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Two 30-somethings fall in love only to find out they used to eat graham crackers together every day.

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What if you met your true love when you were in pre-school, but didn't see each other again for 30 years? Sounds like the premise of a terribly cheesy romantic comedy you'd drag your boyfriend to against his will, but for Justin Pounders and Amy Giberson it's the real thing. The two 33-year-olds were navigating the soul-crushing world of online dating, when they found each other and something just clicked. "I saw Amy and I just was really drawn to her," Pounders told TODAY. 

We found love in a hopeless place, we found love eating so much paste.

The Florida couple had no idea they'd met before, but Justin mentioned on their first date that he'd majorly crushed on a girl named Amy in pre-school. They kept noticing coincidences and mutual friends, until finally one day, Justin mentioned "good old Sunshine Pre-School," by name. That blew the lid off it, and the couple soon discovered that they were inseparable as 3-year-olds. Justin's mom even dug up some old class photos of the two of them. 

Geez guys, get a play room. 

"I just never in a million years would have imagined that we were like little pre-school sweethearts," Pounders said. 

Kind of makes you regret not keeping tabs on that little boy who blew milk bubbles with his nose during snack time. 


The creator of Broadway's 'Hamilton' freestyle battled on 'The Tonight Show.' Fallon couldn't even deal.

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Lin-Manuel Miranda, the creator and star of Broadway musical Hamilton, was on The Tonight Show on Friday night. And everyone watching had one of those moments when you see someone exhibit such a high level of skill that you suddenly feel horrible about everything you used to think you were good at. Jimmy Fallon had Miranda play a new game called "Wheel of Freestyle" (similar to "Wheel of Impressions") that involved creating a new freestyle rap using three randomly generated words. Miranda faced off against Tariq from The Roots. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w31jboLYcH4

There were strong showings from both contestants, but the best part of this video might be a bewildered Jimmy Fallon yelling "Oh my gosh! How do you do that?"

If you think raising your kids religious makes them nicer, science has bad news for you.

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A new report has found that children from religious households are meaner than their secular counterparts. These findings were the result of an international study conducted by seven universities across six different nations. They were described in a paper titled "The Negative Association Between Religiousness and Children’s Altruism Across the World," published in Current Biology last week. The study is meant to challenge the idea that believing in God is necessary for having a sense of morality (which 53% of adults believe to be true).

Researchers got to the conclusion by putting children ages 5-12 together in groups and making them participate in two different experiments. The first experiment involved giving them stickers but telling them there were not enough to go around for everyone. Whether or not they shared was then observed. The second experiment involved gauging childrens' reactions to a video of children "pushing and bumping" one another. In both experiments, the students from religious households were "less altruistic than children from non-religious households," while the children who had been exposed to religion the most "exhibit[ed] the greatest negative relations."

"Dear father, give me the strength to understand these confusing graphs."

There are some minor but important clarifications to the study's conclusions. According to the report, "[t]he numbers of Jewish, Buddhist, Hindu, agnostic and other children [observed] were too small to be statistically valid," so the study really found that secular children are "nicer" than just Christian and Muslim children, not religious children as a whole (Christians and Muslims make up about two thirds of all religious people in the world, however). 

A big important graph.

The countries studied were the U.S., Canada, China, Jordan, Turkey, and South Africa, so the findings only hold water if you consider this grouping to be representative of the world's religious population, and if you accept that the experiments represent these children's kindness as a whole, because correlation does not mean causation.

Specifically, the study found that children from religious backgrounds were "more judgmental," "more punitive," and "less altruistic," than non-religious kids. Muslim kids considered "interpersonal harm" to be meaner than the Christian kids perceived it. They did, however, exhibit more punitive behavior than their Christian counterparts. On the other hand, the parents of the religious children were more likely than secular parents to consider their children to be "empathetic" and "sensitive."

Richard Dawkins is probably having an orgasm right now. 

A mom is furious that her 11-year-old daughter was kicked off the cheerleading team because of hair.

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ABC 13reports that 11-year-old Makayla Fallaw of Tomball, Texas has been kicked off her cheerleading team after refusing to straighten her hair. Even though she's been cheering since she was four and can do back flips, her curly hair is unacceptable at Woodlands Elite Cheer, which is run by Kevin Tonner, a guy with this facial hair:

Smooth business on top, ragged party on the bottom.

According to Makayla's mom, Jenny, she found out after her daughter joined the team that she'd be required to straighten her hair during competitions:

Just a few weeks ago is the first time I had heard about a special hairstyle. I felt like I might make my daughter feel like her hair is not good enough because she's not like other girls...It would destroy her hair, so I wanted to explain to them my reasoning.

Here's the hair mom is taking a stand for:

Curly and proud.

