. Dewey and my grandfather - a WWII vet who drove himself to the hospital when he was having a heart attack because "ambulances are too expensive and will wake up the neighbors" - never got along. Dewey was a wild child: married by 21, kid by 23, divorced by 25.

He soon joined up with a local band of bikers and rolled around the city (according to my mom; I was still young) looking for a good time. I distinctly remember him coming to Christmas and Thanksgiving parties, having a couple beers, and leaving because "He had drinking to do." He never stuck around for food or festivities or church - just had a couple cold ones, shot the shit with his sister for a bit, and rolled off into the night.

I remember when he was diagnosed with cirrhosis. He spent just a few weeks in the hospital and I went and saw him one last time with my family. He still looked jovial - he was never a bad guy, always called me "little dude", and had a dirty joke to tell - and while my family beat around the bush when it came to his impeding death, he gave me the best deathbed wish I've ever heard. "I don't want anyone to grieve for me after I've gone," he said. "I've lived my life as full as I could. I had a damn good time every day of my life and I regret nothing. Don't be sad that I've died, I want you all to f*cking party for me."

We had a typical funeral - ironic, I know - but during the wake we heard a tremendous commotion outside, like hundreds of bees landing in the parking lot. The door swung open, and in walked two or three dozen hardcore bikers - bandanas, Hells Angels vests, sunglasses, skulls on everything, dirty leather chaps, long greasy hair, smell of motor oil and whiskey. My conservative family fell silent and watched as these tough motherfuckers walked up to his casket. One at a time, they paid their respects. Some prayed. Some cried. Some talked to him, promising to ride again with him in the great beyond. Some stood quietly in reverie.

They were devoted to their fallen brother, and so incredibly respectful to my grandparents you would have thought my grandfather was their drill instructor. They thanked him, told my grandmother they were sorry for her loss, and left as suddenly as they'd come, leaving only the vague scent of Jack on the air and a heavy, unspoken lesson about camaraderie in our hearts.

tl;dr: My uncle rode hard throughout his life, and his biker buddies tearfully attended his funeral, teaching all of us a valuable life lesson.

EDIT: I had no idea this was going to be so prolific! Thank you all for your stories and comments. I have tried to read every single comment posted in response to the thread, and have responded to some. I have to leave work for the day but will be back tomorrow with another (true, for the unbelievers) story about the grandfather mentioned above.

2. tcinternet had a biker who protected the kids.

I ran the after-school program at an elementary school in a rough part of town. Our playground was actually a "city park", which meant we couldn't do the maintenance on broken equipment and I couldn't kick people out to make it safer for my kids. I'd had problems with some teen & 20-something dickheads drinking and fingerbanging their meth head girlfriends while the kids were out playing, and goddammit, we didn't deserve to just stay inside because cops didn't patrol. My kids deserved to play. It was frustrating.

One day, a couple gnarly old 1%ers approached me while we were outside (which scared me) and asked if I had been having trouble with the neighbors coming around. I told them that it had been pretty rough. One just clapped a hand on my back and said "Y'aint gonna have that no more, and y'aint gonna have no trouble from us." The next day, a biker was by the basketball court keeping watch while the kids played, and left when we were done. That continued every day for the rest of the school year. Also, the guys who "stood watch" never smoked or cussed while the kids were out there. I don't condone their activity, but I appreciated their help.

3. RTardSusie saw a Hell's Angel put out a fire.

Every friday the 13 the Hells Angels gather at Port Dover near where I live in Ontario. I once saw a man's hotdog stand go up in flames and a Hells Angel member ran over killed the fire with his leather jacket.

Edit: here's a picture of how packed it gets there: http://www.pd13.com/image.php?height=500&image=/slideShow/IMG_9030.JPG

4. laelacat is grateful for the bikers who protected their town from the Westboro Baptist Church.

