Sometimes I get so bored at work that I actually think about doing some work.
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If People Reacted Honestly To Baby Pictures On Facebook
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I'd love to hear the details of your juice cleanse while I eat my burger.
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Let me know the absolute minimum I have to do to for Valentine's Day to avoid us breaking up.
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I want you or someone else on this dating site to be my Valentine.
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I'm so happy you found someone to disappoint you this Valentine's Day.
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Prepare yourself for the most romantic Valentine's Day that Groupon has to offer.
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I hope no one is secretly criticizing my appearance as harshly as I'm criticizing theirs.
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I hope you get as much action on your birthday as your Facebook page does.
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I get a runner's high on the way to the fridge.
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36 things you've always wanted to say on Facebook.
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I'm not sure you should call it a lunch meeting if there won't be lunch.
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Unlike the Chili Peppers' guitar playing at the Super Bowl, my love for you is real.
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Seeing Sochi bathrooms has given me a new appreciation for the wall separating me from your horrifying workplace dumps.
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May our Olympians win medals as gold as the tap water in Sochi.
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Your 1:02 minute Facebook movie was one minute too long to hold my attention.
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I don't even want to watch my own Facebook movie.
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Happy 10th anniversary of not creating Facebook to the Winklevoss twins.
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Sorry your ex played such a prominent role in your Facebook movie.
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If Autocorrect Replaced Everything You Type With Everything You Really Mean
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