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Kesha addresses battle with Dr. Luke and Sony, fights tears and bigots in emotional speech.

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After a New York State court ruled that Kesha must continue to work with the producer that allegedly abused her, she became the focal point for a pro-woman, pro-survivor movement so positive, it almost makes the existence of "TiK ToK" worth it.

But whether you like the pop/party genre she epitomizes or not, her speech accepting the Visibility Award from the Human Rights Campaign is undeniably great (at the 9:00 mark, below).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=121&v=0nhP4Vr2sBo

Last year, the HRC gave the Visibility Award to Orange is the New Black actress Samira Wiley, for embracing "the power of being publicly out and visible as an LGBT person." Presenter Singer Wrabel explained that Kesha received the award for her own public support of the community.

"For any of you who know, I'm going through some personal things that have been really intense and hard lately, and I just want to say thank you for any support I've received," said Kesha, ostensibly referring to her legal struggle with Sony and Dr. Luke. 

She then ordered her mother in the audience to stop crying, and reminisced about being an "odd little kid with homemade clothes" in Nashville "with an inability to fit in," before brimming up to the obvious button: "Not a lot has changed."

"That's why my message has always been about being yourself and we really have to love each other and support each other. Believe me when I sing these words I'm talking... to myself as much as I'm talking to everyone else," she says as tears force her turn around. "Good god!" She faces the podium again to the audience's delight.

"I've said for years I'm not getting married until any two people in this country can get married. So thank f*cking god we finally crossed that bridge, it took long enough," said Kesha.

"We will not accept sexist double standards anymore. Here in Tennessee right now there are 25 anti-LGBT bills active this session that would roll back LGBT rights and hurt equality. Specifically one bill that would prevent transgender students from accessing appropriate sex segregated facilities consistent with their gender identity. I know people have been talking about that all night, but that's f*cked."

Cue cheers and whoops from all the liberals in Tennessee, seemingly each of whom was in the audience that night.


Rob Kardashian's Instagram claims 'ChyRo' are 'not broken up,' definitely proves he's a terrible photographer.

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On Sunday, Rob Kardashian posted an Instagram photo of him and Blac Chyna with a caption claiming they “are not broken up.” The black sheep of the Kardashian clan apparently thinks a weirdly close-up photo can save his relationship, despite the fact that his sisters allegedly can’t stand Chyna.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCo0wfLpWfL/

The full caption reads:

Chy (Blac Chyna) and I are not broken up. We just feel like it would be a lot healthier for our relationship if we kept a lot more to ourselves. It's impossible to have a positive relationship with so much negativity from the media and outsiders and we would appreciate it if everyone respects that.

The horrible quality close-up selfie of the couple comes after both deleted photos and references to a breakup on Instagram this past Sunday, People reported. One of the posts Chyna deleted on Instagram had a caption that said: "When you just get out of a relationship & you hoe friend welcomes you back into the World of Hoe."

Is the "World of Hoe" a good or bad thing? Either way, if Rob's post is actually true, Chyna can say bye-bye to it entirely.

Rob also captioned his new photo with a diamond ring emoji, so... yeah who knows. One thing that's definitely real, not a rumor, 100 percent true—Kendall Jenner’s nipple ring.

At least there's that.

This two-year-old girl couldn't get her pants on, so naturally she called 911 for help.

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Greenville County Sheriff's Deputy Martha Lohnes arrived at a South Carolina home and found a crime scene no one on the force had ever seen before. The victim? 2-year-old Aaliyah Garrett. The perp? A pair of stubborn jeans. The toddler had called 911 after getting into an aggravated struggle with the pants, to which Officer Lohnes responded and prevented the quarrel from further escalation by helping Aaliyah get the pants on.

Lohnes explained her encounter in a post on the police department's Facebook page.

https://www.facebook.com/permalink.php?story_fbid=338507522939554&id=274184402705200

Aaliyah's father told reporters that they'd always encouraged their child to call 911 if she needed help, but clarified that Aaliyah didn't understand what situations were appropriate to warrant police intervention. "I think we should have expressed what we meant."

The pants were not charged with any misconduct.

Kelly Clarkson says Dr. Luke’s label blackmailed her into working with him, calls him a liar.

