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21 people who've gone through crazy hazing rituals or initiations share their stories.

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Hazing is supposed to be fun and entertaining for everyone involved, except of course, the person being hazed.

Whether for a fraternity, sorority, the army, or another exclusive organization, hazing rituals run the gamut from funny and inventive, to borderline violent and traumatic, and in all cases, the memories are hard to scrub from your brain.

In a popular Reddit thread, people shared the craziest hazing rituals they've witnessed or gone through personally, and the only appropriate response is "yikes."

1. From trackerjack:

A guy I used to row with had a pretty crazy novice initiation at his old club. They would blindfold the first year guys and throw them in a dark closet which was empty except for a strobe light, a fog machine, a stereo blasting "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor" or something similar, and a pile of Skittles. They would then scream at the new guy to sort them into piles by color, and lock him in.

They would come back in after ten minutes and usually the kid would have some semblance of piles. But one time, they came back and the kid had just spread them out and was sitting there crying.

They were shocked and started yelling at him again, "WTF is this?" "This is garbage" etc.

And through his tears, the kid says, "I'm colorblind!"

They felt pretty bad and let him do something else.

Edit: forgot about the fog machine. Definitely increases the difficulty.

2. From moby__dick:

In the army we used new guys for radar tests. So we could track them, we wrapped them head to toe in aluminum foil. We even made a foil mask. The we gave them a walkie talkie and had them run, stop, walk slowly, run some more so we could track them.

Of course, there was no radar test and you can't track aluminum foil anyway, so we just had new guys in foil suits... And foil masks with eyeholes... Running all over the base. Good. Stop there. Now wave your arms and jump up and down. Calibrating.... now jump higher. Good."

3. From pharabius:

A rather notorious sorority at my college made new initiates call their boyfriends/love interests and have phone sex with them, with everyone listening. The boyfriends would have to be told after the call was over.

While this is not physically all that harmful, it ended a lot of relationships/created permanent trust issues, and is really just quite cruel in my opinion.

4. From cheeseyitem:

There is some ridiculous sh*t at my uni that sports clubs do for initiations (or adoptions as they're now called to get around the rules). The rugby club is banned from the SU for an initiation ritual in which they would hold freshers over the edge of the terrace bar (first floor balcony with brick underneath) by their ankles and make them whack pints.

The football club can't hold adoptions in the SU, last year there was a choice between playing soggy biscuit, downing a pint from a shoe with a live goldfish in or shaving your head. I was surprised to see a large number of footballers still with hair the day after.

5. From snowpup:

I was in a fraternity in college. Our house was off campus and the front yard had a nice big elevated porch, so when you stood on it, you overlooked a big front yard from 8-10 feet up. We would play American Gladiators Assault with the pledges as contestants. The real game looks like this.

So we would set up the front yard with tables, mattresses, whatever we could find to create the course. Pledges then ran through the course while we shot at them with a paintball gun. At each barrier, they had eggs they could throw back at the shooter. A bit unfair, but they were pledges. Anyway if you got shot, you had to slam a beer and start over. If you made it through to the end you were done. If you hit the shooter with an egg, he become a temporary pledge and had to run the course until he made it through.

Not all hazing is death and injuries. This was fun as f*ck, for both pledges and brothers.

6. From bigtonto0131:

This wasn't me but was something my brother did. When he was in college in a fraternity he use to make one pledge come over to his place ever day to do "human alarm clock." The kid would sit next to his bed and wait until 7AM to gently awake my brother for his class, if he smacked him on the head that meant snooze for 5 minutes. After my brother woke up it was then the pledge's job to go sit on the toilet bowl to get the seat warmed up for him.

7. From BlueMacaw:

The worst hazing ritual I've personally witnessed was a 6’4" shirtless hulk of a man braced/held down while two other men used a blow torch to heat up a branding iron with the organization's symbol. As soon as the branding iron was glowing red, they put a hood on the initiant's head... then pulled an identical branding iron out of a bucket of ice water and pressed it to his chest.

8. From Diredoe:

My first job was as a cashier in a small family-owned grocery store. Apparently, the stock boys had a tradition that went back years where they'd tell the new guy that one of his jobs is to shake up the Italian dressing bottles every couple hours. It makes them look better, after all! The owners were in on it, so they'd give them sh*t for it.

9. From squibulch:

A guy that lived in my dorm freshman year pledged a fraternity that same year, and he had 5 other guys in his "pledge class". One of their tasks was to complete a 500-piece puzzle in a pitch-dark bathroom with nothing but the assistance of two bic lighters.

10. From BackJurden:

Semi-related but I thought I'd share anyways:

Back in college, I jokingly made a rumor that a rival fraternity would buy watermelons for their pledges and time them having sex with said watermelons. The closest your time was to another brother was who your big became in the fraternity. The person who lasted the longest then would have to eat the cum soaked food.

Eventually this became such a well-known rumor it became accepted as fact and the fraternity had to make an effort to tell potentials and girls that they in fact, did not duck watermelons.

Ah, good times.

11. From co0p3r:

I used to work as a rigging technician in the movie industry. All the equipment had funny names so a new guy wouldn't think twice if you asked him to go fetch something that doesn't exist. A popular one is the "long weight".

He'll go to the truck or store and ask whoever is there where the long weight is. If the guy is in on it, his response will be something to the effect of "ok, just hang on over here and I'll go fetch it for you"... and then just leave him there while everyone else uses the radio to harass him to hurry up. Other popular fictional items include "sky hooks", tins of "elbow grease" and packets of "grinding sparks".

12. From Andrw_Ryan:

The basketball team of one of our rival schools had a hazing ritual where they played ookie cookie (when everyone jerks off on an Oreo and the last one to cum has to eat the jizz soaked cookie). They got caught, big news story and stuff. During our game against that team someone handed out Oreos to the other teams fan section.

13. From bayganbohagan:

I work in a restaurant. Whenever we get a new busboy, at the end of the night we tell him to make sure the Pilot Light is working for the Ice Machine. They spend 15 mintues trying to figure it out and asking managers for help. It is great.

14. From InfoSponger:

Stripped naked and thrown in the trunk of a car. Driven 20 miles from campus. Once removed from trunk, smeared with sheep blood from head to toe. A bloody hatchet super glued to hand and told to get home by midnight.

15. From Newell2:

I wasn't involved in this organization but they did it the best ways I've heard. They would give you tasks, where you could do it the dumb way which was harder, or if you were clever take an easy way out.

The best example I have is they separated a group of 12, 6 in a small room with a window leading outside to each. And they placed a keg in the room and said they couldn't leave until it was gone. One group attempted to drink the whole thing, the other group placed it outside the one story building window and left the room.

16. From Gingergurl63:

There's a frat at my school that makes all the pledges go into the basement and get on their hands a knees. The pledges have to push a coin across the floor with their nose. Not the worst thing that goes on by far, but pretty funny.

There's a sorority on campus that is on probation because they made their pledges sort sprinkles and blow up balloons. They gave them ice cream afterwards, but apparently one girl had a panic attack.

17. From i_could_be_an_idiot:

I was blindfolded, lead in to a bathroom and been told to sit on the ground. A brother asked how far I'd be willing to go to get initiated in the fraternity. I said I'd do anything, and he forced my hands into the toilet. So I'm sitting there, elbow deep in the frat house shitter, wondering what the f*ck is happening.

He says "Grab it,".... I was in disbelief. The soft, mushy turd spurts between my fingers as I clench it in my hand. "Bite it. If you want to get in, you have to bite my shit." Oh my f*cking god. I'd already pledged for 8 weeks, and I wasn't gonna let this end all of it. So I pulled it up to my blindfolded face, and took a bite. It was a banana.

18. From ARHVYM:

Pulled off the street, blindfolded, stripped down to underwear, driven two hours out of the city and left handcuffed to another person. We had been left a camera, a metcard with $20 on it and a list of tasks that had to be accomplished before we were allowed to get back to uni.

Ended up composing a song and dance number, busking in this tiny coastal town until we got enough money to buy clothes from the Salvation Army. Ended up dating the guy I was cuffed to. Made for a pretty good "how we met" story.

Edit: I'm female and this was part of a week long scavenger hunt/drinking contest/nudity festival type thing.

19. From Drasia:

Guys who play for my uni's rugby team had a pretty hideous initiation. They had to tape a baby-sized diaper to themselves and walk about a half a mile with no clothes or shoes on. When they arrived at the next point they were given a bin in which all bodily fluids had to be put. Each individual had to drink a "dirty pint" and neck a bottle of red wine. By this point, the bins are getting pretty full of piss, vomit etc.

Finally, they were given 3 pints of milk, orange juice and sprite, all of which they had to down. After downing them they had to sprint as hard as they could to a nearby field. Once at the field (and emptied of any bodily fluids once again, due to the curdling of the milk) they were told to lay down and then proceeded to have the bins thrown all over them.

20. From LuluBadonkadonk:

For my sorority, we broke into frat houses at night and stole their composites. Keep in mind, these composites were very heavy and worth thousands of dollars. We stole about 18 composites, then told the frats they had to do something nice for us to get them back. There's nothing like felony burglary charge to ruin your future. Good times.

If guys broke into sororities, they would be arrested.

