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No matter how bad your worst breakup was, at least you didn't text and call your ex 21,807 times.

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"I am, how you say? Completely unhinged."

A depressed Frenchman, 33, made an impressive bid for the title of "Worst Ex-Boyfriend Of The Year" with his spectacular failure to deal with being dumped by a now 32-year-old teacher back in 2011. The man had been admitted to the hospital for depression in the past, and for lack of a better word, he went completely f-ing nuts in the aftermath of this breakup, and called and texted his ex 21,807 times over the course of 10 months, an average of 73 incidents of harassment a day. Behavior which, appropriately, has earned him a 10-month prison sentence (6 months of which has been suspended) and a €1,000 ($1,300) fine.

The man pled guilty and accepted responsibility for his actions, of which he now says, "I tell myself, with hindsight, that it was stupid." And boy, was it. The deranged ex (all names have been withheld) convinced himself that his ex owed him payment, or at least thanks, for work he had done on her apartment while they were dating. As he explained in court in Lyon, France, "At the time, my logic was that until she returns the money … or at least says thank you, I would not stop the calls." He also told the court of his plans to one day be a legal assistant, and (as if he needed to say it) that he had a "passion for writing."

Naturally, the woman attempted to block him on her phone line, which according to the victim's lawyer, Manuella Spee, did not deter the psycho ex, "he phoned her parents instead and her workplace." In desperation, she arranged a meeting through a mediator and thanked him. Finally, the deluge stopped.

Fortunately for the horrible Frenchman, I hear prison has been great for French writers in the past.

(by Johnny McNulty)


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