What do Jackie Chan, the Icelandic Prime Minister, and Emma Watson have in common? The Panama Papers.

It does not make for a good punchline, but it does drag the former Harry Potter actress into a global scandal exposing wealthy folks' rampant use of offshore bank accounts to avoid taxes.

Watson's name was tied to the leaked documents on the searchable Offshore Leaks Database, where "Emma Charlotte Duerre Watson" is listed as a beneficiary of a company in the British Virgin Islands. Her representatives have responded in a statement to The Spectator.

Emma (like many high profile individuals) set up an offshore company for the sole purpose of protecting her anonymity and safety. UK companies are required to publicly publish details of their shareholders and therefore do not give her the necessary anonymity required to protect her personal safety, which has been jeopardized in the past owing to such information being publicly available.

Offshore companies do not publish these shareholder details. Emma receives absolutely no tax or monetary advantages from this offshore company whatsoever – only privacy.

If her intentions were truly pure, Watson gets a pass. It's easy to understand why someone who has paparazzi trying to sneak up-skirts of them would want a little privacy.

Jackie Chan gets a pass too, just because he's so god damn good at karate.

Russian cake artist Olga Noskova creates desserts that make Betty Crocker recipes look like the bathroom of a Guy Fieri restaurant. Her over 50,000 Instagram followers would probably agree.

Many of her works boast glossy surfaces so perfectly smooth you can literally see your face in them. Here's Olga taking a selfie in one.

Okay, now that you've got a small taste of some of Olga's work, take a moment to shut the door, turn off the lights, and get comfortable. Prepare for a more intimate experience with the finest cakes out of non-Russian citizens' reach.

Ready?

Are you sure?

You're sweating already. Calm yourself, take a deep breath, and take our hand.

Wow, you're wheezing pretty loudly over there. Catch your breath before moving on.

To answer the question you've been intensely whispering to no one as you drool all over yourself, yes, her non-glossy work is just as dazzling.

Yeah baby. Bet you want to see what's inside these bad boys too, don't you?

There's no reason to even ask if you want to see the drizzle. You definitely want to. You'd force your grandparents to enlist in the army all over again for this.

Alright, you've had enough for today.

Go clean yourself up and get back to work, and then follow Olga on Instagram here.

Kirk Alexander of Salem, Oregon was such a loyal Domino’s Pizza customer that when he didn’t place an order at the restaurant for 11 days, the staff got worried. In an ultimate twist of irony, it was notordering Domino's Pizza that saved Alexander's life.

Sarah Fuller, the general manager at a Salem-area Domino’s, told KOIN 6 News that he had been a regular customer since 2009:

He orders every day, every other day. We saw the last order was 11 days ago. We knew something wasn’t right, that wasn’t normal at all.

It was so unusual, in fact, that they sent a delivery driver to check on him on Sunday. When the driver arrived at Alexander’s house, she knew something was wrong. The lights were on and the TV was playing, but Alexander didn’t answer the door. He also didn’t pick up his phone, so the driver called 911.

Police responded and were able to get Alexander to the hospital, where he's recovering from a possible stroke. In a final gesture of kickass customer service, the driver visited him at the hospital, and he smiled upon seeing his visitor.

A message from the local sheriff's office, who were just as shocked that Domino's can do good as you are.

On Sunday, May 8th an alert Domino’s delivery driver called the Sheriff’s Office after a regular customer failed to order a pizza from the Salem area company. Tracey Hamblen, an employee at Domino’s on Silverton Road NE, called the Sheriff’s Office after not speaking with the customer in 11 days. Mr. Hamblen had formed a relationship with the victim because of the regular orders and knew he suffered form severe health issues.

When the Sheriff’s Office arrived at the residence in the 4100 block of Penticton Circle NE, they could hear a man calling for help from inside the residence. Deputies forced entry and found Kirk Alexander, age 48, of Salem down and in need of immediate medical attention.

Thanks to the quick actions of Mr. Hamblen, Mr. Alexander is in stable condition at the Salem Hospital. The Sheriff’s Office would like to personally thank Mr. Hamblen for his quick actions and willingness to take time out of his day to care for others.

His doctors are going to have a tough time convincing him to lay off the pizza after he gets discharged.