After Jenny emailed Tonner, they had a meeting to discuss the situation and Tonner didn't like momma's tone. He explained why he gave Makayla the axe, and um, it has nothing to do with her hair, okay?:

When you come into the sport, you understand there is make up to it. There's hair to it. We were trying to make the exception. We were trying to find a compromise and a happy medium. And she wasn't willing to have a compromise. She was very defensive... It wasn't about hair. It was about we don't want this negativity on our team.

Tonner also noted not all cheer teams actually straighten their hair, but Makayla's had voted on the style for competitions. Makayla must have been out that day.

Experience the horror of almost being bitten by a great white shark from the comfort of your dry desk.

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A couple of divers in Gansbaai, South Africa, had a close call with an angry shark, and caught the whole thing on video. The thrill seekers laugh when the great white attempts to tear them to shreds with his sharp teeth, and fails. Not sure how hilarious they would find it it without that metal cage though. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=po4WFxkOS3s

It's hard to watch this and not feel bad for the shark. What if someone put leftover Halloween candy in a cage and then laughed at you when you went in for a big bite? No fair! 

Couple writes letter to other pre-K parents to explain their 'gender-creative' child and to brag.

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Anoosh Jorjorian and Kevin Miller's child Ocho (not his real name) started pre-Kindergarten this year. At just 6 years old, Ocho doesn't yet know that society is obsessed with labels—be it male, female, or transgender—and he's enjoying youth, in a stage Jorjorian and Miller describe as "gender-creative." The couple wrote a letter to the parents of Ocho's classmates to film them in. Their goal was to create a safe space for Ocho at school.

Meet Ocho.

Jorjorian and Miller forwarded the letter to the non-profit Black Girl Dangerous to inspire and inform other parents. And maybe to brag about how progressive their family is. No parents can resist bragging.

 

Hello, TK class,

It was a pleasure to see some of you at the TK play date on Saturday!

We wanted to write all of you about our child, Ocho. Ocho was born as a boy, but we are currently describing him as “gender creative.” We know this might be a bit unfamiliar to the parents and possibly a bit confusing for the kids, so we wanted to outline how we are talking about Ocho’s gender with his teacher as well as open a space in case anyone has questions for us.

We know that many boys often dress as girls when they are young. Ocho has been expressing a preference for girl clothing for over a year, becoming more consistent with this preference over time. Sometimes Ocho identifies as a girl, or talks about becoming a girl.

We have told Ocho that he can be whichever gender he wants, and that if he doesn’t want to choose, he doesn’t have to. Most of the time, he prefers not to identify as a girl or a boy, but just as “Ocho.”

We don’t know yet if Ocho is transgender. We are in touch with a few transgender friends as well as parents raising transgender kids to make sure we are supporting him as well as we can as his identity develops. Currently, we are still using male pronouns with him at home.

We often hear from other kids, “Is Ocho a girl or a boy?” In those situations, we say, “Sometimes Ocho feels like a girl, sometimes he feels like a boy. But he’s always Ocho, and he likes to play lots of different things.” Ocho does, in fact, like “boy” things, like trains and airplanes, as well as “girl” things, like Frozen and Strawberry Shortcake.

We know this is unfamiliar territory, and we are trying to work it out as we go along. We hope that if you have any questions, or if your child asks you questions that you don’t know how to answer, that you will feel comfortable talking with us.

Thanks so much for reading through this, and we look forward to a wonderful first year of elementary school! We hope to meet more of you in person as the year progresses.

Yours,
Anoosh Jorjorian and Kevin Miller

Here's hoping that Ocho finds the support he needs at school, and that his real name is nothing like "Ocho."

Bouncy goats + bouncy trampoline = bouncy feelings.

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Goats and trampolines. Trampolines and goats. Is there anything better? There are competitors, of course. Tiny goats jumping on large dogs. Tiny goats acting like small dogs. Tiny goats jumping on large horses. Goats running 40 km/hr in the Outback just because. The Goat Simulator video game. Stampeding baby goats. Goat kids in teeny-tiny sweaters. Baby goats trying to get comfortable on a bean bag. Goats partying to Baha Men. And of course, goats in trees. Are any of these as joy-inducing as this amazing footage of already-bouncy goats bouncing on a trampoline?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7NI880PgV5E

Oh, and of course, other goats on trampolines:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOsxgKqbjIU

Pamela Anderson is cured of Hep C, celebrates by posting nude photo to Instagram, like you do.

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Great to hear from Pamela Anderson, especially with such good news. She announced on Instagram that after famously contracting Hepatitis C from her ex-husband, Tommy Lee, she is now cured. She told the story years ago of how he allegedly failed to disclose that he carried the virus before sharing a tattoo needle with her:

A tattoo artist came to our hotel because Tommy wanted a specific tattoo. He was doing his tattoo, and I was looking through the art book that this guy brought. And I said, ‘Oh, my God, oh, that is such a beautiful tattoo. Can I have that, too?'” Anderson recalls. “And he goes, ‘Well I only brought one needle, but you guys are married. I mean there’s nothing you could give each other, is there?’ And I was like, ‘No.’ And Tommy goes, ‘No.’ I get the tattoo, time passes, and after a physical, my doctor calls and says I have hepatitis C.

