Children are tiny anarchic geniuses who play by no rules and DGAF about societal expectations. For example, I had a family of "ghosts" who lived in my closet who I regularly talked to. I had no shame about it, whereas now I have to pretend only my clothes live in there. The pressures of adulthood transform us into these boring, bill-paying clones and we lose sight of the madness that once thrived within us, before we were taught to suppress it.

Someone recently asked Twitter to share the "weird" things they did as kids.

Here are 33 of the best, wildest, weirdest responses. CHILDREN ARE THE FUTURE.

1.)

2.)

3.)

4.)

5.)

6.)

7.)

8.)

9.)

10.)

11.)

12.)

13.)

14.)

15.)

16.)

17.)

18.)

19.)

20.)

21.)

22.)

23.)

24.)

25.)

26.)

27.)

28.)

29.)

30.)

31.)

32.)

33.)

Take me back to childhood, stat!!!!!!!!! Adulthood is a bore.

Oh say can you see, a brand that knows the law as it pertains to the display of the American flag?

Jacksonville, Florida was recently blessed with a new IKEA store, giving its residents access to meatballs and massive fights with their significant others as they attempt to follow Swedish assembly instructions.

One Florida Man (or Florida Woman) was salty to see the new store fly IKEA's native Swedish flag right next to the American flag in the parking lot, insisting that "the American flag is supposed to be flown higher than any other countries [sic] flag here."

The person wasn't just wrong in saying "countries" instead of "country's": their whole thesis was incorrect, and IKEA let them know it.

The brand's social media person responded with a quote from the US Code, humiliating the self-righteous 'Murrica person with facts.

Everyone who loves the stars and stripes knows Title 4, United States Code, Chapter 1, Section 7 of the United States Code, which writes, "When flags of two or more nations are displayed, they are to be flown from seperate staffs of the same height."

It's a good lesson: check the US code before you wreck the US code.

Or as Redditor CrudelyAnimated joked, "Do not get into an agument with IKEA about how to assemble stuff."

Bravo! They should work for IKEA.

There's a reason so many scary movies feature a children as antagonists. Because while kids are adorable and bring joy into our lives, they can also be absolutely terrifying. There's something about a tiny person with a high-pitched voice saying or doing something dark or supernatural that can send shivers up and down the spine.

These 23 stories from parents about the "creepiest" things their children have ever said or done might just scare you into getting an IUD.

1.) From Lokis_thor-obing_ass:

I overheard a girl tell her mom, "Her eyes are pretty", referring to the new daycare employee, "I wanna wear them on my charm bracelet."

2.) From SubSahranCamelRider:

My cousin who is three, he keeps referring to any woman he sees as ''tasty''. We would be watching a movie and he would point out a woman and says '' she is tasty''. What he means is that she is beautiful. I can't even walk with him outside because I am afraid he might point out to some woman and say that she is tasty.

3.) From 1982wasawesome:

I was napping on the couch and my then three year old was standing there with a toy, felt saw. I woke up to him saying "I'm going to saw mommy's head off!!" Uhhhh....nope.

4.) From Akummu:

on a long drive through central/western Pennsylvania (all farms & hills or forests & low mountains), my 5yo out of nowhere says, "this will look really cool as a wasteland. you know, after everyone dies"

as much as we asked, he didn't elaborate on that.

5.) From dcwinger12:

Alone with my 4 year old midwestern daughter, when she randomly whispers, "Ope...she's here." While staring out a dark window.

6.) From OnceUponWTF:

My niece and nephew were 13 and 15 at the time and we were watching them for my brother in law while he was out of town. At about 3am i get shaken and awake to two visibly upset teens who start sobbing about a dead woman trying to get in my nieces bedroom window. This jolts my husband out of bed in a hurry, he grabs his handgun and tells me to stay with the kids. They live in a mobile home that sits on risers, so this window is roughly 9 feet at its base.

He goes down the hallway and i hear him shout, "WHAT THE FUCK?!" and run back to the front door and outside. Now the niece and nephew are losing their minds, not wanting their uncle getting hurt so i call the cops and walk to the door to see whats going on.

The dead woman was in fact a woman hopped out of her mind on who-knows-what, naked, and she did very much look like a corpse. She had been standing on the roof of my truck, trying to see in the windows.

7.) From PorkchopSquats:

My 4-year-old likes to play this make-believe game where she is having a baby and needs it “cut out” of her (we have never explained to her what a C-section is). Then the baby always has some sort of deformity, like no eyes or arms or something, and she needs to try again to have a better baby and she is just going to throw the bad one out.

My wife and I have refused to play this game with her once we noticed the pattern, but now she is drafting her younger sister into it and they love it. I’m torn between making them stop or just being happy they’re playing so nicely together.

8.) From TJC528:

So, my son and I stood watching his then 2 yr old daughter as she stood looking, laughing, and chatting away in toddler jibberish at...nothing...in a completely empty hallway. We just watched her and looked at each other with a WTF look on our faces.

Same granddaughter, some years later, still sleeps with me when she visits because "that girl" scares her. That's all she'll say because evidently the girl told her not to tell anyone about her.

9.) From Kindredbond:

When we first moved into our new house, our four-year-old refused to go upstairs. When asked why, he replied "I don’t want the things upstairs to defeat me!”

I get it, little man. I don’t want the things upstairs to defeat me either.

10.) From schuser:

My husband is a farmer. One night he asked me to pick him up after working ground and it was pretty late, around 10 o'clock. So I loaded our two girls up-then 4 & 2 and headed to the field.

We get to the field and C is finishing up his last round so we had to wait for a minute. I rolled the windows down in the van and shut the engine off. After a few minutes my two year old says, "Mommy, who dat man outside?" I said, "I don't see a man, is your ken doll on the floor?" my 4 year old then piped up, "He's right outside your door and staring at you. He's scary. He has blood on his face."

That's when I turned the key, rolled the windows up, locked the doors and called my husband and told him to hurry the hell up because the girls are terrified and there's apparently a scary man outside my door that I can't see but both girls are describing him and what he's doing.

Thankfully C was done and heading up to the van at that moment and we left. My girls are now 5 and 7 and they both still remember that man and refuse to go to that particular field. I have to ask my MIL to watch them when I need to pick their daddy up from there.

11.) From thekkillers:

Not a parent but a good story about my sister

She was about 3 years old and we were getting ready to go to our uncle's house for dinner. She was being really fussy and didn't want to get changed so my dad asks her "Don't you want to go to uncle Dan's house?". She then responded saying "No, I don't like the man in the ceiling." We though it was an odd thing to say but didn't give much thought.

A few years later we were helping my uncle sell the house and it came out that someone had killed them self in the attic back in the 90's.

12.) From LCarkuff:

I looked at the video monitor to make sure my 2-year old daughter was finally asleep since she hadn’t made noise in awhile. I see her standing up in her crib. She slowly bends over to the side, cocks her head towards her knee, and says “hi”.

How did she know I was looking at the monitor at that exact moment?! Plus, the way she was bent at the waste looked humanly impossible, and the night vision function made her eyes look so creepy.

13.) From lostmyempathy:

My 4 year old talks about death a lot- dead pets, dead family members- weird but whatever. The one that freaks me out is when she mentions “my dead grandma that got shot”.

We never talk about my husband’s mom, who took her own life when my husband was a teenager. I’m a skeptic when it comes to the supernatural but it makes me wonder.

14.) From DontWalkRun:

Both of my children, when they were babies, would point to empty corners of the room as if someone were there.

15.) From JohnnyBrillcream:

Posted this before

My 4 year old son had a habit of announcing when he had to use the bathroom. He would say "I gotta go potty". One time he makes his business known and heads off toward the bathroom. He returns seconds later and says "There's already someone in the bathroom". Now I do know for a fact that it's just the two of us home so the hair stands up on my neck. I ask him, "what do you mean". He repeats, "There's already someone in the bathroom".

Now I'm thinking, is it someone "I see dead people" or someone in a hockey goalie mask.

So I grab the biggest knife from my knife block and tell him to stay here. I walk to the bathroom, take a wide angle to see in, nobody. Slowly and quietly walk toward the shower and pull back the curtain.

Nothing.

By now my son has walked around the corner and I ask him "where did you see the person?" He points to an un-flushed toilet and says "See, someone’s already here".

His big brother didn't flush the toilet..........

