Hollywood's diversity issue is no laughing matter. Whether it's the whitewashing of other culture's stories by refusing to cast minorities as leads in films or men getting away with sexually assaulting women, Tinseltown is a place where privilege runs amok, and trying to do anything about it means an uphill battle.

Yet there's something undeniably funny about a guy like writer Aaron Sorkin, whose verbose TV shows and films (The West Wing, The Social Network, The Newsroom) project the air of smug know-it-all-ism, saying he never realized that Hollywood had these kinds of problems. Speaking with radio host and film critic Elvis Mitchell at the Writers Guild Festival on Saturday, he seemed altogether perplexed and openly shocked at how such things could happen.

“Are you saying that women and minorities have a more difficult time getting their stuff read than white men and you’re also saying that [white men] get to make mediocre movies and can continue on?” he asked the audience, according to Variety. “You’re saying that if you are a woman or a person of color, you have to hit it out of the park in order to get another chance?” he theorized.

Uh, yeah dude.

Oh, Aaron. At least he went on to ask how he could help the film industry make things more equitable and merit-based, but something tells us he's never going to be entirely woke.

James Corden often breaks the internet with his popular late-night segment Carpool Karaoke, but now he is trying to "break America" by introducing them Britain's "biggest man-band," Take That.

Take That band members Gary Barlow, Howard Donald and Mark Owen crossed the pond to join Corden in Los Angeles for this special edition of Carpool Karaoke that benefits UK's Red Nose Day. From discussing tea preferences to full English breakfasts, this is the British-est Carpool Karaoke ever.

Although Take That has been popular in the UK for decades, they are relatively unknown to American audiences. James Corden decided to remedy this by taking to the streets with the band to distribute free CDs and put on an impromptu concert with full choreography.

Between songs, Corden paused to have a true fan-boy moment. "I'll tell you what," said Corden with tears in his eyes. "For me as a Take That fan to be here now in this car is unreal for me."

A group of 1,163 pro-Beijing government officials elected Carrie Lam as Hong Kong's next chief executive, putting the residents of the 7.3 million person city further under the thumb of a mainland government they resent. You can read about it over at the New York Times.

But when you're done, come back here and read about the dick jokes.

Carrie Lam won the vote with 777 ballots cast in her favor. In Cantonese, the word "7" is slang for penis. Can you guess what "777" is slang for?

Erect penis!

Or it's just three penises in a row. There's also some confusion in English-language media over whether "777" refers to erections or impotency, with Mashable asserting the former and Bloomberg the latter. It seems like it's largely up to interpretation, with some just using the word as a stand-in for "stupid."

Rest assured, it has to do with the penis. Reporters heard the announcement and couldn't keep it together.

Social media was obviously brutal.

(Translation: #IReallyCongraulateYou #EverybodyWillHaveSuchADickChief #777 #ForeverAPenis")

According to the Hong Kong Free Press, Carrie Lam denied "appearing hesitant" as she heard the tally of votes.

"You reporters always exaggerate my facial expression."

Well, sure. But the dangers of the 7 are something Apple learned the hardway too, when their campaign for the iPhone 7—"this is 7"—translated to "this is penis."

Stay classy, Hong Kong protesters! Take it from Americans still deriding Trump for his tiny hands—it gets old, but if you do it long enough, it gets funny again.

On Sunday, Fox News, that reliable bastion of truth, tweeted that President Donald Trump spent the weekend working at the White House.

Which would be sort of impressive, for Donald Trump at least, except that according to several reports, the president actually spent at least part of the weekend playing golf.

Because of course he did.

Of course, people on Twitter couldn't stop laughing at the Fox News tweet.

You know, it's probably a good thing Donald Trump was playing golf instead of working this weekend. Best to keep him away from anything too important.

It's always cool when celebrities publicly celebrate each other, but Val Kilmer definitely crossed the line from complementary to creepy with this tweet rant about his The Missing co-star, CateBlanchett.

Yeesh, sure, the creepy selfie is pretty unnerving, but this was just the first in a long string of tweets that increasingly got weirder and weirder.

After that, Kilmer retweeted this Woman Crush Wednesday post about Blanchett, and then went back to tweeting about other things.

But lo and behold, Kilmer wasn't done singing Blanchett's praises quite yet.

Yikes yikes yikes. At that point, a Twitter user chimed in to suggest that all this is a little much. Kilmer didn't take the criticism well.

