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A street artist trolled all of Hollywood with a coke-snorting Oscar statue.

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Whose line is it, anyway?


To be fair to Elvis, he was more of a pills kind of guy. (via @PlasticJesusArt)

Street artist Plastic Jesus put up this amazing statue criticizing Hollywood drug culture right at the intersection of Hollywood Boulevard and La Brea Avenue in Los Angeles, right at the end of the section of the street that will be cordoned off for the Oscars on Sunday. As Plastic Jesus' photographer partner Nick Stern told LAist,

"The piece is intended to draw attention to Hollywood's hidden problem of drug addiction that affects hundreds of people in the showbiz industry and is largely ignored until the death of a high profile A list celebrity."

This is a follow up to last year's statue of a giant standing Oscar with a needle in it's arm (a commentary on the then-recent passing of Philip Seymour Hoffman).


Last year's statue. I guess not everything got solved since then.
(via Plastic Jesus on Instagram)

In light of the sad and untimely death of talented comedian and Parks and Rec producer Harris Wittels at 30, who publicly struggled with heroin and fatally relapsed this week, the criticism couldn't be timelier.

Related: 16 hilarious tweets from the late, great Harris Wittels.


Who would have thought that Ray J would have the best response in the Amber Rose/Khloé Kardashian/Kanye West fight?

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He hit it last, but best.



........
A video posted by rayj (@rayj) on

Ray J, the guy who had sex with Kim Kardashian on tape and made a song about it, was name-checked by Amber Rose in her epic Twitter feud. The flamewar began first with Khloé Kardashian for insulting Khloé's 17-year-old half-sister Kylie Jenner's relationship with 25-year-old rapper Tyga, then with Kanye West for saying Kim Kardashian made him "take 30 showers" to get over his past with Amber. To say that anyone expected him to be the, well, pithiest (despite a lack of any of his actual words) combatant in this squabble would be a vast overstatement. Nevertheless, letting Al Pacino do the talking might be the best thing I've ever seen him do.

For more on the fight:

Part 1: Beginner's guide to caring about a fight between Khloé Kardashian and Amber Rose.

Part 2: Oversharer Kanye says Kim made him take "30 showers" after dating Amber Rose.

Part 3: The celebrity Twitter fight of the century just went nuclear.

Golden statues.

A very self-congratulatory all male feminist support group solves feminism on "Portlandia."

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Is that guy on the right covertly objectifying a woman?

Speaking as a male feminist, I'm a little concerned that this Portlandia sketch—which seems to be mocking the kind of overly enthusiastic male feminist who begins sentences with phrases like "speaking as a male feminist"—might be setting the feminist cause back a decade or so:


It's not that I think that you can't joke about feminism or feminist issues, it's just that I think if you do so, you should do it with as little irreverence as possible. I feel like the level of irreverence in this sketch spikes somewhere in the middle in a manner that, if you graphed it out, would resemble a penis. And that's just too aggressive.

This Great Dane is seriously weirded out by a baby goose.

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"Why is this tiny pillow making such strange noises?"

Instances of enormous dogs getting freaked out by tiny, helpless creatures is probably the best evidence I've come across for a benevolent architect of the universe. I'm surprised that YouTube videos—such as this one, featuring a 14-month-old Great Dane's nerve-wracked reaction to a fluffy, little gosling—don't factor more often into theological debates.

This dog loves the word "treats," hates the word "no."

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It's not hard to figure out how this girl's feeling.

The ears truly are the window to the soul.

Ears go up. Ears go down. Ears go up. Ears go down.

Hopes go up. Hopes go down. Hopes go up. Hopes go down.

Thanks to some clever editing from her dad, this baby girl is the new "Lord of the Dance."

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Kali of the Dance.

This video of a baby performing a traditional Irish-style dance routine is definitely very cute, but I'm 75 percent sure there's some digital fakery that went into it:


Notice how at the 3 second mark you start seeing some very quick edits, and then at 6 seconds you start seeing some split screen effects. Don't feel bad if you were fooled. These kinds of things go right past the untrained eye.

