On Saturday night President-elect Donald Trump took to Twitter to once again express his disdain for the sketch comedy show Saturday Night Live. And while the rest of us collectively groaned and went about our days, one woman decided to finally take Trump to task in a Twitter rant for the ages.

Danielle Muscato is a self-described "activist, pundit, writer, debater, and public speaker," and according to her professional Facebook page has been quoted or mentioned in well-known publications like The New York Times, Time magazine and Rolling Stone. That is to say, Muscato knows her speaking points and she was ready to have at it.

And that's just the first of dozens of tweets. The entire rant is pretty inspiring. As a black trans woman, Muscato belongs to minority groups that currently live in fear of the damaging laws that could be passed under Trump and his increasingly terrifying cabinet picks, as well as the hateful rhetoric Trump's victory has fueled in his followers. Muscato's takedown of Trump is a reminder to the media as well as all citizens that there are ways for all of us to refuse normalizing his behavior.

Get angry and uplifted all at once by reading the whole rant below.

After months of protest in increasingly harsh conditions and under an international spotlight, the Standing Rock Sioux and their allies appear to have scored a major success: The Army Corps of Engineers has said it will deny the current route for the unbuilt portion of the Dakota Access Pipeline and conduct a study about the environmental impact of several alternate paths.

"I am thankful there were some leaders in the federal government that realized something was not right even though it's legal," said Standing Rock Sioux Chairman David Archambault in announcing the news. "For the first time in history... they heard our voices. This is something that will go down in history and is a blessing for all indigenous people. I heard the Army Corps of Engineers will not grant the easement and they will reroute."

While some have been cautious in celebrating the decision, saying it may only amount to a delay, the news comes the day before the deadline federal officials had given protesters who were blocking construction to vacate the North Dakota site. Previously, activists had braved water cannons fired at them in freezing temperatures by police, as well as attack dogs and mace.

The Sioux have said that existing route for the nearly completed 1,172-mile underground oil pipeline, which goes through Lake Oahe, threatens their drinking water and sacred burial sites. Politicians, celebrities, and ordinary citizens have joined and donated to their cause as they have tried to halt the $3.8 billion project with peaceful demonstrations. The pipeline was previously rerouted away from the city of Bismarck without any such activity on the part of the local populace—though many residents later stood with Standing Rock.

Pop star The Weeknd used to have a very notable haircut. It kind of looked like he had antlers that deflated on him.

But then, back in September, he did something most of us do fairly regularly without fanfare: he cut his hair. Maybe he was simply bored of the style (happens to me all the time). Or maybe he was tired of white women petting him without asking permission. People did not know and it was simply driving them wild.

Well, Abel Tesfaye finally explained why he decided to cut his hair to DJ Zane Lowe on Beats 1 last week. The reason, which you can read in full below, is because his dreadlocks were sad, and also because he missed hats.

"The vision wasn’t there anymore. It was there and then just like the music, it was getting really sad. It was the greatest feeling of all time [cutting it off]. It was so good. I could sleep better, I felt lighter, and when I perform, I perform better and feel better, it’s cool. The best part about all of it, I get to wear f*cking hats again. Wear a f*cking cap and walk into a restaurant and nobody knows it’s you, it’s the greatest feeling."

If you're thinking to yourself that this feels kind of contrary to everything that The Weeknd claimed he stood for previously, well, you're not wrong. In an interview with Rolling Stone in October 2015 he said of his locks, "but if I cut it, I'd look like everyone else. And that's just so boring to me."

I'm just here to let The Weeknd know that I don't think he needs to let his hair define him. His music should do that. But I do think his music is kind of boring.

After five agonizing days, Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher have finally revealed their newborn son's name.

According to People, the couple named their second child Dimitri Portwood Kutcher. Dimitri is a popular name in Kunis' home country of Ukraine, and the baby's middle name appears to be in honor of Kutcher's stepfather, Mark Portwood. Baby Dimitri was born on November 30th at 1:21 a.m.

Dimitri is definitely better than "Hawkeye," the name Kutcher originally advocated because its the University of Iowa mascot. Mila swiftly shut that suggestion down, but what Kutcher calls his son when his wife is not around is totally up to him.

Dimitri is younger brother to sister Wyatt, who was born to Kunis and Kutcher in 2014.