16.) From raybaroune:

My oldest daughter usually stands beside my bed at night. When she was 5 yo she already had long black hair. The creepy part was that she just stood there not even tried to wake me or my wife up. She were just standing there for two or three hours watching us. When she finished looking at us she'd go back to her bed and sleep like nothing happens. That was a really creepy time of my life. Imagine waking up in the middle of the night cause of an urgent need to pee and looking directly at her eyes.

17.) From Forever_Pancakes:

My 3year old while eating dinner told me there was a man on the balcony with red eyes with his mouth gaping open, like a scream face... we live on the 3rd floor and the only access to that balcony is from inside. Needless to say I didnt turn around.

Hes said so much weird things.. we live in a really really old apartment, and I dont believe in ghosts, but he creeps me out.

Edit: He’s also mentionned a little boy upside down scratching at the ceiling... just casually like it was nothing. On the mean time im shitting myself.

18.) From [deleted]:

I'm just the uncle, and my SIL would be the one to ask for all the details, but I my niece apparently has an invisible friend with a blue face and red hair. SIL thought it was just an imaginary friend, until she talked with other parents and figured out that all the kids living in their neck of the woods have apparently seen the same man, blue face and red hair, but none of their classmates who live farther away did. Niece apparently gets frustrated sometimes when she points at an empty spot and says "He is right here! You don't see him?" This is something several neighbors have reported their kids did as well.

19.) From Adiraiju:

Back in the mid-60s, my cousin's family lived out near the ocean on the coast of Japan. It wasn't so built up back then, and they lived near a rocky cliff where a small lighthouse sat.

My cousin was maybe 8 at the time, but he was sort of obsessed with turtles. He had a pet turtle with an odd name, and he took very good care of it, to the point where he didn't have much of a social life. It was a wild turtle he'd caught, and since he was missing out on socializing anyway, his parents eventually convinced him to let the turtle go. He let it go in a small pond nearby, but he'd go out to talk to it every day.

Anyway, one day there was a big downburst coming up from the sea, it came out of nowhere and was absolutely ferocious. My cousin was caught out in the open and ran to the lighthouse for protection. The storm passed in a few minutes, but the sea was so ferocious that the lighthouse crumbled under the waves.

My cousin was found slightly dazed but unharmed, sitting a few hundred yards from the rubble.

Anyway, my cousin doesn't remember this today, but his parents told me that he wouldn't shut up about how his turtle had turned giant, come out of the sea, and caught him before flying away. His English wasn't the best, but he just kept repeating the same thing:

"Gamera is friend to children!"

20.) From _imtosadforthis:

Not a parent, but a sister

A couple years ago, me and my sister (me 11 and her 14) Were watching my 4 year old sister. she was always a little weird and said weird stuff but nothing to bad, anyway, me and my sister were watching a movie and fell asleep by accident and when my mom got home she started screaming and shaking us to wake up

When we were asleep my mom must have called checking in on us and my little sister picked up and said "I had to do it mommy had to kill them, I cut sissy's throat" And hung up, it still scares me sometimes

21.) From fatlittleyorkies:

Kid's friend hit a bubble and it split into two bubbles. She said it gave birth and was romantic. Then she pooped them and said "murder is more romantic"

22.) From shahajada12:

While changing my daughter in front of the open closet door. She kept looking around me and laughing. I asked her what was so funny. She said, "the man." To which I replied, "what man?" She then pointed at the closet and said, "the man with the snake neck." I turn around and nothing was there. I'm afraid to look into the history of my house to see if anyone hung themselves in the closet. At least she wasn't scared.

23.) From creepyrob:

My 4yo daughter says creepy shit all the time. Two examples:

1. stares at me and says “I want to see the color of your blood”

2.

Children are the future!!!!!!!!! So watch your back.

Adults continue to be so incredibly weird about 16-year-old climate activist Greta Thunberg, and love looking for reasons to discredit her activism as much as they love fossil fuels.

Literal felon Dinesh D'Souza tried to smear her as a Nazi because she wears her hair in braids. Fox News had to apologize after a pundit called her "mentally ill." Now this guy is saying that Thunberg's condemnations of corporate greed don't count, because the teen never officially had a job.

At the United Nations Climate Summit, Thunberg delivered her now-famous speech to world leaders, saying, "We are in the beginning of a mass extinction and all you can talk about is money and fairy tales of eternal economic growth. How dare you?"

Weeks later, journalist Tom Harwood is still pissed, and decided to stand up for the poor, powerless world leaders, and tell Greta, "how dare you?"

Harwood thinks that Thunberg should not be taken seriously because she has yet to have a paying job. He also interprets her crusade to save the planet as screwing "people's livelihoods," because won't somebody think of the oil executives?

People think Harwood should not be taking seriously for such an opinion.

Even members of British Parliament are calling BS on this hot take.

What does Tom Harwood expect of children?

Her work might be unpaid, but it certainly is work.

Somebody needs to call the helpline.

When Hailey Bieber posted on her Instagram story asking for Halloween costume ideas, a devout Christian and/or troll questioned her religious beliefs.

"Spooky [season] is upon us and I need good ideas for Halloween!!! Send some my way," the newlywed model wrote.

Rather than write in things like "sexy mouse" or "sexy Ruth Bader Ginsburg," someone wrote, "Aren't u a Christian?"

Many Christians—or at least all 189 Duggars—don't wear costumes on October 31st, because "spooky" is another word for "Satanic." Hailey Bieber isn't one of them.

Bieber affirmed that yes, she is Christian, and yes, she still celebrates Halloween. Another commenter also called her a "Fake Christian." She responded by saying that she plans on breeding even more so-called "Fake Christians" with her husband Justin (heard of him?).

She posed the question to fans after sharing some of her skimpy costumes from Halloweens past, and nobody called her a Fake Christian for the overt, un-modest displays of sexuality.

Brave of the Biebers to come out and say that Christians can be underwear models, too!!

Congratulations to all the hot Christians on finally feeling seen!!!

Back in the day, a phone scammer could work their magic pretty easily. When phone and internet scammers were newer on the scene, the public was easily tricked and intimidated by people impersonating government officials, banks, or whatever entity they leveraged to score a victim's identity.

But now, a lot more people are savvy to scammer tricks, which means the scammers have cooked up even more insidious methods.

When it comes to the dangers of scamming, social media has functioned as a double-edged sword. On one hand, social media gives scammers even more ways to spy on people and attempt to contact them. But on the other hand, people can now widely share their experiences and educate others about the shady strangers trying to grab their cash.

After encountering a new elaborate scammer tactic, lawyer Pieter Gunst shared his experience with his Twitter followers in hopes it'll help them avoid falling prey.

Gunst shared how detailed and professional the call sounded, and how much of his banking information the scammer already had, which made the lure even more believable.

Even when Gunst realized it was for sure a scammer and hung up, the scammer continued to attempt to attack his account.

Gunst ended the thread by laying out how the scammers obtained the information to make their sound call credible, and urged his followers to stay vigilante about their digital safety.

People quickly commented with their tips, tricks, and similar experiences.

When it comes to scammers, the modern preference for texting over phone calls serves as a form of protection.

Pretty sure the #1 rule for job interviews is to wear something scratchy and uncomfortably formal that doesn't flatter your body type—at least that's always been my go-to. But there are certain outfit choices most of us know to avoid when trying to land a job—most of us.

Employers on Reddit are sharing"the most Inappropriate piece of clothing someone has worn to an job interview." Here's 23 stories of people who opted for something more creative than "black H&M jacket and ill-fitting slacks."

Most of them didn't get the job but they got something more important—Reddit upvotes, and my respect. Because they play by no rules.

1.) From bindingtoggle11:

A few years back, I had someone show up fresh out of the swimming pool. Hair wet. Bathing suit and cover up on. Still wet. Hadn't taken the time to dry off. I went through the interview and a test simulation of the job with her. She actually did very well at the simulation. When I took her to see my boss that made the ultimate decision, he took one look and said no. Didn't ask about the simulation or anything, just no.

2.) From SpicyBoi20:

I saw one guy come from the country club pool in an american flag tank top and swim trunks to the clubs golf cart boy interview. He didn’t get the job and then came back a week later in a full suit apologizing for his previous attire.

3.) From Tivia:

A guy showed up in flip flops, cargo shorts and a tank top. Ended up being the best interview of the day by miles, ended up one of the best people I ever hired. I still don't recommend anyone do this, but it has worked. Edit: this happened in Atlanta, GA. So completely unrelated to the other story in this thread.

4.) From pewter_scooter:

Homecoming dress. She knew she was supposed to dress up for the interview, and that was the nicest thing she had. I felt so bad; she was incredibly embarrassed. It was her first real interview, and in the end I gave her credit for at least putting in the effort.

