Quantcast
Channel: someecards.com
Viewing all 38991 articles
Browse latest View live

10 former child beauty pageant contestants share the ugly things that happened behind-the-scenes.

$
0
0

The only thing in the world more dangerous than a Stage Mom is a Pageant Mom.

Former beauty queens who survived the pageant circuit shared their stories of the drama that goes on backstage under the clouds of hairspray, and it was ironically the only page on Reddit that wasn't full of JonBenét Ramsey jokes.

Not every toddler with a tiara ends up with a spinoff like Honey Boo Boo Child—some people simply end up with a trophy shelf and emotional trauma, and they're full of cautionary tales. Don't trust the Oreos.

1. averym88 kept it real, and then was injured on stage.

when i was about four my mom put me in a pageant. she refused to put any makeup on me, put me in clothes from the gap, and kept me all natural. i ended up winning against all the glitzy little girls and when the announcer pulled me off stage - he popped my shoulder out of my socket and i had to go to the emergency room. they invited me back but my mom was furious and i never did them again.


2.​​​​​​ irishrose7777 met a pageant mom straight outta Drop Dead Gorgeous.

The majority of people I met in pageants were nice, but there were one or two I could do without. One pageant I ended up winning my division over a girl I'd been in a pageant or two with before. When I got to the dressing room afterwards to change, her mother was ranting about me winning, saying it was rigged, I didn't deserve it, ect. I honestly didn't care, and my mom didn't want to get involved so she was just trying to help me get out of there as soon as possible. Another mom told her to watch her mouth, and she flew off the handle. She started SCREECHING and ranting, calling me a b*tch and all of that. My mom scurried me out of the room, and as we got to the door the other mom flung her daughter's trophy at me, missed, and it hit the wall so hard that the marble split in two. I actually saw the daughter at another pageant and a cheer competition, it was awkward.


3. zombiemommybot's mom sounds like a narcissistic zombie robot.

My mom started me in pageants before I was a year old. I was forced to do them until I was 12. As early as I can remember I hated them. Straight up bawling my eyes out while getting hair and makeup done which got me yelled at and spanked in circles a lot. There were no best moments, I hated every bit of it and its seriously caused a lot of resentment towards my mother.


4. downinfragglerock succinctly summed up the best and worst parts.

Best - Frilly dresses. Trophies. New friends, many of whom came from money, and had lots of sleepovers and pool parties.

Worst - Sponge rollers. I'm sure cheerleaders and dancers can relate.


5. KittanLuvr was in a cutthroat world of attempted sabotage.

I remember there being a huge plate of Oreos backstage and none of the other girls were eating them. I thought "wow, I am so lucky. I'm going to eat all of them." Before I get to the plate my Mom came backstage and saw what I was about to do, she told me "those were put there because they know Oreos will f*ck up your smile.. it's a trick, don't eat them."

That kind of sucked.


6. She also has a talent for roasting.

Another time I was 5 and this bratty little girl who's family obviously had tons of money ran up to me and said "You're no competition to me, you're UGLY." My 5 year old mind snapped back so quickly and said "You're the ugly one, fat nose," making my entire family and families around me laugh while she ran away obviously fighting back tears.


7. The twist? gangrenous_ghoul is a GUY.

Here's a shocker. My mom forced me to do a BOYS youth pageant. I seriously have no idea what the hell she was thinking. But I remember a lot of boys showing up for the practices and whatnot. The grand prize was a HUGE, massive collection of 1000 matchbox/hot wheels cars. I remember thinking that was really cool because I was only like 6 years old at the time. Then time for the pageant came and went to the elementary school auditorium. I wore a little black tuxedo with a carnation. When I arrived there was only one other boy there.


8. Only in the pageant world is the age of ten considered "old age," makemeastar.

I was in a pageant once. Kind of an old age. I was ten. I realized that I sucked at speaking on the spot. In the interview part, I came up with a crappy answer to "If you had one wish, what would it be?" I said... Ummm well, I'd have to say a million dollars. I SHOULD HAVE SAID WORLD PEACE! But I would have hated myself even more if I would have done that. But it was really fun because I was asked to come back as an escort for an older category pageant and that was really fun! It wasn't a glitz pageant and it was really small. I mean, there were only six trophies and five participants. I thought it was fun. It wasn't scarring at all and my mom was, for the most part, normal through out the whole thing.


9. Welcome to puberty, sonnejotunn. It only gets worse from here.

I was just starting to go through puberty and I had progressed out of the stick-thin stage a lot of young girls go through in childhood. One of the "pageant moms" walked up to me when I was getting dressed and pinched my stomach, hard.

"What's that," she said, smirking, "a little bit of FLAB?"

Until that day I never felt self-conscious about my body before. She told me the judges wouldn't like me if I didn't "cut down on the doughnuts, princess!"

I was in tears. I never went back. I was having fun pretending to be a princess and they made me feel worthless just because my body was changing and I wasn't thin as a rail anymore.


10. Honesty is the best policy, imemanon.

I was in a pageant actually 2 months ago and my division was ages 16-19. We were asked a question on stage that we had to answer. The question was what was our biggest goal in life. Everyone said stuff like "I want to go to college" or "I want to be myself" but this one girl walks up in her ball gown and straight up says, in front of an audience of about 200 people, "I want to stop doing drugs" and did her model walk all cheerful and walked off stage like it was not big deal.


20 people share the funniest things they've heard yelled in a movie theater.

$
0
0

In theory, having other people yell things out during a movie viewing is supremely annoying. After all, what's the point of all of those long-winded announcements if not to tell people to shut their traps and let others enjoy the silver screen?!

However, there is an exception to every rule, and most of us have heard a stranger yell something hilarious at a movie at least once. Sometimes they're cutting a tense moment with a proper lambasting, other times they're making an on-screen joke even funnier, and other times they're having their own personal meltdown.

In a popular Reddit thread, people shared the funniest things they've heard shouted at movie theaters, and it proves why it's so great to see films in the presence of strangers.

1. Lukos1123 watched a man truly experience Inception.

Was watching inception, second night out, there was a power failure in the planning scene. Pause then emergency lighting comes on and a guy down the front jumps up screams "IT WAS ALL A DREAM" and runs out of the theater.

2. Nguyener loves Mortal Kombat man.

A guy yelled "MORTAL KOMBAT!!!!!!!!!!!" at the top of his lungs when the credits started rolling from the first Mortal Kombat movie. It sounded just like the original voice. I was like, seven years old at the time, but I will never forget it.

3. Joon01 did not in fact eat the usher's heart.

Went to a midnight showing of X-Men 3 a few years back. Sat through 15 minutes of previews, the production company logos started and seemed all wrong, too ritzy for X-Men. Sure enough, we were watching The Da Vinci Code. A hail of boos and popcorn fell in the theater. Somebody started making shadow puppets on the screen.

A minute later, an usher came in to tell us they'll take care of it quickly. Just as he started to talk, a guy in the front row stood up, turned toward the crowd, threw his fist in the air and shouted, "Let's eat his heart!" The usher left and came back with the manager to deliver the message.

4. abd897 was surrounded by fanboys.

When I went to see the opening midnight screening of Revenge of the Sith the theatre was unsurprisingly packed with hardcore fanboys (including the usual lightsaber wielding diehards). About 5 minutes in, movie gets muted and one of the employees asks if a little boy was in the theatre because his parents were looking for him.

The crowd of fanboys start yelling saying they didn't care and booed the employee out of the place. Right before the movie gets unmuted someone yelled "I GOT OUT OF THE BASEMENT FOR THIS SH*T?!" and the crowd lost it for about a minute.

5. 09Customx's buddy made the movie even more fun.

While watching mirrors, during the scene where Amy Smart rips her own jaw off my buddy shouted "why the long face?". Everyone went from being grossed out to laughing their a*ses off pretty much instantly.

6. cposs's fellow movie goer made Spiderman far more worth it.

One or two people started clapping at the end of Spiderman 3, and the 250+ lb man behind me shouted "Don't even start that s*it". That was the only entertaining thing I had experienced for 2 hours.

7. istguy witnessed a glorious exchange between two LOTR fans.

At the end of "The Fellowship of the Ring" (Frodo and Sam walk off to Mordor together), somebody yelled:

"That ending sucked!!"

After a few seconds of silence, another man on the other side of the theater yelled:

"It's a trilogy, you a*shole!"

8. mr_marmoset watched a man freak out about Edward Cullen's sparkle chest.

Twilight (or one of the sequels, I can't remember.) - when Edward Cullen takes his shirt off in the sun in some Mediterranean city and he sparkles. This guy, obviously dragged there by his gf, just screams "ARE YOU F*CKING SERIOUS? FUCK THIS SH*T. I'M GOING HOME.", then he stormed out leaving his gf in the cinema. She didn't follow him either.

9. Gouka heard a man with a realization.

Near the end of the first Iron man the agent guy says, "Just call us SHIELD". A guy sitting near by apparently wasn't ready for that revelation because he said rather loudly, "Hooo-leeeee Sh*t".

10. ryoshi heard someone who was ready to throw out the baby with the bathwater.

During paranormal activity 2:

F*CK THE BABY! save yourself stupid.

11. Wharve was in a theater full of hilarious haters.

At a midnight showing for Scott Pilgrim there was a preview for Devil and right when M. Night Shyamalan's name popped up the entire audience erupted into boos and whatnot. Then someone yelled out "the twist is at the beginning of the movie!".

12. MisterUNO was ready to see Neo escape the trappings of the Matrix more efficiently.

The fight scene in Matrix 2, when Neo is fighting hundreds of copies of Agent Smith. At the end of the scene when Neo flies away to escape someone shouted "WHY DIDN'T HE DO THAT AT THE START OF THE FIGHT?"

13. nolikecelery has a few funny ones.

1. My brothers and I were seeing "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" (2005). When Charlie was opening the first chocolate bar, someone yelled "SH*T!" the very second that Charlie realized the golden ticket wasn't there.

2. We were all at War of the Worlds, the Tom Cruise one, and it was absolutely packed. When he was sleeping, or had fallen asleep in the chair, and the aliens were about to lurk in, someone shouted "WAKE UP, TOM!" -- I thought people would be pissed off, but everyone in the theater lost it.

14. OccupiedArrest was in an audience that knew how to work with the screen.

Watching Halloween Resurrection at the ghetto theater. At the end they kill Michael, and of course he comes back once last time. Just before making the final killing blow Busta Rhymes says "Trick or treat..." and before he can finish the whole theater shouts, "MOTHER F*CKER!"

15. SmokeyDawg2814 had an incredible Saw experience.

When I went to see Saw (first one) in theaters at a midnight show that was a mostly black audience, and well, they yelled a lot. Made the movie really fun. Best line was when the mother being held hostage took the gun away from her kidnapper. This fat lady in front of me stood up and started screaming, "SHOOT THAT B*TCH A*S N*GGA! SHOOT HIS ASS! HE AIN'T NUTHIN' BUT A B*TCH"

It was f*cking incredible.

16. kodie131 had an ideal Harry Potter experience.

Me and my friends saw the midnight screening of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix and at the end when Harry says, "We've got one thing Voldemort doesn't have..." my friend yelled out, "NOSES!" and the theater exploded with laughter.

17. Tikay's friend is a consistent troll.

I'm assuming that all theaters have some version of the "don't talk during the move" preview. AMC (in Phx, AZ) has one where there is people talking, cell phones beeping, someone laughing and then a baby crying and the announcer says "Please don't ruin the move by adding your own soundtrack"

Every time we take a friend of ours to the theater, he has the tendency to yell at the screen "Will someone turn that baby off"

18. JMango witnessed two women who know how to find each other.

After the movie started and the theater was dark a girl came in holding some concession stand stuff and yelled "Marco!". Another girl near the back yelled "Polo!" and the first girl walked up to sit with her friend.

19. deselby12 had a great Snakes on Plane experience.

At the exact moment David Koechner got killed in Snakes on a Plane, some dude in the back of the theatre yelled "WHAMMY!"

20. KNesbitt11 had the best fellow movie goers at The Mist.

My friend and I were watching The Mist, where an alien-like thing attacks and kills a bunch of people. There's a group of people in the movie that are hiding in a grocery store when a black man from the group decides to go outside into the Mist, where he immediately dies and his blood is splattered everywhere.

A large group of black people behind us shouted an array of things, including:

-WHY IT ALWAYS GOTTA BE THE BLACK MAN THAT DIE FIRST?

-N*GGA DON'T GO OUT THERE I WARNING YA!

-AWWW SHIII

TSA officer accidentally gropes female passenger thinking she's male and then asks her to dinner.

$
0
0

Here's a story you wouldn't think would have a happy ending: a TSA officer accidentally groped a female passenger, thinking she was male. And yet, against all odds, his "mortifying" mistake turned out well for both of them.

Please fasten your seatbelts. It's going to be a turbulent ride with a smooth landing.

A TSA officer was working late during a period of bad weather last year during the week before Christmas. He was manning the full-body scanner (aka "space tube thingy") when he saw a "teenage boy" who he guessed to be 13 or 14 years old approaching with a man and woman who he guessed were "his" parents.

