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Animator perfectly captures the worst thing about browsing the Internet on your phone.

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If you're a person who surfs the Internet on your phone—which you're probably doing right now—you've encountered the terrible modern plague of the Suddenly Moving Phone Screen. In fact, it will probably happen if you scroll down on this page (sorry, even filthy bloggers have to eat). YouTube animator plontulublalulu addressed this exquisite agony in this understated short film that you will now think about every time it happens to you:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3tUmh8OfAiY

Related: Start your year off right by deleting all the pre-loaded apps you hate from your phone.


Some sicko compiled 10 of the saddest on-screen deaths into one video so you can have a good cry.

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Redditor jjzook was browsing online when he came across a thread of people discussing the saddest deaths in fiction. Naturally, jjzook decided to spread that heartbreak to as many people as possible by creating a video with 10 soul-crushing deaths from TV and movies. Although not as extensive as the saddest moments in TV history, this video has a good chance of making you pretend you aren't crying.

SPOILER ALERT: This video is almost entirely spoilers. Even the thumbnail image on the video is a Star Wars spoiler. Seriously, it's a montage of fictional deaths. If you want to avoid being spoiled or want to skip a particularly brutal childhood memory, jjzook helpfully wrote down the clip order with timecodes:

The List:

Up 0:07
Star Wars: Episode VII 1:13
Game of Thrones, Season 5 1:50
Harry Potter (Deathly Hallows pt 2) 2:56
Lord of the Rings (FOTR) 4:57
Where the Red Fern Grows 7:04
The Land Before Time 8:45
The Lion King 10:33
The Champ 12:23
The Shawshank Redemption 14:26

OK, here ya go: cry your eyes out.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysGyWZR75aQ

Related: 15 of the most heartbreaking moments in TV history, according to sobbing Internet users.

Subway performers take the classic standard 'Slow Boat To China' and turn it into the hottest whistling solos of 2016.

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This is a video of two musicians—Damon Hankoff on bass and Vilray Bolles on guitar and vocals—performing the crooner classic "Slow Boat To China" and making whistling great again. They're also a good reminder that great musicians can be found on the streets around you. As the person who caught this on camera writes, 

I've been living in NYC for nearly a decade and these are two of the best buskers I've ever seen. Not only is this guys voice butter but they're both amazing whistlers! My only regret is that I started filming halfway through the song. 

This was shot in the Metropolitan/Lorimer station of the G train in Brooklyn, which is pertinent only because the G train makes you wait forever, but it's likely these subway riders wished they could have stayed longer.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfQ94EXIpTc

Related: Korean tourist politely asks Italian street musicians if he can join them, absolutely kills it.

Move over, everything-else-that-accidentally-looks-like-boobs. These lights really look like boobs.

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There have been other things that unintentionally looked like boobs: cakes, produce, elbows, children's drawings, you name it. None of it comes close to the optical illusion caused by the shadows cast on the ceiling from these two lights in this picture shared by captainhowdy27. These are the most boob-looking things. Specifically, boobs with fun tassles hanging off them. 

All hail the new accidental boob champion.

Related: People who really should've checked the background of their pics before putting them online.

Workplace

Kenan Thompson's Al Sharpton talks to the real Al Sharpton about candidates' 'Black Approval Ratings' on 'SNL.'

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There's nothing like a good ol' SNL sneaker-upper, when a real celebrity gets to meet the comedian that plays them, and talk about themselves in the third person. Kenan Thompson's Al Sharpton welcomed the real Al Sharpton (who was playing a character that wasn't Al Sharpton) to Politics Nation with Al Sharpton (how many times can one say Al Sharpton in a single sentence?). The two Als run through candidates' "Black Approval Ratings," looking at their standings in the black community. Let's just say that Trump's negative attitude leads to a negative number. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0LsKtCqf8gI

Hillary Clinton hearts New York, tries to reverse her losing streak in the 'SNL' cold open.

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Hillary Clinton may have lost a state or two—or seven—in the recent primaries and caucuses, but she's turning her attention to the "Fat Apple," where she hopes to become the new Comeback Kid. Watch as Hillary attempts to show that she is just like all New Yorkers: nuts for nuts, in a hurry to get to work, and hating it "when a slow old Jew gets in [her] way." 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZwQkBfBs958

Hillary definitely has a few more things in common with all New Yorkers: she's constantly asking for money, and ruthlessly pursuing her dreams even if half the country doesn't like what she's selling.