London receptionist Nicole Thorpe claims that she was sent home on the first day of her job this past December because she committed a huge no-no: wearing flats. Thorpe refused to comply with reception firm PwC's dress code that instructs female receptionists to be uncomfortable all day by wearing shoes that have two to four inch heels. 

When Thorpe argued that her male coworker was not required to do the same, she was apparently laughed at. A boy wearing heels?! Now they've heard everything! 

"I said 'if you can give me a reason as to why wearing flats would impair me to do my job today, then fair enough,' but they couldn't," Thorpe told the BBC. Apparently, the company couldn't think of a reason that a taller receptionist with more shapely calves would also be a better receptionist. 

She said that her job is to guide clients to meeting rooms during a nine-hour shift. "I just won't be able to do that in heels," she argued, presumably while stretching our her toes in breathable flats.

The Guardian reports that after she wrote about the incident on her Facebook page, Thorpe discovered that other women had found themselves in similar situations. She created an online petition asking for a law that would put an end to companies forcing women to wear heels at work.

She told the BBC:

I don’t hold anything against the company necessarily, because they are acting within their rights as employers to have a formal dress code, and, as it stands, part of that for a woman is to wear high heels. I think dress codes should reflect society and nowadays women can be smart and wear flat shoes. 

Apart from the debilitating factor, it’s the sexism issue. I think companies shouldn’t be forcing that on their female employees.

The petition has over 11,000 signatures.

“We have taken on board the comments regarding footwear and will be reviewing our guidelines in consultation with our clients and team members," a PwC representative said.

It's time to take a stand against heels—not just at work, but in general. Women have suffered for far too long. If we can't eliminate heels, then we need to add something to men's everyday wardrobe that makes them equally uncomfortable—collars that intermittently deliver an electric shock? Just brainstorming.

The little cousin of Glaswegian Darren Law had a very specific answer when asked what she wanted for her birthday: "frozen pyjamas," Law wrote in a tweet.

The considerate older cousin—who undoubtedly knows what Frozen is— delivered a bit too literally.

Law's Scottish accent (which you can hear if you read closely enough) is what makes this little prank great. "& a went sound no bother"—more people need to say that.  

As Law didn't tweet a picture of real Frozen pjs, there's no knowing if his little cousin got what she wanted in the end, like this girl did from her brother.

Families are the best.

In a lengthy article that delivered on the scholarly premise promised in the headline, "Muslim Leaders Wage Theological Battle, Stoking ISIS' Anger," the New York Times apparently misrepresented Imam Suhaib Webb's Snapchat handle. It is not, as previously printed, "Pimpin4Paradise786."

The unlikely correction reads:

Because of an editing error, an article on Monday about a theological battle being fought by Muslim imams and scholars in the West against the Islamic State misstated the Snapchat handle used by Suhaib Webb, one of Muslim leaders speaking out. It is imamsuhaibwebb, not Pimpin4Paradise786.

Hugo Cornellier took a selfie every day for 8 years, creating his own 2-minute version of Boyhood. In a tale told through changing backgrounds, bone structure, and facial hair, you can see Hugo grow up (all while maintaining his signature expression)—moving on up from his parents' kitchen to secluding himself in his bedroom, to a college dorm, to a boring-ass cubicle, all while experimenting with many different haircuts.

The years-long project clearly took a whole lot of effort. "Stabilizing all my selfies was by far the most time-consuming personal project I have ever undertaken. I've had to edit, align and re-touch every single photo ONE-by-ONE," he writes in the video's description, "It took me about a minute per photo once I got the hang of it (and there are well over 2000 photos)."

Cornellier adds that the project is still on going: See y'all at the 10 year mark. ;) ... I will never stop taking pics. Ever."

Only time will tell if he ever settles on a consistent haircut.

Unlike Eva Mendes, Blake Lively is still toting around her second child. The mother of 19-month-old James hit up the Cannes Film Festival because she's in Woody Allen's new star-studded flick Café Society (other people still willing to work with Allen in 2016 include Kristen Stewart and Jesse Eisenberg).

For the film's press call, Lively wore a red jumpsuit from Juan Carlos Obando, according to Elle. This jumpsuit is quite different from Blac Chyna's. 

