Kristen Wiig is returning to the SNL stage this week to host the episode that airs on November 19th. Kristen may have been away from the topical sketch comedy scene for a while, but she clearly still knows what the kids are into these days. In a promo for the episode she's hosting, Wiig joined the current SNL cast in an epic behind-the-scenes Mannequin Challenge. I think it's the best one I've seen so far (well, except for these tiny children who can't stand still).

As per usual, Leslie Jones is an absolute treasure. I am a little disappointed, though, that Kristen wasn't in costume as Gilly or the Target Lady or Sue or one of her other iconic characters. I'm sure at least one of them will make an appearance on Saturday night, though.

Today, a truly astounding report from Bloomberg detailed how China's Vice Foreign Minister had to explicitly deny the preposterous claim that China started the idea of global warming as a hoax. Of course, they had to do so because President-elect Donald Trump once tweeted the following:

Say what you will about the man, it is honesty impressive that he never deleted that tweet.

A Chinese official, Minister Liu Zhenmin, reportedly responded at United Nations global warming talks on Wednesday: "If you look at the history of climate change negotiations, actually it was initiated by the IPCC with the support of the Republicans during the Reagan and senior Bush administration during the late 1980s."

According to The Verge, he's referring to a climate change panel created by the United Nations to investigate what we now call global warming. He's saying China didn't start those negotiations, so there's no reason to think China created global warming as a hoax to—you know what, no, there's no reason to explain this. China did not start global warming as a hoax.

Zhenmin may as well have said: "Yo, we didn't create climate change, what the actual f***?"

Oh, and all this is going down at a conference in Morocco, where representatives from around the world have gathered to "decide on the finer points" of the historic Paris agreement to fight climate change.

What a time to be alive, right?

Kendall Jenner made waves on the internet on Sunday when she abruptly deleted her Instagram account. "Why Kendall, why?!" the world cried, "Why must you delete your Instagram at a time when we desperately need distractions from this onslaught of political madness?!" Well, the world got its answer on Wednesday, when Kendall revealed the reason behind her Instagram blackout on Ellen.

Jenner revealed that the reason behind her sudden departure was simply a need to go off the grid for a few days. “I just wanted to detox. I felt like I just wanted a little bit of a break. I’m always on it. … I would wake up in the morning and I would look at it first thing, I would go to bed and it was the last thing I would look at,” Jenner told Ellen. "I felt a little too dependent on it, so I kinda wanted to take a minute to detox."

Kendall says she was surprised that her deleting her Instagram ended up being a big news story.

“My friends kept texting me and my family members, and I was like, How does everyone know? And they kept sending me links to, like, CNN and all these things and I was like, Why is this even that big of a deal?” she said. "It's so crazy."

"But Kendall! Will your fun pics ever return?!" you ask. Well, she answered that question too.

“I’ll be back. I’ll come back. It’s been two days! Withdrawals are starting to occur,” she said.

See guys? No reason to freak out.

Happy Hump Day! You made it over the hump! It's almost the weekend, and after the weekend comes a short week for Thanksgiving, so relax, it's basically Thanksgiving!

Unless that stresses you out. If you're stressed about Thanksgiving, pssssssh, you've got LOTS of time.

Here's what you missed while you were climbing over the hump.

1. Trump said global warming was made up by the Chinese. The Chinese confirmed that that was made up.

One of President-Elect DJT's many, many conspiracy theories is that climate change was a hoax meant to affect the market. But the truth is, it's real, and it's going to ruin the world unless he does first.

A Chinese minister made a point to point out that it's real, and even Republicans' idol Ronald Reagan acknowledged its existence.

2. Glow-in-the-dark hair is the hot new way to piss people off in the movie theater.

You've seen hidden rainbow hair, unicorn hair, and now, meet glow-in-the dark hair. See more beautiful/obnoxious styles of it here.

3. A woman's dress came with a free dead rat and now she's suing.

Apparently a hidden dead rat is not a desired accessory this season. When a woman named Carly Fiesel bought a dress at Zara in Greenwich, Connecticut, there was a hidden vermin sewn beneath the seams. Now she's suing for emotional distress and a rash apparently caused by rodent-borne disease. Eek.

