In an effort to keep her spirits up after breaking up with Tyga (and keep all the focus on herself), Kylie Jenner Snapchatted her sister Khloé Wednesday night, and they proceeded to have the most over-produced conversation ever. It was uncomfortable as hell.

They asked super girl-talky questions:

They dove deep into their narcissism:

 And they reminded us just how young Kylie really is:

When Khloé asked her love-sick sister what she is watching on TV, and Kylie responded, "I'm a little embarrassed to say, Khloé, but I'm watching Disney Channel."

TYGA YOUR EX IS WATCHING THE DISNEY CHANNEL. SHE WAS TOO YOUNG.

Ryan Gosling was on The Late Show Thursday with Russell Crowe to promote their new movie The Nice Guys. They took a brief break from the regular late night interview to talk about Gosling's dear mother. It turns out she was very much not a fan of Colbert's former comedic persona on The Colbert Report. As is the case with moms, she disliked the real Colbert because she associated him with a fake character he played on TV. But then she learned she had something in common with Colbert: they're both Lord of the Rings nerds.

That changed everything. Gosling's mom sent along an adorable mom note with a trivia question for Colbert. Guests on the show who are also LOTR fans have previously tried, and failed, to stump Colbert on trivia about the books. But this time, Colbert couldn't answer it.

Technically it would be impossible to answer that question unless he had a photographic memory. Let's call it a victory for Gosling and his mom anyway, because it was nearly two minutes of not having to hear Russell Crowe talk.

Redditor Haedoxic was driving around, parked their car, and returned to the vehicle to find a critique of their (presumably bad) parking job. Leaving letters on parked cars a beloved institution—a fun way to cover your ass after hitting the bumper or to take a precaution against theft—and this one blindly takes the genre into a new direction.

Helen Keller jokes are like the basis of middle school humor, easy puns that feel super edgy when you're 12. The genre still lives, with a Helen Keller Twitter account raking in 781,000 followers and getting a lot of RTs.

Even if they're hacky, you can see that Helen Keller jokes have no sign of stopping, seeing as there are a couple in this very sentence. 

Reddit user throwaway4620048486 has blown up the Internet by posting the unbelievable multi-part story of his long lost brother, whom his parents had told him went missing and disappeared. It turns out, his brother had never gone missing, but chose to leave because his parents rejected him for being gay. What followed was a decades-long saga of deception and redemption.

The story begins with the memory of the last time he saw his brother:

I'm trying to write this in a way so that no one will be able to research and find out who I am (or my brother is). But it's the Internet and everyone's a super sleuth.

My brother went missing years ago. And when I say "missing," I mean that his case was declared one of those "creepy unsolved mysteries." It was on the news. I distinctly remember my parents interviewing for the news in our living room.

I think I know what happened to him.

I was very young when he went missing. I barely remember him, but I do remember that I loved him a lot. He would pull me around our block in a wagon. Most kids his age didn't do that.

The days before he disappeared, I remember him staying home and babysitting me. I stayed in my room and played Nintendo 64. Throughout the day, a guy came over. I remember him. He was older, almost our dad's age. My brother made me go into my room whenever I heard the doorbell.

Later, after the guy left, my brother would ask me not to say anything about the guy. With my brain only being focused on video games and extra dessert at that age, I agreed. I didn't care, nor did I comprehend the gravity of the situation.

The day before he disappeared, I remember the older guy coming over. I was in the kitchen and remember looking up and seeing him kiss my brother. They hugged. They didn't care that I saw them. The older guy waved at me and I waved back, then I kept watching cartoons.

I fell asleep on the couch and woke up to my brother whispering outside our front door. "Don't worry, he's asleep," he said.

The older guy said something I couldn't hear. Then my brother said something I couldn't make out, but I made out the words "visit them" or maybe he said "visit him"? Either way, I know the word 'visit' was in his sentence. The man raised his voice and said no. Then I heard "plan" and "city." Then I fell asleep again.