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Although Kesha lost her most recent legal battle against Dr. Luke in the New York State Supreme Court, the case has begun a movement that's even bigger than "Timber." Stars like Lena Dunham and Lady Gaga are voicing their support for Kesha, and now Kelly Clarkson has done so in describing her own sh*tty experience with Dr. Luke.

Last month, Clarkson expressed her support for Kesha with a pretty slick tweet:

https://twitter.com/kelly_clarkson/status/700804809499271168?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

Monday morning, Clarkson discussed her own experience with the alleged-monster Dr. Luke on the Australian radio show KIIS 1065. She says that he is "not a good person" and says that his record label "blackmailed" her into working with him in 2004, and again in 2009.

She explains:

They were like, 'We will not put your album out if you don’t do this.' It was a really hard time for me. And you know, we have a whole crew to support and people that depend on us for their livelihood, so sometimes you just have to make those decisions and swallow that pill.

Clarkson adds that while she supports Kesha, she can't speak to her particular case, and that Luke "never did anything like that to me." But while she is not a witness in Kesha's case, she is certainly a witness to Luke's bad character, explaining:

He’s just not a good person to me. We’ve clashed.  He’s just not a good guy to me. Obviously he’s a talented dude, but he’s just lied a lot. I’ve run into a couple really bad situations where, musically, it’s been really hard for me because he will just lie to people. And then it makes the artist look bad. And he’s kind of difficult to work with, kind of demeaning.

Her comments about Luke begin at the 1:23:40 mark.

https://soundcloud.com/kiis1065/7316-kyle-and-jackie-o-show-449

Miley Cyrus throws shade at 'Fuller House' star Jodie Sweetin on Instagram for no reason.

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Between photos of bong rips and general marijuana paraphernalia, Miley Cyrus posted a photo of Fuller House star and recovered addict Jodie Sweetin in the days before her addiction was in recovery.

After Full House wrapped in 1995, Sweetin struggled with addiction to alcohol, methamphetamine and crack, and also married thrice. Now sober, starring in a show again and raising two daughters, she'd most likely want to forget that dark period, but Cyrus was like "lol no."

Cyrus posted a picture of Sweetin during those tough times, straddling a dude, with what appears to be Dave Coulier's face photoshopped on.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCjCwBqQzK5/

Fans of Sweetin and Cyrus commented that this was uncool.

Despite the backlash, Cyrus left the photo up, but began posting more flattering pictures of former child stars, like this one of what appears to be Hilary Duff's Tinder profile.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCjagq_wzC1/?taken-by=mileycyrus

Hey Miley, when it comes to shaming former addicts, "Have mercy!" and/or "Cut. It. Out."

Woman posts photos of her skin cancer to scare you straight about not using tanning beds.

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In 1995, when Judy Cloud was 28, she went to see a dermatologist to check out what she thought was a scab. It turned out the "scab" was actually skin cancer.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10204679350334273&set=a.10204679349934263.1073741841.1551401203&type=3&theater

The Indianapolis woman was diagnosed with basal cell carcinoma, which according to the Skin Cancer Foundation is the most common form of skin cancer. It rarely spreads and is treatable, but if left untreated, it can become life-threatening.

Now, 21 years later, Cloud is documenting her long struggle with the illness on Facebook, posting pictures of her face and body post-surgery. She hopes that the photos of her stitches and scars will scare others into wearing sunscreen and staying away from tanning beds.

And you know what, it's a good plan.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10204679350694282&set=pb.1551401203.-2207520000.1457360676.&type=3&theater

In a Facebook photo album titled "Skin Cancer," Cloud wrote about her fourth and most recent surgery in September 2015. Doctors removed 23 spots of basal cell carcinoma, 10 by excision (removal by scalpel which must be stitched up afterwards) and 13 by laser. The surgery took three hours under general anesthesia, and Cloud had to take the following two weeks off of work—her recuperation required that she remain immobile, either on the couch or in bed, with her legs elevated at all times to avoid blood clots. She writes that she also couldn't take a shower during those two weeks, because her lower legs were completely wrapped and she couldn't get them wet.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10204679351494302&set=a.10204679349934263.1073741841.1551401203&type=3&theater

In order to remove cancer that had gone deeper than her skin, doctors had to cut into muscle in her mouth, necessitating a soft-food diet for two weeks after surgery. Four weeks after the operation, she still couldn't open her mouth all the way or chew anything particularly crunchy. The area above her mouth was still numb, making drinking from a cup somewhat tricky. Due to another spot of cancer that had grown over a nerve in her forehead, the doctor had to remove the nerve altogether, so Cloud has no feeling in most of her forehead. It's not clear yet whether the feeling in that part of her face will ever come back.