The loose-fitted fabric and backwards scarf are lovely choices both for adorning a pregnant woman and piloting a retro plane. Snoopy knows.

This outfit shows off Lively's baby bump much more than her dress did the previous day.

Lively's really into little strips of fabric hanging off her outfits.

Reddit user smileh had to bring his French bulldog named Barry White (yes, that's his real name) in for an MRI scan, and returned with something truly ridiculous

For everyone who thinks French bulldogs look ridiculous on the outside...

It turns out, they look even more ridiculous on the inside. 

From the side, Barry White seems like your everyday duck/dog hybrid with a skull so thick it could safely house your collection of potato chips shaped like weird things. 

But then, from the front, he's an alien made completely out of eyes.  

Perhaps most bizarre is his view from the top down. 

His brain and eyes looks like a turtle that grabbed a hold of two beach balls and refuses to let go. There's so much extra room in the skull, is that more room for love? 

Or is that extra space the answer to why French bulldogs do this:

Jennifer Lawrence and Chris Martin—that Hollywood couple that didn't make sense until it suddenly did—were on-and-off for about a year until they finally cut the cord last summer. While sources suggested the break-up was over Martin's desire to keep it cas, InTouch Weekly has come up with a much more entertaining reason for the couple's demise: the Kardashians. 

More specifically, Lawrence's love for the Kardashians, which she's been open about before.

"Jennifer was obsessed with the family, and tried to get Chris to watch the show with her. Chris absolutely balked at the idea, and couldn't sit for five minutes of the show," the source apparently said. "The Kardashians are everything that is wrong with America, according to Chris."

Martin may be onto something, but Lawrence didn't agree. "Jennifer thought Chris was being snobby and elitist by trashing the Kardashians because he wouldn't even give it a chance," the source claimed. "[He] wasn't going to stay in a relationship with someone that was obsessed with reality television."

Martin is British and was married to Gwyneth Paltrow, thus lending some credit to this source's claim of his snobbishness. Plus, Jennifer Lawrence does f*cking love the Kardashians.

"I was crying about the Kardashians the other night," Lawrence recently told E! News. "They're under a lot of pressure. Even if its elective, it's pressure—and I get that!" Of course Jennifer Lawrence "gets that." Jennifer Lawrence is so damn relatable, she gets everything.

Stars are just like us, right? Actually they might be a little more like that wacky uncle you have muted on Facebook. From believing in Bigfoot to getting freaky between the sheets with a ghost, to crazy conspiracy theories, these weird celebrity beliefs might change the way you look at famous people.

1. Megan Fox believes it all. She thinks Bigfoot, aliens, leprechauns, and ghosts are all real.

Here she is telling MTV news about some of her wild theories. 50 bucks says she believes the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are real.

2. Russell Crowe doesn't just believe in aliens, he caught one on video.

The actor set up a camera outside of his office in Sydney, Australia to film bats (um, ok?) but instead he captured what he says is a genuine alien sighting. Crowe tweeted, “UFO? Time Lapse Photos Outside RC’s Woolloomooloo Office (THESE ARE REAL!)” and uploaded this video with the same name to YouTube. The Internet widely disputed the video, even though he said "THESE ARE REAL!" in all caps, which guarantees it's legit.

3. Fran Drescher's close encounter was even closer. She believes she was was abducted by aliens. 

Before she was The Nanny, Fran Drescher says she and her ex husband were both abducted by aliens when they were children. Fran told the Huffington Post, “We were both in junior high. A few years later, we met, and we realized that we had the same experience. I think that somehow we were programmed to meet. We both have this scar. It’s the exact same scar on the exact same spot.” 

Fran's ex said the scar on her hand was from a drill bit or burning herself with a hot cup of water. Fran response to that was, “I said to him, that’s what the aliens programmed us to think, but really, that’s where the chip is.” 

4. Missy Elliott is afraid of black cats. 

We've all heard the superstition that a black cat crossing your path is bad luck, but rapper Missy Elliott actually takes that one seriously. She told Rolling Stone,

If I see a black cat down my street, I turn around and go the other way. Even if I'm late. I'll be late for the airport and be in a limo, and if I see a black cat, I'll be like, 'Sir, you have to turn around and go down the next street.'