Mmm, okay then. Well, back to Val Kilmer tweeting about Cate Blanchett.

In Tuscon, Arizona a heroic fence caught an alleged school robber by the pants. As the Arizona man tried to escape by hopping its spikes, the fence did its civic duty, reached up, and pantsed him. A passerby took an excellent photo and posted it to Facebook—and we humbly request it become the guy's mugshot.

According to Tuscon News Now, a locksmith saw the supposed robber trying to break in, and the dude ran when they locked eyes. The rest is viral history: That underwear is hilarious.

(The guy was reportedly arrested.)

Tomi Lahren, the 24-year-old conservative rant-show host who carved out a career for saying offensive things, said something too damn offensive for her network: that women should have the right to choose.

Last week, in a segment on The View, between defending Donald Trump's (attempted) Muslim Ban and wiretapping claims, the firebrand dropped, "I’m for limited government, so stay out of my guns, and you can stay out of my body as well."

Glenn Beck, who created and runs TheBlaze,responded to this little glimmer of tolerance by suspending her show, and the Page Six reported on Sunday that the suspension.

Beck is making an example out of Lahren, like previously she was the only example people had when asked "What is even on 'TheBlaze'?

“Glenn is reminding the world of his conservative principles by sidelining Tomi after she insulted conservatives by calling them hypocrites,” a 'Beck insider' told Page Six.

“He just couldn’t sit by and watch as Tomi Lahren said there’s no way for conservatives to justify anything other than being pro-choice.”

Hmm. For all her ranting and ranting about how the left "can't tolerate" different views, she should have also taken a second to look at her fans and her boss.

Dr. Pimple Popper normally keeps her patients anonymous, but when they want to get the word out about something important, she's more than happy to use her huge online audience for good. Today's patient, who came in with three onion-like cysts in his back, told Dr. Lee all about his book Scout's Dishonor, a raw personal memoir about child abuse. And even though she knew her fans were just tuning in to see the onion, she gave him a platform to speak about his tragic history. Be warned—the audio on this clip is quite serious and may be triggering for other abuse victims.

The pop itself starts around 4:00.

This is only Part 1. We'll let you know when the next part goes live.

5. Tomi Lahren, because she was permanently banned from her old job.

Conservative pundit Tomi Lahren may have ended her own brief career as the face of young furious Republicans, and it's all because she made the grave mistake of having one different opinion. During a March 17 appearance on The View, Lahren said she is pro-choice, explaining, "I’m for limited government, so stay out of my guns, and you can stay out of my body as well."

While her supporters had no problem with her saying that Iran is a "terror training ground," or that the DNC paid for violent protests at Trump rallies, this time they decided she'd gone too far. Her bosses at TheBlaze, the conservative outlet started by Glenn Beck where she had been employed, suspended her indefinitely.

And if you thought that was just a slap on the wrist to get her to toe the party line, you don't know Beck. Over the weekend, sources confirmed that Lahren has now been permanently banned from TheBlaze. One insider told Page Six:

Glenn is reminding the world of his conservative principles by sidelining Tomi after she insulted conservatives by calling them hypocrites … He just couldn’t sit by and watch as Tomi Lahren said there’s no way for conservatives to justify anything other than being pro-choice.

Some feel that this is part of Glenn Beck's attempt to win back fans who feel that he himself has gone soft on his conservative credentials. Readership of TheBlaze is way down since he appeared on Full Frontal with Samantha Bee. So if you thought this story was a sign of the conservative movement doing some serious soul-searching, don't worry. It's just pundits selling each other out to survive.

4. Kevin Hart, because he got called out by Dave Chappelle.

If you haven't opened Netflix in the past week, you might not know that the streaming service just dropped two new standup specials by comedy legend Dave Chappelle. In one of them, he tells a brutally honest story about taking his star-struck son to meet Kevin Hart backstage at a show, and how angry he was to be upstaged by someone he "didn't realize" was so successful.

You can't help but feel for both of them. Chappelle is seeing a younger comic enjoy the same status he had back in his "I'm Rick James, bitch" years, while Hart is being played for laughs by one of his favorite comedians of all time.

But while Hart may privately have responded to the clip by weeping into a golden pillow in one of his 800 mansions, he publicly handled it with grace.

He even kept his cool when trolls tried to use the bit to attack him.

He might mean "there's money and success out here for BOTH of us." There aren't many comics who will ever hit the level these two guys are at. Which explains why they're so comfortable being compared to each other. Owning a fleet of Lamborghinis will do that.

