Not cool, lion cub.

There is plenty of video proof that some dogs are afraid of cats. Those clips are cute and funny because the conventional wisdom is that dogs shouldn't be afraid of cats. In this case, the dog has every reason to be afraid, because the cat in this scenario is, you know, an apex predator! Even if the lion is still a cub, the dog is smart enough to know this is the kind of cat capable of taking out larger prey than tinfoil balls and shadows.

The video was shot at Cornellskop Animal Training Farm in South Africa, where they train animals to perform in films and television commercials. So, I want to believe the animals are rehearsing a scene for a project in which the dog has to act really scared. In which case, bravo! He totally nails it!

If it's not part of rehearsal, let's hope it's a training exercise to teach the big cats that, while it's okay to sneak up and scare dogs, it's never, ever okay to eat them.

(by Jonathan Corbett)

This is the actual sign at Nintendo of America's offices. (via Instagram)

When you gotta go, you gotta go...but where? Since you have the Internet, I'm going to go ahead and assume that you have access to, or at least a passing familiarity with, public toilets. We see the signs that tell us whether bathrooms are for men or women (by the way, calling it the "little boys room" is a lot creepier when you write it down) every day, and most of them aren't worth thinking about. These ones are weird or amusing enough to make us stop and actually notice for once—especially because some of them are intentionally designed to send you into the wrong one.

Apparently, everyone's just supposed to use that pole in the middle. (via reddit)

This might as well just read, "ladies, try next door." (via reddit)

The male rope is well-trimmed. I hear that makes it look longer. (via reddit)

But that makeup kit is how that lady squirrel is gonna get some nuts. (via reddit)

The guy doesn't have an arrow. Is he supposed to go...right here? (via reddit)

OK, so...besides the offensive handicapped sign, the guy is smoking and the woman is wearing a seatbelt in the bathroom. (via reddit)

Can we talk about what this implies is happening in the men's room? (via reddit)

This would be hard to figure out if you'd never been vulgar in your life. (via reddit)

The Women's sign used to have Jean Grey on it; now it's a smoldering pile of ashes. 
(via reddit)

(by Johnny McNulty)

Katy Perry is very disappointed in the behavior you are doing, kids.(via Getty Images)

It's summer in Fargo, North Dakota, but I bet it's feeling downright wintry in the home of Cindy Bjerke, who very publicly went on Facebook to sell her daughter's Katy Perry tickets due to the daughter being a 'spoiled brat' who 'doesn't deserve these tickets.' Bjerke was so upset, she was selling the $110 tickets for $90.

Fargo mom Cindy Bjerke, who's just so fed up dontchaknow.

When asked to elaborate, Bjerke told WDAZ news, "I was not going to give her the tickets... I was not going to let her go to this concert with this behavior that she's been doing." Man, don't you hate it when kids do behavior? This is just the latest in a growing trend of parents shaming their kids on social media, a trend which we have reported on many times. Because it's always awesome.

Bjerke's post resulted in some blowback, however, from people who thought that humiliating her daughter on social media went too far. Said one Fargo parent, Elgie Eagleman, "I think that's a personal issue where it should have been handled privately because on Facebook, everyone's going to see that." Of course, now everyone who's seen the news knows that Ms. Eagleman thinks Bjerke's parenting style is terrible, but that's another story.

Was the daughter's crime changing your Facebook font to this?

To be fair, the post was made on the Fargo/Moorehead Online Garage Sale, which is a closed group that only members can see. Of course, it has 17,757 members in a relatively unpopulated area, so that's pretty public.

For Sale In Fargo: Wood Chipper, Gently Used, Good With People.(via Facebook)

Personally, I have proudly grown up into an adult who hates teenagers, so I don't really care what the behavior was as long as I get to point and laugh at someone during the most impressionable period of their life. Maybe that's because I wasn't shamed enough as a kid.

(by Johnny McNulty)

"That's my jam!"

While it's unclear what this baby was crying about before the music started, there's no denying that this girl loves her some Katy Perry. Before Dark Horse kicks in, it looked like it was shaping up to be an unpleasant ride for whoever was stuck in that car, because this kid was feeling, as Katy might put it, "like a house of cards, one blow from caving in." But as soon as the music starts, it makes her go "Boom, boom, boom! Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon!"

Sorry, I don't know the words to Dark Horse. My backseat crying song is Firework.

While some people would tell you Katy Perry music isn't appropriate for a baby, it has to beat hearing Frozen for the 10,000th time. And it's definitely a better influence than Nine Inch Nails. 

