You simply haven't lived until you've survived a horrible hotel or motel experience. Whether it's haunted by ghosts trapped in the old stairwells, the carcasses of roaches, or neighbors with loud sex lives, few experiences will etch themselves into your traumatic memory bank like a shady motel.

Most of us aren't made of money, so if we find ourselves in need of a last minute crash spot, we'll go for the nearest discount hotel, one star reviews be damned. In most cases these stays are uneventful or mildly disappointing. But there are times when the shadiness is so deep and horrific it leaves you with a story for the rest of your life.

In a popular Reddit thread, people shared their worst motel and hotel stories, and it'll make you never want to leave your house again.

1. onlythefunny's dog was very hungry.

That time I couldn't make my dog stop licking the bed spread :-\

I finally had to lock it in the bathroom so he wouldn't lick a hole in it.

2. Giantxbones had a horrible stay.

Planned a trip once and looked into motels/hotels about 30 minutes outside the city. I can't remember the name of the hotel because it wasn't a national chain, plus it was 7 years ago (and I think my mind's done its best to shut out the experience as best it can).

Anyway, the pictures on the website all looked nice. Rooms looked good for what I needed and with a free breakfast, what could go wrong? It was $100 a night, seemed reasonable.

So I get there, and in the large hotel parking lot, there are only about 2-3 cars outside.

I go in, and it takes roughly 15 minutes for someone to meet me at the front desk. I check in, and start off to my room. The elevator door opens and boom, dark hall way, no lights.

I was like "wuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut". It was being renovated or something, and you had to walk through the renovation to get to your room.

I get to my room, and it's roughly about half the size I thought it was. I go to the bathroom because I want to shower after a long roadtrip. I turn on the water and the cold water doesn't work. I turn on the hot water, and it never gets hot, it just stays cold.

At this point I'm getting really frustrated cause I'm paying $100 for this experience. I'm so tired that I say fuck it and try to take a nap. I go to sit on the bed and something moves. I don't know what it is at this point, but I know I saw something small move.

I lift the pillow and...........spider nest. WTF

I immediately pack my stuff back up and again walk through the renovation to the elevator. I press the lobby button, the doors shut, and......you guessed it, elevator gets stuck. Now I'm trapped, and after about 3 minutes in there, the lights also go out.

I pull my cellphone out and try calling the main desk. It takes 4 calls before they pick up. They say they'll send someone. After 2 hours, finally someone gets the elevator working and I'm let out.

After I get to the front desk and get my refund, I storm out of the place and toward my car. On the way, I trip on one of those long concrete barriers at the front of parking spots, and promptly break my wrist.

TL;DR Thought I was going on vacation, ended up experiencing hell on earth.

3. slamdancer slept in a bolted down room.

Driving cross-country from Wisconsin to Florida. Three o'clock in the morning, we've been on the road for hours, and neither of us can keep our eyes open anymore. We agree we have to stop at the next hotel, motel, Holiday Inn...anything.

Shortly we come upon an exit with a hotel. It's easy to tell this, because its name is just "Hotel".

We go in, and it looks pretty shady, but it's late and we're exhausted, so we get a room from the nice Pakistani fellow behind the desk. We only need a few hours sleep, so we request a wakeup call.

Opening the door to our room, we see that it's definitely shady, as everything in the room has been bolted and/or chained to the walls or floor.

At least, everything had been, because it's all gone now. The television, the mirror, the fridge, the end tables, the phone...they've all been stolen, and judging by the conditions left behind, usually a good amount of force was employed.

We pile our bags between the two beds and both sleep with knives under our pillows.

As I drift off to sleep, my exhaustion-fogged brain catches onto an important detail I had missed earlier...how are they going to leave a wakeup call when we don't have a phone?

7:00 a.m. - KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK"HELLO IN THERE! IT IS TIME FOR YOU TO BEING AWAKE NOW! HELLO! YOU MUST BE GETTING WITH THE WAKING UP!"

4. Spoon_Shaker listened to porn in action.

We needed a place to stay just one night after attending a concert an hour or so away from home. It only needed to be a simple place to stay, but I found a cheap little place with a spa in the room and though it would be fun to use the opportunity for a bit of romantic night away. We arrived before the gig and found the place painted a cheesy shade of pink, and the layout of the room was like a shady drive in motel, stained carpet and plastic furniture. The toilet broke two seconds after arriving and we had to call maintenance to fix it.

We left for the gig, laughing at what a dodgy place we'd found ourselves in. Later in the night we arrived back at the hotel a little drunk, and ready for some fun in the spa. As soon as we entered the bathroom we were hit with the unmistakable sound of loud, obnoxious sex thumping through the walls. It pounded through the room and we giggled at the raunchiness of it, and when it stopped suddenly we panicked a little that they'd heard us.

But we just heard chatting coming from the room next door; smoke break. Five seconds later, moaning and screaming. Suddenly, regular conversation. These guys were going from all out, crazy monkey sex to polite conversation in seconds. Eventually we realised; it was porn. They were making porn. This ebb and flow of screaming and orgasms and chit chat continued for HOURS, constantly, until they finally packed up all their equipment in a van at about 4am and went home, after 7 hours of 'hard' work.

I better recognise that room one day.

5. actaeonout got scammed.

This one is more embarrassing than anything--family and I arrive in Hanoi (Vietnam) and grab a taxi from the airport. We already have a hotel picked out, and tell the taxi driver to take us there. We pull up out front, and we see a guy come from what we thought was the hotel to tell us that they're fully booked, but they have a sister hotel right around the corner.

We say whatever, it's late, take us, and end up staying in a crappy hotel (bad plumbing, dimly lit, smelled weird) for a couple days before we wise up and realize that we'd been scammed. We went back to stay at the first hotel, which was very nice, and gorged ourselves on baguettes the whole time. Damn I miss those baguettes.

TL;DR Don't trust random dudes. I do recommend visiting Vietnam though.

6. TheFlyingPolack was drunkenly leaked on.

We noticed water leaking through the ceiling of our room once. We called the front desk to investigate. It turns out some drunk guy passed out naked in the bathtub on the floor above us and his butt was covering the drain creating a flood in his room. Only in Vegas.

7. tre11is took a dump in a sink.

The time I sh*t in the sink.

I was 11, and it was my first time overseas with my family. We'd just landed and I really had to take a dump, but I held it all the way to the hotel.

We arrive, check into our room and I run to the washroom. Now, this was literally a wash room - it just had a sink and faucets. Now I'd heard that bathrooms in France were different, that they had "bidets", but I wasn't sure exactly what a bidet was or what it looked like. I was desperate, I really needed to shit and I figured the sink was the 'bidet' so I hopped up onto it and took a huge dump.

After I was done, I looked down and the reality of the situation hit me. I don't know if you've ever seen a large, long unbroken log of your own shit in a sink - but it's pretty terrifying. Especially with your whole family in the next room. I try to 'flush' it by turning the water on, but that just makes a soup. The drain had that built in cap that you can use to fill it, so it wouldn't drain.

I searched the small room for anything to help, and my eyes landed on the decorative plant. I broke off a plastic branch, and used it as a poking stick to try and break up the poo so it would slide through the small opening. I didn't do much good.

So, being 11...I called my mom. She was pretty good about it - but it was horrifically awkward.

TL;DR: I sh*t in a sink in a hotel, and my mom had to help me clean it up.

8. NikolaTesla1 had an Ants moment.

Undoubtedly the mini fridge incident.

My family had gone to Florida for vacation and were staying in a cheap but relatively nice hotel. After the first three days we noticed they had a mini fridge in the room, so naturally my brother looks inside. Some sick bastard before us had opened two of the soda cans in the fridge and half drank both of them, which placed back in the fridge upside down. After a few days, what seemed like the hotel's entire ant population had swarmed inside the fridge through god knows where.

When my brother opened it, so many came pouring out that it may have looked like a miniscule interpretation of the Killer Ant scene from Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. The fridge was promptly shut, and after my brother's quick shower, we decided we didn't want to stay in the hotel after that night.

9. dabokii had to chop off their hair.

When I was about 7 or 8 my family and I stayed at a motel with a hot tub- my long blond hair got stuck in an uncovered filter and had to be chopped off.

10. DIGGYRULES got bed bugs.

After driving for 10 hours, my husband and I stopped for the night at a Days Inn in South Carolina (dump called "South of the Border"). The hotel door wouldn't close unless you slammed it with all of your strength. The water coming out of the faucets was brown. The towels and washcloths were frayed and had blood stains on them.

We went to bed anyway because we were exhausted and just needed to sleep, but we started itching like crazy in the bed. Bugs. We tried to report it to the front desk, but they didn't care, so we gathered our things and left in the middle of the night.

I tried contacting the management and the head office, but they just e-mailed us back and told us, basically, that it was our loss and not to expect any compensation or even an apology.

11. Three_Act_Show's poor dad was pissing blood.

A coffee plantation and spa in Indonesia. This place was extremely expensive, but in the end it was a disaster. My entire family went to the spa for a few days (we had never spent so much in our lives) and experienced the full terror of this Indonesian Resort.

There were personal baths in each room. Nice right? Think again. The baths were unhygienic, and eventually my father got a bladder infection. Then, we ate their food, and their "fresh" prawns. My father then got food poisoning. After all this, we decided to leave for Jakarta. So we let the hotel escort drive us to the airport, which is a couple of hours away.

My father was already very sick. He had a high fever, a bladder infection, and food poisoning. We were planning to bring him to a doctor as soon as we arrived in Jakarta. But something happened, of course. The driver misheard the hotel's directions (which were correct, we confirmed this later) and brought us to fucking Surabaya. Wanna guess where Surabaya is? Well, it's definitely not Jakarta.

So we return to the resort, and tell them of our woes. They give us a sh*tty room and allow us to stay another day, but they've already done their worst. We're forty hours behind schedule and have missed two connection flights. Now, however, the driver is told that he will get fired (in undeveloped country terms, f*cked up the butt) so my father tries to help him. They allow the driver to stay, and give him a few warnings.

When my father got back to Jakarta, he was pissing blood and in a terrible state. We had to stay there for a few days, in order to help him. That was a terrible hotel experience.

12. StickleyMan woke up to a very drunk British woman.

I was backpacking through Australia, staying in the most budget hostels around. After sharing a room with 23 other people for a week, I decided to splurge on a motel. I really just wanted my own room for one night. The thought of a carefree fap, without having to be covert, was highly enticing.

