Here at Happy Place, staffers spend their days ten fingers deep inside the bowels of the Internet. They've dedicated their lives (between the hours of 10 and 6) to untangling the Web, and in the course of that task, have come across the best and worst that cyberspace has to offer. It would be a waste to not share that knowledge, so in the spirit of bookstore clerks making "staff picks," we asked our staff to share the stupidest thing on the web that made them laugh this week.
1: This baby is metal as fuck.
(Staffer Bob Powers)
(Via)
This baby can feel the metal flowing into its mouth and through its veins and is ready to grow up into a life of metal and bring metal unto the world all thanks to the invigorating power of pure, unrelenting, bottle-fed metal. Ozzy rules.
2: This tapir is shocked evolution even allowed it to exist.
(Staffer Johnny McNulty)
(Via)
This living, breathing creature with the face of Bert from Sesame Street and the ears of Shrek is extremely perplexed at the fact that it exists. The entire tapir species is rather dubious, as a matter of fact. Fortunately, through the power of Photoshop, many redditors found a way to make me giggle over and over agin at this majestically pointless beast.
(Via)
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3: Snoozing criminal is a lousy jewel thief, but a hall of fame Floridian.
(Staffer Jonathan Corbett)
(Via)
“Someone’s been sleeping in my bed—and he’s still here, catching a few Zs after filling a plastic bag full of our jewelry!” That someone isn’t Goldilocks, it’s master thief Dion Davis of Sarasota County, Florida, who was photographed by police this week just before they gently woke him from his slumber. Kidding, they probably tased the shit out of him!
4: The Beatles as they were meant to be heard.
(Staffer Dennis DiClaudio)
George Martin was a genius at production, but when he first brought the Beatles into the recording studio in 1962, the technology available to him was limited, to say the least. Today, we finally have the resources available to hear those early Lennon-McCartney compositions the way they had intended them to be heard — with dogs as instruments.
5: This muffin that looks like a mouse (or a hamster).
(Staffer Myka Fox)
(Via)
Look at this stupid muffin! It totally looks like a mouse or a hamster, but it is actually just a muffin that might have a mouse or hamster baked into it! This bakery either has a cuteness problem or a rodent solution, so put down that blackberry and find out. Optional: served with a side of wood shavings.