Despite saying he wouldn't take a position in Donald Trump's White House cabinet due to his lack of government experience, Ben Carson has been named the new Secretary of Housing and Urban Development (HUD). As a creationist, Carson probably believes cities are built by god, not humans, but I'm sure it's fine. Here's what funny people on Twitter think about Trump's latest pick.

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Sometimes Youtuber and always mom Amanda Bell found herself infuriated during a holiday shopping run at Khol's, so she did what anyone would do in that situation. She channeled her fury at an incompetent line holder-upper into a fun Snapchat video.

It works because Bell has a really, really excellent command of Snapchat filters. And a really, really angry take on anyone who spends too much time in line.

"Sooo... making this return, do I lose all my Kohl's cash...? Or just like, some of my Kohl's cash," asks Bell, impersonating a slow shopper while her face contorts into that of a square doofus'.

"Do you not realize that I have to go pick up my kids in like 15 minutes?" she asks, as a deer.

The video has nearly 4 million views since being posted on November 30, but of course not everyone appreciated her impersonations.

"You're really going to questions whether the lady in front of you knows that you have to p/u your kids?" asked one commenter, not really getting it.

Look, we all think we're the only person in the world while we're shopping. It's not a huge deal. Just hurry up.

The Dakota Access Pipeline protesters got wonderful news on Sunday, when the Army Corps of Engineers announced that they will deny the permit for construction of the controversial pipeline to continue. The win might be temporary, as President-elect Donald Trump has said that he supports the project, but for now, there's reason to rejoice. Here's what the celebrities who were involved in and passionate about the cause had to say.

1. Katy Perry

2. Mark Ruffalo

3. Rose McGowan

4. Solange

5. Pharrell Williams

6. Michael Moore

7. Susan Sarandon

8. Alyssa Milano

9. Sally Field

10. Sophia Bush

11. Billy Eichner

Before becoming ridiculously rich and famous, Chris Pratt was just another stereotypical wannabe actor in Los Angeles who paid the bills by waiting tables. Pratt told Graham Norton about his time as a waiter at a failing Beverly Hills restaurant, and the innovative way he kept from starving: by eating his customer's leftover scraps. Gross, but true.

Wow, Chris Pratt literally went from eating other people's garbage to starring in multiple blockbuster franchises. Now waiters probably eat his unwanted leftovers! Inspiring.

If Santa could use reindeer to deliver gifts around the world in a night, Domino's Pizza in Japan was hoping to employ the magical moose to help deliver pies in 40 minutes or less.

But after some training snafus, Domino's won't be playing reindeer games after all.

The chain announced that they are giving up on their own Prancers, Dancers, and Vixens because the reindeer turned out to be"difficult to control." A video shows Domino's staff in Hokkaido trying to train the reindeer through a course, knocking pizzas over and running away from the staff.

In their statement, Domino's said that the reindeer got scared and ran away when they heard dogs barking, which made approaching customer's homes nearly impossible.

To try and keep up the holiday cheer, Domino's will convert scooters to look like reindeers. Hopefully the scooters are not afraid of dogs.

I guess Domino's couldn't find a red-nosed reindeer to keep the deliveries oncourse.

A funny email exchange posted on Reddit shows just how useless the security cameras installed in front of buildings sometimes are. Redditor omarchakir's brother's bike was stolen from in front of the building where he lives, so his brother wrote to the building manager, asking if he could look at the building's security camera footage. The response he received was slightly less than satisfactory.

In answer to his initial request to view the footage, the man's building manager wrote,

The cameras are dummy cameras and not real, they are incapable of recording and are only there as a deterrent.

Well, as a deterrent, the cameras are clearly not working well.

So, in replying to the building manager, the man offered up some other useful ideas for the building to look into adopting.

His response reads,

Thank you for clarifying what a dummy camera is.

Please let me know if the lock on the door to the building is also a dummy and only there as a deterrent. At which point I might as well place a blow up doll in the entrance and we can all call it a security guard.

There you go, problem solved!

5. Taylor Swift, because Hailey Baldwin threw shade at the Squad.

Like all secret societies with unlimited power, Taylor Swift's squad has always been the subject of suspicion and prejudice. Celebrities who weren't chosen for squad status have often criticized it—from Katy Perry to Demi Lovato to Kendall Jenner. And now we can add another name to the Anti-Squad Squad: Hailey Baldwin.