The next morning--the day he disappeared--my parents were at work. My brother was acting very strange. I remember he kept checking the clock. In the afternoon, I remember him picking me up and asking me if I wanted to go in the wagon. I was too hooked on Nintendo 64 and said no. He almost begged me and I said no again. Then he told me he had to run to our neighbor's house for something, I don't even remember what he said. I said okay. He reminded me to not open the door for anyone, only mom and dad. I shouted at him "OKAY!" because Super Mario was getting on my fucking nerves and he wasn't helping.

He gave me a hug and told me he loved me and left. He never came back.

It took the perspective of being an adult himself to understand the memory through a different lens. Plus the receipt of a mystery gift:

All these years--decades--later and I think he was in love with that man. I know he was. The memories randomly came flooding back to me earlier, I'm not quite sure why. But it has been taking over my thoughts lately. I can't sleep because I keep thinking about it.

I think my brother left with that man and they ran away together. Or maybe something worse happened. But I don't think that's the case.

My freshman year of college, I was part of a sports team that got national recognition. I remember my team's picture was on ESPN and with our university's name. A few days later, I got mail at my dorm. It was a gift basket. I thought it was from my parents, so I didn't read the card. I threw it away immediately and ate what was in it, but it was nothing but candy. Nerds, jolly ranchers, Tootsie Rolls and Hershey's Kisses. I called my dad and thanked him for the gift basket and he said he didn't send one, neither did mom.

Then I got to thinking: all of those candies were what I used to eat as a kid. Literally all I ate for the earliest years of my life were those candies. I tried to find the card, but I couldn't. Then I began to think about how my brother would wheel me in the wagon to the gas station close to our house so I could get candy after dinner, even though it was a punishable-by-death "no-no" from mom.

He received something else unmarked that he suspected might be from his brother, though the reason for his disappearance still baffled him:

Months later, during Christmas, I got an unmarked Christmas card. The only thing written on it was a :) smiley. Since then, I've heard nothing. No one I know sent that card. I have never responded.

I wonder, every day, if he's out there. I have never told anyone this. When the police asked me what happened that day, I told them that he went to the neighbor's because that's all I remembered, honestly.

It destroyed my parents. My mom became addicted to pain killers and my dad has had three extra-marital affairs (which, I know this tragedy is no way an excuse to cheat, but it sure didn't help). It has ruined our family, and maybe my brother knows what he did. Maybe he regrets it and knows he can't come back home.

But if I could see him today, I would just want to tell him that he is always welcome in my home. I love you so much, brother. We have so much catching up to do. Please come home. Please.

After piecing these clues together, he decided to confront his parents about the true circumstances of his brother's disappearance:

These past few weeks have been insane. I posted on here before....my brother went missing a long time ago. I thought he ran away from home. Long story short, I got into contact with some detectives that our family has known since my brother went missing. When I started asking questions, they told me that my brother was no longer on any missing persons registry. When I asked what that meant, they told me that he was removed per my parent(s) request.

I asked my parents--my dad, actually. My dad ignored me. My mom told me my brother is alive and okay ("as far as she knows"). They found my brother years ago--a very, very long time ago--and found out he was living with another man. He's gay, and it disgusted my parents. He tried reaching out to them. They told him they didn't want anything to do with him and that I didn't remember him and wouldn't want to see him.....

Naturally, he was shocked and angered to learn that he'd been deceived about his brother:

I went ballistic. My parents weren't fazed by it. They sincerely hate my brother for who he is--for being gay. They kept him a secret from me all my fucking life. My brother missed the birth of his nephew, he missed my wedding, graduations, EVERYTHING. just because of my parents. they lied to me.

