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Donald Trump to get his very own episode of 'Law and Order: SVU.'

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Law and Order: SVU is planning to air an episode based on the 2005 video released last week in which Trump bragged about sexually assaulting women.

Now in it's 18th season, SVU has a long history of ripping stories from the headlines, including episodes based on Beyoncé and Jay-Z's elevator fight and Netflix's Making a Murderer, so it was only a matter of time before they tappedthis week's biggest news story.

According to The Hollywood Reporter,"in the episode, Gary Cole (Veep) will play a politician whose campaign goes haywire when several women go public with damaging accusations."

Back in September, SVU showrunner Rick Eid told THR that they had already planned on as story "involving some sort of brash demagogue with political ambitions." It looks like the recorded audio of Trump saying "grab them by the pussy" was enough to push them over the edge.

Or, maybe the show is keeping a close eye on SVU actor Ice-T's Twitter account.

The episode will be called "Unstoppable," and will air just two weeks before the election on October 28th.

Get him, Olivia.


Raccoon swipes phone and records his daring getaway.

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Guy Williams, a student at Bellarmine University, was filming an adorable raccoon on his phone when the little trash panda snatched his cell and ran off with it. Luckily, the epic chase was being recorded the entire time the furry bandit was at large.

Prior to the theft, Williams named the raccoon Stanley—a name he started yelling in an A Streetcar Named Desire-like fashion as he searched the campus for his stolen phone.

Williams told BuzzFeed News that he finally got his phone back when the little guy ended up dropping it. Immediately after retrieving it, he did what any other 19-year-old would do and posted the video on Twitter.

This is what the internet was made for, folks.

Sony is appealing to the youths with an animated emoji movie.

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As I get older, I find myself growing less and less in touch with what "the kids" are into. The latest in the string of things I don't understand is a new animated movie about the lives of emojis.

That's right, folks. Sony Pictures Animation is releasing a film about emojis called Emojimovie: Express Yourself. According to a press release, the movie “unlocks the never-before-seen secret world inside your smartphone. Hidden within the messaging app is Textopolis, a bustling city where all your favorite emojis live, hoping to be selected by the phone’s user.”

Of course they couldn't leave out poop emoji.

Wow. Sure you don't want to watch The Lion King, kids? No? You'd rather watch a movie about Gene the "exuberant emoji who was born without a filter and is bursting with multiple expressions" who's determined to become a "normal" emoji with only one face? Okay, that's cool. Live your truth. Who am I to stop you?

The film features Gene, who is voiced by T.J. Miller, embarking on an "epic app-venture" with his friend Hi-5 (voiced by James Corden) and a code breaker emoji named Jailbreak (voiced by Broad City's Ilana Glazer). They travel through all of the different apps on a smartphone in search of the code that will fix Gene.

The film is slated to be released on August 11, 2017. Think I may have to sit this one out. If anyone needs me, I'll be over here being un-hip. Have fun, kids.

Article 18

10 terrifying stories about haunted houses people swear are true.

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October is the best month for all things scary and what's scarier than living in a house that's haunted? Especially by a ghost not paying rent, because that's some bullshit. Fair's fair. Anyway, here are some seriously spooky stories* from the folks at Reddit about houses they live in or have lived in along with other things…not quite human.

1. CarChaseCity had a special ghost nanny.

My mom's convinced that the house I lived in until I was in kindergarten was haunted. Apparently the previous owner was a nice old lady and she died in the house before we bought it. She has a lot of stories about hearing doors creek, voices, and footsteps in the hallway before my sister and I were old enough to walk. Pretty standard ghost stuff. But the weirdest part she talked about is that sometimes in the middle of the night when no one was in my room, my mobile would go off and my crib would be rocking when my mom walked in and I'd be dead asleep. She thinks that when I was upset in the night the ghost of the old lady would help calm me down in the night.

2. Abgleich's wife also had a ghost nanny, but this one wore a trench coat.

My in-laws tell a story about how when my wife was a baby she was terribly fussy, especially at night. One night after she was down to sleep my mother-in-law was walking into the kitchen and took a look down the hallway (wife's room was at the end of the hall) and she could see what appeared to be a man in a trench-coat leaning over her crib calming her down. My mother-in-law thought "oh, that's nice..he's looking after her too." and went on with her business. A few minutes later it sank what she saw and thought and freaked out. My father in law got up thinking she was crazy and saw the man there as well. I think what freaks them both out the most is how NOT weird it felt or seemed.