After falling asleep in a blissful, post-masturbatory haze, I was woken up at 3 in the morning by someone banging on my door. I opened it to find an extremely drunk British chick. She pushed past me, walked into the room, crouched down, and took a piss right in the middle of the floor. Then she passed out in the now-formed small puddle of her own urine. That was a weird night.

13. vesnapukanic got locked into the shower.

Went to a motel while on vacation with an ex. I went to take a shower and locked the bathroom door. When I was done, dried off and ready to go back into the main part of the room the door wouldn't open. My ex had to call the front desk who sent someone up to the room who proceeded to diassemble the doorknob to open the door.

After that they upgraded our room for the evening.

14. designgoddess's friends were covered in roaches.

Friends came to visit me out west. After leaving my place they were headed to the coast. "We're staying in Hollywood!" I tried to warn them. Get a hotel on coast and visit Hollywood during the day. They did not listen. Their travel agent had made all the plans. After a long day of sight seeing they checked into the hotel. It wasn't quite what they expected, but went to sleep anyway. In the middle of the night one friend got up to use the bathroom and turned on the light. Cockroaches everywhere. Hundreds. Maybe thousands.

They covered the walls. They grabbed their things and ran out of the room. While standing in the lobby in their PJs, they tried to make sure they had no cockroaches in their bags or on them. As they walked past the front desk the guy told them that he didn't think they'd make the night. They drove to the coast and found a hotel where I told them to look. When they got home they complained to the travel agent who was shocked that Hollywood wasn't glamorous. Ah, days before the internet.

15. rollerdiscomania was covered in bugs.

Not sure if too late on this one, but eh..

I distinctly remember being around 7-8 and visiting a really beautiful part of Northern Australia with my family, I think somewhere near Kakadu National Park.

Me, my parents, and two siblings were staying in a little cabin, it looked pretty standard, whatever.

As we were initially walking up to the cabin, after picking up the keys and stuff, this little boy around my age walks past me and said to his mum 'They're staying in the one with the bugs'. I remember thinking he was a weirdo, little did I know..

Fast forward a few hours, the sun is gone (it gets particularly dark in the outback), so we switch on the lights in the cabin and hang out. After about 5 minutes of having the lights on, our ENTIRE CABIN is full of bugs! They were EVERYWHERE! they weren't even those annoying little fly-type bugs that hang around lights, they were like every kind of bug I've ever seen/heard of, and massive ones too.

They were on our food, in our hair, in our bags, in the shower, all over the floor and in our beds.

We spent the whole night trying to swat them away, spraying them with mozzie repellant, and being just generally grossed out and miserable. The next morning there were no bugs anywhere, not even little bug corpses from us killing them. Needless to say, we switched cabins the next night, and had a much better time.

TL:DR Attacked by entire bug population of Northern Australia

16. RiverHorsez was showered in sh*t.

I was in Aspen at a lodge about 12 years ago. I was 12 at the time. Great place, super scenic, they had an outdoor heated pool surrounded by snow which was beyond cool.

I went to take a shower after a day of skiing, and halfway through the shower the water turns brown. I freak out and jump out of the shower, grab a towel and tell my mom. she goes into the bathroom and all I hear is "OH MY GOD ITS SHIT! ITS SHIT! THERE IS SHIT EVERYWHERE!"

Yes, indeed the shower I was just in filled with sh*t. The lodge moved us to another room, and didn't even give us a discount.

TL;DR: I had a shitty time at that aspen lodge.

17. 10thDoctorBestDoctor's dad ruined their stay.

My dad stole money from my bank account because he got access to it via my mum and I couldn't pay for my last day there, and I was arguing with him on the phone trying to get him to return what he stole when the police knocked on my door and I was taken away by the police for non payment.

My dad is a d*ck.

18. Barkingpanther doesn't recommend the Days Inn.

Days Inn, Oakland CA. There was a cigarette butt floating in the toilet bowl, even though it was supposed to be a non-smoking room. The bed had a blanket and a sheet but no bottom sheet. The sink was oddly sticky. Oh, and there was a shooting a block away, so we went to sleep with police lights flickering through the curtains. Kind of like a nightlight.

I expect that there will be many, greater tales of terrible hotels but I still want yo put this out there: do not stay at the Days Inn in Oakland California.

19. sheepherder55 listened to the sounds of golf.

I had a motel room that was below a screen golf* place in Korea. These places open all night. So I had the noise of people whacking golf clubs on the floor/ceiling above me. Not an easy night's sleep.

*For the uninitiated it's like a golf simulator; real clubs and balls and you hit the ball at a screen which projects and image of the course.

*But we are initiated, aren't we, Bruce?

20. 4tehlulz had a true winter experience.

Stayed one night in Warwick, Queensland in a cheap motel cabin with a mate. It was the middle of winter and the cabin had thin fibro walls (with the insulation properties of a tent).

The blankets on the beds were completely inadequate and even after we put on every stitch of clothing we'd brought with us, we were still becoming hypothermic.

There was a sh*tty griller in the kitchen area so we turned it on and spent the whole night huddled around it for warmth.

NSFW art is a tradition dating back to the beginning of humanity when cavemen painted nude photos of each other on the walls of caves using charcoal and burned bones. But our cavemen ancestors would likely blush at some of the bizarre, X-rated things that freaks of 2019 ask artists to make for them.

Someone asked "NSFW artists" of Reddit to share "the weirdest commission request" they've received. Here are 20 of the weirdest, wildest examples:

1.) From ansaiego:

After a weird turn of events I was requested to draw a minion burning on a cross with other minions having a blood orgy around it

2.) From lilyinthewoods:

Someone wanted a very realistic, oil painted framed portrait of their dick. The fact that it was a very bad picture of their penis made it weirder. At least take a good photo, bro, if you're willing to spend hundreds of dollars.

3.) From R4zzm4t4zz:

Not even a NSFW Artist but i got asked a few times to draw people or animals in diapers. Also a guy once asked me to draw a famouse german children tv-character called "Die Maus" as a giant just doing giant things. I drew a few options of Maus destroying a city and some other stuff, but he liked my rendition of Maus being used as a diving tower at a small lake by some people. What a weird world we live in.

4.) From usf_edd:

Furry commissions are the secret ingredient for many independent illustrators.

5.) From writermonk:

An art buddy of mine had one of these. Basically it was kind of a reversed mermaid - a fish with tits and legs. He said that the buyer was very specific about certain things. Anyway, my artist bud drew it, delivered it, sold it. Then he did his best to forget about it.

I don't let him forget about it.

6.) From Zunvect:

Fairly often: commission requests for small animals sitting on each others' shoulders under a dress or coat to impersonate a big animal.

7.) From InfestedFistula:

A guy approached me for a commission, he wanted his original character (OC), who was the literal embodiment of the astrological sign Aries, to be giant and crushing a supermarket under his furry ass (he had a human torso and head but goat legs). I was like, sure, fine, not my thing but I can draw it, I need the dough.

Then the dude just ignored all my questions about the picture he supposedly wanted to buy, like the shading method and the perspective, and he just kept rambling about his characters. I got several novel-length private messages about Aries' personality, the tone of his voice, his backstory, his body language... The guy just kept referring to the character as "our boy" and asking shit like, "Do you like that his voice sounds like Ryan Reynolds', uh? Do you find that cute and sexy?? ;)"

He kept ignoring my questions with each new message and doubling down on descriptions that were totally irrelevant to the commission, until he finally revealed what he was after: "Oh, you can make him your own OC. Feel free to draw him a lot and often, he is so cute and sexy." The dude assumed that if he made the character sound enticing to me, I would "adopt him" and regularly draw him for free. It was so fucking dumb, especially since I really wasn't into whatever that character was.

8.) From Back2Bach:

A (watercolor) painting commissioned by a woman's husband of her lying on a "day bed" in a negligee, with a ceramic bowl of grapefruit, bananas, lemons, and grapes on an adjacent stand.

It was a gift to her for their 10th wedding anniversary.

9.) From VariShari:

Ok so I’m not strictly a NSFW artist but here goes:

• one time I got paid a big extra sum to also make a NSFW version of the painting he commissioned. I figured the money was worth it since I have no dignity and just adding a boner and an ahegao face to what was unfortunately a Pokemon wouldn’t be too bad. When he got the finished product he was so happy and then shared his entire public NSFW folder of his two Pokémon characters with me and I really don’t know what to do with the information that this guy has spent at least 1000$ on greninja and Decidueye porn. Not proud of it but oh well, bought a new game from the money so I don’t regret it.

• One Person requested that I design and draw a Pokemon OC for them (I started my commissions in the Pokemon community since people love getting pics of their trainer or their Pokémon mascot). Created the character and sent it to them. Few weeks later they added me on Twitter, and oh boy, their twitter page was plastered with anal Vore and Giant fetish art featuring the character they got from me. Oof

• person asked me to draw a Weavile wearing a bow tie back when I was getting started and doing sketch requests out of boredom. He then DMd me and in great detail explained how he had a fetish for big claws and bows. Like ok have your fetishes but I just really don’t want to know about them

10.) From healmehealme:

I haven’t gotten anything too outrageous. I’ve had people contact me trying to push the limits of what I’m comfortable drawing.

A guy asked me to draw dick nipple, sucks getting extremely stretched out, nipples opening and sucking off a dick...all really weird stuff.

He kept asking how far I was willing to go with gore and the like.

He ended up insulting my work and backing out though. Pretty sure he was just a troll trying to see if he could make me seem really desperate for the cash. Not that I’m not. I totally would’ve done it for the right price.

11.) From Portarossa:

I write smut for a living, and I've always been pretty open with the commissions I take. Sometimes you can just tell that the person has no intention of actually paying for it and they just want to tell someone else their fantasies. One time, though, I got a message from someone who seemed genuinely very nice and who didn't set off any red flags in that respect. He (quite bashfully) asked for a story about being sounded by a Hot Wheels car. He wanted the first part of the story to be about how it would stretch his dickhole going in, and the second part to be all about the damage the wing mirrors would do to his urethra as it was pulled slowly out.

YKINMKBYKIOK and all that, but I politely declined the commission. I didn't need the money as badly as I needed to not spend a few hours picturing that.

12.) From AlanTheMexican:

I was SEMI NSFW and the weirdest one I got was a character from Total Drama (Bridgette) having her feet locked up and then another character from the same show (Izzy) licking them like there was no tomorrow. And that same person asked for 2 other comissions from me.