5. Sammy Hagar believes he was abducted by aliens too.

The former Van Halen frontman told MTV, about his extra-terrestrial experience,

[Aliens] were plugged into me. It was a download situation. This was long before computers or any kind of wireless. There weren’t even wireless telephones. Looking back now, it was like, 'F*ck, they downloaded something into me!' Or they uploaded something from my brain, like an experiment.

6. So you got abducted by aliens. Big deal. Tom Cruise thinks he is an alien. 

Tom Cruise, John Travolta, and Will Smith are just some of the celebrities who are Scientologists. As you may have heard, Scientologists believe they are reincarnated aliens who used to live on other planets. Planets where it's totally chill to jump on couches and throw people off of boats.

7. Forget aliens for a second, poor little Ariana Grande is getting haunted by demons from Hell.

Ariana Grande told Complex Magazine that after a ghost hunting trip with her friends in Kansas City, she has been harassed by demons:

I felt this sick, overwhelming feeling of negativity over the whole car and we smelled sulfur, which is the sign of a demon, and there was a fly in the car randomly, which is another sign of a demon. I was like, 'This is scary, let’s leave.' I rolled down the window before we left and said, 'We apologize. We didn’t mean to disrupt your peace.' Then I took a picture and there are three super distinct faces in the picture—they’re faces of textbook demons. The next day I tried to send the picture to my manager and it said, 'This file can’t be sent, it’s 666 megabytes.' I’m not kidding.

She deleted the picture of the demons, so they would leave her alone, but it didn't work and they followed her home. Not cool, demons.

8. Emma Stone's ghost is much nicer. It's her Grandpa. 

Emma believes her grandpa who died before she was born, visits her and leaves her quarters. "It's him!" she told David Letterman, "It's absolutely him." 

9. Lucy Liu actually got it on with a ghost.

Back in 1999, Lucy apparently told Us Weekly that she had a sexual encounter with a ghost. She described the experience in detail:

Some sort of spirit came down from God knows where and made love to me. It was sheer bliss. I felt everything. I climaxed. And then he floated away. It was almost like what might have happened to Mary. That’s how it felt. Something came down and touched me, and now it watches over me.

10. Lady Gaga doesn't want to have sex with anyone.

In an interview with Vanity Fair, Lady Gaga said she's afraid someone might steal her creative juices from her vajayjay. "I have this weird thing that if I sleep with someone they're going to take my creativity from me through my vagina."

Hmm, must've missed that day in health class.

11. Alicia Silverstone is all about sharing her juices. She thinks you should spit food directly into your baby's mouth.

She made our hearts flutter in the 90s, but today she's making our stomachs turn. Silverstone believes in feeding her baby mama bird style, by chewing up it up and then barfing it into her child's mouth. Let's hope she makes enough money on Clueless royalties to pay for this kid's future therapy bills. 

Quick, look at 90s Alicia to wash your eyeballs out:

12. Demi Lavato believes in aliens and mermaids, and that mermaids are aliens. 

The pop star told Seth Meyers that she believes Mermaids are “an alien species living in parts of the Indian Ocean, which we have never explored before as human beings—and Christopher Columbus had actually seen three mermaids on his way to America.”

Laugh all you want, but if Christopher Columbus saw them, then they must be real. He definitely didn't get anything wrong when he made it to India America.  

13. Mark Ruffalo is a 9/11 truther.

Who would've guessed nice guy Mark Ruffalo thinks 9/11 was an inside job? In the video below, he states a lot of his theories on the subject, like "buildings don't fall down like that." He's says there was no evidence at the scene, and the investigation is illegitimate because it only goes from “the moment the planes hit to the moment the buildings fell, and nothing before or nothing after.” It's not on this video, but pretty sure at some point he's uttered the phrase, "Wake up, sheeple!"

14/15. Rapper B.o.B and Tila Tequila both think the Earth is flat. 

In 2016, the rapper and the reality star both took to Twitter to share their flat Earth beliefs, and other conspiracy theories about everything from cloning, to government frequencies to Snapchat.

Tila's Twitter has since been deleted. Wait a second, maybe she and B.o.B are the same person? Whoa.