Anderson probably thought she'd be carrying a reminder of her ex's deceitfulness forever, but nope:

https://instagram.com/p/9w8WJZiSln/

Her caption reads:

I am CURED!!! - I just found out #nomorehepc #thankyou#blessing #family #prayer #live I pray anyone living with Hep C can qualify or afford treatment. It will be more available soon. I know treatment is hard to get still...#dontlosehope #itworkedforme#thereisacure #love #happy#americanliverfoundation #celebration#Idontknowwhattodo #iwanttohelp#cannes #iloveboats #onthesea #free

Yes, Hepatitis C can be cured, but the cocktail of drugs needed to make it happen can run tens of thousands of dollars, so not many people will be anytime soon. Also, "cured" is somewhat in quotation marks, because for Hep C it means that when tested you don't have any of the virus in your blood six months after ending drug treatment. The final drug in the mix was only approved in 2011, so it's hard to say what the long-term results will be. However, they are very promising, and Anderson has every right to scream her celebration from the rafters. Looking good, lady:

https://instagram.com/p/9Br5bNCSoG/?taken-by=pamelaanderson

Article 20

Justin Bieber told Ellen what he thought of his penis photo and was surprisingly chill.

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It's "Bieber Week" at EllenWhile that sounds like a middle school spirit committee stunt, it's actually just Justin Bieber singing on the show for five consecutive days. To start things off right, Ellen DeGeneres sat Bieber down and asked the pop start about the hard news that penetrated the internet — the paparazzi photo of his penis. 

While Biebs was in a bungalow in Bora Bora (say that 10 times fast), a paparazzo in a boat snapped a picture of him naked. His manager, Scooter Braun, called him up and said, "Yo, I hate to tell you this, but... your penis is on the internet." 

"Stop, you're making me blush, dude," he says, not about the penis pic, but about the bikini-clad lady who was in the other end of the photo. Bieber kept insisting that they weren't dating. Ellen was confused why he would be naked around someone he wasn't dating. but the Biebs didn't want to be the one to tell her about Friends With Benefits. Meanwhile, his attitude about the penis pic itself was pretty laid-back.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IAb0xXPB4FY

Article 18

Article 17

World's worst 16-year-old kidnapped and planned to kill his great-grandma.

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Hazel Abel, an 86-year-old great-grandmother from Washington, was recently kidnapped by her own great-grandson. Abel was getting ready to watch Dancing with the Stars on Monday night when she got a knock at the door. It was her 16-year-old great-grandson, Dylan, along with his 15-year-old friend Billy and a 14-year-old girl. They hit her over the head, bound and gagged her, and stuffed her in the trunk of her own car, which they then stole, along with Abel's purse and a butcher knife from her kitchen. She begged them not to hurt her dog, Tessa, who was placed in the trunk alongside her. 

https://www.facebook.com/NowThisNews/videos/940551269368331/

She was in the car for six hours, during which time they only stopped once, in order to get gas. According to Abel, they "played some really crappy music" during the trip. They finally parked at a Walmart to get toiletries, leaving her in the trunk. She decided that it was now or never. She undid her bindings (which were poorly applied—according to Abel, the kidnappers "didn't go to Boy Scouts" or anything), reached around, found the emergency trunk release, climbed out, ran into the gardening section of the store, and got the employees to help her. They called the police, and gave her clothing, food, and water while she waited. The teenagers ran from the store when they saw Abel with an employee, but were arrested at a gas station a few hours later.

Dylan and Billy.

Dylan already had a criminal past before this incident. In 2013, he pled guilty to residential burglary. He also attended a "juvenile justice program" after leaving high school. It was clear that he wanted her car and her money—he had already stolen $60 from her the week before, and he was angry when he later came back for more and only found $2. It wasn't just about money, though; discoveries made after the arrest justify Abel's suspicion that the teens were going to kill her, since they were, uh, planning to kill her:

(Martin) and Underwood had planned on knocking Abel out, killing her, putting her body in the trunk of her car, and then disposing of the body by burning the car,” District Attorney Jeffery Auxier, wrote in a probable cause affidavit used to hold the two boys.

Underwood also reportedly said he and Martin “discussed letting (Abel) go three miles into a canyon because she wouldn’t be able to get out, or knocking her unconscious and leaving her at a truck stop,” court documents said.

And documents say that Martin also admitted to a detective “that he had discussed how to get rid of Abel’s body with (the girl) and Underwood.