Thought I had it "weird" until I read this thread. Holy shit I got it easy

13.) From Morilicious:

Some older guy wanted me to draw a female with lower body as an octopus with teeth, having sex with a guy while his pp is getting chewed.

I was okay until he started to ask very personal questions to me so i noped. 3 years later he starts to stalk me. Luckily I'm moving to another country soon.

14.) From skulldir:

Not an nsfw artist but my friend is an artist, and was asked by two other friends (both straight men) to draw a picture of them spit roasting another friend (also a straight man) to give to him as a welcome back present (we went to college across the country, his family moved there and he was visiting the following summer).

15.) From DuggieBoy:

I was a tattoo artist, for awhile. A 17 year old girl wanted "EVIL ASS" tattooed on her ass. Being 17, she needed parental consent, so I had to handle this girl's ass while trying to force a normal conversation with her father. Not "weird," exactly, but seriously awkward and uncomfortable...

16.) From skanksmcoy:

Sculpted a 14 inch long 5 inch thick dilldo with a ribcage wrapped around it for an adult toy company. They never released it and I'm still a little salty

17.) From bunkerbash:

I did a frog wearing a strap on black dildo in a posh Victorian room for a friend.

Update- messaged her and asked if she could snap a picture of him. here ya go

18.) From sineptnaig:

A baby human-fox hybrid paw showing from the inside of the belly of a pregnant fox girl...

19.) From twistedbanshee:

Not a NSFW artist but I did alot of weird requests as a teen when I was learning to draw. Inflation erotica and baby fur were high of the wtf meter.

20.) From sunreyess:

Not me- but I saw something about a tattoo artist who was asked to tattoo this girls full vagina on her boyfriend. The girl was sitting there completely spread eagle while the artist tried to draw her heeha onto this man. WITH OTHER PEOPLE IN THE PARLOR. EVERYWHERE.

Are you in the right headspace to receive funny jokes right now?

This week gifted us with multiple new joke formats, one impeachment hearing, and approximately 525,600 Baby Yoda memes. Here are some great tweets from women, all of whom you should be following (on Twitter, not in real life. That would be creepy).

1. Survival of the fittest.

2. Thirty, flirty, and thriving.

3. You feel, how does it make?

4. As charming as Charmin.

5. I can see clearly now.

6. More accurate than the Sorting Hat.

7. Premium content.

8. How the sausage is made.

9. Yup, that pretty much sums it up.

10. Who would ever do such a prepostorous thing?

11. Degrassi was......de greatest.

12. I want to go to there.

13. The ultimate mashup.

14. Baby Yoda is the new Cousin Greg.

15. Those were the days.

In Hollywood, there's a culture of working for free to "pay your dues" or working for gratis because it's a supposedly great "opportunity." It's a bullshit culture, but nonetheless, people continue to participate in it and work for free.

However when a producer approached a friend and asked him if he knew any backup dancers that would dance in a music video for a supposedly "well known artist" for free, the friend put the producer on blast in the best way.

The producer explained that there was no pay for the gig, but that the dancers would "get a lot of exposure" and called it a great "networking opportuity" that would lead to a "shit ton of $$$$ on the future!!!" Sure, Jan.

The friend clarified the producer's ask for free work and point blank asked him if he's "looking for naive and vulnerable young people to exploit for free labor on his music video." He also called out the hypocrisy of filming at a "famous artists house" with "expensive filming equipment" but having none left over to pay the dancers.

The producer protested saying that this was "common" and the friend asked him to pay the dancers with his own money, citing his "paintball gun collection" and his purebred pitbull as evidence that he can afford to pay the dancers.

The exchange ended with the producer threatening the friend's career and the friend's triumphant clapback of "That's how trying to bullshit people smarter then you works. You lie and then I trap you."

Naturally, the comment section had a lot to say about paying someone in "exposure." Some even wanted the original poster to expose the producer's name — no point in protecting a predator.

And on that note, if you hire someone — pay them. Nobody can pay their bills by "getting ur name and face out there."

“Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened.”
― Anatole France

Honestly, my life was completely empty before I got a dog. Now it's so full (of pet hair.) I kid, I kid. My dog is my life. Whatever kind of pet you have, you will enjoy these hilariously adorable animal memes. They perfectly nail what it's like to have a crazy little fur baby live in your home.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

22.

23.

"The purpose of our lives is to be happy."

-Dalai Lama​​

If you want to be happy, look no further than this meme list. These hilariously random memes will put a smile on your face and make your day a whole lot better.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

22.

23.

24.

25.

If you like laughing, you'll love these memes. They are silly, funny, and pretty much guaranteed to make your morning more fun.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

22.

23.

24.

Being famous seems like it would be all red carpets and caviar, but more and more celebrities are confessing that it's not always easy.

Chrissy Teigen spent about 90 minutes last night answering fan questions about what it's really like to be a celebrity. She got candid about the perks and the crappy parts.

Chrissy started with a photo proving that despite her celeb status, she has a junk drawer to rival any normie's.

She quipped that she has "an awesome life and zero life," which is half relatable!

And that she feels "stuck."

She thinks everyone's mad at her.

The biggest truth bomb was about air travel.

We're gonna need some more details on this one stat. Chrissy didn't elaborate, but if you're curious, ans think they found the service:

And she admitted that she lives in perpetual fear of cancellation.

She does buy her own clothes, then she re-sells them and donates the cash.

Chrissy admitted she'll shamelessly drop her name when making a restaurant reservation (who wouldn't?).

She wouldn't name names, but she said most celebrities are actually pretty nice.

We really are gonna need these names, Chrissy.

The more famous a person is, the nicer they are.

When she does a TV appearance, she has one weird request on her rider.

She has four — count' em, four — nannies

Plus a household manager all day every day. Can you imagine?!

Her life hack is to hire them away from agents, who can be notoriously demanding.

And junk mail is simply not in her life.

Surprisingly, she and John Legend didn't pay cash for their home.

Her famous Twitter feed is not the result of a social media manager — although her publicist does have some oversight.

And although she seems to let it all hang out, there's actually tons of stuff she wishes she could tweet about.

The Legend-Teigen household is also full of free crap, which Chrissy donates.

Chrissy doesn't mind the red carpet, partially because she used to interview people herself.

And her favorite celeb perk is that people accept her kids' airplane tantrums.

She says the paparazzi are actually nice to her kids.

And to her, because "it's a job."

Chrissy feels guilty turning down jobs.

She went over the etiquette of fans meeting her in public.

Huggers don't bother her too much because she's a hugger herself.

And she'd rather you come out and ask for a photo than loom nearby giggling nervously.

Vacationing can be rough because paparazzi will turn up on their holidays.

She only really goes out in public once a month.

She says award shows aren't all they're cracked up to be. We'll take your ticket next time, Chrissy!

Her friends are a mix of showbiz people, employees and ball-busters.

And when it comes to famous friends, bringing up gossip is a big no-no.

But it sounds like making friends as a famous person is even more awkward than usual.

She admitted she wouldn't have met her husband, John Legend, if she wasn't in the modeling industry.

And that she feels guilty about the money. We'll take some of it off her hands??

After 90 minutes of interrogation, Chrissy called it quits.

Childbirth can be rough — and sometimes tough decisions have to be made.

One mom has asked the internet to weigh in on a tough question.

"[Am I the a-hole] For telling my husband that if he had to choose between my self and my daughter during birth to choose me?" she asked.

Her story is serious, so buckle up.

She developed gestational diabetes at 32 weeks "due to [...] being overweight," she wrote. Her OB-GYN scheduled a C-section, and then:

[B]efore going in to the hospital I talked with my husband that if something where to happened and he needed to choose between myself and our baby to please choose me. He got quiet but said that he agreed and that please let me mother know about what we talked.

The birth was fine, mother and baby came out unscathed. But now she's trying to get pregnant again and in case of emergency, she asked her husband to honor the same agreement.

She brought this up at a gathering of mom friends and it didn't go over great:

I said that I do want another baby and that pregnancy doesn’t scare me such as giving birth again. I said that I straight told my husband again that I’m scared that something may happened to me during the birth and in the hopes of giving my daughter a sibling I could leave her without a mother. That the original agreement stands that he needs to choose me if that’s the case.

When she explained her mom-over-baby policy, her friends freaked out:

My friends where disgusted with my thinking and said that i was an asshole to my husband in asking him to basically kill his baby (those where the exact words), that I was a very negative person and that I needed to rethink my thoughts. I’m a person that likes to be prepared for the worse case scenario and hope for the best. I didn’t want my husband to be blindsided with who to choose and to have the answer on the spot. Nobody likes to think in what could go wrong specially in a pregnancy but I need to think every possible case that we could encounter.

While it's a tough call, people largely agree that this mom isn't an a-hole for thinking this way.

PrometheusMadLad summed it up:

it's your f*cking life. You can make another baby, there can't be another you. Also, if your Husband agreed, it's none of their buisness

Others, like vvousmevoyez, agreed that the entire family would suffer without a mom:

Exactly. A widow father with 2 kids will have a lower quality of life than a healthy mother and father with just 1 child. I’m not looking down on single fathers by the way! I just think the family would be happier if the mother was alive. They can choose to have future kids but they can’t choose to bring the mother back to life if she dies.

And boudicas-shield made another interesting point:

Also, and more importantly, the mother (OP) is a human whose life is full and rich and has value outside what her existence would do for her husband and children. It’s perfectly acceptable for OP to live because she doesn’t want to die in childbirth, not just because men and children would be better served by her not being dead.

Women are full humans who deserve to be considered as humans in their own right, not just what they mean to their husbands and children.

Not everyone agreed with the mom.

Some, like DaveyDukes, implied it was irresponsible to have another potentially risky pregnancy where gestational diabetes is a possibility — even though plenty of moms who aren't clinically overweight can develop GD:

this is not a typical mother not wanting to martyr for her child situation. This is a- mother is an unhealthy weight and is choosing to still go for another baby despite almost guaranteed health risks for mother and baby. How is everyone overlooking this selfish decision?

Henrywinkelred agreed:

You’re making the choice to bring this person into the world. You’ve lived, loved, had adventures. And you want to deny them the same experiences so you can have more?

But thankfully, it's unlikely the husband will ever have to make this decision. Usually, this would be in the hands of doctors.

Medical professionals are on her side, according to Daytripsinsidecars:

Doctors will make this decision for you anyway.