So, I work for the TSA, and have for a few years now. It's a good job overall. I'm underpaid, but the benefits are nice, and I get overtime when I want it.

A little over a year ago, during the week leading up to Christmas, we had some really bad weather that delayed all the flights. I volunteered to stay late so that my coworkers could go home to their families. Most of the work was done anyway, so it was mostly just standing around waiting for the odd latecomer

I was working the AIT (the space tube thingy), when three passengers came up together, a middle-aged man, a middle-aged woman, and a teenage boy. I figure it's a family traveling together for the holidays, and go about my work.

Mom goes through, all is fine. Dad goes through, all is fine.

Kid comes up, I get a good look at him. Hoodie, sweatpants, shortish hair, smooth face. I figure he's about 13, maybe 14.

The scanner lit up over the "boy's" chest region, so the TSA officer told him he would have to give him a pat down. "He" looked nervous, but complied. As the officer was patting down the chest region, he suddenly realized he had his hand on the chest of an adult woman.

I hit the button, direct him to wait with me for a moment, and then gesture to the screen, which lit up on his chest area.

I tell him that I have to pat that area down. He's a little nervous, I figure that because he's so young, this is probably his first time getting a pat down, but he says okay, and I start the patdown.

I do the left side of the chest, and feel some moob, which catches me off guard because he didn't look chubby at all.

I move to the right side of the chest, read what's on the hoodie, and it all clicks at once. The hoodie has the name of the local college on it. This is an adult, not a child. He's not wearing sweatpants, *she* is wearing yoga pants. She doesn't even know the couple that just came through.

He immediately pulled his hand back and called his female supervisor over. He explained the situation to her, and she finished screening the adult female passenger herself.

I look at her face, which is bright red, my hand is still on her boob, and I pull it back like I just got bit by a snake.

I immediately call for my supervisor, who comes over and asks what's wrong, and I explain the situation to her.

My supervisor covers her mouth, and at first I thought she was absolutely mortified, but then I realized she's trying not to laugh.

She takes a minute to pull herself together, tells me to go take a break, and finishes screening the passenger herself.

The officer then apologized to the passenger, who said she understood, having been mistaken for a boy in the past. He then went to find out from his supervisor if he would be fired, but she said it was an "honest mistake" and that she would have his back if the passenger filed an official complaint.

Once that was done, I apologize to the passenger, she tells me it's fine, that it wasn't the first time she was mistaken for a boy, and she probably should have said something before I started touching her. I leave her alone, and go talk to my supervisor to figure out exactly how fired I am.

She tells me to calm down, that it was just an honest mistake, and that she has my back if the passenger files an official complaint, but that probably won't happen, and I shouldn't be worried.

Although this reassured him, he still felt like an "absolute monster" who had "ruined Christmas." So when he encountered his "hapless victim" waiting for her flight, he went to apologize again. Turns out, her flight had been delayed until morning and she would be there all night. So he offered to buy her dinner.

That reassured me a little, but I still groped a woman and ruined Christmas, so I feel like an absolute monster.

I swallow my shame, and finish my shift, then I go into the airport proper to find some food, because I just finished a twelve hour shift and there's no way I have the energy to cook dinner.

I saw my hapless victim sitting at her gate, waiting for her flight. I went up to her to apologize again, and saw that the flight had been delayed until morning (it was about eleven at night).

I apologize again, she says it's fine, and I ask her if she's planning to stay the whole night. She says she has to, all the hotels in the area are book.

I tell her that I'm getting some dinner, and offer to get her some food as well. After all, I already got to second base, I think it's only fair that I buy her dinner.

She agrees, and we go to one of the restaurants that is open late, get some food, and start eating.

At dinner, she said she gets "mistaken for a boy a lot." And he shared about how, when he was younger, he had long hair and was often mistaken for a woman. At the end of dinner, she said that "all was forgiven" with one caveat: he would take her on a real date when she returned from her trip.

She said she gets mistaken for a boy a lot, and it's not a big deal. I told her about how I had long hair and no beard in college, and at the gym people would frequently walk into the men's bathroom, see me, and do a double take to make sure they didn't walk into the ladies' room.

She laughed, and we ended up talking for a few hours, before I finally told her that I had to get home, and apologized again for the accidental molestation.

She said that all is forgiven, if I promise to take her on a real date when she gets back.

He immediately started texting her, and picked her up at the airport when she got back. They have been officially dating ever since.

I agreed, she gave me her phone number, and I went home, and immediately started texting her. We kept talking until her flight finally left, and when she got back I picked her up at the airport, and a few days later took her on that date that I promised her.

We just celebrated our one year anniversary.

She has long hair now.

He summed it up with this tl;dr:


Thought an adult woman was a teenage boy, touched her on the boob, everything worked out better than expected.

The story was shared on Reddit's "Today I F*cked Up" forum, where it's getting quite a lot of attention.

Not everyone is "oohing and awwwing" at this love story. Some people think the origins make it pretty creepy.

takatori writes:

"I'm dating someone I thought was a young boy when we met."

<backs away slowly>

Others are pointing out the problematic message behind the story.

Kangar writes:

Grab a boob, and you might just meet your future wife.

And PaytonT06 writes:

So what your telling me is all u have to do to get a girlfriend I just have to become a TSA agent molest a women then buy her dinner? Yeah never mind scratch that.

While others are jealous.

BrokenPaw writes:

I've been inappropriately touched on my butt by, like, three different TSA guys on three separate trips through Denver, and not once has any of them offered to buy me dinner.

Gotta be honest, I feel a little left out.

But some people find it "weirdly" sweet.

delphian44 writes:

Weirdly wholesome content.

And whatthebuzzz writes:

Wasn’t expecting that ending, made me smile for him

Some people think the whole story is B.S.—which is entirely possible.

yildizli_gece writes:

I cannot believe how many people believe this is real.

Sorry--not buying a story about someone mistaking yoga pants for sweats (yoga pants are form-fitting!), and she spoke and you didn't recognize that her voice was that of a young woman, and that she agreed to have a meal with you after you found her and questioned whether she was there--alone--all night.

She is either the most trusting woman ever or this is all BS.

Is it really so hard to believe that two people could find love in the TSA line?!?!??? Yes, yes it is. But I still really want it to be true.

Mom asks if she's wrong for refusing husband's request to 'thank' him for taking care of their baby.

$
0
0

Being a parent is a full time job...

If you're considering having a child, but you're only interested in working part time, it's probably best that you just sit this one out. If you're in a relationship, working with your partner to be the best team of parents you can be is critical and while it is fun, it can also be a bit of a messy challenge.

If you're a mom and you're the main caretaker of your children, having your husband watch the kids isn't "babysitting," it's just being a dad. Watching over children is hard, sticky, exhausting, and sometimes painful. You get spit on, sneezed on, vomited on and you're forced to constantly prevent them from hurting themselves. If you have a mentally and physically taxing job, you come home to a different kind of mentally and physically taxing job.

So, when a recent Reddit user asked the moral compass of the internet's "Am I the As*hole?" section, "AITA for not thanking my husband for taking care of the baby?" people were ready to help.

AITA for not thanking my husband for taking care of the baby?

I'm on maternity leave. My husband works 4 10's. After work today I told him to feed the baby and distract him if he gets fussy so that I could have a chance to go through my clothes. I'm returning to work soon and I still have some baby weight so I need to see if anything fits. I can technically do this while my husband is at work but the kiddo was really fussy and I was working through a new recipe so I didn't have the time.

Later on in the evening my husband made a comment about how he didn't get to rest after work and how I didn't even thank him for helping me out tonight. I got upset and said that spending time with his child is not a favor he's doing for me, it's just being a parent. He said that on the days he is working, the kiddo should be my responsibility since I'm on maternity leave and I have time to rest during the day.

I put in way more than 40 hours a week taking care of the baby and I even sleep in a separate room so the nightly feedings don't wake my husband up. I just get so sick of being "on-call" all the time. Sometimes I just want to focus on a task for a few hours without having to drop everything to feed or play with the baby... I feel guilty for reacting so negatively now. He really is the most amazing person and he works so hard to give us a great life. I make it a point to acknowledge the effort he puts in and thank him for everything he does which is why he made that comment about not thanking him for helping. AITA for expecting him to interact with the baby on some of the days he works and not seeing it as a favor he's doing for me?

"Dusty_Dinkelman" wrote:

Your husband should realize he’s the co-parent of the child. You asked for something pretty minuscule and he’ll have to get used to it for many years to come. I mean come on. There doesn’t need to be thanks. It’s implied that he’s helping and you can work on organizing your clothes.

"Silentboatman" wrote:

It takes two people to make a baby and a village to raise it. Op is def NTA (Not the As*hole) and husband needs to learn that taking care of his own child isn't deserving of a thank you. It's a bare minimum function. It's like fathers who say "I'm babysitting" no you're not you're being a parent. TF is wrong with some people.

"adrionallama" wrote:

The other day my husband did the dishes and said to our son “look how I helped mommy with the dishes!” He genuinely thought he was modeling good behavior so our son would grow up to help with the chores.

I told him that was nice, but to be careful of implying that the chores are my job and that it’s something the other family members “help” with. As if they deserve praise every time they “help” me.

The funniest part about this exchange was that the dishes my husband “helped” me with was 100% his own mess.

"amazingmikenyc" wrote:

yeah you need to point out that caring for a little one is a full-time job too, and that you're as entitled to rest as much as him! When my wife was off on maternity I would take over when I got in from work - sometimes it was annoying because I was exhausted but often so was my wife so I sucked it up and usually enjoyed hanging with my son for an hour or 2.

Hopefully he is just ignorant and hasn't really thought about it properly. Does he have any manfriends who have had similar experiences who can sort him out (I say this because sometimes it is better to have such constructive criticism come from a 3rd party)

"findingreddit" wrote:

if he feels entitled to ‘time out’ after a certain amount of hours worked, then he can also schedule your ‘time out’ hours for the work you do. If he feels entitled be thanked for taking care of his child, then I sure hope he comes home and thanks you every single day for doing the same.

I’m sure he’s a lovely husband in most other ways & nobody is perfect. But you need to address this attitude now or it will forever be a cross you need to bear.

"chinatowngirl" wrote:

I think it's pretty rich that he clearly doesn't consider her being home all day taking care of their child as "work", yet he thinks of it as work when he has to do it.

"Martian_Pudding" wrote:

So, there you have it! This mom is 100% not the as*hole in this situation and her husband is going to have to step up his dad game ASAP.

The best jokes about Planters killing Mr. Peanut to try and sell more peanuts.

$
0
0

It is with a heavy heart I report to you the passing of Mr. Peanut, the famous lovechild of the Monopoly Man and a legume.

The Mr. Peanut Twitter account rebranded as "The Estate of Mr. Peanut" and announced the fictional upperclasspeanut's death with a special mourning monocle and an emoji for the occasion. Mr. Peanut is said to have "sacrificed himself to save his friends when they needed him most," which is surprising, considering the fact that his whole mission in life was to telling people to eat his friends' corpses and profiting off of their demise.

Mr. Peanut died after a Nutmobile accident threw him and his friends Wesley Snipes and Matt Walsh over a cliff, and he let go of a branch as not to weigh them down.

As you can see in the commercial, Mr. Peanut died doing what he loved: selling peanuts.

AdAge reports that funeral for the 106-year-old spokesnut has been scheduled for the third quarter of the Super Bowl, the most-watched live television event of the year, so millions of people can pay their respects.

While companies such as Gilette razors have pivoted to wokeness to make waves with their Super Bowl commercials, Planters Peanuts' decision to pivot to grief is the first of its kind.

This is sad news for everybody, but especially Terry Jones, the Monty Python icon who is now the Farrah Fawcett to Mr. Peanut's Michael Jackson.

The stunt was successful, as Mr. Peanut is now the number one trend, despite being fake and a legume.

The timing of his death and his socio-economic status have dozens of people making "Epstein didn't kill himself"-style jokes. Not to be salty, but everyone is making the same joke.

People are also criticizing the obvious stunt, playing on our emotional attachments to an anthropomorphic legume just to get us talking about peanuts.

This mom, for example, is not on board.

We all mourn our fake friends in our own fake ways.

31 people share the creepy 'supernatural' things they experienced and can't explain.

$
0
0

Most of the things that happen in life can be explained by evolution and science. But then every so often something happens that defies it all, forcing you to question everything and making you wonder if maybe there is some kind of other-worldly realm that might overlap with this one. These are the "glitch in the Matrix" moments that can be terrifying or thrilling, or both.


Someone asked Reddit: "What's your creepiest 'glitch in the matrix' or unexplainable thing that's ever happened to you?" Here are 27 people sharing the creepy "supernatural" things that happened to them that can't be explained by science or logic.

Warning: might make you question everything.

1.) From theMan_theBeard:

When I was a teenager, my family lived in a big 115 year old brick house. Plenty of creepy stuff happened but one night I was heading to bed when the door between the first floor kitchen and the basement stairs absolutely SLAMMMMMMED shut. It had a unique sound that I recognized immediately as the kitchen/basement door.

