Family's chicken lays enormous egg with mind-bending surprise inside.

December 30, 2015, 10:40 am

≫ Next: Target makes it right after 9-year-old opens PS4 box and gets an obscene surprise.

≪ Previous: This trippy color-changing cake is much better than The Dress because you can eat it.

$

0

0

Emma Postlethwaite, a woman with the most English-sounding name since Benedict Cumberbatch, posted a video to YouTube earlier this month in which she cracks open an egg from one of her chickens. If you've ever kept hens, you know that they don't always lay perfect, uniform ovals. Sometimes some weird stuff comes out. In this case, it's one really huge egg—huge enough that it will leave you wondering if the chicken is okay...down there. But what a magical surprise is waiting inside!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3A6RCFg8hk8

Wow. An egg inside an egg! It's like Eggception. Whatever that chicken went through to birth this thing, it was worth it.

---

Target makes it right after 9-year-old opens PS4 box and gets an obscene surprise.

December 30, 2015, 11:10 am

≫ Next: Thousands of people were tricked into sharing this picture of a "burned" dog.

≪ Previous: Family's chicken lays enormous egg with mind-bending surprise inside.

$

0

0

Nine-year-old Scott Lundy was thrilled to unwrap and open a PlayStation 4 box on Christmas Eve, except instead of the console in the box, he found a wooden block with a dick drawn on it. This came as a great surprise to his father and stepmom, as the gift was purchased at a local Target. It's almost as shocking as the time porn blared loudly over the intercom at a Target. But that's not all! The following message was also written on the block:

From cock and balls with love.

Wow. This may have been the work of scam artists who returned a block of wood with the same weight and size dimensions as an actual PS4. Which makes way more sense than an actual Grinch trying to ruin Christmas morning for some unsuspecting kid.

https://twitter.com/fox25news/status/680956143938715648

It is really, really unfortunate that young Scott was so excited about the PS4 before he opened the box. His father, Brian Lundy, described what Scott joyously screamed moments before the gift was ruined:

This is the best present ever this is the best Christmas Eve!

Target apologized to the Lundy family for the regrettable mishap, of course, and they received a new actual PS4 along with a $100 gift card and a free game. It will likely be their most memorable Christmas on record. As for the wooden block, it did what anyone does after waking up on the floor of a stranger's home with a dick drawn on it: called a taxi to go home.

Thousands of people were tricked into sharing this picture of a "burned" dog.

December 30, 2015, 12:10 pm

≫ Next: Girl demonstrates how not to take your first shot in front of your mom.

≪ Previous: Target makes it right after 9-year-old opens PS4 box and gets an obscene surprise.

$

0

0

In what may be the funniest fake viral post of 2015 (and that includes the one where Richard Gere posed as a homeless guy), someone named Stephen Roseman posted a picture to Facebook a couple of days before Christmas of a "burned" dog. It was captioned: "This poor dog was badly burned and disfigured trying to save his family from a house fire. One like = one prayer One share = ten prayers."

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=152173565149643&set=a.133529030347430.1073741829.100010710018154&type=3&theater

People really came through, because this picture has now been shared over 100,000 times. Which is ridiculous, because it's obviously a piece of lunch meat draped over a very patient puppy's face. The comments on this picture are pretty much a nightmare, between all the angry people who were stupid enough to pray for Ham Dog, the ones who weren't fooled but are definitely offended, and the trolling of Roseman and his meme-loving friends.

Obviously this dog with ham on his face is hilarious, but one thing is also clear: Stephen Roseman is riding this viral train to Assholeville and everybody better get out of his way!

Girl demonstrates how not to take your first shot in front of your mom.

December 30, 2015, 1:10 pm

≫ Next: Reckless raccoon performs daring daylight donut robbery while gawkers giggle.

≪ Previous: Thousands of people were tricked into sharing this picture of a "burned" dog.