This is actually the exact same kind of trickery they use to make that Michael Flatley guy look like he can dance.

Best Oscar outfit of the night is won by will.i.am's Hamburglar tribute.

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Grimace was wearing YSL.


Who is who?!(via @YahooCelebUK)

Men's fashion is ON POINT tonight. Check out Neil Patrick Harris, host and silver fox:


Sorry, ladies, he's married. (Getty)

Will.i.am is planning a heist for after the awards show, so he's wearing something more versatile than a tux. Maybe we're misinterpreting this look and your burgers are safe? Here's a couple more suggestions popping up on Twitter:


Choo Choo!That's traveling. (via @HuffPostCaStyle)


Announcing the 2015 "Too Good To Watch The Oscars" Awards!

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I'd like to thank all the sheeple watching the Oscars for letting me feel superior tonight.


Who will take home the Golden Smug?

Another year, another barrage of faux-intellectuals, crusaders, and grumps clogging up our feeds and making everyone feel bad for tuning in to one of America's greatest mass distractions. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of reasons to take a stand against the Oscars. If you're a sincere objector, I raise my glass to you in between playing an Oscar drinking game, because you make the world a better place. We all know, however, that most of the people who go online during the Oscars to say they're not watching them are just doing it for attention. This year, let's honor the best of the unbearable poseurs with the first annual Too Good To Watch The Oscars Awards!


Best Imitation Of A Hermit Monk Who Happens To Be On Facebook

"Just a reminder to all my friends on Facebook that Hollywood millionaires congratulating each other does nothing to bring you closer to transcendental bliss, reduce ocean plastic or increase female workforce participation in India. Check out this article I wrote for Thought Catalog about it and please be sure to share!"


Best Confusing Political Attack On A Movie Awards Show

"To everyone mad at Scott Walker for saying he's "not sure" if Obummer loves America or is Christian—I know that anyone watching the Oscars hates America and our troops!!!!! #blessed #AmericanSniper


Best Obvious "Live-Tweeting Not Watching The Oscars" Joke

It's a four-way tie!

"There isn't a Puppy Oscars on Animal Planet, so I'm just giving awards to my stuffed animals instead!" - @GenericSadComedian

"Why's everyone talking about Neil Patrick Harris? OMG ARE YOU ALL WATCHING DOOGIE HOWSER RERUNS, TOO?" - @ClevvverDoucheBouche

"If I wanted to watch overpaid white people get applause, I'd re-watch the Two and a Half Men finale. Which I am. #Anarchy" - @SNARKASM3000ANDFIVE

"Not watching the Oscars but according to Twitter, either Gone Girl just won or Neil Patrick Harris did a duet with Ben Affleck's penis." - @HEYOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


Best Unconvincing Boycott Member

"I'm not watching an all-white awards show! Tonight I'm finally watching 12 Years In Selma." - Jane D'oh, Facebook, 5pm this afternoon.


Best Embrace Of The Wrong Boycott

"#LegoFilmsMatter! Yes the villain was Lord Business, but every character was a corporate mascot. Corps are ppl, too!" - John R. Publican, Facebook, 1/15/15.


Best Complete Dismissal Of A Coworker's Opinions

Steve Stephenson, Chase Bank Branch Millburn, NJ - "Oh please. Saying the The Imitation Game teaches people math is like saying a kids' menu maze teaches people about geography."


Best Supporting Dismissal Of A Coworker's Opinions

Brad Kovacs, Chase Bank Branch Millburn, NJ - "Yeah, Carol, you dumbass."


Best Making-It-About-Your Drama

"MY HUSBAND AND I WATCHED THE OSCARS EVERY YEAR AND NOW WE'RE DIVORCED. ALL OF YOUR TWEETS ARE LIKE ICICLES IN MY EYEBALLS."


Best Humblebrag Excuse

"Man, I really wish I was watching the Oscars. Too bad I have to work tonight." - Neil Patrick Harris


Melanie Griffith hasn't aged in fifteen years, but Dakota has.