There were no windows open that could've caused a draft. Our dog was asleep on the second floor. I was on the second floor. My parents were both asleep in the third floor attic (had been converted to a master bedroom).

None of us could've shut the door.

Fuckin terrified, I worked up the courage to go investigate, carrying my hilariously teeny pocket knife for protection. As I went downstairs I turned on every light.

When I reached the kitchen, the door was wide open.

Even more freaked out I ran back up to bed (leaving the lights on).

A minute or two later, I heard a definite "sssshhhh ok ok" from downstairs.

I laid in bed and was ready to accept my demise.

Eventually I somehow feel asleep and in the morning I was there first downstairs (I woke up before my parents and dog) and found that the lights were all off and the basement door had been shut again.

2.) From Adventuredepot:

Removed a painting from the wall during a late evening cleaning, put it away and returned to the wall to see a never before seen painting on the same spot, put a chill down my spine.

3.) From cowgirlinthesand2:

Weird but happy. About 5 years ago in November we lost our family dog to cancer. She was the dog my children grew up with, loved by all. At the next Christmas, at the end of the day of gifts, food and family, as I was picking up, I found a tiny pewter dog figurine sitting on the mantel. I asked everyone who had been at the house that day if they left it. No one had. Okay, weird, but took it as a good omen. When my eldest went back to college at the end of that Christmas break, he asked if he could take the little figurine, to remember his dog. Of course, I said yes. A week or two later, picking up around the house, there was the figurine again! I called my son, and said, “You forgot the dog figurine!” He said, “No I didn’t, it’s right in front of me on my desk!” I had now found a second figurine!! Again, no one claimed any knowledge of it. No idea how....but I still have the two of them tucked away on a shelf to this day.

4.) From BanditSixActual:

This happened around 1991. It's the middle of the night. I'm standing in my sister's living room and it must be a full moon, because even though it's around 1am and the lights are off, I can see clearly. There's a mixing bowl with popcorn kernels in the bottom on the floor in front of the tv and some rental VHS in a pile nearby. I hear a noise and turn around to see my sister's normally very friendly labrador retriever looking like Cujo. Fangs bared, snarling, hackles raised. Suddenly there's a bright flash of light and I wake up like I hit the bed from a great height. I think "That was a weird dream." Eventually, I fall back to sleep and in the morning I call my sister, planning to tell her the story, but she preempts me by telling me about the weird thing that happened in the night.

They woke up to the sound of the dog snarling at about 1am. Her husband thought there was a prowler in the house, got a gun and went to find the dog. She was standing in the living room snarling at the middle of the room. He couldn't see anyone, so he flipped on the light. No one was there, the dog instantly stopped snarling and walked to her bed like nothing had happened. He checked the property and went back to bed.

We talked a bit and I found out they watched some rental movies and "Of course we had popcorn, why?" My sister is a little woowoo at times, so I decided not to tell her about my night. She lived about 450 miles away by the way.

5.) From mrsbmw330xi:

I was on vacation on Florida visiting a friend, we were walking on the beach on a perfectly sunny day when everything went black for a second. I think it was weird but explained it away thinking that my eyes were playing tricks on me until he looked at me and said "did everything go black for a second?"

6.) From kerwapple:

I remember being pretty young like 9 or 10 and I was the car park of a pub in England (Southend). I remember seeing someone in their teens in the window of a house looking over the car park. They waved at me and I felt like I knew them somehow. My parents asked who I was waving at and I said just some lady in the window over there. Didn’t think much of it. Fast forward 10 years. I was at my nans new house. I remember walking into her room (which I never was allowed to do) going to the window. I then realised I was in the house looking over that same parking lot and remembering that interaction years before. Then a girl around 9 or 10 who was in said car park waved at me and I waved back. I felt like I knew her.

Could not explain it and have never told anyone about it. It freaked me out.

7.) From Dolios6757:

When I played baseball as a kid, they were handing out the trophies at the end of the season. They called out the names of the kids while we received our trophies. They're happened to be a kid with the same name as me. We met after the ceremony because it was weird since our last name isn't a very common one. We had the same birthday and everything. We looked alike, both our Dad's were named Derek and both of our sisters were named Lilly. As a kid, I found it cool. As an adult, I find it cool and also disturbing

8.) From nithararith:

One day when I was about 8 I didn't go to school because I was sick. My friend was suppoused to bring me homework etc. but he never came. My granddad came home from work and he told me that that friend was dead, I was devastated. That night I had a dream. I was with my friend at a playground next to our school and we were talking, then he told me that he is safe and it didn't hurt when that car hit him. The next day my mother wanted to talk to me about that situation and she asked me if I wanted to know what happened. I told her that I know everything because my friend told me. She thought that my granddad told me but he did not. He said that he did not wanted to tell me without her knowing it. That night I had a dream again and I was talking to him again. We were playing and having fun and he told me that he really had to go and we wont see each other ever again. The next day was his funeral and I really havent had a dream about him ever since.

9.) From Thin-Man:

So, back in 2016, I was injured at work and for about six months my life consisted of going to physical therapy and being confined to bed until I could walk again. With that in mind, I had a lot of time to read books. One of the books that I was reading was “Ex-Heroes”, by Peter Clines.

Now I don’t know about anyone else, but when I read a book I like to “cast” the characters in my head, coming up with how they look. One of the minor characters in this book was named Ilya and, because I know someone named Ilya, and because the book is set in Los Angeles where I live, the Ilya in the book became the Ilya that I knew in my imagination. But then, something strange started to happen. The Ilya in the book made specific references to movies like “Aliens”, a movie which the Ilya I know is a huge fan of. The Ilya in the book was a big fan of firearms, as the Ilya that I know is. Put into words, these details seem slim, but there was something so strange about the character in this book that I eventually reached out to the Ilya that I knew to ask about it.

Turns out that Ilya knows the author, Peter Clines, who had put him in the book! What are the odds that I would choose to buy a random book, with a story that takes place essentially on my street in Los Angeles, and features someone I know in real life as a minor character? That blew my mind, and it’s easily one of the most surreal experiences I’ve had.

10.) From friendshipwins:

This summer I bought my girlfriend a last-minute birthday trip to go kayaking around the San Juan Islands off the Washington state coast. After a long drive and ferry trip, we found the tour group of about 20 people and were then shuffled into a shuttle van for a ride to the beach.

Now, my girlfriend has a unique name similar to the name of a famous painter. Let's say it's Rebecca Warhol just for fun (it's not). She's a little ray of sunshine, and started chatting with the middle aged woman sitting next to her on the shuttle as we waited to leave. The woman noted that she had always loved the name Rebecca, as it was her mother's name. They made pleasant small talk in the van until the tour guide passed around the sign-in sheet for all of us to fill out. That's when things got strange.

My girlfriend wrote her full name on the sheet and passed it on to the woman, who immediately shouted "Oh my God," and started crying. After a few minutes of total confusion, she told us "Rebecca Warhol was my mother's full name, and these islands were her favorite place in the world. She passed away this summer from cancer and we've traveled hundreds of miles to spread her ashes here." We were STUNNED. I literally picked a random date, time, and tour company, and THEN we were split into the same group as this woman AND my girlfriend was sitting right next to her on the shuttle. What the hell? She continued by saying, "My daughter told us that Nana Rebecca would be with us on this trip, and I didn't believe it until now." It was the most unbelievable coincidence we had ever experienced, and has totally convinced me that there's more to this world than we think. As my brother later said, the Universe winked at us that day.

11.) From Watermelly3:

About two years ago, I went to collect my husband from the ferry after work. My husband got into the car and as I was driving very slowly out of the car park we both noticed two people standing a few metres in front of our car. It looked as though they were strangers, older looking professionals, both walking to their separate cars in different areas of the car park. The man was reaching into his side bag and the lady was further ahead than the man, with her head turned to the right. I know the exact positions they were in because they were completely frozen on the spot! My husband and I sat there watching the frozen strangers, not saying anything to each other and then all of a sudden it was like someone pressed play and the two strangers just continued on like nothing had happened. My husband and I promised to each other that we would never forget how weird the experience was. I can't remember exactly how long they stayed frozen like that but it was long enough to freak us both out!

12.) From MckayofSpades:

Every night I go to bed about two hours before my husband. I always wake up when he comes into the room. One night he was gaming with a friend and it was hours later I heard him sneak into the room and crawl across the floor so he could pop up and scare me. I felt the floor kind of shake and felt him bump clumsily against the side of the bed in the dark. I held out my hand and asked him not to scare me, I was already scared enough and begged him to just take my hand and come to bed. I couldn’t see anything in the room, but knew he was there and just waited for him to jump up so I could move on and go back to sleep. That’s when I heard him talking to his friend in the other room. I was frozen. I know there’s sleep paralysis or lucid dreaming or something that explains this, but I would have sworn on my sons life that someone had crawled across the floor and jostled the bed.

Eventually I worked out of the fear enough to grab my phone and text my husband to come in and turn on the lights and check under the bed. But holy shit, it boggles me how real it felt.

13.) From taterbugg82:

Two things. Each was witnessed by at least one other person and both were while driving. Once at a stop sign in a neighborhood. All of these little sparkles started swirling around in mid air roughly 3-4 ft off the ground out of nowhere. The group of them were roughly 2 ft wide by 3-4 ft tall. It lasted 3-5 seconds and then they were gone. No one was around and when I asked my passenger if he saw it too he breathed a sigh of relief and said yes. We spoke about it a little more but there is no reasonable explanation. The second happened when myself and 3 friends were driving down an empty country road. Very straight stretch. A man on a bike appeared. Someone said to watch out for him, so not to hit him and then he disappeared. Our minds were blown to say the least. Just “poof” and he’s gone.

14.) From HoldTheChimichanga:

I died. I saw it, I lived it. Either it was another world with a version of me that died I saw or I'm going crazy but I DIED.

We had a pep rally in school and after it was finished we had to go back to class. Well, my friend and I were not into that so we wanted to to across the street to Sonic. Across the school there is not heavy traffic, but if you don't pay attention you could get hit.

Well I remember walking with him and he dropped something so I went across the street first. I just saw a red Tahoe heading right for me and I got hit.

I remember everything. I remember gasping for air, I remember waking up and sleeping again. Then nothing. All of a sudden I was back in the stadium again and the EXACT SAME WORDS came out of the principal's mouth. My friend wanted to go get sonic but i was freaking out. Was asking him everything.

I thought it had to be a dream, so I went with him just to see what would happen. He dropped his stuff again and I waited. To my horror, that same red Tahoe showed up. I told him that I'm going back to school, I ain't dying again.

I can still see the other version of me on that street just messed up. Not even moving.

15.) From _Diakoptes:

A friend and I went to a buddy's house for a bday party. Stayed up playing halo 2 and hanging out. We all crash in the basement.

R (friend who came with me) and I got up at the same time. Not like one after eachother, we both got up at the same time after being asleep for a few hours and rushed to the bathroom.

R was more athletic than me (probably still is) and beat me there. I ran upstairs, barely getting my head over the toilet before puking my guts out. R was doing the same thing in the basement. I was wearing a wooden cross my grandmother mailed me from Romania (I'm not religious but I appreciated the gift as I had never met her at that point). Cross somehow became detached from the cord, fell on the tile and broke into two pieces.

So we both call our respective mothers and get picked up. By now it's like 3-4am.

Felt sick up until we left the house. Once I was in the car and a few blocks away, felt perfectly fine.

R reported the same thing to me that day over MSN Messenger. Felt perfectly fine after a few blocks.

Got the pictures developed a few weeks later. Theres a picture of us on the couch rocking some Halo and the whole room looks like it's filled with mist. Super spooky. I've been looking for the pic for a long time and I can't seem to find it anymore, but every few years my sister and I search my mom's photo albums for it.

16.) From setyh:

I have a jade Buddhist necklace I bought in China about 10 years ago. It dissappears for months at a time only to reappear somewhere obvious like my desk, my dresser, in a drawer I use every day. I just say it goes on a trip and will come back eventually.

17.) From Danne660:

The entire world have slowed down for me a couple of times in my life. My best guess is some kind of adrenaline spike causing my brain to go into overdrive.

18.) From KitKeating:

1985. My ex wife and I were sleeping. There was a small sliver of light coming in through the window from a streetlight, so the room and bed were dimly visible. Our black Pomeranian was at the end of the bed asleep.

I dreamt that I woke up, reached down to pet him, and he turned into a glossy black bivalve/oyster thing which opened up to reveal rows of gleaming glass teeth. I woke up to my ex backpedalling up the bed over the pillows towards the wall.

I asked "what's wrong??" She said, "what is that shiny black clam thing with the teeth at the end of the bed?? Where's the dog?"

We had had the same nightmare at the same time. This still gives me a chill.