To this day they'll swear it was real, and have come to describe the man as an angel of sorts. They saw, and knew that he wasn't there to hurt my wife. I guess she calmed way down at night after that, the screaming nights ended there.

3. Ty_Guy_42 doesn't want to believe he lived in a haunted house…but he definitely did.

I did not believe in ghosts. Sure, I was entertained by the notion, but anyone who came out and stated that they believed in ghosts, I dismissed as New Age hippies or whatever. And then I lived in a haunted house. It started out as little things. The bathroom door would open violently if anyone ever closed the latch, so often that we came to count on it. I asked my roommate if he ever noticed a red light in the spare bedroom (as I always did) when walking up the stairs in the dark. He did. I'd always go in the spare room to investigate, but could never find the source of the light. These things, I could explain away. Then weirder things started to happen. One night, I was sitting in the living room with my gf and my roommate, when I noticed the shape of a woman's face appear in the pane of glass of the window in the other room. We all witnessed this. Even then, I tried to explain it away as a trick of the light. What finally convinced me that something was happening was one time when I was brushing my teeth, something tugged insistently on my sleeve, and I'm 100% sure that I didn't catch it on anything (I was in the middle of the bathroom). Have you ever been fishing? It was like a fish was nibbling on the line, except on my t-shirt sleeve. That freaked me out. Still, stranger things happened. We'd hear footsteps upstairs while home alone. I often saw shadows out of the corner of my eye - one time, I even saw a shadow while looking right at it, in the middle of the room - not up against a wall (I moved around to make sure) - for 5 minutes or so. Twice, while heading up the stairs to my room for bed, I heard a woman's voice say "goodnight" to me, over my shoulder. The strangest thing that happened was New Years Eve, 3 years ago. My roommate and I were hosting a party, and waiting for people to show up, sitting in the living room. Suddenly, I felt something brush against my arm, and the light bulb in the lamp I was sitting beside exploded. There were a few other things that happened, and some I'm forgetting, I'm sure, but the fact is that too many strange things happened for it to be a coincidence. I have since moved out of the house, but the belief remains - something strange was happening there.

4. Berjj saw shadows in places they couldn't possibly be.

This... Holy shit... I've experienced this! When I still lived with my parents I experienced some weird things. My room was in the basement and I remember a couple of times that I heard footsteps upstairs, but when I went to investigate I found myself home alone. I remember one night when I heard someone come down the stairs. A few moments later there was a door opening somewhere. I called out but received no answer. I asked my parents about it the following morning but they had been fast asleep upstairs the entire night. I've also heard faint and short whispers at times, but I usually just dismissed it all as random noise emitted by an old wooden house.

The thing that freaked me out the most however, was that one time when I saw a shadow in the middle of a corridor, not up against a wall. I've caught glimpses of shadows and movement in the corner of my eye at times, but I usually dismiss it as some hair that got stuck in the corner of my eye or just me being tired in general. This one time however, I was walking down the hallway towards the bathroom when there was a shadow that flashed and then disappeared right in the middle of the hallway, just a couple of feet away from me. It was gone in less than a second, but it had not been in the corner of my eye, it had been in the center of the hallway and the center of my field of vision. It was over fast, but it was definitely the shadow of a person wearing a long dress.

I moved out of the house almost 2 years ago and I haven't had anything remotely similar occur to me since.

5. OlliePumpkinTree has found herself being followed…while being alone.

My firstborn used to get night terrors and when I would go running to his room because he was screaming bloody murder at 3am, the room was always ice cold and he was staring at the same corner in the room every damn time. I've no doubt he has seen things. He is an old soul. When we moved from that house, the night terrors stopped.

About a week after moving into our current house, my husband and I were laying in bed about to fall asleep when we both heard glass shatter. We sat straight up in bed, hair bristling on the backs of our necks. I was sure we were getting broken into. My husband got up and checked the house. Nothing. Then I go up and we both searched every window every room everything. No broken glass. It sounded as though someone had taken a large glass vase and thrown it to the ground. It was so loud. But we never found anything broken. Three nights later, I heard it again. My husband was asleep that time already and didn't hear it, but I woke him so he could help me check. Again, nothing. Then it never happened again.

For the first couple years of being in this house, I would hear people talking. If I was upstairs, I could hear them downstairs and visa versa. I could hear them walking up and down my stairs thumps and creaks and all. They never really scared me, their voices were pleasant and conversational. But here's the weird part, I only heard them when my husband was gone. Like clockwork, he would leave for work or to go out and then a few minutes later...bam.

