Alec Baldwin's Love Ride is not a new a Disney World roller coaster, but it is a segment on TruTV's Rachel Dratch's Late Night Snack. In the segment, the actor dispenses sage love advice to a random couple in a limo. Jim Gaffigan tags along in this edition, serving as the limo driver before hopping in the backseat to munch on some pretzels and lead an impromptu therapy session as Baldwin's intern/love advisor.
Alec Baldwin and his intern Jim Gaffigan gave love advice to a random teen couple.
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The magical moment this diver smooches his weird-looking fish friend will make you want a blobby aquatic pal of your own.
Japanese diver Hiroyuki Arakawa has been taking care of a sacred Shinto shrine under Tateyama Bay (and acting as a guide for other divers who want to visit it) for over 20 years. And in the process, he's made friends with a lot of the marine life, especially one particularly amiable fish named Yoriko.
The fish, an Asian sheepshead wrasse, greets Arakawa as he goes about his work, and Arawaka removes his apparatus and knocks the fish a real sweet kiss right on its weird head hump.
Do fish have feelings? No one's sure. Maybe Yoriko's just visiting the shrine for his own religious reasons. But after 25 years, the recognition and familiarity seem to be there on the fish's part. Certain species of wrasse can reportedly live over 30 years. So Arakawa's got just about 5 more years to try to get to second base with the fish. Or at least star in their own Disney movie.
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Article 32
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Viral instagrammer shows just how much effort it takes to get Insta-famous. Way too much.
Photographer Murad Osmann became Instagram-famous when he started taking his #FollowMeTo photos. The series features Murad holding his wife Natalia Zakharova’s hand all around the globe. Don't worry, the PDA is mild. But there is a lot of hand-holding in the photos. A lot.
So much, actually, you might think the couple have their palms literally glued together. Fortunately, that's not the case. Last Friday, Murad uploaded a video on YouTube for a behind-the-scenes look at the how they create their gorgeous photos. In the video, you can see Natalia wearing a slew of Indian outfits that nicely compliment each backdrop.
From Jaipur to New Delhi, the clip also shows you a handful of picturesque locations in India. Take a look:
According to his Instagram account, Murad started the series in Barcelona, Spain and the series soon became viral—he currently has over 3.9 million followers. Check out their other lovely travel photos, here.
Apparently, consistency is key if you ever want to be Instagram-famous. Whether you're clutching your significant other's hand in a plethora of photos or taking nude selfies like there's no tomorrow, virality comes to those who are consistent.
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Little girl writes letter to police suggesting they get a 'police cat.' They're actually gonna do it.
Eliza Adamson-Hopper, friend of the feline species, reached out to Chief Constable Mike Barton in Durham, England with a burning question: why are there no police cats? As the BBC reported, Chief Barton not only took the time to respond to five-year-old Eliza, he also drew her a picture.
Eliza's parents aided her in typing out her argumentative essay in favor of police cats.
Dear Chief Constable Barton,
My name is Eliza and I am 5 years old.
I was talking to my dad about police dogs and I asked him if you had police cats as well—he told me that he didn't think there were any police cats but I said that I think they would be good.
A police cat would be good as they have good ears and can listen out for danger.
Cats are good at finding their way home and could show policemen the way.
Cats are good at climbing trees and hunting and could rescue people that are stuck.
My dog is friends with my cat and I think a police cat would be friends with your police dogs.
Please will you think about getting police cats?
Thank you
She does have a good point about cats' hearing abilities. The rest is a little questionable. Nonetheless, Chief Barton kindly answered her.
Dear Eliza,
Thank you for your letter suggesting the police should use cats as well as police dogs.
I am going to ask my inspector who is in charge of police dogs to think about your good idea.
I've always liked cats and I've drawn my cat Joey on the back of the letter (I'm not a very good drawer though).
Thank you,
Mike Barton
Chief Constable
Meet Joey, the Chief Constable's cat.
Hopefully Chief Barton is not the sketch artist in Durham.
Now, thanks to Eliza's letter, the Durham police are actually considering adding a cat to the force. "I can confirm the force is looking into recruiting what we believe to be the first UK police cat," Inspector Richie Allen said. "Their duties and responsibilities have not yet been agreed but if nothing else they will become the force mascot."
"Of course, if it smells a rat we'll expect it to catch it," Allen added. Nothing less should be expected from a police cat.
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Elizabeth Warren says what she really thinks about Donald Trump and it's spectacular to behold.
Elizabeth Warren, every Democrat's dream candidate for 2020, visited Late Show on Wednesday night and shared how she really feels about 2016. Warren went off on Donald Trump, delivering such well-crafted burns as, "Donald Trump is looking out for exactly one guy... and that guy's name is Donald Trump."
Her best line came towards her closer:
When the economy is in this type of trouble, calling Donald Trump for help is like if your house is on fire, calling an arsonist to come help out.
That one, in particular, is hot fire.
Watch the full interview here:
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9-year-old Suri Cruise explains why she fired her music teacher like a mature adult going through a break-up.