4. Tom Hanks wants to make America feel great again.

America's dad Tom Hanks forwent a usual acceptance speech for an honor at the MoMA in favor of something more timely. No, not revealing the secrets behind the mysterious David S. Pumpkins, but trying to instill hope with a little help from Schoolhouse Rock!

5. A guy's paranoid analysis of a sext proved him right.

A guy was enjoying some generous sexty sexts he got from his girlfriend when she was away in Atlanta, but discovered a hidden suitcase that turned out to be a smoking gun.

Next time, don't cheat—or do better hiding the evidence.

6. The Internet is helping a dad find a blue sippy cup for his autistic son.

The internet is not such a bad place after all, especially when it's harnessed to help. A dad named Marc Carter in Devon, England rallied Twitter to help him get a particular blue cup, the only cup his autistic son Ben would drink from.

Soon #CupForBen was being tweeted alongside Joe Biden memes, as people are helping the family make sure Ben stays happy and hydrated.

7. Here's Ricky Martin's hot fiancé.

Enjoy. You deserve it.

Maybe this incredible story about human kindness and the power of social media will convince you that not everything is terrible. Marc Carter, a 42-year-old father of three from Devon, England, launched a global search on Twitter for a light blue Tommee Tippee cup that could save his son's life. Carter's 13-year-old son, Ben, has autism, and this specific cup is the only thing he will drink out of.

Carter told People his son “would rather die” than drink out of any other cup, and has been hospitalized several times for dehydration. Unfortunately, the original model is no longer sold, and the one he has is getting worn down. So two days ago, the desperate dad shared this plea for help on Twitter:

Then, Twitter took a break from making (hilarious!) Joe Biden memes and rallied to help. In the past two days, his tweets have been shared over 20,000 times, and people across the world spread the word about the cup, which looks like this:

Tommee Tippee, the UK-based company that made the original cup, also jumped in to help, sharing the story on Twitter and Facebook:

The story has since been picked up by news sources all over the world.

And Carter is so grateful for all the support, he's not even grumpy anymore:

Today, he tweeted out an update to thank people for their support and reassure them that Ben will be okay:

And more good news! Carter told People he currently has ten cups being mailed to him from all over the globe. He hopes to eventually gather a lifelong supply. “The chances of Ben ever using a normal cup are minimal. Maybe he never will,” said Carter. “I’d like to have enough cups to last me a lifetime.”

Do you have a replica of the same light blue Tommee Tippee sippy cup? Here's what you can do:

“It’s amazing that so many people have replied — really sweet,” Carter told People.“Everyone has been a bit down recently because of what’s going on in the world, so it’s just nice to know there so many kind people out there."

Wait, is something going on in the world? What did I miss?

Call me traditional, but I believe a wedding ring belongs on a finger. And now there's medical data to back this up. A 28-year-old South African man experienced a rare case of “penile strangulation” after putting his wedding ring on—can you guess?—his penis.

According to the South African Medical Journal,the man, who for some reason wished to remain anonymous, was attempting to use the wedding ring to enhance sexual pleasure, in place of a sex toy.

But here's the thing, a wedding ring is not a sex toy. Apparently, the ring caused the man’s penis to swell up so much that he couldn't remove it, and his mother (!!!!!!) had to take him to a nearby hospital.

At first, doctors tried to cut the ring off with a tiny surgical saw, but this didn't work for reasons relating to using a saw very close to a man's penis. So instead, the doctors were eventually able to reduce the swelling using a syringe and a pink needle. Fortunately, the patient is recovering from the minor surgery, but we can not confirm whether he is recovering from that ride to the hospital with his mom.

That might be an even worse kind of pain.

The case report, which is helpfully titled "Successful removal of a penile constriction wedding ring in a rural area," also notes that if this should this happen to you:

“No proper guidelines exist for the treatment of this condition, so the ‘best method’ is the one with a successful outcome.”

So next time someone you or someone you know gets a ring stuck on their penis, please pass along this information. But also, never, ever, ever do that.

If there's one thing for certain about good-looking people Brian Austin Green and wife Megan Fox it's that they have produced some pretty adorable kids. On Wednesday day, Green posted a few pictures of his kids on Instagram, including new baby Journey River Green, born August 4.