Guy tricks his friend into thinking he's an Uber driver in the kind of prank that actually makes you happy.

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This is what pranks should look like: Connor Nolte's good friend Ramiro has relocated to Brazil, but is coming back to finish up his visa process—so Connor teams up with another friend, Jesse, to pick up Ramiro from the airport. But, you see, when Jesse "calls an Uber," it won't be an Uber. It'll be Connor! But! They'll try to make Ramiro think it's just a random Uber driver for as long as possible. When the reveal does finally come, the result is an outpouring of actual happiness that will make you wish you had friends like these. No one gets hurt, or sexually harassed, or embarrassed. The point of the prank is not to get away with being horrible people—it's to make your friends happy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sizJLN5EjOI

Related: ‘Found Your Phone In An Uber’ is the accidental dance jam hit of 2016.


Kate McKinnon on 'SNL' is everyone's mom trying to sum up 'The People v. OJ Simpson.'

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Colin Jost introduced Kate McKinnon as "somebody's mom," but really, she was everyone's mom, doing her best to recap The People v. OJ SimpsonBetween bites of Brussels Sprouts, mom tried to explain the show's complicated court proceedings, in which "curly head got really mad at Black Mr. Clean" and "skunk hair from Friends kept bringing up the Jews." McKinnon and this character fit like a glove.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SMzCPBNsxk0

Russell Crowe brings an Oscar-worthy intensity to playing a 'student of genitals' on 'SNL.'

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Russell Crowe brought his Oscar-winning intensity to playing a ponytailed German professor on a dating show, who promises to mount a "subtle yet focused campaign" on Cecily Strong's genitals. You can't help but be entertained. In his most theatrical performance since Les Miserables, Crowe nails the role of Benedict, a man who "knows his way around a woman's body" thanks to growing up surrounded by old ladies.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=szLej6PgQoY

It's equal parts "Hahaha" and "Ew." 

He probably taught you about genitals in Gladiator, too.

Hilarious parody account photoshops classic young adult novel covers with vastly improved titles.

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Paperback Paradise is a new popular Twitter account and Tumblr with a very simple and hilarious premise: they photoshop the covers of young adult novels with funny new titles based on the cover art. None of it requires knowing anything about the source material.

https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/708381447032217601

Whether or not you know what Sweet Valley High is (or Sweet Valley Twins, or Sweet Valley Kids—seriously, there's a lot of drama in this Sweet Valley place), it will be hard to ever imagine a different title on that cover. That goes double for this spinoff of the Wrinkle In Time series, in which Meg Murry's dull, non-magical brothers accidentally end up lusting after Noah's daughter in Biblical times. I actually liked that book, but this version is way better:

https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/717748045069180928

Here are some more of Paperback Paradise's greatest hits to ruin your childhood memories:

https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/713085575910154240https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/709076016178667520https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/710861909935783937https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/712310942181122048https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/714950152826388480https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/708381447032217601https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/710203403029389313https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/711241128251555840https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/710595317574414336https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/711590017928286208https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/711939361089060866https://twitter.com/paprbckparadise/status/710148236279828481

Related: Guy entertains people-watchers on the subway by 'reading' filthy and hilarious fake books.

Mike O'Brien stars in an Oprah biopic on 'SNL,' which goes better than you'd expect.

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What's the secret to being a lanky white guy playing the most influential (and richest) African-American woman in television history? If this SNL sketch from April 9 starring Mike O'Brien is any indication, the answer is to not try to act black, or like a woman, or even like Oprah. Just hang out and be a white guy who also happens to be Oprah. Don't be weird about it. Just be yourself—because isn't that what Oprah taught us? This could have gone wrong in so many ways, but instead it's oddly charming and delightful.

http://www.hulu.com/watch/927984

Related: Kate McKinnon on 'SNL' is everyone's mom trying to sum up 'The People v. OJ Simpson.'

Mark Hamill wished Daisy Ridley a happy birthday with this photo of them starting Jedi training.

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On April 10, some guy on Twitter named Mark Hamill (or Mark Hamilton) wished a lady named Daisy Ridley a happy birthday, and tweet has gone viral as if it were propelled by some sort of Force. It was like a billion voices cried out and said "cool, I like those people." Now witness the firepower of this fully armed and operational tweet:

https://twitter.com/HamillHimself/status/719239858087182336

As you might have noticed, Rey (Daisy Ridley) appears to be undergoing Jedi training the way Luke Skywalker did from Yoda: with the Master riding on the pupil's back. Full circle the plot has come!

