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Everyone's trolling Fox News for trying to trick people in to thinking the border is a war zone.

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Happy Friday! The 9-5 work seek is coming to a halt and soon you will be able to relax and call the shots on your own terms. But first, you must know that Fox News is getting massively trolled, and the memes are top notch.

The most recent wave of backlash comes in response to a tweet and photo posted by Fox News contributor Lawrence Jones III, wherein it looks like he's preparing to enter a warzone. The picture was taken near the border, and was undoubtedly posted to create fear mongering around immigration.

It wasn't long before the MSNBC correspondent Jacob Soboroff chimed in to point out the obvious: you don't need a bulletproof vest at the border.

While many asserted he's not wearing a real one, the appearance of the photo feels very intentionally staged as propaganda, and there will undoubtedly be people who believe it's real.

It didn't take long for the photo to get attacked by a fleet of unflattering comparisons, and the explosion is beautiful.

There's even photo documentation suggesting Jonest didn't wear the tactical vest after the photo was taken, which just confirms it was all for appearance.

Other reporters also chimed in to share the times they covered the border without need of protective clothing.

But the best responses to the tweet absolutely came in the form of memed versions of the photo. This is a true thread full of art.

Whatever you do this weekend, it's safe to assume you'll be getting roasted less than Jones.


14 people share the wildest historical events that sound made up. Brace yourself.

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Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction, as Redditor UltimateCockSlayer demonstrated today with a must-read thread. But before diving in, let's take a moment to recognize the hilarity of that username:

So thanks to UltimateCockSlayer, people recounted some of the most outrageous historical events that sound fictional, but really happened. Um, why weren't any of these mentioned in my high school history classes? Maybe if the curriculum covered them, I'd be able to recall something about the War of 1812 or the Byzantine Empire today.

1. BallinFC

The Great Stink of London in 1858.

One summer the heat dried up the River Thames (where all the human waste went) and an unbearable smell pervaded throughout the entire city. All Parliament representatives were eventually coerced out of their homes outside of London to convene and solve the issue. Much to the citizens’ glee, Parliament was held in their building on the bank of the River Thames, resulting in one of the fastest Parliament decisions ever made to reform the London sewer system.

2. nezumipi

"In 496 BC the army of King Goujian of Yueh put three ranks of criminals in the front of their battle formation. Their task was to impress the enemy with their ferocity and commitment by chopping off their own heads as soon as battle was joined. The tactic was a success; while their opponents from the State of Wu were recovering from their astonishment they were overrun by the rest of the Yueh army. The convicts, who were condemned men anyway, had been coerced by the threat that if they didn't comply with this plan their families would be executed also." - Stephen Fry on QI

3. emoji_wut

Jack a Baboon who was employed to change rail signals.

“After initial skepticism, the railway decided to officially employ Jack once his job competency was verified. The baboon was paid twenty cents a day, and a half-bottle of beer each week. It is widely reported that in his nine years of employment with the railroad, Jack never made a mistake.”

4. pdamoney

The town of Rothenburg ob der Tauber in Germany: One of the countries oldest and most preserved cities.

Essentially during the 30 years war, the catholic army wanted to destroy the town because they resisted the church. Count Von Tilly (sounds like a Monty Python name) was going to destroy the town, but as a gesture of peace the town offered him a Mass (3.25 L) of local wine. He declared that if anyone in the town could drink the Mass of wine in one go, he would spare the town and move on. Then someone just walked up and did it. So the army left.

Much much later during world war 2, when the US was performing air raids, someone in the White House knew of this town and pleaded that we do not destroy it. So it has been saved from 2 wars all because one guy chugged a bunch of wine.

5. Moosewalaaaa

Return of Napoleon

An army was sent to intercept him, and they ended up fighting for him. If it were shown in a movie most people would have considered it cheesy and unrealistic.

6. McPansen

Vesna Vulović fell from a height of 10160 meters and lived. She holds the world record for surviving the highest fall without a parachute.

7. firewoven

The Japanese "Kamikaze" (Divine Wind) that saved the country from an amphibious invasion by the Mongolian hordes. The Mongols captured a foothold on some outlying Japanese islands, and started to attack the mainland. The Japanese army pushed them back, and they had to retreat to China. When they did, a typhoon ravaged their navy and sank their ships.

The Mongolians, (probably reasonably) seeing this as a fluke, decided to rebuild and attack again. Seven years later. Unfortunately for them, the Japanese fortified their coastline. After basically months of sailing around seeking a place to land, ANOTHER typhoon struck their fleet and destroyed them.

There would be no third invasion.

8. CrypticZM

Some guy in Australia decided he wanted to hunt rabbits but rabbits don’t live in Australia so then he released like 12 in his backyard and now there’s a fuck ton of rabbits in Australia

9. PizzaTime666

The fire in Dublin Ireland on June 18, 1875. A fire broke out and spread to a malt house and the heat broke open every alcohol barrel and flooded the streets with it. The people of Dublin decides to drink the burning alcohol that is spreading in the streets, filled with liter and debris and was literally on fire. 13 people died not from the fire or smoke but from alcohol poisoning they got from drinking the street whiskey.

10. tiy24

The many defenestrations of Prague. Starting a war by throwing diplomats out the window is almost straight out of 300.

11. Dudebroman__5000

Serial killer Carl Panzram broke into the home of former president William H. Taft and stole jewelry, bonds, and a gun. With the money he got from the first two he bought a yacht in which he used the gun to kill a bunch of sailors.

12. Naweezy

The entire Taiping Rebellion.

A war started by a Chinese peasant who dreamed (and believed) he was Jesus' younger brother. Although poor, the first thing he did was have a giant demon slaying sword forged. Took over a city. Asked the British why they wouldn't pay him tribute as the new head of their faith. Engaged in total war with the Qing. Applied pseduo-communist policies like abolishing private property. Separated women and men from ever interacting, and sent the women to the front lines.

Over 20 million people died, with some estimates as high as 40 million. It was the fourth deadliest conflict in human history. IT KILLED MORE PEOPLE THAN WWI. Only WWII, Transition of the Ming, and Quing conquest of the Ming were deadlier

13. CarlSpencer

In the 1800s there were street vendors in Egypt who sold...ancient Egyptian mummies. Just lined them up on a street corner and sold them like they were umbrellas on a rainy day. English tourists would buy them to display as oddities.

