Hard to believe kids drew all these incredible pictures and there's not a boob to be seen.

Stuck in time. Drawings from 1917 uncovered during MAPS renovations at #Emersonpic.twitter.com/QDd2IlL3Sx

— OKC Public Schools (@OKCPS) June 5, 2015

Contractors at Emerson High School in Oklahoma City were removing chalkboards to replace with whiteboards only to find another layer of chalkboards underneath`that had been untouched since 1917. They're very cool and creepy as hell, because the people who drew them are all dead now. But they sure knew how to draw a turkey!

A girl and her turkey. (via Oklahoma Public Schools)

Apparently every board has a lesson on Pilgrims, so elementary school hasn't changed much in 100 years. The district is working to preserve this rad discovery, saying, "This is so cool!" Not really, but that's what they should say. Or they could say, "Time grinds us all to dust, dressing children up in construction paper Pilgrim hats is eternal."

Actually the principal, Sherry Kishore, says she wonders if the drawings are by kids serving some form of prehistoric detention:

“Their names are here; I don't know whether they were students in charge that day that got to do the special chores if they were the ones that had a little extra to do because they were acting up... But it's all kinds of different feelings when you look at this.”

After feeling a sense of my own mortality, I mostly feel a little sad that no one knows how to write in cursive anymore, which will make it hard for future generations to read the Declaration of Independence when we're all iHumans.

Makes our version of the Pledge of Allegiance seem very casual in comparison.
(via Oklahoma Public Schools)

Math! Incomprehensible no matter what century.(via Oklahoma Public Schools)

Great bubble work.(via Oklahoma Public Schools)

More turkey lurking.(via Oklahoma Public Schools)

Seriously, though, where the boobs at?

Kate Moss got kicked off a plane for disruptive behavior, and on her way out called the pilot a basic bitch.

Bye bye Turkey .... Thanks so much for such a girlie yet inspirational week - will remember it forever - you all got me ready for the big half a century!!! @roseferguson_ @francutler @francesruffelle @jem_frenchie @teresatarmey and KM xx

A photo posted by sadielizafrost (@sadielizafrost) on Jun 7, 2015 at 3:09am PDT

The other passengers on the plane say that Moss had been drinking vodka out of her own luggage. I'm assuming it was in a bottle, but it's more fun to imagine she just carries around a wheeled suitcase filled to the brim with liquid.

Moss was on her way back from Turkey, where she was celebrating the 50th birthday of actress Sadie Frost with a crazy-chic aspirational Mediterranean girls' week, which is exactly how one would imagine Kate Moss vacations.

It's like, one second you're enjoying your breakfast while wearing your finest vacation pajamas...

...and the next you're being kicked off a jet by some basic pilot wearing leggings as pants while drinking a Pumpkin Spice Latte.

Another passenger on the plane said Moss was "a little drunk" and got into a disagreement with someone, but that the whole thing was an overreaction. I'm inclined to believe that because a) you know as soon as Kate Moss gets on a plane, everyone is going to be all in her business, and b) she was probably feeling pretty zen after her supermodel/actress bff eat-pray-love female friendship getaway.

Regram @roseferguson_ thanks lifeco for an amazing week - just what we all needed! @roseferguson_ @francutler @jem_frenchie @francesruffelle @teresatarmey and sleeping beauty!
A photo posted by sadielizafrost (@sadielizafrost) on Jun 6, 2015 at 1:23am PDT

When the plane landed in England, police officers escorted Moss off the aircraft. But she didn't end up getting arrested, which means the airways are still safe for vodka luggage.

Human butts are pillows.

They're both sleepy from a day of intense X-boxing.
(via imgur)

In order to achieve ergonomic nap perfection, one must nestle oneself atop a human butt and upper thigh area. Redditor Milky_moo_cow came home and found their boyfriend and dog fast asleep in this adorable position. We should all strive to one day reach the peak of Nap Mountain as efficiently as these two sleepy dudes.

John Griswell drove over 50 miles with a kitten in his engine.

Obviously, a guy who drives a Tesla Model S cares about animals. So much so, that when a feral kitten crawled into the engine cavity of his fancy, environmentally friendly, electric car, he took it to a mechanic to have the bottom taken off instead of just allowing nature to take its course: a horrible death.