The Westboro Baptist Church came to my town to protest President Obama's visit, and to also claim that a massive tornado that killed 161 people in my town just few days prior was deserved for whatever reasons. Luckily, HUNDREDS of bikers in gangs and truckers blocked them in at a gas station and nobody saw them that day.

5. kjfwb8 received help from a former car thief.

When I was in highschool I went on a double date to go see a movie (don't remember which one) and when we came out of the theater we realized that my friend who drove had locked his keys in the car.

We spent an hour or so asking/begging cops that we saw in the parking lot to unlock the car for us and every one of them turned us down.

Then seemingly out of nowhere this gentleman appears, sees us looking in the window of our car, and asks if he can help us. We explain the situation, he says he can help. Within fifteen seconds our car is unlocked.

Being amazed highschoolers we just stared in awe at what had happened, then he leaves us with these parting words: "Today is my first day out of prison, I was in for grand theft auto" and off he walked.

6. kehresj's mom was helped by a "warlock."

My mom got a flat tire years ago, with three kids under the age of five in the car. mind you, it was this middle of summer and she had no cell phone. The typical bad a*s, long beard biker pulled over and changed the tire for her without a question. she tried to give him money, and his response was "just tell everyone a warlock helped you out."

7. Easy_p's professor gave a geology lecture to 100 Hell's Angels in the Ozark Mountains.

Professor told us this story while we were on a field trip in Arkansas.

He was giving a lesson in the Ozark Mountains at some outcrop on the side of the road when he heard a rumble coming down the road. Next thing he knew there were about 100 rough and tumble Hells Angels coming toward them. As they passed he said the rumble was deafening.

Finally the whole crew passed them, when he noticed that the leader of the pack called for a u-turn. As they made the u-turn they approached the class going on and all the bikers brought their bikes to a stop. Not knowing what was going on, my professor asks if he can help them. The leader then proceeded to say that he saw something about geology on the history channel and was wondering if he could sit in on the lecture my professor was giving. With a laugh my professor obliged and looks back on it as the most rewarding lecture he's ever given.

8. PsyPup has a few good biker stories.

Two good encounters with Bikies.

The father of a schoolmate was an Angel. Despite being an enourmous, scary, hairy, bear of a man who was constantly covered in leather and stunk of oil and beer... he was a great guy. He always looked after his kids and their friends, when one of my friends got lost on the local moorland he got some mates on buggies to go find him.

The second one was more recently. I ride a shitty little 50cc scooter, and was at the front of a bunch of cars trying to change lanes so I could turn of the major road I was in after a light change... two bikies, not sure which gang there are a ton local, saw me struggling with some asshole in a 4x4 not getting ahead or falling back so I could change lanes. These two bikies swung infront of him and forced an entire lane to slow down, then waved me in.

9. shehulkie has nothing but love for bike clubs.

The bike clubs around here are great. My niece was born with a rare condition and needed several surgeries (that of course insurance wouldn't cover) in the first few years of her life. We had to raise $100,000.00. The bike clubs came through EVERY time. They are some of the nicest people in the world. Just this weekend I went to a Nam Knights event which raised over $10,000.00 (I think) for children with cancer. They are some of the most caring and charitable people I have ever met.

10. BuzzyBunny's uncle had an understanding with the gangs.

My uncle used to work with kids and teenagers in inner city Chicago. He helped start a soup kitchen and a school for kids in tough situations. He also used to do gang interventions, trying to get gangs to let a member out or leave someone alone, things like that. He was a Franciscan and always wore his robes when he went out at night or was expecting trouble. Gang members shot near him or above his head quite a bit, but they always deliberately missed. Other members of his community learned to always venture into dangerous territory in their robes because Chicago gang members just don't shoot Franciscan Brothers or Sisters.