OBGYNS save mother first. Baby second.

And FallaciousCrumb:

When a pregnant woman arrests, we do four rounds of CPR, and then we do a perimortem caesarian section. The purpose of this is not to save the baby, but to save the woman, because pregnancy puts a massive strain on a woman's body. If the baby makes it, that's an added bonus, but this is not the purpose of the caesarian section.

Mother before baby, always.

If you aren't caught up on all the drama surrounding the latest Peloton bike commercial, I'm worried about you.

Peloton released a commercial featuring a young, thin, gorgeous mom who receives an exercise bike for Christmas which is already a pretty rude gift. We'll give Peloton the benefit of the doubt and assume she asked for it because her excitement about this bike is really over the top. Over the course of the 25 second commercial, the woman looks incredibly uncomfortable about her interactions with her new bike. The ad ends with the woman giving her husband a video montage of her using the bike and thanking him for how much she has "changed." Naturally, the internet went ahead and assumed the change was regarding her love for her husband that told her to exercise for Christmas.

Of course, people had a lot to say. Most of the feedback was negative and some of it was just confused. Why is she so scared? Why is this couple so terrible at getting each other Christmas gifts? Did she really just give her husband a video blog and did they really just watch it together? Is her daughter ok? How exactly did she "change?" The actress, Monica Ruiz, now nicknamed "Peloton girl," told Deadline:

"I was happy to accept a job opportunity earlier this year from Peloton and the team was lovely to work with. Although I’m an actress, I am not quite comfortable being in spotlight and I’m terrible on social media. So to say I was shocked and overwhelmed by the attention this week (especially the negative) is an understatement."

While the ad was going viral for all the wrong reasons, Ryan Reynolds saw an opportunity to promote his new gin, Aviation. I'm not exactly sure why every celebrity needs a career in Hollywood and a line of liquor, but this was a pretty genius marketing move.

Ruiz commented:

"When Ryan and his production team called about Aviation Gin, they helped me find some humor in the situation. I am grateful to both Peloton and now Aviation Gin for the work and giving me the opportunity to do what I love to do.” .

This ad is the absolute perfect response. It's funny without the Peloton context, but if you consider the Peloton commercial as this woman's backstory, it's even funnier. "Hey, my husband gave me an exercise bike for Christmas and then I made him a ridiculous video and he still doesn't understand. Should we get drinks? A lot of drinks?" It's also a great follow-up to this viral parody:

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

Thanks for the laugh, Ryan and Monica!

One of the most disorienting aspects of grief is navigating all the moments you want to reach out to your loved one who is no longer there. At times, the reality of their death doesn't reassert itself until you've already crafted a one-way text conversation, or added them to the invite list for an event and felt it all hit.

While there are few feelings that match the sharp pain in your chest that forms when you are reminded a loved one is gone, purposefully writing a letter to a loved one who passed away serves as a helpful outlet for the complex web of grief.

In a recent Twitter thread, the writer Rax King shared that she's been writing her dad's work email ever since he died. The emails include messages about how she misses him, stories about current events in her life, passing thoughts she would have shared when he was alive, and requests for "ghost advice."

Up until now, King wrote these emails with the assumption that no one was reading them. But a recent email received a heartfelt response from one of her dad's coworkers, who revealed they have seen the emails coming in but avoided reading them for privacy's sake.

The response email read:

"Hi, I'm sure you remember me. I want you to know I never read these emails because I can tell they are very personal. But I do see them coming in and I can see that you must still miss your dad terribly. I want you to know that he loved you more than anything. Watching the two of you together wisecracking, razzing each other, cursing each other out, it was obvious that you were cut from the exact same cloth. It was like watching a Mel Brooks movie."

"I know that my memories can't replace what you had with your dad. It was so special that you were able to have such a close relationship. Not everybody has that with their dad. But I hope it is a comfort to you that the people in your father's life (goofballs like me) loved the two of you together as much as you loved each other."

King shared that the email took her by surprise and hit her straight in the gut.

Her frank discussion of grief opened up the thread to others who expressed their condolences and also shared how they handle the losses in their lives.

The internet can be such a dismal place at times, and social media can often make us feel more isolated than surrounded, so it's nice when it can be used as a tool for genuine connection and processing.

Sometimes people forget what decade, and century for that matter, we are living in. This isn't the 1950s, we don't need a man's permission to buy a car, go to work, or make choices that do not involve them.

Ladies of Reddit are sharing their cringe-inducing, laughable, and hair-raising stories of being told they should first ask their husbands (or boyfriends) for permission before making a decision.

1. One doctor is more concerned about how TakoyakiTanu's husband will feel about her post-cancer scar.

I had a cancerous mole on my scalp, the options were to leave it be as it was slow growing, or cut it out.

My doctor literally said “you know you will have a scar there right? How does your husband feel about that?”

Let me tell you how fucking fast I switched doctors.

My fucking husband would be ok if I was bald like fucking kip from futurama. IT'S FUCKING CANCER

2. A car dealership doubts a Snowdrift430's ability to make the purchase without input from her boyfriend.

When I bought my current car, I made the mistake of mentioning I had a male partner.

One car salesman I dealt with asked me about four times to get my boyfriend’s permission. The first time he mentioned it, I brushed it off by clarifying that I was buying this car, with my money, not my SO. But he kept bringing it up. “Have you asked your boyfriend about this?” “Do you know what your boyfriend wants?” And every time, I told him some variation of: my boyfriend is not involved, this isn’t his money, he does not care about cars.

Finally, the last time he was like “well why don’t you come back with your boyfriend?” I almost lost it. I didn’t get mad or yell or anything, but I just stared at him and I was like “dude, for the last time, my boyfriend is not a part of this decision. He doesn’t give a shit about cars, he’s not paying for this car, and you are dealing with ME, not my boyfriend.”

Needless to say I ended up buying a car elsewhere.

3. It turns out, dealerships are repeat offenders, as Alzayz's story shows. ​​​​​​

I knew the exact model of the car i wanted, so i went to the dealership with my husband to check it out (i checked to make sure they had the model i was looking for, and everything). my husband was totally just chilling, he really only tagged along to drive me there (in case i bought the car and drove it home). it was pretty clear that he did not give a fuck about what was going on -- he was literally sitting in the corner working on his laptop -- but the salesman kept asking him things, like "oh, well what do you think?" or "is that something you're looking for?"

my husband kept saying "she's the one buying it" and "it's her car, i don't care" but the guy kept pushing. finally my husband just left to go work on his laptop in his car, because this dude was so annoying. i didn't end up buying the car from them, even though they were the only dealership in the area that had the model i was looking for. i drove to a dealership in the bay area instead (i live in LA...so, about 350 miles away) and bought the car there.

4. A stylist doesn't want Katgib13​​​​​​ chopping off her hair without thinking of her partner's feelings first.

When I first started going to my stylist, I wanted my long hair cut into a short bob. She asked if my husband was ok with it. She's had SO's come in and yell at her for cutting hair off. Holy hell. I assured her that my husband has zero say in how I choose to wear my hair.

5. A petite Gladmedium was questioned if she could finish the dessert she planned to order.

I went out with my ex to an ice cream/dessert parlour. I'm a pretty small size, gym regularly, etc etc, and I was starving and wanted a damn waffle. Ordered the most ridiculous thing I could find on the menu. Server looked at my ex and went "are you okay with her ordering that?" D U D E

6. A doctor consulted Yourcoloriwonder's husband about getting her off birth control so she could give him children, without asking her first.

I was at a routine check up and my husband at the time came along. They asked what medications I was on and I verbally listed birth control. The doctor switched his gaze to my ex and asked if he wanted kids. My ex said yes and the doctor asked if he'd like to talk about easing me off birth control so I could have kids. My ex said yeah, sure. I had to tell the doctor that I was still in the room and didn't want to ease off my birth control considering we were in marriage counseling for my ex cheating a week after the marriage he insisted on. The doctor said we obviously needed to talk and left us to talk. I set my ex straight and ended up not getting off birth control, but instead switching to an IUD.

7. A video game store manager can't believe ZestyChickenMuffin, a girl gamer, has her own account independent of her husband.

Was in a popular video game store and my account had expired. I tell the guy at the counter that I need to renew my account and I give him my number. He doesn’t punch anything in and asks me “what’s your husbands name?”. And I’m immediately angry.

I tell him “I gave you the phone number” Guy “but it’s easier by name” Me “my name is .......” Guy doesn’t type anything again. Guy “I need the name of the account holder” Me “I am the account holder” Guy “Ma’am, I’m not trying to be rude but I can’t look it up by a secondary name. It needs to be the accounts main name”

I stare at him. Me “do you have a manager available?” Guy “I am the manager” Me “what part of ‘I am the account holder’ did you not understand? Are you purposefully being sexist or is this some kind of a joke?”

8. Antisocialite-, a female bartender, got pushback about her job and how it affects her boyfriend.

A LOT of men have proudly declared to me that they would NEVER let "their woman" be a bartender. Men asked me aaaaall the time what my boyfriend thinks about it. Uhhhhh he likes that I have a job??

My favorite is when a guy followed that with, "because I know the messed up things I say to women when I'm drunk!"

9. Donating eggs without a man's consent proved a headache for Missriri. ​​​​

I was looking into donating my eggs years ago. The clinic wouldn’t even see me without my partner present, not even for a general information session. It was also a requirement that he signed a form giving his consent for me to proceed with any discussions, and I was given zero autonomy.

The same clinic, however, accepted semen samples from any male at any time with no partner involvement whatsoever. And the icing on the cake, they paid men for their samples while women weren’t allowed to “profit from their eggs”.

10. 384ChubbyDumpling's bisexuality was called into question by a nurse looking to get her partner's thoughts.

I disclosed my bisexuality at a routine sexual health checkup, to which the nurse replied "What does your boyfriend think of that?" I was single at the time.

She then proceeded to lecture me that if I wasn't so promiscuous (I've had sex with a total of 3 people in my entire life) I wouldn't need to be there, and that my future boyfriend wouldn't like that I've been with so many people. I didn't manage to get a word in during this entire 3 minute tirade

11. Bringing her computer in for repair got Drlitt frozen out as the employee only addressed her male partner.

I was at a computer repair shop for my laptop. My partner (male) came with (he is way more techy than me so I figured he could tell if I was being ripped off just in case), but he stayed nearer to the back of the store looking at computers. Guess who the computer store guy talked to? Was it the woman who was actually speaking to him, standing right in front of his counter and holding the laptop she wanted fixed? Nope, he was basically yelling across the store to my partner. I would ask a question, he would yell the answer to my boyfriend.....