This looks like the skeleton of a derby race car.(photo by John Griswell, via Green Car Reports)

And was the kitten thankful? No! It was mad as hell. It had gone through a lot. Removing the bottom of Griswell's car was definitely a last resort, after many days of trial and error and also a fair amount of driving before it was even discovered. Here's the epic tale:

"I think it climbed in sometime on Friday while I was out and about. Amazingly, it was safe in the cavity around the motor, even while I was driving. On Saturday, I noticed something hanging from the bottom of my car while it was parked on an incline. So I took a look and saw a paw hanging from the passenger rear-wheel well. I figured it was a cat and it had run out when I moved. Later that night, we heard meowing from the garage.

"Thinking that I'd hit a dead cat and its paw was stuck up in there, I backed up the car to get a better look, and it was gone. After searching around, I pointed a flashlight through the rear wheel and past the suspension and frame, and saw a pair of little eyes staring back at me.

"We put out food and left the garage door open, hoping it would leave overnight. But it only ate the food and climbed back in. On Sunday, we borrowed a live trap from a friend, put a can of tuna fish in it, and let the car sit all day. This time the kitten came out, took a dump in the garage, left the tuna alone, and climbed back into the Tesla. So on Monday morning I took the car to the Tesla Service Center for help."

I love a story that includes someone or something taking a dump in your garage. And the cherry on the sundae is the little guy is being adopted by a friend of Griswell, finally leaving its days on the road behind.

Poor baby boo! Trust us, you're better off.(photo by John Griswell, via Green Car Reports)

Alicia Anderson had a heartwarming surprise for everyone at her graduation ceremony.

Alicia Anderson.(via Fox 17)

All parents are proud to see their kids graduate from high school. But the Andersons of Ionia, Michigan saw something at their daughter Alicia's graduation they never expected. They saw their daughter walk again for the first time in two years.

18-year-old Alicia suffers from Wilson's disease, a rare genetic disorder that requires her to use a wheelchair and talk-to-text technology. She had no symptoms until she was 16, but since then, she's had to relearn most of her basic skills. Her parents didn't think she would live to see her graduation, but she surprised them. And she had more surprises to come.

At school, she began relearning how to walk, but kept it secret from her entire family. Then, on graduation day, she got to her feet and proudly walked to receive her diploma. Everyone in the crowd erupted into cheers, but nobody was happier than Alicia herself. She told Fox 17, "It was the best day of my life."

Alicia is still learning, and working to become more independent. She hopes to live on her own one day, and her dream is to get a job at the University of Michigan Hospital. That's the hospital that saved her life.

It'll be during "Treehouse of Horror," but still.

He dreamed a dream.(via Fox)

Hate and love are often very thinly separated. Both require passion, both inspire 'mentionitis,' and both fill up our minds with thoughts of that person, day in and day out. For Sideshow Bob, the person who he has hated with all the fervor of true love will finally die at his hand. Die, Bart, die.

Show runners revealed that the impossible had become possible at an ATX Austin festival panel on Saturday. Executive producer Al Jean said:

“I hated frustration comedy so we'll scratch that itch.”

That itch will be scratched during one of the Simpsons' famous Halloween specials (reminder: start working on the spooky version of your name now), so Bart will be reanimated for future episodes...perhaps to live on for all eternity, since it seems unlikely this show will ever be cancelled.

Still!

.@thesimpsons#EverySimpsonsEver Amazed how excited the media are to report in the murder of a ten year old boy http://t.co/sytwCFzA9H

— Al Jean (@AlJean) June 7, 2015

Who is Sideshow Bob without Bart Simpson? A man with no purpose is naught but a figment. I'm sure Bob will wax eloquently on the subject, so until we get to reflect on the denouement of his 'special project,' let's admire his object work.

The only person truly worthy of a Taylor Swift mashup is Taylor Swift.

So it makes sense that someone combined "We're Never Ever Getting Back Together" and "Bad Blood" to create "We Are Never Ever Getting Bad Blood." They also get extra points for mashing up the two music videos so that the maximum possible amount of Taylor Swift content can be absorbed through both the ears and eyes.

I've stated previously that I look forward to a day when Taylor Swift songs replace all genres of music, and this Taylor-on-Taylor mashup is a productive step in that direction. If any go-getters are reading this, there's still an opportunity for you to contribute toward the utopian society I'm describing. We need someone to create one mashup combining all the best songs off of Red and 1989, including but not limited to "I Knew You Were Trouble," "22," "The Lucky One," "Out of the Woods," "Blank Space," and "Style."