In a new interview with Australia's Yahoo 7 Be, the 20-year-old model (and daughter of Stephen, the bad boy Baldwin brother) said that she doesn't get what the squad, or its hype, are about:

I don't know what having a squad means. I just have my friends and that's it. I don't think that you need to create a public squad. I don't know what that proves. So I don't really understand the Taylor Swift squad at all.

She actually raises some deep questions about the nature of friendship, fame, and squads. Does Swift really have a "public squad," or is she just so famous that her friends become associated with her automatically? They're certainly active on social media, but who in their generation isn't? And is Baldwin throwing shade, or is she just genuinely confused?

I'm definitely confused. I'd need my own squad to help me figure this out.

4. Justin Bieber, because he's single.

I know what you're saying—"But I'm single! How come that millionaire Bieber is having a worse Monday than me?" First of all, stop whining. And second, remember that he's a world-famous pop star. For him (and his large penis) to be single is a crime against nature. And what's worse, it turns out he's not even looking for his next girlfriend. If Bieber has truly given up on love, then we're all in big trouble.

And yet it seems that he has. In an interview with his BFF Ellen Degeneres on Monday, Bieber said:

I am not dating anybody. Single. I'm not really looking either.

That kind of terse language can only mean that the 22-year-old singer is totally jaded about romance. It's heartbreaking to think that only this past summer, he was pursuing a new relationship with model Sofia Richie, while simultaneously stirring up old drama with his on-again-off-again ex Selena Gomez.

Biebs even told Ellen that he has never used Tinder or any other dating apps. Which is less surprising, because he's Justin Bieber. If he suddenly showed up on Tinder, there would be chaos in the streets.

3. Fidel Castro, because his Jeep broke down on the way to his funeral.

For former Cuban dictator Fidel Castro, things couldn't get any worse. First of all, he's dead. But even in death, the limitations he placed on the country he ruled for 50 years are still making him look bad.

On Sunday, the vintage Jeep carrying Castro's ashes broke down during a procession in Santiago de Cuba. Soldiers had to literally get out and push, which has to be embarrassing for the 90-year-old Castro, who died on November 25.

Because of the longstanding US embargo against Cuba, most of the country's vehicles are vintage, and tend to break down frequently. But you'd think that they could have found something a little more reliable for the president's funeral. Like a donkey, maybe?

2. The Grinch who burned Christmas to the ground.

A grisly scene out of one of Dr. Seuss's darkest nightmares played out last week along a highway in Huntsville, Alabama. A float bound for the local Christmas parade caught fire after a passing motorist carelessly flicked a cigarette butt at it. Soon, passersby were treated to the horrific sight of Whoville from How the Grinch Stole Christmas burning in a fiery inferno.

Whatever tiny-hearted monster is responsible for destroying this festive work of art was not brought to justice, but they will have to live with the guilt of their actions forever (or at least until they repent by carving up a Roast Beast).

The float was handmade by members of the Lost and Found Pets of Huntsville/Madison County Facebook group. They've started a gofundme campaign to recoup their losses and rebuild the float. If we all donate, maybe they'll collect enough money to make it flame retardant this time.

1. Two guys who tried to rob a convenience store with their rooster.

Ben Franklin once said, "Three may keep a secret, if two are dead." But what if one of them is a rooster? As it turns out, they can't keep their beaks shut either.

Police in Northampton, MA responded to a report of a robbery in progress at a local convenience store around 3:45 AM on Sunday. Investigating the area, they found two men in a nearby car, along with a rooster. Their suspicions aroused, they searched the car and found stolen merchandise from the store. The men were arrested, and the rooster was brought to the station for safekeeping.

Officers posted about the incident, and their "very vocal guest," on their Facebook page.

So far, no information has been released about why the crooks were in possession of a rooster. But we can speculate. Maybe the rooster was a lookout, intended to crow loudly from the car to alert them if the police arrived (or if the sun came up).

Or maybe the rooster was the mastermind, and he planned the whole job. He could even have allowed his accomplices to be caught, knowing that no cop would suspect an "innocent" bird. It's genius. Even if he was found out, he could just fly the coop.