He captioned the picture, "My wife makes beautiful babies," which is completely true. The couple had been planning on getting divorced last year, but Fox's pregnancy apparently made her rethink things, and a source told Us Weekly in June that the couple was "totally back together."

Green posted photos of the couple's other two children, Noah, 3, and Bodhi, 2, captioning one of them, "I miss being young." Yeah, you and everyone else, Brian.

He also posted a picture of Noah, writing, "Crazy how good looking he is." Good looking, absolutely, crazy, not so much, because this couple clearly has amazing genes.

President-elect Donald Trump ditched his press pool Tuesday night and was filmed at expensive Manhattan steakhouse 21 Club with his family, promising the other rich diners, "We'll get your taxes down—don't worry about it." This will probably not be welcome news to all the Americans who voted for him based on his vows that he'd focus on the middle class.

In a 41 second video posted to Twitter, Trump is seen shaking hands with people at the restaurant, while in the background a reporter asks him, "No heads up for the media?"

It turns out Trump had slipped out of Trump Tower after a campaign member told the media he was in for the night. Instead, he met his wife Melania, daughters Tiffany and Ivanka, and son-in-law Jared Kushner, at the steakhouse for a burger and fries.

The Trump team is currently undergoing a transition that he characterized as "organized" but which, by all press accounts, is actually anything but (surprise!).

Shelley Duvall, most famous for portraying Wendy Torrance in The Shining and Olive Oyl in Popeye, has been out of the public eye for years now. On Friday, The Dr. Phil Showwill air footage of Duvall sitting down with the TV personality to discuss her mental health, and she sadly seems very, very unwell.

Duvall's mental health issues are not at all funny, and it is doubtful that an interview with Dr. Phil will do anything besides turn her struggle into a spectacle. Additionally, Dr. Phil is about as effective of a doctor as Tony the Tiger, and it is likely that he met with Duvall to bolster ratings—not because he wanted to help her. At best, we can hope that the publicity will garner the attention of actual mental health experts who can guide her on a path to wellness.

After her fiancé, Justin Verlander, lost the Cy Young Award to Rick Porcello (note: this is a professional baseball thing/award for the best pitcher in the league), supermodel Kate Upton had some pretty sexual fury for any baseball writers who left her husband-to-be off their ballots.

That sound you hear is millions of teenage boys practicing baseball again.

The rest of her rant was full of fury and absent sex, which is fine! But no one (men) could really get past the first thing.

Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher are expecting their second child together, and although they have not revealed what the baby's name is going to be, Kutcher did reveal what the name isn't going to be. Kutcher sat down with Conan O'Brien to talk about the name he picked out for their son-to-be that Kunis rejected.

Hm. Hawkeye Kutcher. Really, that is no worse than"Apple" or "Pilot Inspektor." Isn't it pretty much Hollywood protocol to name your kid something wacky at this point?

However, if they did go with the unconventional name, that kid would have to deal with Jeremy Renner jokes for forever. Traumatizing.

In what is the least metal but most charming thing Metallica has ever done, the band performed their song "Enter Sandman" on toy instruments with Jimmy Fallon and house band The Roots on Wednesday's Tonight Show.

While Fallon and The Roots all paid homage to the band by wearing Metallica shirts, Metallica members James Hetfield (vocals and guitar IRL, toy clarinet in this video) and Lars Ulrich (drums IRL and in the video) wore Tonight Show and Roots shirt, respectively (Metallica's two other band members, lead guitarist Kirk Hammett and bass player Robert Trujillo, were also there).

The band is currently promoting their tenth album, Hardwired … to Self-Destruct. They started releasing videos for the album tracks at noon on Wednesday, posting new ones to their site every 2 hours. Currently there are 13 videos, which you can check out on their website.

A woman at a sushi restaurant had the pleasure of sitting nearby a gentleman just bursting with a condescending, men's rights, just-came-back-from-study-abroad attitude... and his date.

Oh, what a delightful world! Where we can all eavesdrop together via Twitter. Meet our characters: Pompous Idiot, Girl He's Humiliating, and Narrator.