Nicki Minaj said on Twitter that she's being sued by her ex-boyfriend Safaree Samuels and that the suit alleges that she abused him physically and emotionally, which she says is a lie and extortion. According to TMZ, the suit also alleges that Samuels made substantial, unpaid contributions to three of Minaj's albums. Sheesh—this makes the feud between Drake and Minaj's current boyfriend Meek Mill look tame by comparison. Tweeted Minaj:

From these tweets, it sounds like God is on Minaj's side, at very least.

But Samuels, asked about the beef with Minaj last night at Blac Chyna's emoji party (yes, that was a thing, and yes, Blac Chyna has gotten a good publicist lately), seemed unperturbed.

Some math nerds over at Cordcutting.com calculated that watching Netflix could save viewers six days worth of commercials over the course of a year, which viewers will probably waste on six days of looking at their phones. Netflix, which is free of ads, was compared to data for viewing cable TV, which sprays people with every type of ad imaginable.

Here's the breakdown on how they crunched the numbers: Netflix has 75 million subscribers that stream a total of 125 million hours every day. That averages to each person watching a little over 1.5 hours of Netflix every day (you know you've binged so much more in a sitting).

A typical hour of cable TV includes 15 minutes and 38 seconds of commercials (damn). Based on that figure, if they were watching Netflix instead of cable TV, they'd skip just under 160 hours of commercials every year.

It's a rough comparison, and there are other ways to skip commercials, like DVR fast-forwarding and arguing with loved ones. Not to worry, advertising will find a way to get in front of everyone's eyes, even if it's not on TV.

Back in 2000, before Beyoncé's reign as Queen had truly begun, she was just a simple, only-moderately-famous celebrity, living with her best friends and family in a giant house in Houston, Texas. Recently, this 2000 episode of Cribs resurfaced on Decider, and it will make you yearn for both a simpler time and a Destiny's Child reunion tour. Beyoncé, Kelly and Michelle, all clad in black tank tops and jeans, proudly showed off their six-bedroom home, which probably is less than half the size of whatever mansion Beyoncé lives in now.

It is hard to tell what the best part of this video truly is. Maybe it's that little sister Salonge's bedroom was a renovated garage while Beyoncé had a lavish, Arabian Nights-themed boudoir, sort of setting up their dynamic that will follow them into adulthood?

Maybe it's the fact that (as usual) Michelle kind of got pushed to the background and doesn't even seem to live in the same house as Beyoncé and Kelly?

Or was it that Beyoncé got really excited about having an intercom in her home, something that 2016 Beyonce would not even notice?

Nah, the best part is definitely the girls excitedly showing the camera crew their bag of Popeyes, because food is something you, a non-famous person, can get excited over, too. If Beyoncé and Jay-Z ever get divorced, she should totally move back in with Kelly and Michelle, revamp Destiny's Child, and continue to take over the world. 

Haircuts are an important part of most people's lives, but just like everything else in the world, they aren't always good. Whether it's because you went to a new stylist, did it yourself, or had a friend give it a try (goodbye, friendship), haircuts and color don't always turn out like you planned. Sometimes, the plan was bad to begin with. Here are some "When Haircuts Attack" stories. Spoiler: there's a lot of crying involved.

1. When you try to go blonde using a drugstore kit.

2. When the salon owner mistakes lightening powder for organic conditioner.

In 2014, aspiring Brazilian model Myrella Ikeda sued Antonio Luis Rosa and Jonice Padilha, the co-owners of salon J. Sisters, after Ikeda went in for a haircut and left with significantly less hair—but due to scissors. Rosa told Ikeda he was going to hydrate her hair with an organic product, but instead accidentally used Naturlite White Lightening Powder, which is basically bleach. WHOOPS!

According to the lawsuit, "Ikeda felt like he was putting fire or rubbing hot pepper into her head. Rosa told Ikeda it was 'normal,' and 'don’t worry.'" He then left the product in her hair for an hour. After he washed it out, he tried to use a straightening iron on it. “Immediately, her hair started to fall, burnt and crumbled.” Ikeda said her hair grew back, but it's now thinner and her scalp is still partly numb.

3. When you try to do your roots.

4. When it rains on your hair parade.

(from Pagan-za on Reddit)

I had actually forgotten about this memory. We went to some party or event as teenagers and decided it would be cool to make our hair blue. So we used blue hair colouring, and it actually turned out ok. Until later on at the actual event, [when] it started raining. I looked like a smurf for a week.

