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Let's kiss on New Year's Eve 2013 as if we might have a future together in 2014.

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I want to kiss you at midnight and pork you at dawn.

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The most unsettlingly honest confessions of 2013.

Make a memorable first impression.  There’s no better feeling than the rush of relief after sharing a disgraceful secret with a trusted confidant or the entire Internet. At least, that must be what...

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Let's put significant pressure on ourselves to have a fun New Year's Eve.

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If stock photos reviewed your resume.

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The 35 things you wished you'd said to coworkers in 2013.

Here's your new email signature. With human resources constantly going on about their silly rules concerning "etiquette" and "proper workplace discourse" and "not making overt threats of violence to...

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My New Year's resolution is to lose just enough weight so that my gut doesn't...

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Thanks for not laughing at my absurdly unattainable New Year's resolutions.

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It may be the antidepressants talking, but I'm feeling somewhat optimistic...

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My New Year's resolution is to drink less next New Year's.

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Don't forget it's 2014 when you're writing this year's bad checks.

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My New Year's resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about...

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I hope one of your New Year's resolutions is to stop tagging me in New Year's...

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It's time to renew that gym membership we're never going to use again.

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Sorry a snowstorm helped you already justify blowing all 17 of your New...

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Shoveling snow out of your driveway is a great justification for shoveling...

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Nothing could get in the way of me celebrating your birthday except bad...

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Let's bond over the periodic inconvenience of atmospheric precipitation.

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I'd brave taking off my gloves in record cold temperatures to text you...

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After being off work for so long I forgot what it is that I pretend to do...

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