I've also heard a crying baby in my house. It always stopped the moment I got up to investigate. Weird.

I've been followed by something in my house. Not sure what it was, but it scared the crap out of me. It followed me around all day one day making noises behind me: opening and shutting cupboards and drawers, moving things slightly on the counters, etc. only happened once but it lasted for nearly 6 hours. My kids didn't notice anything and I didn't try to call their attention to it.

I'm sure whatever things Ive got in my house don't like that I'm writing this, suddenly I'm feeling a bit sick to my stomach and I've got butterflies in my stomach like that panicky feeling.

6. There are no ghosts in tehforestppl's house. The bed shakes on its own for some other, totally rational reason, right?

Let me preface this by saying I still do not believe in ghosts. There must be some explanation, right? God I hope so. I live in a Victorian house built in 1878. Historical documents we've found show that at least 8 people have passed in the house. Anyway, my room (used to be my parents room) is the most active. The most common occurrence is the bed shaking. This is not a violent shake and it is also not some illusion caused by heartbeat or some such other thing. The bed will shake for around 30 seconds or so. After the bed shakes, you can usually bet that shortly after it stops, it will feel as though someone sits on the bed. It's always the same place as well. If you happen to be in the spot it will feel like a light (5 pounds or so) bag had been placed on you. Occasionally you can also feel something touch your head (quite forcefully). That's the one that trips me out the most and is the most unexplainable to me. There are noises all the time and what sounds like footsteps every night but I attribute that to an old house that makes noise. Hopefully?

7. Lamboni's version of What About Bob? features 100 percent more ghost than the original.

There is a black silhouette of a man that will appear on occasion in my parents house, and has since we moved in when I was very young. We call him Bob, because that was the name of the old guy who lived there (and died there) before my parents bought it. Everyone in my family (mom, dad, 6 siblings) has seen him multiple times, even the dogs bark at him. But he's never harmed anything (my mom swears he broke a cup once, but I'm pretty sure that it was a coincidence or something). But, yeah, he checks up on us every once in a while. We'll be eating dinner or watching tv or whatever and there he'll be, just standing in the doorway to our dining room (that's his favorite room), watching us. However, when you do look at him, he drifts out of the room and goes up the stairs to the second floor and then onwards to the attic stairs and then into the attic. The only bad part about that is that the attic stairs are next to my bedroom door, so I get to deal with the door slamming every time he goes up there. Also, when I'm stoned, I have to go through his favorite room to get munchies and I'm always terrified that he'll surprise me and I'll shit myself or something.

8. Chubbybunns house was haunted by…a pair of boots?

I did when i was very young. i was about 5-6 years old give or take. it was an old house, we moved there because it was pretty cheap. at first there was random cold spots even in the summer. this was in northern Idaho and we had no air conditioner so there was no way that there could be any reason for cold spots.

seven months after we moved in, we started hearing heavy boots tromping up and down the stairs. my mother accused me and my brother of doing it to scare her. she finally believed us after we panicked and ran into her room to hide.

we said it wasn't us, she got this real angry look on her face and just as she is about to start yelling...... THUMP scrapeTHUMPscrape slowly coming up the stairs.

mind you, she was single at the time and rather small and me and my brother were very young, so there was no one living there that could possibly have made that sound.

things also had a habit of disappearing and doors would occasionally slam shut without anyone touching them. after about a year and a half, you couldn't walk around the house without feeling that someone or something was watching you.

finally my mother had enough and we bailed the hell out of there back to my grampa's place. found out later that a miner who lived in that house had killed himself after his wife divorced him.

since one of my best friends lived not too far away from that house, i would pass by it every other day or so. about 2 months or so after moving out, i just happened to look up at the upstairs window (incidentally, my former room) and saw some shadowy movement. i freaked right the fuck out and ran my ass off towards my friends house and told him what i saw. neither of us ever went near that house again.

9. Holy moly, flythedelorean has heard the whistling, too! YIKES.

I'm fairly sure my apartment is haunted. Specifically my room.

  1. My bedroom door will open and shut on its own, even when all the windows in the apt are closed.
  2. This only happened once, but the heat pipe in my room shook so violently that chips of paint flew off of it. I know pipes shake when the heat is on, but this wasn't normal. It was like someone was standing in my roommate's room (we live in a duplex) and wringing it like they were trying to choke out the pipe from above.
  3. One time my roommate and I were watching TV, and we both heard whistling but didn't say anything. Finally I was like "can I pause the TV for a sec?" And we sat there in silence, and both heard whistling again. We looked at each other, horrified, and I texted our next door neighbor to ask if she was home, and she said everyone in their apartment was gone for the weekend. Then we turned the TV up really loud and tried to forget it happened.