5. When you think you can do your own ombre (spoiler alert: you can't.)

6. When even the salon can't tell what color they were going for.

(via xovain)

I left the salon with roots that were lightened, a band of orange and dingy purple desperately clinging to my fried ends.

I should have known the appointment was going to be a disaster when the apprentice thought scrubbing my freshly bleached hair and scalp like an iron pan was a good idea. They toned me three times, which was a huge red flag that something wasn’t right; in the four-plus years I’ve had platinum hair, I’ve never been toned three times.

I was hoping as I dried my hair myself (it’s now 25 bucks to have someone blow dry your hair at this salon) that it would even out and lighten up. The head colour technician walked with a look of horror but said nothing.

I was in complete shock. As I went downstairs to collect my things, the lady working the coat check asked me what colour my hair was supposed to be. Not a good sign. As I cashed out, I saw the receptionist give me a quick up-down look of pity before she composed herself and asked me for my $130—which was also a shock to me, as it had been $70 before (the reason I went to this salon in the first place).

7. When you want to look hot but not in a way that burns.

(via SunnyLego on Reddit)

The first time I ever had it bleached. Was a teen going from dark brown natural hair to purple. Was sitting there, and bleach started burning tons, sat there a bit more thinking "Am I just being a wuss?" asked my boyfriend, he touched my hair and burnt his hand. They rushed me to the sink, and I heard a huge "WOAH!" when they put water on to rinse, because it all steamed up. I was sitting there thinking.. "Do I still have hair?" Yes I did, but ended up with a shorter haircut than planned...

8. When you were doomed from the start.

(via Delightfully on Reddit)

I am a natural blonde and dyed my hair for most of high school. I had a bit of a deep cappuccino brown going on.

I decided it wasn't worth keeping up with the roots anymore and wanted to go back to blonde. Knowing that if I let it grow out, I'd have a super weird reverse ombre going on, so I went out and bought de-colorizer. My hair turned white at the top, gradually turning bright orange the closer you came towards the ends. It had uneven spots all over and looked a little like a very ill leopard.

Knowing I couldn't go outside like that, I bought a light brown dye and immediately dyed over it. It was obviously too light to hide it all, so I still had uneven spots.

Next day, terrified little me only went to the first class of high school and then decided to go out to the hairdresser. Hairdresser decided the best way to fix it was to literally paint it BLACK and then add in blonde highlights (YES F*CKING PEROXIDE IN MY ALREADY DEAD HAIR) that started somewhere a few inches down my actual roots, so it looked really weird. She charged me 200 euros for the dye job too. I don't even know how I managed to get it back to blonde eventually, but I did.

...And that's how I spent over a thousand bucks on revitalizing my hair in the last few years.

9. When there's no going back.

10. When you ask for "just a trim." Lol.

(via bonobo_phone on Reddit)

I went in to Sport Clip for a trim ("oh, yeah, they do cheap women's haircuts too!"). My hair is about armpit length, I wanted a half-inch trim that kept my inch-deep layers. She gave me a half-inch trim that brought my layers up above my earlobes. It was half Rachel, half mullet. I cried.

11. When there's an actual nightmare on your head.

12. When the stylist gets distracted.

(via Anon_E_moose on Reddit)

Went to my usual lady. Told her 'the usual', which was shoulder length with long layers. Took a phone call from angsty teenage son. Looked up to see she'd given me a Carol Brady. Cried for two days.

13. When the stylist has ideas of his own.

(via KateKillz on Reddit)

A new hair salon opened up near or house that advertised $5 hair cuts. We were pretty poor, so my mom brought us there. The catch was that the stylist would ignore what you told him and 'felt the inspiration' to make you look fabulous however he saw fit.

While making small talk he found out that my brother is gay. 20 minutes later, Bam! Unsolicited pink weave.

14. When you might have to stage an intervention for the stylist.

(via zygote_harlot on Reddit)

As she was cutting my hair, she said 'If I had to cut hair for the rest of my life I'd kill myself.'