$

0

0

Instagram user Chelseaelayne shared a video from what appears to be a family Christmas party of a young woman taking her first shot. The suspense was also heightened because she was taking a shot of tequila, which should be painful for an amateur. Either way, the entire party was watching her, including her mom, whose reaction following the shot is the priceless stuff memes are made of:

https://www.instagram.com/p/_vTrBksnPi/?taken-by=chelseaelayne

That's one suspicious mom, and one unconvincing daughter. She could have at least pretended to wince or gag and save herself some trouble. While she drinks with the best of them, she can't act to save her life.

Thankfully, if her mom starts grilling her with questions, she can reference scientific research about how drinking like a pro doesn't necessarily mean she has a problem.

Reckless raccoon performs daring daylight donut robbery while gawkers giggle.

December 30, 2015, 1:30 pm

≫ Next: Old Navy is in hot water for a bizarre t-shirt that discourages young artists. Very young.

≪ Previous: Girl demonstrates how not to take your first shot in front of your mom.

$

0

0

2015 was a great year for animals with poor diets. There was Bagel Pigeon, and of course who could forget Pizza Rat? Today a new, more adorable hero emerged from the animal kingdom: Donut Raccoon. Time magazine posted this video on their site of a hungry raccoon popping out of the ceiling and reaching down with his paws for a delicious donut. The folks witnessing this robbery first-hand giggled and squealed like a group of 12-year-olds at a Bieber concert. "This is incredible," one guy says, and he's right. Catch the furry thief in action here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1MkBNoCnfc

Guess he's waiting to start his diet on January 1st like everyone else.

Old Navy is in hot water for a bizarre t-shirt that discourages young artists. Very young.

December 30, 2015, 1:50 pm

≫ Next: This couple has a squirrel in their Christmas tree and they're happy about it.

≪ Previous: Reckless raccoon performs daring daylight donut robbery while gawkers giggle.

$

0

0

Cheap pants supplier Old Navy is taking those smug, useless artists down a notch by selling shirts for kids that say, "Young Aspiring Artist Astronaut" or "Young Aspiring Artist President."And why the hell shouldn't they? Yes, an "artist" or designer probably made this shirt, but screw them and the hundreds of thousands of other people who make money or take enjoyment from art.

https://twitter.com/petershankman/status/681954574668660737?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

No one knows why the execs at Old Navy are taking this weird stance against childhood creativity instead of making, for example, a "Young Aspiring Murderer Friend" shirt, but Twitter sure is fired up about it. People are getting mad and also stating the obvious: statistically you are far more likely to be employed as an artist than as an astronaut or president.

https://twitter.com/reesabobeesa/status/682255757841059841https://twitter.com/AcademyUGallery/status/682267518669615104https://twitter.com/ArtboyDesign/status/682007595003985920?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfwhttps://twitter.com/BlairJCampbell/status/682072609798897664?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfwhttps://twitter.com/malindamarkland/status/682211572991848449?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfwhttps://twitter.com/artsology/status/681982095166697472?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfwhttps://twitter.com/HESherman/status/682236948052852736?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

Great adjustments, guys. That's what happens when you piss off creative people.

This couple has a squirrel in their Christmas tree and they're happy about it.

December 30, 2015, 2:40 pm

≫ Next: New Year's

≪ Previous: Old Navy is in hot water for a bizarre t-shirt that discourages young artists. Very young.

$

0

0

When you hear about a squirrel in a Christmas tree, you probably think of that famous scene in Christmas Vacation, but for one family, it's no joke. A Reddit user named Chris told The Dodo that he and his wife rescued a baby squirrel after they found it injured and twitching by the side of road in the rain. The squirrel, which they named Mitten, is doing much better now thanks to the caring couple. His favorite place to chill in their house is—you guessed it—the Christmas tree.

View post on imgur.com

View post on imgur.com

Chris says Mitten won't be able to be released back into the wild, but that they're working on building him something else to play on when the tree gets taken down. Until then they have a lot of this to look forward to:

https://youtu.be/1wKcgW2TSO8

New Year's

December 30, 2015, 5:00 pm

≫ Next: Nothing new.

≪ Previous: This couple has a squirrel in their Christmas tree and they're happy about it.

$

0

0

---

Nothing new.

December 31, 2015, 5:00 am

≫ Next: Beat the crowds.

≪ Previous: New Year's

$

0

0

Beat the crowds.