14. drunk_portuguese

A Finnish solder, who managed to escape capture after losing his squad in a methed-up hallucination. Being the doctor of the group he was carrying the meth pills for the whole squad, and in order to survive and escape his pursuers he took the whole pill box, 30 pills, when the allowed dosage for a grown man was ONE. He survived in the soviet wilderness for two weeks eating only pine buds and one time a Siberian jay that he caught and ate raw. When he was rescued he was 45kg and had a resting heart rate of 200bpm

26 Boozy Memes For Anyone Who's Getting Lit This Weekend.

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"It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth."

-George Burns

It's the weekend, baby. We made it. Let's get the party started with these hilarious memes about drinking. They will make you laugh and best of all they won't leave you feeling hungover tomorrow.

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HERE I COME

A post shared by 𝔼𝕞𝕞𝕖𝕣𝕤 (@hoegivesnofucks) on

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Vodka works wonders

A post shared by 𝔼𝕞𝕞𝕖𝕣𝕤 (@hoegivesnofucks) on

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Man asks if he's wrong for not footing wedding bill after stepdaughter's dad is invited. But there's more.

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It would be the understatement of the ages to say that weddings are a highly emotional affair. When everything goes smoothly, weddings can feel like a slice of euphoria, a place and party where loved ones can celebrate the compelling power of love.

However, when wedding plans go south they can quickly escalate into an emotional disaster that ruptures even the closest relationships.

A recent post on the Am I The Asshole subreddit deals with the emotionally tricky elements of weddings, like who pays, and how to set boundaries against toxic family members.

The Reddit user justalurker__ wrote that he's been in his stepdaughter's life for a long time, he loves her very much, and he's been excited to pay for her upcoming wedding. However, her biological father, who was abusive and previously in jail, has resurfaced on the scene greatly complicating the situation.

"I've been in my stepdaughter's life since she was 2. My wife divorced her husband because he was abusive. He went to prison for that. But even after he served his sentence, he was never involved in my her life."

"She's getting married next month. She always wanted to have a destination wedding in Mykonos, Greece. We decided that I'd help them pay for the wedding. Unfortunately, she lost a lot of money recently and I decided to pay for the wedding. Her fiance is helping, but it's not much. I love her and nothing would make me more happy."

Originally, all the wedding arrangements were securely in place for the upcoming destination wedding in Mykonos, Greece. However, things god dicey when the bride decides she wants to give her biological father a chance to walk her down the aisle.

"Yesterday, she told me that she wanted her bio dad to walk her down the aisle. She told me that he's a changed man and he deserves a chance and she'd try to accommodate me elsewhere. I'm really hurt by her decision. I was really looking forward to walking her down the aisle. My wife thinks that we should not pay for the wedding anymore. She also thinks we should not attend the wedding. I think I agree with her reasoning. But if I don't pay, she won't have her destination wedding. AITA here?"

Since the mother of the bride understandably doesn't want to attend the wedding if her abusive ex is there, the stepfather wants to support his wife first and foremost. So, he asked the internet if he'd be an asshole if he doesn't pay for the wedding.

TakoyakiTanuki suggested he sit his stepdaughter down for a heart to heart about the ordeal.

"NAH, and please read me out. Kids are fucking stupid and she is your kid. You raised her.

She is probably going through a lot of emotions right now about her “real” (I put that in quotes because he is a sperm donor and you are the father) dad because of actual social and societal pressures about birth fathers."

"But do you really want her to look back and see both a shitty sperm donor and an actual father? Or do you want her to look back after children (or not, even with aging and self reflection) and see a father who couldn’t talk to her about his concerns, and rather just canceled her wedding on her because she made a mistake.

You should sit her down and voice your concerns in an adult way, while still understanding her side."

Jootmill echoed the suggestion that he have a talk with his stepdaughter, but also noted that she is a full-grown adult, and choosing to include your mother's abuser at your wedding is a bold decision that merits consequences.

"He should definitely talk to her and explain how hard this all is for him and her mother (who is expected to just see her abuser play an important part of this wedding). That said, if the daughter is adamant then we need to remember she's the OP's kid but not an actual kid anymore. She's an adult. She makes her bed then she has to deal with the consequences."

bitchnutz08 empathized with the bride's thought pattern, and shared how emotionally complex these situations can be.

"I relate to this so much. My bio father was in and out of my life until I was a teenager when he became more of a regular presence. My step-dad was my constant and raised me without question. When it came time for someone to walk me down the isle, I wanted my step-dad to, but didn’t want to hurt my bio dad’s feelings. Instead of making a choice that would have hurt one of them, I chose them both to walk me down the isle together. The man who gave me life, and the main who helped me navigate through life. Although I love my bio dad, my step-dad means the world to me. He took a 3 year old little girl, and taught her that some men stay."

rambambambam pointed out how incredibly painful and retraumatizing the stepdaughter's decision is for her mother, the woman who has always been there for her.

"For real. I can accept that prison dad is a changed man, I can feel the daughters desire to reclaim the lost "father" (though the father that gave life in my mind is the one who fed, sheltered, loved and cared, not just nutted), but to just ignore mom's trauma here is really difficult for me to accept."

Midnightproxxima fully believes the daughter has made her bed of entitlement, and should lie in it.

"Why TF should he pay for the wedding? Let her 'bio dad' pay since he matters so much? If she wants to essentially give him a big fuck you in favor of her real dad then why should he still pull the money out for her?"

"She's a grown woman. Let her and her SO pool their money together and have something cheap."

In the end, it looks like the stepfather decided to still pitch in to the wedding, but abstain from attending in support of his wife.

"Edit: As some of you have suggested, I'll pay for the wedding, but I wont attend. I don't think my wife will attend and I think I should stay with her."

Kim Kardashian accused of cultural appropriation for 'Sunday Service' outfit. Not a great look.

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Cultural appropriation within the fashion world is a controversial subject. Style icons draw on a variety of inspirations for their __lewks__ and sometimes channel periods or cultures they don't belong to. For example, a LOT of celebrities wear corsets despite not being eighteenth-century courtesans - and yes, to answer your question, I'm counting waist trainers as corsets.

