The Pac-Manning of the world has begun.

April Fools Day is my absolute favorite time of year. April Fools! No, it's not! I pranked you so good! Actually, April 1 is a day that I loathe. For twenty-four hours, I distrust everything that pops up on my computer screen and leave bleeding people lying on the street to wallow in their supposed blood just in case they're actually Jimmy Kimmel.

That said, I kind of like Google's take on April Fools Day. Instead of actually trying to trick their users, they usually just do a bunch of weird, fun stuff designed to make people smile instead of frown in consternation.

Such is the case with Google Maps' April Fools stunt that allows you to turn any location into an actual playable Pac-Man board, provided it has sufficient roadways. Really, you can choose pretty much anyplace in the world. Just to get you started, here's a few decent boards you might want to try:

Times Square in New York City, New York

The Arc de Triomphe in Paris, France

Right Near the Batu Caves in Selangor, Malaysia

Some Random Place in Tokyo, Japan

The Place Where I Discuss My Childhood with a Psychologist in Chicago, Illinois

The Place Where I Got Mugged by Two Dudes With Guns in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Not only does this open up the concept of what a Pac-Man board should look like, but it also gives you the opportunity to exercise some personal demons. Fun!

Starbucks is launching a new line of healthy smoothies in stores, to balance all your mocha syrup latte grande Crisco blends.

Starbucks: they have healthy options. (via Getty)

If you were wondering how Starbucks was going to top a birthday cake flavored Frappucino, then here's the answer: with kale. Ahhh, cruel fate that has brought us to this pass! Not sure what's going on with CEO Howard Schultz, but this, plus the #RaceTogether campaign points to some sort of crisis. How do you turn your empire's power to good, Mr. Schultz? By forcing them to confront racism in the time it takes to order a coffee? Or by rolling out healthy smoothie options for your sugar-addled customers? None of these hard-hitting questions would have flown in the Starbucks Newsroom, which released a statement reading:

In 2014, Starbucks began testing three Evolution Fresh™ Smoothies in select Starbucks stores. After whirring up thousands of smoothies in San Jose and St. Louis, today, Evolution Fresh will bring a new take on smoothies to the $2.2 billion smoothie category[1] with the launch of Evolution Fresh™ Smoothies which are made from simple, nutritious ingredients with nothing added that nature didn't put there. Delivering 20 percent or more of recommended daily combined fruit and vegetable servings, the smoothies are made to order in three flavors including Sweet Greens, Strawberry and Mango Carrot, with the option to add fresh kale upon request.

Go green or go home and make a cup of coffee.(via Thinkstock)

Yes, gonna get Evolution Fresh Trademarked, baby. And awesome that we can add kale. Can we also add about 5 squirts of simple syrup? Thank you for once again making me a better person, Starbucks, and also for pre-masticating all my fruits and vegetables.

This short video shows "Star Wars" robot R2-D2 look for love in all the wrong places.

Oh man, haven't we all fallen in love with a mailbox before? Not an actual mailbox (probably), but someone who seems like the only match for us in the world: they're approximate size and shape of what we want, anyway. There's a sense somewhere in the back of our minds that something's not quite right. We ignore it, because we're lonely or desperate or we spent all this money on a picnic. Eventually, you can't run from the truth anymore, because your mailbox is now dating a black robot and once you go blackbot you never go backbot.

Yeah, there's some weird stuff in here.

(image by Ian O'Neill, via Mashable)

R2-D2 is in love with a completely inanimate and unresponsive mailbox, but who put the bow on it? Were they worried we'd think the mailbox was a guy and there's something homoerotic about his love? When he finally meets another unit he can go to town on, it's pink. Even though I think the gender stuff is funny since they're ROBOTS, the story behind this pinkbot is pretty real and heart melting.

All of the bots came from a collaboration between the filmmaker Evan Atherton and The R2 Builders' Club. That's right, a club dedicated entirely to building model R2s. A chapter founder, Albin Johnson, had a pink model built for his daughter Katie Johnson while she was battling childhood cancer. The replica in the film appears with Albin Johnson's permission and it is sweet to see it united with our hero. That's a lot of love in just three-and-half minutes.

You won't believe how thin the Internet's pretense is for scrutinizing a woman's body.