19.) From popcornexit:

I've got several kids and night terrors are always a bit freaky, but once you know it's normal and what it's like, you kind of get used to it. But my middle child had something happen a couple years ago that didn't seem like it could be a night terror. He's almost five now and has been pretty advanced in academics for a while (somehow learned how to read the names of numbers and colors and such and I accidentally found out one day when I caught him reading what I had written).

He came into my room very upset one night. Night terror. Except he was fully awake. I know they can seem like they're awake but they're not. But I had him doing math. 3+2 is? ... 5. Asking very high level questions about things. He seemed fully alert and aware. But he was seeing something my wife and I could not see. Something threatening and scary. "The fly" was going to get him. He shrieked ear piercing screeches, consistently turning away and back to the doorway into my master bath where he saw this thing that was invisible to me. This happened for a few nights, too. I could only reassure him that he was okay and nothing was there and we would protect him. "You're okay. You're okay, " I'd tell him.

He always darted down the hallway between his room and mine for a few days after this, reassuring himself by saying "I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm okay" as he ran. Poor thing. Freaked my wife and me out completely.

20.) From Chaithecat:

I was driving about 50 mph, and a car ran a stop sign on an on ramp and pulled out right in front of me. I remember bracing for impact and then I was about 300 yards down the highway and I saw the car at the ramp in my rearview, just about to pull out.

21.) ​​​​​​​From delboy83:

Around 12 years ago I had a dark purple 3 series BMW which I drove to work and parked in the same spot for around 3 years. I sold the car due to mileage and wanting something a little more reliable and purchased a different car.

1 week later, I turn up to work to find my purple BMW parked in my parking spot. I was totally WTF?

Turns out that we had a work-experience kid start that day, and his dad had dropped him off in my old car that he bought 2 days earlier.

What are the chances of that? I've never met this kid or his dad, and yet here was my old car in my/its space.

22.) From Stockero1:

I was walking my dog and I was almost to the driveway when I looked down for some reason and I looked back up and I ended up being back at the road about 6 blocks away from where I thought I was. I was so confused but my dog looked completely fine.

FYI- I don’t drink or do drugs, I’m still pretty young

23.) ​​​​​​​From WhereIsAmandaCrew:

I once clocked out of work at 6pm (like I always did at the time) and began my hour long train ride home.

After I had found a seat, I went to sleep and woke up just before my station. From the station, it is a short bus journey (10-15 minutes) to reach home.

During the entire journey, I didn't use my phone and I don't wear a watch so I didn't really notice the time anywhere.

When I reached home, my family surprised me with "You're home early, everything alright?". I look at the wall-clock and it is about to be 6pm. I was too shocked to understand what happened. Checked other watches, cellphones etc and the time is absolutely right.

A few days later, the admin emailed us the timesheets for the month (times clocking in and out), and every single days for me was around the same 6pm. So it certainly wasn't me having left work earlier.

To this date, I haven't figured out how I gained between 60-90 minutes that day.

24.) From benjtom:

I had just pulled into the parking lot of where I worked and was walking towards the building. It was like 3 in the afternoon, broad daylight.

All of a sudden, I heard an ambulance’s siren start sounding. Naturally, I looked down the road to try and see the ambulance. I see it approaching and decided to watch it for a bit. It was quickly getting closer, and it was about to pass right by me. However, there was a large SUV waiting to turn out of the parking lot and onto the road, blocking a few meters of the road from my view. The ambulance passed behind the SUV, probably about 50 feet away from me at most, and I vividly remember the siren becoming completely silent in that instant. The ambulance had vanished entirely as it passed behind that SUV.

I was so confused. The road did not have many cars on it at the time, and it was broad daylight. I did a triple-take and made sure that I didn’t just miss it. I had a clear view of the road going both directions, and there was no more ambulance to be seen. No more siren either. I walked up and down the road, trying to find it for a solid minute. But nope, it was gone. I was well rested, not on drugs, and I didn’t have a history of hallucinations. It seems dismissible, but I was completely aware of what happened, and I can’t explain it to this day.

25.) ​​​​​​​From QueenOfTheYautja:

A total of 3 times in my life I have had memories of seeing movies/movie trailers that hadn't been made yet. It's not even a feeling of Deja vu, it's a clear vivid memory of seeing the movie before.

Edit: the movies were the blind side, devil and Prometheus.

26.) ​​​​​​​From bustypirate:

I've told this story before and could go into a ton of detail but here's the short version.

I am 100% sure I vividly remember a dog that apparently doesn't exist. When I was 16 we lived on the other side of the province and my uncle had this little jack russell named Crue. Crue went missing for several months and then turned up at a humane society over an hour away and we were all shocked this little dog has made it so far.

anyway that was almost 20 years ago and the other day I was talking to my parents and was like you know "whenever I hear about Jack Russells I think about Crue and that stunt he pulled" and they had no idea what I was talking about. Insisted my uncle had never had such a dog, I must have dreamed it, etc. Honestly anyone else who would have remembered this dog has been dead for a long time and I don't even have any pictures of my uncle. I have absolutely no way to prove this dog existed but I'm sure that he did.

27.) ​​​​​​​From ynmkr:

My wife passed away a year ago today. Had a some odd things happen like a couple of old meaningful pictures show up that I swore were in storage. The strangest one was I vacuumed the carpet and as soon as I was done a diamond ring was on the ground right where I had just cleaned. It was like she was saying "Hey this one is real don't lose it!".

28.) ​​​​​​​From 842734:

I don’t personally remember this, but I would see my dead grandfather all the time when I was a kid. From the ages of 7-9 there was probably 10 different incidents.

My dad was an absolute pansy when it came to “ghosts” (which I don’t really believe in) and wanted to take me to the doctor. My dad had one of those bathrooms with a separate toilet room and no one that lived in the house closed the bathroom door unless they were bathing. I was playing runescape and my dad asked why the bathroom door was closed, and I said it’s because grandpas in there. That’s the only one I actually remember.

There was maybe two other bathroom incidents and some incidents when I would sit on the floor and watch tv with my dad and he would tell me to go sit in the (what was once my grandfathers) chair and said i couldn’t because grandpa was sleeping.

I don’t know how creepy these are tbh but they freaked out my family for sure.

29.) From steampunker13:

I was working on my motorcycle in a dirt lot where I had crashed it trying to do a sick drift, breaking off the clutch lever and the gear shifter. I had brought a wrench set with me and I was using one of them to take off a bolt when I put it down on the ground to finish unscrewing the bolt with my hand. Two minutes later I went to pick it back up and it was gone. I ran all around this dirt lot looking for it to no avail, luckily I had a spare in the car. Fixed the bike and drove back to my apartment to shower as I was filthy. I walked in my room and sitting on my desk was the wrench. I was dumbfounded.

30.) From mYl1ttl3PWNY:

I remember driving my car to this intersection in this rural area and I'm checking both sides because of terrible blind spots. In the corner of my eye my mother is sitting there and says something like "it's all clear my way"

I look back and she isn't there. My mother had been dead for a few years at this point. This was also in the middle of the day and I've never had it happen since.

31.) ​​​​​​​From zootnotdingo:

When the song “The Final Countdown” was released in the 80s, I already knew it. It was brand new, just released, but I knew the tune and the words and could sing the whole thing beginning to end. I believed for a while that it was a cover version, but it wasn’t.

Woman asks if she's wrong for banning teen step-son from home after he mocked her infertility.

$
0
0

Being a loving step-parent can be incredibly complicated when you're dealing with a child who holds onto unfounded resentment through adulthood. While we've all heard and seen the evil step-mother tropes in Disney movies and beyond, most realities are far more complicated, and there are certainly situations where step-children lash out and hurl their pain at an innocent step-parent for daring to fall in love with their mom or dad.

Finding ways to navigate a one-sided relationship with a step-child can be near impossible, particularly when they've grown into bitter adults who never considered your perspective. This difficulty is compounded by the desire to please your partner, and consider the importance of their relationship with their child.

In a recent post on the Am I The A*shole subreddit, a step-mom asked if she's wrong for banning her grown step-son from her home.

AITA for not being able to forgive my stepson and banning him from our home?

OP kicked off the post by sharing that she's been in her step-son's life since he was 6-years-old, and he's now 19.

She was not dating the step-son's father during the dissolution of the marriage, and there was no foul-play on OP's end at all. She just happened to fall in love with a divorced dad.

I've been in my stepson's life since he was 6 years old. He is now 19 and in college.

From the ages of 9-17, my stepson did everything he could to make our lives miserable.

Throughout the years, OP's step-son has consistently tormented her through name-calling, spreading rumors, and general hostility.

He has tormented my husband and I simply for trying to find happiness.

He has said unbelievably cruel things. He made up several lies about my husband and I that damaged our professional lives and finances permanently.

This pattern of toxic behavior came to a climax when OP's step-son found out about her infertility issues and kicked her while she was down emotionally.

When he was 16, he told me I had a toxic uterus because I was apparently a cold woman. This was when he found out about my infertility issues.

It was a knife through my heart that I can't seem to forget or forgive.

OP has space from her step-son now that he's away in college, and she recently drew a boundary by banning her step-son from living with them over the summer.

He's now in college and ignores me completely. Which honestly is a relief. My husband still talks to him regularly.

For this coming summer, I told my husband my stepson could not live with us. That I will not put myself through anymore of the horrible behavior.

This has caused tension with OP's husband, who thinks they should both give his son a chance to prove that he's grown up and more sensitive.

My husband is angry that I won't give him a chance to make up.

We know he was being influenced by his mother but at some point he was old enough.

Grown up or not, OP has immense anxiety just thinking about her step-son, and feels drawing this boundary is important for her mental health.

Just hearing his name gives me terrible anxiety.

Its not even like I was the other woman or anything. Not that it should excuse his behavior in any way.

AITA?

Inner-Project thinks OP should feel safe in her home, and should only consider making amends with her step-son if he reaches out directly.

NTA

Some wounds heal slowly, if at all.

Unless the step son makes direct contact with you to make amends (and you accept that process), your home should be a safe place for you. Help husband see that as not taking sides, but simple reality.

WritPositWrit thinks it's emotionally dishonest for OP to claim her step-son could "terrorize" her starting at age 6, since he was so young, and believes there's more to the story than being told.

INFO: what does “simply for trying to find happiness” mean?

This is a complex situation and we don’t know what has happened in the relationship over many years. How Has your search for happiness affected him? What does “happiness” mean here? Has he lived with you in the past?

NolinNa thinks OP and her husband are in the wrong, since the step-son's behavior started so young and from a place of hurt.

Err I’m gonna go against the grain and say ESH but you and your husband kind of suck more, but please here me out. Admittedly I’m biased because I came from a broken home where my parents tried to manipulate me to act against the other parent.

You certainly have a right to be treated respectfully, and have the rules you and your partner have agreed upon abided by. And especially at 19 he should have the age and maturity to recognize that if he can’t live by your rules than he can’t live there.

The reason why you and your partner suck more is because you guys left a vulnerable impressionable child in the care of someone abusing him. Parental alienation is extremely abusive and the second you realized that was happening you guys should have filed for full custody with supervised visitation. Her actions were getting in the way of therapy he clearly needed (and still needs)! He was 6 years old! You let a child be manipulated by someone who was supposed to be his protector.

I’m so sorry this is what you’re dealing with, but I can’t say I’m surprised. Best of luck.

GrayWolfGamer- thinks OP is manipulative and hiding her step-son's side of the story.

Info: There is obviously something wrong on your side and somthing you aren't spilling. Things you say don't add up. You're claiming for up to a decade you stepson has been harassing you, messing up your life, etc. But truly rotten people dont borderline get it from nowhere. At 18-19 he should know what's right from wrong, and should've at the very least apologized, or told him dad she regrets what he's done.

From everyones else's eyes, you may seem like the victim in totatality due to the way you structured, but you're leaving huge holes in the story, and it seemingly is only to make sure you seem innocent in light of it all.

NUTmeSHELL thinks OP is completely in her right to ban her step-son from the house, but also thinks the family desperately needs marriage counseling.

NTA. You shouldn’t be made uncomfortable in your own home. Please consider marriage counseling. Having a neutral party that you and your husband can discuss this with may help you develop a plan for dealing with your stepson going forward.

polsenissen thinks OP is withholding information, and that she should do some soul-searching about ways she may have harmed her step-son over the years.

INFO. From this post it looks like you have done nothing wrong for all these years. Unless you are a perfect human being, I highly doubt that this is correct. I think you should think through what you have done that might have hurt him, apologize without excuses and ask if you two can start over. It might be unfair to you, but you should do it for your husband. One last try. Give the boy a real chance as an adult too before you judge him for his actions as a teenager, while manipulated by his Mother.

What do you think? Is OP manipulating the situation and making herself the victim, or is this a completely healthy boundary she's setting?

Children of doomsday preppers share what life was like getting ready for the end of the world.

$
0
0

"Doomsday preppers"—people who are prepared for an apocalyptic emergency—tend to have a reputation as being a lil bit crazy. But given the current state of the world, they might actually be the sanest people around. It can't hurt to be prepared, right?!?

Someone asked Reddit: "people who grew up with 'Doomsday Prepper' parents, what was it like?" Turns out, being a "Doomsday prepper" is more common than you might think—you might even be one yourself!