(by Jonathan Corbett)

1. Americans Just Waiting For Go Ahead To Begin National Freak Out Over Ebola Epidemic In Earnest

The second American citizen who has contracted the ebola virus arrived at Emory University Hospital in Atlanta earlier today. Though the 59-year-old infected missionary nurse contracted the deadly disease while working in Africa, now that she has taken it stateside, Americans are waiting in panicked anticipation for the chance to run through the streets screaming in terror.

Ebola is most easily spread through misinformed Facebook posts.

— Sean Brewster (@TheSeanBrewster) August 5, 2014

2. Conan O'Brien To Perform The Greatest Song Ever Written About A Monorail For Simpsons Live Show

Late night host Conan O'Brien has agreed to perform "The Monorail Song" at a series for a live Simpsons revue at the Hollywood Bowl next month. The song comes from the episode "Marge vs. the Monorail," which he penned as a staff writer for the show two decades ago, when only a roomful of people understood how weird his sense of humor was.

my favorite eras of the Simpsons are the Conan years and when the father would try to choke the life from his son

— joewengert (@joewengert) May 31, 2014

3. Science Has Figured Out How To Turn A House Plant Into A Microphone, So There Goes Everything

U.S. citizens' last chance at anything even remotely resembling privacy is on its way out the window now that scientists have figured out how to eavesdrop on people by extracting sound from the minute movements of everyday objects such as house plants and bags of potato chips. The walls now have ears, literally.

News article says "New technology in bars play complex sound waves that turn off younger patrons from entering." Uh yeah, Its called; Jazz.

— Nick Vatterott (@nickvatterott) October 16, 2012

4. Congressional Candidate Disproves Global Warming With Thermometer And A Complete Misunderstanding Of How To Use It

Louisiana congressional candidate Lenar Whitney, who proudly refers to herself the "Palin of the South," claims to have disproved global warming through the use of a "simple scientific device" called a thermometer, as well as an oft-refuted argument. Not for nothing, an analyst for the non-partisan Cook Political Report said that he has never "met any candidate quite as frightening or fact-averse as Louisiana state Rep. Lenar Whitney... It’s tough to decide which party’s worst nightmare she would be. "

You can't argue with science. That is, unless you're an idiot. Then argue away.

— albertina rizzo (@albz) July 30, 2014

5. Baby Annoyingly Covering All The Good Parts In Olivia Wilde's Boob In Empowering Breast-Feeding Photo

Actress Olivia Wilde posed for Glamour magazine while breastfeeding her son Otis Sudeikis. The resulting touching photograph is being hailed as a triumph for mothers everywhere who breastfeed in full make-up and high fashion gowns. 

Olivia Wilde breastfeeds in Glamour: "Now it feels like Otis should always be on my breast." http://t.co/BV90HyEAMSpic.twitter.com/N8xk7GXxLn

— E! Online (@eonline) August 5, 2014

Gonna get Olivia Wilde breast-feeding her baby tattooed on my chest.

— LBJohnson (@ladybirdj) August 5, 2014

(by Dennis DiClaudio)

Take $90,000, leave $90,000. (via)

He might be the only person in America to admit it, but Raymond Burse has enough money. 

Burse is the interim president for Kentucky State University, and when he took on the job again (he was the acting president from 1982-1989 before becoming a 17-year GE exec, and is only back until they find a permanent replacement) he had a meaningful goal in mind: to make sure that the lowest paid employees didn't just receive minimum wage, but a livable wage. 

Right now the minimum wage is $7.25/hr, so to get every employee up to what he heard was a livable $10.25/hr, he found the money in his own paycheck. That's over $90,000 he arranged to have redistributed from his $349,869 annual paycheck.

"My whole thing is I don't need to work," Burse told Lexington Herald-Leader. "This is not a hobby, but in terms of the people who do the hard work and heavy lifting, they are at the lower pay scale."

Burse's salary is now set at $259,745.  

His pay cut is not a poke at other university presidents to follow suit, he said.

"I was in a position where I could do that," he said. "That is not always the case."

And maybe no one should be expecting those in the education sector to be redistributing funds, but that doesn't mean it couldn't, nay, shouldn't, happen elsewhere. I'm looking at you, fat cat CEOs.

Wal-Mart's CEOs make 1,034 times more than the average Wal-Mart employee.

The same study found that for Target, the CEO to worker pay is 597:1, for McDonalds it is 431:1, and for Disney, 557:1. 

Disney! What are you really teaching our kids? So many of their programs include messages of generosity and care for others. What profitable messages those turned out to be.

Burse gave up more than a quarter of his salary so that the people keeping his organization afloat could keep themselves afloat. "This is not a publicity stunt," he said. "You don't give up $90,000 for publicity. I did this for the people. This is something I've been thinking about from the very beginning."