TMZ caught the singer taking about a million mulligans.

We'll stop laughing at Justin Bieber when he stops making it so easy. He's had plenty of opportunities to show us he's growing up, but every time he manages to act like a spoiled brat.

The intrepid vultures at TMZ just caught this exquisite video of Biebs hitting the links. In the course of a minute, you can see him transition from a cool, collected adult to a big baby. He hits a bad shot and slams his club into the ground in frustration (bad etiquette). Then he pours about five balls on the course and takes mulligan after mulligan (against the rules). He better have marked those shots on his scorecard. Otherwise I'll lose all respect for him.

Go bluetooth yourself!

Guess where this goes.(via)

If there's one thing about sex that kind of a bummer, it's that's there's not nearly enough data involved. I mean, sure it's fun. But you can't put fun into a spreadsheet and then turn it into a chart that allows you to monitor the amount of fun you had on a week-by-week basis over the course of a fiscal quarter. And if you can't do that, then what's the point, really?

Luckily, that's all changed! Somebody has finally figured out a way to harvest the previously wasted data from all of that sex you're having. Introducing Lovely, a wearable sex tracking device that's kind of like one of those Fitbit exercise tracker things, except waaaaaay sexier. Here's the video from its creators' IndieGogo page:

In addition to fitting snugly around the base of your member and vibrating like a good cock ring should, it also connects to your phone via bluetooth, and measures things like calories burnt, thrusts thrusted and the intensity of your sex-having.

I know what you're thinking: But I don't have a penis. Can I still use the Lovely? Absolutely. It also fits on your finger, on a dildo, on a tube of toothpaste, the neck of a soprano ukulele probably, and pretty much whatever you use to do the sex with your partner:

The crowdsourcing campaign has raised about one-fifth of its $95,000 goal after a week, so it seems like it will be coming any time now.

Spoiler alert: they spoiled Stannis last night. Well, someone did.

"Maybe we should have tried the leeches first..."

IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE EPISODE AND YOU ARE READING THIS, YOU ARE CLEARLY NOT SOMEONE WHO HEEDS SPOILER WARNINGS. NEVERTHELESS, SPOILERS.

Season 5 of Game of Thrones has seen a series high for departures from George R. R. Martin's books, earning showrunners David Benioff and D.B. Weiss their share of both criticism (Sand Snakes) and praise (Hardhome). So, many assumed that last night's horrific events involving fan favorite Shireen, Princess of the House Baratheon, were also concocted by D&D. Well, put down your Internet pitchforks, people. It wasn't their idea, and it had to happen, as they explain in this "Inside The Episode" segment that aired after last night's hard-to-unsee events. (The clip also covers the rest of the episode, so at least you'll get some Drogon to cheer you up.)

I'll let them explain why Stannis's personality made this outcome inevitable, but the main takeaway is this was George R.R.'s idea and likely [spoiler?] a scene from Book 6. Presumably a chapter from Stannis's perspective that ends with him saying "I hope no one made the mistake of liking me, because I bet this would be very disappointing." How bad was it? It was make-you-forget-about-that-horrible-pedophilia-scene bad. That bad.

In retrospect, it's amazing we even considered it not being George's handiwork. In George R.R. Martin's universe, being a genuinely good person who could really make the world a better place should be grounds to commit someone for suicidal tendencies.

Well, if the previews for next week's finale are any indication [spoilers], Winter is Pausing, for which I am sure Melisandre will claim credit. I don't think Shireen will bring Stannis The Worstest the victory he craves, though. Don't be surprised (pure speculation on my part) if that blood magic accidentally helps Daenerys or Jon Snow, who both seem much more tied to the destiny of the world than Stannis "Technically Correct" Baratheon. Plus, maybe Ramsay will die. Or else it'll be Sansa because life is cruel and meaningless. I don't even know anymore.

Murad Osmann is famous for his photographs that show him following his girlfriend around the world. Now we get to see their breathtaking wedding photos.