I've been able to get a phone number and contact information from police officers. my brother left it all open in case anyone from our family wanted to contact him. i still can't work up the nerve to call him. the address i have for him is across the fucking country. but he's alive. my brother is alive. i'm drunk as fuck right now because i can't deal with any of this. i haven't talked to my parents in weeks and i never plan on speaking to them again. not for what they've done to me, or my brother.

this is real and it happened. it happened--it is happening right now. i dont know how to process this at all. my parents let me blieve my brother was dead or kidnapped forever, when in reality he just ran away and when he wanted to come back they disowned him

im fucking crying right now. how could you do that? fuck you, God. fuck you christians and jesus. idont even know i'm so fucking--i'm sorry

Thankfully, he decided to see if the contact information he had for his brother was still accurate. But it took a lot of courage, and a lot of scotch, to actually take that final step:

The day after I made my last post, I woke up and called into work. I told my wife (who is essentially my confidant and I tell her everything) the whole story. She wasn’t really surprised; she’s not a fan of my parents much. But like many of you, she told me to call the number I was given for my brother immediately. She insisted on it. She took herself and my son out for a day together so I could be alone to talk with him.

I dialed the number about seven times before I actually pressed the “call” button. It started ringing and I hung up. Then I got frustrated at myself and called the number back. It rang and rang and I got a voicemail, but it was the automated voice, not anyone else’s. I didn’t leave a voicemail. I thought the whole thing was ridiculous. I called my wife and told her to come home and she refused until I had talked to someone& on the other end of the phone.

About an hour of pacing and drinking two glasses of scotch at 1 o’clock in the afternoon, I called the number again. It rang three times. I panicked. I hung up. But this time, the number was calling me back. I swear to whatever God(s) above, I thought my heart was going to stop. I almost threw up right there. I answered the call.

Not surprisingly, he didn't know what to say when he heard his brother's voice for the first time in years:

Me being a creepy ass, the first thing I said after decades of not seeing him and thinking he was dead, I blurted: “I got your number.”

He asked me who I was and what I wanted. I said, “It’s me.” There was a really long pause. I thought the call had dropped. Then I heard him tell someone to turn the radio down and roll the window up. The sound of wind stopped… and then he asked me my name. I told him and he said that I was lying. I told him I got his number from the missing children’s network and detectives. I heard him gasp. He asked me what color shoelaces he wore to a picnic when we were kids, and I remember my mom getting mad at his orange laces with blue shoes. It was the last time we were together as a family.

I could tell he was crying. The first thing he asked me was: “Where are you?” and I told him I lived a few hours away from home. Without hesitating, he told me, “I’m coming.”

After one phone call, the wheels were in motion. It was as if the two brothers had never been separated:

He went straight to the airport without any luggage, bought a plane ticket, and flew straight to me. We stayed on the phone with each other the whole time. When he was walking through the gate, I knew who he was right away. He is middle-aged; salt and pepper hair, muscular. He looks just like our dad, only better. I know if I told him that, that would make him mad.

I literally pushed an old lady out of the way and I just hugged him. He’s about two inches taller than me. He was able to pick me up. He was crying, I was crying. I was having a breakdown. We went to a bar at the airport. He wouldn’t let me out of his sight. He kept holding onto my arm. He kept telling me how unreal it all was. He apologized to me. He kept crying, telling me he felt horrible. I told him to forget everything and tell me about his life.

He’s married. His husband is a doctor—a pediatric oncologist. They live in the Pacific Northwest. They have two children—girls, 12 and 8. He works as a legal consultant and has his own firm. He has an amazing life. He told me that he thought I hated him and wanted nothing to do with him. We sat at the bar for hours. Literal hours. I think we sat for about six hours before I begged him to come home and meet my wife.

We got home, and my wife was a mess. She hugged him and insisted he stay with us. At this point, his husband was going insane and kept calling him. He had no idea what was going on. He thought he had eloped or something. It was crazy for a couple of days until everything was explained and out in the open.

My son and my brother were like two peas in a pod. Honestly, I never wanted children. My son was an amazing accident, but I’m not good with kids. I’m always afraid I’m going to break them. But my brother is a pro. Kids love him.

That new fun uncle decided to stay for a while to get to know his brother and family. It's hard to tell if this Reddit user will ever be able to forgive his parents for the saga:

He stayed with us for two weeks. And in two weeks, everything about my life changed. His husband and two daughters flew in to stay with us. My brother-in-law and my two nieces. My family. They were my family. They are my family.