21. From Horsemon:

I work at an Equine Hospital, a Horsepital if you will. It is tradition for the new guy to stomp down the muck trucks (dump trucks full straw, hay, shit and piss) in their underwear. This is usually done in the morning so for the rest of the day new guy smells like hell while appearing clean and meeting all the vets and his coworkers.


24 people share annoying things that happen everyday but still drive them crazy.

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It's important to try and see the positive side to every situation, but every once in awhile we all just need to complain and whine...

A solid vent session can be healthy and productive every now and then to avoid letting your frustrations turn into something much, much bigger than it is. Did you really start screaming because of the dirty dishes, or is it something else?

Especially now, when everything is pretty tense in the world, it's ok to yell at the ottoman for the fact that you stubbed your toe. How do you stub your toe in the same place every day? It's clearly the ottoman's fault, it's ok...

When a recent Reddit user asked, "What is the most annoying thing that happens to you each day that no matter how long you have endured it, it still bothers you?" people everywhere were ready to share their daily pet peeves. Go ahead, let it out!

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Hearing my roommate eat. Dude sounds like a t-rex - maugisaiyajin

2.

Feeling tired when I wake up. - Shrikeangel

3.

Having a ton of options and none of them sound good. - aHobbyist

4.

That there’s ALWAYS house work to be done. You can’t get ahead, it’s constant. - GravyxNips

5.

That thing where you're listening to something in your headphones while cooking and the cord catches on a cabinet handle and they get ripped out of your ears and for some reason it feels like the most aggressive assault on the senses possible and you're instantly ready to square up with that cabinet - just_moss

6.

Unnecessarily loud people, and other forms of pissing others off emissions like chewing their food loudly or dragging their feet walking - sun_of_darkness

7.

People not letting other people off the train before entering it themselves.

People standing still on the "walking side" of the escalator.

Yeah, I'm a commuter. - Marwinz

8.

I’m a cashier. Have been for 10 years. I somehow still manage to smile and chuckle when things don’t scan and the customer tells me it should be free.

I hear it multiple times a day. It’s not funny. - Michello454

9.

People that hit reply all to work emails that there is clearly no reason.... - Macarthur22000

10.

People who can’t merge into traffic - Varvatos_Vex

11.

When I make a typo, go back and erase, then continue typing and make the error again. By the third time I have to erase the typo I'll be slamming the backspace in frustration. - LoneCypress94

12.

My cat refuses to pee in the litter box and will instead pee on the wall next to the litter box. It's so bad that I've taken him to the vet for it just for them to tell me he's healthy and that he's just an asshole. (Yes the litter boxes are cleaned regularly and I have literally tried everything to solve this) - Drazwaz

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I have these two particular teeth that are just far apart enough that they get food stuck in between them every single time I eat anything. - bojeanerrs

14.

My wife squeezes from the middle of the toothpaste tube. -dbeey270

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Getting up in the middle of the night to pee. Sometimes more than once. I'm only 29 lol this has been going on since I can remember.

It's a real treat when it doesn't happen. -Sybellie

16.

My wife leaves her tea cup next to the sink with just a little bit of tea in every day. Just enough tea that if you put the cup directly in the washer it would make a mess. - foxp3

17.

When the corner of my fitted sheet pops off the mattress. Makes me insane and happens 4-5 times a night. -aheadinabox

18.

Remembering embarrassing memories. - Wrong_Tshirt

19.

People who don't indicate while turning or changing lanes. Still makes me experience involuntary twitches - Jax_Wivy

20.

Sociatal preference to right handed people. Makes finding left-handed tools like scissors and can openers much more tedious and expensive. - Talc_Power

21.

My cat following me into the bathroom every morning to cry at me and then use the litter box. All I want is a moment to myself, but noooooo....I gotta pee with my cat 🙄 - HotFudgeCookie

22.

the toothbrush gag. every single day. you would think after all these years, i could keep myself from the brink of an accidental choking death. alas... - roundhashbrowntown

23.

I’m working remotely because of the whole Covid19 thing. The only place I have to work is the dining room table. The only place I have to put the cat’s litter box is also in the dining room.

Every morning when I sit down to start working, my cat takes a big, smelly sh*t in the box. I swear she waits for me to sit down with my coffee before she goes.

Every. Morning. For the past two weeks. - ArrivesWithABeverage

24.

I work on an ambulance, and my partner for the last year never fails to inform me that the red light has turned green within milliseconds of it changing. I want to force feed him a beach towel every time. Otherwise, great guy. - Jebronyke

24 Memes That Will Only Be Funny If You're Homeschooling Your Kids Right Now.

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"Once you sign on to be a mother, 24/7 is the only shift they offer.”

― Jodi Picoult

If you are homeschooling your kids right now, these memes will be crazy relatable. After this, I think we can all agree teachers need to be paid about a billion dollars a year. Hold onto your sanity as much as possible by laughing at these hilarious parenting memes.

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21 Memes Men Probably Won't Find Funny.

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"Being a woman is hard work."

-Maya Angelou

Being a woman ain't easy, but laughing at memes is. This list may not be that funny to dudes, but the ladies will definitely be able to relate to the comedy in these hysterical memes.

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Woman threatens not to give pregnant sister a shower gift if she chooses a 'horrible' baby name.

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This "Am I The A**hole?" story involves a woman who named her daughter Isis, and she's surprisingly not the one asking the question.

Artist shesheshe0 is a cool aunt, making woodburned plaques for all her nieces and nephews featuring their names and birthdays. It's become a family tradition that she threatened to break if her sister named her kid something awful, and her sister does have terrible taste. The sister named her firstborn Isis, and at five years old, the niece is younger than the notorious terrorist group.

The concerned aunt wrote:

I (33F) am currently hosting my pregnant sister (29F) and niece at my house. My sister is almost 8 months along, and her husband works in a healthcare field, so we decided it would be safer for her to stay with me for the time being.

My sister is known for having a questionable taste in names. She named my five year old niece Isis, and she was planning to give the new baby and equally bad name. I won’t put it here for privacy reasons, but think along the lines of “Divine Nova” or “Quartz.” Just ridiculous.

For the sake of Baby Marijuana, Topaz, or whatever the kid's name will be, the Original Poster felt the need to intervene:

We were chilling last night after the kids went to bed, and that’s when she told me the name. I reminded her how hurt she always is when people comment on Isis’ name, and how even my niece has picked up on it (she goes by another name at kindergarten). I talked to her about how kids with bad names can suffer in the labor market. She still wasn’t budging, so I told her I wouldn’t make a name plaque for baby if she chose that name. For my nieces and nephews, I usually wood burn a nice plaque with the name and DOB, and it becomes a treasure as they get older. I love doing it, and I think my sister was shocked. She said if I felt that strongly about the name, she’d rethink it.

AITA? I feel a bit bad for holding a gift over her head, but I just want to protect my niece-to-be from having to answer to a horrible name. My husband (who wasn’t there) thinks I went to far and is siding with my sister.

This lead to an interesting discussion, because the issue of whether it's a sister's place to intervene with such a personal decision is truly a matter of opinion.

NachosPeligroso believes that the outcome of a baby being named Amethyst or Terrorist should be avoided at all costs.

"NTA (Not The A**hole). Giving your kid a "unique" name is just straight horrible. You don't have to support it by making a gift honoring it," they wrote.

MadMunky5B5 went with "Everybody Sucks Here."

"It's kinda sh*tty of you to withhold what could be a family heirloom because you disagree with the name she gave the kid," they commented. "But she also sucks for putting that on her kid, growing up with a strange/non-sense name sucks for the kid because kids suck and will make fun of whatever is the easiest target."

Ten_before_six, on the other hand, told the OP to back off: "YTA (You're The A**hole). mind your damn business and don't emotionally blackmail people."

At the end of the day, whatever the name is, it can't be as bad as Isis.

21 of the funniest DIY solutions people have used to protect themselves from coronavirus.

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The global coronavirus pandemic has brought out the best and the worst in humanity. The worst: we hord toilet paper, berate grocery store workers, and refuse to give up spring break. The best: we stay home to save grandma and grandpa, clap for doctors and nurses, and tap in to bottomless wells of creativity and imagination we never even knew existed. And what better use of this newfound creativity than coming up with DIY solutions to help stop the spread of COVID-19?!

Here are 18 photos of people who thought outside-the-box in their attempts to protect themselves (and others) from coronavirus:

(For the record, we do not endorse any of these DIY "solutions" and recommends the CDC-approved methods of hand-washing, face masks, and social distancing to stop the spread of the virus—but major props to these folks for their creativity!) STAY SAFE OUT THERE.

1.) Who needs facemasks, or hand sanitizer when you can have beskar armour to protect against Corona?

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2.) A trip to Walmart for just the essentials.

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3.) Corona Protection

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4.) Not getting the Coronavirus... spotted in the Atlanta airport

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6.) How does that dog do his business?

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7.) This woman who came into our restaurant said this is the only protective mask she could find.

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8.) Mask shortage improvisation

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9.) Remember, it has to be with wings.

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10.) You always gotta be careful when going to supermarkets especially with CoVID right now

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11.) Coronavirus protection?

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13.) May the virus not be with you.

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14.) COVID drip.

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15.) Now I can't touch my face.

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16.) Corona Virus becomes Human

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17.) This guy didn't have a mask, so he came to the orthopedist as a polar bear

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18.) No masks no problem!

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20.) Typical Day at Walmart in Breaux Bridge, La

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21.) COVID gives you wings!