11. Hawlwadig's mom got fancy dinner from a group of Crips.

I didn't see this personally, but about 20 years ago my mother was a 5th grade teach in Compton. For those of you who don't know, Compton pretty notorious when it comes to its concentration of gangs and gang violence. Especially in the immigrant district, which is where she lived and taught. It was a pretty average night if you heard between 1-10 gunshots. My mom, being the fucking boss that she is, refused to leave the district or teach anywhere else.

Anyways, her first year teaching there she had a group of 5 boys. All of them living in destitute poverty. During break, they loved to draw pictures of cars like Lamborghini's and Porsches. All things that they could never afford. They all promised my mom that if they ever got a car, she would be the first person that they would take for a ride.

Skipping ahead about 8 years my mom was leaving the school late after staying to grade some tests. As she was walking to her car, she saw a shady group of boys leaning against a car watching her. She began to walk fast but they boys got up and began walking towards her. All of them were wearing the telltale blue bandanas (crips) and my mom said they she could see one who was packing a Saturday night special. Anyways just as she got to her car door the group of boys reached her. One of them spoke in deep, intimidating voice "Mrs, we're here to take you for a ride". My mom thought she was being kidnapped, and reached for her pepper spray. Then another of the group stepped forward and introduced themselves as the 5 boys that she taught about 8 years ago

They squeezed my mom into the backseat of a old, beat up Cadillac between two of the students. They took her to a really fancy restaurant somewhere and paid for her meal in full. Later they took her back to her car, dropped her off, and told her if she ever needed anything to call them. Then drove off.

TL;DR My mom went out to some fine dining with some crip members.

Edit: Porsches, not porches. It would still be pretty cool to see someone driving a porch though.

12. twistedfork's uncle was mourned for miles.

Not the Hell's Angels, but another motorcycle "club" that my uncle was a member of showed up with hundred of people after he was killed in an accident (hit by a drunk driver while on his bike). The funeral home was about 5 miles from the cemetary and I am pretty sure that's how long the procession was.

13. Faranya has seen The Hell's Angels raise money for babies.

The Hell's Angels participate in an annual toy drive around here, collecting toys for poor or sick children.

14. 7fingersphil still remembers the unlikely friendship.

Well this isn't a gang but certainly a story about a bad a*s thug. Where I went to school was pretty middle class white. However there was one part of town that was kind of rough as it butted up against the rougher town right next to us. There was a kid that went to my school that was a senior when I was a sophomore. He was honestly probably the biggest bad ass in my school. He was about six two, two hundred and forty pounds. He was all muscle and in high school he already had a body filled up with prison style tattoos.

I know he had spent some time in juvy. One day from a distance i saw some other typical white thug kids kind of taunting a kid with obvious mental handicap issues. I couldn't quite tell what was going on though. A few seconds later I see the actual only bad ass I went to HS with come over and grab one of the guys I hear him tell the kid to go pick up his fucking cars. The kids kind of scramble and I see they are picking up hotwheels all over the locker bay. He then makes the kids apologize to the handicapped kid.

They had been kicking his hot wheels around the locker bay while he tried to play with them. The mean kids leave and I see the bad ass guy start talking to the kid about Hot wheel cars. The rest of the school year the bad ass kid would bring hot wheels in for the handicapped kid, they would trade hot wheels, talk about hot wheels, buy each other hot wheels and even play with the hot wheels on the lunch tables. He spent so much time hanging out with this kid and his hot wheels. It was one of the most bad ass things I have ever seen.

15. way2funni made their best sale at a biker BBQ.

25 years ago I was a door to door encyclopedia salesman.

It's 4th of July. I'm in Cleveland - Mentor on the Lake to be precise.

Boss is pissed because the crew wasn't selling shit so he makes us work on 4th of July. I get dropped in a neighborhood about 3 blocks from the lake and I start knocking on doors.

I'm working my way down the street knocking on doors - nobody home, mostly.

And then I turn the corner and I can see where everyone is.

Big house with a HUGE backyard -and nothing but Harleys - probably 25-50 of them lined up and it's the whole cookout - roast pig thing happening.