That's obviously a facetious example - but I DID wear bindis as a pre-teen to honor 90s-era Gwen Stefani, which makes me cringe in retrospect. Though Gwen came in contact with Indian culture - she dated Tony Kanal, No Doubt's Indian-American bassist, and learned about Indian aesthetics through his family - her appropriation of that 'accessory' wasn't, um, appropriate. And don't even get me started on the Harajuku wave of her career.

Kim Kardashian is the latest celebrity to come under fire for allegedly appropriating Indian culture with her fashion choices. She posted an outfit to Instagram yesterday that not everyone appreciated.

View this post on Instagram

Sunday Service Vibe 📷 @elirusselllinnetz

A post shared by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

Kim's headpiece created a stir among her followers, in addition to the weird-ass Photoshopped background.

Naturally, Kim had her defenders.

What say you, Internet? Did Kim appropriate Indian culture with her outfit? Or are people scrutinizing her look too much?

Harrowing post about surviving a school shooting goes viral, teaches the internet empathy.

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This is a difficult post to write, because I don't want to approach the subject matter in a flip or irreverent way. That would be disrespectful.

...y'all hear about these school shootings? How do the schools even SHOOT? Can buildings carry firearms in the United States? Because given how lax our gun control laws are, they might as well be able to.

Okay, that wasn't the right approach. Let's try this again: a Tumblr post is going viral for its heartbreakingly honest conveyance of surviving a school shooting. If you've experienced the same or similar gun violence, you might want to skip this one. Otherwise, it's absolutely worth reading.

Let's take a second to decompress after that.

Across the Internet, people were taken aback by its revealing nature and portrayal of life after a mass shooting. Fellow survivors could, sadly, relate.

Meanwhile, over in NRA Land, things remain trash:

18 hilarious tweets that capture the adulthood struggle.

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The adulthood struggle gets so real sometimes. Like, way too real.

The responsibilities and expectation to behave maturely are overwhelming sometimes. Stress is inevitable, especially if you're working full-time and/or raising kids. Luckily, humor provides the perfect antidote. The following tweets will make you laugh, and possibly feel personally attacked by their relatable nature. Enjoy! Oh, and don't forget to water your plants today.

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23 Memes Jesus Isn't Going To Be Happy You Laughed At.

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"If God’s got anything better than sex to offer, he’s certainly keeping it to himself."
- Sting

Yeah, sex is great and everything but have you ever tried laughing at memes? Give these hilariously raunchy memes a look. If they crack you up, congratulations you have an extremely dirty mind.

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Writer makes a list of traits all women have by age 35. A 'library of sighs,' check.

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If you're a woman who has made it to the age of 35, chances are you've seen some shit. And because of this, you navigate the world in a certain way, AKA like a boss. A tired, fed up boss, but a boss nonetheless.

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Feminist writer Anne Thériault tweeted a short list of things woman have developed by the age of 35, most notably a 'library of sighs.' I'm pretty sure every woman wakes up to a complimentary library card to this establishment on her 35th birthday.

People -- mainly woman 35 years and older -- were relating hard. And many had some things of their own they wanted to add to the list.

Some people who don't identify as women also saw themselves in the list.

Women who live with their pets also felt seen.

And everyone was on board in terms of the library of sighs.

See you at the library, y'all.

'Game of Thrones' cast surprises Kit Harrington during 'SNL' monologue. You know nothing, Jon Snow.

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The eighth season of Game of Thrones is just around the corner, and in case we weren't all excited enough, SNL decided to have Kit Harrington host this week. Harrington famously plays Jon Snow on GOT, the noble, stupidly sexy King of the North. For his SNL appearance, Harrington had shaved off his beard, giving us a "prepubescent Jon Snow" look, as he called it during his monologue.

Harrington nailed his opening monologue, and did so with a little help from his friends. A few minutes in, Harrington started taking questions from audience members. The first guy (Gary Richardson), like many of us, wanted Harrington to tell him how GOT ends. And when Harrington didn't give in, the next audience member chimed in. The twist? It was Emilia Clarke aka Daenerys Targaryen. Clarke also wanted to know how it all ends because she "forgot" and most of her scenes are with a dragon, which is "just a green screen and tennis ball," so she "has no idea what's going on."

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Harrington also took questions from co-stars John Bradley and Rose Leslie (who is also his wife), and from the Night King, played by Pete Davidson. Bradley and Davidson both wanted to continue to hang out after GOT wraps, and Leslie wanted to know how her husband planned to make money now that his big role was ending.

Some felt this was the role of a lifetime for Davidson, and we don't necessarily disagree.

Surprise appearances on SNL are always fun, and this was no exception. Kit Harrington was as charming as ever in his monologue, and his commitment to bits sustained throughout the episode. All hail the King of the North!

You can watch the full monologue here:

Man punishes his underage daughter for going on Tinder. The internet has some fire responses.

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Raising a teenager is one of life's greatest challenges, there's no doubt about that. Have you met teens? They are...a lot.

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Teenagers have the tendency to rebel, and figuring out how to handle this can be tricky. You need your kids to know that actions have consequences, but at the same time you don't want to push them away by being too strict.

A dad found himself in this conundrum when he caught his 16 year old daughter using Tinder on the phone he bought her. He gave her a pretty harsh punishment, which his wife didn't agree with, so he asked people via a Reddit post if he was being too harsh.

I could use a bit of perspective. My wife is saying I’m being overly harsh, but I think what I’m doing is completely justified. For reference, my daughter is 16 (edit: since I've gotten a few DMs, I don't really think it should matter but she's 17 in May).

I saw a phone left on the kitchen table when a red tinder notification showed up on my screen. I was in disbelief; I unlocked her phone (getting my fingerprint in her phone was the condition I had when giving her a phone at 14).

I dared not to venture into what kind of messages she was sending but I know she had over 2000 Tinder matches. I immediately marched into her room and asked her what the hell was this. She started screaming about me invading her privacy and I told her that I didn’t give a damn about her privacy on the phone that I bought her and that it is mine until further notice.