I've been thinking about it too. Isn't this what we've all been thinking the super wealthy should do? Thanks for going first, Raymond Burse. Wanna take a stab at this whole Israel/Palestine thing?

(by Myka Fox)

The North American Shower Hound.

A lot of dogs love water. But not many enjoy it as much as Leena the Rottweiler, who appears to love nothing more than kicking back as her problems are washed away by a hot dose of hydrotherapy.

The best part of the video might be Leena reacting the way most people would if their shower was interrupted by someone with a camera looking to showcase their improv chops for a YouTube video.

MOM: Hellooo? Who's in here? Oh! What are you doing? You taking a shower?

LEENA: (No, I'm knitting a sweater. What does it look like I'm doing?!)

MOM: You taking a shower, Leena? You like this?

LEENA: (Please just go away... Oh great, now Blue is here. I hate this house!)

(by Jonathan Corbett)

We don't quarantine deliciousness, we guarantee it! (via Getty Images)

As many of you might know, New York's Mt Sinai Hospital admitted a patient on Monday who might have the ebola virus.  

While the hospital hasn't released the patient's name or personal information, both to protect the patient's privacy and to keep the the undereducated, overly concerned masses from freaking the fuck out, someone went ahead and made the obligatory Twitter parody account, @MtSinaiEbolaGuy, to keep you informed of his comings and goings around heavily populated NYC.

Heading to @olivegarden for some Alfredo to calm my nerves!

— Mt Sinai Ebola Guy (@MtSinaiEbolaGuy) August 5, 2014 

Who wants to know how many/which trains I took to get to @MountSinaiNYC ?

— Mt Sinai Ebola Guy (@MtSinaiEbolaGuy) August 4, 2014

That isolation chamber the news keeps mentioning is actually a @Starbucks bathroom. #outoforder

— Mt Sinai Ebola Guy (@MtSinaiEbolaGuy) August 5, 2014

Of course, the account is obviously intending to poke fun at all the people using the almost-case of ebola as an excuse to never leave their homes, but Whole Foods is just happy for the patronage , whether or not their customers are carrying a deadly virus that has killed over 800 people in West Africa.

@MtSinaiEbolaGuy You know it's good when there's a line! ;D Thanks for spending your lunch with us!

— Whole Foods Market (@WholeFoods) August 4, 2014

Ya hear that, infected masses? Even when the whole world is logging on to WebMD to make sure their old case of SARS hasn't mutated into Ebola (can that happen?), Whole Foods is happy to share a meal with you, so get your sick butts over there and stand in line for some delicious salad! Don't worry CDC, they've got a sneeze guard.

(by Myka Fox)

Chris Pratt has clearly not forgotten about 'Forgot About Dre.'

Not content with having stolen geeky fanboys' hearts as this generation's Luke Skywalker-by-way-of-Han Solo in the insanely popular sci-fi hit Guardians of the Galaxy, Chris Pratt is going after dorky music snobs' hearts as well. While guesting on DJ Whoo Kid's satellite radio show, The Whoolywood Shuffle, Pratt revealed that, back in the day, he used to "smoke weed every day" while burning the lyrics to Dr. Dre's album 2001 into the folds of his brain. To prove it, he busted out this flawless rendition of Eminem's section of "Forgot About Dre". He's even got that distinctive Marshall Mathers voice down:

In case you're interested, here's the original version. But you really don't need to listen. Pratt's version is pretty much dead on.

(by Dennis DiClaudio)

An 8-bit run. (via)

This is a game-changer! Not only could this revolutionize the tedious, painful monotony that is amateur running, it could create an entirely new avenue for artistic expression. Most importantly, it could help save all of our Facebook feeds from the daily stream of pointless "here's my run!" posts from friends who enjoy nothing more than letting everyone know they're "attacking the day" while the rest of us are reading about dogs taking showers and guys texting their girlfriends while tripping on mushrooms. We get it, you're better than us!

Claire Wyckoff was as bored with running as the rest of us. However, instead of doing the sensible thing and quitting, she decided to get creative, and began using her Nike+ running app to draw pictures.

Her first effort was a crude drawing of a Corgi.

The drawing wasn't very good, but it lit a fire in Claire, who saw the potential in combining athletic achievement with humor. Which, of course, led to dick pics.

Her first attempt came with the brilliantly simple caption, "Today's run was hard." Yes!

The next she called "Gandalf," because "it's long and hooded."

After a failed attempt at drawing George Washington, she returned to her roots to honor Theon Grayjoy.

This brilliant middle finger is called "Fuck Cancer."

After getting requests for more penis, Claire ran out this hairy one "for the fans," who she says "are like jockstraps: mostly white and really supportive."