15. When mom gets involved.

(via littlebloodmage on Reddit)

I used to have shoulder-length hair. My mom, who has 0 hair styling experience, decides out of the blue to give me a Fantasia Burrino (who at the time had just won American Idol) haircut. The end result was a military style crew cut. I got mistaken for a boy for months on end.

16. When your stylist is Randy Quaid fan.

(via BossVal on Reddit)

The cut I received was a bit like a pixie and a shag had a child, but then left it alone with a lawnmower. My hair was chin length at the longest part, and without tons of product to weigh it down would frequently puff out sideways leaving me looking like Randy Quaid in Kingpin.

17. When someone messes up your bangs.

18. When you try to cut your own bangs.

(via CumquatDangerpants on Reddit)

I was twelve and wanted those long bangs that was in style (like on either side of my face. I took scissors and clipped them myself. I ended up looking like a bad mark Hamill haircut.

19. When you don't learn from other martyrs who have tried to cut their own bangs.

(via hubbleisland on Reddit)

Tried to cut my bangs myself. WORST idea ever. Literally cut the ENTIRE front part off. 4 inches of hairline completely gone. Had to wear a headband to cover it up for almost a year. Absolutely mortifying and I am never cutting my own hair again.

20. When you refuse to listen about not cutting your own bangs.

21. When you get all DIY with the buzzer.

(via papercowmoo on Reddit)

If you think that's bad, check out what I did to myself during my second year of college. I went to work every day like that for a month before it grew out enough to the point where it wasn't that noticeable.

22. When you the metric system bites you in the ass.

(via glah_king on Reddit)

I live in the US, went to a barber in Europe while on business trip. When I told what length to cut my hair, I gave it in American standards. When the barber started cutting, it was way shorter than I remembered. Then, I realized that size 6 in Europe is 6 millimeters, not 6th of an inch. As he finished cutting, I looked in the mirror, and I've never seen my veins in my head so blue.

TL;DR Forgot about the metric system, became an accidental skinhead.

23. When your barber is a sadist.

(via Harmelion on Reddit)

I had always gone to the same place to get my haircut growing up, and the guy just knew what I wanted to look like, so I never had to ask for anything specific. I moved for college so I had to find a barber.

I knew a 1 was short, but I thought that a 2 would be like . . . medium. So I asked for a 1 on the sides and a 2 up top, thinking I would get my usual. The guy looked at me and said "Wow, really? That short?", and my hair was pretty long at that time so I was just like "Yeah, totes man."

So he went to town on my hair, and eventually he started up top, while I just stared with my best poker face, not wanting people to know how stupid I was. At the end, he said "Well there you go! A one and a two!" with this inflection in his voice that implied that he knew that I knew that I just fucked up. He asked if it was okay and I was like "Yeah man, perfect, hahaha!", and then I paid and went home and cried.

24. When you think a perm might be a good idea.

(via FlatCatShop on Reddit)

Went in for a body wave a month before my honeymoon. Stylist says 'Sure, no problem! I can do that!' and proceeds to pull out teeny tiny fish-bone sized rollers. Rolls up my hair and leaves me sitting there soaking in perming solution. After all the rollers were taken out, my hair is clearly NOT in a body wave - it's in the tightest 80's spiral perm imaginable. Tell the stylist this isn't what I wanted, he says 'Don't worry, this is just what it looks like at first! It'll loosen up!'

It didn't loosen up. Kept my hair in a bun for an entire year until I said to hell with the whole thing and got a pixie cut. For four years, my passport photo reflected that awful, AWFUL perm.

25. When you realize a perm is actually the worst idea.

(via chiflower on Reddit)

My grandfather often took me to get my hair braided for the summer, so he wouldn't have to deal with it. After a few summers of getting my scalp tortured by heavy-handed ladies, I asked for a perm. He took me to a nice old Korean lady who was a friend of his. This wonderful old lady unfortunately knew nothing about textured hair. After 20 mins with the perm in I was crying to have it out. She just smeared some Vaseline on my edges. When it finally got washed out I had a huge round part of my scalp that was burned away. By some miracle my hair was still there but underneath my scalp was a matted scab for months; years later combing it too hard would reopen the wound. Never again.