My brother wants my wife and I to move to be closer to him. My wife is on board. I work as a professor at a university and have already started to send out feelers to see if there are any open positions, and I’ve found one that is actually tenured and higher pay.

I do not plan on forgiving my parents, but my brother still loves them. He went by their house and knocked on the door. My father shut the door in his face. My mother gave him a hug and told him to take care of himself. Then she shut him out. I can’t forgive them for that. I have no reason to stay close to them. I want to be with my family. I want to make up for all the lost time.

It’s 2am right now and I’m drinking a tall glass of scotch and grading papers. My beautiful, wonderful, smart, amazing wife is asleep on the couch. She likes to watch me grade papers. My son is asleep in his room cuddled up with all the stuffed animals his uncle brought him. And I’m here, so happy, so fulfilled knowing that my family has grown and doubled in size so suddenly. My heart is happy. I am so happy right now, Reddit. I am so happy.

Every family has its problems, drama, and histories, but this is enough for several lifetimes. It sounds like these two brothers have years to catch up on, though it's almost like they were never apart.

Former Laguna Beach actress Kristin Cavallari may have faded from the spotlight after the finale of her show about 10 years ago, but she has definitely been keeping busy by raising her three children, launching her jewelry line, and talking to Us Weekly about what she feels most passionately about—chokers. 

According to the magazine, she even shared her "fool proof formula" for wearing a choker. Fool proof formula? Don't you just put the thing around your neck and go about your day? Share your secret, Kristin!

For some people, black chokers are kind of crazy. But I love them. With jeans, booties and a T-shirt, you throw a cool choker on, and you’re good to go!

Oh wait, so you do just put the thing around your neck and go about your day. OK, guess plenty of people knew that "fool proof formula" all along. Anyways, Cavallari's revamped jewelry line, Emerald Duv, has plenty of choker options like this "Gold Bar Festival Wrap" choker, because when you are out in the middle of a desert watching a music festival, you're going to want something tightly constricting your throat.

Or maybe you'd prefer this $38.00 piece of rope.

Or this $42.00 black lace choker that looks like it would be keeping a girl's head from falling off in a scary story.

If you think the whole choker craze is just a passing trend, Cavallari disagrees. She told Us, "We pay attention to the trend forecast, but we have more than just the trendy pieces. There are pieces that will be in your closet forever."

So if you're looking for a choker necklace to pass down to your grandchildren one day, check out Cavallari's shop, Emerald Duv.

Just remember, this is the same woman who tried to sell you fake clip-in bangs. You have been warned!

On the new song "THat Part" by Schoolboy Q, Kanye West has a guest verse in which he raps "Wifey gonna kill me, she the female O.J." while worrying how his wife Kim Kardashian will react when she finds out he went to a strip club. As a reminder, Kardashian's father, Robert Kardashian, was O.J. Simpson's close friend and lawyer and literally had has kids call him "Uncle O.J." and also maybe allegedly disposed of evidence for O.J. Simpson on the day of the murder of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman. Just an interesting, weird factoid about the family Kanye married into!

You can listen to the song in Spotify.

Kim Kardashian has avoided talking publicly about her relationship with O.J. Simpson, but her mother, Kris Jenner, has said she strongly believes that Simpson was guilty of the murders. It's nice to see West in agreement with her. Bill Cosby, though? That guy is totally "innocent !!!!!!!!," says Kanye West.

Over at Jezebel, writer Bobby Finger uncovered something fascinating and a bit sad: that even though Margot Robbie, actress from The Wolf of Wall Street and the upcoming Suicide Squad, now says in interviews that she is 25 years old, was once referred to in an article from 2008 as 23, which would make her now 30.  

If Robbie is indeed lying about her age, she would join a long line of Hollywood stars to have done the same. For "stars," please read "women and Michael Jackson," because that's mostly it. Recently, Rebel Wilson said she was 29 when she was actually 36, Jessica Chastain said she was 30 when she was actually several years older, and Beyoncé insists she's 34 when she's actually the ageless goddess Coyolxauhqui.