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23 women share the things men think are attractive that are actually a turnoff.

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Finding love is hard, we all know that — but a lot of people don't make it any easier for themselves.

A recent Reddit thread asked women to name the things guys do in an attempt to seem attractive, but which fail miserably. From bragging about their salary to trying too hard to seem tough, the answers are cringey. Still, a lot of guys might need to hear them.

1. Gender norms? In this economy??

Dated a guy once that took the masculine thing too far. I couldn't call him cute without him flipping out. He wouldn't ever call anything cute either. Wouldn't even run his hands through my hair because it was too girly. - lucky_719

2. Fellas, it's okay for your bedroom voice to be the same as your rest-of-the-house voice.

I had an ex that would put on his "sultry" voice and tell me it's time for bed.

It really came out sounding creepy and not a bit romantic.

Physically, we had good times but I had to cringe past his verbal intro. - Agreeable-Landscape

3. Pssst, no one believes you.

Explaining that they're great at sex. - keepusguessing

4. Please don't tell us fanfic about the people you would beat up if you could.

Oh god I HATE when men tell hypothetical stories about the type of guys who would get their a**es kicked if they dared to disrespect them. It’s not making you look like a hero, just a violent jacka**. - QueenBumbleBrii

5. Just stick to your normal face in pictures.

The Tinder squint which they think makes them look like a moody lead singer on an album cover, when it actually makes them look like Renee Zellweger smelled a fart - idiosyncrassy

6. Brag about how cheap it was instead.

Bragging about how expensive their house/car/boat/etc. is or how much money they make. It’s great to share your passions and talk about your job but if all you’re interested in is material items and money I’m immediately turned off. - sleeeeeepypanda

7. Bragging about social media makes no one look good.

i H A T E when guys brag about having some clout on social media, i do not care how many followers you have i care about you as a person!! - 5K1DMARK

8. Don't mansplain on a date. Or ever.

Trying to prove that they are smarter than me. Dude i want to be able to have a normal conversation with you. Stop interrupting me and actually listen for a second. You might recognize that I too have something interesting to contribute to the conversation. - just_rebekka

9. It's nicer to be nice.

Trying to show how “alpha” they are by treating other people like shit. No, Trent, being a dick isn’t sexy and you look pathetic. - DangerousRiver9

10. Show people you're fun, don't tell them.

Bragging about how many women they’ve slept with because they are good in bed. And their crazy times with the boys (partying, drinking, etc). - lilycrow47

11. The whole vehicular death wish thing is not hot.

Drive really fast and recklessly. I would like get home in one piece - Regallybeagley

12. Guys brag about having bad hygiene?!

Bragging about things that they shouldn't brag about to make themselves seem more "manly". i.e., not caring about their hygiene or skincare, not knowing how to look after a child, not knowing how to cook, not wanting to clean up after themselves or clean a house, not wanting to read books to better themselves or trying new things, etc etc.

Even worse when they shame other men for it. - milkcustard

13. Ordering for someone and then making them pay is a real weird flex.

Order my food for me. Not in a cute, I know what she wants kind of way but a dominant a**hole kind of way.

I once was taken on a date, he insisted in driving and drove like a jackass there and back, blasted the same T-pain song over and over, then as we proceeded to order, he ordered everything for me, from the water to my horrible salad. I STILL PAID HALF THE BILL!!!!! One of the worst dates ever. 0 out of 10 would reccomended dating this guy. - ChayoteSoup

14. Why do men think this is attractive?

On dating websites, post photos of them posing with at least 8 scantily clad women who work at the tropical resort that the guy is staying at. - mermaidpaint

15. Persistence is not key.

Crazy, but to this day a lot of guys think being excessively persistent is the way to get a girl. As soon as I’ve said no, or told you I have a boyfriend, it should be the end of it. If I was interested, I wouldn’t have rejected you in the first place. - kay37892

16. Think you're "too broken to love"? Okay, bye!

The whole soft boi demeanour. Wow you read, listen to Arctic Monkeys and the smiths, drink your coffee black, know the basics of acoustic guitar or bass, smoke cigarettes and weed, drink whiskey, write poetry and are too broken and detached to ever truly love anybody after that one time you got your heart broken when you were 17? Amazing. Now get out of my dms talking about that ‘glimmer in my eye and smirk in my smile that made you know there was something about me’, or even how we can be ‘wrecks’ together, or play the big talk about being too ‘broken to love’ but claim to have fallen in love with me after like two weeks of sparse conversations where you spout fake deep bullshit. The Instagram account beammeupsoftboi is a great example of this oddly popular niche group of guys. - capricious_achelois

17. Bragging about how hot your last girlfriend was? No.

Bragging in general. I've had men tell me, on first dates, about their salary, their cars, how hot their last gf was, their stock investments, how much money they made on Bitcoin, how early they got into Tesla, their employee number at [major tech company], how much cash they have on hand, etc. Such a turnoff.

Can someone explain to me why exactly they do it? Insecurity? The belief that men are supposed to provide resources so they are helpfully showing me theirs? The inability to comprehend that I'm a person, who wants to *like* you as opposed to be dazzled by you? - laney_luck

18. Telling a woman how much you can't stand women... now there's a strategy!

Compare me to other girls in a way that's supposed to make me feel special, but is actually just demeaning to every other woman on the planet. Things like "most women only want Chads who will treat them like s***, I'm happy you're not like that" or "other females are plastic bimbo b****** who are only out for money, I'm happy you're not a gold digger." Say that enough and I start hearing "I hate women, but I'm nice to you because I think you're f***able." - ArcadiaPlanitia

19. Being rude to waitstaff is a huge red flag.

If you have to constantly tell people how big of a deal you are, you're not a big deal. Also dont be a jerk to the staff. - pandsRrad

20. Fun fact, you don't have to insult one person to compliment another.

Mocking or acting repulsed By overweight or older women to show they feel you aren’t either.

It’s a d*** move.

Compliment women you are attracted to modestly, no need to disparage women you aren’t. - Happy_face_caller

21. Do the men who do this think we're going to chase after them and ask to make out?

Definitely cupping your waist when they're just trying to get by. If there's enough room go around and if not then say excuse me and I'll move. But don't put your hand on me and direct me where to go, it's not sexy and I don't need anyone touching me that isn't my S.O. - HiddenVixen95

22. Imagine if women were this proud of handling a bra clasp.

Every man I've ever dated has done this: take my bra off without looking at the clasps, one handed with a flourish like it's a magical feat. Then beam at me with smug pride. It's my bra, I...I know how to take it off, I do it at least twice a day... - kenjosaurous

23. The whole "your face here" Tinder photo thing has go to stop.

I swipe left on every guy who just has photos with lots of hot girls in his profile. I feel like he's using these women as props to prove that he is desirable, which is shallow and objectifying. No thank you.

Same for guys with shirtless mirror selfies. - ExcellentNothing

12 people who've been homeless share the scariest thing they saw in the streets.

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Plenty of people fall on hard times and end up sleeping in the streets, in their car, or on other people's couches.

And unfortunately, being without a home can leave you in a pretty vulnerable position. A recent Reddit thread asked people who've slept rough to share the scariest things they saw.

1. One person saw an explosion in the night.

There is a drainage ditch in my area that the local homeless people tend to bed down in. A few years ago, when I found myself destitute, I spent one night down there. That night I witnessed a molotov get thrown into another dude's spot which led to a huge fire that ran rampant through the area.

Yeah, I bought a tent the next day and started camping in the local mountains. - JustAFrontDeskJockey

2. This woman left an abusive situation and found herself in more danger — but explained her way out.

Waking up to a shotgun being pointed directly at my head.

I wasn't truly homeless but had no money or bank card and was trying to get back to my parents following nearly bering strangled to death by my ex.

The actual fight happened whilst we were out so I had no spare no clothes, I'd left my wallet at his and only had a dieing phone on me.

I tried getting money for a train but only really managed enough for a bus fare to the next town and decided to try hitchhiking.

She found a barn, but then:

Late into the night I gave up and managed to sneak into a barn where I was able to get comfortable enough to sleep. Turns out I didn't close the door enough and the farmer found me in the morning after taking his gun to investigate.

He woke me up (I think he coughed loudly) with the gun painted at me and I nearly shat myself. It asked me what I thought I was doing in his barn and quizzed me on how I got in. He asked to see my arms before he lowered the gun and he started chatting.

He was quite nice though and after talking to him for awhile he took me back to his house and fed me and let me have a shower. - Gingerpenguin

3. Kidnapping attempts and TikToking teens...

Biggest thing (5'3 115lb) was how often people try to abduct you. That and how often people try to serve you tampered food. The teenagers trying to get clout by assaulting/"pranking" you is another one. - NegatorisWrecks

4. Peeping toms strike everyone, especially the most vulnerable.

I’m a woman in my early twenties. Not my brightest decision, but I slept in my car for several weeks, when I was completely out of money. Every night I parked in a small cul-de-sac; as far as I knew, the area was office-only, so I didn’t take anybody’s parking lot and in the morning I left. I worked a lot, so usually I slept like a log.

One night though I woke up, feeling anxious for some reason. I looked up and saw a softly illuminated window right above me. Nice, warm light as if from a grandma bedside lamp. I freaked out a bit and fumbled for my keys — I better sit the rest of the night out at McDonalds or something. Then I noticed a silhouette not far away. A man was standing still and watching me. He didn’t knock on my window glass, didn’t try to talk or anything. He was just watching.

