We don't quarantine deliciousness, we guarantee it! (via Getty Images)
As many of you might know, New York's Mt Sinai Hospital admitted a patient on Monday who might have the ebola virus.
While the hospital hasn't released the patient's name or personal information, both to protect the patient's privacy and to keep the the undereducated, overly concerned masses from freaking the fuck out, someone went ahead and made the obligatory Twitter parody account, @MtSinaiEbolaGuy, to keep you informed of his comings and goings around heavily populated NYC.
Heading to @olivegarden for some Alfredo to calm my nerves!
— Mt Sinai Ebola Guy (@MtSinaiEbolaGuy) August 5, 2014
Who wants to know how many/which trains I took to get to @MountSinaiNYC ?
— Mt Sinai Ebola Guy (@MtSinaiEbolaGuy) August 4, 2014
That isolation chamber the news keeps mentioning is actually a @Starbucks bathroom. #outoforder
— Mt Sinai Ebola Guy (@MtSinaiEbolaGuy) August 5, 2014
Of course, the account is obviously intending to poke fun at all the people using the almost-case of ebola as an excuse to never leave their homes, but Whole Foods is just happy for the patronage , whether or not their customers are carrying a deadly virus that has killed over 800 people in West Africa.
@MtSinaiEbolaGuy You know it's good when there's a line! ;D Thanks for spending your lunch with us!
— Whole Foods Market (@WholeFoods) August 4, 2014Ya hear that, infected masses? Even when the whole world is logging on to WebMD to make sure their old case of SARS hasn't mutated into Ebola (can that happen?), Whole Foods is happy to share a meal with you, so get your sick butts over there and stand in line for some delicious salad! Don't worry CDC, they've got a sneeze guard.
(by Myka Fox)