The children are in custody and will be tried as adults for multiple felonies. Abel is shaken by the traumatic incident, and told reporters that she'll "never understand it or accept it." She is thankful to be alive and uninjured, though, and grateful that Tessa is doing okay as well.

Abel and Tessa.

She'd also like to know if anybody DVR'd that episode of Dancing with the Stars.

The Internet is having a field day with this pantless shovel-wielder.

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Despite their suave reputation, France also has its share of weirdos. One of these weirdos attacked Allain Bougrain-Dubourg, the president of the Bird Protection League (LPO) with a shovel, sans pants (as they say in Paris).

https://twitter.com/pourmecoffee/status/663733366915776513

The angry, unnamed man had set a number of finch traps, and the LPO was dismantling them. The finches are trapped for food, but that's been illegal since 1976. Of course, a guy who dresses and defends himself like a caveman probably doesn't change quickly. Here's a back view:

https://twitter.com/afpfr/status/663700374059139072?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

Obviously, pictures of this maniac are delighting everyone across cultures. Especially the Internet wags. Vive La France!

https://twitter.com/OnZeLeft/status/663725661064966144?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfwhttps://twitter.com/MYTF1News/status/663737406491910146https://twitter.com/fdaudens/status/663739683004772352https://twitter.com/BFMTV/status/663743493035134976https://twitter.com/friedw/status/663788621485514752https://twitter.com/IndienFlexible/status/663757239132516352https://twitter.com/Tristan_Brtloot/status/663711685732077568?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfwhttps://twitter.com/CorentinBCG/status/663722713115181056?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfwhttps://twitter.com/Bullecomm/status/663707886607073280?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfwhttps://twitter.com/YanYannoche/status/663741341717929984https://twitter.com/PCarnehan/status/663723794935250944?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfwhttps://twitter.com/Tristan_Brtloot/status/663717828105781248?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfwhttps://twitter.com/eveningsam/status/663706069311574016?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfwhttps://twitter.com/Meriadeck/status/663715876433170432?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

There are a couple people who are not delighted by the photo and it's viral popularity: Monsieur Sans Pants and his family. His son was interviewed and said, "Allain Bougrain-Dubourg want to have their picture taken and get on television, [that's] his business. It does not have to get involved in it." It=The Internet, probably. The translation makes it hard to say, but trust us, Monsieur Sans Pants Junior, the Internet did have to get involved.

Article 14


Pizza Rat has been turned into a robot to prank the New Yorkers who love him.

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It was the symbol of New York City tenacity that resonated around the world: Pizza Rat, the humble rodent living life on the platform edge, was a viral sensation and popular Halloween costume. The people at PrankvsPrank recently decided to immortalize the meme in robot form, and drove the robot around the city. It turns out that people are less enthusiastic about Pizza Rat when it's near them and could possibly carry the bubonic plague.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxRdilc6_A4

Here's an instructional video on how to make your own Robot Pizza Rat to scare your roommate in the shower or to recycle old pizza.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLcSDFtHOGA

Article 12

Here's an awkward-as-heck video of Martha Stewart blowing off Drew Barrymore.

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Martha Stewart has smoked weed with Snoop Dogg, spent time in jail, and killed at Justin Bieber's roast.* In short, she's cooler than Drew Barrymore and knows it. And M-Stew let everybody else know it, too, during a recent cooking segment on Ellen where Drew joined Ellen and Martha in the kitchen for reasons that are not entirely clear during this clip. 

Over the course of the segment, Martha repeatedly pulls the most high-status of high-status moves: straight-up ignoring Drew. It gets so awkward that Ellen tries to intervene in the same tone of voice that a pre-school teacher might use to suggest that kids need to start sharing blocks. This finally gets Martha to actually say something nice-but-dismissive about Drew's work: "Oh, she's doing a beautiful job," and Drew can't hide her shock. But, to be fair, Drew might've also been drunk by that point. Actually, everyone might've been drunk by that point.

You can watch the entire awkward, booze-filled segment here, including a moment where Ellen appears to use a spring roll wrapper as a dental dam:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OyuKLjTXxeo

* Then again, is it any surprise that a food celebrity is great at roasting? HEYO. 

Here's the 'Drunk History' of how your bra was designed to lift and separate.

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Actress Paget Brewster got called in to tell the story of Mary Phelps Jacob and her perfect invention for supporting the "boobles." Jacob is played by Parker Posey, and she makes a very convincing 19-year-old. Famous people never age! According to a drunk Brewster, Jacob came up with her "lift and separate" idea one night when she just couldn't bear to be squeezed into a corset one more night. It's really the perfect story of an inconvenienced woman turned enterprising capitalist:

You're right, patent officer. Boobs have been around a long time. So has alcohol. So has getting drunk and talking about boobs. But they're still all fun things!

Article 9

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