Now in hindsight the whole scene was pretty chill. The wives and kids are all there. No gunfire or knifeplay in sight.

Just the same, there's no way in HELL am I knocking on this door. I'm doing my best to walk by and BE invisible.

Wasn't happening.

HEY YOU! . Of course it's the biggest barrel chested dude in leather I've ever seen. He looked like he could THROW a damn Harley at me. Hell, he looked like he just got done EATING A HARLEY. And he's looking RIGHT AT ME.

• Me?

YEAH YOU ! COME . HERE!

• you sure you mean me? I'm looking all around and behind me - the street is empty

BOY, DONT MAKE ME COME OVER THIS FENCE! GET THE FUCK OVER HERE.

OK. So I walk over. Hi.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD!

Ok. Now I think I just peed myself a little.

I uh, uh, uh, I'm like, a door to door salesman, you know?

NO SHIT MR. SLACKS AND SHIRT AND TIE WITH A FUCKING BACKPACK WALKING AROUND MY NEIGHBORHOOD - WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SELLING!

• encyclopedias and kids books - sir.

Really?

Yessir - and I open my bag and haul out a book and hand it to him.

He takes it and he's flipping though the pages and now he's talking to me - real conversational like.

..you see all these wives sitting out here with all the rugrats running around now don't you?

Uh huh. Yessir,

And you were just going to walk on by ?

Uhhuh Yessir.

You weren't going to knock on our door?

No. Nosir.

Are you sure?

Yessir.

Positive?

YESSIR!

WELL WHY THE FUCK NOT?

cue growls from assorted Pit Bulls and Rottweilers who had suddenly showed up because the word was out - come see what 'shit your pants fear' smells like.

Ok, Now I'm fucking positive. I've pissed myself.

He snaps the book shut.

Aw, I'm just fucking with you dude...

And with that he hollers over his shoulder - HEY , ANYONE WANNA BUY SOME FUCKING ENCYCLOPEDIAS N KIDS BOOKS AND SHIT?

And from the circle of wives, a voice spoke up.

'Whatcha got'?

And the dude turns back and says :

'See that? you're in - jump the fence dude'

10 seconds later I have a chair and a beer and a dozen bikers wives all leaning forward to see what I've got.

What makes the story even better is that I did actually write a deal and then they wouldn't let me leave until my boss showed up to pick me up.

And the roast pig was amazing. They fed me and fed me some more and everyone said goodbye when I left.

No kidding. Nicest people ever

16. chinoswagger is still grateful to the blood who helped his friend.

Once around noon I was hanging out at a skateshop when a blood just walked in and started complaining about how all the clothes are blue and how there wasn't enough red, the guy working who's super cool just said they would re-stock and he left.

Later that day towards 9pm my friend (15) and I (14) were at our local skatepark (it can get sketchy) when a cop rolled by the nearby basketball quart, afraid of what ever a cop might find on them everyone flooded out and into the skatepark.

My friend didn't see any of this happening and checked a text on his new iphone. All of a sudden three guys in their early twenties asked him to let them see his phone to call someone (take it and run) when he said no they started to corner him and throw punches all of a sudden the same blood from the skateshop that was smoking a joint on a nearby bench ran in calling them all pussies for jumping a kid and promptly beat the shit out of them. After they all ran away he kindly gave my friend five bucks for his troubles.

Tl:dr nice ass blood helped my friend from getting robbed and gave hime five bucks.

17. youngphi has AAA now.

I was at a gas station one day and pulled up to the pump, got out and realized that I wasn't close enough to the pump ( new car). So I got in, pulled up farther, got out and locked my door, leaving the car on ( keys in the ignition) and my then 6 month old baby in the car ( she thought it was hilarious). I called my insurance company (I have roadside assistance through them) and they were planning on taking 2 hours, I called the cops who said they could not help me.

