Most of us have at some point experienced a painfully awkward interaction with a store cashier after purchasing an embarrassing item or combination of items. But do cashiers actually judge us for what we buy? The answer is: sometimes. But it has to be pretty weird, wild, or salacious. Because people who work as professional store cashiers have truly seen it all.
Someone asked cashiers of Reddit: "what are some of the weirdest combinations you've seen on the conveyor?" These 22 cashiers share stories of the most memorable purchases they've seen a customer make:
1.) From wuapinmon:
Circa 1992, I had an approx 50 y/o lady come into the Kroger where I worked in Georgia and buy condoms, tampons, a Cosmopolitan, beer, kitty litter, and those birthday cake candles that don't blow out when you blow on them. I joked, "Big night, huh?" She responded, (and people didn't really drop the f-bomb in suburban Atlanta back then), "You have no f**king idea, honey."
2.) From dingdongsalesman:
A crackhead came in to my workplace once and tried to pay for a shopping cart
3.) From jasonhackwith:
I had an obviously high as a kite gentleman who came through my line once. Came heel-toeing it into my lane, trying very hard to appear sober.
He was terribly fascinated by the various flavors of chapstick we had and he was having the worst case of indecision. He would pick one up, stare at it for a couple minutes, shake his head, then grab another and go, "Whoah, pumpkin pie!" then stare at that one.
Then he'd turn and say, "Hey boss, how're you doin' man?"
I'd reply that I was fine, and he'd go back to being fascinated over something else in the lane. Then a couple moments later he asked me the same question.
I got done ringing up his items (fortunately no alcohol or I would have had to deny its sale). He had 26 individual bags of Cheetos (he cleaned out the supply on several lanes), a whole apple pie, a whole cherry pie, our largest tub of macaroni salad (with a plastic fork from the deli sitting on top of it), a tube of toothpaste, and ten 5 hour energy shots. Lord I hoped he wasn't going to take them all at once.
He eventually decided against the chapstick and was lost in thought for another long moment, staring intently at the candy. All of a sudden he grabbed a Whatchamacallit, giggled, and set it gingerly on the belt like it was an egg.
I rang it up, gave him the grand total, and he said, "Perfect! Yes!" then practically danced over to pay and then grab his bags. As he left he turned and said over his shoulder, "You're awesome, bro!" and heel-toed it out of the store.
I love my job.
4.) From pakidara:
The only time I've wondered about people is when their total comes to $6.66 so they go grab something else. (Worked at a gas station)
5.) From defenselaywer:
When Kmart went out of business they marked stuff down 50 percent. I bought a shitload of Depends for my elderly relative. As luck would have it, they still had dozens of boxes of enemas. Husband uses them to orally hydrate calves (baby cows). I can only imagine what other shoppers and the cashiers were thinking.
6.) From shawanjunk:
The one that comes to mind is a guy came in drunk and tried to buy a single carrot. He must’ve gotten hungry while waiting in line because he took a massive bite out of it. Then he didn’t understand that we sold them by weight and we were trying to figure out how to charge him for it when half of it was in his stomach
7.) From EverElusiveKudo:
I was a cashier years ago, and as I was ringing through a cart full, I picked up a bottle of warming lube. The label was wrinkled on the bar code so I took some time to smooth it out so it would scan and the guy thought I was examining it or something, and said in a rawr wink wink kind of voice, "it's for her." And pointed at the lady with him. Okayyy. Thanks for the clarification, thought you were gonna spread it on toast.
8.) From lotusfairymoon:
I worked as a cashier at a restaurant and we had a regular. We called her sour cream lady because everytime she came in she would order 11 sides of sour cream with her food.
Her face would always flush but no matter what she always got her 11 sides of sour cream. I totally judged.
9.) From JOEYisROCKhard:
When I was a young checker at a grocery store a dude comes through my line at around 5:30 PM on a Friday night. He's wearing a cheap three piece suit and I get the vibe that he's going on a date night with...someone.
The items on the belt- 4 bottles of red wine, box of Trojans, bottle of KY jelly and a blank VHS tape.
I mean, maybe the blank VHS tape had absolutely nothing to do with the other items. But also maybe sex tape.
10.) From throwawayable5:
This was before I was a cashier but I was behind a guy at the register of a sporting good store and he bought duct tape, rope, a knife, and a gun. As he was checking out he asked the lady at the register, “do you guys carry body bags?” I kid you not. He asked for body bags. I was like 10 at the time and terrified. I later realised it was a sporting good store and he probably wanted them for like deer or something but still...
11.) From maisie0112:
A regular at my store comes in every week to buy half a dozen gallon jars of mayo.
Yes, they make gallon jars of mayo. Yes, 6 of them. Yes, every week. No, I don't know why.
12.) From ActionJ4ck:
Condoms and Yoo-hoos.
Nothing like sipping Yoo-hoo after some woo-hoo, I guess.
13.) From BhiQ42:
I asked a woman who regularily bought all of our cream cheese (10-20 300g packs at a time)what she's using the cream cheese for once... wasn't judging or anything, just curious.
Turns out her family just seems to eat a lot of bread ...
14.) From Infinityjupiter:
15.) From tomorrowistomato:
I once had a customer buy like $80 worth of gummy vitamins. That was all he wanted. I don't know what his plans were but I was certainly curious.
16.) From AaronVsMusic:
This one evening, these two college aged girls came through my lane, buying chocolates, condoms, and peanut butter. They both were dressed like they were going out clubbing, and neither of them looked happy.
17.) From IAmASolipsist:
At my first job, Taco Bell, I definitely judged the people ordering 3 Chili Cheese Burritos every day. That shit was made from yesterday's already questionable ground beef. I don't know why, but there was a lot of people who'd get 3 every day.
On some level, you've got to love yourself more than that.
18.) From Diligent_Slide:
I used to buy shit from Walmart in weird combinations just for something to do. My favorite was a gallon of mayonnaise, a 36 pack of flavored condoms, the biggest zucchini I could find, lube, whipped cream, and yeast infection cream. The cashier looked at me like she was disgusted, but couldn't hold in her curiosity. She asked me why I bought these particular items and I told her I was going to talk to a man about buying a horse. It's the only time I've heard someone say "bruh" as their only response to something. I used every thing I bought except the mayo, which I gave to my mayo loving father for his birthday.
19.) From IamfromCanuckistan:
Spent many years as a cashier and never saw anything as weird as the one time I was the customer and just happened to need vaseline and some bungee cords.
20.) From Merlion2018:
Worked at Whole Foods for 3 years. I almost never paid attention to someone’s cart buuut, one day a woman purchased like 14 varieties of coffee and felt the need to tell me she was doing trial and error to determine the best coffee enema.
Could have just been a joke but given the usual WFM customer, I’m inclined to take her at her word.
21.) From hawkeye18:
The only thing I recall thinking was of any note during my tenure as a cashier was an attractive young couple who bought two things, and two things only: Carpet cleaner, and a Fleets enema.
22.) From Paksarra:
The weirdest one was someone who bought nothing but $63 worth of store brand gelatin in about half a dozen flavors. I occasionally regret not asking.