In an an interview with Self magazine, Cloud, 49, reveals that growing up, she was never cautious about the sun. She got frequent sunburns just like lots of kids and teens do, and when she was in 20s, she used a tanning bed about four times a year, despite the fact that she had a family history of skin cancer.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10204679351254296&set=pb.1551401203.-2207520000.1457360676.&type=3&theater

According to the Skin Cancer Foundation, one in five Americans will get skin cancer within their lifetime, making it the most common form of cancer in the United States. Studies have shown that the risk of melanoma, the most dangerous type of skin cancer, is increased by 75 percent in people who use a tanning bed before the age of 30.

Cloud told Self: “My 20-year-old self would never share [these pictures] and my 30-year-old self would never share them, but when my doctor said I was going to have another surgery, I said, ‘I’m going to document it this time and post it afterwards.' I never thought I would show myself on Facebook without makeup on let alone without makeup on and looking so injured. But, I’m old enough now to know this is needed.”

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10204679353094342&set=pb.1551401203.-2207520000.1457360676.&type=3&theater

In her Skin Cancer photo album on Facebook, she wrote:

The face seems to be the fastest area to heal. The wounds on my arm, chest, shoulder, and legs are taking much longer to heal. I now have a 3” scar and a 2-1/2” scar on my chest, along with several laser scars. Does that sound worth it for you to keep going to a tanning bed? The removal of the skin cancer on my legs left indentations. The indentations won’t go away, although the scars will fade in time. Keep in mind that I went to a very skilled, very good plastic surgeon for removal of my skin cancer. Many times, a dermatologist will whack off the area, and believe me, a dermatologist doesn’t typically take quite the care that a plastic surgeon does - even on the face.

Total billed for my outpatient procedure? $26,845.87. I know tanning salons advertise tanning packages that are cheap. Does a surgery to correct what the tanning bed does to you still make the tanning special sound cheap?

I’m really hoping the thought of going to a tanning bed no longer sounds quite so attractive to you.

Mission accomplished. Also a lot cheaper than $27,000? Gallon jugs of sunscreen lotion on Amazon.com.

Watch cool mom Beyoncé perform 'I Will Always Love You' at a school fundraiser for Blue Ivy.

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On Saturday, Beyoncé made a surprise appearance at a fundraising benefit for the Los Angeles elementary school attended by her four-year-old daughter, Blue Ivy. Along with a band and a couple of backup dancers, she performed a few songs for the lucky audience at the Center for Early Education’s 75th Anniversary Gala at the Shrine Auditorium. Her setlist including "Crazy In Love," "Halo," and a cover of Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You"—during which she encouraged everyone to sing along...

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCmiiZ8pkIK/

...but when Bey is singing, there's really no need for anyone else to step in.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCmgRqFpkEt/

What a treat for all the unsuspecting parents, faculty members, and financial backers in the audience!

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCmrrLIJkFI/

And what a total slap in the face to any other performer who thought his or her performance would matter at all. Maybe next year!

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCnmv14JkMF/

Public displays of disaffection.


Paparazzi catching a shirtless Zac Efron is the one good thing about the 'Baywatch' reboot.

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Paparazzi are usually scum, of course, but even Zac Efron had to give props to the paparazzo that caught a perfect, ab-crazy photo of Efron's shirtless body holding a rope on the set of the Baywatch reboot. Seriously:

https://twitter.com/ZacEfron/status/706357316287762432

Holy mother of hell.