But there's a twist! Later in the day, Finger updated the article because a Twitter user sent him articles from around the same time referring to Robbie as a 17-year-old, which means... everything checks out? Unless it's still a conspiracy? Can the U.N. launch some kind of investigation here?

One thing we can all agree on: Margot Robbie is one of those women who men think look really attractive and women think look kind of mean. Right???

This weekend, do not simply be a party "animal," be a party bear. A party animal just drinks too much, talks too loudly, and probably leaves a drool stain on the couch. A party bear, however, lives life to the fullest, rubbing its back on the ground of life and opening its mouth wide to sprinklers, both literal and metaphorical. Here is your party bear inspiration:

This video was taken at Triple D Ranch, a ranch in Montana that raises animals for use in photos and movies, which helps explain all the loving chatter in the video.

Kit Harington went on the Tonight Show on May 13 and talked about, among many things, how difficult it was to keep in the spoilers he knew about season six of Game of Thrones (spoilers in this article, by the way). There were certain people Kit let on about his mostly-obvious resurrection—he reassured his parents, for one, that was not an unemployed actor—but he maintained his straight-faced denials to friends and coworkers alike. Except, that is, for one police officer, who made Jon Snow an offer no random fan on the street could equal:

On your way, Lord Commander.

The drop was the king of candy before a wartime brass shortage ate all the machines, but it's not hard to see why they were so popular. Elaborate, handmade, and tasty, after watching this video, you'll want nothing more than to eat an amber drop hot off the presses.

Today, you may occasionally have a cough drop when you're ill or grab a handful of cherry drops while you wait for a haircut, but drops no longer dominate the candy scene. Furthermore, modern drops are like large, smooth pills, when once drops came in a glorious variety of shapes and sizes. Check out this short film to see how it used to be done, before large machines just injected sugar into molds.

The Internet: sometimes it just decides to do stuff, like have everyone all post baby skunk pictures at the same time. That's what happened today after redditor Proteon posted this pretty perfect picture of a small baby skunk curled up such a tight ball you'd think it was waiting to be thrown by a Pokémon trainer:

It even came complete with a cute story:

Story: The mom was hit by a car, we didn't know until the babies under the porch were not well two days later. I took this one and fed her puppy formula every few hours for two days; took her to work with me, kept her in a cooler full of my shirts in the shade. Day three her eyes looked great and she was active so I did some homework and found a local vet who rehabilitates squirrels and skunks and shipped her off to rehab . I was sad to see her go but I can't be raising no skunk.

Edit: Baby skunks bark and growl like tiny dogs - she would yap when I picked her up and growl until I let her smell my face. Cutest thing about her. I have a few more pics but I won't be able to upload them until tonight when I get home.

Unsurprisingly, people really enjoyed this photo of a baby skunk. It's a cute photo. But that's not unusual. People like pictures all the time, especially cute pictures of baby animals. Often times, folks will even talk a big game about posting similar pictures. This was posted in response to Proteon's story:

But today, people went one step further. Today, people actually walked the walk.

Before the morning was over on the East Coast, a new Baby Skunks subreddit was started, and hundreds of people joined and many submitted new baby skunk photos.

For a few glorious, stinky, adorable hours, the hottest thing on the entire social network was baby skunks. 

It's not hard to see why.

Head over to /r/BabySkunks for more.

Police Chief Melvin Tennyson of Groveland, FL was brought low by the power of Internet justice this week, forced to write himself and pay a $45 parking ticket after a local citizen posted photos of the chief's parking talents to Facebook.

Recently, the Groveland PD had been issuing tickets to homeowners for leaving their cars at the end of the driveway in such a way that it would block the sidewalk. Needless to say, this was quite irritating to homeowners, who felt like they had the right to park all the way down their driveway, even if pedestrians have to walk around. In this atmosphere of community irritation, the time was ripe for a photo to go viral of the police chief disobeying his own department's initiative.