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Because she grew up, duh.


She knows what looks good, too. Black. Dress. (via @SraHistorias)

Melanie Griffith is burning up the red carpet.

Her daughter is lovely but didn't really get exciting until she made Ryan Seacrest repeat the word 'flogger' over and over on camera:


All while viewers at home spanked each other and tittered. Pan back to Ms. Griffith, please.

Lupita Nyong'o says what we're all hoping for with #TheActorGoesTo.

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Not everyone can be a winner.


But she's smiling about it.(via Getty)

Lupita Nyong'o is a woman of immense poise, talent and beauty. That said, she is the first flub of the evening and it was a hilarious. Giving away the award for best actor in a supporting role, Ms. Nyong'o went with, "The actor goes to," instead of the more traditional, "The Oscar goes to."

Incredible Freudian slip. Let's all get dreamy about who WE'D like to take home. Frankly, it's an honor just to be nominated.


Right, Anna Faris' husband?(via Getty)

Here's the Oscars opening number, complete with Jack Black, Anna Kendrick and the "whitest" joke.

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Already Nominated For A Tony

Neil Patrick Harris is no stranger to hosting, and that was quickly apparent with an entertaining opening number. His monologue also addressed the #OscarsSoWhite controversy right at the top of the evening, which not many expected. Obviously, NPH's multiple stints as Tony host lent to some jokes about its Broadway quality, but mostly it turned most of Twitter's snark into begrudging sincere enjoyment.

Easy win.

Patricia Arquette wins Academy Award and incites a lady riot.

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And the crowd goes wild!

Patricia Arquette just got political with her Oscar acceptance speech, thanking women everywhere for producing every single taxpaying citizen in America. Then she called for equal pay and equal rights for women. Meryl Streep went nuts.

Not everyone was enthusiastic about the serious message in her words:

Earlier it was rumored Ms. Arquette was a little tipsy on the red carpet. We can see why now: liquid courage.

Before John Travolta even spoke tonight, he already had the two most viral moments of the #Oscars.

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Does John Travolta think Scarlett Johansson is Adele Dazeem?

John Travolta's been getting knocked around since flubbing Idina Menzel's name a year ago, and there were jokes abounding even before the two of them came onstage and did an awkward bit about it. Before that, however, he was getting circulated around the Internet as a meme creeping on Benedict Cumberbatch. And way back on the red carpet, this happened::


"You don't know me like that." (via @SFGate)

This is not what enthusiastic consent looks like, Mr. Travolta. Scarlett looks like a mannequin inhabited by an angry spirit, unable to move or object in daylight...but at night. At night she COMES ALIVE.


Getting ahead.

For some reason Lady Gaga's amazing "Sound of Music" tribute last night shocked everyone.

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Talented lady is talented.


It turns out that underneath all the costumes and special effects, Lady Gaga is just a very talented performer who can sing good. Which we already knew, but there's still something a little exciting and incongruous about imagining her in the role of Maria, instead of, say Carrie Underwood (sorry, Carrie Underwood! We know, you thought that was behind you).

In honor of the 50th anniversary of The Sound of Music, Gaga sang a medley of "The Sound of Music," "My Favorite Things," "Edelweiss" and "Climb Ev'ry Mountain." It was a stirring performance, and most importantly, no one went home with the song "Paparazzi" stuck in their head.

Best actor.

Scarlett Johansson debuted her new Kim Jong-un haircut last night.

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He can't help being a trendsetter, because everyone has to do what he says.


(Getty/@frankfeinstein)

Turns out Kim Jong-un's power extends far beyond North Korea.

The dictator just got a new look—complete with trapezoidal hairdo and sawed-off eyebrows—and Scarlett Johansson rushed to sport the cut to the Oscars last night. So fashion-forward of her. We predict by the end of the month, middle school girls all over the country will be clamoring to get "The Kim Jong-un."

You look great, ScarJo! Very ruthless!

Equal right.

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