And then later that week when the computer guy messed up and we went in to speak to him, he had the nerve to tell my boyfriend I was being "emotional" when I called him out for shady business practices.... Their store closed down so I win.

12. Pokesminnie's boss wanted to make sure her husband was okay with her promotion to full-time employee.

When I was being promoted from intern to full time at my current job, my boss asked me if “I was sure my husband was ok with this”. It was crazy to me to think 1) that my husband would ever be mad at me for getting a full time job and 2) why it was a prerequisite in her mind that I get his permission.

13. Statusquosinner's sister had a run in with a moving company refusing to talk to her or her wife, preferring to speak to a man.

This didn’t happen to me, but happened to my sister and her wife when they moved from Tennessee to Maryland about 10 years ago.

They used a local Tennessee moving company to pack up and moved their stuff. When they got to Maryland, they found that a bunch of stuff had been pretty decently damaged, and that it was obvious their belongings hadn’t been packed right by the movers. So my sister called the company to complain and see if they could get a small amount knocked off their bill for the damages.

The owner refused to give her any sort of discount...and asked to speak to her husband. Because, as he said, “Women are just not rational about money.” My sister responded, “Excuse me? I don’t have a husband; I have a wife, and if you’d like to speak to her that’s fine, but she’ll say the same thing I’m saying.” The owner then asked her if she was a Christian, at which point my sister hung up, called the Better Business Bureau, and they compensated her and her wife for the damages.

14. Melbell518 wanted to by hobby supplied, but the cashier felt it was too costly a purchase to make on her own.

My husband and I have a rule: if the purchase is over $500, we need to discuss it. Anything under is fair game, HOWEVER, since I’m the only one that routinely buys large dollar amount items, I will try to run it by him prior to making the purchase if it’s over $150. So, I was making a quilt for a friend, went to the store and spent $200. The cashier asked me if my husband is ok with me spending that kind of money. Fabric is fucking expensive. I explained our rule and walked out. Too bad it was the only decent shop in the area for quilting fabric.

15. M-b12's family thought she should wait to get her tattoo to get input from her future husband.

When I got my first tattoo, everyone in my family would say things like “what if your future husband doesn’t like tattoos?” “Men don’t like tattoos and piercings!” “You’re never going to find a man that finds you beautiful, you’re ruining yourself!” It was so gross!

16. Humangarbag3's mortgage company called, but wanted to wait and speak with her husband.

Recently, my mortgage company called me several times in a row and when I finally answered, the rep said, “Why don’t you talk to the husband and call us back?”
I said, “Why would I hang up and call back?”
He said, “Well, I’m not the person who handles this type of account so why don’t you talk to your husband and have him call us back.”
“Why would I tell my husband, who knows nothing about refinancing, that you’re not the person to talk to, and then have him, who knows nothing about refinancing, call you back, who can’t help us with the mortgage I set up?”
“Umm I guess I could transfer you right now.”
“Yes, you can.”

17. Hemehime's co-workers thought her opinion on kids was more dependent on what her husband would decide. Problematic on many levels, including the fact she is a lesbian.

When I was new at a previous job, some of the older employees were chatting with me and asking about my life. One of them asked if I had kids or wanted them. I said no to both, and she smiled and said "oh, but does your husband want kids? That's what the deciding factor is," and winked at me. I think she was trying to be playful or weirdly sexy, but still, gross. I was also not married at the time, but I was still a lesbian.

18. A neighbor of My_fruity_lexia's wanted to borrow a piece of household equipment, but not from her.

I recently had a neighbour come knock on my door... (holding a broken metal bracket)

"uhh, hi... is your husband home?"

no, I'm not married

"oh, uhh, is your boyfriend or the man of the house here?" (I have a boyfriend and a 6'5" son)

agitated NO, this is MY house, I pay the bills here

"uhhh. um do they have a welder I can borrow?"

FFS dude, why couldn't you just ask that in the first place?!!?

19. Anntilathehun's Uber driver couldn't believe she was allowed to move to a new state without approval from her partner.

When I first moved to Chicago, I had an uber driver who was making small talk with me, and after I mentioned that I had moved from Kentucky only like a week prior, he goes “all the way from Kentucky? Your boyfriend let you do that?” Baffling because I had not mentioned a boyfriend and did not have one, but I still said “my boyfriend doesn’t let or not let me do ANYTHING.”

20. One of KlvrDissident's co-workers couldn't believe her husband, who eats kosher, permits her to decide her own diet.

I was out eating with coworkers. One of them eats Halal and was describing some of the rules they follow. My husband is Jewish and keeps kosher, so I remarked how many of the rules are similar. We talked briefly about how I keep a kosher kitchen, but since I’m not Jewish I’ll indulge in non-Kosher cravings when we eat out.

He looks me right in the eye and says incredulously, “And your husband lets you eat like that?”

Good lord, the fire burst from my lips so fast the whole table cringed. “My husband doesn’t let me do anything. I don’t have to ask permission for anything, thankyouverymuch.”

21. Megustavdouche's wanted to join the Marine Corps and the recruiter decided to only address her husband during the process.

I was trying to join the Marine Corps. My husband is a Marine. The recruiter called me when I was out with my husband and asked me to come in so I brought him. The whole time the recruiter didn’t even LOOK at me. Referred to me as “she” and talked to my husband about everything. I did call him out on it, I don’t remember the outcome but it made me so angry.

Hopefully we can get these out-of-touch folks up to speed and into the 21st century, where they can feel comfortable talking to women about purchases, lifestyle choices, health, and everyday basic decisions that women are more than qualified to make independently.

5. Emilia Clarke, because she's being punished this awards season for Daenerys's war crimes.

Unless your name is David Benioff or D.B. Weiss, odds are that you were disappointed with the Game of Thrones finale. The team attempted to wrap up seven years of story in just six episodes, leaving dozens of plotlines unresolved and abandoning character development like it's one of Craster's incest babies.

While the Emmy Awards still felt inclined to give Game of Thrones awards for being Game of Thrones, the Golden Globes are way less generous.

The show wasn't nominated for Best Drama Series, which is completely understandable. Fans are pissed, however, that Emilia Clarke and her expert face acting were left out. We know that the Globes do recall the existence of the show because Kit Harington was nominated for Best Actor. Kit Harington, who spent the entire season pouting and saying "she's my QUEEN."

Daenerys deserved a more detailed descent into fascist madness, but that's not Clarke's fault. Awards season is dark and full of errors.

4. Marianne Williamson, because Trump hasn't pardoned Charles Manson...yet.

Presidential candidate Marianne Williamson is giving hope to little girls everywhere that they too can grow up to spread conspiracy theories, granted they haven't died from a preventable disease because people like Williamson told their parents not to vaccinate them.

The aspiring crackpot-in-chief took to Twitter last night to share her dismay over Donald Trump's posthumous presidential pardon of his fellow cult leader Charles Manson, a thing that did not happen.

There's no need to make up new controversies—Trump has done dozens of terrible things. Enough terrible things that people see headlines like "Trump Pardons Charles Manson" and don't immediately assume it's a dumb lie.

The headline came from a site called "Moron Majority," which makes Williamson's gullibility a little (a lot) on the nose.

Williamson later corrected the record, writing, "I erroneously tweeted that President Trump had posthumously pardoned Charles Manson. Glad [sic] To have been wrong."

Is She gLad she's wrong about Capitalization, too?

3. Republican impeachment attorney Steve Castor, because he sucks at his job.

If the impeachment inquiry into Donald Trump's attempt to bribe Ukraine taught us one thing, it's how to pronounce "Kyiv." And if it taught us a second thing, it's that Republican subservience to Trump it's that people who sign up to work for Donald Trump ain't the sharpest tools in the shed.

The House Judiciary Committee hosted a hearing today to discuss the evidence collected on Trump's behavior towards Ukraine. While Democrats were focused on Trump's behavior, Republicans focused on the Democrats' behavior.

Republicans' lawyer takes his job so seriously, he showed up to his televised hearing with his notes in a reusable shopping bag. He hadn't appeared to have read his grocery binders, because multiple times, the Democrats' lawyer had to explain to him facts about his own report.

Democratic counsel Barry Berke cited a testimony in which a Pence aide said that she viewed Trump's request to get dirt on Joe Biden as "political in nature."

"Did you leave that out of your report: yes or no?" Berke asked. After fumbling around for an answer, Berke said, "I'm telling you you did," to which Castor shrugged and said "okay," and the hearing room erupted in laughter.

It's likely not ideal for the Republicans that their chosen counsel has become the hearing's comic relief, but it's definitely fun for watchers of C-SPAN.

2. Liam Hemsworth, because Miley Cyrus is subtweeting him with a tattoo.

There's passive-aggressive, and then there's tattoo-aggressive. Miley Cyrus got "Freedom" tattooed above her knuckles, and people can't help but wonder if it's about her divorce.

Tattoo artist Daniel Winter posted the pic to his Instagram, and it's the opposite of subtle.

She's just being Miley.

1. Jimmy.

Congratulations to Denver Area Man Jimmy, who is going to be a father, whether he likes it or not.

Sports reporter Ryan S. Clark shared a picture of a pregnant woman at the Denver Airport with a sign saying "JIMMY its [sic] your baby, you can't ignore me forever." The scandal is more than just the woman's use of "its" rather than the proper contraction "it's."

Jimmy, please report to departures to board your plane directly to Maury Povich's studio.

Discussing money in romantic relationships can be pretty challenging sometimes.

If you loan your significant other money, the best mentality is probably to just assume you won't get it back. That way, if you get it back it's a nice surprise and if you don't, you're not going to be disappointed or resentful. Unless, of course, it's a massive amount of money and then maybe you should get a lawyer involved. Treating people you love to dinners, vacations or other gifts is a nice gesture and keeping tabs on every penny isn't always healthy for every relationship.

That being said, if you do make an agreement with your partner to lend money and get it back, is it ever a good idea to forgive that loan as a birthday gift? This is the exact problem that a woman on Reddit's (Am I the As*hole) found herself in. Probably should've sprung for the Airpods...

AITA for wiping my girlfriends debt away as a birthday present?