Edit: For everyone asking, yes, she did get a job offer. The attire didn't factor in nearly as much as her coming in prepared, on time, and with questions.

5.) From Wrong_Answer_Willie:

saggy pants with whitie tightie underwear. when he bent over to sign in at the desk you could see his whole butt (but not his butt hole)

6.) From mphix:

My master’s student came to defend his thesis bare footed because “his slippers got wet”

Edit: this was in Estonia

7.) From Polyfuckery:

He came in to the IT interview in polo, khakis and aqua colored Crocs with an anime maid blushing painted on one and lining up a sniper shot on the other. He was late because security was concerned about his mlp chain wallet.

8.) From ConneryFTW:

A pair of flesh colored leggings that made her look as if she wasn't wearing pants at all, a sweatshirt that opened in the front, that had been pulled to the side a bit to reveal a lacy camisole top. We work as therapists. No fucking way she got that job.

For more info, both her wig and glasses were askew. There was an odor somewhere between human and cat urine. And about halfway through she asked if she could take a break because she left her car running to charge her phone.

9.) From WooIWorthWaIIaby:

I worked in the US Senate a couple years back.

We were interviewing about half a dozen candidates for a pretty junior position. One of the interviewees was wearing a Harvard tee shirt, a Harvard jacket, and Harvard sweatpants. We were astounded.

The first question my coworker asked was "Did you go to Harvard?". The guy did, and he handled the rest of the interview surprisingly well. He didn't get the job but he did become a running joke in the office for a while.

10.) From jmdobosh1:

I was the person! This was 20 years ago, and I had just moved to the city. I was 17 and spent 3 weeks working as a hostess at Denny's. A friend asked if I wanted to go rollerblading, so I was strapped into my roller blades and was wearing athletic wear. She then pulled up to her gym, had me walk in my roller blades up to the second story where the daycare was, and told me that I was interviewing for the Nanny job that she heard was available. I actually got the job because the woman who owned the gym was impressed that I could climb stairs in my roller blades!

11.) From xnormajeanx:

I interviewed a young woman who wore a skirt so short I did actually see her underwear when she sat down. The underwear was pink. I gave her feedback later that she should have worn a suit. This was for a business analyst role. Everyone else was wearing a suit.

12.) From sasamikowa89:

PJs she was pulled out of bed and brought to me and my boss for a interview she didn't know she was having.

After 5 minutes we offered her a job and she actually turned out really well.

13.) From Necrotitis:

Not an employer but when I applied for my city's EMS it was a pretty grueling interview process.

Showed up in a nice shirt, dress pants and a tie, guy who was interviewing with me showed up in ripped Jean's wearing chains and a white tshirt.

This was an interview with 3 senior paramedics and the medical director of the city, they told him to leave and come back when he was serious about it.

14.) From TheCrimsonCourtesan:

Back when I was an hourly manager at Walmart, guy came in with greasy hair, white t-shirt full of holes, and sweat pants. AND to top it all off, he looked like he had a semi...

Surprisingly he didnt smell, and the clothes actually looked clean- so that was good? But still, I gave him a hard no, but the overnight assistant gave him the go. Because he wasnt going to be on her shift, and she thought it was hilarious.

This guy was a fucking nightmare. Wore that same "outfit", now never washed, almost daily. Smelled like death, ass, and cumin. And he was crazy. We were finally able to fire him after he pulled out his pocket knife and cut his coworker. Thankfully the cut didn't cause any real damage to the kid. But seriously, wtf

15.) From JamesEarlDavyJones:

Woo boy. The guy without pants. At my last job, I spent ~10 months in 2017 on a research team doing statistical learning research for health informatics. It’s a very large healthcare company, and they basically took almost a dozen of their PhD researchers from BI, R&D, and Market Dev, temporarily reassigned them to the new Center For Data Excellence. Two of the PhD’s were director/AVP-level, so they each got to bring a team member with them. My director brought me from Market Dev because my background’s in mathematical modeling, but the other guy didn’t have anyone in his department who was free enough to bring along, so they posted the job and started interviewing. I’d do the pre-interview stuff with one of the junior PhDs, and then the senior team members who come in.

Anyway, four days into interviewing, we get one dude up on Skype for his interview, and he’s way too close to the screen, like his laptop’s up on his knees. We asked him to move the laptop back a bit, and he gives it up that he can’t, because the lower part of his shirt has a huge, fresh coffee stain, and his pants are hanging on the adjacent wall. He’d lost track of time and rushed home, and he’d spilled his coffee in his hurry. We told him, “no problem, we’ll find a new time for you. The shirt might be a goner, but be sure to wash the pants in hot water right away.”

We actually hired that dude, and I think he’s still there. Great guy.

16.) From HutSutRawlson:

One time I was having dinner in a restaurant and saw a young woman come up to the counter and ask for a job application. The employees gave her one and she sat down near me to fill it out. This is when I noticed she was wearing a cap with a huge pot leaf on it.

She finished it, returned it to the counter, and asked what the follow up would be. The employee said “we’ll contact you in a few days for an interview... and when you come back, don’t wear that hat!”

17.) From Throwaway7219017:

I worked with a guy who applied to the local big city Fire Department. Apparently all candidates had to submit a passport type photo of themselves, although I fail to see how that's relevant. Diversity quota perhaps?

Anyways, this guy was a gym nut and also sent a full head and torso photo of himself, with no shirt on. When I asked him why, he replied "So they know I'm not a twink."

Well, it must have worked, as Twinky is now a firefighter.

18.) From Sleep_Debt:

I have one from just last month!

This guy was coming in to interview for a Financial Advisor program. Everyone in our office dresses very professional, and most people I interview are dressed in their best suits.

This gentlemen came in wearing a stained white dress shirt, with a yellow tinted white undershirt. I forget what kind of pants, but he had a cloth "joker" belt (why so serious written all over it with the jokers face) neon green and black that he didnt loop through the rest of his pants and was swaying around when walking. He also had very long creepy finger nails that were very dirty and he kept rolling and rubbing his fingers together to get the dirt off subconsciously.

The icing on the cake was he coughed and snorted something up very loudly, then swallowed it, then loudly commented "Nice!".

Somehow this guy aced our assessments and put together a great resume, but was just the exact opposite of professional.

We are still not sure if he was trying to fuck with us, or was that terribly oblivious. I just assumed he was interviewing for someone else, like Ben Affleck in Good Will Hunting.

19.) From Pearl_Jamb:

I was on the opposite end of this. I was fresh out of school and had been struggling to get an interview anywhere. I finally got a call about an interview at a white collar firm, and was told to be at the office at 9:00 AM and to "dress casually." Two days before the interview, I drove out to the office at 5:15 to see how the employees dressed so I could get an idea of the work environment and what to wear. Everyone was wearing dark suits, including the women. I decided to dress business casual, wearing khaki slacks, a light blue button-down shirt, and a brown sport coat.

On the morning of the interview, I arrived at 8:45 AM. I had spent several days preparing responses to potential questions I could be asked, I had fresh copies of my resume in a fancy portfolio, and had done everything I could to make a good impression... I even whitened my teeth and got a haircut the day before. I was ready.

My interviewer didn't show up until about 10:00 AM. She walked in and said, "Sorry I'm late, I had some errands to run this morning." I was a little taken aback, especially considering she came in with a big Starbucks cup. I kept my poker face up and pretended like it didn't bother me that she decided to get coffee instead of being on time. Then I noticed she was wearing yoga pants and a sweatshirt. She shook my hand and said, "I thought I told you to dress casually."

The rest of the interview went as about expected. She even told me that my GPA, achievements, and awards in grad school didn't matter. She pretty much just made fun of me the whole time in between stories about her kids. Awesome.

Maybe if I would have worn a tank top, gym shorts, and flip flops things might have gone better. I did not get the job.

20.) From maddomesticscientist:

I had a young guy come in one day who I think was clearly trying to NOT get the job. Like his dad gave him an ultimatum to get a job or get out type of thing and he was just going to interviews to appease him.

He had his hair in pigtails high on the sides of his head with wire threaded in them so they'd stick out.

Black t-shirt that said "FUCK' on it in giant white letters.

Plaid schoolgirl style skirt.

Rainbow tights.

90's chunky club kid style shoes.

21.) From ObviousTrollxx32:

Had a candidate come in for a recruiting role. She was young and beautiful. But she was wearing some of the tightest yoga pants ever. Nothing was left to the imagination. Her top looked great though.