3. A woman who blamed her car crash on Bigfoot.

A woman from Tensed, Idaho who hit a deer with her car gave the Latah Country Sheriff's Office a unique explanation: she said she was distracted by Bigfoot. According to a report from Pullman Radio, the 50-year-old suffered a minor neck injury in the crash, which she immediately reported to the authorities.

Right about now, you might be thinking that she mistook the deer for a sasquatch. You would be so wrong. According to her statement, Bigfoot was CHASING the deer. She was so startled by the eight-foot-tall "hairy beast," she didn't swerve to avoid its prey.

Although it's easy to be skeptical of her story, we choose to see the positive. If Bigfoot is real, this means he got a free lunch. And as environmentalists, we support that.

2. A guy whose vanity license plate was taken away because of his unfortunate last name.

An irate motorist from Nova Scotia, Canada is furious at the Registry of Motor Vehicles for revoking the vanity license plate he's owned for more than 25 years. A family heirloom, he bought the plate as a gift for his father, and has proudly displayed it on his own car since his father's death in the 1990s. But now, the CBC reports that the government has revoked his plate because it bears a "socially unacceptable slogan." That "slogan" is his last name, Grabher.

Lorne Grabher is going public with his struggle against Motor Vehicles. He spent his life teaching his children not to be ashamed of their name, just as his father taught him. But now, the fat cats are telling him in writing that his name is offensive. He told the CBC:

I was taken aback. How can you say my name is a slogan when it is not? … Where does the province of Nova Scotia and the government of Nova Scotia get the right to discriminate against a person's name?

The Department of Transportation responded to a CBC inquiry with the following statement:

A complaint was received outlining how some individuals interpret [the name] as misogynistic and promoting violence against women … With no way to denote that it is a family name on the plate, the department determined it was in the public's best interest to remove it from circulation.

But that just made Grabher even angrier. He, and others, feel that the sudden decision to revoke his plate after so many years may be related to US President Donald Trump's now-infamous comments about grabbing women. But Grabher has a response to that too:

Donald Trump is a totally different person. He's ignorant. He doesn't care about anybody and I shouldn't be put in a class like him.

You said it, Mr. Grabher!

1. A Florida man who was arrested for eating pancakes in the middle of a busy intersection.

Yes, this is exactly what it sounds like.

A young man in Lakeland, Florida is facing his day in court after the local police saw photos of him sitting shirtless in the middle of an intersection, eating pancakes off a small TV tray. Baffled police officers posted the story on Facebook as a deterrent against anyone else who might be thinking about committing this very specific crime.

After a concerned citizen shared a video of the suspect and his flapjacks on the Lakeland PD Facebook page, some of his friends immediately outed him as 21-year-old Kiaron Thomas, who lives 100 yards from that very intersection. Police interviewed him, and he admitted he pulled the stunt as a prank (ON WHO?).

Thomas was charged with Placing an Obstruction in the Roadway and Disrupting the Free Flow of Traffic. His court date has been set for April 25. Some Facebook commenters complained, stating that eating pancakes is a victimless crime. The police responded with another photo to prove them wrong.

When will people learn that eating pancakes is a privilege, not a right?

A middle school student named James got the shock of his life when he unexpectedly met Nancy Cartwright, the woman who voices the iconic potty-mouthed 10-year-old Bart Simpson on The Simpsons. It took a few minutes for James to realize who we was talking to, but once he did, he did have a cow, man.

Spotted Cow Entertainment uploaded the video of Nancy Cartwright meeting the 13-year-old.

"I'm 10 and I got to Springfield Elementary," said Cartwright in her Bart voice. When the teen still didn't catch on, she said "I'm Bart Simpson!"

"That's a really good impression," responded the perplexed middle schooler, before having his priceless "Ay Caramba!" moment.

Cartwright was about to drive off in her Tesla (of course we noticed) but stopped to sign a Simpsons bookmark for James. Next time, it might be better to open with "I'm Bart Simpson, who the hell are you?" to avoid any confusion.

Over the weekend, a tweet was posted showing a sad-looking bulldog, who was supposedly bummed out after no other dogs showed up to his birthday party.

The tweet gave Twitter users a lot of feelings, and it quickly went viral.

Twitter user @NasMaraj, the original poster of the sad doggo, even tweeted out a poll to see if people would bring their dogs to the ~next party~ he threw for little Doug.

People overwhelmingly said yes.