Channing Tatum and his wife Jenna Dewan-Tatum have been together ever since they fell in love on the set of Step Up ten years ago. (Ah, Step Up,the choice viewing for every mid-2000s slumber party.) We already know they love gushing about each other on social media, so obviously, when Jenna celebrated her 36th birthday over the weekend, Channing made sure to give her an Instagram tribute worthy of a queen.

It's pretty sweet. Almost too sweet. Not sure if you still believe in love? You will when you see these two.

He captioned the photo:

I'm not sure if this woman is my Rainbow or my pot of gold but I'm lucky either way happy birthday cake baby!

Ugh. I want to hate it, but it's too adorable. Two (extremely attractive) people in love. Using rainbow metaphors to describe their love. My cold grinchy heart has been warmed.

Jenna later posted an Instagram to thank everyone who had wished her a happy birthday.

She wrote:

Kisses for all of you!! THANK YOU for my happy birthday wishes!!!! I can't possibly thank you all individually, but please know I love you all and words can't explain how grateful I am for your love and support always

We're sure Channing got his kiss in person.

Madonna talked Trump, kissed Ariana Grande, and got frisky with ex-husband Sean Penn at a fundraising concert to benefit Raising Malawi, a foundation that helps African children. Yeah, a lot was going on there. Here's what went down.

Between singing and selling her possessions at the auction/concert, Madonna took every opportunity she could to slam the President-elect. The staunch Democrat sang "Toxic" by Britney Spears as images of the 45th President played behind her. She also recalled the time she slept in Donald Trump's bed, but don't worry— she didn't bonk The Donald.

Now don’t go jumping to conclusions because he wasn't in that bed. He wasn't anywhere near that bed. He wasn’t even in the room. I was just doing a photo shoot in Palm Beach for the Versace campaign in his house. I just want to mention that his sheets were not 100 percent Egyptian cotton. Yes. Cheap slumlord. Here's what I’m wondering: Do you think he's going to have nice sheets in the White House? Here's one thing I’m sure of. They won't be Egyptian cotton because we all know how he feels about Muslims, don't we?

Madonna didn't stop politicking there. She also commented on how land belonging to Native Americans is constantly being ravished (a nod to the victorious efforts of the Dakota Access Pipeline protesters, perhaps?), adding, "It just really makes me feel ashamed. Ashamed to be an American, ashamed to be a human being, really." She followed up the statement by playing "American Life."

So, what is one thing Madonna actually does like? Clowns. In fact, Madonna played the entire concert dressed as one. Definitely a hot take after clowns were all over the news for luring children into forests this summer.

I love clowns because they run around trying so hard to make people laugh. And we need that, right? We need to laugh to survive, so I feel that clowns are deeply underrated and profoundly misunderstood.

Sean Penn even joined his ex on stage and jokingly restrained her with handcuffs to auction off their wedding pictures taken by the late Herb Ritts. They sold for $230,000. Additionally, Penn out-bid singer Ariana Grande for a $160,000 Swarovski crystal-covered dress , but said that she could "come over and wear it in my place anytime." Ew, creepy. Grande and Madonna danced together and even kissed during the concert. Ew, even creepier.

In the end, they raised 7.5 million dollars by auctioning off jewelry, gowns and paintings from Madonna's personal collection for Malawi's 1.4 million orphans and vulnerable children. Madonna's son, David Banda, was adopted from Malawi in 2006.

The internet's a place for a lot of things. One of the things the internet is for is to share stories, with zero evidence, that slander famous people. WHY NOT. THEY'RE FAMOUS ANYWAY. THEY CAN TAKE IT.

Anyway, it's super fun to read these stories from Reddit, because why would people lie about this and even if they did, it's just hilarious, short fan fiction about a nice-seeming celebrity being an asshole.

So, enjoy. Everyone likes Wishbone more than Salem anyway.

1. Anix421 met the real Batman. Bruce Wayne. The real Bruce Wayne.

2. Ktjbug concurs, never meet a superhero.

3. Lashes_ got her revenge immediately.

4. Grommash_sunscreen disappointed Louis C.K., not the other way around.

This one is a little different. Louis CK played a show at a theatre I was working at once. After the show I was chucking some bags of garbage into a dumpster in the alley way and he came out to get some fresh air. I noticed it was him but tried to play it cool and just nodded and painfully tried not to acknowledge him since he was probably trying to have some quiet time to himself.