Suri Cruise, daughter of Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise, reportedly made an interesting remark about her guitar teacher following a Broadway show in New York on Tuesday. The nine-year-old, who like many famous kids looks a whole bunch like her parents, was answering a question from the star of "School of Rock: The Musical."
While backstage, actor Alex Brightman reportedly asked Suri if she played an instrument. Suri answered that she “used to play the guitar,” but parted ways with her teacher. She took the high road, saying that her teacher was "a very nice person," but just wasn't a good fit. Almost like the excuse you would use in a break-up.
To be certain, it's unlikely Suri actually had that tough conversation. It was probably a personal assistant who told the guitar teacher. Then they both had to knowingly look at each other, acknowledging that their careers revolve around working with celebrity children.
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Article 27
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Try watching Demi Lovato and Nick Jonas perform at a children's hospital without weeping. Just try.
Nick Jonas and Demi Lovato's music became bearable, even slightly touching, during their recent trip to Children's Hospital Los Angeles. The pair's surprise visit included a private concert and a casual hangout with the kids as part of #MakeMarchMatter, a campaign meant to raise awareness for children's health.
The children weren't the only ones who enjoyed Jonas and Lovato's visit.
Warm your heart even more with this video of a robot delivering a pizza to one of the same hospital's patients a couple of weeks ago.
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5 pregnancy pranks that will make you happy you're not getting laid.
There's really nothing funny about pranking your partner about pregnancy. Joking about something as serious as bringing a new life into the world, and then yelling "Psych! Got you!" after your partner has had a few minutes to process the news, probably doesn't create a lot of trust in a relationship. Your partner is either going to be wildly happy and then totally let down, or about to throw him or herself into oncoming traffic and then about to throw you into traffic.
Here are a few people who used a fake positive pregnancy test to fool their significant others into believing either the best or worst news, depending on perspective.
1. The quickie
She has maybe the sweetest boyfriend ever. And at least she lets him off the hook fast.
"It's not funny."
"It's kind of hilarious."
2. The long con
Poor Grant. He doesn't even have a job yet! She strings him along for way too long, before finally admitting the pregnancy test is fake.
"So there are no babies?"
"Grant, I bought this online."
3. The meltdown
He's very happy she's not actually pregnant, but less happy about the fact she probably took about 10 years off his life with her prank.
4. The pranker becomes the prankee
It's a tale as old as time itself—woman tells man she's pregnant, man freaks out because he's sterile and knows it can't be his, so woman must be cheating. Except in this case, they're both lying. What a confusing relationship.
5. The ol' switcheroo
This one's a little different—the husband bought the fake pregnancy test, and his wife took it and thought she was pregnant. And couldn't stop repeating, "What are we gonna do?" ("You're excited? We live with your mom!") The husband really commits to this prank, even going as far as letting his wife call her mom with the news, before telling her he gave her a fake pregnancy test.
But all's well that ends well:
"I hate you."
"I love you, too, baby."
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21 porn stars were asked to describe the ideal penis and couldn't come to a consensus. It's probably not yours.
Wood Rocket, a YouTube channel and website dedicated to getting to know porn stars outside of their day job, asked a ton of the business's finest actresses to describe their ideal penis. The penis drawings are censored because YouTube is still living like it's 2007, so you'll just have to imagine the actresses' dream junk or attempt to follow the bizarre hand gestures they use to outline the shape of the elusive, ideal penis.
The results are all over the place, proving that it's not penis size or girth or curve that counts, but who's looking at the penis that makes the biggest difference. Either way, having a sizable, girthy, and curvy member will definitely land you a gig doing porn, which, in this economy, is never a bad backup to have.
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Article 23
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Dr. Pimple Popper celebrates a million YouTube subscribers by compiling all her most disgusting pops.
Dermatologist Dr. Sandra Lee, a.k.a. Dr. Pimple Popper, just reached one million subscribers on her YouTube channel, and as a thank you to all her fans, she's put together a 20 minute video of some of her most disgusting (and yet deeply satisfying) extractions. The video is called "50 Shades of Dr. Pimple Popper," a reference to the rise of online "pimple porn." The video is 20 full minutes of nastiness shooting out of humans' bodies like silly string under the power of her expertly wielded extractor (which, by the way, you can purchase).
Blackheads are obliterated. Pimples become tiny active volcanoes. Cysts are cut open and "expressed," like tiny vaginas giving birth to wee pus babies.
Really good stuff, if that's your thing. Twenty minutes of vomit-inducing, torturous awfulness if it's not. Have at it, weirdos.
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Ashton Kutcher tells the story of when he punk'd Drake so hard, they couldn't air it.
It must be 2003 all over again, because That 70's Show co-stars Ashton Kutcher and Danny Masterson sat down to talk about Punk'd on The Late Late Show with James Cordon. Apparently there's tons of unaired footage from Punk'd that viewers never got to see because the stars being pranked didn't want to be humiliated on television. Aw, man.