Bravo. Running is hard, but creating works of art is even harder. You can see more of Claire's drawings on her Instagram page.

(by Jonathan Corbett)

When the rapper Ice Cube dies, they should just kick his body under a huge refrigerator.

I was into being struck by lightning before it was cool. (via)

Seattle resident Robb Montejano was hit by lightning while taking a leisurely walk on Saturday. Later that same day, he posted a video of the exact moment he was struck to YouTube, under the title "I was struck by lightning! What have you done today?" That's a remarkably flippant thing to write just a few hours after experiencing 1.21 gigawatts of electricity coursing through the soft flesh of your body. It's also a tad presumptuous. I mean, am I supposed to feel bad for not getting struck by lightning over the weekend? I accidentally nut-punched myself while trying to open a jar of hot peppers on Friday night. Is that at all comparable?

Anyway, here's the moment it all went down for Montejano, remarkably captured for all time:

And in case you were ever wondering what it feels like to be thunderstruck by Zeus, turns out it's not quite as bad as you might assume: "I just felt this surge of electricity go 'boom' through my body," Montejano told KOMO News. "The electricity flowing through my body. I can't describe it. It was amazing."

Come to think of it, that's not entirely unlike my nut-punch experience. Though I probably wouldn't use the word "amazing."

(by Dennis DiClaudio)

That part isn't actually a joke. That was really Nixon's organization.

This isn't exactly the most historically accurate lesson on Watergate that you can watch, but on this 40th anniversary of the political scandal to end all political scandals, Stephen Colbert hits the truthiness of the situation right on the nose. Of the pandas. Who don't know how to mate.

MMmmm. Space food sticks. What's funny is how barely-exaggerated the ridiculousness of Watergate really was. Even in an era where you can always find out what the next NSA spying revelation will be by listening to what they're denying spying on now, the revelations around Watergate were comically blunt and obvious. There were the Plumbers, the Committee for the Re-Election of the President (C.R.E.E.P), Nixon talking about their hush money, and the 18 1/2 missing minutes of tape. You literally would have to hire comedy writers to make it more absurd. Which, I guess, this proves.

(by Johnny McNulty)

The Lego blue screen of death. (via imgur)

To all you office dwellers who have been thinking of pulling off the ultimate cubicle prank on a co-worker while they are away: you can try to replicate their items with Legos, but you will never get closer than this group did. 

According to her post on reddit, jrazzz12 left for a week's vacation to Alaska, and by the time she returned to her office, well, Legos. 

The computer?

Legoed!  (via imgur)

Phone?

Legoed! (via imgur)

Her jar of peanut butter?

Eh, close enough.... Legoed! (via imgur)

SammyJo42 was one of the masterminds behind the stunt, saying it took forever to pull off, "I'm sad to say that the time spent creating this all came from coming in early, staying late, and on our lunch hours. Worth every minute when she came back and said Hello into the phone. Ma ha ha ha ha." 

I'm pretty sure that's not how phones work, even when they aren't made of Legos.

Why they chose to hit her with this plastic brick prank, they didn't say, but I guess if you are going to be stuck in a cube all day, everything in it might as well be made out of cubes, too. 

(by Myka Fox)

George Clooney, in his rakish-est scarf. (via Getty)

George Clooney certainly is a rascal, isn't he? Tales of the roguish leading man's endearingly profligate prankishness have spread far and wide in the entertainment media. It's pretty much at the point where, if you get within 100 yards of him and do not find yourself the victim of an adorably jaunty prank, you can probably expect Death to call upon you within a fortnight's time.

Anyway, as many people probably don't remember, Clooney actually had a small recurring role on the '90s-era ABC sitcom Roseanne. When that show's eponymous star, Roseanne Barr, was a guest on CBS's The Talk (it's like The View, but less so), she fielded some questions about a particularly scampish prank that the young scoundrel played on his cast-mates. Let's just say that it involves his penis, a pair of Groucho Marx glasses, a camera and the set's refrigerator:

To be completely fair, George Clooney denies ever having put a picture of his penis wearing Groucho glasses on the Roseanne refrigerator. But you've kind of got to deny that, right? For one thing, A-list celebrities can't very well go around telling people about all the borderline-sexual harassment pranks they pull. (What would your mother's friend's sister think?) But more importantly, copping to pranks isn't the rakish way to go.

But, okay, sure, he denies it. Officially, it never happened. But really, what's more likely: that Roseanne Barr is confirming a not-at-all-unbelievable-and-possibly-slanderous story about a former co-worker, or that George Clooney is just as impish as we always assumed he was? Ultimately, that's up to you to decide.

(by Dennis DiClaudio)