She’s was also grounded for a month and she has no access to her computer, except for a few select sites on my parental control. If she needed me to unblock a website, she’d have to ask. Regarding her social life, she cannot go out with friends nor go to any sports game besides her own (she runs track, which she allowed to continue throughout her grounding). That I will be picking her up for practice every day. If she were to violate any of these rules, or if I EVER see her on an app like Tinder until she’s 18, that all of these changes will be permanent.

When my wife heard about the situation, she thought I was being too harsh, and that maybe it should last for the next 3 days. I apologized for punishing our daughter without discussing it with her first, but I feel shortening it at this point will just be undermining my authority, and teaching her that she can get away with having Tinder and other apps and only risking a weekend’s worth of punishment. She reluctantly agreed that what’s done was done, but still maintained that it was being a pretty big reaction and to consider shortening it.

Honestly when I made the punishment, I thought it was too lenient. She’s a minor, on an 18+ app, matching with guys who either don’t know she’s a minor (really bad) or guys that do (really bad). She needs to be taught a lesson. I'm also installing parental controls where she would need permission to download any app when she gets her phone back until she's 18.

AITA for how I’m handling the situation?

*AITA stands for "Am I the Asshole?"

The internet responded, and people had mixed reactions. Some thought this dad had every right to punish his daughter.

SaddensMe said:

I’m sorry but you are allowed to have control over what your daughter does and doesn’t do on her phone. Since Tinder is a dating site for ADULTS she could’ve easily gotten herself in unwanted situations. She might be 16, but she’s still a minor and ; therefor, she shouldn’t be on tinder. You gave her a punishment that you found proper, maybe you should’ve talked to your wife about it first, but you don’t know what she could’ve been doing on there.

Also, it was a phone you bought for her, it’s a thing for parents to look through a kids phone a little to make sure they aren’t doing anything stupid.

black_and_shredded was also with the dad on this one:

I’m genuinely shocked that this is the right answer; agree 100% that NTA. A high school sophomore is NOT the appropriate age to be swiping right on tinder. I can understand it might look “cool” in some of these girl’s eyes, but that’s not stopping the innocent (or less-innocent) dudes from sleeping with a minor.

truth0907 had some different ideas:

I agree with everything you're saying except I think it should be ESH.

Isn't OP's method of punishment quite assholish? I mean a month of grounding (to the extent OP describes, i.e. no social life and the "parental controls") is admittably extreme and as a victim of a similar circumstance I really don't believe it is effective. Incapacitation is not generally effective at preventing recidivism, at least in criminal offenders.

I think OP could have a much larger impact on his/her daughter by rather educating her on the dangers of her actions and the possible consequences of committing those actions again. I think parents often think if they teach children that there are consequences to disobeying their instructuons then the children will learn that there are consequences to disobeying other rules/instructions and thus be "better" people. As a member of the new generation I really don't think that is as effective as we think. Children of controlling parents learn to lie better because at the end of the day we want to do what we think is right, not what someone else simply says is right.

If OP educates the daughter maybe she will actually believe that what she did was wrong. If he grounds her for a month maybe she will believe what she did was wrong, or maybe she will resent him for controlling her and learn to be more sneaky so OP cannot control her actions in the future.

I say ESH because he is infringing her rights through his method of punishment, and that the method is not respectful. I believe a parent-child relationship needs respect both ways just like any other relationship does.

*ESH stands for "Everyone sucks here."

This_Interests_Me thought the punishment was too extreme:

To add to that, kids who get punished to the extreme learn to be sneakier. Don’t expect any level of trust from your daughter for now on. When she wants to do something that you might not like, she’ll be “sleeping over her friends house”. I spent my entire teenage years becoming an expert in lying to my parents.

AliceMadder also didn't agree with the form of punishment:

I feel like the tone of the punishment is wrong, in the sense that she didn't do something malicious, she did something dangerous.

derbyhill gave some reasoning as to why being too strict can be bad:

I have friends who's parents where very strict or controling when they where teens which meant they rebeled harder and where excellent at covering up but ultimately because of this they ended up in dangerous situations where they didn't call there parents for help and after the fact felt like they couldn't tell their parents what had happened so they're still trying to deal with the trauma (ie only starting to talk about it and consider help, plus their parents still are in the dark) nearly ten years later.

LaDiDaLady had a very balanced response:

NAH. You are right to worry about your daughter being on adult dating sites, it is dangerous and inappropriate. She is a child living in your home and under your care. These are relatively routine punishments for a teenager, but your wife is right that you shouldn't implement them without discussing it with her. It sounds like you have come to a resolution there with her, which is great.

HOWEVER

Even if you are NTA, I think you should still consider that your course of action may not be advisable. Your daughter will probably be safer in the long run if she believes you are someone she can come to for help, rather than someone who will punish her for making mistakes. If someone tries to assault her at a party, don't you want her to be comfortable calling you for help? Or do you want her remembering the time dad was so mad about an app and staying in a dangerous situation? She obviously has no real understanding of the long term results of this type of behavior or she wouldn't be doing it.

Having been one, I can tell you teenage girls are vulnerable, often fragile, going through formative years cementing their beliefs about themselves, their families, their sexualities, etc. Whether you like it or not, it is very normal for her to be experimenting, and while you are right to want to protect her from dangerous situations, you cannot teach her to be a smart adult by just telling her she did something bad and making her resent you. If your goal is to protect her and raise her to be a proper adult, rather than punish her (out of spite or whatever), deeper conversations are in order here, about consent, autonomy, the internet, predators, what have you.

Punishment may still be in order, but it won't resolve the fundamental issue here. Only education and perspective for your daughter will.

Good luck! Teens are tough.

What do you think? Was he being too harsh? Let us know in the comments!

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23 Memes That Will Only Be Funny If You're Married.

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"I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life”

-Rita Rudner

Anyone who's ever said, "I do," will crack up at these hilarious marriage memes. If your spouse doesn't find these jokes funny, it's probably time to call a lawyer.

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They all randomly dance in their underwear, right? Right? 😬😂

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Viral video of two men ditching a female sports news anchor has the internet cry-laughing.

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Get ready for maybe the funniest and most confusing thing that has ever graced the internet.

In a tweet posted by Dan Critchlow, a writer for the soccer site, "The Daily Cannon" , an interview about soccer gets more awkward than a middle school dance make out session with braces. There's truly no way to describe this exchange, but Critchlow comparing the moment to how most men treat women who discuss soccer is so staggeringly accurate it hurts my bones.