22.) From brusss:

A see through shirt. I could make out the details of her bra. Right after that, a candidate came in with one eye in bright green shadow, liner, & mascara. The other eye was completely free of makeup. Poor attention to detail! That was weird day.

23.) From blueconsuegra:

I was a recruitment manager for a call center and Oh man, let me list a few:

• 20 something year old strolling in with sweatpants that say "I SMOKE WEED 420" all over them. Literally.

• a t-shirt that said "I hate work"

• A giant gold necklace that said "BITCH"

• leggings with way too much camel toe

• a stripper who came to her interview straight from work.

• An old man who for some reason made holes in his shirt for his nipples to be exposed.

• ninja turtle pajamas

• A man who actually wore decent clothing but then tried to take off his clothing and lay 'like a plank' on the lobby floor. When he went to the elevator, he burned off the buttons with a lighter.

None of this is made up. What an experience.

Working as a 911 responder is not for the faint of heart, you spend your days fielding calls detailing violent crimes, medical emergencies, and the occasional frustrating prank call. Despite the eventful nature of the job, even the most experienced responder has the stories that stick with them, for better or worse.

In a popular Reddit thread, 911 responders and dispatch workers shared the calls they'll never forget, and they range from heartwarming to nightmarish.

1. markko79 saved a girl's vision.

"Harley motorcycle tipped over and the clutch lever went into a 4 year old's eye. Parent was on the line asking what to do. Suddenly, she said, "They're going lift the motorcycle." I emphatically told her to tell them to stop and wait for rescue and EMS. Rescue ended up cutting off the clutch lever and transporting the kid to hospital. She underwent surgery. That was 1982. Just last year, I met the lead rescue officer and the girl herself, now fully grown. They wanted to meet the 911 operator that saved her vision."

2. Swarlolz helped a man face life again.

"I'm a dispatcher for a cab company. One day I got a call from an old man who seemed as if his voice was trembling. I'm naturally polite as I asked for his drop off address he said the emergency room. I casually said "feeling a little under the weather eh?" " I tried to take my life. I vomited most of the pills up and now I feel miserable, can you send a cab quick?" "Certainly sir, anything else I can do for you?"

"I talked to him for 15 minutes before the can pulled up and the driver carried him out to his car. He told me his life's story and why he tried to end it. I visited him in the hospital as soon as my shift was over. He still calls for a cab everyday to take him to a BBQ rester aunt."

3. Crux1836 almost thought a domestic violence victim was prank calling.

"I had a call that started out pretty dumb, but was actually pretty serious:

"911, where is you emergency?"

"123 Main St."

"Ok, what's going on there?"

"I'd like to order a pizza for delivery." (oh great, another prank call).

"Ma'am, you've reached 911"

"Yeah, I know. Can I have a large with half pepperoni, half mushroom and peppers?"

"Ummm…. I'm sorry, you know you've called 911 right?"

"Yeah, do you know how long it will be?"

"Ok, Ma'am, is everything ok over there? do you have an emergency?"

"Yes, I do."

"..And you can't talk about it because there's someone in the room with you?" (moment of realization)

"Yes, that's correct. Do you know how long it will be?"

"I have an officer about a mile from your location. Are there any weapons in your house?"

"Nope."

"Can you stay on the phone with me?"

"Nope. See you soon, thanks"

"As we dispatch the call, I check the history at the address, and see there are multiple previous domestic violence calls. The officer arrives and finds a couple, female was kind of banged up, and boyfriend was drunk. Officer arrests him after she explains that the boyfriend had been beating her for a while. I thought she was pretty clever to use that trick. Definitely one of the most memorable calls."

4. MisterAshe heard someone die.

"I'm not a 911 operator but I spent time doing OnStar/Telematics type stuff, and the moments you remember are those when you're still connected to the vehicle once the dispatch has been made after an accident."

"I've heard a brother beg for his other brother not to die as he bled out, not sure if he actually did."

The one that has stuck with me the most is the one I initially heard the least on - airbag signal, connected to vehicle. I heard a sigh and then silence outside. Nothing but the sounds of passing traffic. A coworker then completes the dispatch (standard procedure) and I attempt to make contact a time or two with no luck. It's simply a matter of remaining on the line to listen to make sure the ambulance gets there.

"Then, a car stops and I hear talking in the background. Soon after someone else stops. Finally - someone starts a last rites type of prayer after asking someone to join hands. I realize then that what I heard at the very beginning of the call was their last breath. The only time that this person's entire existence crossed mine was at the last possible moment. And they don't even know it. Life is fickle. Be good to everyone."

5. ltl_lizzielou thought a little boy was a scared woman.

"I was a 911 dispatcher for several years and one of my most memorable calls was a hysterical woman at about midnight one stormy night. She was absolutely incomprehensible. I kept saying, "Ma'am. Ma'am, you have to calm down. I can't understand you. Ma'am." This went on for what felt like forever. I couldn't get anything useful out of her. My officers were en route to this obviously horrifying situation."

"Finally, she said something about being with her sister. "How old is your sister?" One. Instantly suspicious, I asked, "How old are you?" Five. A five year old boy. So that's how I inadvertently called a little boy ma'am many, many times. Oops."

"The storm had woken him up and his parents were gone. (They went out to move their cars to shelter in case of hail.) He was just very scared. My officers still responded and talked to the parents about not leaving sleeping children alone, but everybody was unscathed.

It wasn't my most tragic call, but it is one I've never forgotten. Poor little ma'am."

6. AshenKilljoy is relieved the man is still alive.

"Not a 911 operator, but volunteered on a Crisis Call Center hotline. I had just turned 18 and was fresh out of training. It was maybe my 8 or 9th shift at the center."

"It wasn't my first call with a suicidal person, however it was the worst and scariest for me. This man had locked himself up in his home, with a gun and was going to shoot himself. He wasn't calling to have someone talk him down, he told me that he wanted someone to hear him die. Of course at this point, I'm trying to find out where he's at, I'm tracing his call and talking to 911 on my other phone."

"He says in the most calm and serious voice, "You're not going to have time for that. Just listen, and it will be over soon." I finally get a trace on the call, and I'm reporting it to the 911 operator. Then it begins. I can hear him fumbling around with the gun, and the clicking of the trigger/barrel. He's getting frustrated because the gun is jammed. With each click and rattle, I'm expecting to hear the gun go off. I'm literally dripping with sweat."

"This goes on for some time, and I'm trying to keep him on the line and to focus on the conversation as he's trying to fix his gun. It seemed like eternity, but I finally heard the police at the door. They had to kick it down since the man refused to open it. They got the gun from him and the call ended."

"The cops later told us they couldn't figure out why the gun had malfunctioned. That really, he should have been dead. So he was either really lucky, or not depending on your thought on the situation. Regardless of it, I didn't last much longer as a volunteer. I started having extreme anxiety every time I picked up the phone, imagining that I was hearing the clicking of the gun.

I'm 26 now, and I think I am finally in a place where I could do that type of volunteer work again."

7. answerstoidiots got a call from the worst hospital ever.

"I used to work as a relay operator (711) and often got mis-dialed 911 calls. We would connect them to 911 but since they connected through us, we had to stay on the line."

"One time I got an old woman who fell out of bed and couldn't get up. I connected her to 911 and from there they tracked her location. The 911 operator is like "Ma'am, are you in such and such hospital, are you calling from the hospital?" "Yessssss, I fell and no one will help me". Not sure what the 911 operator did but about 10 minutes later you hear someone come into her room to help her up. Apparently this woman fell out of her hospital bed and no one noticed for over an hour, until she dragged herself to the phone and called 911. I was like, note to self: never go to this hospital"

8. Davidtanton got a call about a fiance from hell.

"911 Dispatcher here. I took a call once of a house being on fire. So of course we send fire department out. Soon as they arrive on scene they ask for the police to respond (police don't typically respond to this area with FD)."

"Turns out the story was that a girls fiance arrives home and dumps gas on her and lights her in fire. She then runs to the shower to try to put herself out. He follows her, turns the shower off, dumps more gas on her and lights her back on fire. She then runs thru the house thereby lighting the house on fire. She then runs out of the house as FD arrives on scene. So when FD pulled up they had arrived to a body collapsed in the yard on fire. When PD arrives, the male fiance walks out of the burning house, let's himself into the back of a police car and says, "take me to jail".

9. tonywankenobi's mom heard one of the worst sounds imaginable.