Don't remember Punk'd? It was a prank show hosted by Kutcher that made celebrities think they were in a really scary situation for a few minutes before Kutcher popped out and got in their face yelling "You've been punk'd!!" In the video below, Kutcher talks about "punking" Drake so hard that he retreated into the fetal position.
Kutcher pranked tons of other celebrities over the five years he hosted the show, including Justin Timberlake, Beyonce, and Kanye West. Masterson also said of Kutcher, "Don't ever actually piss him off because the footage that doesn't make it on is incriminating to say the least."
Could it be any more incriminating than this video, though?
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The hydraulic press people have an easy recipe for the messiest fruit salad you'll ever make.
Crushing stuff is even more fun if you get to eat the crushed stuff afterwards. Now, the people who smashed an alarm clock and tested the myth about paper not folding more the seven times are back with their hydraulic press and a bunch of fruit, this time to create an edible arrangement of destructive grandeur. Warning: do not let any produce you may have at home watch this video; it is simply too violent for another fruit to see.
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Chris Christie called a sports radio show to defend how he eats M&Ms, obviously.
Chris Christie called into a sports radio show on Wednesday to explain why it appeared he was pouring a bag of M&Ms into a larger box of M&Ms at a basketball game last week. Naturally, the picture looked bad for a guy that takes lots of cracks about his weight.
So, Christie called into Boomer & Carton, a New York sports radio show to explain the pic in question:
While the pic looks damning and gluttonous, Christie explained on the show that at some arenas, a box of M&Ms contains a bag of M&Ms inside it:
You get the box, you open the box, there’s a bag inside the box, why they do it that way I have no idea, but you open the up the bag, you pour the bag into the box so it’s easier to hold.
It's true that a box is easier to hold than a bag. Christie said he had no idea why they package it like that, and he praised the parent company (Mars), because their chocolate business is headquartered in New Jersey.
Sadly, the reason why they put the bag inside the box might be that it appears you're getting more candy (full box), but in reality you're getting a smaller bag. But since he's still Governor of New Jersey, he can't say anything bad about a prominent New Jersey business. The chocolate industry has powerful friends, and they are not to be crossed.
Here's a video of the hosts with the audio of the full interview:
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Beer company 'Order of Yoni' wants to make beer out of vagina. No, that's not a joke. Unless of course it is.
Unless it's an April Fool's Day joke, a company called The Order of Yoni is trying to crowdfund a beer brewed from the juices of one model's lucky vagina. Lucky because she could make millions, not because the words "lactic acid bacteria"—the crucial ingredient—will be forever associated with her private parts.
You have questions, of course. Because you're only human. Not a soulless corporation trying to harvest "sour ale" from a model's vagina.
The company's IndieGogo page insists that with 150,000 euro, they can brew six batches of approximately 16,600 beers each. "Using hi-tech of microbiology, we isolate, examine and prepare lactic acid bacteria from [the] vagina of a unique woman."
Safety's a top concern, and they assure anyone reckless enough to drink their beer that they have "procedures of isolation and preparation [to] prevent other bacteria and viruses from surviving" the brewing process.
The company's about page almost makes their pursuit sound poetic, or at least soft-core…
Imagine [the] woman of your dreams, your object of desire. Her charm, her sensuality, her passion… Try her taste, feel her smell, hear her voice… Imagine her massaging you passionately and whispering into your ear everything you want.
…before they promptly ruin that gentle plea with this blunt conclusion: "The secret of the beer lies in her vagina."
So far, the Order of Yoni (reportedly a Sanscrit word for "vagina"), has only raised €279 of their €150,000 goal.
If you have some sick desire to learn more, watch the company's YouTube video. In it, you can hear a lot of the narrator's mouth sounds. Because everything associated with this idea is creepy.
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Article 17
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California man is so tired of people having sex in the park by his house, he films them. Wait, what?
A dude from Sacramento, California was so frustrated at people who kept having sex at the park outside his house, he decided to do something about it. The man, simply known as Marty, apparently decided to place a bunch of surveillance cameras on a light pole to catch these folks doing their dirty work.
In a video interview with Inside Edition posted this Thursday, Marty said, “I have seen and recorded probably 50 some sex events.” Not only has Marty encountered people having sex on his CCTV cameras, but also the usual teenage debauchery: a guy with a doobie and teens drinking.
“I video everything,” he said. “We either offer it to the police to use as evidence against them or we put it up on YouTube.”
Marty has his fair share of supporters and haters alike. According to Yahoo News, his neighbors (as well as the sheriff’s department) allegedly love the free police work Marty provides. On the other hand, several Internet users don’t think it's so stellar. A comment on the above video says, "This guy is secretly a peeping tom."
“People think I’m shaming them but we're not," says Marty in his defense. "It was originally started for just neighborhood watch.”
The sergeant of the Sacramento Sheriff's Department said in the video: “If we get there and that crime is no longer happening and he says he's seen as a witness and provides us with the video, it just strengthens his case.”
Hopefully no one was having alien sex or anything weird like that, right Kimye?
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Article 15
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