Efron gained some serious muscle for the totally unnecessary movie based on the crappy 90s TV show. Thanks, in part, to a mentorship from co-star Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson:

https://twitter.com/ZacEfron/status/706561869994020864

"Production for the day has ended, all the extras are going home and the sun's going down," wrote Johnson in a caption on that same photo. "Me and @zacefron refuse to quit in a tire shrugging contest that lasted for hours. Why? Because we're #BAYWATCH, we're bad ass and we're a slightly dysfunctional family."

"On a side discipline note," he continued, "juuuuuust wait til you see the insane shape my boy Efron got in for our movie. Proud of the hard work he put in. That's the way you make a character 'Iconic'. I still kicked his candy ass though in this contest."

Efron has an insane body, but The Rock has the insanest body. Never forget it.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCCORJboh5E/?taken-by=therock

Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris celebrate one-year anniversary with folksy charm.

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March 6, 2016 may have seemed like just another day to you, but that's because you are not Taylor Swift. March 6 was actually a magical day, one that many Swift fans never thought they'd see—her one-year anniversary with her boyfriend, DJ, and record producer Calvin Harris. One year! They did it! (Cue the falling of 366 balloons.)

https://twitter.com/SlayerSwift13/status/706595242506592256

And what a Very Pinterest Anniversary it was! The pop music power couple celebrated their day in typically adorable fashion—Harris posted a Snapchat video of Swift nodding enthusiastically at a very homemade-looking cake covered with chocolate frosting and red hearts, with "1 Year" written in white icing.

Swift, in turn, posted a picture on Instagram of Harris' gift to her—a gold locket engraved with 3-6-15, the day they officially started dating. Her caption read: "One year down."

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCoRu5ajvBD/

A source told E! that the locket holds "something special," but wouldn't elaborate. It's a bit small for one of her Grammys, and with no air holes it's probably not a puppy.

What could be in there?

 

Royal Family releases adorable family ski vacation pics. Reminder: they don’t have jobs.

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Remember when Prince William and Princess Kate graced Twitter commoners with an adorable Christmas family photo back in December? Well, the Royal Family has done it again. On Monday morning, Kensington Palace unveiled ultra-cute photos of the royal highnesses and their lovely children, Prince George and Princess Charlotte, playing in the snow.

https://twitter.com/KensingtonRoyal/status/706782120245661697https://twitter.com/KensingtonRoyal/status/706784927971459072https://twitter.com/KensingtonRoyal/status/706783844599472128

A Kensington Palace spokesperson told E! Online:

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge are delighted to share new photographs of their family. The images show Their Royal Highnesses enjoying a short skiing holiday with their children in the French Alps. This was their first holiday as a family of four and the first time either of the children had played in the snow.

Aside from the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge looking somewhat uncomfortable in these photos, the members of the Royal Family are undeniably natural models. They should really consider side careers in posing for stock photography—They'd quickly corner the market on searches for "Caucasian family ski vacation."

Canadian province will test guaranteed 'basic income' program, also known as FREE MONEY.

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While America remains torn over socialized healthcare, Canada's long since checked that one off the list and is now considering a social program that would presumably make the GOP weep for the dream of small government. The province of Ontario will serve as a guinea pig for the country's new project where they give citizens free money every month. Sincere apologies if this news makes your Trump-thumping uncle so incredulous his "Make America Great Again" mug shatters in his hand.

The Ontario government announced the project in February, according to the Huffington Post, though the costs and start date are unknown. According to the Basic Income Canada Network (BICN), the concept of guaranteed income, which has been gaining steam since the 1960s, would decrease reliance on other social programs and is meant to ensure "everyone an income sufficient to meet basic needs and live with dignity, regardless of work status."

The pilot project will test a growing view at home and abroad that a basic income could build on the success of minimum wage policies and increases in child benefits by providing more consistent and predictable support in the context of today’s dynamic labour market

Sheila Regehr, chair of BICN, explained in a statement that Ontario's just the beginning.

We need it rolled out across Canada, and Quebec too is in the game, so there’s no reason why people and governments in other parts of this country need sit on the sidelines – it’s time for us all to get to work

The idea is already popular in several Scandinavian countries, and was even reportedly touted by Richard Nixon in 1969. Tech Insider's report responds to the question that automatically crosses the minds of most uncles/critics: won't this make people lazy and not want to work, especially all you millennials with that dastardly sense of entitlement?