Then this guy walks up sees me in near hysteria, and says he will call his "friend" to come down with a slim jim, it occurred to me as he called his subordinate and commanded him to arrive within the next 2 minutes that this dude was some serious kind of gang member with significant rank. I ignored their need for a slim jim as they broke into my car, freeing my still content child and allowing me to make it to work on time.

TL;DR I have AAA now

18. Crytone's uncle was always on good terms with the Hell's Angels.

My uncle told me this story. Many years ago, he was living in a place beside some Hells Angels. My uncle is a big guy and rides bikes too but back then he was riding, I believe, a Honda bike (cruiser type, not a crotch rocket).

Anyways, he said the HA guys would come help him fix his bike if they saw him working on it (my uncle loves tinkering with his toys). I guess they would bust his chops a bit for not driving American made but they were just nice people and enjoyed helping/working on bikes. He also said they had really good peanuts and would give him bags full of them all the time... Never understood that last part but I guess they were in the peanut business (for laundering purposes maybe?). He still says they are the best neighbors he ever has had - respectful, friendly and kind.

It should be noted that this is all happened in Canada.

19. melhow44 and their husband found home with The Outlaws.

My husband and I tow our camper from Florida to Tennessee twice a year to camp in the smokies. A good stopping point is an area called Locust Grove, GA - there's a cute overnight RV park close on I-75 and also the most kick-ass Mexican restaurant you'd never guess was in a strip mall where we like to grab a bite and a drink.

One night we got in a little late and were finishing up dinner and watching the debut of Favre playing for the Jets on TV at the Mexican place. The game went to the half, and the restaurant was closing up. We asked the waiter if he knew of anyplace we could catch the second half, and he pointed us to some bar across the interstate.

Off we go to a little nondescript place named The Grove seated in front of your typical interstate motel. There were just a handful of cars in the lot, but it still looked open, so we headed in. The waiter was right, they were showing the game on a big TV, so we grabbed some stools and ordered some beers. I get kind of loud watching football, especially if I've had a few, so I let out a few hootsandhollers, and the waitress heads over to see if we want another round.

I feel dumb at this point, because I'm in a strange bar with locals being sort of loud, so I apologize to the waitress. She replied in the heaviest, sweetest Georgia drawl "Baby, you're in a biker bar, you be as noisy as you want", and then went off to get our beers. That's when we took a good look around, and our dumba*ses realize we are in a real-life biker bar. Like, hard core. We notice a poker game in the back room, we see the biker flags hanging, we see the bikers at the bar in the shadows. Biker. Bar. Big time. But, also good football game, cold beers, and what feels to be a fairly non-threatening, laid back environment. So, we stay. Late. Really late. And get to know Kat the bartender, and others seated at the bar, who are all super nice.

We got invited back any time during our travels, in fact we learned many truckers stay in the parking lot of The Grove because it's convenient and they serve food. Kat told us we could "park our rig there anytime" which killed us, our camper was now "a rig" and to just call ahead and she'd have a hot meal waiting. She also said it's safer than the RV park, because "it's a biker bar, and no one will let you get fucked with if you're our guest". So, we now hit The Grove every time we pass through on I-75 if we can.

We learned in later visits that the gang whose bar that is are The Outlaws. They seem very nice, in fact the last time we were there they were hosting a charity event, a chili cook-off I think, for kids.

TL;DR Suburban couple stops in a bar on the way to go camping to see a football game - finds out it's a very friendly biker bar belonging to The Outlaws, goes back twice a year to say hello and have beers.

It could be the stars, it could be the gloomy SAD-stricken transition into winter, or perhaps the chaos of the impeachment hearings, whatever is going on - this week was more frustrating than trying to put on a pair of wet jeans with getting floor dust on them.

Regardless of whether you're planning to curl up with a good book or party the stress away, it's important to transition out of the week work brain so you can fully melt into the Friday abyss.

And what better way to shake off the week than by reading tweets from funny people also trying to pull themselves back from the brink of insanity?

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