I don't know if this has anything to do with it, but we looked up that a girl who died in the Triangle Shirtwaist fire lived in our building when she died. But it's a pretty old walkup, so I'm sure there are pleeeenty of potential ghosts roaming these halls.

Also my mom refused to change the hideous wallpaper in the master bedroom in the house I grew up in (built in the late 1800s old Victorian style house) because she swears the previous owners (spinster sisters, one of whom died in the house) came to her in a dream and threatened her after she brought in a designer to redo the room.

10. LadyBigknuckles's friend's dad ended up selling his haunted apartment, but it's unclear if the ghost came along as part of the deal.

I've told a few about my house before, but this one actually really scared me. My friend's father owned an apartment in Downtown Fredericksburg just so he could come and visit with the kids more easily on weekends, stuff like that. It was not too far from where we grew up. Anyway, this building was split into four different apartments, my friends being on the top. Since her dad was rarely there, we would sometimes go there to hang out or get some space from our families. One day, my friend was finishing up an art project and we decided to go hang out at the apartment while she did this.

The building apparently already has a history of being haunted, there are many stories about an old man being seen around (I think her father was told someone was murdered there in the 80's) and generally just creeping people out. Now, while I get excited by the paranormal, I had never seen anything there so I just shrugged it off. So there we are, sitting in the living room when I start to yawn a little. My friend tells me I can go lay down in the bedroom, about 20 feet from where she was sitting on the couch. I leave the bedroom door open and we call back and forth to each other for a while before I eventually drift off to sleep.

I'm out for maybe thirty minutes until I hear my friend whisper softly in my ear "wake up". This is followed quickly with a more stern "get up". This gives me the chills for some reason. She then says something inaudible so I sit up, and respond with a groggy "huh?". I rub my eyes and look around only to realize that she has never left her original spot in the living room, and was in fact staring at me in horror.

No words were said. She packed up her things, all the while shaking, as I sat impatiently by the door. Once we get in the car and make our way home, we acknowledge that we both heard something in the room with me. This wasn't what had her frightened, however. At the same time I had heard the whispers, she thought I was talking in my sleep. She glanced up through the corner of her eye and saw me walking around the bed, shadowy in the approaching evening (light was off in the bedroom, on in the other). Seconds later she saw me sit up in the bed, apparently awakened by someone that wasn't quite there. The scariest part for me is that we could correlate and kind of make sense of it- at the same time I heard someone talking to me, she saw a figure pacing around me. It really, really creeped me out for a long time.

I went back a few times before they ended up selling the place, but never again in the evening/at night. There were incidents with other friends, but I was never there for anymore. Apparently books took to flying off of shelves for no good reason. Shame that it's so scary there though, it's a cool little apartment.

*Some stories were edited for spelling errors too scary not to fix.

'Labia puffing' is the painful, expensive solution to a 'problem' you never knew you had.

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The Daily Star reports that a growing number of women are opting to have their labia "puffed." This 30-minute non-surgical procedure, an alternative to the slightly more invasive "vagina lift," promises to make your labia majora look like they did when you were a minora.

So how does one puff a set of labia? Simple. Fat from elsewhere in the patient's body is extracted through liposuction, put into a hypodermic needled, and injected directly into the labia majora. Filling out the labia in this way supposedly eliminates wrinkles, droopy skin, and all the other natural effects of aging. Plastic surgeon Dr. Jennifer Walden described the benefits of labia needling to the Star:

The vagina, like the rest of our bodies, loses volume (from collagen and fatty tissue) and fullness with age as well as laxity of the skin. Plumping the labia majora gives it a more youthful appearance. The benefit of labia puffing is that it uses you own fat from another area of your body to add volume back to an area that deflates with time. This makes it look great as it immediately refills it to an appearance similar to what it may have looked like prior to childbearing and/or menopause.

A menopausal mother of five can have the vagina of a 19-year-old? What an age we live in! But while rejuvenating your privates by sticking a needle into them may seem ideal, there is a catch: it's pricey. The procedure currently costs between $2,500-$3,500. How ironic that labia puffing will leave the folds of your wallet hanging loose and empty.