While one kneejerk reaction is to argue that free money creates a lazy working class, research suggests the opposite is true. Supported by the financial safety net, people in one 2013 study actually worked 17% longer hours and received 38% higher earnings when basic income was given a shot.

The appeal of the idea may even cross party lines, argues The Globe And Mail, due to versions of it coming with a "drastic reduction in social programs such as welfare and unemployment insurance."

How's it sound to your uncle now?

Khloé Kardashian says plastic surgery is 'almost like makeup,' since she's a Kardashian.

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Khloé Kardashian—a woman who, as Amy Schumer memorably put it, is part of "a whole family of women who take the faces they were born with as a light suggestion"—is pro-plastic surgery. Go figure. Even as she still maintains that she hasn't had plastic surgery herself, Kardashian told Cosmopolitan that she's not opposed:

I think plastic surgery should be viewed almost like makeup, because we're all putting on a f*cking mask basically every day anyway. When you dye your hair, you're changing who you are, and I don't think there's anything wrong with that. I think people should get plastic surgery or fillers or lasers or whatever if they want it — that should be your own personal decision. I just don't like when someone else is like, 'Man, I only want to date a girl if they have big tits,' and then a girl's like, 'I gotta get double-Ds.' If you want them, great. If you're doing that for your man, that's when it bothers me.

She also denied getting a nose job, saying that the huge changes in her face over the past several years has been from weight loss and make-up changes. "It's like when you're pregnant, your nose spreads because there's fat pockets in there, I guess," she said. "So when I lost weight, my nose did get smaller, and also I now know about contouring. Like when I wash my face, my nose is wider."

As a reminder, on the left is what Kardashian looked like in 2008. On the right is what she looks like now.

Obviously, she looks very different, but upon closer inspection, it's clear that a few things are going on. She's now tanner, for one, and her hair is lighter and more flattering to her face shape. Her make-up is also significantly better (and caked on in that trademark Kardashian way). And yes, she's lost a lot of weight. Keeping all that in mind, her nose, in fact, looks very similar to how it once was. 

Anyway, this has been another post about the Kardashians, and you clicked on it.

Related: Kourtney Kardashian shows some nipple on Instagram, and her ex, Scott Disick, leaves a creepy comment.

Racy University of Moncton commercial angers stuffy professors, leads to huge increase in applications.

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Universities have a long and storied tradition of being hormonally charged hot-pots where just-legal adults find themselves with minimal supervision and complete in control of their own time. You can also get an education at them. For years, colleges and universities have chose primarily to advertise the former, not the latter. Last year, however, Canada's University of Moncton released a commercial that paired a sense of academic rigor with... well, two students exchanging saliva in a library. Faculty and staff didn't like the ad—one employee called it "pathetic"—but last week it won Best Higher Ed Recruitment Video of 2015 from Kira Academic, a video admissions platform that helps schools recruit students.

Why? Because it worked. According to Kira, "the University of Moncton saw a 22% increase in applicants the year following this campaign." And that's not just because future college students love tonguing; it's because showing a scene that made the college look like a CBS medical drama got people talking, whether they loved it or hated it. Just look at this article. People are still discussing it!

Here's the ad, if you're interested in learning more about the college or you enjoy watching college students make out:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSwSIALZZqE

There is no information on how much of an increase of University of Moncton has seen in students trying to have sex in the library since the ad aired. Hopefully it's a lot.

5 people having a worse Monday than you.

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5. Miley Cyrus, because people aren't happy she took a potshot at Jodie Sweetin on Instagram.

Miley Cyrus in her pajamas.

If you don't know who Jodie Sweetin is, that just proves exactly how weird this story is. Why is Miley Cyrus, an A-list celebrity, using her social media dominance to take cheap shots at a D-list celebrity? Only Miley's therapist could answer that question, and that person must be very, very busy.

Jodie Sweetin is best remembered for her role as Stephanie Tanner on Full House, and its recent revival, Fuller House. She's also known for having serious problems with addiction, but everyone knows those are all in her past. Everyone except Miley Cyrus, who, on Saturday, chose to post some truly embarrassing pictures of Sweetin in her party days to Instagram.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCjCwBqQzK5/

Cyrus captioned the photo "Current Mood #fullerhouse." While it's not clear exactly what she meant, the end result is the same: public humiliation for the troubled Sweetin. Even a heart-to-heart with Bob Saget playing her understanding father couldn't soothe this pain.