December 31, 2015, 7:00 am

≫ Next: Out with the old.

≪ Previous: Nothing new.

$

0

0

Out with the old.

December 31, 2015, 7:30 am

≫ Next: New Year's

≪ Previous: Beat the crowds.

$

0

0

New Year's

December 31, 2015, 7:31 am

≫ Next: Last chance.

≪ Previous: Out with the old.

$

0

0

Last chance.

December 31, 2015, 7:31 am

≫ Next: Encouragement

≪ Previous: New Year's

$

0

0

Encouragement

January 1, 2016, 9:00 am

≫ Next: Article 1

≪ Previous: Last chance.

$

0

0

Article 1

January 1, 2016, 10:00 am

≫ Next: The top 42 tweets of the week (and 2016 so far), as picked by someone who spends way too much time on Twitter.

≪ Previous: Encouragement

$

0

0

---

The top 42 tweets of the week (and 2016 so far), as picked by someone who spends way too much time on Twitter.

January 1, 2016, 11:50 am

≫ Next: New Year's

≪ Previous: Article 1

$

0

0

Happy New Year! FYI, Advil-and-water is the only proven hangover cure. But drink twice as much water as you want, that's the key. 2015's crazy ass went out with a bang. Dogs wearing pants were a hot topic—

https://twitter.com/jaredbkeller/status/681677529464356864

—Trump said more crazy stuff, chicken remained delicious, and we cautiously welcomed 2016 into our lives. Read all about it in the Top 42 Tweets Of The Week!

1.

https://twitter.com/nedroid/status/682797131724242946

2.

https://twitter.com/desusnice/status/682705117494308864

3.

https://twitter.com/JonAcuff/status/682789071085809664

4.

https://twitter.com/KatTimpf/status/682821142478979072

5.

https://twitter.com/badbanana/status/682814723281125378

6.

https://twitter.com/TheJamieLee/status/682803217940365312

7.

http://twitter.com/trouteyes/status/682517183684022273

8.

https://twitter.com/amydillon/status/682053669446107137

9.

https://twitter.com/brendohare/status/681302576491577344

10.

https://twitter.com/lazerdoov/status/681982496083283968

11.

https://twitter.com/Bobbyslow/status/682399652994510848

12.

https://twitter.com/nickmullen/status/681135260537647105

13.

https://twitter.com/godValDon/status/681351935870562304

14.

https://twitter.com/martynhett/status/682198446229598208

15.

https://twitter.com/KarenKilgariff/status/682452331527561218

16.

https://twitter.com/sixthformpoet/status/682259915126239234

17.

https://twitter.com/LizHackett/status/680874542974173184

18.

https://twitter.com/SleazySli/status/682386703571664896

19.

https://twitter.com/neshathewicked/status/682096355284619264

20.

https://twitter.com/EveryTweet_Ever/status/682605170870628356

21.

https://twitter.com/mynameisntdave/status/682598457899614208

22.

https://twitter.com/lynnbixenspan/status/681952059285962752

23.

https://twitter.com/KLobstar/status/682091196261494785

24.

https://twitter.com/sageboggs/status/681520244884697089

25.

https://twitter.com/RealTomHankz/status/682357506660630529

26.

https://twitter.com/Hank_Thompson/status/682626641252728833

27.

https://twitter.com/nurserycrimes/status/681305548403400704

28.

https://twitter.com/philyuck/status/682050555376611328

29.

https://twitter.com/JohnFugelsang/status/681910956369272832

30.

https://twitter.com/figgled/status/682096010672275456

31.

https://twitter.com/tomabrady/status/682266316980535296

32.

https://twitter.com/MazMHussain/status/681901718779609088

33.

https://twitter.com/filthyson/status/681935872388907010

34.

https://twitter.com/cox_tom/status/681413222730194944

35.

http://twitter.com/1followernodad/status/682060852162215936

36.

https://twitter.com/cwhudson/status/674336358337536000

37.

http://twitter.com/GUBLERNATION/status/681675897020137472

38.

http://twitter.com/WhatSamJustSaid/status/682773809162653696

39.

https://twitter.com/CakeThrottle/status/682362386150457346

40.

https://twitter.com/boring_as_heck/status/682818101541351425

41.

https://twitter.com/NickBossRoss/status/682844325546475520

42.

https://twitter.com/JaiBrooks1/status/682816857158467584

New Year's

January 2, 2016, 5:00 am

≫ Next: Trump's newest critic is a skywriting plane leaving messages during a football parade.