These 19 people share what it was like growing up when your family is preparing for the end of the world:

1.) From InvisibleMurderChild:

Bottles and bottles and bottles of water in the garage. My mom bought the bulk packages from Costco and stuffed them there; I wouldn't be surprised if there were over a hundred plastic containers in there.

The "the world's gonna end" panic-mentality mostly comes from my mom's side, and it usually happens in waves. Things will be chill for a while, and the all of the sudden packages with no-electricity hand-crank radios and portable generators will show up at our door. She claims that she makes "ambient purchases" while half-asleep, but I think she really just that paranoid.

A few times, she's mentioned buying a cow. For its milk. Incase we're forced to live off the land or whatever, so we can still have milk. And after explaining to her that no, we absolutely do not have the room or faculties to take care of a whole-ass cow, she starts up with the same line of questioning, but asking if we can get a goat instead. We don't even have a front or backyard.

2.) From Chazkuangshi:

Dad wasn't a full on doomsday prepper, but he was a paranoid schizophrenic. He had a stock of MREs that I had now and then. They weren't bad. Also canned ensure back when it came in cans. Also learned a lot about stuff like maintaining salt after sweating, dad used to have me lick a teaspoon of salt after our walks. Tons of flashlights and batteries in the house. I remember him teaching me how to use a gas mask "just in case". We live in upstate NY, so yeah not exactly a war zone. He had a generator just in case the power went out (honestly not a bad idea because he lived in a place where winter could get pretty hairy). I will say Y2K had him totally spooked.

3.) From blackcloudcat:

This makes me think of the mother of a friend of mine. She had a small room off the side of the kitchen, shelves filled floor to ceiling with tins. it wasn't about 'doomsday'. She had starved as a child in Holland during WWII, aged around 5. She didn't do any other prepping, I don't believe she thought it would happen again. She was a smart, capable woman living a continent away from Holland by the time I met her. I suspect the tins were a psychological safety net, a way of soothing childhood trauma.

4.) From nxtstagee:

My dad stocked textiles, toiletries, non-perishables, and water to an extreme amount. Our entire basement was basically a bunker. It could be locked from the inside at both the top and the bottom of the stairs, and we had huge drums of potable water that probably stood to about stomach-high on me now as an adult. We also kept old 2-litr bottles (old pepsi bottles) for non-potable that we stacked like wine on heavy shelves, as well as rice and dried beans in vacuumed sealed containers. He was constantly buying things at old surplus outlets. Gas masks, iodide tablets, rucksacks, etc, and taught us how to make bullets using a shell-cleaner and powder packer. Like that one poster above mentioned, we also typically had about every few weeks a few days where we ate next to nothing, and were taught a lot of both local and non-local plants that could be edible (clover, acorns, dandilion, etc) and how to prepare them, as well as things that could be health-beneficial (clover, cherry bark, mullein, etc) and how to prepare them. We rarely got to go hunting, because of where we lived at the time, but he did teach us how to set various snares and traps, like figure fours and pitfalls, and any time one of our traps succeeded, he would use it as an opportunity to teach us how to clean and prepare meat not just for that day, but how to cut and dry it for future use. I have to say, knowing how to brain-tan a rabbit skin is not something I ever expected to come up in conversation as an adult as much as it actually does!

5.) From TemptCiderFan:

I learned how to hunt when I was six. For my eleventh birthday, I learned how to make a bow and arrow with the contents of my hiking kit and caught a rabbit for lunch. I was then shown how to use said rabbit's bones and internal organs to fish, and we had trout and perch for dinner.

My dad is of the mind that doomsday preppers who just stockpile food are idiots, because even if they survive the apocalypse all they're doing is turning themselves into particular fat swines for the inevitable bandits to look for. Better to be able to hunt and gather food.

My doomsday "kit" is just a bugout bag in my walk-in pantry.

6.) From fabledangie:

Yeeeah that's pretty much what I got as well. My dad stockpiles ammo, reloading equipment, and gun parts. Slight focus on stuff like seeds, water filters, and outdoor comforts like a nice tent, good sleeping bags, etc. He made bug out bags for us all to keep in the trunk with 3 days of water, complete meal bars, basic safety gear, cash to get the last few tanks of gas we can, and a subtle map to the safe house way up north. Makes us refresh everything at xmas when we all come home lmao.

But really, without him I probably wouldn't have such an interest in wildlife or agriculture, which I went to school for, or know how to hunt/shoot, which was a big boon when dating my now long term bf (who also preps, RIP me). My dad's not too (publicly) crazy with it and stays within his means.

7.) From coffeetish:

We were always too poor to fully prepare for the end times although my mom still believes they are coming. Fun fact, if you dont have food storage of your own create a map of all the mormons in your town so when shit goes down you can take theirs! This was actual advise from my mother. She grew up in Utah and it's a well known fact that mormons are supposed to hold onto 7 years of food storage at all times in case of jesus. It was also a plot point in an S.M. Stirling post apocalyptic novel that a group of people stumbled across an abandoned mormon house which set them up nicely for food for a bit. So yeah, make a mormon friend for the end times.

8.) From notableea:

I grew up southern Baptist. We were taught that the rapture was going to happen any day. Every night I was afraid to go to sleep because I might be raptured before I woke up. I wasn't going to get to grow up, get married or have children. As I went through my teenage years, I didn't plan for my future as I should have because we weren't going to be here next year. My mother never bought Christmas wrapping paper on sale because next Christmas wasn't going to come.

If I knew then what I know now, I would have done many things differently.

9.) From TheSoviet-Union:

My father had crates full of non perishable food, camping gear, gas cookers. you name it, he had it.

he stored that in a "bunker" he built, which was really just a big anderson shelter.

10.) From Cosmic-Cranberry:

My dad is a doomsday prepper. My whole life as a kid, he spent his spare time preparing for the inevitable collapse of the United States due to corruption. Red-blooded Religious Republican.

Every Christmas, dad would ask for freeze-dried food, knives, ammo, DIY manuals, and other stuff. He would spend his spare time with us as kids going to secondhand thrift stores to see what cool things we could find and fix up, the whole time talking about current events and politics and conspiracy theories.

My dad taught me everything I know. How to fix computers, how to keep a clamp on my internet privacy, how to handle firearms safely, how to keep a level head in a crisis, how to plan ahead, how to vet my sources for bad information, to never trust anyone in a position of power, how to camp and find food and shelter... the apocalypse still hasn't happened yet, but it brought me a lot of comfort and it really grew a strong bond with my father.

He never wrote me off for being a girl. He taught me the exact same skills he taught my younger brothers. He never treated me like I was a lesser person. When all the other men I knew in our rural town didn't give me a second glance, my dad taught me how to force them to look my way and acknowledge I was just as tough and competent as they were. In some cases, even moreso. It was empowerment that I just wouldn't have had otherwise in rural Utah.

My dad and I were, and still are, very close. We don't share the same viewpoint anymore. I can't talk politics or ecology with him anymore. He still thinks that global warming is fake and that immigrants are all illegals (but mostly good people escaping bad governments) and that the government is going to switch to fascism and martial law any day now. He still hoards old junk on the promise that he'll fix it one day. It took Sandy Hook for him to realize that Alex Jones was a paranoid psychopath who profited off of lies he believed.

It took me a long time to realize, but my dad was a prepper for one reason and one reason only. He loved us, and was terrified of the unthinkable happening to us. And when times were lean and cash was scarce, the freeze-dried food in the store room kept us fed, and the propane heaters kept us warm. He wanted to make sure that no matter what happened, no matter how far-fetched or mundane, we had our bases covered.

But looking back, my father damaged himself by isolating himself in paranoia and constant anxiety. Yes, it taught me helpful skills that I still use every day (despite the shocking lack of an apocalypse or martial law), and yes it helped me bond with my dad. And yes, I still look forward to the new pocket knife we all get on Christmas, that I always keep in my back pocket. But a part of me wishes he had just gotten therapy instead of getting guns and knives and dry food.

11.) From starlet25:

My mom hoards a ton of canned food everywhere in the house, along with random tools she's been told will be helpful and so many paper towels and rolls of toilet paper. The guns are another thing. Everyone in my family is content to let her do her thing and spend thousands of dollars prepping. There are so many useless things that take up a ridiculous amount of space there, all while she complained that we had too much stuff and needed to get rid of our actual belongings to make more room.

Everyone she knows gets printouts of the newsletters she's signed up for with prophecies about the end times. When I was still living at home, she'd walk into the room at random times to give me hour-long lectures about the "coming wars and end times" and how sinners are responsible for it. It was really stressful, especially because I have anxiety (which I'm sure isn't because of growing up in a paranoid atmosphere at all /s), and I still have nightmares about apocalyptic scenarios.

I've forced myself to develop a more accepting view for my own sanity, which is essentially, "There are too many options to prepare for all of them, and I don't know how much I want to survive in a post-apocalyptic world anyway, so I'm going to enjoy the time I have without stressing too much about what-ifs." Cognitive Behavioral Therapy has been really helpful for dealing with the paranoia that still pops up sometimes, and I really recommend it for anybody who grew up in that atmosphere and has anxiety stemming from it.

12.) From A_Cuddly_Burrito:

Well, there was always food in the house

13.) From Beaudet90:

it was pretty much the same as any other normal family I assume, we just went bulk shopping every few months, the only strange-ish thing is that we'd have a week out of every month that we'd have to kind of fast, we could have a pack of raisins and a bottle of water every day and that's all.

14.) From yehlas:

Not quite that extreme, but I was raised JW (jehovahs witness) they didn't have a specific date but it was always 'within the next decade, for sure', so I grew up thinking that all my non-JW friends would be dead within 10 years, which was not a pleasant thought for a 6 year old. In class I used to worry that armageddon would strike and I'd be stuck in a classroom of dead people till my parents found me. Religion. Smh.

15.) From WhiteFox1992:

Not me nor my parents. But my neighbors being a man and a woman believed the world was ending in 2012.
Starting in 2010 they started collecting canned food and their house was just full of canned soup and ravioli.
To repent for Jesus in mid 2012, they gave all their stuff away except their offroad truck, their array of canned food, and some furniture. They also started collected real gold items and some diamonds so if the economy crashed they could use it to trade for stuff.
Come and pass 2012 they are mostly back to normal though they are apparently now into sexual domination because of how they specifically prepared for in 2012... I feel I don't want to know the specifics of that line of dominos.

16.) From alwert:

My parents didn't get into it until later in my life but in three years they have

-Built a Farm. Chickens, Turkeys, Rabbits, a goat at one point, a pig.

-stocked up on ammo, like thousands upon thousands of bullets.

-subscribed to all right wing groups possible, whether it be facebook, or the "Watchmen of America" which regularly do doomsday drills.

-tried to get me in on everything.

-are convinced Obama is the antichrist.

-listen to Glenn Beck everyday

I try to avoid all conversations about anything like that with them. It usually ends in a fight, and I do not want to hate my parents.

17.) From sevven07:

Mostly normal. My dad just showed me what to do just in case doomsday ever came. Taught me how to camp / survive, use camo, ration food, shoot guns, and other basic survival skills. He taught me it’s always better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it

18.) From erinelizabeth1985:

I didn’t realize at the time that my dad was a “prepper”. We lived in the mountains, about 30 minutes from the nearest small town (one grocery store) and over an hour from the nearest town with a Walmart. Our water was gravity fed to our house from a water fall. We had a huge log home that was heated with a wood stove that was huge and half of it was an oven for baking. We had radiant floor heating (in the late 90s, none of my friends even knew what that was), our house had a lot of hidden areas. We actually had a meat locker. My dad was a big hunter and he would bring home the meat, we would pop a fake wall off the house, bring the meat down into the meat room to hang. We were set up to be fully self sufficient in the lack of electricity. We built our house off of logs that we cut down on our property. We had a cellar filled with canned goods and always had some kind of meat in the freezer.

19.) From txjr5:

My mom was/is convinced that in the apocalypse toilet paper would be as good as currency...she has an entire room in her house that is filled from wall to wall, floor to ceiling with toilet paper....it’s like a fucking Costco aisle....we were/are forbidden to talk about it (because she doesn’t want to be killed over it...keeps it in the down low) growing up it didn’t seem weird because it was “normal” but now that I’m an adult and a mother myself....it seems so crazy to me.


Man discovers dead mother's Kindle is filled exclusively with comically-titled smut.

$
0
0

The only thing awkward than your mother finding your porn collection is finding your mother's porn collection.

Redditor commander_reload shared the story in the "Today I F*cked Up" forum of the time he was going through his late mother's things after she passed away. When he turned on his mom's Kindle, he discovered what turned her on:

Setting the scene, I (36M at the time) and my older sibling (41F) were working through our recently-deceased mother's (74F) possessions in order to clear her house. We stumbled upon her Kindle during our room cleanups, and my sister came out with the fatal line:

"Awww, she used to love reading. I know she's bought tonnes of books from Amazon over the years. I wonder what she's read recently?"