I booked it out of that cul-de-sac real quick. You know, the thing that freaks me out the most is not even the fact that he could assault or rob me then, but the realization that he may have watched me every other night, but I was too tired to notice that earlier. - kopitapa

5. Guess they weren't so chill.

I had been homeless for a couple weeks now and had made friends with this couple, they seemed pretty chill but had a bit of a drinking problem.

Anyway one night i was sleeping, could here some commotion going on, couldn't make out who it was or what was going on, until my buddy comes and sits on my sleeping bag, blood pumping out of his neck, like full on everytime his heart beat it would splurt out, not under huge pressure but it was pretty bad. I ask him what happened and he said he think his misses had cut his throat with a stanley blade, he was so drunk he was not aware of how bad his injury was, and insisted i did not call an ambulance.

So i called the police they called the ambulance. I see the dude a couple days later, still homeless, scar on his neck. He's ever so grateful the nurse had told him how lucky he was, he was literally a couple millimeters away from dying that night. - mcal9909

6. Raccoons?! No thank you.

One morning, early, I was sleeping in an abandoned warehouse up a set of stairs nearly in the rafters and was woken by 4 raccoons like 4 feet from me eating my bag. Having to shit in the middle of the night is also awful.

Being homeless is only scary for a couple of days. There's depression and boredom that are your real enemies. Your body and mind go into a sort of hyper survival mode and there is no room for fear. - wospgame

7. Okay, a mountain lion? Even worse.

I was working in a mountain town and couldn’t afford rent, even with 2 jobs. One night I was wasted after work, Me and a work friend were always there by ourselves closing so the bar was free game. Left work at 2am walked the hour and a half back to my tent outside of town. While being stalked by a mountain lion, I assume I looked injured and could be an easy meal. It was terrifying. I had a digital camera with me so I just kept pointing it in the area of the ridge where I could hear it walking and flashed repeatedly. Made it home safe. - simplysmgma

8. Okay, a bear tops it.

Another night after closing, different campsite I must’ve smelled like a huge gyro after working a double at Pitas In Paradise. Got into my sleeping bag in my tent. I was just about to doze off when I heard big crunches of a black bear sniffing me out. I was frozen with terror. The bear put his about against the nylon inches above my head. Hot steam on my face. I had pulled the sleeping bag up to my cheeks petrified when I slapped the bears nose above my forehead. It was an involuntary reaction and I felt stupid but I spooked the bear and it took off. I got an apartment with some friends soon after. - simplysmgma

9. That is too many cats.

I had found a seemingly nice quiet cut in the woods, shade, private, I'm set. I wake up to a most guttural yowl at 2 a.m. A pack of feral cats that the adjacent 50 year old Rainman had lured to his property with cans of wet food. They stood on the fence yowling, eyes reflecting as we started the other down. - sphinctersayhuh

10. Sometimes a glimpse of your future is the scariest thing of all.

so i lived in my car but i remember seeing this woman and talking to her outside a store when i was just chilling eating some food and she told me she had been homeless literally her entire life and had never sleep on a proper bed in her life, i asked how old she was, she told me she was 53. it was scary to me because i realised that that could have easily been me. i think about that woman every single day. - thr0waway56572343

11. Besides the cops.

17 years old, dead asleep in the back of a car belonging to my then-girlfriend’s parents in a parking garage. It’s freezing outside - February in Canada, 3AM. I’m awoken by cops dragging me from the car, ragdolling my sleepy-self, (I’m 6’2, 210), yelling about the weapon. They just won’t shut up about a weapon - I’ve no idea to what they’re referring. I try to explain that I’ve got permission to be in the car, gave them the number for the parents, worried about waking them up. The weapon! The weapon! I asked them to show me what weapon they found, thinking maybe a parent hid a bat under the seat for protection. They pulled on the handle of a window scraper with squeegee that was covered by a black garbage bag full of clothes intended for the Goodwill. I asked them how it was they felt threatened by a squeegee when I was F***ING ASLEEP. I was urged to shut the f***ing up, then driven to an all-night laundromat, and told to sleep across the super-comfortable plastic chairs. F***ing cops. - baldchow

12. And cold temperatures are no joke.

Cold weather. I thought I was going to die one night I was so cold. I remember waking up thinking "you need to move or you are going to die". - whatPortsDoUHaveOpen


24 Memes To Help You Start Your Morning Off With A Laugh.

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"No matter what your heartache may be, laughing helps you forget it for a few seconds."

-Red Skelton

Even when life seems impossibly hard, there's always something you can laugh at. Take these memes for example. They are just the pick-me-up you need to get this day started off on the right foot. This ultra silly list of memes will have you giggling even if you're not a morning person.

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22 people share the behaviors that are instant turn-offs in a relationship.

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One of the hardest parts of having a healthy relationship is finding someone first...

Sure, everyone always tells you that there are "lots of fish in the sea," but are there really? Because some of these fish are really not ideal. A lot of the fish are already with someone, riding a skateboard to work, serial cheaters, liars, obsessed with their own selfies...there's a lot to weed through...

Even with dating apps, which do a lot of the work for you as far as finding people who are your type with shared interests in your area, there's still a lot of heavy lifting involved on your end. But, at least we all have some funny stories of horrible first dates...

So, when a recent Reddit user asked, "What is an instant turn-off in a relationship?" people were definitely ready to share the red flags that make them instantly turn right back around in the single world.

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Refusal to admit they have done anything wrong. Never apologizing. Constantly positioning as the victim. Deluding themselves by twisting reality so they never have to honestly look at themselves. - OhBlaDii

2.

Putting the other person down when they're interested in/excited about something. - rithult

3.

A big red flag in either a romantic relationship or just a friendship for me, is when the person you’re talking to is always either the hero or the victim in every story they tell.

Usually a pretty good indicator or how they view themselves / interact with the world, and it usually means they’re going to be “my way or the highway” or “everyone else is to blame for everything”

Both are insufferable qualities - InsolentFoolBoy

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Not letting the other speak, or generally not showing an interest in what the other person has to say. - Mrsjtkirk

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Not sure what it's called, but intentionally causing a fight because they enjoy the making up period. -BorderlineGrant

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When you realize there would be no plans, unless you are the one to initiate them - babymoat

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My ex always told me to not meet up with some of friends anymore. That's always a red flag. I didn't stop meeting my friends but I stopped meeting her pretty soon. - Baapu_

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Narcissism - DrunkSpiderMan

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Low self-esteem to the point you have to dance around their feelings constantly out of fear they'll blow up over the most miniscule things. - TheVillageLooney

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Always wanting you to be there for them but not returning the favor - Straciabuttbluff

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Not having the same sense of humor. How horrible to be laughing and the other person doesn’t think somethings funny. From like a core humor standpoint. Hard to explain but I’ve been in this situation during a date and it’s soooo awkward to realize you don’t find the same things funny. - sambamthankyamaam

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Well, I once dated a girl that threw her trash out her car window, and I ended up dumping her the next day... not because of that, but it was a pretty clear sign that we weren't on the same page. - PhoboIsDead

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Too much talking and no listening. - Knute5

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Being condescending about your partner's passions/ hobbies/ interests - pluto_has_plans

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Chewing so damn loud as if they’ve never had food before -Verazz

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Being rude to customer service people. If you can’t empathize with how hard they have to work, I can’t imagine they’ll be pleasant when we are having some issues. - partyinthemind

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Littering or being rude to service staff. I will straight up end that relationship right then and there. -Meosuke

18.

Constantly talking about sex and nothing else like you're some teenager high on hormones. - TenaciousP92

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Basing my actions or personality on astrology. -Happy8Day

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Having no ambition. - oneluckytrooper

21.

Being mean and full of yourself

The idea that one person is the prize and the other person is lucky to have the other one. - GreatMight

22.

Stereotyping/sexism/racism. Like as soon as something totally ignorant and prejudiced comes out of someone's mouth, no matter how sexy that person was, is totally rendered unsalvageably a "no" for me. -feministicesculptor

18 teachers having fun with their classes over Zoom.

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We thought we were addicted to the internet before, and then the coronavirus pandemic hit.

Everything from relationships to work to school have gone from IRL to video chat, and these teachers are making the most of their new jobs as professors at Zoom University.

1. Pinocchio's not a doll, he's a real boy!

2. Sign of the times.

3. Mahalo!

4. Siri, play "The Imperial March."

5. A good tip from Ms. Roberts.

6. What's new, pussycat?

7. Teachers got memes, too.

8. Live by the sword.

9. Special guest star.

10. You've been warned by the avocado.

11. Hi hi Birdie.

12. Now that's how you keep the class's attention.

13. This fanfare got the teacher fans.

14. Theater teachers know drama.

15. "Girl, come over and do my hair!"

16. Cheers!

17. The closest thing we'll get to having class outside.

18. This teacher is a real Renegade.

30 funny tweets from this year that got over 100,000 likes.

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We're only four months into 2020, but it has been a wild ride so far...

March somehow lasted approximately one million years in only 31 days and we're in the middle of a global health crisis. Whether you're temporarily out of work, working from home, or an essential worker saving lives or keeping society functioning, you could probably use a solid laugh.