Hi,

Wondering if I'm in the wrong here. I thought I was being generous. My girlfriend has owed me some $ for a while - about $400 for a flight and car repair I paid for for her. I did so under the pretenses that it was a loan, not a gift, and that I expected to be paid back. We're pretty fair and usually rotate paying for dinner/etc unless it's a special occasion (birthday, holiday, etc) in which case I pay in full. It's important to note that we've been dating for about 10 months, and we're not at the point in our relationship where we share finances. I'm not exactly broke but I'm not rich either. I asked her, nicely, about two months ago whether she was going to be able to pay me back and she was adamant that she would. I mentioned it again about a month ago and she told me not to worry and that she would pay me back.

For her birthday, she mentioned that she wanted the new Airpods Pro - I didn't once ever make her believe that I was getting them for her, it was just something she had mentioned a few times in passing. Her birthday rolls around, and I took her out to a nice fancy dinner and got her flowers and a card. As her "gift", I decided to wipe her debt away. It was starting to drive a wedge between us and I didn't want it to be hanging over the both of us going forward, as I intend to be with her for a while. She was pissed about this, and told me that it isn't a gift and I'm an asshole for even considering it. Am I in the wrong here? I genuinely thought I was doing something nice, and $400 is much more than I would have spent on a gift. Let me know if I'm wrong.

Thanks,

Edit: lots of people messaging me saying I’m a terrible boyfriend and that a man should support a woman financially. First of all, no. Second of all, I’m a woman and we are lesbians. I should’ve been more explicit about that but I didn’t think it was material to the situation.

Forgiving debt is definitely a nice gesture--it seems to me like her girlfriend is being a little ungrateful. Plus, a nice dinner, flowers and a card is already a gift. At least it's better than a Peloton bike...

Naturally, the internet weighed in...

"beargrowlz" wrote:

Mmm, NAH. Maybe a soft YTA (You're the As*hole), but you didn't mean to be. I think if I were in your girlfriend's position I would have preferred a conversation ahead of time: "hey gf, I was thinking that as a birthday gift I'd wipe the 400 you owe me, and we can go out for a nice dinner to celebrate. What do you think?"

Some people like practical gifts and some people like emotional gifts. Some people would see that as a great gift, and some people would see it as a punishment for being in debt. People's relationships with money are weird and unpredictable, and in my opinion you shouldn't try to surprise somebody when it comes to significant financial matters.

"Rahvithecolorful" wrote:

She asked for the new AirPods, though. She wanted an expensive and specific gift. She clearly values monetary and practical value in gifts. If she hadn't said anything about Airpods, I'd completely agree with you.
That said, some people still think that gifts have to be actual physical gifts no matter what, so it's still a point. Not the best thing to surprise someone with unless you know them really well.

"bologna_homie" wrote:

some life advice... in the future never consider giving money to friends or family as a loan. Think of it as a gift and something you will never get back.

"Rhynegains" wrote:

Look, she's greedy and shady, yes. But not really an asshole here. You two didn't set up a payment plan or anything - so she saw no deadline for paying you back. While not great, that's just how some people think.

Birthdays are times for thoughtfulness and gifts. Not Airpods or anything like that. The flowers were nice and so was the card... but you didn't actually give her anything she could keep long. Like even a nice stuffed animal or something. I'm not saying anything expensive, just something that isn't going to be a burden in a few days.

Clearing the debt wasn't really a gift, just something bothering you that you decided to get rid of. You pulled up that sore spot during her birthday. Not a good idea.

When you loan someone money, you need to set an actual repayment schedule with them. You didn't. Then made her birthday about the debt. It wasn't nice, just brought up a sore spot in the day she's supposed to feel good.

Her reaction is a red flag and wanting Airpods is a big no. But those aren't really her being TA just her being someone I wouldn't have any interest in dating.

In the future - don't make someone's special event about what they owed you. Not a good play. Tackle that subject outside of events and special occasions.

"ShelfLifeinc" wrote:

A birthday is not a time for doing "practical gifts" unless the birthday person SPECIFICALLY requests it. A birthday is not a time to clear someone's debt, replace their tyres, clean their gutters, or buy extra disc space for their computer (ahem, ahem, my future husband).

If you didn't want to buy her a present outside of taking her out for a fancy dinner and getting her flowers, fine. But these are things to make her valued and cared for. Clearing her debt isn't a present, it's a show-off: "I cleared your debt to me to show you what a good person I am, because you haven't paid me back the money you owe me."

If this debt was driving a wedge between the two of you, the time for addressing it was not on her birthday.

"LawGrad001" wrote:

Dinner, flowers, and a card sounds nice to me without even the debt part.

So, there you have it! The moral compass of the wonderful world of Reddit has concluded that this woman is kind of an as*hole. Scratching off something that's bothering you on your own checklist isn't exactly a birthday gift to someone else.

It's not uncommon to hear people claim that being a parent is the most important job you'll ever have, or that life just feels different after you've started raising your own child. While these statements can feel lofty, they're often meant to remind tired parents that the long-term emotional investment of children eventually outweighs the burdensome feelings and exhaustion.

However, not all parents feel the same about their choice to have kids, and it's reductive to refer to erase real life experiences with cozy expectations of how people should feel. There are times when someone has kids and finds out very quickly they weren't prepared for the sacrifices ahead, but it's too late to turn back.

In a recent post on the Am I The A*shole subreddit, a tired dad asked if he was wrong for admitting he regrets having kids during a marriage counseling session.

AITA for admitting I regret having children.

OP began the post by sharing that his wife and him have been attending counseling to patch up the tensions that have formed in their marriage.

My wife and I are both 42 and in marriage counseling after our marriage basically went to sh*t after having kids (6 and 4 year old twins). A lot of issues and disagreements have come up in our marriage that have driven us apart and I have been working through my resentment that going back for one more baby resulted in twins, including one which we are pretty sure has ADHD and ODD and is a nightmare child).

At one point in their counseling, a therapist asked OP if he would have children if he had the opportunity to "do it all over again," and OP said no.

Our counselor asked me if I would have children if I had to do it all over again and I said "honestly, no".

OP went on to reveal that while he loves his kids, the toll its taken on his physical and mental health doesn't feel worth it to him.

Particularly, since one of their kids has behavioral issues that are hard to manage.

I love my kids and would take a bullet for them, but if I had the chance to go back to 24 when I finished grad school and could do my life over again, I wouldn't choose fatherhood. It is not the fulfilling experience everyone claims and while I love my children, the sacrifices are not worth it to me. I had a much happier life before having children and have gone from someone who loved life to someone who just.....makes it through the day, working a job he hates to provide for the wife and kids while silently wishing this wasn't my life.

When OP revealed these feelings in therapy, his wife got deeply upset and even went so far as to tell their oldest child.

My wife is furious and taking it the wrong way and even told our 6 year old "daddy wishes you were never born" which makes me livid. You don't tell the kid that.

OP felt betrayed when his wife told their 6-year-old about his feelings, since he never intended to hurt his children and only shared within the context of therapy.

Yes, I wish I never had kids, but I do love them, would never hurt them or want to upset them. And I didn't say it to/in front of my kids and I never ever will. I said it in marriage counseling, what should be a safe space to talk about feelings.

This has caused a huge fight between OP and his wife, and now their attempts at patching the marriage have dissolved into discussions over divorce and custody.

It has become a huge fight, our marriage is not going to be saved now, and I know she will try and use this against my in divorce court to try and get sole custody and take everything and lie to the kids who I do love and still want to be a Dad to them. She is incapable of understanding that you can love your kids but also feel that parenthood was the best choice for you.

AITA for saying it though?

Edit: Ok this blew the f*ck up and there is no way I can reply to everyone's questions. But to address a couple I have 3 kids not 4. One child is 6, two are four. English is not my first language and I forgot the comma, and even so that sentence would have been much clearer in my native language.

OP went on to clarify that he truly does love his children, but dealing with a child with ODD and ADHD on top of working and raising two other kids has pretty much sucked up his energy.

When I say I resent having twins, I am not saying it is my wife's fault! But 3 children is more than we budgeted/bargained for and I need to pick up a lot overtime I that I would not have had to pick up if we just had 2 kids, and that is what I resent (that and the child with ADHD/ODD). My life is basically work and dealing with my kids. And do you know what ODD is? This child always refuses to do what is asked, gets angry and throws a tantrum when asked to do something he doesn't want to do, hits and kicks others, deliberately annoys and hurts others, is extremely spiteful, screams and kicks me constantly. ALWAYS. All day. Every day. It's exhausting and it is hell.

Yeah. I wouldn't have him again. Most people wouldn't if they had to raise him.

Just because I wouldn't do this over again doesn't mean I'm not committed to being a good dad and being present in their lives. I just would not do it over again if I could redo my adult life.

My first kid was not born at 24, I just said that because if I could do my whole post-University life differently, I would change some other things too (mainly career) and to be honest, after all this, I regret marrying my wife, which is why I said it that way.

Regarding calling the ADHD/ODD twin a nightmare, go google what that means. It is very difficult to manage and he has even been kicked out of three daycare places because they could not handle him and my parents even refuse to babysit him. We never get a break from home and no one can handle time.

canithrowitaway9999 shared she thinks there needs to be more honesty about the difficulties of parenthood, and how it doesn't feel worth it for some people even if they love their kids.

Throwaway for this:

I love my two daughters so much, but if I could do it all over again, I wouldn't be a mom. It is still a big taboo to admit that having children isn't the most amazing thing in the world, but for a lot of us, the lows far outweigh the highs. I'd never ever tell my kids I feel this way, but I think this is something you should be able to be honest about with you partner in marriage counselling, and the fact she told your child this is disgusting.

NTA.

qhvmsk echoed that OP is NTA for sharing difficult feelings in a therapy session.

Throwing for this: I'm in the same boat. Having my son ruined my life. My husband left me when she was a baby because he hated it and I was left a single mom. He dodges child support and my career is ruined because I have little support and had go onto the mommy track, I don't get to do a thing for myself outside the house and my son has autism and is just....a handful and a really difficult kid. I love him, but honestly, I'd command+Z my son if I could.

NTA for feeling it or saying it, because like you say, you said it in marriage counselling, not to you kids. You would have been TA if you said it to the kids or where they could have heard you, but you didn't.

amie71 thinks it was wildly inappropriate for OP's wife to violate the privacy of a counseling session.