So I just keep focusing on what I'm doing. Taking out the trash. But then a bag ripped open on me mid swing and scattered shit everywhere. He piped up and said "Well thats a bummer." Then headed back inside after giving me a 'good luck' nod and a brief moment of eye contact. I really do know he meant the bag ripping open, but it felt like letting a parent down at the time.

Don't meet your heroes, not because they're all assholes, but because you will probably only let them down.

5. You just have to respect this move from one of the Zs in ZZ Top.

I met one of the artists from ZZ Top at a super nice hotel in Louisville. Wasn't a big deal to me but was to my cousin.

My cousin asked, "I'm sorry to bother you, but may I get an autograph? I'm a really big fan!"

The one Z replied "Sure thing, let me run up to my room really quickly and get the rest of the guys."

We watched him go up to the room and waited for a little over an hour. My cousin cried.

Fuck that Z in particular.

6. If you're ​Mangiyko, your heroes will scare the sh*t out of you.

7. Violetmemphisblue thinks cats can have nine lives but zero stand-ins.

8. Apparently, Bill Nye is a Reddit villain. PocketMAD confirms.

9. Im_inappropriate seems to be a personal enemy of Jason Momoa's.

10. Don't meet your heroes because you might meet them at a urinal.

11. Neil Armstrong's not very 'down to earth.' HA! From imbrium.

2016 is/was the year of devastating celebrity deaths, ramp-ups to geopolitical conflict and hilariously dumb YouTube trends to distract from the aforementioned devastating celebrity deaths and ramp-ups to geopolitical conflict.

Prolific vlogger and 20-year-old who's published a book Jenn McAllister attempted YouTube's most popular trends, from the ubiquitous Mannequin Challenge to the bizarre, niche ASMR slime videos.

It's a great way to both catch up and feel old.

Fans of Nicki Minaj are expressing their anger at the pop star for Instagramming a video making fun of a woman who commenters say is known in South Beach for being mentally unwell.

In the clip, which Minaj filmed from inside her car, the distraught woman can be heard yelling, "I don't need your so-called help!" It's not clear how the interaction started, but as the woman begins to walk away, Minaj yells after her, "What did I do?" She continues to taunt her, asking, "Can we talk?," and sarcastically saying, "You look nice," before laughing.

Minaj captioned the post with the "laughing so hard I'm crying" emoji.

According to the Instagram comments, the woman is known in South Beach to be "unwell in the mind."

The video, which was posted to Instagram on Sunday night, has been viewed 1.5 million times, and has over 7,000 comments on it. A lot of those comments are from people calling out Minaj for making fun of someone who appears to be mentally ill.

We're disappointed that Nicki is laughing in this video. If she was trying to help the woman in some way, it's hard to see how this video helps. Instead, it seems to be taking insensitivity to a whole new level.

Thanks to her hit reality show, The Simple Life​, Paris Hilton is known to many as, in her words, a "ditzy airhead." Turns out she was just playing a character on the popular reality show. That's right! It was all an act! In the years since, Hilton has created a business empire worth billions, and she's ready for the world to take her seriously.

Hilton revealed to Access Hollywood that she wants to rid herself of the "dumb blonde" image that many associate with her. Her business has sprouted 17 different product lines and 70 international stores, and she's ready for people to recognize her success.

“I am a very hardworking businesswoman and entrepreneur, and that’s what I want to be known as now,” Hilton told Access Hollywood.

The hotel heiress admitted that she was playing a character on The Simple Life. (What?! Reality TV is fabricated?! GASP!) Hilton said she and Nicole Richie were told by the producers of the show what personas they should take on.

They said, ‘Nicole you play the trouble maker, Paris you play the ditzy airhead.’ We had no idea what we were getting ourselves into or what a huge success it would be and that I’d have to continue playing this character for five years.

Hilton has a good sense of humor about it, though, admitting that she "was in on the joke."

“I don’t mind because I feel like I really parlayed it into a huge business and it was a lot of fun,” she said. “I think if I was my serious self on the show it wouldn’t have been such a huge success.”

But, alas, the era of frivilous party girl Paris is behind us. Today we enter the dawn of serious-and-highly-intelligent businesswoman Paris.

(Although it should be noted that serious businesswoman Paris still buys herself diamond rings as a treat.)