Being stuck at home (even though it's what we must do!) is starting to get a little weird. There are only so many FaceTime happy hour parties you can attend before you start to wonder if your former existence was a lie and now you're stuck in an alternate timeline. However, fear not! People have definitely not lost their sense of humor regardless of how stressful this quarantine is about to get.

We've barely made a dent in 2020, but here are some of the funniest tweets that have gone viral so far...

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Woman asks if she's wrong for cutting ties with brother who hid pain meds as April Fool's Day prank.

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In theory, April Fool's jokes should be playful and funny for all involved. After the initial shock of the prank wears off, the person being pranked should be able to laugh and see the intentions were ultimately in good will.

However, a lot of people think they can be cleansed of their sins by labeling any manipulation or trick as a "prank" and that's simply now how it works.

In a recent post on the Am I The A*shole subreddit, a woman shared how her brother "pranked" her on April Fool's day by hiding her pain meds, and now she refuses to speak with him.

AITA for refusing to talk to my brother after his April fool’s day “joke” of hiding my pain medication?

OP kept the post honest by admitting that she doesn't have the best relationship with her older brother, and generally finds him annoying and invasive.

I (20F) live with my parents and older brother. I’ll be honest - I do not like him. We do not get along. He’s annoying and intruding and loud and I could go on. I try to just ignore him.

On April Fool's Day, OP's brother thought it would be a funny "prank" to hide the pain meds she uses to treat period pain.

For April fools day yesterday, as a “joke,” he decided to hide the pain medication I take to deal with my periods. I have horrible periods, especially the first couple days (which yesterday was) and the pain can be debilitating and make me cry if I don’t have the pain meds to help (even then, I still have pain, I’m just able to function).

OP spent all of April Fool's trying to find her meds to no avail, and then the next morning her brother returned them and revealed it was all a prank.

I basically couldn’t find them all day yesterday then this morning he gave them to me and said “April Fools!!” His prank was hiding this on me since I “relied on them so heavily and need to see I don’t need pain meds to get through the day.” He said that’s what I get for keeping the meds in the kitchen (which I do because they need to be taken with food and/or water).

OP was deeply angry with her brother and is currently giving him the silent treatment despite his protests.

I was f*cking pissed. He saw me crying and wincing in pain and hid them from me? I told him to f*ck off and that this would be the last conversation we’d have for a while. I’m ignoring him but he keeps texting me like “come on really?” And giving ME dirty looks in the hallway like I’m the one who did something wrong.

Her parents have decided to stay out of the rift and respect OP's need for space, but her brother is persistent about the fact that hiding the meds was meant as a joke.

My parents are staying out of it as we’re both adults. They say f how I want to deal with is by ignoring him then it is what it is.

AITA? I don’t think this was a joke. I think this is over the line.

ineffable_sweetness definitely agrees with OP about her brother crossing a line.

NTA. I'm not sure why he thought watching someone be in pain all day would be funny, but it's not. He crossed a line.

gunnyhunty thinks that OP's parents are jerks for not fully siding with her and calling out the brother's unconscionable behavior.

NTA. It wasn’t a joke, and it was over the line. Your parents suck for acting like what he did was fine and needed to be worked out between you. He wants to act like a child, he should be treated like one. I loathe people like him who think he has the answer to everything and feels that he has the right to take action against someone’s will. I wouldn’t talk to him either, possibly ever again personally. If he offered a genuine and heartfelt apology I might consider it.

I suggest finding someplace, preferably locked, that you can hide your medication since your AH brother wants to play thief and doctor.

alakaiex thinks OP should cut off her brother and potentially seek medical treatment.

NTA. He’s horrible and an idiot who clearly doesn’t know what a cramp is. You might want to talk to a doctor about PCOS or endometriosis.

Leas_Alpenglow thinks OP's brother partially felt it was a "joke" because it was period pain, and not another less gendered kind of pain.

NTA.

If someone were to come between my arthritis flare up and my pain medication... for kicks!?! That motherf*cker would get a throat punch, or get a one way ticket out of my life.

Seems extreme, but my pain is also extreme and I'm not spending a minute trapped in this meat suit while someone else withholds medication for a laugh? Nah dude, nah.

I also have extremely painful cycles, and pain management is essential for chris'sakes.

wind-river7 thinks OP should use this as leverage to give her brother a taste of his own medicine in the future, so he learns.

NTA. Brother saw you in pain all day and still kept your medication hidden. Remember that the next time he asks you for a favor, because at some point in the future he will. It is not a joke when no one laughs.

While it's clear that OP did nothing wrong, the biggest question at hand is whether she should even consider letting her brother back into her life, and what role her parents should (or shouldn't) play in this. While this may have been a "joke" to him, knowingly watching a family member in pain and thinking it's funny is a sign of deeper psychological issues.

14 people share the small moments that changed the course of their lives.

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The moments that change your life can be as small as a chat by a friend's locker or as big as a car accident.

People shared the quick interactions that ending up changing the rest of their lives, and the Butterfly Effect is real.

1. crocrococ went back to school because they got hit by a car.

When I was 17 I left school with no degree, no money and no idea what to do with my life. My dad managed to get me job in retail and on my way to work (first day) I got hit by a car.

The manager didn't give a f*ck and gave my position to someone else. With literally nothing left to do I decided to go back to school. That was about 7 years ago. I finished school with honors, went to university, got my bachelors degree in electrical engineering (something everyone I knew and talked to told me was impossible for a f*ck up like me) and now I work as an engineer making more money in my first year of work than I ever did in my entire life.

Sometimes I think about tracking the guy down who hit me with his car to thank him.

2. Life begins at Marc's locker, Henchman4Hire.

One day before homeroom in my junior year of high school, I went to hang out at my friend Marc's locker, like we all usually did every morning. I came upon our other friend Dave trying to convince Marc to join a club called Junior Achievement at their first meeting later that night. It's a 'young business leaders' sort of extracurricular club. When I asked what they're talking about, Dave suggested I should give it a try as well.

Later that night, my parents were late getting home from my some event, so I figured it was too late for them to give me a ride to this Junior Achievement thing — but when my dad walked in the door and I reminded him, he hurried me out to the car and I go. Was in the club both junior and senior year of high school with my friends.

Our regional Junior Achievement club offered an annual full tuition scholarship to a local private university. A top tier school, but one I was not considering. However, Marc, Dave and our other senior year friends already had their college careers planned out, so they convinced me to apply for the scholarship so that at least someone from our club applied.

In the end, apparently only me and some other kid from some other local club in our region applied for the scholarship. And I must have wowed the selection committee, because I won the scholarship and got a nearly free ride into that university.

Which was good news, since I wasn't accepted at any of the other colleges I applied at.

So I owe my entire college career, all the friends I made there and probably my current job to that random morning before homeroom.

3. enderswigginredux still has a life because they didn't stop to tie their shoes.

If I had decided to tie my shoes when I noticed my laces were undone, I would have been run over accidentally by the woman who raised me when she hit the gas instead of the break. Instead I walked to the side of the car before tying my shoes and lived.

4. One trip to the zoo turned MassmasterK into a heathen.

At age 15, I was forced to hang out with a family member on a vacation I didn't want to be on and ended up going to the zoo. I didn't feel like walking around with my cousin, so I hung out by the chimps for a long time. I ended up seeing one of them make a face of what appeared to be laughter and was surprised at how human-like it was. I went home, did some research, and stumbled upon the discipline of anthropology, which turned out to be one of my greatest passions. Soon after, I denounced my old religion, and became a proponent of evolution, causing an enormous rift in my family life and sending me on a path of heathen adventures.

5. Firefighters were at the right grocery store for Medicnotadriver.

Back in 1988 I went to the grocery store with my mom. Local volunteer fire department was doing a demonstration in the parking lot so my mom let me stay and watch, even after she went home. I was given instructions to call home on the pay phone in the grocery store when the demo was done. 30 years later I'm a firefighter/Paramedic and have been involved in emergency services since I was 12.

6. The right person heard Back2Bach practice piano.

When I was a kid, the pastor of my parents' church heard me practicing Bach on the piano.

He asked if I'd like to try the pipe organ - something that had always fascinated me. I took to it like a duck to water, even though my feet could barely reach the pedals.

So right then and there - knowing my parents couldn't afford it - he offered to pay for my complete music education in preparation for college (including organ, piano, theory, keyboard harmony and ear training).

His act of generosity and kindness brought about my career. And all he asked in return was for me to substitute for the church organist when he was on vacation or away - something I was honored to do.

7. Every friendship begins with a single "hi," chedeng.

I was a lonely kid in my first year in university having just had a falling out with the first group of friends I made there. It was the 2nd semester and in my first class I decided to sit with a few people I knew from a previous class I had and decided to say hi. What ensued were long lasting friendships that still persists today. I consider them as a family I never had.

8. The right person took a Minecraft break with randomusername59.

First week of freshman year I walked up and down my dorm hall asking people if they want to make tea with me in the kitchen. It was an engineering co-ed dorm so I wanted to be inclusive. as I was asking people a guy playing Minecraft randomly said yes. He wasn’t even paying attention but three years later he’s my best friend, my boyfriend, and has given me the greatest love ever. It all started because I wanted tea and didn’t want to drink alone.

9. QuasarDelta flipped to the right channel.

I was really bored and figured I would watch some tv while I did some sketches. Nothing really seemed interesting but then this weird show called "Mythbusters" came on. I went from a high school art student to computer engineer just from background noise.