A photo of Reid from happier times, when she wasn't being "bullied" by the tabloids. (Getty)

Fans were shocked this week by the way bikini photos of Sharknado 3 actress Tara Reid were reproduced, zoomed in on, and gawked at by the public. Reid was photographed on Miami Beach on Friday for a photoshoot, and the images quickly spread because people are obsessed with the amount and distribution of fat on women's bodies.

A source close to the 39-year-old actress said she couldn't believe the Internet had no idea how bad it looked when it used faux concern as an excuse to stare at and pass judgment on a complete stranger's butt cheeks.

I was worried the Internet's alarm over Reid's rib cage, stomach, and thighs would be triggering to some, so I photoshopped this duckling over a screenshot from Us Magazine (please note: link is NSF-maintaining a healthy perspective):

Has this duckling had work done? (Thinkstock)

The Internet's struggle to not be a dick to Tara Reid is a reminder to us all that women's bodies—yes, even the bodies of women who regularly appear in public in bikinis!—do not exist to be tabloid fodder.

I don't appreciate all the tabloids bullying me! The Photoshop on the pics are untrue I'm just a skinny girl and I do eat! This is old news!
— Tara Reid (@TaraReid) April 1, 2015

If you know someone who wants to talk about Tara Reid's body, get them help.

Newt Gingrich made a joke on Twitter that he immediately had to explain, so you know it's good.

(via @newtgingrich)

LOL! You got me, Newt Gingrich. Though you are considered a conservative Republican who is fiercely opposed to our president, for a moment I thought you had done a complete 180 on every single one of your opinions.

Psych. Nah, I didn't.

A few of Newt's followers did though:

(via Twitter)

(via Twitter)

Guess that's why he immediately clarified that his joke "is a sign it is April Fool's day." Not a "sign of the coming Apocalypse, let's panic." Let me try an April Fools' prank, Gingrich Style:

I respect Newt Gingrich...Readers, the fact that I wrote that would indicate it is now the day we consider a popular prank day, the first of April, because you see I do not respect Newt Gingrich. So when I say that, I'm saying something I would not ordinarily say. Kind of like it is opposite day? But, please, know it is actually a very funny joke. Stay tuned for more!

Patton Oswalt launched into a 54-tweet rant to satirize Internet outrage.

Could a man this fancy cause offense?(via Twitter)

The Trevor Noah tweet scandal is just the latest example of the Internet's instant and relentless outrage machine. It's impossible for anybody to enter into the public eye without having their entire online history scoured for anything that can be used against them. In Noah's case, this included sexist and anti-semitic tweets the comedian had posted years ago.

Never one to shy away from controversy, veteran stand-up comic Patton Oswalt took to Twitter last night to weigh in on the controversy in classic Oswalt fashion. He posted a tweet with an ancient street joke, followed by 53 tweets protecting himself from every possible source of offense that anyone could take from it. It's a very well-observed piece of satire, but it's also another example of Oswalt's love for stirring the pot. What do you think? Feel free to let us know in 25-78 comments.