≪ Previous: The top 42 tweets of the week (and 2016 so far), as picked by someone who spends way too much time on Twitter.

$

0

0

Trump's newest critic is a skywriting plane leaving messages during a football parade.

January 2, 2016, 7:23 am

≫ Next: Someone created a very racist dating website in a very white state.

≪ Previous: New Year's

$

0

0

A skywriting plane left less than flattering messages for Donald Trump at the Rose Parade in Pasadena, California. The parade is an annual tradition held for the Rose Bowl. The messages were likely left for visiting fans of the Iowa Hawkeyes, as they played in the Rose Bowl and the Iowa caucus will be held on Feb. 1. Trump has earned himself so much negative attention based on remarks this year that it warranted a list of top celebrity takedowns of the GOP presidential candidate. Here are the smoke messages left in skywriting during the parade:

https://twitter.com/palewire/status/682986043839127552https://twitter.com/drz/status/682986517157908480https://twitter.com/dccendejas/status/682987017790078977

In an age where emails and social media dominate campaigning and fundraising, it's quite amusing to see a political message left in smoke behind an airplane. The only way to top it would have been to drop flyers from a blimp.

Someone created a very racist dating website in a very white state.

January 2, 2016, 9:19 am

≫ Next: 2016 will be the Year of the Monkey, and this cat is ready for it.

≪ Previous: Trump's newest critic is a skywriting plane leaving messages during a football parade.

$

0

0

A billboard in Utah for a dating site catering exclusively to white people is catching attention. The name of the site, "Where White People Meet," pretty much says it all. For a fee of $4, anyone over the age of 18 can join. Interestingly, the site prohibits same-sex dating searches, but searches for polygamy are acceptable.

With a focus on white people, they are supposedly bringing new innovation to specialty dating sites. There are dating sites for farmers, and people of specific religions. To be certain, online dating can be scary, as Tinder users have shared their worst nightmares of going on dates with weirdos. Not surprisingly, not one of those stories involved someone being upset about someone misrepresenting their race in their profile. Here's the billboard:

https://twitter.com/sltrib/status/682706904452210688

The funniest part about this dating site is that it is based in Utah and advertises in Utah, which according to the latest data from the United States Census Bureau, is a state with a population that is 91.4% white. So basically this would be like starting a dating site in Boston called "Where Red Sox Fans Meet." Here's the site's explanation for its existence:

I am sure some of you are wondering about the concept and need for a dating website titled "Where White People Meet.Com." Our answer to that would be why not? There are various dating websites that promote and cater to just about every origin, race, religion and lifestyle out there. So again, why not "Where White People Meet.Com" 

The census data pretty much answers the question "why not?" Additionally, that description was written at about a fifth grade reading level. The true question for the site is whether they can solicit enough $4 subscriptions to pay for that billboard before the business fails.

2016 will be the Year of the Monkey, and this cat is ready for it.

January 2, 2016, 10:10 am

≫ Next: Dog gets impossibly stuck in a couch for a very dog-like reason.

≪ Previous: Someone created a very racist dating website in a very white state.

$

0

0

2016 will be the year of the monkey in the Chinese zodiac calendar, so now there's a video of a cat wearing a monkey costume. While there are no shortage of cute videos with actual monkeys, a video of a cat dressed as a monkey is gives it the magic the Internet so lovingly craves. This is perhaps the most docile cat ever recorded in a costume. It's an even better sport than the cat dressed as a pirate for Halloween. It's so chill it seems it could be dressed in any outfit:

https://youtu.be/YtEhX7mhDJc

It certainly takes much more time to eat a banana than a monkey. Next year this lucky creature gets to wear a rooster costume for Chinese New Year, and its owner is going to have a difficult time getting it to strut and cluck.