10. The right person called andiberri's "patient."

Random college love match here too! This girl was on campus to preview the school and wanted me to show her around. She followed me all day like a lost puppy until finally it was time to crash. She was assigned to sleep in another dorm, but coincidentally the girls assigned to sleep in mine wanted to sleep where she was assigned so they decided to switch.

As she’s getting ready for bed she suddenly has to puke, and while she’s barfing up bad cheese in my bathroom her phone rings. I’m normally not the type to answer a relative stranger’s phone, but her ringtone was obnoxious and I figured I could just let whoever it was know that she would call them right back.

Well, it was a friend of hers from high school and he and I just kept chatting and really hit it off. That conversation started around 9:30 at night and didn’t end until 8 the next morning when we realized the sun was up and we had been talking all night! Now we’ve been together 14 years and just had our second child together. ☺️

11. WestBrink is lucky his friend wore the wrong shoes.

Freshman year of college, I decided to hike the John Muir trail with my dad and a buddy of mine. We spent months getting ready, shaking out our gear, getting in shape, etc. So, when my dad stepped wrong and messed his knee up and had to bail, I was really disappointed, but was going to finish without him.

Until my buddies shoes began to fall apart, after only like 40 miles, and he decided to bail too. Well, I didn't want to do the next 150 miles alone, so I begrudgingly left the trail with them.

When I got home, there was an email from the professor of a drafting class I'd taken asking for people to work as TAs and graders for a machining class he was about to start teaching, and to respond by that Friday. I respond, and he's delighted to have me.

Worked as a TA and his only grader for two years until he retired. Before he retired, he wrote me a glowing letter of recommendation, which I attached to applications when applying to internships. I got an interview, despite my below target GPA, the interviewer for one particular oil company explained, because of my TA experience and the letter of recommendation. I end up getting an internship at that oil company, and eventually a full time job after graduation. Several years later, the company transfers me to Montana, where I bought a house and met my now-fiancee.

So, if my buddy had bought a little better shoes, I might be in a totally different place in life...

12. A snarky comment gave Diambog an idea.

Fresh out of high school, I went to a military recruitment office. Long story short, turns out I wasn't suited to military service. I was at a loss because I really wanted to travel and do some good while building new skills. One of the recruiters sarcastically remarked, "Why don't you join the Peace Corps?"

So I did. I'm almost finished with my two years.

13. v_is_my_bias found his wife in a virtual mobster game.

Back in 2011 it was all the rage at my school to play these text-based browser games featuring mafia/mobsters. In general that culture was pretty popular back then when it comes to entertainment.

I was playing this game and at some point I got a message that someone had tried to break into my fictional apartment. When people failed doing that it would show part of their name unless they were significantly stronger.

I messaged that person with a cheesy joke about how next time they can just ring the doorbell. The end of last year, 6 years after the fact, we got married and we are now in the (painfully slow) process of my wife moving 11,500 miles away from home to come live with me.

Had she never failed that action in the game or had she never attempted it in the first place we never would have been where we are. Had I never had this shitty sense of humor that urged me to message her, we never would have been where we are.

14. A stranger's encouragement kept -eDgAR- reading.

When I was a kid we didn't have a lot of money, so we often shopped at thrift stores. What I loved about that was that you could get 10 books for a dollar, so I would plant myself in front of the book section and make piles of which one I wanted to get and then decided after I'd gone through them all.

One day an older lady saw me sitting with my piles and asked if I liked to read. I told her I did and showed her a few of the books I found that I liked. She smiled and then pulled a dollar out of her purse, handed it to me and said, "Promise me that you'll keep reading." I was so happy and immediately stood up and said that I would. She smiled and walked away and I went back to my piles able to pick out an extra 10 books to take home.

It was just a small act of kindness for her, but for me having a random stranger encourage my love of reading and making me promise to never stop definitely had a lot to do with my continued love of reading. This was over 20 years ago, but I still think of her whenever I buy a new book.

20 people with dangerous jobs share their scariest days at work.

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Even the happiest employees have days where they day dream of walking away from their job and never looking back, it's just the nature of work.

While every job has its frustrations and emotional liabilities, some jobs place people in physical danger regularly, and the risks can far outweigh the paycheck. Having a job with wild stories sounds fun in theory, but can be unsustainable in the long-term.

In a popular Reddit thread, people who have worked dangerous jobs shared stories of their scariest experiences on the job, and they all deserve raises.

1. From storebrand:

I worked in a shipyard off the Great Lakes on tankers and cargo ships. I'll preface this by saying I loved and miss this job every day. I work in an office now and it's boring.

One time I was working in a bilge tank with another guy named Ryan. We repaired a section of a bulkhead (cut out and replaced a section with new steel). We had the old 4x4 piece of steel tied up, made sure our knot was secure. He went up top to pull it up and I stayed down on the catwalk to help the load clear the ladder. Halfway up the rope snapped and the steel fell about an inch from me onto the catwalk, barely missing my head. I look up at Ryan for confirmation that I almost died. I pick up the piece to tie up and try again, and the catwalk collapses under the combined weight. Just another day though.

My last day there I was helping my dad and a couple other guys move staging. I'm leaning over a hole between decks reaching for a plank (these are 100lb planks of wood, two guys below two guys up top). Just as I get my hand on the plank both guys below heave upwards, crushing my hand between it and the deck. I instantly knew my thumb was broken and walked out immediately never to return. Yeah, my dad broke my thumb.

2. From Karljohnellis:

I worked fixing railway tracks for a while. Digs were horrible, the traveling was horrible. The tools were never in good enough condition. There's a spotters round the corners( if you're ever working near a bend) with a button to cut all our tools off if there's a train coming.

About 9 of us working and we hear the train before seeing it, we just get the tools and our bodies clear as a train comes flying past. Go down the track to see what happened and the spotter is sat with his phone having a Tommy crank! Couldn't keep working with people like that. That was the last straw.

3. From captain_benzo:

I was a trainee on a north sea Drilling rig, a Mud Engineer. We were drilling and hit a pocket of H2S gas ( explosive and highly toxic) we had gas detectors which went off the scale. The 'pit room' ( big tanks of mud with huge pumps to pump mud down the well) was evacuated but the mud pumps were still running. somebody had to go back in, open the emergency air ventilation and shut down the pumps.

I drew the short straw and put the respirator on (very old and possibly f*cked) and wandered in.

That was the longest 2 minutes of my life.

I don't work offshore anymore.

4. From picksandchooses:

I spent 2 weeks being lowered into the ballast tanks of Great Lakes ore carriers in Milwaukee in December. The tanks are about the size of a railroad box car and they all have about 3' of mud in them. I had the vacuum cleaner from hell and sucked up all the mud while trying not to freeze to death. When that job was done I was put in a full protection suit and SCBA and crawled into the exhaust system of the ship's main engine with a solvent gun and I scraped diesel exhaust soot out of the 3' diameter exhaust pipes.

I wanted to quit every single day but I was making the present day equivalent of $115 / hour, $170 / hour on overtime. I didn't quit.

5. From zopy4949:

I heard this story from out safety lady at work, so it's not my story. She was working in Manitoba and they have some remote mines, like fly in fly out mines. A miner had quit his job, but the company was going to charge him several thousand dollars to fly him out. So, begrudgingly he stayed and worked, but not a week later he had a "heart attack". He was showing signs of actually having one so the rescue/first aid team our safety lady was on was called out and chartered a helicopter to get him to the nearest hospital. They arrive, it looks like a legitimate heart attack, so they get him out.

They're about 15-20 minutes from landing and this miner sits up. Obviously she attended to him and told him to lay down and be still, but he starts taking off his medical gear, and tells her that he snapped and needed out of there, and this was his only shot at getting out without paying several thousand dollars or waiting for another month for rotation.

Safety lady brought him into the hospital and he was cleared, confirmed healthy and they let him go after monitoring him for a few days I believe. He never went back to that mine, and he wasn't stuck with the bill because safety kept her mouth shut. She'd heard how bad that mine was, and if you don't know anything about Canadian mines, they'll work you until you drop, and then work over your body. Insane place to be, but smart guy.

6. From lucideye:

I worked offshore for a couple of years and loved it. Long hard hours for 2 weeks, and then a 2 week vacation. I was making great money, and bringing home tons of fish. The problem became getting to and from the platform. I was on the edge of blue water so, we took a 30 min helicopter ride each way. The training program was a little scary. They throw you in a mock up turn off the lights and flip it underwater and upside down. Then a few months down the line you see the helicopter safety record. X number of crashes per y number of flying hours. I calculate it out and it is a matter of years before I am in an incident of some kind. Hmmmmm, and then it f*cking happened.

I am half asleep at 5am sitting in the seat behind the pilot. This means I am facing backwards looking at 3 other passengers. All of a sudden I am weightless and the guy across from me is crossing himself. F*CK, i look over my shoulder out the windscreen and all I see is water. At the last moment we pull up and reduce our speed, but have a "soft" landing on the water. Pilot says he had a pelican coming right at us.

Just the week before I had heard about a pelican coming through the windscreen and killing the pilot instantly, then down went the chopper. We came pretty close to that apparently. A boat came out and picked us up to be brought back onshore. I went out 2 more times and could not bring myself to ride that copter anymore. F*ck this place it is bullsh*t, I am out of here.