NTA you said it in a counseling session where you are supposed to be able to talk through these things and listen to your partner without judgment. Your wife was majorly in the wrong for taking a comment out of the session and telling a child. If she didn’t understand how you meant it, she should have discussed it further IN the session

koeghls thinks OP should keep being honest about his feelings in therapy, his wife be damned.

This is so sad. I'm so sorry. You're NTA at all. A lot of parents feel exactly this way - you love your kids but you regret having them. That's pretty normal, and so is the guilt associated with that feeling. You're doing the right thing by going to marriage counseling, and I suggest going to individual counseling as well. Your wife should not have ever said that to your child. I doubt they'll ever forget hearing that.

piximelon thinks it's completely understandable OP's wife was upset, but she handled it badly.

NTA, your wife wouldn't have been either if she hadn't brought the child into this. What you said is obviously going to be upsetting for your wife to hear, and she had the right to feel whatever emotions about it, but she crossed a line big time.

OP, you are not an asshole for admitting something that many parents feel, and I just want to tell you that it can and usually does get better. Our middle kid is diagnosed with ADHD and ODD so I really, truly feel for you. Someone who hasn't dealt with a child like that has no idea. Maybe it's time to take all of that effort you're using on your marriage, and use it for yourself instead like individual therapy or dedicating time to a hobby/just chill "me time".

If anything was made obvious by this thread, it's clear that parenting isn't a tender duty for all involved, and being honest about those complicated feelings doesn't negate love you have for your children.

Secret Santa is the perfect tradition for anyone that loves getting awkward gifts from people they work with. If you're participating in Secret Santa this year, you will definitely relate to these hilarious memes.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

22.

23.

Given the intensity of their job, it's safe to say that doctors have a monopoly on miraculous workplace stories. Not many jobs involve being put in a position to potentially save someone's life, and while there are some relatively untreatable injuries and diseases out there, for every rule there is an exception.

One of the absurdities of mortality is just how arbitary it can feel at times. Some people survive brutal violence, extreme accidents, and pernicious diseases, while others pass away suddenly. Since stories of senseless loss seem to flood the newscycle, it's nice to scope out the rare, sometimes inexplicable tales of survival.

In a recent Reddit thread, doctors shared the wildest injuries they've seen patients walk away from.

1. GiveItAWeek is still not sure how that man lived.

Not a doctor, but I'm a firefighter so I see my fair share of trauma. About a year ago, we responded to a call that went out as an "individual who had a car fall on his face". He was hot-boxing in his garage while working underneath his car that was supported by scissor jacks. Something to note, the car didn't have any tires on the front end where he was working.

One of the scissor jacks had slipped out from underneath the car, and the whole weight of the car landed directly onto the side of his head with no tires to stop the fall. We got our rubber airbags out, lifted the car, pulled him out, and got him onto a stretcher. After taking 2,500 lbs of weight to the head, he somehow got out of it with a fractured orbital and a laceration on his cheek.

2. Gizmo9483 is just glad they helped a man survive.

First year of my core surgical training I was on call in a very small rural hospital. This hospital only had 2 doctors on at night, me and a medical trainee, and no emergency doctors.

It's about 11pm and this guy, 26 comes in after being in a fight. Blood pumping from his nose which was clearly fractured. I suspected he probably had other facial fractures underneath but he was awake and talking to me, otherwise seemed fine. I spent about 45 minutes trying to stop the blood, using all sorts of nose packs, pressure, even tried a catheter balloon to try and tamponade it. Nothing was working, and he was starting to go into shock, and I was basically shitting myself at this stage. Based on his vitals I'd estimated he'd lost almost 1.5 litres of blood so far. Nearest proper surgical hospital was 45 minutes away, and my consultant was at home, 25 minutes from the hospital.

Eventually I got four bags of o neg from the lab (the lab tech happened to be in, which was very lucky), put this guy in the back of an ambulance, still bleeding, and sent him blue light to the surgical centre in the city. Got a phone call about 3 hours later from a surgeon at the other hospital, saying he had brought the patient to theatre and been able to control the situation. He was probably 15 minutes from dead.

If you come into that kind of small hospital with that much bleeding, all stats say you're in trouble. The guy was very lucky his friends got him in so quickly.

3. kberrysauce watched a kid with a skewered leg take a piss.

I was a surgical resident in a small town hospital. We got paged to see a patient for a speared piece of driftwood through the leg. We were thinking it was a nicked femoral artery and discussing if this poor kid needed amputation when we saw him he was standing on the skewered leg taking a piss. Turns out the wood missed every single one of the vital vessels and no fracture - just muscular damage.

4. Ratethendelete saw a man come back to life.

Junior doc on the Trauma team. Doors to Resus fly open to reveal a man carrying a second blood soaked man in his arms. Get him onto a stretcher and it is clear he has gunshot wound to his chest and has gone into cardiac arrest (asystole). Chest compressions start and within minutes the A&E consultant is performing an open thoracotomy in order to start cardiac massage.

Cardiothoracics join us quickly and get to work on the heart - a hole in the right ventricle is identified and plugged with a Foley catheter. All the while bag after bag of o neg is being pushed into the patient in an attempt to replace everything that had pumped out of his heart and into his thoracic cavity. 15-20 mins into this the impossible happens - we get ROSC (the heart starts beating in its own).

Patient is taken directly to theatre where the hole is definitively repaired and bilateral chest drains are inserted to drain the blood filling his lungs (technically the pleural space). Somehow his heart continued beating and after a couple weeks on ITU, the patient is returned to the trauma ward awake and alert. Several weeks, some mild hypoxic brain injury, and a gnarly chest scar later and he walks off the ward with his dad, the man who carried him in.

ETA definition of ROSC: Return Of Spontaneous Circulation.

5. Slidingscale has seen what meth can do.

Every time I think this question, the answer is usually "meth."

One guy got hit in the face hard enough to let air into his brain cavity and was being an absolute arsehole (which seemed to be normal for him) and literally asked "got any meth?" when I offered some pain relief. To my understanding, he recovered without any need for surgery.

6. Ocean4951 saw a toddler survive the unthinkable.

I was working in the emergency department when a toddler came in after falling out of a 3 story window completely unharmed. The sad thing was they were from a rough neighbourhood and the Mum hadn’t noticed for about half an hour.

Apparently the friendly apartment pot smokers found found him, checked him over and sat with him for half an hour and when Mum didn’t show up went to find her. The child was admitted overnight mostly for social reasons but it’s just amazing how well kids bounce.

7. elandy126 saw a man with a chainsaw in his neck.

Emergency Nurse.

Once had a guy come in who had been cutting a tree with a chainsaw when it hit a knot in the wood and kicked up into his neck. Finished cutting the tree because he knew his wife would make him get rid of the chainsaw. Put a towel on it and drove himself to the hospital. CT showed no vascular damage, simple wash out and home the next day.

One of the paramedics who saw him said to his patient "that's a real emergency, why don't we ever get those"

Edit: Location Australia Queensland

8. Zeethro saw an impaled man survive.

Not a doctor (yet), but I worked in a trauma center as a scribe before starting med school. Basically, I was attached at the hip with a doctor to do their documentation.

One guy wrecked his car into a wooden fence, and a wooden fence post went in his mouth and came out the back of his neck. It was the kind of fence post that was double the size of his mouth. It had basically pushed all of the important anatomy to the side as it impaled him. There were consulting doctors for like 10 different specialties working on this guy in the hospital. Several weeks later, after he fully recovered, he walked back in the emergency department to thank everyone.

9. Mrbl-Hplr put a few bandaids on a man after a bad car wreck.

Not a doctor, yet, but during one of my night shift as a medical student, I had to take in charge a patient who came to the ER for a « car accident ». Well, that’s quite common... What is not is that he came by himself, from 40kms, by calling a taxi because his car was absolutely wrecked in the accident.

Normally, when your car ends up upside down, after 2 or 3 roll overs at 60km/h (which the patient did), you are not really fine... However, he was totally OK ! No broken bone, no head trauma, no abdominal pain, nothing ! He just came to the ER because he had little dermabrasions over his knees and one elbow, and « it hurts when it rubs against my clothes » Three band-aids later, and he was good to go!

10. Jssolms' patient lived to see a better day.

I had a patient that attempted suicide with an AR-15 under the chin. Put a hole in the soft tissues of the floor of his mouth, in his tongue, in his hard palate, and then split the hemispheres of his brain perfectly, finally popping out the top of his skull. He recovered fully.

11. varsil's friend was considered dead in the lab.

Not a doctor, but a friend's story:

He'd been feeling like shit for a long time, went to the doctor. Doctor ordered a bunch of blood tests, and ordered them on a 'rush' basis.

The lab calls the doctor to bitch him out. "Why the f*ck did you make us rush these tests?" Doctor is confused. Lab is like, "The guy is clearly dead, so what's the f*cking rush?"

Doctor calls him, tells him to NOT DRIVE but to get himself to emergency ASAP.

Guy was a type 1 diabetic, hadn't realized it until way later in life, and apparently his bloodwork suggested he was a corpse rather than a living person. He's still doing fine.

12. Xralius miraculously survived.

Patient: Not as cool as most of these, but I was puking for 3 days straight before going into urgent care. I wasn't even going to to go in, but my family said I looked awful and I eventually relented. They said I had appendicitis. Due to a mix up I didn't get operated on for over a day later. When they went in, my appendix was gangrenous and had basically disintegrated. Turns out it had burst/ruptured days ago.

Normally, this floods your body with toxins and you die, but apparently my colon was positioned in such a way that it blocked that from happening. I was in the hospital for another week before my digestive system restarted and had to have bile pumped out of my stomach. All in all though, not a terrible experience.

13. DylanIRL's coworker broke every bone in his face.

Not a doctor, but a fellow worker took a 35 lbs steel plate being propelled by 3770 psi (equivalent to 188.5 car tires) to the face.

Sent him 15 feet in the air, and 40 feet back. Broke every bone in his face. Lived and back to work 8 months later.

EDIT: My math with car tires is awful. I'd meant to try and put it in terms I thought redditors may understand. Also, TIL car tires optimal psi rating is 30-35.

It was 26 MPA. 5500m hole with 2 7/8ths tubing, on a 6.5" cased hole, with roughly 300-350' of 3" flowline to a 3" 10000 psi rated manifold. It's a lot of pressure.

14. rramzi had an eventful time working on a gunshot wound.

Intern year doing surgery, guy gets brought in for a gunshot wound to the head. He was working at a jeweler that got robbed, his coworker was black bagged at the scene.