"My mom was a 911 dispatcher for over thirty years. She had many crazy calls but one story she told me always stuck out from the rest. One day a man called in. With a calm voice he told my mom he was in the local hotel and that he had doused himself with gasoline and was going to kill himself. He called in so they could evacuate the hotel because "I don't want to hurt anyone else."

While my mom is trying to talk him out of it, she is on another line to the hotel letting them know what's going on and to get everyone out. While emergency services are en route she has to stay on the line whenever possible to keep people calm, reassure them help is on the way and to try her best to keep track of what's up on the other end.

As soon as the guy heard the sirens coming in the distance he asked her if everyone had been evacuated yet. She tried to stall her answer thinking he'd light himself up as soon as she said yes. Didn't work.

"Seconds later she stated hearing the worst screams she's ever heard (and she's heard many during that job over the years) and then the phone went static. And then silence. He died in that hotel and mom had to listen. Lousy day."

10. Ball4Life's friend got a call about the world's worst aunt.

"Not me personally but this is why a friend of mine quit her operator job.

About 5 years ago she got a call ~1 year into her job about a 4 yr old boy who drank bleach under the care of his Aunt. The ambulance was able to make it to the boy and save his life but it was later found that the Aunt made him drink it."

She wanted a 'free ride' into town to go to the Casino.. very disturbing.

TL;DR Aunt almost kills newphew with bleach"

11. TheFlounder's wife is traumatized from the job.

"My wife wakes up crying once and a while after dreaming about certain of her calls. It's always either "mommy won't wake up" or "I backed over my boy". She has not been on the job for 15 years, some things just leave marks."

12. 10_96 helped a woman give birth after being robbed.

"The one that stayed with me:

Gave childbirth instructions to a deaf father via relay for his deaf wife. They were the victims of a home invasion and were tied to chairs. Burglars saw her in labor, panicked, then left. Took dad hours to free himself and call."

"While giving the instructions I obtained a suspect description to put out to surrounding agencies. They were caught in the city to our north during the call. Baby boy was born perfectly healthy.

edit: Obligatory thank you for the gold!"

13. _jeth was helped by the whole community.

"Former sheriff's department dispatcher in charge of non-emergency and 911 calls for a rural, southern county. I picked up the job part-time and was in the process of training. My supervisor was sitting next to me listening to my end of the call, but she was not hooked into the line to hear the whole call."

"Line rings, I answer, it's 911. A young girl, less than 10 years old, is telling me that she, her mother, and her baby sibling are locked in a bedroom. Her uncle is pacing around outside the door holding a knife and threatening to kill them all. She does not know the house number/fire number where they are and mom has basically checked out of the conversation out of fear."

"I have a vague idea of where she is so I send deputies in her direction with the promise that I will get better directions. As is typical in rural areas, everybody owned a scanner and listened like it was their job. My phone starts ringing off the hook. So I am reassuring this little girl on one handset, and holding a second handset up to my other ear taking directions from concerned members of the public. Directions like "Go until you see a broke down truck. Keep going. When you get to the second broke down truck, turn right and continue until you see a large rock." It was also late enough in the evening that everything was dark out."

"The little girl tells me there might be a back door that is unlocked. Members of the public who know the house just from the general location and number/gender of occupants are calling in confirming that there is a back door that my deputies should enter through and that they will not be seen by the perpetrator if he has retreated to the living room. My guys arrive, sneak in the back, walk right up to the guy sitting in a recliner, disarm him, and arrest him. Family gets emergency protective orders so he (ideally) cannot be a threat to them again."

"I almost quit after that call because my adrenaline was running, I was shaking, and I'd had to handle it mostly myself because my supervisor couldn't hear what was going on. I stayed with it and it was one of the best jobs I had. I quit when I moved to another state, but it was a sad decision to make."

"Edit: I would like to add that the whole "not being able to find your house in the country" thing was extremely common back then and I cannot speak to current systems in rural areas. I also got extensive public help via scanner listeners the time a home security company called to report a possible break-in or medical emergency, but they only had a BILLING ADDRESS on file. No directions to the house whatsoever. If you have any kind of company servicing your home make sure they have your actual street address/fire number AND a backup, detailed set of directions to your home including landmarks. I don't want to ever see anyone in an easily preventable emergency because ADP doesn't have the details necessary to send someone to your home."

14. lil-praying-mantis's first responder needed a first responder.

"Before my Grandma died we had to call 911 to get her to the hospital. An older lady, for some reason still an EMT (or first responder, I forgot) came to the house. She had trouble getting up all the stairs to the front door and fell backwards. She thought she hit her head, so she touched it and saw blood all over her palm. In reality she just scraped her hands, but thought the blood was from her head, so she fainted.

We had to call ANOTHER ambulance."

15. wirette had a lady very invested in their fertility.

"I used to take calls for community nursing teams and I'd get one particular lady who would ring me up New Years Day ever year without fail, to make sure I wasn't pregnant.

Not this year Mary, not this year."

16. Call911nowOMG is still haunted by the phone calls.

"Actual 911 operator here for a major North American city. Throwaway for privacy issues, also, I can't go into great detail. Worst two calls I've ever taken have both been callers who committed suicide while on the phone with me."

"First was a female who jumped from her apartment balcony while on the phone with me. I heard her scream the whole way down and I heard her hit the ground. I still have nightmares of just the sound of her screaming and hitting the ground."

"Second was a male who hung himself while talking to me. He said he didn't want to be by himself when he did it so he called 911. He apologized for what he was about to do, but he wouldn't tell me where he was. We never got to him on time. I had to sit there with an open line and him hanging until the police finally located where he was."

"You know that sound in the movies you hear when someone has hung themselves? You know, the sound of the body hanging from the rope and somewhat swinging back and forth? That creaking sound the rope makes from rubbing against whatever it's tied to? Ya I had to listen to that sound for quite sometime before he stopped swinging."

"To this day I can't watch a scene in a move where someone has hung themselves without having a mini anxiety attack and almost throwing up. I've thrown up a few times soon after it had happened."

17. jhoudiey received a phone call from hell.

"One of my first calls after I finished training. A young girl calls and says "I caught my 15 year old brother with another guy again", but wouldn't give me a whole lot more. I kept asking her and finally she says "well, I panicked and called my dad and when my brother heard he drank some Drano, and now he's starting to pass out". So of course the entire cavalry is on their way to her, but I keep her on the line until they arrive. She says that her dad told her to call the police, and us, and that he was on his way home too. I was confused as to why she'd have to call the police, being gay isn't something the police give a shit about."

"Anyways, he's transported to the hospital, and the police call back to ask where we transported to, and I asked them about the call. They say "oh, for the sexual assault?" i was super confused, and they go "oh yea, the guy your kid was caught with was 38". Oh. that's why the police we called. Got it. Kid ended up dying in what turned out to be the weekend of 15 year old suicides. (he was friday, a girl hung herself saturday, and another girl ODed on sunday)."

18. goadrush got a call about a very unconventional bath.

"Hi guys, I actually am a 911 operator. First ever 911 I answered was about a naked man sitting in a bath tub on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere. He was drunk and we still don't know where he got the tub.

Edit: west Tennessee since everyone keeps asking."

. “I don’t think anybody doubts whether I’ve done some bad things. The question is: what, of course, and how...and most importantly, why?”

-Ted Bundy

If you're a true crime junkie you will relate hard to these killer memes. From serial killer obsessions to solving cold cases from your couch, this list totally nails what it's like to be utterly obsessed with true crime.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

22.

23.

24.

It's October 11th, and you know what means: It's Hallie and Annie's birthday!

How blessed are we, as a society, to be celebrating Parent Trap Day so soon after Mean Girls Day.

Enjoy these tweets and support these women, and then maybe my parents will get back together!

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

22.

23.

24.

25.

It's not uncommon for businesses to ask homeless people to leave, but that doesn't make it okay. People on Twitter decided to take a stand in defense of a homeless man after a video of a Starbucks barista kicking him out went viral.

The video was filmed by a customer named Sajid Kahloon, who was at a Starbucks in Essex, England, when he saw a man eating leftover food left out by customers. So he offered to buy the man a sandwich and chocolate cake. As they sat outside eating together, a barista came out and asked the homeless man to leave.

"You can't just ask him to leave," Kahloon told the barista, in a video shared on Facebook by local news outlet Your Southend. "Let him eat the food and he can leave. What's the problem? ... Is he not human?" The barista responded by saying the man"can't stay here. He comes here all the time... He's going to come back."