Naturally, the internet had a lot of questions. Was she supposed to follow them? Was this a joke? Did they truly just want to walk away from her entirely?

Critchlow offered some insight into the incident:

The woman in the video, Kelly Cates, who works for Sky Sports Football, explained the situation:

But it didn't stop people from laughing:

Critchlow then used the viral tweet to tag his favorite female football fans! Yay Critchlow! Use your platform for good!

Of course, sexist trolls will always be trolling:

I've watch this video maybe 50+ times and it doesn't stop being the funniest thing I've seen in months.

Thank you, Critchlow, for finding a way to make sports the funniest things on Twitter.

This Iowa man's obituary went viral for its hilariously savage honesty.

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Traditionally, obituaries are concisely worded farewells. Your run-of-the-mill obituary includes a short list of the close friends and family members the deceased left behind, there are a few sentences summing up their general interests and hobbies, and it's signed off with some manner of releasing the dead to God, or the abyss, depending on religious status.

One of the reasons for this predictable formality is the word-by-word cost of obituaries, which places a monetary pressure to keep it short and sweet. But now, with the popularity of online obituaries and guest books, people have a lot more freedom to say good bye in style, the way a deceased loved one would really want to be remembered.

In a prime example of the internet era of farewells, a recent obituary for an Iowa man went viral for its refreshing and at times cutting honesty.

The Schluter Balik Funeral home entry for recently deceased Iowa man Tim Schrandt didn't pull any punches, and according to its description neither did he during his lifetime.

"Tim Schrandt, age 63, of Spillville, IA died on Friday, March 29, 2019 at Gundersen Health System in LaCrosse, WI after a short battle with cancer."

"A funeral service will be held at 11:00 a.m., Thursday, April 4, 2019 at the St. Wenceslaus Catholic Church in Spillville with Deacon Pat Malanaphy presiding, burial will be in the church cemetery with full military rites.

Visitation will be from 3:00 – 7:00 p.m. on Wednesday, April 3, 2019 at the St. Wenceslaus Catholic Church in Spillville and also after 10:00 a.m. at the Church on Thursday morning."

"Tim Schrandt (Lynyrd) made his last inappropriate comment on March 29, 2019. If you are wondering if you may have ever met him, you didn't -because you WOULD remember. For those of you that did meet him, we apologize, as we're sure he probably offended you. He was world renowned for not holding back and telling it like it is."

The memoriam kicked off by apologizing to everyone Tim offended throughout his lifetime, of which there were many.

"Tim was born to William (Bill) Schrandt and Mary (Schrandt) Manning on June 11,1955 - 100 years too late. Given Tim's demeanor he would have been the perfect weathered cowboy in the old west or rough and tough pioneer, or maybe he just should have been Amish."

"Tim was the 4th of 8 kids, the bottom rung of the top tier (the big kids). Instead of taking his place on that rung, listening to the older kids and doing as he was told by his older siblings, he decided to anoint himself "king" of the 4 little kids. Tim spent his childhood and early adulthood ordering them around and in general, tormenting them. He was a great orator, (not like Shakespear, but more like Yogi Berra), as he always had something to say,
and always had to get in the last word."

It went on to detail how he terrorized everyone from his younger siblings to the nuns at his private school, one of whom he fist fought.

"His position as "king" and orator was challenged by the nuns at St. Wenceslaus school in Spillville. He may have met his match. We’re not saying the nuns won, but they put up a good fight, we mean literally - he got into a fist-a-cuff with a nun. In fairness, she probably started it. You didn't take a swing at Tim and not expect one back. Tim's fondness for authority (his own - not others) followed him to South Winneshiek High School in Calmar and later into the Army. This provided for many interesting episodes and stories, detentions and demotions, and a few "run ins" with the law, not just locally, but globally."

"Tim worked at Camcar/Stanley Black and Decker in Decorah as a tool and die maker for 30 plus years. Tim worked with many friends and “a bunch of morons”. His words, not ours. Well not exactly his, words because that would have included a bunch of swear words."

The obituary also took a few sentences to roast the "hell of a lof of stuff" he left behind, before making it clear the family doesn't need all that junk.

"Tim leaves behind a hell of a lot of stuff that his family doesn't know what to do with. So, if you are looking for a Virgin Mary in a bathtub shrine (you Catholics know what we’re talking about) you should wait the appropriate amount of time and get in touch with them.

Tomorrow would be fine."

"In addition to his stuff he leaves behind two great boys who he was extremely proud of, Cody (Jenny) Schrandt and Josh (Lydia) Schrandt were the product of his marriage to Crystal Hilmer. He will be missed by his two granddaughters that he adored and taught to cuss, Peyton and MacKenna. Also left to keep the stories alive (but damn, there won"t be any new material) are his mother Mary Manning and siblings Mike (Rita Dixon) Schrandt, Marty (Clint) Berg, Becky Schrandt-Miles, Bill (Grease) Schrandt, Pam (Rick) Barnes, Peter (Sandra) Schrandt and many nieces, nephews and cousins that wanted to hang out near him, because you just knew he was going to say or do something good. It’s not that he was such a great storyteller, it’s that he WAS the story!"

"To his siblings amazement he was actually able to snag a good woman, Cheryl Murray, and hold on to her for the past 13 years, and as far as we know restraints were not used. Tim also created great memories and stories for Cheryl’s kids Alex (Christina) Murray and Samantha (Evan) Luedking and grandkids Tatum and Grace."

The obituary also joked that his already deceased relatives will be happy to see him, since he always brought the beer to family gatherings.

"He will be having a reunion with his infant daughter Ashley, his brother Duke, his dad Bill Schrandt, many aunts and uncles and a handful of cousins that passed before him. Tim was in charge of getting the beer and ice for our family reunions, so they will be happy to see him."

"A common line in obituaries is “He never met a stranger”, in Tim’s case he never met a rule he couldn’t break, a boundary he couldn’t push, a line he couldn’t cross and a story he couldn’t stretch. Another common obituary phrase is “He’d give the shirt off his back”, well Tim was prepared to do that, and he could do it quickly, because he always wore his shirts
unbuttoned ¾ the way down. Tim was anything but common!"