Would you consider having your labia puffed? Or do you think this is just another attempt to manipulate women into being insecure about a new part of their body, so hustlers can profit off it? After all, anybody who gets face-to-face with your genitals and judges them for looking "old" is not a person worth impressing. It's a vagina, not a used Camry.

Article 15

Guy booted off airplane for catcalling stewardess because Alaska Airlines respects women.

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Everyone fly Alaska Airlines! The airline kicked a male passenger off a plane after he catcalled a female flight attendant. Because if there's one place women can feel safe, apparently, it's inside a metal tube hurdling through the sky at hundreds of miles per hour. The whole incident was documented on Facebook by a passenger named Amber Nelson who was also on board the Oct. 9 flight leaving the Seattle-Tacoma Airport. "Today I had an experience that drove home so powerfully the way it feels to be a woman in the world today," she wrote in the post, which has since gone viral.

She said the passenger called out "ooh, sexy" while the flight attendant was demonstrating how to wear a life vest. She warned him "you need to be respectful" and he responded "c'mon, I'm just playing with you!"

IS THERE ANYTHING MORE INFURIATING?

About ten minutes later, the man was asked to leave the flight. Hallelujah.

Nelson praised the airline for how they handled the incident. "I felt honored as a patron of the airline—and as a woman—because Alaska Airlines supported their staff and those of us on board who were demeaned by another passenger's juvenile and exceedingly disrespectful behavior," she said in her post.

It's a tough world out there for women, but props to Alaska Airlines for supporting women and implementing a no-tolerance approach to sexual harassment. If only the GOP would do the same.

You can read Nelson's post in full here:

Today I had an experience that drove home so powerfully the way it feels to be a woman in the world today. Before take...

Posted by Amber D. Nelson on Sunday, October 9, 2016


Article 13

A Portland bakery was accused of racism because of an Oreo cupcake.

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A bakery in Portland, Oregon has been accused of racism for selling an Oreo cupcake named “Mr. President," The Oregonian reports. I would be the first to dump a racist cupcake in the garbage (after eating the frosting off because I'm only human), but here's the thing: the owners of the bakery are black, and say they named the cupcake after the President because they heard President Obama loves Oreos. (The word "Oreo" is sometimes used as a slur against people of color.)

This nuance seems to have flown over the head of some customers, however, who have slammed the bakery, called Fat Cupcake, on Yelp. “Very troubling," wrote one reviewer. "They were serving a cupcake called the 'Mr. President' that had an Oreo cookie inside. When I tried to point out the racism implied, they claimed that 'our current president loves Oreos.’ I won't be doing business with them and please do not support racism in Portland or anywhere."

The review has since been removed from Yelp and the rest of their reviews are overwhelmingly positive.

The bakery's owner Anjelica Hayes said she's not racist, pointing out "I myself am black." And she added that the cupcake was only meant to honor President Obama. "I just thought it was an honorary name," she said. "I thought I'd be honored if someone named a cupcake after me." She said someone told her that President Barack Obama's favorite cookie was the Oreo, "so we thought that was a cool coincidence."

This isn't the first time one of their cupcakes has made the news for reasons other than deliciousness: they also had a blue-and-white cupcake called “The Intern." This pissed people off because they thought it was a jab at Monica Lewinsky—which it obviously was.

But also, it's a cupcake. Oh Portland, sometimes you are just so Portland.

This woman tested her hotel's customer service. They delivered.

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The Hilton Garden Inn in Louisville East, Kentucky won at customer service when they were able to fulfill one customer's weird requests.

When a customer named Meg booked her hotel room online, she wrote in the additional comments section that she would like a box of chocolates and a cat waiting for her in her room when she arrives (honestly, why don't hotels provide these things automatically?).

Well, the Hilton Garden Inn certainly did not disappoint.

The chocolate is not exactly in a box but who cares, it's still chocolate.

They also included a handwritten note.

Thank you for choosing the Hilton Garden Inn Louisville East!

We hope you have everything you need. Please let us know if there is anything else we can do.

Your HGI Team!

Now you may be wondering if the hotel neglected the most important part of the request—the cat. Although they did not provide a living, breathing feline, they did supply Meg with the second best thing.

At least you don't have to change a litter box.

These pictures were uploaded to Imgur under the title, "Hilton Garden Inn, Louisville East has won my business forever" so it is safe to say that Meg was a happy customer.

People shared the one thing at their school that everyone remembers as 'the incident.'