Related: Mark Hamill may have sneakily tweeted a 'Star Wars' spoiler. The troll is strong with him.

Woman records her surgery in case she dies, discovers doctors and nurses mocking her naked body.

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Ethel Easter secretly recorded her surgery at Houston's Lyndon B. Johnson hospital last year after her treatment by surgeons left her worried she wouldn't make it out. As she told the Washington Post, "I was fearful. I didn’t know if I was going to come out of the surgery, so I just wanted my family to know if something went on." What ended up being caught on tape wasn't malpractice, but what was recorded is very worrisome to anyone who has to go under the knife.

Things did not go well for Ethel Easter from the moment she walked into Lyndon B. Johnson hospital. She was complaining of excruciating abdominal pain and blood in her urine, and her stomach was covered in bruises. She was suffering from a hiatal hernia—a rip in the diaphragm that pushes the stomach up into the lung/heart area. It can cause heart attack-like symptoms and Ethel had suffered from dozens of such attacks in the 24 hours leading up to her visit.

The surgeon told her she could have an operation... in two months. As she told ABC News, when Easter got upset said she couldn't endure the pain for two months, the surgeon yelled back "Well, who do you think you are? You’re gonna wait like everybody else."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twMrpJa95jU

In the end, Easter did have to wait a month for the necessary surgery, and opted to stay at LBJ hospital despite hearing from her family physician that her surgeon had written "bad notes" in her file. Apparently, a surgeon's file on you can include "red flags" about your bad "attitude."

Indeed, the surgeon sure seemed to hold a grudge, because he loudly recounts his own version of the incident on tape, saying "She's a handful... she had some choice words for us in the clinic when we didn’t book her case in two weeks," and that she threatened to get a lawyer if no one treated her.  

Related: Patient under anesthesia accidentally records his doctor talking about wanting to punch his face.

He then joked about how people shouldn't talk that way to the person who will be cutting you up. He also describes her as a "handful," calls her "Precious" (like the movie), and says he feels bad for her husband based on her "queen" attitude. The nurses join in, too, with one getting huge laughs for "do you see that belly button?" Most disturbing is this exchange the Post wrote down from the original audio:

After the doctors concurred that there had been many “teaching moments” that day, the anesthesiologist asked, “Do you want me to touch her?”

“I can touch her,” the surgeon is heard saying.

“That’s a Bill Cosby suggestion,” someone interjected. “Everybody’s got things on phones these days. Everybody’s got a camera.”

“Do you have photos?” the surgeon asked a couple times. “[indiscernible] thought about it, but I didn’t do it.”

Finally, despite telling her physicians of her penicillin allergy, Easter was given an antibiotic with known side effects for people with penicillin allergies, swelling her arm up several times and restricting her breathing. Although she has mulled a lawsuit, Easter says she mostly just wants an apology and for doctors and nurses to change the way they speak about patients. As for the hospital, they said they reviewed the tape and saw no need for action.

Crane operator having a very bad day demonstrates how to crash a plane without ever flying it.

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This video from India's NDTV shows a crane lifting and then dropping a plane just outside of Hyderabad's Begumpet airport. The plane was being moved from a hangar to a neighboring training facility when the crane buckled, dropping the empty A320 on the walls of a private club. No injuries were reported, although you can see from the reaction of the woman who walks into the center of the frame after the plane falls, several minds were blown by the crane operator's incompetence.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FziLpDfwWnc

Related: These 21 horrible air travel stories will make you never want to fly again.


Thinking Of You

Melissa McCarthy becomes first woman to crowd surf her way to MTV's Comedic Genius Award.

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On Saturday, Melissa McCarthy, creator and star of The Boss, became the first woman to win the award for Comedic Genius at the 2016 MTV Movie Awards. Of course a win like that deserves a dramatic entrance, so instead of walking to the stage, she crowd-surfed the trip.

http://www.mtv.com/ontv/movieawards/videos/melissa-mccarthy-crowdsurfs-her-way-to-accepting-the-comedic-genius-award-2016-mtv-movie-awards/1360687/

McCarthy was pulled onto the stage by two men she thanked and referred to as "Mr. Rock Johnson" (actually Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson) and "The Rock's assistant" (actually Kevin Hart, who won Comedic Genius in 2015). Hart proceeded to accidentally drop (more like throw) her gold popcorn award onto the stage, in what McCarthy assured the audience was "not part of the bit."