(1/53) Q: Why did the man* throw* butter* out of the window*? A: He wanted to see* butter fly*!
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(2/53) "Man" in my previous Tweet should not be construed as privileged, misogynist or anti-trans.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(3/53) Nor should there be ANY assumption of said man's race or religion. It could be an African American man, Asian, or any one
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(4/53) of the vast multi-cultural mosaic which make up the world we live in today. "Man" was simply an archaic placeholder for the
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(5/53) "subject" of the joke, and thus should not denote privilege nor exclude any sexuality, religion, nationality or offend any
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(6/53) feelings the joke listener may or may not have or have ever experienced in the past. Furthermore, the action of "throwing" is
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(7/53) NOT meant in any way to imply an exclusion of the differently abled, or even someone who@may have ever felt excluded from
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(8/53) or knows someone who was thus excluded.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(8/53) And the choice of "butter" as the object being thrown was in NO WAY an insult to those with a strict lacto-vegan diet or
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(9/53) ANYONE who may be lactose intolerant, might KNOW someone who is lactose-intolerant (or knows someone who is ka to-vegan) or
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(10/53) may meet someone of those two persuasions anytime in the future. Also, "butter" does not mean the joke-teller is unaware of
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(11/53) or insensitive to the abuses in our current factory-farming dairy industry, including neglect of animals or additions of
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(12/53) hormones, pesticides or other contaminants. Also, PLEASE accept this pre-emptive apology if the word "butter" was a trigger
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(13/53) for any time in the past the joke recipient may have been called a "butter face" or knows someone who was insulted in such a
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(14/53) fashion. Aesthetic shaming is real and bullying hurts us all.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(15/53) Also, again, privilege. What else? Oh yes...
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(16/53) "Out the window" was NOT meant as any sort of insult to the homeless population, in that the phrase "out the window"
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(17/53) could EASILY be construed as placing the butter-thrower in a house which
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(18/53) the butter thrower owns.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(19/53) The triggering potential for "out the window" is not to be underestimated.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(20/53) Nor should the act of THROWING AWAY food, which can be read as a violent, corporate-centric status maneuver.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(21/53) Privilege.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(22/53) Privilege.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(23/53) Privilege?
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(24/53) PRIVILEGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'nnn
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(25/53) The pronoun "he" in the 2nd part of the joke should, again, NOT be taken
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(26/53) as a patriarchal assumption.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(27/53) Parts 28 through 36 will simply be the word "problematic" for your use in any other interpretation of the pronoun "he"
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(28/53) Problematic.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(29/53) Problematic.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(30/53) Problematic.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(31/53) Problematic
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(32/53) Problematic.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(33/53) Problematic.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(34/53) Problematic
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(35/53) Problematic
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(36/53) Problematic
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(37/53) "See" is, we all know, VERY POTENTIALLY TRIGGERING to any seeing impaired or blind people hearing the joke
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(38/53) And, again, a pre-emotive apology is meekly offered.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(39/53) And the fact that Twitter does NOT offer a Braille version of its website is part of a larger problem
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(40/53) which the joke was IN ABSOLUTELY NO WAY making light of.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(41/53) Finally, the fact the man wanted to see butter "fly"
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(42/53) implies a flippant attitude towards mental illness or the subjects lack of abstract or
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(43/53) or symbolic/empathetic thought which was NOT the aim of the joke
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(44/53) or the joke teller. But context, as we know, does not matter. Only individual words and feelings do, so
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(45/53) as always, and from now on, no matter what the intent, aim, or satirical content
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(46/53) the deepest apology is offered to ANYONE
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(47/53) ANYWHERE
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(48/53) for ANY REASON WHATSOEVER
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(49/53) who found any offense in the previous joke.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(50/53) Jokes should always entertain. EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO HEARS THEM.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(51/53) A simple series of clarifying post-joke Tweets like the ones I just sent out will insure EVERYONE a gentle, comforting chuckle.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(52/53) Welcome to comedy in 2015, @Trevornoah!
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

(53/53) Also, the "come" part of "welcome" shouldn't be construed in a "faggy" way.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 1, 2015

Even if your day was already good, watching this video will make it more awesome.

YouTuber Milo the Cat (aka isthishowyougoviral) added to his pantheon of hip-hop/Muppets mashups this week (we've previously featured his "Hip Hop Hooray"/Muppets mashup). Thank you, sir! In the world of Internet mashups, The Muppets are a gift that keeps on giving and Adam Schleichkorn is the master.

This video is perfect for Gonzo, who already has that chicken entourage. He's much more of a showman than Kermit, who is really a traditional late night host, not a flashy star. Plus, he's got a car, shiny outfits and jewelry. He IS teaching me to do the Humpty and I AM doing it, in my office chair, right now.

A hospital in Jubail, Saudi Arabia admitted a man with a shoe lodged in his skull.

Saudi man hospitalized with shoe heel lodged in his head after dispute with wife http://t.co/MtMxdFx36opic.twitter.com/qUvZby0IQK
— Zahرa (@MarjaoPliss) March 31, 2015

And I thought they looked uncomfortable on your feet! This Saudi man got into a fight with his wife, and it must have gotten pretty heated. She attacked him with one of her shoes, a lacy black stiletto number, and next thing either of them knew, it was lodged firmly in his skull. The man was taken to a local hospital, where this picture was taken.

The doctors said they had never seen anything like it before, and I would certainly hope not. If this were a common occurrence, I would be very worried about Saudi Arabia. I know showing someone the underside of your shoes is a sign of disrespect in that culture, but this is taking it too far. Whatever happened to splashing a drink in someone's face?