You'll find out soon enough that this is not, in fact, their first date. Which makes this whole thing even crazier, because this guy is apparently capable of making a relationship last longer than one dinner.

You'll see.

This guy is both an expert and incapable of making decisions at the same time. Beautiful.

For reference: giant clams are 4 feet long and over 500 pounds.

WHAT WAS HE PROMOTING?

Confirmed.

Welp.

And what a journey it was.

The future libraries of the world will be full of live-tweeted dating misadventures. It's the world's fastest growing literary genre.

Two North Carolina parents who appeared on Extreme Makeover: Home Edition are accused of ditching their adopted kids soon after the cameras stopped rolling. WSOC TV reports now that two of the kids are no longer minors, they're speaking out.

Parents Devonda and James Friday pitched an emotional plea to the ABC reality show that they needed more room for their five foster children, as well as a new storefront for their nonprofit.

Enter Oprah's friend Ty Pennington, who along with volunteers and his crew, flipped their house into a dream mansion.

The five adopted children are biological siblings, and even changed their last name to Friday. But within a year of the episode wrapping, they say none of them were living in the mansion with Mr. and Mrs. Friday.

"What they did to us was just wrong. (They) threw us all out," Chris Friday told WSOC. He was sent to a group home because of a "bad attitude" within months of the recording, but was told it was temporary. Kamaya Friday was sent to a different group home months later for the same reason.

"My brother and sisters were 5-years-old. How can they get that much trouble where they have to kick them out?" Chris said.

Kamaya and Chris now suggest that their adoptive parents were only after one thing: the money.

Devonda and James received thousands of dollars worth of goods for their nonprofit store, including Sears gift cards, and Kamaya accuses her of using the money on herself.

Chris claimed that Devonda drove a mini-van before the show, and quickly upgraded to a Mercedes-Benz convertible.

When the WSOC crew arrived at the mansion, Devonda backed up her Mercedes and drove away.

The family went to court in 2015, but Kamaya and Chris still didn't trust their adoptive parents' motivations.

"They went to court trying to get us all back, but I think it was about the money, too," Chris explained.

"The judge he gets upset and is like, ‘You leave these kids life for a whole year, then try to come back a year later and say you want them back. It doesn't work like that,’" Kamaya added.

The grown children say that they're moving on with their lives and changing their last name, but the younger three children are split in different homes.

Sweden is ahead of us in many ways: universal healthcare, shorter work weeks, meatballs. Now it seems like Sweden is also leading the fight against mansplaining. According to the New York Times, a Swedish union has sent up a hotline where employees can report incidents of mansplaining at their jobs. It's part of a weeklong effort to raise awareness of the condescending way certain men explain things to women that they already know.

The hotline was set up by Unionen, a trade union that represents roughly 600,000 private-sector workers in Sweden. The line is open from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. every day this week, and both men and women are being encouraged to call in with their stories. Their calls will be answered by 20 gender experts (both men and women).

"Our objective is to contribute to awareness and start a discussion which we hope will be the first step in changing the way we treat each other and talk about each other in the workplace," union spokeswoman Jennie Zetterström told the Times.

Zetterström said that many people have called the hotline asking for advice on what to do when they feel like they're being run over by male colleagues or on how to help female colleagues when they're being ignored by men.

Unsurprisingly, there have been mixed reactions to this. Since news of the hotline broke, Unionen's Facebook page has been flooded with negative comments from certain men who are Very Mad!™ (Probably the same men who might benefit from learning about mansplaining.)

Zetterström said that it was never the union's intention to "point fingers or blame all men," just to raise awareness of gender discrimination in the workplace and start discussions that might help to stop it.

Any chance they're taking international calls?

Adele saw a bat while performing in Mexico City, and she could not have handled it in a more hilarious or adorable way.

Is she happy? Scared? Who knows. What we do know is that a full-grown woman in a sparkly gown just flapped her arms and ran around stage screaming "There's a bat!" in front of thousands of people. Then it would seem that she went right back to doing her thing. And that's why she is the best.

Yep, the same woman who made you sob into your pillow after listening to her music is just a big ol' goof deep down. Never change, Adele.