7. From Forgive_My_Cowardice:

A former co-worker, Jason, told me this story. Jason was working at a dock in China that looked something like this, and unloaded shipping containers from huge international cargo ships. A typhoon had just passed, and many of the inbound ships had been delayed for days due to the extreme weather. Once the weather cleared, there was a backlog of ships waiting to be docked and unloaded. To make matters worse, a tropical depression had just been upgraded to a tropical storm, and was expected to make landfall within 48 hours.

It was organized chaos as the dock workers frantically tried to unload three times the volume of shipping containers in half the time. Jason was a Senior Cargo Agent, and his job was to verify that the information on the offloaded shipping containers matched the information on the manifest, and to visually inspect shipping containers for damage. A cargo agent had to sign off on all cargo before an unloaded ship could disembark. As there were a limited number of spaces for ships to dock, it was crucial that the cargo agents verify the unloaded shipments as quickly as possible so that another ship could dock immediately.

Everyone at the dock had walkie talkies (hand-held portable two-way radios), and Jason heard Dock Manager 1 going absolutely ape-sh*t because an unloaded ship had been waiting in the dock for nearly two hours, and no cargo agent had verified their delivery. Jason radioed Cargo Agent 1 assigned to that area, but there was no answer. He then radioed Cargo Agent 2, and still received no response. He then radioed the next closest Senior Cargo Agent 1 and asked him to drop everything and verify the cargo immediately.

After thirty minutes, Dock Manager 2 radioed that the ship was STILL docked. Jason then radioed Senior Cargo Agent 1 who he had sent over there, and did not receive a response. He then radioed Dock Manager 1 who had been screaming into the radio, and again received no response. Jason was now the only Senior Cargo Agent in the area, and it now fell to him to verify the unloaded shipment and get the delayed ship out of port ASAP.

As he got into his truck to drive over, a nagging feeling of dread kept telling him not to go. He ignored the feeling and drove there anyway, all the while trying and failing to radio anyone else in the area. When he arrived at the unloading zone, he couldn't bring himself to get out of the truck, and later said that it felt as if he was being physically pushed back into his seat.

Jason then picked up his radio with a shaking hand and broadcast, "Unknown threat near unloading section four. All workers evacuate immediately. This is not a drill." And just like that, a multi-billion dollar port was shut down.

A HazMat team was soon dispatched, and found that a shipping container damaged in transit had been carrying heavier than air inert gas. The gas leaked and displaced the air, then became trapped between several rows of closely stacked shipping containers. Every person that approached immediately lost consciousness. Five people were found dead near the damaged container, and Jason was later fired because he did not actually have the authority to shut down the port.

The Chinese equivalent to a wrongful termination lawsuit was filed, and Jason was strongly encouraged to settle, or else the Chinese government might find him partially responsible for the worker's deaths. As a white foreigner in China, this was a very real possibility, and he ended up settling for a modest amount. Jason still blames himself for the death of Senior Cargo Agent 1, and gave the settlement amount to the man's widow.

Edit 1: Please don't buy me gold. If you want to show appreciation, consider making a donation to Doctors Without Borders. They are an amazing organization, and even small donations will help make the world a better place. If you post proof of a donation, I'll match it, up to $100 in total (not per person, I'm not rich).

8. From undeadpenguins:

I don't usually work in extreme situations, I'm a directional drill operator for underground utilities, so it's fairly safe, but there was one job I had in Virginia for an electric conduit for a new launch pad for Wallops Island, where we had a very small amount of time to get a lot done.

There was a week long period where there was an intense thunderstorm every day, and we delayed the job as much as we could until we decided to say f*ck it and work through it because we were falling so far behind.

Directional drills have an alarm for when the machine is electrified by, say, drilling through a power line.

My strike alarm began to constantly chime from lightning crashes. I silently got in the truck and left.

9. From Khelek7:

Working over seas in East Africa, I was helping layout and design a human waste to fuel plant. the existing system is a 100 foot by 100 foot by 40 foot deep pit where the trucks come from the city to dump the waste. And then it just sits there. It was normally not terrible, except when trucks came by, then it stunk. And the flies... oh god the flies.

The first week I was there a truck came up to the pit, backed up, and a dude came out to open the valve to release the "honey." It shoots out then comes to a stop. It looked like a plastic bag had gotten stuck in there. First the guy tried hitting it with a pole or a shovel. That does not work. So he climbs out around the back of the truck (see 30 foot deep shit pit above), and then grabs it, and yanks. It pulls free and a horizontal geyser of shit blasts him in the face. I was like "nope."

Same location, happy story: A few weeks later a kitten was seen floating in the pit and meowing piteously. The local shit pit workers and landfill guys take pity on it and try to kill it with rocks, so it doesn't drown (f*cking dark, I know). My coworker was like "no! no! no!" and he found a rope, and a bucket and went sh*t-kitty fishing. And damn me did he not rescue that cat! He brought it home, washed it 1000 times, and last I heard it was doing fine.

10. From Saljuq:

Dad was a traveling salesman and was very dedicated. Insisted on cross-country trips for high end clients. Would go days without sleep, traveling through tribal areas and mountain highways dead of night.

But he was also a naïve guy in his 20s so...picked up a random hitchhiker because it was raining and he felt bad -__-...

The dude pulled a gun on him, told him stop the car. My dad had cash in the car, and in addition to being naïve, was also stubborn as sh*t and started accelerating. So if the guy shot him, the car would go flying off the hill. They reached some gas station with armed tribesmen (tribal people aren't very nice to criminals) and the hijacker quickly put his gun away, and walked off.

My dad left the business after a couple more reckless incidents and family pressure.

11. From rattfink:

They gave us a pizza party.

I spent a few months loading trucks for a major package shipping company. Every night, starting at 11PM, I would stack boxes, one every 12 seconds (supposedly). In one night, I'd fill at least one of those giant 18 wheeler trailers with boxes, crates, industrial materials, car parts, flowers-by-mail, presents, and an endless flow of amazon packages.

I worked each night with not enough sleep, doing exhausting labor, moving heavy dangerous machinery, and got heavy packages dropped on my head almost every night.

We got one 15 minute break a night. One day, during our break, they told us that our section had been the most productive in the shipping hub that month, and as such, we were going to be given pizza. By the way, we couldn't actually relax during our break, we had to listen to announcements and safety tips.

The next night, sure as god made little green apples, we got pizza. To eat as quickly as we could during our break. And as I sat there, eating my kinda stale, cheapest possible pizza, I thought to myself, "f*ck this. I don't need this job that bad."

I never went back after that shift.

12. From baddabuddah:

Was working as an arborist on a very windy day. I was up in a tree cutting branches that were constantly moving in the wind when I heard a snap. A tree beside me just broke in half. I noped out of there pretty damn quick.

13. From atreyal:

Idk if extreme but I have 9 years in the navy a submariner. My f*ck you moment that set it in was when we were working pretty much 14 hour days 7 days a week in dry dock. Think we did it for over a month and then we went out to sea for about 3 months. Glad I didn't have a family then but just being at work all the time and stuck in a metal tube for months on end just sucked. The couple of fond memories don't outweigh the massive number of stupid sh*t.

14. From FunkyFrunkle:

I work for a contracting company who handles a lot of maintenance in an iron ore mine up in Canada. One of the many sketchiest moments I've ever had was having to crawl on a structural beam 50 feet in the air underneath a floating crusher hopper and hold on occasionally when the haul trucks would dump 250+ tons of rocks only a couple feet above my head. What made it even more terrible wasn't the fact that the whole plant would shake but all the structural support plates actually reinforcing the hopper walls were all sheared off.

I've had hydraulic jacks break off their strong backs and go flying past my head, I've seen a coworker get launched six feet in the air by a belt being pulled taught by a shuttle, things fall down and nearly kill someone.

Not to mention heat exhaustion while working on the induration machines (building sized furnaces used to bake iron pellets), easily 122 degrees+. Or outside changing conveyor belt rollers in -40.

I've had my fair share of near misses and seen a bit of wild sh*t. Mines can be pretty dangerous. People do lose fingers, hands, arms and sometimes their lives. People like to think that we've improved in safety and in some aspects it's true. However, the attitude is still very much "You want a job? Do it."

15. From jaredaddy:

I used to work at a group home for troubled teens. One day during room searches, we found that the boys had smuggled in duct tape and had made wooden shanks. They were planning on taping down staff members and stabbing the f*ck out of us. I quit that day, my life is worth more than 9 dollars an hour.

16. From ThatIsMrDickHead2You:

Not me but my brother worked on a North Sea oil barge. His “buddies” found out he would be getting married after the current 2 week shift and in the middle of the night they pinned him down, shaved his entire body and gave him tattoos using indelible marker pens.

He had some explaining to do on his honeymoon and stopped working offshore after that.

17. From Th3Guns1ing3r:

Worked at a deep shaft coal mine and spent a few years as a production supervisor. We were moving equipment out of an old part of the mine that we were about to seal up. The roof was sagging and the floor was heaving. Seemed like every time we went for a return trip, the roof was closer and closer to the top of the hauler. Finally one of my employees used his right of refusal and said this is not safe, I'm not doing, and I was like, good enough for me, let's GTFO!