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Everyone remembers that one scandalous thing that happened during school, like a prank or a fight, that was so shocking everyone refers to it as "the incident." At my school, it was the time a student found one of our teachers in an old issue of Playboy. Remember yours? Here are 13 stories people shared on reddit about their school's incident to help you jog your memory.

1. ​verita remembers the good ole laxative chocolate days.

In middle school some kids put laxative chocolates in donuts and handed them out. The school went on lockdown. The police came. Kids were crying. Kids were pooping. Kids were looking for some donuts to get out of class. It was an interesting day.

2. ​taoz's senior class had a modern day hero.

I have a friend who got expelled for planting a keylogger on one of the administrative computers in High School. Changed everyone's grades in his senior class to A's. Apparently they had no backups (or else he deleted them) because he helped a couple people graduate high school that day. I believe he got caught after attempting to retrieve the keylogger by rappelling through a skylight.

3. No one could ever forget reinwall's bathroom pooper.

In elementary school all the boys got sent outside the last hour of class and lined up because someone had smeared their shit all over in the men's bathroom. they told us to all hold out our hands and would send us back to class one by one after looking at them (I know now that they were looking at our fingernails because most kids arent smart enough to clean under them).

4. ​​​ajones321 is sticking to over the counter cold medicine from now on.

Junior year. A sophomore boy put a sealed container of chicken noodle soup in an empty locker next to the Chemistry Room. It sat there for months, easily 5 or 6, until somebody thought about it again. It was brought up in Chemistry class (11th grade) and our Chemistry teacher took a pair of tongs to the locker and planned to dispose of it once and for all. His hands were too shaky that day and as soon as he lifted it out of the locker it fell, spilling the entire cesspool that the chicken noodle soup became. He immediately ran back to his room, screaming 'Oh God! Shut the doors! Shut the doors!' and hilarity ensued.

The smell was indescribable. Raw sewage, rotten chicken, fermented noodles all mixed into one. I have never and probably will never smell anything remotely close to it again. The smell permeated the entire floor and even seeped down a stairwell next to the spill to the classrooms immediately below.

The day of the disaster everyone gagged as they traveled through the halls. Luckily it happened during 8th period, last period before we went home. A hazmat team was called to take care of the spill, just in case there were airborne diseases.

For the rest of the school year, the teachers lit candles in the hallways and in their classrooms but the smell never left us. It stayed all summer and even into the next school year until it finally went away altogether.

5. Hungtington will really make you wonder what a school barn is.

Exchange student from Scotland went around fucking any guy she could. She was finally caught in a gangbang in the school barn with like 5 other students.

6. ​AFRICAN_BIG_COCK will give you another reason to never become a gas station attendant.

Some girl was stringing this guy along and invited him to a party implying sex as a result of him showing up, he got there and everyone sprayed him with shaving cream and made fun of him for thinking he had a chance so he went to the gas station and filled up a 5 gallon jug with gas and went back to the party and lit her car on fire.

7. nkdeck07 remembers when a kid really put his foot in it.

Kid managed to put a pencil through his foot in the middle of lunchtime.

I was still in line and saw the entire cafeteria stand up and go running towards the windows. He'd apparently been trying to break the pencil by stepping on it but instead managed to put it through his foot (to the point where it came out the top). There was so much screaming

8. branchout's pranksters probably could have gotten away with this one.

Senior prank consisted of dumping month old fish into the air duct from the roof. They couldn't figure out what was going on at first, school was closed for a week, hazmat was called, and ultimately after the police got involved for vandalism the kids responsible fessed up and got community service hours. Good times.

9. ​larkster's private Christian school found Jesus.

At a private Christian school a girl in 12th grade got pregnant. According to the official rules, she was supposed to be expelled to protect the school's 'image'.

Instead all the teachers and principals got together and decided that that's not what Jesus would do, and that the rule was idiotic. They didn't expel her and gave her all the support she needed during the pregnancy and after.

10. dharawal has a great reason to never underestimate your opponent.

One of the big 6ft plus "tough" students who had a bit of a reputation as a bully and troublemaker decided he was going to try and intimidate one of the art teachers under the mistaken impression that just because Mr Scott was only 5 '5 in his socks and about 55kgs wringing wet that Mr Scott would be a pushover.

He didn't know that before Mr Scott trained to be a teacher, Mr Scott was in the Army, and whilst he was in the Army Mr Scott was the divisional weight champion for boxing in Australia. He tried to push Mr Scott out of the way and when that didn't work he tried to punch him, Mr Scott punched him on the jaw and knocked him out.