When he opened the Kindle, he discovered that his mom has downloaded a whopping (whipping?) 992 titles, including:

Man of the House (A Christian Domestic Discipline Book)

Sugar Daddy

Diapered For Pay

A Day in Diapers

Diaper Slave Series: Clara

Feeding the Farmer's Partner

Doctor It Hurts So Bad

Arousing Brandi

Bad Girl Good

Hot Cooking Spanker Wanted

He uploaded two photos (of the Kindle, not of the action!) for proof.

His favorite?

"Diapered for Pay" and "Breeding my Sleeping Wife" are particular gems, however "Hot Cooking Spanker" takes on a new dimension when you consider her former occupation as a chef.

Suffice to say, the expression on my face made my sister grab it out of my hands. Turning bright red, she muttered "I knew I shouldn't have introduced her to 50 Shades".

Fifty Shades of Grey is the ultimate gateway drug.

21 Memes Men Probably Won't Find Funny.

$
0
0

"I feel there is something unexplored about woman that only a woman can explore."

-Georgia O'Keeffe

There are some things only a woman will understand. Like how annoying it is when your makeup runs, how exciting it is when a dress has pockets, and how funny these memes are.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

15 people share the advice their parents gave them that turned out to be bad.

$
0
0

Parents might mean well (usually...) but sometimes, their advice turns out to be pretty horrific.

A recent Reddit thread asked people to share the advice from their parents that turned out to be wildly off-base. Here are 15 of the biggest gems.

1. Computers will be obsolete any day now.

Computers will never catch on, don't waste any more of your time on them.

Wasted a decade doing random temping jobs before finally working with computers. Now they harass me all the time to fix their devices. - Biscotti499

2. If only this were true.

If you study for the final year of high school, you’ll never have to study for the rest of your life (I think this is very India-specific advice though). Boy were they wrong. - elSidCampeador

3. Ah, this old chestnut.

You can tell me, It's okay/I won't get angry - cannedthoughts

4. This is a great way to get security called on you.

“You can’t just apply online! Get dressed up, go to Lockheed Martin, introduce yourself, and ask if they have any available positions!” ... I didn’t do it for the record, they were just so adamant about it... - Hillman9611

5. This is very true.

"Flattery will get you no where."

Kissing ass is actually very helpful in getting ahead. - -eDgAr-

6. Even if bullies were secretly in love with you, it wouldn't help.

"They're only mean to you because they like you/they're jealous."

That's a great way to encourage people into shitty, abusive relationships.

Also, they are mean because I'm a f***ing loser with no social skills. - Sad_Number

7. Yeah, we'll figure out how to pay for school, you just won't ever be able to afford a house.

“Get into the best college you can, we’ll figure out how to pay for it.” Guess who has a ton of student loan debt now. - thestarswaltz

8. Well, it's the thought that counts.

Work doing what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.

I do love what I do but it still f***ing hard work. - purpleinme

9. Yikes, this is manipulative.

"People only pretend to be your friends to take advantage of you, family is what matters." - Jiazzz

10. Raise your hand if you have no idea how to tell if you're full because your parents force-fed you as a child!

Clean plate club and you'll grow up to be strong and healthy. She forgot to mention fat. Thanks mom. - digifuzz

11. Hobbies can be jobs!

“Music can only be your hobby, you should get a real job”

Started making money only with music since 17yo, never worked a day anywhere else and made a great career out of it. - killerbass

12. Uhh... wow, so sorry you went through that.

My mom once told me that men never had to apologize and that saying sorry was the woman's job.

I knew instantly how bullshit it was and it made me wonder what kind of Stockholm Syndrome my father gave my mom - curlyquinn02

13. Yes, women should stick to the bongos or nothing!

Don't play a brass instrument because "it's for boys."

Don't display your intelligence because "boys find that intimidating." - TBoguS118

14. Truly chaotic mothering.

Mum told me the pill wasn't effective if I drank alcohol.

This was her way to stop me drinking under age, it worked, I choose underage sex instead. Only found out this was a lie in my 20s. I was shocked. I confronted her about it, she laughed and was proud it worked for so long.

*I was put on the pill at a young age by my gynecologist due to a medical condition - yougotthisone

15. School is not always the answer.

"Go to school, its an investment in your future!"

My student loans cost more than 2x more each month than what I make after expenses. I literally become more and more in debt with each passing month, while working full time.

I'm a lawyer. - EvilLost

Woman wants fiancé to pay for her hair and wardrobe to attend his work events.

$
0
0

Keeping up appearances for work purposes can be pricey — and one woman is hoping her fiancé will pick up the tab.

The woman in question is engaged to a guy whose profession requires him to attend fancy events with his significant other by his side. The costs are racking up, so she asked her dude to pay for her clothing, hair and accessories. He thought the costs were excessive, so she asked Reddit who's in the wrong.

The back story: the woman has to attend one to three of these soirées a month.

My fiance's work throws a lot of compulsory social events that involve a dress code. Usually 1 a month, often 2 or 3. I'm not one for dressing up but when he has these things I always go with him and dress according to the dress code. I have 3 passes a year to not go.

And if she repeats an outfit, other people will actually call her out...

At the last fundraiser one of his coworker's wives asked me if the dress I was wearing was the same dress I wore a couple months ago to another event and I say yes. The coworker hears this and asks F if he can't afford to buy me a new dress. F thought the coworker was a dick but later told me he was embarrassed by the "joke" and asked me to get a new dress for next time.

But she's feeling the financial pinch.

Here's the thing. F makes more than double what I make. The only reason I can afford as many dresses and shoes and accessories as I currently can is that he pays 2x what I do in everything else. He suggested this initially because he wanted a bigger place that I couldn't afford to pay half on, and we've been living like this for a year now.

However, every event, which is minimum once a month, requires a new dress, new jewelry, a new bag and new shoes.

The costs keep mounting, especially because his boss's wife has taken a shine to her:

Recently I've also started to get my hair done professionally before the event, because his bosses boss's wife and I get on well, and she asked me a few months ago to start getting ready with her, which means going to the same salon she does and getting my hair and nails done for the event while she gets hers done. I wanted to stop doing this after the first time, but F asked me to continue because he thinks if I talk him up to the wife she'll talk him up to the boss. There's been occasions where getting ready with her has also involved going with her to choose her dress, and she's picked me out a dress/bag/shoes for the event and I've had to get them.

She's racking up bills in excess of $1,500 a month.

Just for the last event, the cost of hair, nails, dress, shoes, bag and jewelry came to over £600. There is an average of 2 events per month, so £1200 per month average to go to these events. I make about £1800 a month. Living expenses, even with him paying significantly more than I do, come to about £500.

So she confronted her fiancé...

I collected up my receipts, handed them to him and said "look, I'm fine with coming to your things, but I need you to help me out with them. You know how much I make, and all of my disposable income is going into this. If you want me in all new stuff every month, then I need you to pitch in. If the budget doesn't stretch that far then I'm just going to have to wear my old dresses."

And he accused her of over-spending.

He then started going through the receipts, asking if I really needed this or that. He then said that he already pays out a shedload each month and he's going to need me to keep spending as normal. I said that he needs to at least partially fund the next outfit or I'm using my pass.

So is she the a-hole here, or is he?

After hearing the full story, most of Reddit agrees that it's not crazy for her to expect her fiancé to pay.

Since it's part of his job, it's his responsibility, says Psypokatate:

It's not that he needs "at least partially" to pay. He needs to pay completely for these work-related events. It takes your time, it takes your money and the only goal is so that he's nicely seen by his boss.

NTA, it's ridiculous he doesn't see what's wrong in it.

AnotaCocktail agreed, and added that the might want to figure this out before getting married:

This is such an odd situation. I’m going with NTA.

But I would highly suggest you and F get on the same page about how money is handled after marriage. Seems you two have incongruent thoughts.

And it’s also weird that he expects you to do all this ‘getting ready with the boss’ wife’ for his benefit, and he doesn’t even want to pay for it?

Please figure this out before you get married.

WorkingMomAndWife suggested renting clothes:

Maybe look in to something like Rent The Runway for your dresses? As for the jewelry, I don’t think anyone will really notice if you rotate the same few pieces of jewelry, but I’ve been to very few black tie events in my life, so I could be completely wrong. But yeah, if he seriously expects you to get a new dress for every event as well as professional hair and makeup, he should at least help out a little.

EBlackR took issue with the fiancé's penny-pinching too:

If he’s pushing back on whether or not you need certain things, reiterate with him frankly that you’ve been getting catty feedback and that it’s reflecting poorly on him. It sounds like he’s shooting the messenger a bit here, frankly you’re being an absolute champ for dealing with all of this nonsense.

In the end, the woman posted an update saying her fiancé has agreed to pay for everthing going forward:

We have a new agreement. He will pay for everything going forward for his work events, and the salon appointments as they are for him. If he is ever required to get clothing for my work or social events I will similarly cover the cost, but that has happened once in the 4 years we've been together. I am going to keep going to these work events because we are in a relationship, one we are going to be in for the rest of our lives. I will continue to go to these events and talk him up 1-3 nights per month for as long as he works there because he needs me to do that, and he will come to my work and social events because I need him to do that.

And she also added that there's nothing wrong with her relationship.

Edit for emphasis: please stop telling me to reconsider my engagement. I appreciate that internet strangers are worried about my relationship but I'm a big girl, I know what I'm doing. Can everyone please chill on telling me to end a loving, healthy, functional relationship that I intend to be in for the rest of my life over my fiance not realizing how expensive women's clothing is? Kindly chill, lads.

That's that on that!

26 Memes To Help You Start Your Day Off With A Giggle.

$
0
0

“Life is worth living as long as there's a laugh in it.”
― Lucy Maud Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

Having a sense of humor about your life makes it infinitely better. These memes will help you start your day off on the right foot.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

22.

23.

24.

25.

26.

19 people share the ways they get terrible landlords to respond to their requests.

$
0
0

If you've ever been in an argument with a landlord, you probably know that it can often be a tiring, soul-crushing, losing battle.

Especially in major cities, landlords are usually like ghosts in that you only see them when they're trying to scare you. Unanswered emails, legal threats, and recklessly maintained buildings pile up because landlords know that at the end of the day, you still need somewhere to live. Moving is hard, and I guess we can deal with four busted kitchen appliances that were built in 1923...

When comedian Caleb Hearon shared his process of communicating with his landlord on Twitter, people found it deeply relatable. Have you ever casually filed a repair request saying, "hey, I think there is black sludge leaking into my bedroom and also there's a mouse family in the dishwasher?" Don't worry, you're not alone! City living is a very special sort of hell and since your landlord definitely isn't going to help you, at least Twitter is there...

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

20 people share the advice their parents gave them that turned out to be complete bull****.

$
0
0

Our parents know what's best...except for when they don't.

People on Reddit are sharing the words of "wisdom" they heard from their parents that turned out to be complete and utter bull****. Boomers don't know everything about computers and the modern job market after all.

1. saria19 with the truth:

"They're teasing you because they like you."

Very wrong, they bullied me because I was small and didn't fight back. It stopped when I finally snapped and threw one of them down a flight of stairs.

2. Biscotti499 is always on call.

Computers will never catch on, don't waste any more of your time on them.

Wasted a decade doing random temping jobs before finally working with computers. Now they harass me all the time to fix their devices.

3. Lol at -eDgAR- and KoogLarousse's response.

"Flattery will get you nowhere."

Kissing a** is actually very helpful in getting ahead.

and licking ass sometimes helps with getting head

4. Check the bars, Wrong_Answer_Willie.

"there ain't nothing open after midnight but bars and girl's legs."

I never could find any of those girls.

5. Inspirational, purpleinme.

Work doing what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.

I do love what I do but it still f*cking hard work.

6. He's the one, UnknownAri817.

my mom always criticized little things I would do and say "you're never going to get a boyfriend if you do it that way."

turns out that those little things were the reason my boyfriend asked me out. Good thing I'm stubborn and didn't listen to her.

7. Uh oh, digifuzz:

Clean plate club and you'll grow up to be strong and healthy. She forgot to mention fat. Thanks mom.

8. From: Varvatos_Vex

You can feed a family on minimum wage.

Haha only if you’re getting financial aid and food donations from a church.

My family had built our lifestyle around being super poor. Glad I broke that cycle.

9. That's kinda genius, notmypantaloonss.

My dad told me that you had to drink water and couldn’t drink anything else like soda or KoolAid or whatever because your body wouldn’t recognize it and you’d die of dehydration.

10. Debt is for everyone, EvilLost.

"Go to school, it's an investment in your future!"

My student loans cost more than 2x MORE each month than what I make after expenses. I literally become more and more in debt with each passing month, while working full time.

I'm a lawyer.

11. She totally got yougotthisone.

Mum told me the pill wasn't effective if I drank alcohol.

This was her way to stop me drinking under age, it worked, I choose underage sex instead. Only found out this was a lie in my 20s. I was shocked. I confronted her about it, she laughed and was proud it worked for so long.