#followmeto the wedding with my love @yourleo. I promise to hold your hand and tell you I love you every day for the rest of our lives. Спасибо за платье бутик Vera Wang Москва, лучшему агентству @wedoagency и лучшему декоратору @lidseventhouse за эту сказку :)!!
A photo posted by Murad Osmann (@muradosmann) on Jun 7, 2015 at 10:34am PDT

If you find yourself reveling in the mystical fairyland of the wedding between Murad Osmann and Natalia Zakharova, you are not alone. Osmann takes beautiful photographs of his girlfriend-now-wife, and this wedding photo lives up to his reputation. His 2.5 million Instagram followers seem to agree. I'd follow this man following his wife anywhere, just to be momentarily transported to another dimension in space-time!

The bride and the wedding planner also posted some incredible photos, as you can see below.

#followmeto the wedding whith my love @muradosmann promise to hold your hand and tell you I love you every day for the rest of our lives. Спасибо за платье бутик Vera Wang Москва, вы сделали мою мечту реальной !!!!! Лучшему агентству @wedoagency и лучшему декоратору @lidseventhouse, красивому месту @zhavoronkieventhall ....за эту сказку :)!!Друзья, люблю вас ❤️❤️❤️❤️
A photo posted by yourleo (@yourleo) on Jun 7, 2015 at 10:34am PDT

Repost from @wedoagency Свадьба, которую ждали миллионы поклонников проекта #followmeto по всему миру состоялась! Интернет пестрит кадрами с торжества #osmannwed Мы были счастливы создавать декор для этой уникальной пары! Наташа @yourleo и Мурад @muradosmann , огромное вам спасибо за доверие!!! Это было волшебное приключение! Мы ваши навеки!!!!! Decor - @lidseventhouse Planning - @wedoagency Photo - @andrew_bayda Venue @zhavoronkieventhall #lidseventhouse #osmannwed #follow_lids #wedding #weddingdecor #magic #ceremony #ceremonydecor #decorations #stylishwedding #chik #topevent #topwedding #свадьба #шик #люкс #красота #мечта #кудаприводятмечты
A photo posted by Lida Simonova (@lidseventhouse) on Jun 7, 2015 at 3:50am PDT

Repost from @yourleo My dearest Fairy Tale @yourleo and @muradosmann , THANK YOU SOOO MUCH for this adventure!!!! That's a dream of every event-designer - to make a decor of your dream!!!! You made my dream to come true!!! Thanks for your trust! I'm yours forever!!!♡♡♡♡♡♡♡ #osmannwed #lidseventhouse #follow_lids #weddingoftheyear #mirracle #magicceremony #ceremonydecor
A photo posted by Lida Simonova (@lidseventhouse) on Jun 7, 2015 at 6:33am PDT

In just one day, Starbucks has released six new ways to ingest caffeine-powered sugar syrup.

One to commemorate each manic year we've had together.
(All images via Starbucks)

Today, Starbucks added six new Frappuccino flavors to the menu. And you can vote for your favorite. But you'll still be able to get any of the flavors in the future. And you also could in the past, if you asked for them. But it's not really about the suspense. It's about popping sugar, caffeine, and flavors right into your little brain.

Red VelvetThis is the flavor that's most like drinking a cupcake other than the cupcake flavor.

Cinnamon RollPair this with a cinnamon roll to bring out the cinnamon flavors in the roll and the roll flavors in the drink.

Lemon Bar
The subtle, citrus-infused tones make this a Frappucino for a more refined palette. Just kidding.

Cupcake

Which part of the cupcake do you like? The top, the bottom, or mushing it all together in a blender with coffee and chemicals?

Caramel Cocoa Cluster
Honestly, this one seems like old news.

Cotton Candy
The fun, pink hue is achieved by blending vanilla, raspberry, whipped cream, and Pepto-Bismol.

The marketing director of Starbucks explained:

“In celebration of the 20th anniversary of Frappuccino and the thousands of flavor combinations created by our enthusiastic customers, we are excited to introduce six Fan Flavor Frappuccino beverages. Over the years we have seen many creative recipes from our customers, and the six Fan Flavor Frappuccino beverages featured in the Flav-Off contest represent a few of the most popular recipes.”

Like customers cooked their own Frappuccinos? That seems weird. Starbucks wants you to tweet about which flavor you like best and has created "team" hashtags for each one. But that seems kind of frivolous when there are more important team hashtags to advocate for.

You'll feel proactive scrolling through this list in comparison.

He's got everything he needs, what's the problem? (via Cheezburger)

Though social media is itself one of the laziest ways to "connect" with other people, these folks have made laziness via status update a true art form. Every one of these people had to have at least enough energy to type. Yet, their writing indicates that they're engulfed by the moist, sticky mouth of Slothfulness. I salute you, lazy people, and your commitment to wearing sweatpants to work, eating dry cereal, and letting YouTube play whatever it wants after the first video you clicked on ends. Laze on.