"Despite his crusty exterior, cutting remarks and stubbornness, there is actual evidence that he was a loving, giving and caring person. That evidence is the deep sorrow and pain in our hearts that his family feels from his passing."

The dedication DID return to traditional obituary form when the author admitted Tim was in fact loving and would be missed.

"Tim led a good life and had a peaceful death - but the transition was a bitch. And for the record, he did not lose his battle with cancer. When he died, the cancer died, so technically it was a tie! He was ready to meet his Maker, we're just not sure "The Maker" is ready to meet Tim."

The cherry on top of the obituary is a the final paragraph, which gives a shout out to G. Heileman Brewing Co, who the author laments has now lost a prime customer.

"Good luck God!

We are considering establishing a Go-Fund-Me account for G. Heileman Brewing Co., the brewers of Old Style beer, as we anticipate they are about to experience significant hardship as a result of the loss of Tim"s business. Keep them in your thoughts."

RIP Tim Schrandt, I have a feeling you'd be honored to know how much of the internet has been exposed to your shenanigan via this obituary.

21 people share things the internet killed that they miss. R.I.P., books.

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The internet is a wonderful cyber space where we all spent way too much time. It has made all of our lives dramatically easier as we can deliver our friends a message in seconds, call a car to our exact location without using our voice, and scroll through the joy of memes. If ancient people saw how we live now, they would assume we all signed deals with the devil in exchange for dark magical powers.

Between Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Youtube, Netflix, Hulu, Amazon and Twitter--most of us don't realize how important the internet is to our everyday existence. Our bosses can be in constant communication with us, the family group chat can't be ignored, and dating is a whole lot harder. While life is a more efficient now, it's nice to look back and remember the time when you had to drive to a store if you wanted to watch a movie instead of mindlessly scrolling through the complicated web of Netflix from your couch.

That's why, when a recent Reddit user asked, "What’s something the internet killed that you miss?" people were happy to take a trip down memory lane.

1. Yes, "Shittsuperintendent."

Photo albums. My parents have all these awesome albums from when they were kids, and then when they got married and then from my childhood. I love leafing through them when I’m at their house.

My own photos are all on Facebook or Instagram and it’s not the same at all.

2. The internet made us all cranky old men, "IncognetoMagneto."

Being off the grid. Internet and cell phones ruined it. Nothing stresses me out more than a string of texts in the morning. I feel like I have to check it in case it’s work related. Email used to be fun. Now it’s just a series of people needing something from me or trying to sell me something. Maybe I’m just an old cranky man.

3. This sounds fun, "User1539."

BBS systems.

When I was a kid there were local Bulletin Board Systems. We chatted, we left messages, arranged Doom death matches and played Door games.

Then you'd see those people in real life, at school and user meetups. It was all local.

4. Throwback, "11never."

Just going over to your friends house or the park unannounced to see if they were there and hang out.

5. R.I.P., Blockbuster, "Ad4lYl."

I miss the feeling of walking into a blockbuster but still appreciate the convenience of streaming

6. Memories, "Pontarossa."

AOL chatrooms.

Around 2006-ish, the internet moved from being a way to talk to new people to a way to keep talking to people you already know. That's super useful and all, but there was a lot to be said for building friendships with total strangers who you only knew by a username, but would still chat to every night. It was part of the internet of discovery rather than the internet of familiarity.

I miss it, at times. It was nice to have it be so easy to build those connections.

7. Damn, "ButterBuddha."

Geocities, 1996

8. This was old-school Youtube, "ZanyDelaney."

User generated web content with no thought to advertising, search engine optimisation, monetising.

9. This sounds so much more complicated than Googling, "yordl."

My dad says he misses having arguments with friends which could only be resolved by phoning whoever was most knowledgeable on a subject e.g. Did you know lightning travels upwards? No it goes down! Let's phone your dad, he's a meteorologist.

10. Yard sales were the best, "danni_shadow."

Yard sales, garage sales and flea markets.

People still have them, but it's way harder to find stuff at a good price. Ebay and Amazon have ruined that, because everybody just looks up what things are selling for. And sometimes Ebay is ridiculously inflated.

I found a rare Nerf gun that we had been looking for at a flea market once, and the lady was charging $150, because that was the going rate on Ebay. People are always selling action figures in crappy condition for $20, because they don't realize that that price is mint-in-box, and all of the arms and legs are required. Like, I just wanna grab a TMNT toy for my kids. I'm not paying $20 for your broken toy.

It used to be about persistence and digging up a good deal somewhere. Now, I may as well just buy it off of Ebay. The cost is the same and my house smells better than most of the people at the flea markets...

11. It's the Tinder takeover, "StorybookNelson."

It makes me feel so weird that the way my husband and I dated back in the day doesn't even exist anymore. We're not even that old.

12. Gotta love party tricks, "c-student."

Having a mental catalog of great jokes that most people hadn't heard. It was so much fun to drop a few at parties and get some laughs.

13. So true, "deusdragon."

Book stores and music stores.

The feeling of walking into a Borders and browsing the eternally high bookshelves can't be topped.

14. Hence, the flat-Earth theory. "NaabeGetOnSkype."

If you were exceedingly dumb or had terrible ideas, your reach was really only your direct circle of friends. Now idiots can broadcast their ideas across the planet with a click

15. Bummer, "TrustWorthyJudas."

At disney land, after you had ridden on the Haunted Mansion ride, you could ask a member of staff to provide you with a special secret "death certificate" to say that you died on the ride (obviously its not legally binding) it was a secret but when i was younger and visited disney land my mother heard someone request itand after asking them about it, then we all got one.

Unfortunately with the advent of the internet the secret got out and too many people were asking for death certificate, so disney in their infinite wisdom scrapped the little easter egg, i've since lost mine and had one day hoped to get one for my child.

16. Totally, "-eDgAR-."

There is now a work culture of always being reachable by email or text for whatever happens. A lot of places expect you to be pretty much on call even when you're not at the office anymore. I worked at an ad agency where days off sometimes didn't even feel like that, because I would still be getting emails about things and was expected to be checking them. There should be some level of balance between work and personal life and I feel like that is fading because so many places are adapting this type of culture, especially start-ups.