And before anyone says it was wrong, this was 1977, my school still had corporal punishment, teachers could and did smack you round the head if you were being a dick. You certainly never ever laid a hand on a teacher, talking back got you the cane or ruler. So that's why this was the biggest incident at my school.

11. strugglebusdriver437 knew some legenary bandits who never claimed their glory.

Someone stole a urinal from one of the boys' bathrooms in high school. All year the principal went on about how if we knew anything we should come forward because "we must stop the Bathroom Bandits!" Of course no one came forward because once the Bathroom Bandits had a name they became legend. I never did find out who they were, but someone found the urinal three years later, hidden under some stairs behind the auditorium, a good distance from the bathroom it was taken from.

12. pics-or-didnt-happen's story is a complete touchdown.

A girl in our school just disappeared one day.

Rumors that she was pregnant, etc.

Some glitch in the system had her on the honor roll every semester. They'd call her name in assembly every time.

Well, I knew her, she wasn't pregnant, just dropped out and when I told her her name kept getting called for honours, she thought it would be hilarious to actually show up and collect her gift cards (that was the prize).

So she did... With a fake baby in her arms. Then spiked the baby on the stage.

Damn Jess, you were nuts.

13. And finally, Lorale, who has the video evidence to back his story up.

Some kid jumped off the second floor balcony on to a giant christmas tree. Then it happened again a few years later. They don't put up Christmas trees anymore.

You can watch the actual jump here.

Article 9

This map will show you what TV show your state is obsessed with.

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It's no surprise that the 50 states, with their 50 personalities, enjoy different shows. This map from CableTV.com, a site to find the best cable/internet deal, displays the shows each state likes more than any other. In other words, The Big Bang Theory may be the most-watched show in every state, but if Louisiana is the only place where a significant number of people are obsessed with Big Sugar, Louisiana likes Big Sugar more than any other state. Here's the full map, followed by regional breakdowns and some findings:

In general, people love any TV show set in their state, or at least region. But, for the record, South Dakota wins the title of "likes The Big Bang Theory more than anyone else."

The Southeast

Beyond the clear trend of watching shows set in your area, there are other factors as well. Religious states like Utah (which is also the state with the most children per capita) prefer family friendly shows with clean language, like Once Upon A Time.

The Northeast

A state's crime rate is perhaps the most interesting factor. Higher-crime states prefer shows where criminals are the protagonist (next door to squeaky-clean Utah, Nevada is watching Lucifer).

The Midwest+

So states with crime being fascinated by criminals is not weird, but low-crime states have a pattern of loving supernatural, magical, and fantasy shows (Vermont still loves The X-Files and Maine is binging Stranger Things).

Southwest + Alaska & Hawaii (Hawaii likes Lost, by the way)

Finally, everyone loves cop shows everywhere.

The West

Here's the full list:

Alabama: Legends of Tomorrow

Alaska: Star Trek

Arizona: Aquarius

Arkansas: Smallville

California: Silicon Valley

Colorado: South Park

Connecticut: Gossip Girl

Delaware: Ballers

District of Columbia: Scandal

Florida: Tyrant

Georgia: Power

Hawaii: Lost

Idaho: Reign

Illinois: New Girl

Indiana: Supergirl

Iowa: Two and a Half Men

Kansas:The Flash

Kentucky: One Tree Hill

Louisiana: Queen Sugar

Maine: Stranger Things

Maryland: The Wire

Massachusetts: Ray Donovan

Michigan: Dexter

Minnesota: The Simpsons

Mississippi: Friday Night Lights

Missouri: Hannibal

Montana: Blue Bloods

Nebraska: Modern Family

Nevada: Lucifer

New Hampshire: The Fosters

New Jersey: The Sopranos

New Mexico: Breaking Bad

New York: Gotham

North Carolina: The Blacklist

North Dakota: Parks and Recreation

Ohio: How I Met Your Mother

Oklahoma: Homeland

Oregon: Grimm

Pennsylvania: Banshee

Rhode Island: Law & Order: SVU

South Carolina: Vice Principals

South Dakota: The Big Bang Theory

Tennessee: Nashville

Texas: Narcos

Utah: Once Upon A Time

Vermont: The X-Files

Virginia: Quantico

Washington:Cold Feet

West Virginia:Prison Break

Wisconsin: Castle

Wyoming: Orange is the New Black

Nancy Grace walks out of interview after being accused of 'capitalizing on dead kids.'

