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Happy Mother's Day to my second least embarrassing parent on Facebook.

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May 9, 2013, 8:30 am

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Happy Accidental Mother's Day.

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May 9, 2013, 8:50 am

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Happy Mother's Day to someone who carried me for 9 months physically and for...

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May 9, 2013, 9:20 am

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Happy Mother's Day to someone smart enough to avoid motherhood.

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May 9, 2013, 9:30 am

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Happy Mother's Day to a MILF porn enthusiast.

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May 9, 2013, 9:44 am

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Happy Mother's Day to a new mom who has yet to mess up someone else's life.

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May 9, 2013, 11:42 am

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Mom, it's so great how much closer we've gotten since you started texting...

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May 9, 2013, 11:47 am

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Mom, You'll always be my best friend when I can't stand my best friends.

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May 9, 2013, 12:01 pm

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Mom Coupon: Good for one feigned enthusiastic response to hearing about the...

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May 10, 2013, 7:18 am

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Happy awkward Mother's Day to all the stepmothers out there.

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May 10, 2013, 7:30 am

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Mom, I hope to someday he half as brilliant, generous, and beautiful as you...

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May 10, 2013, 8:01 am

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Happy Mother's Day to someone I'd love to recklessly impregnate this weekend.

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May 10, 2013, 8:32 am

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Mom, I can't even imagine how proud you are of me for remembering to send you...

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May 10, 2013, 8:47 am

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Whole Foods accidentally tricks vegans into eating like humans have for...

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May 10, 2013, 9:03 am

Read the full article at TheGist.com >>

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I don't need a holiday devoted to moms to spend the weekend in a spiral of...

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May 10, 2013, 9:16 am

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Mom, let's celebrate the commercialization of our love with an overpriced...

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May 10, 2013, 10:15 am

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Happy Mother's Day to someone who'll be a great mom by her second child.

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May 10, 2013, 10:44 am

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Happy Mother's Day to someone who's not just hot for a mom.

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May 10, 2013, 11:01 am

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I hope you put more planning into my Mother's Day celebration than I did into...

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May 10, 2013, 11:45 am

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Happy Mother's Day to someone I hope is my last stepmother.

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May 10, 2013, 12:03 pm

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