17. Totally, "SuperKeeg."

Saturday Morning Cartoons. As I get older, I realize the ritual of a thing is just as important as the actual thing itself. It's not just about the cartoons. Watching them as an adult, many of the cartoons from the 80's and early 90's we're terrible. Rather it was the "event" of Saturday Morning Cartoons that I miss.

My daughters can watch whatever they want whenever they want to watch it. They don't know what it is like to have to wait for a week for a new episode. They usually just binge their shows whenever they want. If my kids want to spend the entire weekend watching My Little Pony, they can. And they can to it the week after, too. They don't know what it is like to miss an episode of Power Rangers because it was now scheduled at 7am instead of 6:30 and I had to leave for school.

They also don't have to watch TV together. They can just watch whatever on their phones or tablets or on the TV in the living room. NOTHING (except my wife and I) stop them from consuming the specific entertainment that they want.

18. Too real, "Semi_HadrOn."

My eyesight.

19. Wow yeah, "GaryHorning0."

Going through life without worrying about somebody taking a video of you and positing it for everybody to see.

20. What are "books? "spendor_phines."

Reading a book before bed. Now I mostly surf the web until I get tired.

21. Yes, "Ad4lYl."

I miss when concerts didn't have a sea of people filming a video from their phone

21. Yup, "BreachBangnClear."

I can’t describe the joy I felt walking into a Blockbuster on a Friday night hoping the new movie I wanted to rent wasn’t sold out. And getting overpriced movie snacks while waiting in line.


40 girls ask their brothers 'how do I look' and get roasted in response.

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Brothers are the worst. Anyone unfortunate enough to have a brother knows they were placed on this earth to roast you and embarrass you in front of your friends, and for the most part, they deliver without fail.

If God is real, (s)he placed brothers on this earth as an endless humbling reminder that we aren't all that, and at the end of the day it's probably healthy to have the perspective check. Unfortunately, the humbling roasts don't work on everyone, Charlie Sheen has two brothers and is still a sentient piece of misogynist debris with the confidence levels of a sultan.

But the rest of us have taken some tumbles after a well-placed brother diss. In fact, the Twitter user @syrianting prompted a whole thread of girls getting roasted by their brothers.

"If you ever wanna be humbled, ask your brother how you look," she wrote.

Soon after, young women posted screenshots of their brothers' responses to unsolicited selfies, and these 40 tweets pretty much sum up the nature of brother/sister relationships. A few of the brothers are sweet, but most of them go in.

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This student tried to flex her prom night on Twitter and even FAFSA savagely trolled her.

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Teenagers these days can't go one minute without posting their entire lives to social media. However, one student learned a pretty important lesson that when you're trying to get scholarships, it might not be the best look to post a video of your crew on a rooftop with stacks of cash, a Mercedes Benz and a Hollywood-ready gown.

When worldwideliz tweeted this fully over-the-top prom video, it immediately went viral.

If this is what prom looks like for teens now, I definitely missed out. I took a yellow school bus to my prom, wore a dress from Macy's and I'm pretty sure there was a buffet of cold pasta in the corner. Where did the Mercedes come from? What is this rooftop? Are all of her friends royals? To give them credit, they all look amazing.

There were some haters:

It wasn't long before a few people remembered this young woman is still in high school, and if she's making such amazing videos she's probably working hard in school as well. As we learned from the Aunt Becky scandal, colleges are pretty into rich kids so this might not be a problem for her. Maybe they should've thrown some fake rowing photos in this video?

And it wasn't long before the official account for Federal Student Aid responded:

Good luck, girl! Remember to call up Aunt Becky if you need her.

20 people share the 'saddest' things they've done to avoid socializing. Introverts, take notes.

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Whether you live in a big city where you're constantly crowded, an apartment with multiple roommates (or your own family), or a small town where everyone knows your name, it's likely you need serious emotional recharge time.

Oftentimes, our living circumstances and daily routines make it difficult to get that much needed alone time. So, we use creative and seemingly wild methods in order to get a few hours of silence.

In a recent Reddit thread, people shared the saddest and weirdest things they've done to avoid socializing or running into acquaintances, and honestly some of them are very savvy.

1. GODSPEED_98 takes a different route to class.

"Yup. I have class at 11:00am so I leave my house at 10:45 to walk to campus. I used to cross the crosswalk, go straight past a couple of small restaurants, then take a left to get to campus, but I always ended up crossing paths with my friends, so now I cross the crosswalk and weave through the back alleys of the restaurants so I don’t have to talk to them on my way to school."

2. Spasay moved to a new apartment to get away from coworkers.

"One of the reasons I was "for" moving to our new apartment was because too many of my coworkers lived near the old one....only to discover that another coworker lives in the new area, plus another is moving in across the street.

I'm going to have to start going to work at 6 a.m. to avoid crossing paths..."

3. PonerBenis would sit in the car for hours.

"Used to live with super outgoing roommates. When I heard people come over, I'd take a shower, get dressed like I was going somewhere, get in my car, drive to go get food somewhere, then sit in the parking lot eating my food and listening to music for a few hours.

They actually used to complain I was always too busy to hang out with them."

4.CMDRTheDarkLord pretends to be on conference calls when they run into people.

"Pro-tip: pretend to be on a conference call. Say something as if you're already deep in conversation.

"No Steve, have another look at the slide deck I sent out before this call. You'll see that it's a good idea, but it won't work in this case"

Then keep walking."

5. epictshirting doesn't even interact with delivery people.

"Ask the pizza delivery boy to leave the pizza outside and paid for it under the door."

6. HumanSingularity420 played spontaneous hooky.

"I just flat out walked out of high school mid-day. I had no plan, just wandering for 3 hours panicking over what was going to happen. But I'd had enough."

7. badnewzero is a fan of the Irish Goodbye.

"I used to do this at parties every now and then. Just up and leave. Couldn't even tell people I was going. A friend tried to forcibly stop me once, and I got him in a headlock and threatened to smash his head in.

It's like I had a social interaction health bar and it just zeroed out."

8. Dr_Talent kept a pee bottle in their room.

"Peeing in a bottle in my bedroom so I wouldn't have to walk by the people in my living room to get to the bathroom."

9. notyourcoloringbook has literally climbed out the window to avoid her roommates.