The wide-eyed little boy about to be eaten by this horrifying Easter Bunny grew up to be one of our own.

Corey Reppond, age one-and-a-half. Demon Bunny, ageless. (via Corey Reppond's mom)

Every year, we publish our annual list of creepy Easter Bunnies. The post is a holiday tradition, with delightfully terrifying images from around the web. Most of the photos are ancient, their subjects lost to history. So imagine our surprise when we discovered through hard-hitting research (he emailed us) that one of the little boys in the photos was a contributing writer to Someecards, Corey Reppond.

Reppond did some hard-hitting research of his own (he called his mom), and here's what he said she told him about the photo:

The Easter Bunny was at Caraway's Pharmacy in Westlake, L.A. I was about 1.5. This was in 1981. The pharmacy was advertising a free 5x7 with the Easter Bunny to get people in. He was there for two weekends. My mom was cheap, because we were poor, so she took me both weekends.

After that, Corey took to wearing a helmet on Easter.

"After sitting on that bunny's lap, wouldn't you protect yourself on Easter?" says Corey.
(via Corey Reppond's mom)

This wasn't the only time Corey's mom had him sit on the lap of a frightening, costumed character.

He also provided us with this photo of himself sitting on ET's lap:

Silly Corey still believed ET was Santa Claus at this age. (via Corey Reppond's mom)

The story behind this one, according to Corey, is that "one of [my mom's] friend's sisters was babysitting me and about five or six other kids and hired a guy (from a service) to come over dressed as ET for a party she held for the kids she babysat." Oh yes. Of course. That makes perfect sense. And the Santa hat?

"Because it's Christmas." Aha.

And this one with an alligator at an airshow:

Corey Reppond's childhood was populated by the cast of someone's nightmare.
(via Corey Reppond's mom)

Luckily, Corey wasn't scarred by these photoshoots. He grew up into a totally normal adult who takes totally normal photos of himself.

So normal! (via Corey Reppond)

Well-adjusted!(via Corey Reppond)

Understands how to pose for photos with others! (via Corey Reppond)

Clearly not scarred by earlier photos of himself with people in costume! (via Corey Reppond)

We're happy we were able to find Corey (pretty much in our office). Corey's mom says that at one-and-a-half, he was "extremely happy, very creative, had gorgeous, curly hair, and [was] very entertaining." He'd "do anything for a laugh." All still true.

How sweet. What a sweet story. So adorable. Cute cute cute. Nothing freakish here.

Next thing you know, we'll find out that inside the bunny costume is...Robert Durst

Dear Ms. O'Dell, it is my pleasure to inform you that we are able to offer you a spot on the Internet.

(via Siobhan O'Dell on Tumblr)

Siobhan O'Dell isn't going to Duke University, but that's OK—Duke isn't a school for funny people, and O'Dell's response to being rejected by the Tobacco Ivy proves she's definitely one of those. Writing back to the admissions office in the bizarrely awkward style of educational institutions that (in theory) teach writing, O'Dell informed the college of their choice's unacceptability. Duke did write back, but in terms that made it clear that they never read her note OR EVER DESERVED HER IN ANY WAY:

(via Siobhan O'Dell on Tumblr)

Unfortunately for Duke, O'Dell has since rescinded her rejection of their rejection and plans to study at USC. I'm sure USC was delighted when they got a fat envelope from O'Dell containing her admission of their acceptance of her acceptance to their admission letter. I just don't want to be around when this girl has to fill out a W4.

1. Indiana Business Refuses To Send Its Christian Pizza To Gay Weddings

There are few things that summon up the image of a big, greasy pepperoni pizza more so than a gay wedding. Unfortunately for the millions upon millions of gay people in Indiana who desperately need pizza at their nuptials, there's one less outlet for their demand today. Memories Pizza in Walkerton, Indiana is taking advantage of the state's new anti-gay law to refuse service to the long lines of pizza-needing gay couples that darken their door on a daily basis. "If a gay couple came in and wanted us to provide pizzas for their wedding, we would have to say no," co-owner Crystal O'Connor told ABC 57 News. "We're not discriminating against anyone, that's just our belief and anyone has the right to believe in anything."