The good news is, everyone took her side. The comments on Cyrus's post were overwhelmingly critical:

These haters have a point. Sweetin is sober now, but Cyrus is still partying hard. It's pretty hypocritical of her to make fun. Next she'll be dissing Sweetin for wearing someone else's retainer.

4. Kourtney Kardashian, because she and Scott Disick are getting messy on social media.

Kourtney and Scott in tanner times.

Speaking of dirty laundry being aired on the Internet, this story reeks. It also involves addiction, plus it's about a former couple. So if you have any sense of propriety, stop reading now.

Of course you didn't. Kourtney Kardashian's ex, Scott Disick, with whom she shares three children, has had plenty of problems with alcohol in the past. Last fall, he completed a 30-day rehab program. But now he's fallen off the wagon harder than an inexperienced Amish farmhand. He spent Friday night partying with Johnny Football in Las Vegas, during which Kardashian posted this extremely sad tweet:

https://twitter.com/kourtneykardash/status/706003438044209152

Before you get too emotional, you should hear what happened next. It was weird. Late on Sunday night, she posted an Instagram picture featuring a hint of nipple, in keeping with her family's tradition of being naked.

Photo censored. Her nipple doesn't actually look like a Someecards logo (unfortunately).

There was nothing unusual about this selfie (for a Kardashian), but Disick's response was certainly unusual. And icky. He apparently felt it was the right time to leave a comment:

Yikes.

Come on, Scott. Get it together man.

3. The LAPD, because the new evidence in the O.J. Simpson case makes them look really bad.

In lighter news, here's news about a double homicide. But not just any double homicide—the most famous, star-studded homicide of all time. The O.J. Simpson murder trial, which gripped the world 20 years ago, is hot once again, thanks to the FX miniseries American Crime Story: The People v. O.J. Simpson.

O.J. Simpson, posing with a normal-sized head for scale.

Everyone is getting back into O.J. mania, not least of all the LAPD, who have reopened the investigation after new evidence came to light. Actually, it came to light years ago. That's the problem.

Here's what happened: In 2002, a construction worker found a knife buried on O.J. Simpson's former estate. He turned it over to an LAPD officer, who for God knows what reason took it home as a souvenir. Then, when he saw the Cuba Gooding Jr. miniseries, he decided maybe it was relevant, and alerted the department.

Of course, by now, there's very little chance any DNA evidence will remain on the knife, whether or not it was actually the murder weapon. But this whole debacle is proving to the public just how mismanaged the initial investigation was. The cop who received the knife claims that he told LAPD brass about it in 2002 and was informed they had no interest.

It's starting to become clear how O.J. was acquitted in the first place. The LAPD is taking its investigation tips from The Simpsons:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=20mBi8-QsSc

2. These cyclists who had to pedal for their lives from a furious ostrich.

Here's a story that has nothing to do with addiction, broken relationships, or murder. Just good, wholesome murderous animals. Three cyclists were visiting South Africa for the Cape Argus Tour when they had a close encounter with one of that country's most terrifying birds: an ostrich. The flightless monster spotted them riding by and gave chase, presumably enraged by their spandex shorts. Luckily, one of the athletes, Oleksiy Mishchenko, was able to film the moment.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kotWv4MCxNI

It's like a scene from a Road Runner cartoon, except it doesn't end with anyone slamming into a tunnel painted onto a cliff face. That could have happened after Mishchehnko stopped filming, though.

1. North Carolina drivers who tried to pay fake parking tickets and got Rickrolled.

Getting a parking ticket is annoying enough without the realization that you've just been trolled by some Internet-loving punks. But that's exactly what happened to at least two drivers in Asheville, North Carolina. They received what looked like authentic tickets on their vehicles, fining them for $100. But they were fake.

The ticket on the right is the forgery. The one on the left is from someone who actually sucks at parking.