In her speech, McCarthy said that while she may be the first woman to win the award, she's not the first one to deserve it. She described herself as a "walking human patchwork" of women she's admired and learned from, including Gilda Radner, Whoopi Goldberg, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Phyllis Diller, Bette Midler, Tracey Ullman, Carol Burnett, Lucille Ball, and her own mom, Sandy Lynn McCarthy, who taught her "not to fear being the butt of the joke, not to worry about being likable or perfect, and to lovingly go for the kill."

She went on to thank "every single person who buys a ticket for one of my movies or watches my show." Which was really nice, considering those are the fans who made sure her new movie, The Boss, unseated Batman v Superman this weekend to become the current number one film in the U.S.

Casey Patterson, the awards show's executive producer, said in a press release: “We love Melissa for her performances but she also writes, produces and directs comedy, so this award is incredibly well deserved. The most exciting thing about Melissa is how brave she is, you don’t want to miss her moment in the show.”

Ah, another woman called "brave" for being funny. Well, whatever, at least she won. Congratulations, Melissa, on a well deserved win!

Thank god this was a planned bit, imagine depending on the actual crowd.

John Oliver talks credit reports. Good news: they're B.S. Bad news: they're B.S. that can ruin you.

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Prepare to feel both better and worse about your terrible credit rating. John Oliver's latest takedown explores the frequency with which credit reports come loaded with errors and the lack of accountability for companies who provide credit ratings. That three-digit number preventing you from receiving a bank loan or renting an apartment may be inaccurate, which is great until you find out it's because the leading credit companies think you're dead, as one woman struggled to prove she wasn't in this edition of Last Week Tonight.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aRrDsbUdY_k

Beware if you have a similar-sounding name to someone in debt, because companies like Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion might attribute their debt to you, as Judy Thomas and Judith Kendall' found out.

In typical Oliverian fashion, Last Week Tonight hit back at those credit companies in the same way they've screwed over customers like Judy and Judith. The results are three evil new companies with familiar names.

If you need a shelter animal to lick peanut butter off your genitals and then promptly be sent back to the shelter, check out Oliver's Equifacks. Looking for someone to whisper passages from Mein Kampf into your baby's ear? Experianne's got your back. Or if you're just craving a bit of orca meat from SeaWorld, TramsOnion's there for you.

Rebel Wilson and Adam Devine got freaky at the MTV Movie Awards after winning Best Kiss.

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Rebel Wilson and Adam Devine won the MTV Movie Award for Best Kiss on Saturday night, and they celebrated by kissing again. A whole bunch. Wet and shamelessly. They won the award for their kiss in Pitch Perfect 2. This time around, kissing meant they tried to swallow each other whole like a snake eating a smaller animal.

"Thank you, guys. It's incredible we won this award because in real life we have absolutely no sexual chemistry," Wilson said when they accepted the award. DeVine followed and also played hard to get, "I mean, she's speaking the truth. We have none. Zero, zilch, nada. No, I'm not turned on. I'm not turned on by her soft, pillowy lips. I'm not. Sorry! I'm not."

https://twitter.com/THR/status/719339266124320772

Hopefully there's a Pitch Perfect 3 so everyone can watch those two go at it again.

Ryan Reynolds thanked Blake Lively by joking about their sex life live at the MTV Movie Awards.

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Ryan Reynolds took home the MTV Movie Award for best comedic performance last night, and he used his acceptance speech to joke about his sex life with his wife, Blake Lively, on national television. Aw! Sounds more like something that Deadpool would do. 

Reynolds said, "I want to thank my wife Blake. Everything I do is to make her laugh, especially the sex, so thank you, thank you very much you guys." 

What a weird glimpse into what happens behind closed doors for the married couple. Luckily, after more than three years of marriage (which is like fifteen years by Hollywood couple standards), Lively definitely knows how to take a joke from her husband. She knows how to dish 'em out, too. 

https://www.instagram.com/p/BBc39fkR4PY/?taken-by=blakelively

Two Deadpools, one cup. 

Deadpool look-a-likes also stormed the stage to dance to "Shoop," sung live by Salt-N-Pepa.

https://twitter.com/THR/status/719330090887225345?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

After the awards ceremony, Reynolds took to Twitter to thank MTV and make even more jokes. 

https://twitter.com/VancityReynolds/status/719373019240611840
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