Poetry isn't dead, it's taking a disco nap.(via Imgur)

Yes, laziness explains all the rolls under my clothes, too.(via Lamebook)

When pretending to do work seems like more work than the work does.(via Cheezburger)

It doesn't take 1000 words to summarize the greatest movie of our time.(via Imgur)

He draws the line at hair brushing.(via Imgur)

"Yeah, cuz he just lays there."(via Lamebook)

It's important to understand the commitment required.(via Imgur)

If you're in bed all day, you might as well get #TheDressed.(via Cheezburger)

Hello, operator? I'm looking for my phone.(via Imgur)

Can't even be bothered to run a spell check.(via Imgur)

I just gotta power through a few more hundred status updates!!! (via Imgur)

That's so lazy it's work.(via Imgur)

This was the night before their thesis was due.(via Cheezburger)

Both?(via Imgur)

Call me trashy for putting together this list of upper-butt-area tattoos, but you clicked.

A good reminder of what can happen if you get too close. (via)

I don't generally approve of calling women, or men (who are also on this list), tramps. However, we've all agreed that a tattoo in this particular location is the stamp of a tramp, so here we are. If we accept the notion that tramp stamps exist, we must also accept the idea that some tramp stamps are better than others. Therefore, some must be worse. Way worse. These are not necessarily the trampiest stamps. I tried not to pick anything NSFW (besides some mild buttcrack action). These are not necessarily the worst-drawn. They are just the not-goodest, the awful-most, the terriblifficest. These are those. I hope everyone involved, including me, is happy with themselves and the world right now.

Very official looking. Let no one doubt your trampiness. (via)

God doesn't explicitly forbid tramp stamps, but it's implied. (via)

Ah, so that's where you got your poor decision making skills from. (via)

Thanks for spelling out for us what all tramp stamps imply. (via)

She has to permanently maintain that pose, but it works. (via)

And at the bottom you can see the point at which the tattoo artist said "Nope, that's it. I'm not going any further."(via reddit)

The owner allegedly thinks this tattoo is hilarious. The owner also allegedly thinks.
(via reddit)

"I refuse to be defined by words when an image can say it so well." (via reddit)

I hope those frogs are licensed dermatologists because you should get those moles checked, dude. (via reddit)

"No, having two tramp stamps isn't warning enough...I need to be clear."(via reddit)

On their own, they're whatever. United, these tattoos might have been what convinced Prince to go back to using letters to spell his name.(via reddit)

Love: the only force powerful enough to let someone look the owner of this tattoo in the eye and say "nah, it looks fine." (via reddit)

Kyle is apparently her husband and a beginner tattoo artist. Or was her husband, anyway.
(via reddit)

This is literally an advertisement for regret.(via Mandatory)

You don't need to write it. You just need to hang out around middle-schoolers with your crack showing. (via Pinterest)

Remember that g-string tattoo from up top? It turns out guys can play that game, too, and they can play it way worse:

This looks like a funny mishap from a King of the Hill episode.(via KLAQ)

OK, this one is kinda NSFW, but mostly WTF.

I would never, ever, ever go within a mile of that butt ever again.(via reddit)

Ready for some eyebleach? Here's an actually adorable one.

PLEASE TELL ME YOUR SPOUSE HAS A MATCHING LADY STAMP.(via reddit)

At his school's talent show last week, Arkansas 11-year-old My'Kel Lewis quietly took the stage.

"Just singin' an impossible to sing song, NBD." (Via YouTube)

And then he took the audience's breath away with his sweet and perfect cover of Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You."

Okay, we know it's originally a Dolly Parton song, but Lewis sang Houston's smooth, stylish R&B version from The Bodyguard that topped the charts for what felt like several years in the early '90s. He got a standing ovation…before he was even done.

When he hits those high notes that only Whitney Houston could reach, the crowd positively erupts. (Still, I feel kind of bad for this kid, because even at this young age he's clearly experienced a great love, and then lost that love, such is his ability to sell the song's emotional pain.)

One of the teachers at University Heights taped the performance and sent it to Ellen DeGeneres, so expect to see Lewis crush it for Ellen in person in the next couple of weeks.