Truly, we live in a brave and exciting time.
Tipping is very important to our society. Without it, we wouldn't be able to pay people inhumanly low wages—one of the founding principles of America. So, to keep everything running along correctly, we all give a certain amount of our inhumanly low wages to the people with really inhumane wages so that we can still get someone to make the overpriced coffee that keeps our eyelids from collapsing at our own jobs. Of course, if you're wealthy, these tips don't really mean much, which is why they tend to make servers work so much harder for it.
I hope they accept brains as a tip, because this just blew my mind.
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I assure m'lady that I respect her more than any of the presidents on money. Really.
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Found at a college pizza place. Also, anywhere modern 20-somethings live.
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Science has shown that Squirtle is objectively the best, but hey, people like fire.
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Depends on which model of the USS Enterprise you are attempting to depict.
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Apparently, someone read the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and wisely gave a towel.
Updated 7/2/14:
This is the most perfect one-line summary of working in the service industry, ever.
He looks a lot like Sad Keanu. ...And Keanu plays Neo, aka The One... *mind explodes*
That's BULLCRAP, Vader! We know you're just saving up for Death Star Three.
Ah HA! I TOLD YOU! Caught red-handed, mister. Or, red-disfigured-robo-handed, anyway.
-10 points for grossness, but +5 for having customers willing to read all of that.
You know, sometimes a straight-up "fuck yeah, money!" tip jar is better than any pun.
Updated 11/08/13:
But, what if I were to offer you a major tip augmentation?
Broke, addicted to drugs and having unsafe well-endowed sex is no way to go through life.
If you've got the cash to worry about boats capsizing, you can afford to tip.
So THAT's where that went.
It even has a working drawbridge in the back. Not really, but that would be neat. Legos!
Ohhhhhhhhh. I never could understand that lyric.
How's that hopey-tippy thing working out for you? Well? Oh. Ok, then.
Updated 10/04/13:
Maybe this tip jar will succeed where Sinead O'Connor failed.
Sadly, all the customers who might be sympathetic were home playing GTA V.
Baristas are like those tribal healers who absorb your pain and sickness for you.
Finding Mo-Ne.
Despite their slow land speeds, Sloths are excellent rocket pilots.
Updated 9/09/13:
If I could travel back in time, I'd stand behind Hitler in a cafe and tap my foot until he tipped.
Topical tipping? Typical.
Just slide that hot pizza grease all over my OW! OWOWOWO! OOOOUUUUCCCH HOT!
The ol' stick-it-to-the-man pitch. Real convincing, lemonade stand. "Boss"? More like "Dad."
Kitty's looking a little crosseyed to be holding such a sharp sword.
Just because he stopped wanting to go doesn't mean we can't still send him.
Updated 8/6/13:
Sadly, Predator seems to have intercepted all the tips here.
Where is Sally Struthers when you most need her?
George Lucas must shop here, because no one else has a problem with Han shooting first.
Every time you don't tip, his agent picks a script at random.
I don't always draw the Most Interesting Man in the World, but when I do, he looks way different.
Idiots. Lord of the Rings is what happens when you graduate from Hogwarts.
Updated 7/05/13:
Though they have repressive policies, the sea monsters are staunch War on Terror allies.
It's really unfair that those mullets are assigned to kids already wearing top-to-bottom denim.
His French Roast style is no match for my Frozen Mochachino.
No one has ever gotten pissed enough to write more than a $20 complaint...yet.
This would be a lot cooler if dolphins weren't serial rapists. Seriously, Google it.
All tips welcome, including the tips of toes.
Careful, the $10 in Tupac's jar is actually just a hologram.
Sadly, this jar only went on to be a one-tip wonder.
Is this that one where the tips monster attempts racial cleansing of mudbloods?
The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of gratuity.
I guess the previous tip drive for Walt to build a woman was successful.
Wow, either that currency is really weak or someone really agrees with Mr. Obama.
And if you're tipping under $1, it's also literally metal.
Paul Rudd. Baby seals grow up to be adults, but Paul Rudd will turn into a lemur in 2052.