*I was put on the pill at a young age by my gynecologist due to a medical condition

12. Go with your gut, Ghostspider1989.

Anything about dating a girls. Although I always knew it was bullsh*t.

My dad hates women (along with people of color but that's another story) and my mom thinks all women are stupid, weak, and materialistic.

I was getting my girlfriend a white board because she liked to doodle and it would be a cute gift.

My parents FLIPPED sh*t. Telling me that was the dumbest gift ever and that should would break up with me.

So I got her a candle instead. (She would later tell me a white board was a fine gift and I later got her one that we both enjoyed)

We dated for 5 years and my mom kept hammering into me that my gf was gonna cheat on me all because I haven't bought her jewelry yet.

From then on, I kept my dating life private from my pathetic family.

13. Rock on, killerbass.

“Music can only be your hobby, you should get a real job”

Started making money only with music since 17yo, never worked a day anywhere else and made a great career out of it.

14. LOL, kilawl.

Save your beanie babies, they'll be worth a lot one day.

15. Ydain learned the hard way.

Just ignore them and they will leave you alone. Stupidest sh*t ever.

16. Supfan learned the hard way.

Practice your cursive as often as possible. You will need it as an adult.

17. Nice, uglydadd.

Cannabis will ruin your life. I now have a good job with an ancillary cannabis company.

18. From hushablush:

my mother always said “eat one meal a day if you want to be skinny”. thanks, mom. now i have an eating disorder

19. Bon appetit, eF240uKX52hp.

My dad told me that I shouldn't eat late at night because it would cause me to have a stroke in my sleep and die.

My doctor friends just laughed.

20. Good for luke-warm-soup.

vaccines caused my sister's autism (and potentially my brother's homosexuality).

got my first flu and MMR vax last year at 19. this year is all about catching up on the rest. and I'll be sneaking my sister (an adult) to get hers soon.


Mom asks if she's wrong for confessing she regrets having children after sister says she wants to have one.

$
0
0

One of the most repressive parts of a culture centered around toxic positivity (hiding real feelings behind buzzy sayings that make others feel comfortable), is how it causes people to feel shameful about honestly expressing complex experiences.

The pressure to focus on the positive and spin straw into gold is particularly prevalent when it comes to the world of parenting, where women are often villainized if they don't couch feelings of exhaustion in assurances that they love being a mom.

But what about the women who love their kids, but don't love being a mom?! Are they supposed to grin and lie for the sake of other people's comfort?

In a recent post on the Am I The A*shole subreddit, a mom of three asked if she was wrong for getting honest with her sister about regretting having kids.

AITA for saying I regret having children?

OP shared that she has a 4-year-old, 2-year-old, and 8-month old, and the kids' father left when she was pregnant for the youngest.

I have three children, 4, 2, 8 months.

Their father left when I was pregnant with the youngest.

Because she's raising the kids solo and the father is unemployed, OP has to work long hours and doesn't get any financial support.

OP clarified that she loves her children deeply, but working long hours and mustering the emotional energy to raise them has left her feeling like a drained husk.

I work long shifts and have to do everything by myself.

Their father is unemployed so we don't get any support from him meaning I have to work longer hours.

I love my children but lately I've just found myself so emotionally drained and tired.

During a recent conversation, OP's sister shared she's considering having kids, and asked for OP's opinion.

Rather than censoring her reality, OP got real and shared that if she could do it all over again she wouldn't have kids. While she loves her children dearly, raising them solo has taken over her life, and she mostly had them out of a sense of societal pressure.

My sister is thinking of having children and asked me my opinion and I said "having children is great, if you have the patience, I was pressured into having my three and I regret it every day, don't get me wrong I absolutely love my children but you have to be a certain type of person."

I was never motherly, I only had children because it was seen as the "right" thing to do.

OP said her sister seemed shocked and terrified by her unbridled views on being a mother, and now she wonders if she shouldn't have been so honest.

I love my children, they're well cared for.

My sister looked at me like I kicked a puppy, apparently I'm an asshole for even thinking what I did.

AITA?

999306 thinks OP's honesty was completely reasonable, and more people should be allowed to get real about the complexities of parenthood.

NTA.

People love to pretend like children are the One True Blessing, and for some people they are. but they are also expensive, time consuming, emotionally and physically draining, and sometimes isolating.

And it's okay to love your children while still wishing you had made different choices. It's an uncomfortable reality of parenthood and, likewise, just being a human being.

timeforknowledge finds it naive that OP's sister acted so surprised.

NTA, she's being naive for not recognizing how difficult it is to be a single mum to multiple kids with no financial support...

Swedish-Butt-Whistle doesn't think OP was even trying to talk her sister out of having kids, she was just sharing her truth.

NTA people need to stop pretending that having kids is always happy shiny Brady bunch stuff. Admitting that you were pressured and you have regrets is a great deterrent to people who might be waffling over whether to make the same decisions you did. And saying you have regrets is not tantamount to abuse.

pepperbeast pointed out that OP is far from alone, we just hear this perspective less often.

NTA, you're not the first person to have children because it seemed like the thing to do and wind up loving your children but hating the whole lifestyle.

GarlicBread_Genocide thinks it's important and healthy for people to be honest about the struggles of parenting.

NTA at all. It's taboo to admit it, but the age of anonymity on the internet has revealed just how many hundreds of people rush into parenthood because it's what is expected and then deeply regret it. You are not alone, wrong or an a*shole. Everyone telling you that those thoughts are best kept to yourself is part of the problem.

Everyone wants to hide what an absolute horror parenthood can be, so all that's left is the gooey Hallmark romantic portrayal of what it's like to have kids and that...is not the reality. Just like it's not true that "it's different when it's your own" or "you can't help but love your own kid" or "it's just instinct!" Keeping the dirty details of pregnancy, child birth and parenthood hush hush is exactly why we have so many people who are miserable because they regret having kids.

cyfermax thinks neither OP or her sister are in the wrong, these honest conversations just happen to be rare and shocking to most.

NAH. People don't like to admit that they regret having kids, I think it's FAR more common that people make out, but that degree of honesty is obviously kinda shocking to most people.

It seems pretty clear that no one believes OP or her sister are wrong in this situation, so long as the kids feel loved and OP doesn't talk about her regrets in front of them, being honest about the reality is healthier than faking it.

14 people who suddenly came into money share stories of people coming after their cash.

$
0
0

Money can definitely change people.

While people who suddenly win the lottery or find themselves collecting a massive inheritance out of nowhere can be changed, it's sometimes the people around you that change the most. Out of nowhere, people come popping out the woodwork with special requests or offers to take you out to fancy places (and have you pay for it!) Having money doesn't mean every day is "Crazy Rich Asians," as nice as that would be...

When a recent Reddit user asked people who suddenly came into a lot of money for their horror stories of friends and family begging for their new cash, people were ready to share. Remember, the grass (and the money) is always greener on the other side!

1. Wow, "marinekid09264."

So I wouldn’t consider it “a lot” of money but I won $5000 on a scratch off that was given to me on my birthday by my aunt. It was just a $2 scratcher and obviously nobody thought I would win that much. I scratched it in front of everyone and they were all super excited for me except my aunt who demanded the ticket back because she paid for it. I even offered to split half with her.

Long story short, she took me to small claims where the judge pretty much laughed and she didn’t get shit. Haven’t talked to her since

2. Damn, "TLKim."

I once took second in a poker tournament and won $150k. There was an audience of about 200 people when it finished. Common practice was ppl ask winners for a "lucky chip". I was almost mobbed by people begging for lucky chips as I left the casino. Had to be escorted by security and paid a friend $300 to follow me in their car and we drove all over town for two hours to make sure nobody was following me home.

3. Well done, "PopcornSurgeon."

I unexpectedly inherited about four years worth of take-home pay. Before I knew how much it would be, I told my best friend I’d be getting a few thousand dollars. She immediately asked me to take her on a trip to Europe. That was the biggest thing she asked for but she made other small requests as well.

When the money came through and it was a lot more than I’d anticipated, I did not tell my friend. Instead, I started distancing myself from her. I also did not tell any of my other friends.

I did tell my boyfriend. He did not ask for anything. I took him on a trip to Europe.

4. This is crazy, "ThadisJones."

So a few years out of college my girlfriend and I were living in a sort of large communal apartment with 5 other people (2 bedrooms, 2 couches in the common area). I had just gotten a significant promotion at my job and that situation was exceptionally below my means, but my GF was convinced that these were her people and they were all going to become great philosophy writers and poets by living together and sharing experiences. They were all unemployed or underemployed, and experienced moochers, so I was very careful not to let them know I was saving large sums of money with the intent of moving out soon and taking my GF with me (or not...)

One day the other couple had an argument about rent and to try and keep them from coming to blows my GF promised them that I'd cover it for them and showed them one of my paystubs which I guess they showed everyone else. I got home from work and walked right into an "apartment meeting" ambush, where everyone else informed me that they wanted me to contribute "more meaningfully" and they'd put it to a vote before I got back. I told them that I was already paying for their food that they kept guilting my GF into buying for them, topping up the apartment emergency fund instead of stealing from it like the rest of them, and many other things and that I wasn't going to cover other people's rent as well.

The next day when I was at work, someone went into my room and destroyed my laptop, which was the only thing of value I owned at the time. I collected the few things I wanted to take, told my GF I was breaking up with her, and walked out.

5. Yikes, "ftnmech."

Got a 7k settlement from a car accident. I accidentally left the check on the corner table in the living room. My dad walks into my bedroom and asks if I can lend my mom any money. I work minimum wage retail and ask him how much does she need. He says how about half of that 7k check.

It has been almost 8 years. I haven't seen any of that money back.

6. Vultures indeed, "gustavotherecliner."

I inherited my beloved Grandma's house alongside with some other properties. As the house and the properties are near a very rapidly developing city, prices have skyrocketed and lead to me inheriting about $1.5m in value. That may sound awesome at first, but it truly isn't. The house is a very old brick house, built in the late 1700s, and the properties are so small and widely distributed i can't really sell them for a good price. As the house is a listed historical building, every little repair has to be done by state approved professionals for restoration and conservation of old buildings, which basically doubles if not even triples the costs. I rented it out, but the rent i get is barely enough to cover the costs of repairs, insurance etc... I am lucky if i get even by the end of the year. But as this house is where my family used to live for the last 4 generations before my dad bought the ranch and moved there with my mum, i want to keep it in the family as long as possible.

Now, somehow, word has spread that i inherited a lot of money. I did my best to stop these rumors, but it didn't work out. I've never had many friends, but the ones i have are true quality friends. They will do everything for me and i will do everything for them. After i got the house and the rumors spread, i got invitations to dinner in some really fancy restaurants, i was invited to sport events (i don't even like sports) and some other very costly activities. All these came from people who claimed to be my "friends". Needless to say, they expected me to pay for everything. "You've got so much money, what do these $500 matter to you." - "I'll pay you back sometimes." etc... were the common phrases i got to hear. The best one were: "You are way to young (28 btw.) to have this kind of money, so just give it to us!"; "You don't deserve to have so much money! You have never worked a day in your life!" (Been working at the power plant since i was an apprentice at 16, worked my way up to deputy manager/shift supervisor, while the guy this came from was unemployed as long as i can remember and lived from welfare).

I have now learned who to trust and to spot telltale signs of "vultures".

7. No thanks, "prysmyr."

Old friends would only want to meet on the condition that we go out to eat and that I pay for it.

8. Bummer, "Aggressive-Regret."

I received fourteen properties when my last parent died, and the amount of people who crawled out of the woodwork to ask for a ”loan” were unreal. It's really unfortunate that many of them were in a state that publicly publishes details of an estate when probate is granted.

Cut contact with every single one of them. I never asked them for money, why would they think it acceptable to ask me?

9. "No, bro," "greeperfi."

In college I won 10k on Wheel of Fortune and my older brother, who I literally hadn't spoken to in 5 years and who bullied me my whole life to that point, called and asked if I would buy him a motorcycle.

10. Ugh, "somedude456."

My uncle would have been classified as working poor. A job, a wife, a kid, an apartment, but living paycheck to paycheck. They won the little lotto, and with another winner, my uncle got like 200K. They walked away from the apartment, bought the largest house in the poorest neighborhood and their friends always seemed to need something. I remember as a kid, they often had friends living in the guest room. They bought 2 new cheap cars, and then come property tax time, they were broke, and once again working poor.

11. Evil stepdad, "TimeyWimeys."

My mother died, and I ended up being the fifty-fifty beneficiary with the other half being my step-father. My step-father mentioned that my mother had a lot of debts, and asked if I'd be willing to help with some of them. Being more than a little naive and thinking it would be, at most, 5k, I said sure, how much do you need?

The first quote he gave me was 25k, and it wasn't that substantial of an inheritance I received. I was pretty flabbergasted, and basically backed off a bit to say I needed to think about it. However, every time I inquired again, wondering if he'd rethink his actions, the number he asked for kept climbing. Then the requests turned into demands.