He gets brought into the trauma bay and it’s pretty hectic because GSW to the head and well he’s alive. Not only is he alive he’s following commands but not speaking, probably from the shock.

Cops are giving us report saying he was likely shot with a .357 snub nose they recovered at the scene. So we do our primary and secondary survey and all this guy has is a single wouldwound to his left frontal scalp where the bullet went in.

So the team hasn’t really seen something like this before. Sure a GSW to the head wasn’t new but this guy was otherwise completely fine. The decision was made to get a quick frontal and late head X-ray to verify where the bullet was before proceeding to CT. Well we don’t see any bullet on the films. There’s no bullet on the board or bed or within the patients clothes.

The man was shot in the head and the bullet bounced off his skull. CT showed no fracture even. It was wild, never seen anything like that since.

e: So a common question I’m getting is how do we know it was a GSW? He had gunpowder burns on his forehead around the wound.

15. Dr_D-R-E is traumatized, but relieved the woman and her babies lived.

I hope I never f*cking see this again:

Just finished a 24hr call so I’ll paraphrase, I’m an obgyn resident.

300lb African American female with IVF twins around 32 weeks gestation, multiple medical problems.

Chronic hypertension, being monitored inpatient. AMm rounds she looks uncomfortable, said she slept in a chair, just looked very anxious for no reason, breathing heavy. Blood pressure is very very high, we give meds

We can only get one twins heart, probably because she’s so big. We move her to L&D for closer monitoring, plus ready access to ultrasound

Now she has a lot of abdominal pain, blood pressure still very high, her breathing is getting heavier

Stat chest x ray shows her lungs are like, completely whited out, filling with fluid from flash pulmonary edema. At the same time her abdominal pain is worse and worse, big bright red clot falls out of her vagina. Same time, we get a ultrasound view of both fetuses, twin 2’s heart is super slow. Patient is now having a panic attack and screaming while also having v trouble breathing.

This is all within like, 10 minutes.

Stat/emergency/crash C section

Get her on the table,

She starts having an eclamptic seizure.

Anesthesia does rapid sequence intubation.

Loud. Long. Steady. Beep.

Patient goes into cardiac arrest on the table.

“Code blue, labor and delivery” goes out overhead throughout the hospital.

Phones all over the floor start blowing up, white coats and scrubs sprinting onto the floor.

ICU comes running. Rapid response team comes running. General surgery comes running. A double NICU team comes running.

There’s like 30 people in the OR.

ICU. Is giving chest compressions and running the code. Surgery is putting in a central line. Rapid response is setting up to shock. Ob/Gyn is doing the c-section.

I remember the attending yell: “cut! Cut! Cut!”

Obgyn goes skin to baby #1 in about 54 seconds. There’s blood everywhere, compressions still going while operating. Second baby comes out very still looking, placental abruption: the high blood pressure flooded her lungs and tore the placenta off the uterus.

NICU takes both babies, they eventually do just fine as far as hospital course goes.

Mom achieves ROSC (return of spontaneous compressions, her heart is beating on its own now).

Still bleeding.

Massive transfusion protocol initiated, she eventually gets somewhere between 14-20 units of packed red blood cells plus plasma, platelets, other stuff (THANK YOU FOR GIVING BLOOD, it actually, actively saves the lives of people who wish they could know who to thank).

Conservative surgical measures don’t stop the bleeding. Couvelaire uterus is diagnosed secondary to placental abruption In the setting of eclamptic seizure.

Cesarean-hysterectomy is performed. Uterus comes out.

Patient remains intubated for about 2 days. Downgraded from SICU.

Walks out of the god damn hospital after 1 week because that’s how a solid medical team handles their shit.

Now, there were a lot of red flags to indicate delivery at the beginning of this story, but she spiraled so fast, there really wasn’t any significant wasted time.

16. pawprint76 is lucky they didn't have a stroke.

Not a doctor, but a patient. My husband took me to the local hospital's ED for ongoing severe lower abdominal pain (I figured uterus?). The nurses took blood, hooked me up to an IV, and gave me a little pain medicine. A nurse I hadn't yet seen came into the ED room looking very nervous and told me I was being admitted as my platelet count was 6,000. My husband and I were like, what? The nurse was very surprised I had no symptoms like bruising, nose bleeds, and blood in urine or stool. He looked very concerned and the medical team rushed to get me into a room.

The only symptoms I had were fatigue and heavy menstrual flow - both symptoms had been my companions since I started my period at 11 years old. The next morning a hematologist came to my room and explained my diagnosis and that it was entirely idiopathic. He told me I was lucky to not have had crazy internal bleeding, bleeding into my brain or a stroke. He prescribed a regimen of 60mg of Prednisone daily, which I was on for a year and a half (not recommended - it was awful).

The idiopathic thrombocytopenia made no progress. It was FINALLY decided to proceed with a splenectomy. Recovery was brutal. Having a huge incision down the length of your abdomen makes everyday tasks very difficult and painful. Almost five years later, my platelet count is normal. My period can go to hell in a hand basket, though.

17. FifthEllyment found out it's better to get hit in the face than

I'm a researcher rather than a doctor, but during my undergrad my anatomy tutor told us of an interesting case study. A woman in the same department had been in a car accident going a considerable speed. The seat belt failed to lock and her face flew into the steering wheel. Her mouth, nose, cheekbones and forehead were shattered, yet she suffered no brain damage.

Apparently, the front of her face acted as a crumple zone and the fact her skull shattered meant the cranial swelling didn't cause any damage because the brain had more space to swell in to. She needed significant reconstructive surgery, but a year later she and my tutor teamed up in a research project.

They used her case as the basis for looking into new ways to treat severe head injuries and developed new treatment protocols depending on where the skull had taken damage. They basically found out that, if you're going to have a head injury, try and get hit in the face and not the temples because you're much more likely to survive.

18. bfahns58 is glad the farmer survived.

Farmer was driving a tractor with one of those huge rolls of hay on the back. The hay was not secured correctly so when he stopped it rolled forward over him and bent him in half. All he had was 2 compression fractures in his lumbar region.

19. KamahlYrgybly was amazed this woman survived without fluids.

An elderly lady had a massive brain hemorrhage, was transferred to terminal care to the health center in-patient ward I was working at as the doctor. Her prognosis was that she would die at any moment. There was no treatment, she was comatose, but breathing spontaneously through a tracheotomy tube.

A week passed, with no medications, no food, no fluids, still alive. Then she began to stir, came conscious. Delirious, but conscious. So we started i.v. fluids, appropriate medications, and eventually physiotherapy. After a few months she moved into the local nursing home, lived for a few years. She had profound dementia, but was able to move.

I wonder if the air-moisturising device in the room (because of the tracheotomy) kept her hydrated, because a healthy person would generally not survive a week without fluids.

20. TatsumaruTheTwofaced is constantly astounded by Tim.

Not a doctor. My dad who is one told me this story once.

He has this 12 year old patient (lets call him Tim) and everyone in the hospital firmly believes he's immortal.

Tim was born with a bad heart and is constantly in an out of the ICU. By in and out of the ICU, he goes in almost once or twice a month.

9 out of 10 admissions, Tim flatlines. Strangely, Tim always comes back, even if you don't resuscitate him.

I'd say Tim flatlined about 15-ish times in total.

It's at the point that whenever Tim flatlines, nobody panicks. Not even his mom and the first three times she fell on the floor crying. "Hey guys, Tim's vitals are dropping." "Again? Wew, that kid's definately going for a record"

Tim's pretty chill about it too. He talks about his ICU trips like how a normal kid talks about a mildly eventful day at school.

Nobody knows how tf does Tim always come back. He just does. Frankly, I'm surprised the media hasn't done a story about it bc it's fucking metal.

With so many holiday products getting rolled out every Christmas season, it's a wonder that major mistakes don't happen more frequently. But now one big story in particular has Santa blushing.

Family-friendly retailer Walmart committed a major oopsie recently by selling a controversial sweater on their marketplace featuring Santa kicking back and enjoying drugs ahead of his big day.

The sweater was listed for sale on Walmart's Canadian website and depicted Santa, complete with dialated pupils, seated in front of a coffee table lined with drugs and the words "Let It Snow" emblazoned across the front.

Even more unbelievable was the product description for this ugly Christmas sweater:

This might be the first time Santa himself landed on the naughty list. Walmart was quick to pull the product and issue an apology, stating:

“These sweaters, sold by a third-party seller on Walmart.ca, do not represent Walmart’s values and have no place on our website. We have removed these products from our marketplace. We apologize for any unintended offence this may have caused.”

But it was too late and word of their wild holiday sweater had quickly spread across social media. Many were wistful they missed out on purchasing this hotly-debated sweater:

Overall, most just found the whole incident hilarious:

No word on how many people managed to snag this sweater before it was removed. To them, I hope they share the reactions they got from wearing it at office holiday parties and family gatherings this year.

It's a turbulent time in America, and two things have defined the day: the House Judiciary Committee impeachment hearing, and Lizzo's butt.

On Sunday night, Lizzo and her butt went to see the Lakers-Timberwolves game at the Staples Center in LA.

While rooting for the Timberwolves on Lakers turf, Lizzo did something even more controversial: bare her butt in a thong dress.

An a**-less dress sounds extremely unhygenic and uncomfortable, but Lizzo was happy, and twerking on the JumboTron as the Laker Girls danced to her song "Juice."

Many people were not amused by the near-nudity, arguing that it's inappropriate to have your butt out at an event where there are kids.

People then accused the anti-thong dress debate of being hypocrites. Dancers at sporting events often have their cleavage, and boobs are the butts of the chest.

To many people, the backlash to the back of Lizzo's dress was an expression of fatphobia, because thin women's butts are often revealed without incident.

Then came the inevitable backlash to the backlash, as other tweeters argued that the issue wasn't Lizzo's butt, but the time and place at which she chose to bare it. To paraphrase A League of Their Own, "there are no butts in basketball."

One thing is for sure: people spent the day thinking and talking about Lizzo, a day on which she just happened to be dropping a new music video.

The timing is good as hell.

"New beginnings are in order, and you are bound to feel some level of excitement as new chances come your way."

-Auliq Ice

When the clock strikes midnight on December 31st, we will be in a whole new decade. There will be new adventures, new experiences, and a lot of the same old b.s. Before you dive into the whole "new year, new me" thing, take a moment to laugh at these hilarious end of the year memes.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

22.

23.

24.