"Who would cater a wedding from a pizza place?" - people who have never been to Iowa
— David Burge (@iowahawkblog) April 1, 2015

2. Arkansas Would Like You To Know That It Is Just As Hateful And Petty As Indiana

Indiana Gov. Mike Pence might be trying to walk back his state's new gay discrimination law, but Arkansas legislators are rushing in to try to fill our headlines' bigotry vacuum. An anti-gay bill masquerading as religious freedom legislation—very similar to the one recently signed by Pence—was passed last night by the state congress. Gov. Asa Hutchinson, who was expected to sign it into law, is now vowing to send it back to the legislature until it is less overtly hateful.

ain't no party like an Arkansas party 'cuz an Arkansas party don't stop unless it sees what happened in Indiana then at least it slows down
— 50 shades of blond (@goldengateblond) April 1, 2015

3. Tikrit's Golden Age Of ISIS Rule Comes To An End

Tikrit's nine-month glorious age of fundamentalist despotism and fear has come to sad end, as Iraqi military forces pushed ISIS militants out and took control of city. Though the oppressive terrorist group is gone, their legacy will live on for some time in the form of booby traps and abandoned vehicles packed with explosives.

CBS reporting on "extremists from ISIS" that seized Tikrit - so as not to offend moderate to complacent ISIS invaders http://t.co/CF00ujQIk2

— Gisele Noel (@GiseleNoel) April 1, 2015

4. Half A Million Filthy Cohabitating Florida Couples Are No Longer Enemies Of The State

The Florida legislature is repealing a 147-year-old law that threatens unmarried couples who opt to live together in a "lewd and lascivious" manner with a two-month jail sentence. "The times have changed," state senator Eleanor Sobel declared. "Currently, over a half-million couples in Florida are breaking this law. The government should not intrude into the private lives of consenting adults." This act of congress officially brings Florida into the early-to-mid-20th Century.

Contrary to popular belief - and God's command - mayonnaise and mustard aren't married. They've just been living in sin.
— Brian Boone (@brianadamsboone) March 9, 2015

5. Why, God?! Why Did You have To Take The World's Oldest Woman?!

Misao Okawa—the 117-year-old Japanese woman who held the title as the oldest living person—died earlier today of unknown causes. 116-year-old Arkansas resident Gertrude Weaver has now taken the title and is likely being questioned by authorities concerning Okawa's death.

"World's Oldest Person Dies." http://t.co/MoZlftqBPq Why does this keep happening?
— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) April 1, 2015

1. This coyote who owns the night life.

This coyote squatting in an abandoned building in Queens was exploring the top of a bar where a jazz musician named Coyote Anderson was playing. Coincidence, or spiritual visitation? The coyote disappeared into the night before animal control could investigate further, perhaps searching for an after hours place. Run wild, run free. Don't forget to close your tab.

2. Helen Mirren, who sucked up helium with Jimmy Fallon.

She makes both a d*ck and a fart joke in the first 2 minutes.

3. Nick Offerman and Megan Mullally, who canceled their plans to perform in Indiana.

Congrats @GovPenceIN WE ARE CANCELING Indiana Summer of 69 tour 5/16. I WILL PLAY @IndianaUniv this Weds and donate my $ to HRC.#Usuck

— Nick Offerman (@Nick_Offerman) March 31, 2015

Though they've been playing Hoosiers on Parks and Recreation for years, the married couple is pretty unhappy with Indiana's new "religious freedom" law. They've cancelled their stop in the state for their Summer of 69: No Apostrophe tour, and though Offerman will still perform solo at Indiana University, he is donating the money to popular LGBTQ rights group, Human Rights Campaign. Way to go, guys; Indiana doesn't deserve your sexy butts.

4. This woman who dressed up simply as Tyrion's head.

Whatever is going one here, I think we can all agree that this person is making us feel things we've never felt before.

5. This girl, who built a 6 ft Left Shark entirely from Peeps.

Thought I'd never scroll to the end of this pic.(via Carroll Arts Center)

At only 13, Sydney Blacksten knows what the people want: more Left Shark. She built this replica for the annual Carroll County Arts PEEPshow, which has a pretty misleading title. This thing is taking the Internet by storm, much like its predecessor. You can see it in person until April 6th, if you happen to be in Maryland. Or just watch this video about how Peeps get made again.

Keep killing it, everybody.