After resident David Bires made that post on May 10, neighbors quickly took notice, criticizing the chief for disregarding everyone's least-favorite new rule. Fortunately, for Groveland and for community-police relations everywhere, Chief Tennyson acted quickly, uploading this response the next day:

There you have it, folks. The police can respond quickly to concerns...if you catch them red-handed and post it in public and people actually notice. Good job, Chief Tennyson, and stay off the sidewalk.

Rapper (and Degrassi star) Drake did double-duty on Saturday Night Live on May 14, and utilized both his music and comedy chops for an emotional monologue. 

In the vast weird place that is the Internet, Drizzy is known as much for his memes as he is for his music. The Canadian artist has Internet access, and apparently he's seen the Photoshop action around his dad dancing in "Hotline Bling," and more recently, Sad Drake sitting on Toronto's CN Tower on the Views cover.

Whipping out his Rihanna impression (and staring into the camera with the puppy dog eyes he usually reserves for girls who used to call him on his cell phone), Drake croons a powerful song to show that he contains multitudes.

You have to see it to meme it. 

According to the setup of this Saturday Night Live bit, rumor has it that in the explosive wake of Beyoncé's Lemonade, Jay Z summoned a secret rappers' meeting to get marital advice from other famous hip-hop performers. Luckily for us, Jay Pharoah was there to witness the Tidal wave of rapper wisdom on Diddy's above-ground submarine. This set is obviously a follow-up to Pharoah's impression of a meeting of black comedians. Pharoah is by far SNL's best impressionist right now (Darrell Hammond only drops by to do Trump, and isn't technically in the cast anymore), and recaps what Jay, T.I., 50 Cent, Will Smith, Lil Wayne, Nicki Minaj and more had to say about Bey.

Much to the chagrin of Real Drake, Pharoah brought out his Fake Drake, tapping into the nasal tones. Oh yeah.

Drake sang in his monologue about how he and his extremely expressive face are sick and tired of being disrespected by the Internet meme-ing his every move. Drizzy also brought that sensitive persona backstage, where the drama eclipsed everything on the show. The sensitive, kind Canadian felt disrespected by the entire SNL crew, from the cleaning lady to his fellow Jew from the 6ix, Lorne Michaels. It was a rude awakening for Drake that New York comedians not as polite as Torontonians—and if you disrespek Drake, you'll be "sorey" you were born. 

Next time you see Drake, don't you dare move his hat. 

Also, shout out to Josh Gad? 

An unusual number of Guinness World Records are held by people who have multiple Guinness World Records, and Ashrita Furman is no exception—he has 191 records after adding "most blowtorches extinguished with tongue in one minute" to his trophy cabinet. Normally, Guinness discourages people from attempting dangerous records, but somehow this one has survived. This is odd, since shoving your face directly into blue-hot fire over and over seems to carry with it some level of risk. Specifically, the risk that you might move an inch in the wrong direction and melt your face off, or forget to wet your tongue enough and turn it to ash. 

But obviously, that was deemed an acceptable level of risk because here's Ashrita doing it on camera. Try to count how many he puts out while holding your own tongue to comfort it.

Forty seven. Forty seven blowtorches. With his tongue. 

The Santagato family is weird, primarily because they're all a good-looking bunch of seemingly fun siblings who can sit down at a table together and play an entire game without starting a fight. Maybe that's because the game they were playing, in which they split into teams and took turns putting in dental cheek retractors (hopefully, they each had their own) and trying to make their partner guess the weird phrases they had to say. 

The sounds are funny, the phrases are bizarre, and their laughter is infectious. Spend some time with a family that actually gets along for once:

A building storing a large amount of fireworks caught on fire this week in Southhampton, England, and it went exactly as you'd think: a lot of fireworks exploded in the process. This isn't the most insane fireworks display in the world—there was that time Texas police set off 20,000 pounds of illegal fireworks, or that time a fireworks factory exploded in Colombia—but it's the closest thing those benighted Brits will ever get to the Fourth of July.