The video went viral, wracking up thousands of comments and sparking a debate over whether homeless people should be permitted to occupy a Starbucks.

Some defended the barista's right to kick him out.

Marcus Ortt writes:

Yes, he can ask him to leave, because is their property. Do not forget they need to keep certain standards. What about hygiene and infection control? And the safety of others? Is it really worth it to sacrifice the health and wellbeing of others so you can virtue signal on the internet? Especially women. You've got your maternal instincts to keep your children safe, not an old grown man.

But many others defended the homeless man's human right to be there, and praised Kahloon for helping him out.

Amanda Jayne Fuller says:

If he had a paid meal they had no right to request he leave . Wouldn’t give em a penny for their overpriced food . I’d have gone to boots or greggs. But well done lovely gesture I’m sure the man appreciated.
Starbucks are arseholes

And Steph Cole writes:

Good on you Sajid. Shame u didn't video the 2 workers faces though. Homeless or not, everyone needs to eat. What you did was a lovely gesture. That poor man should not have been so badly judged, I expect for the way he looked and was dressed. Shame on you Starbucks.

The video also caused a stir on Twitter, where some people are calling for a boycott of the popular coffee chain.

A spokesperson for Starbucks has apologized, saying the interaction in the video was "not indicative" of the company's ethos and that they would be taking "appropriate action."

They released this statement:

We want every customer to have a positive experience, and we apologize that we did not meet that expectation in this instance. The interaction on video is not indicative of the environment we strive to create. We are looking into the circumstances surrounding this customer’s experience and will take appropriate action to ensure that our stores remain welcoming places for everyone.

Love can be deeply deceiving, and loving someone enough to pursue marriage doesn't necessarily mean you're healthy for each other. Unfortunately, a lot of toxic people are strategic about waiting to show their true colors until you've vowed to love them eternally. Luckily, divorce is an option that can often lead to a much happier life.

So, when you see the bright red flags mere days after the wedding, it's never too soon to call it quits before you get sucked further down a rabbithole of misery and manipulation.

In a recent Reddit thread, people who got divorced within a year shared what went down, in hopes of making others feel less alone.

1. Hevaly_armed_proto saw her true colors really fast.

"She nearly killed me because she thought i was cheating from some texts that went to my mother."

2. fukenhimer's marriage dissolved over sunscreen.

"Honeymoon. We dated for 5 years but on the honeymoon we had a big argument over my liberal use of sunscreen. She refused to wear any because of ‘chemicals’ and I liberally use it due to my ginger skin. We seriously argued over this for a good hour and she refused to even go into the pool with me because of sunscreen chemicals."

"After a scuba adventure with her she could hardly walk because she got so burnt on her legs whereas my skin didn’t change. She then tried to convince me that it was all my fault because I didn’t force her to wear the sunscreen and that the honeymoon was ruined."

"It was then I realized I picked the wrong person. After a few more psycho arguments (mad at me because of something in her dreams, mad because I didn’t remind her to bring an umbrella....) I had to call it quits. I can’t stay with someone who constantly blames me for their own problems. Luckily no kids and I got back everything I brought into the marriage."

3. Monkey_Pube got married because of grief.

"I had been fooling around with this girl for awhile. I never wanted anything serious, and I KNEW that from the start. Then my mom was killed...I went into a deep depression and this girl was there for me. Her mom had died of cancer about a year earlier and I guess we really bonded over that. It pushed us much further emotionally than we ever should’ve gone. We ended up doing a courthouse marriage. I knew within the month that I had fucked up. BUT I didn’t want to just give up and get divorced."

"Once the emotions of my moms death passed, I realized how toxic she really was. She was an incredibly unstable person and ended up just taking me into an even deeper depression. We divorced about a year ago (after being married for about 10 months), and I was immediately much happier. Marriage shouldn’t be taken lightly, but people also shouldn’t force themselves to be in unhealthy relationships. We all make mistakes. Don’t waste your life with someone that doesn’t deserve you."

4. ersul010762's partner was next level toxic narcissist.

"When he said my son's suicide attempt interfered with his (ex's) birthday party."

5. BigHairyApeMan's ex got jealous of funeral hugs.

"Super late to the Party here, but I knew it was over when she started a fight at my Brothers funeral because female attendees were giving me hugs as part of condolences."

6. Mister_E_Phister's ex found a new man at rehab.

"Her running off with a guy she met in rehab was a pretty solid clue that it wasn't meant to be."

7. NotTheMan378 found out Nicole was really Wesley.

"She went out for girls' night and met a new friend named Nicole at a bar. Started texting her a lot, then going to hang out now and then. We had a baby at home and she kept trying to go hang out with this girl from another town over with no last name whom I was not allowed to meet. His real name was Wesley"

8. justtryingtopassthru helped their cousin escape an abuser.

"A cousin of mine divorced her husband after six months. She knew when we had to pick her up from her home after having been recently beaten. That day, we packed up all of her stuff and never let her go back."

9. raaaaaaaaaaaachel's mother-in-law learned the importance of quality time the hard way.

"My MIL got married the first time when she was really young. Left him a month later. Turns out he was a raging alcoholic. She had no idea because her family was super overprotective and they were never really allowed to spend time together alone before they got married. Who knew spending time with someone could be the key to knowing if they are a good partner??"

10. khreper's ex wasn't over her ex.

"When she fucked her ex within the first 6 months..."

11. Nika65 caught his ex cheating while he had cancer.

"When I caught my new bride having a work place affair while I was receiving cancer treatments. It was not a pleasant time for me..."

"EDIT: Holy crap, woke up to an awful lot of really nice notes! Thank you everyone and to those who gifted silver and gold! I am going to try to respond directly to some folks but I will say this here: This happened about 25 years ago (yes, I am an old guy). It really sucked at the time ... the day I found out I was a few months into both a major surgery and then daily radiation treatment, I was down to about 118 from my normal 155lbs."

"But, as it turned out, it was really a good thing. We did not have a house or kids and the divorce was rather simple. I went on to get married again and have 3 incredible kids I would never have had otherwise. The entire experience taught me a lot about the power of forgiveness (admittedly, it took me too long to learn this lesson) and I have a pretty great life today. If you are currently going through something similar, please know that life can and does get better! :) Thank you all again and, while I watched Breaking Bad, I really never made the connection to me so many of these comments have me laughing out loud!"

"EDIT #2: So we tried the whole marriage counseling thing after I caught her. The marriage counselor, however, was my wife's personal therapist. We had one meeting and the therapist asked to meet with me privately. She subsequently reported to my wife "Um, Nika seems to have a lot of anger....." Ya think! I had just lost over 20% of my body weight, I was still going through treatments, and I found out my wife of less than a year was sleeping with a co-worker..... LOL"

12. Hiraethion found out about the affair through Facebook.

"When I was in Iraq and she posted a picture on Facebook of her and another guy laying in bed together, it was obvious that they had just hooked up. Don’t get married to fix relationships (pro life tip)."

13. marguerite_lavache felt forced into marriage in the first place.

"The next morning I woke up and thought “...when would be a socially acceptable time to get divorced?”

In hindsight that says miles about why I felt I had to get married."

14. GotSeoul lived the worst part of a Kanye song.

"Best girlfriend I had to date at the time. I was in my late 30s had never been married. Dated about a year. Got married. Shortly after she asked to have her name on all of my assets (a few rental houses, current house, and some financial instruments, the cars). Not a problem as we were married I thought, but on a Wednesday she insisted it be done by that Friday. I didn't have time to do that because work and a deadline, I could start it the next week I said."

She pitched a fit and said if I loved her I would do it by Friday. I found this strange and decided not to start it and see what happened. She moved out of our bedroom into a guest room. Got cold around the house, told me she would move back in to our bedroom when I finished getting everything done.

At this point I thought "Bullshit" and told her so. I went to my family lawyer to seek advice. She advised me not to put anything in her name at this point. Gave me the name of a marriage counselor.

She didn't want to go to counseling, she continued to live in the guest room, I took my lawyer's advice and did nothing about the assets.

The long and short of it was after 1 year off marriage, when on our anniversary she told me I didn't have her in my heart, I thought to my self, "this is bullshit."

About a week after that I told her if this is the way it's going to be, I'm not going to be married like this. She then told me, "Ok, so what are you going to give me?" Yes ... she said that.

I consulted my lawyer on what a judge would come up with regarding community property for the past year. Number came up to 20g I took that number and added about 20 grand and proposed that to her so we can make it easy. I was going to spend more than that in lawyers fees if it got ugly.

It got ugly.