Here's the catch, though: The story about this sad little dog and his sad little party is completely fake.

@NasMaraj, aka 17-year-old Nasiir Williams, told Buzzfeed that he tweeted the photos when he "was really bored one day." Inspired by the viral stories of Paw Paw and the pit bull no one wanted to pet on Halloween, Williams found the photos through Google image search, and then posted them on his Twitter. He added that he didn't expect his fake story to go this far.

Williams says he doesn't actually have a dog because his parents won't let him. He really wants one, though.

"I don't know how long I can keep it up before people find my address and forcefully send gifts," Williams told Buzzfeed. "I feel kinda bad."

Someone better tell Twitter there's not actually going to be a giant dog party in Atlanta, Georgia.

Never trust the internet, guys.

In today's creepy Uber news, a Redditor shared a screenshot of a text conversation from her driver. She had gotten an email saying she may have left something in the car, so she reached out. Oh sweet beautiful lord:

This dude's either the biggest Taco Bell purist or an unrepentant creep using his job to make women feel really uncomfortable. Although people have been getting really, really into Taco Bell mild sauce lately, I'm inclined to put this man in blog-jail for creepiness anyway. Once you pick them up, don't try to pick them up.

On Sunday, United Airlines was all anybody could talk about on Twitter after the airline refused to allow young girls on a flight from Denver to Minneapolis because they were wearing leggings. If you don't know, leggings are just tight pants, and also, nobody should be staring down little girls, anyway.

United defended their position on Twitter ...

... and celebrities took to Twitter to defend the girls.

Stars on social media pointed out the grossness of policing the clothes of children.

And joked about the outfits that they've "gotten away with."

Seth Rogen pitched the airline a new slogan.

William Shatner was moved to stand up and switch up his own style.

Some even called for a boycott of United Airlines.

A certain celebrity known as Delta Airlines weighed in, taking Leggingsgate to its logical conclusion.

Half the country is annoyed at Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner and they don't even have to live near them. Now imagine how annoying it would be if they were your neighbors, bringing with them all the Secret Service agents with whom they regularly travel. According to the Washington Post, it's as bad as you might expect.

Apparently Trump and Kushner's neighbors in their new D.C. neighborhood started to see "No Parking" signs cropping up, making space for the Secret Service cars. Rhona Friedman, Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner's next-door neighbor, told the Washington Post that she was initially welcoming to the couple. But then two more "No Parking" signs appeared, this time directly in front of her house, and enough was enough. “I started screaming,” Friedman said.

There are now metal barricades along the street where they live, meaning pedestrians can't use the sidewalks next to the Trump/Kushner house. There are also reportedly Secret Service agents all around their house, having loud conversations and "even changing their shirts in public view," the Washington Post reports.

One resident, Marti Robinson, told the publication, “They’ve completely taken over the whole street—as if they have the authority! . . . We were a nice, quiet residential community and we’ve become a neighborhood where people take pictures.” In an email to the mayor regarding the situation, Robinson wrote that all the Secret Service activity has "truly ruined my peaceful enjoyment of my house. It is every bit as disruptive as if a very active business was allowed to come into this residential neighborhood."

Wow. It's almost enough to make you appreciate your clog-dancing upstairs neighbor. Almost.

Cuba Gooding Jr. sparked a widespread internet outrage on Sunday after he lifted up Sarah Paulson's dress at PaleyFest in Los Angeles.

At a panel discussion on American Horror Story, Sarah Paulson turned to greet co-star Kathy Bates as she walked on stage. Cuba Gooding Jr. then bent down to lift up her dress. (Come on, dude. Seriously?)TMZ posted a video of the incident:

TMZ reports that Paulson and Gooding Jr. seemed playful with each other throughout the rest of the PaleyFest event, but people on the internet were not so amused by his actions:

Neither Paulson nor Gooding Jr. has addressed the incident on social media.

Hey, how have you been sleeping lately? Good? Cool, well not anymore, because this mugshot of some dude in full Joker makeup will probably keep you up at night.

According to Winchester Police Department spokesperson Commissioner Gordon Jennifer Hall, several concerned citizens called 911 and reported seeing a man dressed like The Joker carrying a sword. Thirty-one-year-old Jeremy Putman was later arrested and charged with wearing a mask in public, a felony that could result in up to a year in jail.

Yeah, that is a thing you can actually be arrested for!

Putman is being held on a $2,000 secured bond.

Better fire up the bat symbol. You know, just in case.