"I have climbed out my bedroom window and peed outside to avoid people. I’m a girl, and it was still worth it."

10. WeddingSinger2017 makes themselves throw up to avoid socializing.

"I used to be able to make myself puke simply by eating too much cheese. So if I didn't want to go somewhere, I would eat a lot of cheese and have to cancel the plans."

11. Mithrandir_The_Gray has hidden in the bathroom quite a lot.

"Letting the water run, so it seems like I am doing something in there and even sitting on the toilet pretending to be taking a shit."

12. timetobeatthekids has to make up excuses.

"I think the worst of it is just outright lying to my friends.

I know they'd be fine with me just saying "Nah, I'm antisocial as fuck and don't wanna go out", but I feel compelled to make up some bullshit anyway."

13. dotnetdr pretended to have another part time job to avoid their roommate.

"Lived with one other roommate. He thought I had a part time job in the evenings which I didn’t. I used to listen quietly to a little tv with headphones in my room all night. Did not venture into the common areas. Think I remember peeing into bottles also. I just wanted him to think I was at work and did not want to socialize in any way with him. Once he went to bed I came out of my room quietly. Went to the front door made noise and pretended to ‘come home’."

14. Lurkymclurkering had to stow themselves away at a church.

"Couple of weeks ago, had a compete and utter panic attack in a church. Found an unoccupied room, locked the door, turned the lights out, and sat on the floor in a ball wedged between a couch and fake tree until I could calm down a bit and do grounding exercises. Took nearly an hour."

15. Swords_and_Sims4 uses sign language to get people to leave them alone.

"Learned just enough sign language that if anybody tried to talk to me i could just sign some random words/phrases and they'd leave me alone. I then became terrified of running into someone who actaully knew ASL and them calling my bluff."

"To be clear at no point did i ever claim to be deaf or mute, I live in the south were strangers are way to friendly and will talk to anyone no matter how uncomfortable they are and wanted a way out."

16. thatknifegirl finds the animals at every event.

"I always look for animals at networking events that I can socialize with instead of with people."

17. cnfit has a whole workplace plan.

"I will literally physically go out of my way not to talk to people that i know will try to start a conversation with me. Some examples...

Whenever I'm about to leave work at the same time the guy next to me is, ill just sit there prentending to work on something until he is gone so we dont walk out together."

"If i see someone just far enough behind me to miss the elevtaor if i call it and spam the close door button, ill start fast-walking as soon as i turnthe corner to the elevtaor and do just that. If there's not enough distance between us, ill walk the 3 flights of stairs instead. Quickly."

"If im going down the stairs to leave and hear the door on the floor below me open (someone else leaving), ill stop on the stairs and let them get down a flight so we dont have to say hello in the stairwell."

"If i am on my way to the bathroom and i see someone enter who will likely start up a conversation with me in there, i have a fake phone conversation outside of the bathroom or hide behind a nearby half-wall until i hear them leave the bathroom and then go in."

"If i see the car of the receptionist who likes to talk to me in the parking lot, ill walk around the building and enter through the facility's side door instead of passing by her desk in the main lobby."

"If someone is already at the printer that i need to use, i will pass by and act like im on the way to a meeting until i hear their print job stop. Then I'll turn around and print (instead of the BS small talk at the printer. Hur dur, how many trees you killing? Hur dur).

Hard to believe i have ANY friends, isn't it?"

18. drifter137 grocery shops in the middle of the night.

"Best thing I found out, for while you are working on lowering your anxiety, is to find a grocery store that is open 24/7, and then go late at night, if you are able. A lot less people, and a lot less anxiety."

19. tokki1987 hid in a closet to avoid an ex friend.

"Many years ago my childhood best friend and I had a huge falling out. She had been living with me and I asked her to leave. The day she came to get her things, I couldn't stand to face her, so I hid in the back closet while she and another of her friends gathered her things. Think I was in there about half and hour, waiting until I couldn't hear them anymore."

20. lolz91 would go hungry.

"I lived with a bunch of super emotional, super talkative people once. I enjoyed their company, some of the time. However, when things got awkward, I’d hide in my room, lock the door, and just not eat or drink until I absolutely had to so I wouldn’t have to see them. They could be quite catty.

TLDR: Starvation."

27 Workplace Memes Everyone Should Laugh At By 5pm.

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"Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?"

- Edgar Bergen

Work sucks and then you die. Stop slaving away for a minute and start laughing at these hilarious workplace memes. It sure beats crying in the bathroom.

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Instagram account brilliantly trolls pastors who live Kardashian lifestyles on God's dime.

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The latest viral Instagram account was inspired by swagged out pastors wearing designer clothing, a combination that is sadly more common than you'd think. The aptly named PreachersNSneakers screenshots photos of popular pastors (many of whom are celebrity status) next to the price tags of their clothing.

The result, can easily be translated as an indictment against those preaching generosity while living luxuriously off a congregation's hard earned coin.

Either that, or it's a niche fashion blog for people who have been silently hoping they'd see more pastors get into modeling.

Understandably, there are a lot of different ways to respond to this Instagram. A lot of people scroll through it as an absurdist comedy of sorts, a visual reminder of how even religion is influenced by capitalism and influencer culture.

Several people on the Instagram account have also pointed out the fact that many of the popular celebrity pastors feed themselves off of book deals and investments, so while they might be living lavishly and profiting off their status, they aren't directing funding it via the church itself.

Even in cases where the pastors aren't funding a designer lifestyle directly from the church, there are ethical questions around living a wealthy lifestyle while preaching about justice, love and equality.

Where is the line between taking advantage of your position in religion, and contradicting the very text you're preaching? This is just one of the questions this Instagram is posing, in the funniest way possible.

While the account is getting a lot of thoughtful and funny engagement from both atheists and religious people, not all of the pastors are on board for getting put on blast.

The most recent post revealed a DM from one of the pastors, who said he paid for none of his clothing himself.

View this post on Instagram

Would you classify yourself as...mad bro?

A post shared by PreachersNSneakers (@preachersnsneakers) on

Ironically, the account itself doesn't technically debate whether the pastors pay for the clothing out of pocket or receive them for promotion, it just presents them with expensive swag and lets commenters do the rest. So in that sense, any pastors who lurk the page are invited to spill their own tea.

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