The phony tickets included a QR code that the recipients could scan with their phones to pay or appeal online. (That should have been a dead giveaway—no police department is that good with technology.) But when the frustrated drivers scanned the code, they were not sent to the Asheville Parking Services website. Where they did wind up would be painfully familiar to anyone who used the Internet between 2007 and 2012.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ

The poor souls were Rickrolled, a "beloved" Internet prank where a supposedly legitimately link actually sends you to the music video for Rick Astley's 1987 song "Never Gonna Give You Up." The prank has been played many millions of times in the past 10 years, but perhaps never so cruelly as this.

Was it worth it for these pranksters? They put a lot of work into forging those tickets, and never got to see the faces of their victims. But Rickrolling is always, and has always been, a complete waste of time. Even when it doesn't have deadly consequences.


Man with amazing reflexes saves kid distracted by smartphone from flying baseball bat.

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A man with incredible reflexes saved the day this past weekend at a spring training game between the Pittsburgh Pirates and the Atlanta Braves outside Orlando. A kid in the stands was apparently so bored with the off-season game that he was staring at his smartphone instead of the field. When a baseball bat came flying toward his face, he didn't notice until it was way too late. Luckily, the man sitting next to him (maybe his dad) shot out his arm to stop the bat just millimeters from the kid's nose.

https://twitter.com/Hornerfoto1/status/706498326049464320?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

Two photos shared by sports photojournalist Christopher Horner perfectly capture the kid's dopey, slack-jawed expression as he belatedly realizes what's up. In the first, his thumb is still poised over the phone to re-start whatever game he was playing once he finds out what everyone is yelling about. 

"Huh, when did the Pirates swap out Andrew McCutchen for that giant arm?"

In the second photo, the bat is behind the boy and has turned a full 180 degrees.

Honorable mention to that guy in the red shirt for trying to reason with the bat.

Luckily, it seems no fans or phones were hurt in the incident. Unfortunately, no lessons about keeping your eye on the bat were learned, either.

Related: 13 times dad reflexes saved the day.

Singer's video shows the musical evolution of Disney princesses from Snow White to Elsa.

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Last Thursday, singer Evynne Hollens released a video of her take on the iconic songs of 14 Disney princesses. In Hollens' aptly titled video, "Evolution Of The Disney Princess," she illustrates how the princesses developed over the years, beginning with Sleeping Beauty in 1937 and ending with Elsa from Frozen. Take a look:

https://youtu.be/JDvylXjDt8g

Not only did Hollens do a great job on the vocals, but her costume game was on another level of fleek. Hopefully, she didn't drop a ton of moolah like this woman did to look like every single Disney princess.

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Mom's post about her baby daughter's unusual facial birthmark goes viral.

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Charlie Crenshaw is six months old and lives with her mom, dad, and older brother in Atlanta, GA. Her mom, Katie, posts tons of pictures of her kids and writes a blog called Twelve and Six. Charlie is your typical cute, happy, bubbly little girl, who just happens to have a (not even that unusual) birthmark on her face.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCWAwTSluC5/

Recently, Crenshaw got a little tired of all the comments from people on her blog and Instagram saying how sorry they were about how she looked, worrying about the little girl's health, and even going so far as suggesting that Crenshaw turn her daughter's head in photos to only show her "good side."

https://www.instagram.com/p/BBcuEy9luMX/

In an interview with BuzzFeed, Crenshaw said the comments were annoying because “it was the only thing anyone wanted to talk about anymore. We had moved on and just wanted to talk about normal baby things."

https://www.instagram.com/p/BA2Ci9OluNY/

So Crenshaw decided to address the topic once and for all on her blog, in a post titled, "What's Wrong With Her Face?" She starts off by explaining what the birthmark actually is.

First, Hemangioma 101. A capillary hemangioma is a vascular tumor that can range in size and shape. It’s a birthmark, essentially. Sometimes they are referred to as “strawberries”. Hemangiomas are a defect that occurs extremely early in pregnancy when the vascular system is developing. There is no known cause or prevention. . . . For us, any other complication were eliminated and Charlie’s hemangioma was deemed cosmetic. She is observed by her specialists to make sure it doesn’t ever obstruct her vision and she takes a daily medication to keep it from growing any larger. Most hemangiomas involute or disappear eventually.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCO3PMMluGC/

She goes on:

We don’t need to talk about it every time you look at her. We see past the color of her face. Charlie is Charlie and it’s part of who she is. It doesn’t need to be constantly commented on, critiqued, or questioned. While I don’t mind educating curious minds, I don’t need your opinion on how it its progress or the affect it may have on her. It’s a part of her unique beauty. It may never disappear, and guess what? It doesn’t have to. I would much rather chat about her latest milestone achievement, her amazing smile, or how gorgeous her eyes are.