18. From HalifaxAl:

I worked 5 years in an iron ore concentrator plant and we had a few incidents with the project group building new things and putting them into use straight away, like a scats crusher that was supposed to crush scats before it being fed back into the primary mill , but when the milling steel balls got to a certain size they came out with the scats and went straight into the crusher and either cracked the mantle or blew the 48mm bolts that kept the shell on sky high at insane speeds - the problem was that this crusher was located at a spot where people frequently walked by and it could have easily killed people if they got hit by those bolts.

Another time we got a blocked pump in the dirty water recycle system, so me and a colleague went to check it out, asked the control room operator to start the pump and then we saw steam coming out of the pump house - which should have been a giveaway on our part. We stopped the pump and asked mechanics to come take a look at it. The normal procedure was just starting it at max speed to see if we could open the blockage , as it was usually after the pump discharge the blockage occurred.

The mechanics hooked up a hose to the drain of the pump and asked me to start it , and after I did they opened the valve and fed water in to the pump. We didn’t understand why the amps were so low on the pump, and we didn’t have time to find out . The moment the cold water hit the impeller , the pump exploded and threw half the pump house , motor , coupling, safety cage and ripped the concrete platform it was standing on in half - and all this flew 5 meters straight into the wall.

We heard the explosion in the control room on the other side of the site , and then the mechanics radioed up «call an ambulance, he’s bleeding!!» Turns out there was a blockage in the inlet as well as at the discharge end and the impeller ran scolding hot due to the pressure.

Most terrifying sh*t I have ever experienced! Luckily the mechanics had moved to the side of it, and one got hit by shrapnel from the explosion - but was fine. Had they been in front of it like we were just 20 mins before , someone would have died. Needless to say we were really careful with shit like that from then on, until the mine filed for bankruptcy a year later. I still get chills even writing about this.

19. From DanDalVlan:

I wrote a whole post about it right after it happened that gained some traction, but I was working in Afghanistan as a contract Air Traffic Controller when our compound was hit by a suicide truck bomber. I was laying in bed when my wall and window blew in and flew over me. Most of the glass stuck into the opposite wall, which means if I had been standing up I would have been seriously injured.

I ran to the "safe room" in my underwear with no shoes on, which caused me to cut my feet up from all the broken glass. The next day I was on a flight out.

Here's a photo of the bomb site. https://i.imgur.com/UlVB5WO.jpg

20. From Cdn_Nick:

Knew a drilling supervisor, who quit when the company we were with decided to do night moves with the rigs. In a previous job, one of his crew had been killed on a night move. His parting comment to me was "When the bucket of sh*t becomes heavier than the bucket of money, its time to move on".


16 of the funniest and most creative projects people have done at home while stuck in quarantine.

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If you're spending the quarantine binge-watching TV shows you've already watched and throwing your phone at the wall every time you see a news alert, it's ok.

While most of us have spent the last few weeks wondering how March could have possibly lasted thirty years and how we've run out of shows to watch and alcohol to drink, some people have taken this stressful time and turned their chaotic energy toward productive projects. Closets, bookshelves, junk drawers, basements and attics have never seen so much attention.

However, others have kicked it up a notch. With olympic-level quarantine games, family dance challenges, projects with pets, and home transformations for social distancing birthday parties and neighborhood parades, creativity definitely isn't being stifled in the quarantine.

Here are some of the best household projects people have been working on while isolating:

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21 Memes That Will Only Be Funny If You're Married And Quarantined.

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"Only married people can understand how you can be miserable and happy at the same time."

-Chris Rock

Being married can be hard, being married while quarantined during a global pandemic can be downright torture. While of course, you love your spouse, should two people really be forced to spend this much time together? These memes perfectly nail the feeling of being married and quarantined.

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16 reactions to Jared Kushner taking over the White House's response to the coronavirus.

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Jared Kushner, the president's son-in-law and senior advisor, addressed the nation on Thursday as one of the leaders of the White House's coronavirus response.

While some people were reassured by his presence in the midst of the biggest health and economic crisis in modern history, others questioned his qualifications and felt completely doomed.

Here's a taste of the reactions to his viral (no pun intended) appearance. The reactions are overwhelmingly negative, as most Trump supporters went on the offensive against the media rather than defend Kushner's performance. On Friday, a day after the press conference, #KushnerIsAnIdiot was trending on Twitter.

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20 women share things that men do to impress them that almost always backfire.

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Trying to impress people you're attracted to is hard work. All of us have suffered from foot-in-mouth at one point, or completely botched it when trying to peacock in the dating world. But there is definitely a marked difference between an awkward moment a pattern of behavior that is deeply unsavory.

The truth hurts, but it's often the tough love we need in order to grow into better people, and more importantly, score lots of hot dates.

So, in order to imbue men (who date women) with the honest feedback they may desire, women jumped on a popular Reddit thread to share the stuff men do to attract them that ultimately backfires.

1. From mermaidpaint:

On dating websites, post photos of them posing with at least 8 scantily clad women who work at the tropical resort that the guy is staying at.

2. From misspaperwait:

Going to into great detail about all the things they’re going to do when they get you in bed, and then doing exactly zero of those things.

Don’t bring me into the bedroom thinking I’m getting an evening of kink and pleasure when the reality is 10 seconds of jackhammer sex that’s only enjoyable for you.

3. From pantsRrad:

If you have to constantly tell people how big of a deal you are, you're not a big deal. Also don't be a jerk to the staff.

4. From purplestationary6616:

Trusting you know what your girl wants is not the same thing is telling her what she wants.

One is knowing her well enough to give her what she wants the other is doing what you want and telling her she should 'lighten up and give it a try.'

5. From lucky_719:

Dated a guy once that took the masculine thing too far. I couldn't call him cute without him flipping out. He wouldn't ever call anything cute either. Wouldn't even run his hands through my hair because it was too girly.

Guy I'm with now falls asleep playing with my hair and it is HEAVEN.

6. From hotpotato2442:

Lying to make themselves look smart. The truth will come out. And when it does, they will look like a dumba*s.

7. From puzzlekitty:

Messaging someone right off the bat with something like 'hey baby/sexy/slut, I bet you'd like it if I [insert detailed but poorly-written and grammatically incorrect sexual fantasy that borders on both violent and extremely awkward all at once]' No. No i would not like that, and no, this isn't....appealing? If I ask for your detailed sexy fantasies, that's one thing, but don't come out the gate with that sh*t, man.

8. From ChayoteSoup:

Order my food for me. Not in a cute, I know what she wants kind of way but a dominant a*shole kind of way.

I once was taken on a date, he insisted in driving and drove like a jacka*s there and back, blasted the same T-pain song over and over, then as we proceeded to order, he ordered everything for me, from the water to my horrible salad. I STILL PAID HALF THE BILL!!!!! One of the worst dates ever. 0 out of 10 would recommended dating this guy.

9. From med1a:

Being overprotective in a cringey way. I have nothing against a guy who is considerate but I really don’t need someone who wants to punch every other guy that just looks at me (or even someone who makes sh*t up like "I heard these strangers over there talking sh*t about you" and frowning at them) Like wtf dude, make me feel safe if you want to but don’t make me feel like I‘m made of glass.

10. From krasavetsa:

Talking about how they can “take down” someone. Okay you do that...

11. From PM-ME-A-CONFESSION-:

That lip licking movement in between the index and middle finger implying that they are good at cunningus. Yeah, yucks.

12. From keepusguessing:

Explaining that they're great at sex.

13. From Agreeable-Landscape:

I had an ex that would put on his "sultry" voice and tell me it's time for bed.

It really came out sounding creepy and not a bit romantic.

Physically, we had good times but I had to cringe past his verbal intro.

14. From phantomphandom:

Negging. Curse you early 2000's and your bullsh*t-ery.

15. From just_rebekka:

Trying to prove that they are smarter than me. Dude I want to be able to have a normal conversation with you. Stop interrupting me and actually listen for a second. You might recognize that I too have something interesting to contribute to the conversation.

16. From sleeeeepypanda:

Bragging about how expensive their house/car/boat/etc. is or how much money they make. It’s great to share your passions and talk about your job but if all you’re interested in is material items and money I’m immediately turned off.

17. From 5K1DMARK:

I H A T E when guys brag about having some clout on social media, i do not care how many followers you have i care about you as a person!

18. From kahluaann:

Talking about fights they've gotten in, saying how bad they wanna beat another guy's a*s, saying "I could kill that guy" or other belligerent things.

I do not care if you punch things. I do not care if you can overpower other men. I do not care if you are capable of killing people. Just be a good person and make good choices. Your pissing contests do not interest me.

19. From idiosyncrassy:

The Tinder squint which they think makes them look like a moody lead singer on an album cover, when it actually makes them look like Renee Zellweger smelled a fart.

20. From Nerdy_Wierdo:

A bit of a contradiction but when a guy is either a f*ckboy or a "nice guy."

No one, female or otherwise, needs some Grade A mega-douche making you feel inadequate nor does anyone need some spineless doormat putting people on a god damn pedestal and drop kick your a*s off of it the moment you reject him. Confidence and kindness are sexy/attractive in a man (and people in general) but not when someone takes it to the extreme.

22 Memes To Help Start Your Day Off With A Chuckle.

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"Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off."

-Bill Murray

Is there anyone who doesn't need a laugh right now? For just a minute or two release your worries, fears, and anxieties, and just... laugh. These memes are hilariously silly and will definitely help you start your day off on a positive note.

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