A week later I got served with papers, with all said in the complaint, when added up, she was going after $750k for 1 year of marriage. 1 year of divorce proceedings and 2 years of property settlement proceedings on what should have been a 2-hour problem.

Judgement came, 215 points in the judgement, I owed her what would have been the community property (about 20 grand), but awarded me attorney's fees. So in net, she owed me about 30 grand and left her to go buy her own car.

Turns out this judge had worked her ass off through school to become a lawyer and the same to become a judge by 40 years old. I was told by another attorney that normally this judge never gives attorney's fees, but was so pissed off at the gold dig my wife attempted, that she felt it was justified in this case.

Even though I came out OK financially, it was an emotional train wreck to have this happen and go through all that. It's been 15 years since it happened. I was not date-able for about 2 years, but now very happy with where I am and who I'm with.

EDIT:

Wow, this reply to the OP really blew up. Thanks much for the silver and gold. These are a first for me. Not sure, how do I find out who gave those to me so I can thank them directly? I can probably google that. :-)

Lots of good comments. I'm trying to answer each question but might take me a while I'm in SE Asia right now and will be heading to bed soon. Thanks much for your thoughts. This happened 15 years ago so I am over the hurt but the thoughts that you have been sending me have been uplifting.

"For the others with the stories similar to mine, and worse, I feel for you, I really do. I don't wish this type of thing on anybody. Divorce can be nasty and I don't wish it on anyone. But in the case of damaging relationships, it's a tough but needed remedy."

15. elocinardnassac's ex cheated with her sister-in-law.

"Got married in late May, by August or September I found out from my dad that my husband (now ex) and my brother's wife were sexting. She was also my bridesmaid at our wedding. She felt guilty and told my dad who had to tell me. I forgave him like a dingus and about a year and a half later I found pictures of him sucking two different dicks in our house and also wearing quite a bit of my nice makeup.

All of this AFTER we moved to Washington from Florida. It's been wild. We're obviously divorced now. Edited for clarity since I guess that needed to be said?"

16. FreeFile knew it wouldn't work out.

"I knew it was a mistake about two months into our engagement. I actually broke up with her for a week but didn’t tell anyone other than my parents. Something just didn’t feel right. She ended up begging me every single day and I just felt really bad and got back with her. We pretended like it never happened. Got married 9 months later and she ended up cheating on me a little over a year into our marriage. I still don’t f*cking understand her logic behind all that but whatever. It’s done and I’ve moved on but I’ll never understand why she wanted me back so badly and did that not even two years later."

Edit: Jeez, thanks guys and gals for the kind words and chats. If you’re going through a rough patch, it does get better! One day at a time. I’ve remarried and we’re planning on starting a family soon. Would’ve never imagined rebuilding after what happened with my ex. Keep the faith and things will turn around."

17. Babblewocky got away, luckily.

Day after we got engaged. He changed. Then he uninvited my family to the wedding- said they would take my attention away from him.

We lasted three months, and then I ran and hid.

Edit- to everyone who is asking “Then why did you marry him then?!?” I totally get that question. Here is the answer:

I felt worthless.

So when you grow up feeling worthless, and a partner says “Yeah, you are worthless, and everyone can see that, but you know what? I will love you anyway.” You jump on that shit like it’s the last living plant in a nuclear wasteland.

I didn’t leave because i honestly believed it was either him or suicide. I left because he was killing me anyway and I decided it would be less painful to just die on my own. Then I lived.

"I hear this question a lot. If you ask someone why they stay, it’s because you don’t understand the trauma they are experiencing. That means you are lucky, in that regard.

Be careful with this shaming question. It is a part of our trauma."

18. DeathSpiral321's cousin's wife was sleeping with the boss.

"A cousin of mine married someone who seemed like the perfect woman. They worked in the same store together, and he would brag about how his wife was getting promoted quickly in the company."

"A few months into the marriage, she tells him she's going out with friends for the evening. An hour or so later, my cousin gets a call from one of his friends. The friend saw her having dinner in a restaurant... With the manager of the store that they both worked at. Once he confronted her about it, that was basically the end of the marriage."

"A smile is a curve that sets everything straight."

- Phyllis Diller

Set your morning straight by laughing at these hilarious memes. Everyone deserves a laugh, even people who plan on being totally useless and achieving absolutely nothing all day.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

22.

23.

Do we have any responsibility towards other people's children in public? That's the question Redditors are mulling over after a man posted about an incident at his local Five Guys. I'm ambivalent towards both parties in the story - but more importantly, I'm grateful that I'm childfree and don't have to worry about my offspring running into traffic.

I was at Five Guys Burgers eating at a table nearest to the exit while a young woman and her son came in. When she was ordering, her kid was messing around near the tables and started pushing on the exit door. I looked over at the mom, she was waiting for her order and playing on her phone. The kid got the two sets of doors open and was now outside and going towards the street.

Oh no!

I yelled over to the mom that her kid was outside, she frantically ran out and got him. On her way back in she gave me shit and asked why I didn't stop him. I told her that it is not my responsibility to watch her kid. She grabbed her order and stormed off past me with a loud "FUCK YOU!"

On the one hand, he could've intervened. On the other, she should've kept a closer eye on her child.

AITA? I mean I easily could have stopped the kid, but the mom could have gotten pissed about as well.

What's worse, though: a stranger getting angry at you or someone's injury/death/loss, especially when it was preventable? I think a woman would've been more likely to act. Call it maternal instincts, call it socialization, call it what you will - I would've done something. But maybe I'm just __that__ good of a person.

EDIT Extra Info

The street wasn't busy and I was the only customer in the store aside from the mom. By the time she got to him he was just off the curb. I yelled to her as soon as he got the second door open. The most I am willing to do is alert her of any danger.

Reddit decreed that Everybody Sucks Here (ESH). That's a designation I'm comfortable with. What do you think? Per SecretRatto,

ESH, but you take the cake. You watched a small child exit the building. The kid is not your responsibility, however common decency as a human means that you step in and intervene as soon as you notice something is off. Instead of speaking up, you let the kid get through TWO sets of doors, and only sounded the alarm once the kid kept moving towards the street.

Yeah, mom should pay more attention, however there are instances where horrible things can happen even when parents are consistently diligent.

Your logic is what? Let the kid get hurt (or worse) and only do the bare minimum, at the last possible moment, because you don't like the POS mom? You cared more about the mom's reaction than the safety of a small child, which means you're the bigger asshole, and trying to hide behind shitty 'not my responsibility' nonsense.

Whether from watching 'The Office' or working at one yourself, you're familiar with the perils of office coworkers. There are so many ways for them to irritate you on the clock! Here's a short list: hogging the private bathroom, making bad small talk, inconveniencing you with tasks that aren't work-related, inviting you to social events you'd rather avoid, trying to date you when you're not interested/married/their direct report, etc. The perils of #officelife are many, varied, and sometimes complicated. Yesterday, one Redditor described an incident that has me feeling torn. It involves a signature scent, sales, and pregnancy - oh my!

Years ago I was working in an office, and the two women sitting in front of me were pregnant. These were the first three desks next to the entrance. The first and me were in the same department, as were the other twenty or so people around us. The pregnant coworker in front of me wasn't, but refused to change when they moved her department to our back. Lets call her PC for Pregnant Coworker.

One morning I receive a message from PC asking if I'm wearing cologne. This was the first time I ever interacted with her because she didn't even replied to my "good morning" and I was puzzled by her typing instead of talking. It went like this:

I had a coworker like this! She hated our other colleague for sniffling thanks to his chronic congestion, and would ask him to stop via message. Repeatedly.

Me: Em...Yes. Why?

PC: I don't like the smell.

Me: Oh, I'm sorry.

PC: Can you stop using it? You can use it on the weekends.

Me: Mm, I have another cologne, maybe I can use that one.

PC: I don't like that one either.

Me: Sorry, I'm not going to stop using cologne.

PC: Then you can change desks with someone.

She came into that conversation with a hard agenda: persuade him to cease using cologne, and if that fails, force him to change desks. She sounds fun!

I asked everyone in the department and no one accepted. She also refused to move to her department with my help moving her things.

I didn't stop using cologne.

I understand she was pregnant and sensitive to smells, and even with her attitude I tried to help, but I worked on sales, and in a subtropical climate, cologne was basic. Not to most of my coworkers, though.

Alternately: what kind of nightmarish Sales Guy would insist on wearing cologne every day? You don't meet clients at the office (typically), and they can't smell you over the phone. The whole thing's weird to me.