Now I don't talk to my step-father at all. The final number he demanded was more than what I received in the first place. And I was not a rich, well-established person with a career at the time. I was 21, and still very much struggling to find my way after having been essentially driven out of home. He hadn't been my abuser, and I had kind of held out hope at the time that, even though he stood back for most of the abuse, he himself wasn't that bad of a person. Took me several years to realize just how fucked up it is to demand the inheritance money of the poor, struggling, abused child of your dead spouse.

12. Winning the lotto isn't always a win, "NervousPlant."

Classic not be but I know someone who has an uncle who once won $7.370.000 or something like that in the national lottery and his wife turned f*cking evil after that. They had never had any problems in their marriage before but she flipped on a dime the second those money came into their lives. She was extremely greedy and wanted to control everything, spend thousands of dollars on designer bags, clothes etc. without asking him first, never cared about his or the kids' well-being and only cared about the money. His life was pure hell right after he won, but luckily it made him realise what a shitty person his wife really was so that he could get rid of her and move on with his life. As far as I heard it all turned out well after they divorced.

13. This is scary, "Sinorra."

So when I started dating my boyfriend I didn't know just how rich he was (we were both 25). By this point he had already made his insane fortune and was quietly investing it whilst working as a primary school teacher because he enjoys teaching and is very talented with kids.

After about 8 months of dating he finally opens up to me about his finances, he is an extremely modest person and uses his money almost exclusively for charity and investing in environmental technology.

We had been planning on going to Malaysia and I was a bit stressed at how to budget my money for the trip. Anyways, long story short he said it took time for him to tell me because he wanted to make sure I loved him for who he is which was and still is true. Showed me his investments and private account statements and I'm not going to lie I got aroused looking at them. By the age of 24 he had basically broken the £100m liquid worth mark and it was still growing. After this we go on the best holiday of my life, I've grown up lower middle class my whole life so suddenly flying in first class and living a 5* life in Malaysia for about a month without a care in the world was something else.

Anyways, as people do we put pictures up on instagram/Facebook. Suddenly I get bombarded by people saying since when did I get rich and if I had spare money laying around. My own aunt knocked on my door at 4am and slapped me in the face for lying about my money and tried to get her son to barge into my flat. Thankfully my boyfriend was there, he absolutely ruined them both. After this she went around telling all of my relatives I had been hiding my wealth and refused to pay for my little sisters treatment before she died (she passed before I met my boyfriend and the treatment likely wouldn't have worked). This hurt me alot and for some reason my family took her side, I cut them off and about 2 weeks later someone set fire to my flat. My neighbours kids ended up in hospital, thanks to security cameras and an eyewitness my own father and brother got jail time.

I went from thinking about all the possibilities of the great stuff I could do for my family with the money to almost being killed by them and cutting them out within a few weeks. It fucking sucks how money changes people.

14. That's the spirit! UltimaterializerX."

My incredibly abusive family all pretended like nothing ever happened the second it got around I was rich. Saying no to those people could not have been more satisfying.

After some early hiccups (and what 20-something wouldn’t mess up when suddenly coming into hundreds of thousands of dollars) I started investing intelligently. Now I’m in my 30s and the portfolio is just over 16 million. My family will never see one penny. F*ck em.

25 times a product was bizarrely created or packaged to be for just men or women.

$
0
0

The world of consumerism is full of manipulative marketing ploys. We are seduced and prodded into buying things through seemingly "personalized" ad campaigns, many of which rely on gendered tropes to target their potential customers.

The popularity of gendered products is so rampant it's easy to miss just how many bonkers pink and blue labels are slapped onto any and everything, with nauseating titles like "princess" or "dude" prefacing the most basic of household products.

While it can be depressing to live in a world that tries to alienate people based on gender, even when selling something as simple as a game, these cringe-inducing amped up marketing strategies are also peak comedy.

In a viral Twitter thread, the activist and artist Louise shared a list of hilarious and terrifying products that were unnecessarily gendered, and the jokes make themselves.

1. Jenga for girls.

2. Bath bombs for men.

3. Shampoos for men and fruit.

4. Binoculars for girls and Americans.

5. A dog bowl for men (the jokes make themselves).

6. Bread for boys only.

7. Gendered planes.

8. God's word for guys.

9. Eggs for men and women.

10. Girls can guitar too.

11. Scrub mommies and daddies.

12. Demons for dames.

13. Toothbrushes have genders too.

14. Tea for men and women.

15. Tape for girls.

16. Hammering for women.

17. Wipes for dudes.

18. Girl batteries.

19. Aggressively gendered ear plugs.

20. Princess poop pillow.

21. Knitting for men.

22. Boys only Dr. Pepper.

23. Stay away, women.

24. Princess and truck crayons.

25. Gift cards for girls and guys.

25 Workplace Memes To Help You Make It To 5pm.

$
0
0

“Everyone brings joy to this office. Some when they enter and others when they leave.”

-Unknown

If work is bringing the pain, these memes will bring the joy. Get ready to laugh your corporate buns off at this hilarious compilation of workplace comedy.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

22.

23.

24.

25.

20 former drug dealers share the weirdest things people tried to trade for drugs.

$
0
0

The desire for a drink or smoke knows no budget limit, and traditional currency goes out the window once you find yourself cash-strapped and craving a blunt. While there are plenty of heartbreaking NSFW stories about the forms of payment people offer when in the throes of addiction, those feel both exploitive and voyueristic.

However, there is a bizarre middle ground between the traditional cash exchange and a Trainspotting style scene of self-destruction. Anyone who has sold green or prescription drugs for extra cash has likely encountered creative offers in lieu of cash.

In a popular Reddit thread, former drug dealers and smokers shared the weirdest non-sexual payments they exchanged for a bag.

1. MissElision actually had a dealer help them get off drugs.

Ex-user of opiates here.

My dealer would only give me the drugs if I gave him my blades and allowed him to check me for any cuts. I was in a seriously dark time and he helped me in a lot of ways. Eventually, once I started to get better, he refused to sell me any drugs and also made it clear to his friend dealers that I was blacklisted. One of the reasons I turned my life around.

2. SpunkMasterPepe got their cat for some Xanax.

A Cat for 3 Xanax bars. The cat was covered in fleas and super young. I took the deal because I felt bad for the cat, and I wouldn’t trade this cat for a million dollars. We have had 4 amazing years together, he has pulled babes for me, he acts like a dog, sleeps in his back, and follows me around the house. Best deal ever, I love my kitty.

3. a_man_in_black was once offered a possum.

Former dealer/cook. Did time, straightened up now. You get offered all kinds of things. sexual favors, stolen goods, whatever they scavenged. Someone once tried to make a purchase from me by offering a wadded up ball of copper wire the size of a beach ball. Looked like some big tangled birds nest of various gauges of stripped wiring, heavy as fuck. I turned it down.

One that made me do a double take was two of those one gallon ziploc bags of nickels. I told em to go find a coinstar and get back to me. You see tons of stolen phones and tablets and laptops, but if you're smart you don't touch anything that can be tracked through GPS or other location services. like, yeah, there's ways around those things, but why bother?

One dude tried to trade me two dead possums and a fishin pole for a sack, that was an interesting encounter.

4. Sempais_nutrients had a "grass for grass" deal.

For over a decade I had a "grass for grass" deal with my guy. I cut his grass once a week for a couple grams. He just really hated mowing the lawn.

5. someGUYwithADHD resisted great temptation.

Some dude offered to steal his uncles entire star wars collection. I've seen the collection he was talking about. I'm assuming it was over 50 grand in collectibles. I wanted it BAD. Thought about it for a few days.... But bro code, nerd respect, and staying humble made me reject his offer. I couldn't even imagine losing something like that.

6. LookatitOmar made a close friend and wedding caterer through dealing.

I dealt small amounts of various drugs in addition to tending bar while in college. One of the Mexican kitchen guys wanted a bunch of Ecstasy (~$350 USD) and I obtained it for him. When it came time to pay up he said he only had $100 but he’d get the rest to me in a week or so. I was having a Super Bowl party that I had invited everyone to and a few days later he asks if he could work off the balance by catering the event.

I agreed and assumed he would flake, but homeboy showed up 30 min early with some of the most fire Tex Mex food imaginable. Trays upon trays of anything you could think of. It was unreal, and probably cost him more than he owed me. It was a big reason we served Tex Mex at my wedding, because I knew a guy who could throw down. His catering company did a great job that day, but he did an even better job as one of my groomsmen.

7. Bboyle2 would not accept someone else's Christmas presents.

Someone else's stolen Christmas presents. We made him put them back.

8. sereultra helped their weed guy graduate for free green.

Not a drug dealer but I helped my weed guy graduate by doing his online English homework in exchange for weed. I was broke, and it was easy work, so I had no problem doing it lol.

9. rulesforrebels just needed one more punch.

A punch card to a local sandwich shop that had 9 punches and just needed one more for a free sub.

10. pauljohn408 got a great bang for their buck.

When my friends & I went to pick up $10 worth of weed (We were broke high schoolers) we got 2 Little Caesar's pizzas before we went to our dealer. We ate about half the pizza waiting for our dealer to come out & when he did he jumped into the back seat where the pizza was. He saw the pizza & got super excited & said “y’all got pizza?!”

With his eyes wide on the box. My friend told him “yeah we’ll give you the rest for $20 worth of weed.” He said yes & gave us the weed & took the pizza. So we got $10 worth of extra weed for $3 worth of pizza.

11. keenestpeach has a wholesome symbiotic relationship.

Not the dealer, but I have a pretty ideal, symbiotic arrangement for my "drugs".

Buddy likes to garden, eat fish, and drink beer. I like to brew beer, catch fish, and smoke bud. Rigged up a little shed with ventilation that directs CO2 from fermentation into his greenhouse. Spent grain from the brews and waste from the fish is used for compost.

No money changes hands, rewards reaped by all.

12. SeizureSally's buddy claimed dependents on his taxes.

Not me, but a guy I got sober with. Traded a woman a whole bunch of pills for her kids' social security numbers and info, claimed them as dependents on his taxes.

13. UrBrotherJoe stumbled upon peak high school luck.

Not a drug dealer, but I once found a bag of weed in the high school parking lot and some kid I was with said, "I'll give you my Xbox 360 with the games for that"

Uh yeah dude sure I was going to throw it away anyways.

And that's how I got my first gaming console.

My parents asked where I got it and I told them the truth and they were like "huh... I mean... sure...?"

14. phosphophyIIite declined the sign.

This was in the 90's. A school near me was going through some major renovations-- they were practically going to be built again from the ground up. Anyways, a district administrator tried to trade one of those big outdoor school signs for some cocaine.

15. Yoinkie2013's friend got a whole garden.

In college I had a buddy whose house we would always hang out at. He sold all sorts of stuff. The best offer he ever got was from this 50 year old life long junky woman. She was a landscaper in her better days, and once she ran out of money she started offering my friend plants.

He rolled with it, and a few months later he had a beautiful garden in his Back yard. She even dug a pond and made a koi pond. Pretty good deal for both parties involved. And a win for us friends too because we got to chill and smoke and an awesome backyard.

16. AMaSTRIPPER_AMA traded a sandwich for a smoke.

I traded a PB&J for pot once. My dealer was hungry and I had a packed lunch.

17. Stupid_question_bot returned the storied Russian ring.

Back in the 90s when I was selling a lot of meth and ecstasy at raves I had one dude offer me a gold wedding band for a baggie.. I took it and noticed it had some Cyrillic writing on the inside. I took it to a pawn shop I knew that had a Russian owner and he told me it was from a family in Russia that was very connected to the royal family that was murdered during the revolution.

I knew the kid, and his parents, and I knew he had stolen it from his mother (who was a child of refugees from the revolution) so I just stuck it in an envelope and mailed it back to them.

18. Denny_Slim's coworker gave them the tiniest scrap of weed in exchange for a ride home.

Possibly off topic but same ballpark: I gave a co-worker a ride home once and he asked me to hold my hand out. I thought he was going to drop me a $5 bill or something, instead he placed the smallest nugget of weed I have ever seen in my life in my hand.

I tried not to laugh and I don't even think I said "Thanks!" I just nodded and smiled. Pretty sure if I tried to light it on fire in a bowl it would have turned to ash before the smoke made it to my mouth.

19. d_pock_chope_bruh could tell it was fake money right away.

Fake money, with the understanding that I knew it was fake. Dudes like, “just pass it along bruh, nobody gotta know bruh” and I’m like “I knew in like 2 seconds...real money only. BRUH.”

20. MettaAhimsa's friend George got a lot of salmon.

Not a drug dealer but my drug dealing friend once came into the kitchen of the restaurant while I'm chopping celery or something and he's dragging a big huge black garbage bag behind him. He'd already been to prison once and just got back out apparently. I said, "George is that a f-cking body?"

He goes, "F-ck yeah it is." I gripped the knife a little tighter at that point and looked for the exit. He pulled the garbage back back and he had three huge Alaskan salmon in there. Some guy didn't have enough cash so he paid him in salmon. Lol. I gutted them, cleaned them and then George paid me in salmon. It was good salmon.

Viewing all 38991 articles
Browse latest View live




Latest Images