26. When you are maybe not clear about what look you are going for.

(via Seventeen magazine)

I go to the hairstylist for every dance in high school. It's my one splurge! By now, most of the stylists know that I like my hair in an up do, curled, sometimes with a few loose pieces. Unfortunately, on my last visit, I must not have specified exactly what I was looking for. When they spun my chair around, I had cornrows! I'm a redhead with pale skin that does not need to show on top of my head. You can imagine my shock.

27. When the styling product is blood.

(via skulk on Reddit)

I was 10ish and too shy to say anything. The stylist cut the hand she was using to hold my hair between her thumb and pointer with the scissors. It started to gush blood and she RAN HER BLEEDING HAND back through my hair a few more times before noticing and applying a way too small bandaid. I was horrified.

28. When the barber is a little overeager.

(via Back2bach on Reddit)

He asked me to tilt my head back, just to check for any nose-hair. There was none, but his electric razor hit against the side my interior nasal passage and caused a blood vessel to erupt - spewing blood all over.

29. When you try to console yourself with "it's just hair."

(Luckily, it is!)

30. When all else fails.

It may not have as many players as League of Legends, Call of Duty or Minecraft, but when it comes to hours wasted among the computer-owning population of the world, the Civilization series is a strong contender for the title of "Video Gaming's Biggest Time-Suck." Now, Sid Meier's iconic history-spanning turn-based strategy series is back, and employers everywhere should mark October 21, 2016 down on their calendars as a day to look skeptically at workers' sick day requests. In fact, it's more than likely that many employees may come down with a mysterious flu that may last weeks. Surely, they'll feel better after just. One. More. Turn.

Only time will tell what Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump's legacies will be for the next generation, but they've already left their mark on babies who have been born in the past year. According to Cosmopolitan, the name "Donald," previously the 441st most popular baby name in the US, has plummeted to number 691. This is the lowest ranking of the name Donald since 1900. Sad!

Hillary didn't even make the top 1,000 most popular girls' names for 2015. Parents might be #withher, but they're not #withhername. Only 136 girls were given the name Hillary in 2015, and only 53 with the one L (but they're likely named after Hilary Duff).

This is a marked turnaround for the name, which most recently cracked the top 1000 in 2008. It's most recent peak in popularity came in 1992, when Bill was first elected. That year, it rose to #132. By '94, the name had fallen to 566, and remained on a steady decline since (these things are cyclical, of course). In 2007, Hillary ranked at 961, but Clinton likely gave it a boost during her first presidential run in '08, bringing it shooting up to #722. That effect has not been seen this time, and Hillary is at a historic low.

Whether it's related to her or not, Laura Wattenberg, founder of BabyNameWizard.com, told The Washington Post that "it's generally regarded that the drop in the name Hillary is one of the sharpest drops in popularity."

The names likely lost popularity not only because as presidential candidates, Hillary and Donald are polarizing figures, but also because (even for fans) everyone is likely so f***ing tired of hearing them being spoken on TV. The words "Hillary" and "Donald" are unavoidable if you watch the news, read the news, or just stumble upon the news. As a baby named Bernard might say, the American people are sick and tired of hearing about these damn names! 

Rachael Finch, an Australian model and former Miss Universe Australia 2009, has parents around the Internet raising up their (baby-proof) pitchforks after she told the Daily Telegraph that she ditches her two-year-old daughter Violet at her mother-in-law's house every weekend for some alone time with her husband.

“Every weekend, [Violet] goes to Mish’s mum’s house and we get our weekend to ourselves,” the 28-year-old mother said. “I think that’s incredibly healthy for the relationship. And on Sunday, when we pick her up, we have 100 percent energy back."

In response to criticism, Finch explained herself further on Instagram.

A Mother should never be made to feel they are not good enough for their child when they are doing everything they can to keep them safe, happy and loved. Only the parents of a child truly know what is best and should always have faith in their decisions.

I value dearly the relationship Violet has with her Grandmother and I believe this is one of the most important and influential relationships growing up. 
I work hard so that I can provide the best future for the amazing soul we have created. I won't ever stop believing in her or the strength of the family unit.

Unsurprisingly, people crapped hate all over Finch's Instagram like a flock of hovering, overfed pigeons.  

Some supported Finch and her husband, Michael Miziner.

Then there's this comment, which will make you want to have kids just so you can leave them with your parents.

Shit. Instagram just got real.