To be honest if the other pregnant woman had asked me, I would have stopped, or at least carried it with me so when clients came I could use it, but this woman was rude and ate smelly breakfasts at her desk.

AITA?

Her breakfasts might've smelled, but food is necessary to survive - L'Homme for Men or whatever isn't. That said, she sounds like someone difficult to get along with. I'm not rooting for either party here. I'm rooting for capitalism to fail.

Reddit concluded that the OP was, in fact, the *sshole.

YTA. The last two offices I’ve worked in have been scent free for this reason. Plenty of people have sensitivity to perfumes and it’s inconsiderate to stink up the shared air.

-thrillho420

Hmmm. What's your take? Was 'PC' unreasonable or was SG in the wrong?

“When it comes to sex, the most important six inches are the ones between the ears.”

-Dr. Ruth

If humor turns you on, these funny memes will send you into total ecstasy.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

22.

Hello! It's Sunday. What were your plans today? Better scrap them, because you have a new priority: gawking at photos of Justin Bieber falling off a unicycle. Ol' Biebs took a tumble and it's the only thing that matters. Before gazing upon these photographs, I had enriching relationships with my friends and family and hobbies that kept me busy. Now, I have nothing but the image of Hailey Baldwin's husband falling from a one-wheeled bike. Somehow, I'm more fulfilled than ever. Scroll through to see if Scooter Braun's protégé eating sh*t on pavement changes your life.

In conclusion:

Happy Sunday!

In belated honor of National Coming Out Day, I present a tale that's equal parts funny and heartwarming. Author Grant Ginder relayed an experience that would give any closeted teenager heart palpitations: his father finding his stash of NSFW photos. This was back in the 90s, so Grant would download 'beefcake' shots and stash them in a file called 'downloads.' Sneaky! When confronted with this information, Grant put his imagination to good use. The result? A hilarious coming-of-age anecdote that - fortunately - has a happy ending.

TWIST!

But wait! There's an epilogue.

Twitter absolutely ate Grant's story up.

Kudos to Grant and his loving, supportive family. And yes, I'll admit to misreading his last name as 'Grindr' at first. But with it positioned so close to the word 'beefcake', can you really blame me?

A handful of recent tweets from The Good Place actress Jameela Jamil sparked a discussion about dog piling and internet power dynamics, and whether celebrities should take responsibility for their fans.

It all started when Jamil, who is known for discussing body positivity and eating disorders, as well as calling out the Kardashian family's contribution to toxic beauty standards, updated her Twitter bio to reflect the loyalty of her fan base.

Jamil posted a tweet warning people to not start fights with her if they weren't prepared for a public response, and the ire of her many followers.

The tweet also included her updated bio, which includes the warning: "I respond publicly, so don't start fights with me you can't finish."

She wrote:

"I understand that I have a big following, so challenging me (often with abuse), and me responding, can result in you being piled onto by my big following. So here is my warning and declaration; so you know what you’re getting yourself into. Otherwise don’t bother trying me"

Jamil followed up her warning by clarifying that she's not condoning dog piling, but it's an inevitable reality of challenging someone with as many followers as her.

"I’m not in any way condoning or encouraging dog piling. But it is an unfortunate consequence of picking a fight with someone with a large following. And that person can’t control it. I take on people MUCH more famous than me, but I do it fully prepared for the inevitable backlash," she continued.

She finished her PSA by sharing that she doesn't cry foul play when the Kardashians' millions of followers come for her after a critique, and she's merely warning trolls that a similar fate could befall them.

Some of Jamil's fans applauded her for being transparent and not sitting back and taking abuse on her page.

However, one follower pointed out that Jamil's rhetoric has been used by other public figures to justify abuse to naysayers, and that it doesn't set a good precedent for internet discussion.

Jamil responded in good faith, saying her warning is largely meant for the people (usually men) who come on her page with abusive/sexist/racist commentary.

Another woman asked Jamil to rethink her stance, or at least her wording around the subject of fans dog piling "the opposition."

A few others claimed the wording sounds more like a threat than a warning, and somewhat contradicts the rest of Jamil's bio which says she's a "work in progress" always looking to learn.

However, others think it's completely within Jamil's right to set boundaries on her own page, and believe the backlash proves the original point.

At the end of the day, Jamil isn't wrong - if you start a fight with a celebrity on Twitter, it's likely their fans will come for you. The larger question at hand is how much responsibility lies on celebrities to try and reign in their fans? Also, if a troll is coming out of the woodwork with abusive rhetoric, is there any reason to protect them from dog piling?

Being a mom is no joke. Not only are you tasked with raising a tiny human (or humans), but you have to deal with a barrage of unsolicited advice/judgment/criticism from acquaintances and strangers, as if they have any clue what your life is like (they don't). It's called "mom-shaming" and it's an epidemic. A viral post shared from the popular account Breastfeeding Mama Talk highlights this problem. It's from a mom who was shamed by a complete stranger for the crime of using her phone while out shopping with her two toddlers. Lock her up! Lock her up!

The mom was waiting in line at Costco (we all know this can take an eternity) with her two toddlers when a male stranger approached and told her to get off her phone, claiming her toddlers were fussing because they needed her attention.

"To the man at Costco today who glanced over at me on my phone while my babies were fussing and felt the need to say, “You see these babies? They fuss like that because they want your attention. Maybe you should get off of your phone and give them your attention.”

The mom breaks down the 3 main problems with the stranger's comments: 1) He entirely misinterpreted the toddler's normal toddler behavior, which their mom understands perfectly and knows how to handle.

First of all, I had no idea the toddler saying, “Mama, pizza, mama, pizza” over and over and the baby making pre-cry warnings to alert me that if we don’t move soon he’s gong to lose it wanted my attention. Thank you for that brilliant analysis of the situation.

2) He missed the part where she had been giving them her full attention for 15 minutes in an attempt to calm/distract them.

Secondly, I had been in the Membership line for 15 minutes already. I pulled out books, snacks, patty cake, and even took to creepily pointing out items in buggies as customers left the store to entertain them.

3) He had only been in line for "two minutes" when he made his assessment of the situation.

Thirdly, you had been in the Refunds line next to me for a total of two minutes or else you would have seen the smiles and laughs and interaction.

4) She was on her phone trying to get the Costco app downloaded so she could get out of the line as "quickly as possible" before her toddlers' meltdown escalated. In other words: SHE WAS ALREADY DEALING WITH IT.

Lastly, after 15 minutes, these babies got a bit fussy. And on the meltdown scale, they were barely even at a 1. Sensing the meltdown brewing, I took out my phone, downloaded the Costco app and texted my husband to ask what our log in is in an attempt to just get my membership card on my phone. Because I ran out of tricks and my kids ran out of patience and now my goal was to just get us out of this line as quickly as possible before they released the kraken.

She then calls out the stranger for "shaming" a mom of two children, making an already-stressful situation worse for her.

But thank you for your parenting advice. Thank you for taking the time out of your day to shame a young mother with two tiny children. Thank you for seeing a stressful moment and deciding, “I think I’ll make this worse for her.”

Finally, she urges everyone who witnesses a mom with young kids in public to assume that she is "stressed out" and to understand that she is already "trying her damndest" to deal with/survive the situation as best she can. So "please mind your own business" and leave her the F alone.

Everyone, if you see a mother (or father) with young children out in public ANYWHERE, assume she is stressed out. Assume she is trying her damndest to get through the situation. Assume this is the very last place she wants to be. Assume she’d rather be home cuddling, playing, running around with her babies. Assume she probably has had no sleep since her first child was born. Assume she is hungry because her toddler decided he wanted extra eggs this morning so she gave him her breakfast in addition to his own. And if you have nothing kind or supportive to offer her, please mind your own business.

Our babies are healthy, our babies are happy (despite the fact that they are not currently pleased with standing in line at Costco), and our babies are loved fiercely by us. And for the love of God, our babies can wait 2 minutes while we try to solve a problem on your phone."

Here is the full post, shared along with a pic of the mom's adorable toddlers:

Clearly, the story has resonated with people. The post went viral, wracking up thousands of shares, likes and comments.

Commenters, most of them moms themselves, are supporting the mom and sharing their own similar experiences with mom-shamers.

Insane that this phenomenon is so common, and this post serves as an important reminder to people to *channels Chris Crocker-level urgency* LEAVE MOMS (AND DADS) ALONE. If you ever feel tempted to criticize a parent from a distance, remember that you have no idea what they're going through, what their parenting methods are, or how long they've been in line at Costco.