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On Tuesday, Nancy Grace stopped by Jim Norton and Sam Roberts' radio show for an interview while promoting her upcoming Hallmark channel special, Hailey Dean Mystery: Murder, With Love (in which she plays herself). I have no idea how the movie is, because it doesn't air until October 23, but the interview was pretty hostile, until she abruptly cut it short after getting angry at Norton and Roberts for accusing her of "capitalizing on dead kids."

At the start of the interview, Norton admitted that he's had a problem with Grace for a long time, because he feels like her style of news reporting is "capitalizing on tragedies." Grace responded, not unreasonably, "I invite crime victims on and tell stories from their point of view. I help find missing people and help solve unsolved homicides." Norton clarified that it's not just that she reports tragedies, it's how she reports them, with "catchy" hashtags that "trivialize" the cases. Grace and Norton basically agreed to disagree and moved on, but the interview didn't get much better from there.

Never in a million years did I think I'd find myself feeling bad for Nancy Grace, but this interview is definitely rough. At one point, Grace says,

Okay, let me just set it straight right now. I'm sorry that you guys clearly don't like what I do. I feel bad about it. So…there. You obviously don't like me, that's okay. I'm okay with my show, and I'm okay with representing crime victims. It's like the two of you are so anxious to throw a shot at me. . . You haven't asked one decent question since I walked in here. Everything both of you asked has been an attack.

Then Norton brings up Grace's use of Twitter hashtags again, inquiring, "How do you justify latching onto all of these hashtags and things without saying that you are capitalizing on dead kids?" Grace snaps back, "Oh, so you're back to your first question," and then says, "My program is to help solve unsolved homicides and find missing people, which we have done. Now, if you don't like that, and you don't like the way I do it, then don't watch it. Oops, I think your time is up." And that's that. At which point Norton says "That went better than I thought it would." Yeah, same here.


World's greatest Uber driver surprises passengers with rescue puppies.

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In recent years, Uber drivers have become important people in our lives. They get us home safely when we're drunk. They listen to our secrets. Sometimes they tell us fun stories about their lives. But one Uber driver in particular has gone above and beyond the call of duty.

In a new video from Mashable, driver Jonathan Guarano surprises his passengers with puppies he borrowed from a local animal shelter. It's hard to tell who's more excited: the pups (Peanut and Mocha) or the people who got unexpected puppies with their Uber ride.

Okay, fine. The people are way more excited. Best Uber driver EVER.

The 26 funniest tweets of 10/12/16: Trump gets Election Day wrong, men vs. women voters, Cubs and more.

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Today in "topics," Donald Trump urges people to vote... on November 28th? Maps projecting the men's vote vs. the women's vote confuse many, Yom Kippur is being hungrily observed, the Cubs won, and more! These are the 26 funniest tweets of 10/12/16:

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Cartoonist Sarah Andersen's hilariously grim comics make the realities of modern female life look adorable.

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24-year-old cartoonist Sarah Andersen has become a hit on social media with her extremely relatable comics about the harsh realities of life as an anxiety-ridden millennial woman living in the big city in 2016.

Andersen's wickedly funny, honest observations are offset by her adorably engaging, deceptively simple art style.

After reading a few of her strips, it's not surprising why Andersen has 174,000 Twitter followers, and a staggering 619,000 on Instagram.

Andersen's comics are so popular, she has collected them into a very successful book, entitled Adulthood Is a Myth.

Keep an eye out for more of Sarah Anderson's work. She's not going anywhere.

Article 3

7 things you missed today while you were at your boring adult job: racist cupcakes, 'Law & Order: SVU,' Janet Jackson.

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Do you sometimes feel like your boring adult job is getting in the way of you staying up to date with everything that's going on in the world? Do you sometimes wish you could just forget about work and read the internet all day? Well, lucky for you, my boring adult job is to read the internet all day. (Yeah, I get paid for this!) So I'll catch you up. Here are seven very important internet stories you missed today, October 12, 2016, while you were at work.

1. A bakery in Oregon was accused of being racist for selling Oreo "Mr. President" cupcakes. Obama just loves Oreos.

2. 'Labia puffing' is a new trend that's catching on. It sounds very painful.

3. Law & Order: SVU is going to air an episode based on a 2016 presidential candidates. Bet you can't guess which one!

4. A man almost died on a plane because the crew didn't believe a black woman who said she was a doctor. She's definitely a doctor.

5. Janet Jackson is pregnant. But we kind of already knew that.

6. A cartoonist managed to make all the terrible things about being a woman adorable.

7. This raccoon is a master criminal.

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