She isn’t in pain or ill. She simply has an unusual quality about her appearance. The most common sentiments are “I’m praying that it goes away.” Or “Bless her poor little heart.” I’m constantly being asked “When will that go away?” I’ve even heard things as harsh as “turn her to her good side” or “Too bad, she’s so pretty otherwise”.

I encourage you to, instead of praying it will disappear, pray that she grows into a confident girl who loves herself no matter what she looks like. Pray that constant comments and opinions from friends, family and strangers will end before she’s old enough to overhear them. Pray that she will be a strong person in the in an age where we are bullied for any number of reasons.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BBvsT6yluKs/

Crenshaw told BuzzFeed that she hopes sharing Charlie’s story will help “normalize ‘differences’ in appearances.” She ended her blog post by writing:

Hold the pity. She’s a healthy baby girl and we are blessed. Her hemangioma is just as insignificant to who she is as a freckle on her arm. You don’t need to mention it, and you don’t need to wish it away.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BBr8K_BFuFn/

Related: Awesome parents get tattoos to match their daughter's unusual birthmark so she'll never feel alone.

Viral essay explains what it's like to be 'the fat person next to you on the plane.'

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It's a common premise in sitcoms and sketches: the protagonist is seated next to person of considerable size on an airplane, and "hilarity" ensues as they are squished together in the sky for a few hours.

Even dumb stock illustrations play into this trope.

Ricky Gervais, known for his general niceness, added his voice to the Choir of Fat Jokes in a standup special, saying that overweight people wear their own carry on baggage.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xgIUYDToCNc

Daniel Tosh did a rapid-fire round about a fat guy on a plane, even joking that "If I was sitting in the middle seat, I'd be praying for Al Qaeda to blow this plane up."

Tosh.0
Get More: Comedy Central

 

It turns out that overweight people have feelings, and the reality of flying while fat is fraught with anxiety and inconvenience.

Under the pseudonym Your Fat Friend, a traveler wrote a piece on Mediumabout their experience. It soon started trending because it resonated with a lot of people.

The challenge starts way before boarding. They wrote:

There’s so much that happens before I even buy a ticket. I research policies, because every airline has one now for “passengers of size.” All of them include the possibility that I will be charged double, or denied a seat on the plane on the day of the flight, leaving me to explain to my boss, partner, friend, family why they won’t be seeing me this week.

The anxiety doesn’t subside once I buy a ticket — it distills, intensifying for weeks leading up to the flight. I think about how to eliminate every other stressor. Passengers hate it when someone takes too long loading their bag into the overhead compartments. I pay to check a bag, so that my fellow passengers won’t have any additional reasons to complain about me.

They write about being hyper-aware of what everyone else is thinking, feeling all eyes on them:

Boarding begins. I line up first, not because I am impatient, but because I’ve selected a window seat, and I want to be settled before anyone else in my row. If I have to step past them, I will hear the familiar, belabored, disdainful sigh. The throat cleared, the muffled groan. These are the sounds of my body being seen in public.

I get on the plane, get into my seat, fix my eyes on the baggage handlers below, and avoid interacting with anyone unless they address me first. I grasp my arm and cross my ankles, making my fat body as small as possible. I have carefully observed what makes other passengers snap at fat passengers, roll their eyes, complain to staff. For me, these are inviolable norms.

Your Fat Friend writes about how the experience in the air is a microcosm for what happens on the ground:

... Air travel is sadly familiar, a microcosm of what happens so often as a fat person. I am watched — and judged harshly — as I try — and fail — to fit into a space that was made for someone else. I am always too big, always too much, always unacceptable. I must make myself smaller and smaller, reducing and reducing endlessly, my stubborn body resisting at every turn. Still, I am never quite small enough to make anyone else comfortable.

Read the whole piece here. 

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